Alright, so uh. Something crazy happened yesterday. For the people tuning in from my cookie fostering acc, this is why I wasn’t able to post yesterday.
Basically, I discovered I was polyam, got a second partner, and found out my first partner was also polyam and had another partner they were nervous to tell me about.
I’ll start from the beginning here:
I was talking to one of my close friends on Discord last night…well, not really “talking,” more like exchanging memes with each other. For their privacy, I’ll call them Walker. Most of the memes we sent were just memes from the fandoms we were in (and most of that was Alan Walker stuff), but we sprinkled in some wholesome memes every now and then.
Then, out of nowhere, they sent a wholesome meme that went something along the lines of “the person who sent you this has feelings for you!!!”
I was pretty shocked at first, but I took it as a welcome one. I discovered some held back feelings I had for Walker, but at the same time, there was a problem. As I told you earlier, I had a partner before their confession, who I’ll call Bee for their privacy. Now, if I had known I was polyam earlier, this wouldn’t be a problem, BUUUUUT lookie here!
I sent a simple “:O!!!” as a response, which I thought would be better than saying nothing at the time. Then, I whipped out my phone and started texting Bee about it:
I told Bee nearly everything that happened, leaving out the undiscovered feelings and discovering I was polyam. I asked for advice on how to tell Walker I couldn’t be their partner without hurting their feelings, at least not by much. After they gave me advice, I had to wait until I could access messages with Walker again, since my time visiting my mom for the weekend was up and I had to go back to my internet-hating grandparents.
About 5 mins or so later, Bee tells me that they had to tell me something.
Then, lo and behold, they said they are polyam!!!
I was sort or surprised since holy shit what a coincidence, but at the same time, I wasn’t sure if then was the appropriate time to tell the whole truth. All I said was that I was completely ok with it and I wouldn’t mind if they got another partner.
Then, lo and behold, THEY HAD ANOTHER PARTNER!
They told me all about them, and I thought they sounded like a chill person. Then, Bee told me that they wouldn’t mind if I got another partner, either. At that point, I decided to tell them the entire truth about how Walker confessed to me, and, like Bee said, they were totally chill with it.
I shot a message up to Walker on another platform they use telling them that I did indeed love them back and there was something else I have to tell them, but I have yet to recieve a message back. Hoping for the best rn, will update y'all when I get a message back :]
Thinking about how my mom tried to “seduce” my dad when they were in college together by sneaking oranges into his backpack, because she grew up food insecure and feeding someone/sharing food was a big deal with her upbringing with a lot of emotional meaning–
and meanwhile my poor dad is just convinced that he’s been haunted by some citrus poltergeist because why the fuck are there always oranges in his bag he swears he did not put there???
Today I casually walked into yet another X-Files episode.
I went to one of the places where I work as a cleaner and noticed two bikes parked outside. I let myself in and was greeted by the guy who’s usually there when I show up.
I looked into some of the other rooms to see who else was there but I couldn’t find anyone and when I went back to the first room the guy was gone. Not thinking much of it I went down to the cellar to get some things where I ran into the guy again. He seemed to think he surprised me and said “Oh! Sorry!” and I just responded with “Hi”
As he left I mentally facepalmed thinking “God, how awkward of me to say hi to the same guy twice”
I got my stuff and went back upstairs where the guy was now wearing a jacked and waved at me “Goodbye! Have a nice evening”
“Bye” I said “Are you the last person to leave?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“I just noticed two bikes outside so I assumed there’d be more people here”
“Oh I see. One is mine and the other belongs to Jerry but he just left, so yes, I’m the last”
On the outside I remained calm and casual as I said “Ah okay” but on the inside I was screaming “THERE’S TWO GUYS?!!???! I’VE WORKED HERE FOR A YEAR AND I NEVER KNEW THEY WERE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE!!?!??! WHAT THE FUCK!!?!!?”
In my defence they have the exact same blonde Nick Carter haircut and the exact same fashion style. I suspect they’re brothers. Just…a YEAR!? I never saw them in the same room fOR A WHOLE YEAR!!!?
Just got back from an evening playing magic at my LGS and felt the need to get something off my chest.
I don’t play much magic these days, certainly not as much as I would like to, because I’m only really happy playing EDH with friends. Give me a good prerelease, or even a simple draft, and I’m happy to rock up to a new store and get stuck in. These events are well structured, with clear start times and match pairings, everyone has access to the same kind of pool of cards, and everyone understands that the goal is to win. With casual EDH games? Not so much.
So here are the 5 times I have tried to play Commander with strangers, what happened and what I learnt.
