#reference
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my grandparents have to lock their car doors when they go to sunday mass because people have been breaking in to unlocked cars and leaving entire piles of zucchini
i feel like i should’ve added more context when i posted this. my grandparents live in a rural area where farmers and casual gardeners alike are, at this point in the year, suddenly being hit with unexpectedly abundant zucchini crops. there aren’t just some random vandals leaving zucchinis in people’s cars for the hell of it, this is the work of some very exasperated, probably very elderly, folks who have more zucchini than they know what to do with
Yep. You can also expect to find a bag of zucchini on your porch.
My grandfather once found his neighbor stealing his tomatoes out of his garden at three in the morning. Red-handed, with a basket of the nearly-ripened ones. He thought he was going to find gophers or something, but no, here’s Henry, taking his tomatoes. The best ones.
There was a long pause between them.
My grandfather (allegedly) said, “Henry… it’s OK. You can take some tomatoes if you want them.”
Henry sighed in relief.
“But,” my grandfather said, “you have to take two zucchini for every tomato.”
There was another long silence. “That’s a harsh bargain, John,” said Henry. “But I accept. I’ll tell Joe up the street, too.”
My grandfather said, “Tell Joe he needs to take three.”
a friend of my dad’s came by in the middle of the night, he seemed very nervous when my dad answered the door. he wouldn’t come inside but he leaned in and whispered to my dad in spanish, “i have some fresh grapes for you.” and then this happened:
the melon was a special bonus.
MY DREAM
A friend of mine lives in a rural area and he has been surrounded by zucchini for most of May, June, and July.
At one point he was so done with the whole zucchini madness that he came to classes actively begging people to “Please please please!! Take some my family’s damned zucchini!! I’ve been eating zucchini for weeks!! I’m going insane!!!”
Having grown up in a rural area and having come home to zucchini on the front step or in the mailbox, i find it highly amusing the OP had to clarify. I’m sitting here nodding “yup.”
I have a friend with a garden in Oregon who literally made Zucchini Chocolate Chip Cookies and sent them to me in Indiana. I texted her back “I SEE WHAT YOU’RE DOING HERE”
I’m waiting for the day when someone will hear about my background in Botany and ask me for advice on what someone who’s just wanting to start exploring planting vegetables should try.
I know fuckall about gardening because my background is wild plants and not agriculture, but I’m gonna tell them
“Zucchini. Definitely try Zucchini. Just plant plenty of them and you’ll get a decent sized crop! They’re very rewarding to grow.”
It may be a bit of a long game, but I’ll enjoy their screams of despair from across the void as they realize that they will eat zucchini forever
This is NOT an exaggeration, guys. Zucchini (and most squashes, really) will outgrow you so fast. Let our tale be a caution– or an encouragement, whichever. You decide as you hear the story of Squish.
When we were so broke we had to choose between gas and store-bought-food (I think I was about 10?), we had a garden so we could eat regularly (we also had chickens and pigs and hunted, but that’s beside this point). One summer, we planted 6 rows of yellow squash and 6 rows of zucchini. Each row probably had 10, maybe 12 plants in it. We created this giant squash-block in our garden plot so it was all right there together in the middle, and the needier plants like tomatoes were on the outside of the whole plot. We thought we were clever, til the first crop started coming in.
The outside two rows of each squash, yellow and zucchini, were normal. High yield, of course (because squash), but standard size for both summer squash and Italian zucchini. The inner 8 rows, however, created this hybrid monstrosity that we called Squish. It was pretty– a nice swirly yellow and green combination that made it clear the squash and zucchini had interbred.
Squish became a living nightmare for us. Something about the hybridization caused them to forget how to stop growing, or at least how to grow at a normal rate because those suckers were longer than my dad’s forearm, and bigger around than my (albeit child-sized) thighs. They didn’t get all hard and nasty on the inside, either, for some reason, like most squash will at that size. And they just kept coming. I don’t even remember seeing that many flowers, but every day we were pulling upwards of 20lbs of Squish out of the garden, only for there to be more the next day, or sometimes by the end of the day if we harvested in the morning. I don’t know where they were hiding, but it was like some sort of squash portal had opened into our yard and started crapping out Frankenstein’s Squashes.
At first, it was great. We could eat all we wanted and not worry about rationing it. But the growing season in Arkansas is long, and we had incredible weather that summer, so those darn things kept alternating flowers and fruit. Pull off a few Squish, new flowers budded out, and they ripened super-fast in the heat. We were absolutely swimming in Squish, because they were so big that even gorging on them meant only 1 or 2 got eaten per meal. (I think I recall using a few particularly enormous ones as swords for a duel with my sister, if that says anything about their size. I cannot overemphasize how absolutely, heinously gigantic they were. You probably don’t believe me but I am not kidding. Those things were bigger than a newborn by several many inches and a couple pounds.)
