Me(sighing as I gather my papers) : Yeah you’re right Karen, of course. I mean let’s look at the evidence…
Kylo has:
- A tragic backstory born of family misunderstanding and betrayal.
- Years of emotional and physical abuse at the hands of a sinister predator, yet still manages to hold a deep emotional center.
- Deep regret at killing his father, so much that it physically hinders him. Soulless monster that one.
- A mystical connection to our plucky heroine so deep that he proposes asks her to be his wife partner every time he is in the same place as her.
- An inability to blow up his mom.
- The aesthetic look and body of a Byronic sex god.
- Eyes more soulful than 50 puppies.
- Lips like a European male model after he’s eaten a strawberry Blow Pop.
- Always crying.
Stories or characters that mention Kylo:
- Continue to reference just how adorable he was as a baby, in a bid to humanize him.
- Talk about the dark shadow (Snoke) that loomed over him since he was in utero to let you know he’s been fighting evil for years.
- Keep letting you know how much pain he’s in.
- How angry he is…cause of the pain.
- Did I mention pain?
- His loneliness.
- No one is ever really gone.
- Drop anvil sized hints at his importance to the COSMIC WILL OF THE FORCE.
Oh and also he’s THE LAST FUCKING SKYWALKER.
But you are right Karen…he’s just gonna get stabbed or fall off a walkway or something. Rey wins and she’ll feel great about it. They’ll have a party with Crystal Foxes, Porgs, and Fish Nuns.
Fill in what I’ve missed people.
A little louder for those in back! The question is just how they plan on bringing our boy home
I hope he never dies but then we can’t dismiss the possibility cause this trilogy has been a roller coster. But if he does i think he will die saving everyone else…
I saw my mom and dad after so long on Takodana. They were in alot of pain. I could feel it.
I wish i could shout out “MOM DAD I LOVE YOU I AM SORRY HELP ME PLEASE..”.
Chewie was also there he is getting old. I remember how much he helped me maintain my hairstyle and the stories he told me when i wasn’t able to sleep.
I met a girl. Her name was Rey. I saw a little bit of myself in her. Lost, looking for love and happiness. She defeated me the scar she gave me isn’t half as painful as killing dad.
I feel like i am suffering. I told my dad his son was dead. But actually he is miserable. I feel so guilty. I wanted to prove my dad i was good enough but instead i proved otherwise.