1] My first ever game I had just discovered EDH, and had eagerly sleeved up a Niv-Mizzet deck from whatever random draft chaff and junk rares I had lying around. My passion for the dragon parun is well documented, but I had no concept of what I was doing. I went to my then-LGS, and sat down with a random person to play this new format.
I don’t remember what his deck was exactly. The first thing I remember is that he played Tolarian Academy, I card I had never heard of but seemed quite good. Still, I persevered. I managed to get up to 6 mana and excitedly cast Niv.
He cast Hinder.
Fine, I thought, and got ready to put Niv-Mizzet back in the Command Zone (actually Exile at the time). But then my opponent told me that it got put to the bottom of my library, and I couldn’t put it into the command zone instead.
I got really angry and frustrated, with what seemed like breaking the rules of Commander, and, perhaps needless to say, was easily crushed.
What I learned - tuck is REALLY bad for Commander. I remembered this game when the discussions were going on about the removal of tuck from EDH, and just how crushed and cheated I felt. Had it not been for my friends getting into the format, I may never have gone back.
2] My first win I kept working on Niv, and came back to try my luck again, this time getting into a 4-player game. I have no recollection of what everyone else was playing (their decks were significantly more powerful than my own). All I remember is that after a player or two had been knocked out, I drew my copy of Ophidian Eye, played it on Niv-Mizzet and won the game.
“Oh, I haven’t seen that combo before” said my nice-guy opponent, as he scooped up his cards.
What I learned - infinite combos are disappointing ways to win. After I won the game I felt good for a second, but then I just felt kind of empty. I hadn’t earned that win with either good deck building or good gameplay, I had stolen it from nowhere. To this day I actively remove all infinite combos from my decks - they just aren’t fun for me.
3] So sorry! Not everyone feels the same way I do about infinite combos however. My next game with strangers was a random pickup game at the M13 prerelease. I sat down with a couple of people waiting for the sealed event to start, and we played a very quick round of EDH.
I say very quick because one of opponents quickly ramped up to an entwined Tooth and Nail, and searched out a two card combo that instantly won the game. One of the cards was Lich Lord of Unx, and I’m pretty sure the other was Palinchron, with some kind of mana doubler on the table. Infinite mana meant we were all milled out.
And then my opponent apologised for winning like that.
And I said to him - “don’t feel sorry, just don’t play those cards”.
What I learned - EDH means different things to different people. Combo isn’t my cup of tea but I’m glad it’s there for playgroups and people that love it. But I do object to you not following through with your choices. If you put in an infinite combo, and then tutor it out, at least have the good grace to enjoy yourself. And if you don’t like it, remember that no one forced you to make those choices.
4] Taking all the turns We now turn to more recent events. I went buy to an LGS for some pickup games, knowing that I was late for the published start time. One game was in full swing, and two other EDH players were waiting for a game - kind of. They were hoping for a game after eating some dinner, playing some computer games and chatting. So I hung around.
For about 45 minutes.
And no one asked my name, or said anything to me at all.
Eventually, the three of us start playing a game. I bring out a new Vorel artifact counters deck I’ve been working on, that is very casual.
My first opponent chuckles to himself that he has just finished putting together his Meren Stax deck so that no one else will be able to play any magic. My other opponent lays down Jeleva, and on the 5th turn or so proceeds to take turn after turn with every time warp card in the game, eventually going infinite.
At that point I had played about three cards and had at least one of them destroyed.
And still no one knew my name.
What I learned - It is a sad fact of playing with strangers in LGS’s, that many of the players are not up on their social graces. They need to be forced into chatting and introducing themselves. But I also learnt the importance of trying to gauge what we all wanted from the game before we started. Had I realised that they were bringing guns, I might not have brought a knife. Actually, I don’t have any gun level decks, so maybe we would have just not bothered.
5] When I realised this wasn’t going to work And that gets me to this evening, and the reason for the post. I went to another LGS to try some pickup games, and forced myself into a conversation. Eventually a game gets going.
Game one turned into an 8 player Kingdom game, where there are various hidden roles. I literally can’t see what 4 of the players are doing at all. The entirety of what I played in this game was my commander, Intet, before a player at the other end of the table combo killed the King with an Alesha deck. This game took half an hour, and I played one card.
We then played a 4 player game, and I ended up with the more casual gamers, playing 3 mono green decks. Much more my speed, though some variety of colours would have been nice. One player, with a modified Freyalise precon deck, went turn 1 Sol Ring into turn 2 Priest of Titania, and spewed a huge number of Elves on the table. No one had any removal, I did my best to pressure this guy but no one else was doing anything. He swung at me twice and I died.