We had (luckily) a big deep freezer, and someone gifted us a bunch of freezer ziploc bags, so we started chopping them up and freezing them as we pulled them off. We ran out of bags real fast, so we caved and bought a ton more. We filled that deep freezer near to bursting. It was probably 3-4 feet deep, (as I remember barely coming up to the edge of it), and at least 4-5 feet long, about 2.5 feet across, and we filled it to the top with Squish. And that’s while we’re eating fresh ones every day with dinner! But still more Squish came before the first frost, so we started packing the fridge. And my grandma’s freezer. And my grandma’s fridge. And feeding them to the pigs and chickens. And giving them away at church.
Do you realize how big a deal it is that people who were so broke that they had to choose between gas and the power bill were GIVING AWAY FOOD??? That’s how much gosh darn Squish we had. And little did I know, but apparently, my dad HATES squash. He only planted them because they were a cheap, quick source of food and my mom loved squashes. And he got stuck with the folly of his decisions. For over a year.
Yep. We had Squish in the freezer for over a year. Eating it regularly. It lasted for over a year. A family of 5, plus often feeding my grandmother, we ate off a single garden’s haul for over a year. Of just the Squish. I tell you, if we’d had a farmer’s market back then, that Squish could probably have single-handedly lifted us out of poverty. Well, maybe not, but you get the idea.
We never planted both again, probably because my dad would have combusted out of rage if he’d ever seen another Squish in his life. But manthose were the days for thems of us what loved squash.
So survival tip: If you need an absolute crapton of food, plant you a row of yellow squash and a row of zucchini, and keep that pattern going for as many rows as you like. You too can drown in Squish and love it.
Oh wow.
The last story is well worth the read. It might be long but I found it absolutely delightful! Thank you for sharing your childhood Squish gardening adventures!
Meanwhile, people are starving to death.
Ands What do you expect poor rural farmers who just have excess zucchini to do about that exactly? Mail them to Africa?
I was just talking to a friend today about gardening and she said “I’ll plant zucchini for this project.”
“Oh dear… what’s your damage control plan?”
“Oh,” she said, intuiting what I meant. “Eating the blossoms. Love stuffed blossoms. Pumpkin, squash, zucchini. It keeps the crop down, and you get lots of mileage out of them. You keep a mixed crop that way, too. Plus, people don’t always welcome gifts of zucchini, but they find gifts of blossoms exciting.”
This struck me as absolutely game-changing.
My problem is that I legitimately love zucchini. “Lizard,” you ask, “why is that a problem? Just eat the zucchini!” The problem is that in the middle of the growing season, there will be a point where I physically can not consume enough zucchini to keep up with what the plants are producing. It does not matter how much I chop, freeze, fry, bake, etc– there will always be a point where I have more zucchini than I have time in the day to do something with that zucchini.
But eventually it runs out. Like summer, it’s as intense as it is fleeting and come November I want for some zucchini fried with onions. By January, when I’m planning out the spring garden, there’s always that thought, that voice of hubris whispering in my ear… “maybe I should grow more zucchini?”
Children, it is a trap.
[Image: A table all but overflowing with bunches of dark purple grapes (and one round melon with a white rind). End ID.]
Wands Wands Reversed
W – Wild S – Self-Serving
A – Ardent D – Domineering
N – Noisy N – Novelty
D – Dynamic A – Arrogant
S – Sexy W – Wander-Lust
Cups Cups Reversed
C – Caring S – Seduction
U – Undying P – Promiscuous
P – Proposal U – Unforgiving
S – Sincere C – Clinging
Swords Swords Reversed
S – Strategic S- Severe
W – Witty D- Dysfunctional
O – Observant R- Repressed
R – Reserved O – Obsessive
D – Discerning W – Worry
S – Self-Disciplined S – Sharp
Pentacles Pentacles Reversed
P – Practical S – Stubborn
E – Enduring E – Egocentric
N – Natural L – Lazy
T – Traditional C – Conservative
A – Approachable A – Adventurer/ess
C – Committed T – Tedious
L – Loyal N – Negligent
E – Energetic E – Envious
S – Sensual P – Possessive
These are my basic interpretations for each of the runes of the Elder Futhark. While these explanations may reveal the basic meanings of these symbols, at least according to my own research and experience, they only scratch the surface of the layers of wisdom that can be found in the runes. For deeper study, there are many wonderful books out there that expand on them. I would personally recommend Diana Paxson’s Taking Up the Runes as a great starting point.
As a personal aside, I would consider myself a fairly conservative interpreter of the runes. I feel that the best basis for them can be found in reliable sources, such as existing lore and the rune poems. As such, I attempt to adhere closely to these sources when it comes to explaining the meaning of each symbol.
Fehu: Fehu means cattle and signifies wealth, but it is a wealth that is best used when moving through the community generously. The rune cautions against hoarding wealth and cites the discord that can result.
Uruz: Uruz stands for aurochs, which was a species of horned cattle common to the ancient world. As such, it is a rune of primal strength and determination. The rune can also mean rain.
Thurisaz: Thurisaz represents the giants of the Norse tales and is a rune of chaos and unrest. It could also be interpreted as a rune of Thor, which would turn the symbol into one of protection against those same chaotic forces.
Ansuz: Ansuz is the rune of Odin, which makes it a rune of wisdom. In the Anglo-Saxon rune poem the symbol also represents the mouth, lending an additional meaning of wisdom through communication and messages.Raido: Raido means ride and is a rune of travel. While the journey may be swift and joyful, the rune poem warns of the toll the journey will take on the horse. This suggests that one must take care of those who help us along the way.
Kenaz: Kenaz is the torch that illuminates the way through darkness to a warm hearth and good company. However, as the fire burns for warmth, it can also cause pain and may indicate illness.
Gebo: Gebo signifies the rune of gifts and generosity. The rune also represents the cycle of reciprocity and the right-relationship that results when maintained.
Wunjo: Wunjo denotes the rune of joy. It is a bliss that can spring from prosperity, overcoming anxiety and sadness.
Hagalaz: Hagalaz represents hail, making it a rune of destruction and painful transition. All is not for naught however, for the ice seed will melt, giving water and growth to the hardier crops that survived.
Naudhiz: Naudhiz means need, and is a rune of constraint, oppression, and hard work that goes unrewarded. This is a challenging symbol, but the rune also indicates that lessons could be learned from the experience.
Isa: Isa stands for ice, fair to look upon but dangerous to traverse. This is a rune whose message is one of caution in situations where a particular decision seems desirable, but could be perilous. On the other hand, Isa can suggest stability and calm.
Jera: Jera is the rune for year and the harvest. It is manifestation of the rewards for hard work, with prosperity and abundance that sustains the individual or the community.
Eihwaz: Eihwaz is the symbol for the yew tree and can mean strength that is drawn from the line of ancestors. Eihwaz is also interpreted as the rune of Yggdrasil, which implies connection to the cosmos.
Perthro: Perthro is the dice-cup, the vessel from which the lots are cast, and the rune of chance. Perthro can represent uncertainty in everything from light-hearted gaming to the vagaries of fate.
Elhaz: Elhaz is the rune of the elk and the sedge. The shape of the rune resembles that of the antlers of the elk and the thorn of the sedge, making this a symbol of protection.
Sowilo: Sowilo represents the sun, making it a rune of illumination, victory, and power. The rune can also mean guidance, as one can always depend on the course of the sun to lead them to the end of their journey.
Tiwaz: Tiwaz is Tyr’s rune and is a symbol of justice and truth, potentially at the cost of self-sacrifice. Tiwaz also has an aspect of guidance in that right-action will always set you on the correct path.
Berkano: Berkano is the rune for the birch tree, indicating feminine strength and resourcefulness. From this meaning, it can be a rune for nurturing, healing, and regeneration.
Ehwaz: Ehwaz means horse and expresses the relationship between the horse and the rider. It is a rune of partnership, with attention given to those who help us along our journey. Naturally, the symbol can also represent movement and travel.
Mannaz: Mannaz is the symbol for “man” or “human,” and emphasizes the interconnected nature of human relationships. Mannaz can show the spectrum of these relationships, from comfort in good company to the more negative aspects of the human condition.
Laguz: Laguz is the rune for lake, making this a symbol for water. As such, this is a rune of potential and change, perhaps with the suggestion for flexibility through various situations. It can also mean the unconscious mind and the hidden wealth that lies beneath the surface.
Ingwaz: Ingwaz is Freyr’s rune and takes on the domains of the Vanic god as a symbol of fertility, productivity, and abundance. The rune can also symbolize masculine strength and the transforming cycles of life.
Dagaz: Dagaz means day and is the rune of new beginnings. With the day also brings hope, and is a welcome rune when life has been difficult. Dagaz can also signify the present moment and a call to “seize the day.”
Othala: Othala is the rune of the home and encompasses everything that entails, from the physical homestead to familial relationships of blood and heart. Othala also symbolizes the connection to the ancestors, from genetic inheritance to physical property passed on through the family line.
istj - Organic Earl Grey Blanc
estj - Istanbul Spice
isfj - Sweet Cinnamon Spice
esfj - Apricot Vanilla Crème
isfp - Flowering Honey Bush
esfp - Wild Sweet Orange
istp - Refresh Mint
estp - Scarlet Citrus Rooibos
intp - Chai Organic
entp - Organic Spicy Ginger
infp - Calm Chamomile
enfp - Green Ginger
infj- Gingerly Jasmine
enfj- Organic Baked Cinnamon Apple
intj - Awake English Breakfast
entj - Organic Sultry Strawberry
For drawing references
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they also have category options for gluten free, vegetarian/vegan, lactose free, etc.
if you’re disabled and have trouble cooking, this may be worth it to check out. if you’re not disabled or you don’t have trouble cooking, it’d be cool to signal boost it for those who do need it. for people with very few go to meals, food can be boring and repetitive, so this is pretty cool :*
Cool for mentally ill ppl too!
Yay!
Please apread this around, dear followers. As a disabled veteran with both physical disabilities and mental illness, especially when I was single, I would often go a day or more at a time without eating (or eating only food I could simply unwrap and eat or throw in the nuke for two minutes), not because I didn’t have any food, but because food preparation seemed like an overwhelming task. (Or because I forgot.) And my health suffered for it. This blog may not save a life, but it can significantly increase the quality.