Fair enough. I just realised that, even with similarly powered decks, I wasn’t enjoying myself.
What I learned - I don’t like playing casual games with strangers. Just to be clear, I’m pretty sure these were good people, I just didn’t enjoy the conversation around the games, or the time spent hanging out. If I lived nearer that might be one thing, but it takes an hour each way. 2 hours of travel for 1 hour of playing magic, when I’m really not enjoying myself just isn’t worth it. Maybe if I stuck with it and went every week, but I just don’t have the time to commit.
So I’m left with my magic playing friends all in other countries, and having no local playgroup that I want to play cards with. So why am I spending money on magic cards again?
How can I break into, or create, a better playgroup for myself? How can I learn to play with strangers?
My homophobic mother, who is throwing my sister a rainbow themed baby shower, shopping at target: wow! how lucky we are that they have all this rainbow decor out for the summer!
Me, eyeing the #takepride tags on the target items in the cart: yeah of course
People think of children as either sweet and innocent or too stupid to cause much trouble and both views are wrong. A child of elementary school age has the moral reasoning and impulse control of a racoon paired with problem solving equal to or superior to an adult’s, yet unbound by the shackles of cautionary experience or awareness of long-term consequence.
This is what allows the children to both create a black market in live bioweapons while still only valuing said weapons at 25 cents.
today was a coffee-with-lots-of-whipped-cream kind of day. it was a wake-up—almost-late—for-work morning, and a run——back from lunch sort of evening. starbucks employees were kind enough to remake my (typo’d) drink. gamestop employee, wonderful horny friend she is, saw my necromanced beverage and gushed in request for one. (being the simp that i am, i handed her one six minutes later.) that same thirty minute-lunch-break i bought two bras for $19 and i’m elated {it’s a big deal} about it still. did i mention i used to work in italian lingerie. same store. the district manager was helping me with my items, neither of us yet aware that her team had fired me after a series of unsolved store thefts. she tried hiring me during checkout (she introduced herself right there and then) because i’d be a perfect match for the store - personable and sweet, compulsively driven to know about Niche Bra Things. boy oh boy. oy. don’t you know it. after work i drove with a friend to grab shrimp fried rice and korean fried chicken, talking about work, about moving jobs, about financing a car. now i have to yelp review (sigh) the dang joint because (sigh) food there slaps. late that evening we went to a cafe with two takeout boxes of chicken, ordering ice cream and tiramisu. now it’s nighttime and i’m getting cold, daydreaming about putting on a shirt and having a pair of warm, perfect-to-hold hands do it for me.
waiting at an airport trying to catch back-to-back canceled flights for four days now. we’re tired and miss home. that being said: the midnight hotel front desk guys who can’t help their playful sarcasm with me can get it wet and sloppy anytime
“oh there’s no microwave miss. i’m afraid you’ll have to reheat your takeout on the clothing iron.”
(pause. smiles) “just kidding! there’s a microwave in your room below the tv. it’s a pain to locate; not many people know about it. let me know if you have any problems and you can come back here so i can personally reheat whatever you want right here.” (pats table.) (there’s probably a microwave behind the counter.)
yesterday my date made me promise to “not talk to any random russians this time” only for me to immediately become best friends with a kosovan gang member. saved on a technicality
after i successfully taught him how to play uno via google translate i explained to him that my date’s phone got stolen, prompting both the most threatening AND the most hilarious sentence ever typed into a translator:
“why did you have to promise that you won’t talk to russian people in in first place” because after a certain amount of alcohol i enter a stage of inebriation my friends have dubbed “russian hour” in which the duolingo trained part of my brain takes over and i sniff out russian speaking people like a bloodhound and exitedly talk to them until i am physically dragged away.
In middle school biology, we did an experiment. We were given yams, which we would sprout in cups of water. We then had to make hypotheses about how the yams would grow, based on descriptions of yam plants in our books, and make notes of our observations as they grew.
Here’s what was supposed to happen: we were supposed to see that the actual growth of the plant did not resemble our hypotheses. We were then supposed to figure out that these were, in fact, sweet potatoes.
What actually happened was that every single student in every single class lied in their notes so that their observations perfectly matched their hypotheses. See, everyone assumed the mismatch meant they had done something wrong in the process of growing the plant or that they had misunderstood the dichotomous key or the plant identification terminology. And, thanks to the wonders of a public school education, everyone assumed the wrong results would get us a failing grade. We were trying to pass. We didn’t want to get bitched out by the teacher. Curiosity, learning, science - that had nothing to do with why we were sitting in that classroom. So we all lied.
The teacher was furious.She tried to fail every student, but the administration stepped in and told her she wasn’t allowed to because a 100% fail rate is recognized as a failure of the teacher, not the class. It wasn’t even her fault, really, though her being a notorious hard-ass didn’t help. It was a failure of the entire educational system.
So whenever I see crap like Elizabeth Holmes’s blood test scam or pharmaceutical trials which are unable to be replicated or industry-funded research that reaches wildly unscientific conclusions, I just remember those fucking sweet potatoes. I remember that curiosity dies when people are just trying to give their superiors the “right” answers, so they can get the grade, get the job, get the paycheck. It’s not about truth when it’s about paying rent. There’s no scientific integrity if you can’t control for human desperation.
“There’s no scientific integrity if you can’t control for human desperation.”
I recently saw a new psychiatrist. He took me off Effexor and Rexulti and put me on Prozac. He said the side effect profile of prozac isn’t bad. (He doesn’t know how sensitive I am.) I started Prozac a couple days before school, and let me tell you, I am going through hell. Nausea, stomach pain, soreness, overheating, headache.
First day of school on Tuesday. I started the morning by vomiting repeatedly. Then, while walking to class, a car turning right on red didn’t see me. Rolled into me, smacked me pretty good. I’m very thankful he didn’t hit the gas, but I wish the [redacted] had at least glanced in my direction after he literally almost ran me over. Later that day, I miss a step on a staircase and twist my ankle. Not too bad so whatever. Not two steps later, my ankle gives out and I fall down a flight of stairs.
Felt everything this morning, Wednesday. Wanted to die for multiple reasons. Gulped down some Tylenol and promptly fell back asleep. My classes don’t start til 11:20, which is good because my alarm didn’t go off. I was nearly crying by my first class.
Then, my next class made it worth everything.
Aural rehabilitation. I love it so much. Everything we’re going to do, every story she told. Guys, this is what I want to do with my life. I’m so happy to have found the love of my life in audiology.
Tl;dr - keep going. The worst day is still only 24 hours long. Things can and will be better.
i had the amazing opportunity to commission a painting of Arkem and Dorn from yolebrat. it turned out beyond incredible, and they were an absolute joy to work with. please check out their art.
i also wrote a fic to accompany the piece, you can read it here.
Dorn shrugged, twisting to take a look at the gash still oozing blood. “I want to have a scar to remember today’s battle by.” He ran his fingers over the wound almost reverently.
Amused, Arkem raised his hand, nodding in the direction of Dorn’s shoulder. “I am no priest of Ilmater, Dorn.” As if to add weight to his statement, purple magic began to pool in his palm. “My healing won’t erase the damage, but it can close the wound.” His fingertips tingled with magical essence. “But if you’d rather die from an infection in some ditch on the way to Baldur’s Gate, I will respect your decision,” he smiled, fixing his companion with an expectant stare.
once i got another kids number (for friending purposes), sent one text confirming my identity, then accidentally ghosted them for more than half the school year before in person apologizing to them and they said ‘oh i forgot i had your number’
Over the summer there’s always mutual accidental ghosting between me and all my friends, whereas during the school year people share my number with everyone my number and so I get texts like this
Have an art teacher who is putting you down for drawing MANGA /ANIME? I went through that, and HERE is how I put my teacher in his place! No joke, young artists NEED to watch this!! #BeConfident
If you follow our networking page for the Devore cats: https://www.facebook.com/KittyDevoreRescueNetwork/ you may recognize Antigone. She is a woe begotten, pregnant kitty who found herself not only in the shelter but on the daily euthanasia list.
A rescue partner stepped up for her and we sent our puller. As our puller arrived at the scene Antigone had Anti-Gone into full labor and delivered a kitten on her way to the foster. This was an unusual situation for even an experienced rescuer, but we’re happy to say she has delivered adorable baby #2 and is all set up at her foster’s house. Our rescue head has said “Every pull is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get…” but our network was collectively surprised she decided to go into labor right before the “pull”. Haha.
January kittens!? You bet. It’s sadly always kitten season in socal. Always remember to spay and neuter!!! Join us @ Kittydevorerescue.org to save some kitties in 2018!
Here are the official rescue efforts for Antigone if you’re inclined to help offset costs for a very… unique transport:
RESCUE EFFORTS UNDERWAY FOR MOMMA ANTIGONE WHO IS IN LABOR!!! KITTY DEVORE RESCUE HAS PULLED THIS LOVELY GIRL WHO IS ON HER WAY TO HER FOSTER HOME ! A rescue partner has stepped up for her! Anyone wishing to help with vetting & transportation costs, please go to the paypal donation link below paypal account is: [email protected]
