Summary:Joining the Avengers wasn’t on your plans. Not until Steve asked you to help his best friend. Bucky was Bucky, but the Winter Soldier still came from time ti time, bringing with him chaos and destruction. And you was supposed to keep that side of him away… But what happens when both Bucky and the Winter Soldier start to enjoy your company more than anyone else? Should you turn your back on the Soldier, ignore his own fears and traumas? That’s exactly what everyone wants. But you were never known for following orders…
×
“Stark called me again.” You say, a cup of tea still half full and warm in your hands. “Guess why.”
“Recruitment.” Steve sighs, putting the empty bowl of cereal on the coffee table next to his feet.
“Yup. He came with the ‘hello, how are you? How’s your job, how’s your paycheck, blah blah blah, wanna join us?’ ” Rolling your eyes, you pull your legs over, folding them under you. “Same thing as always.”
“He cares, (Y/N),” Steve says, turning the TV volume down. “On his own way, but he cares… But… Actually, (Y/N), I’ve been wanting to ask you to accept Stark’s for a different reason.”
Pinching your eyebrows together, you move to the kitchen island, sitting on the stool. “Different reason?”
“Yeah.” He heavily sighs, glancing at you before focusing on the dishes again. “You know we’re having problems with Bucky. Well… With his other side.”
“Wait.” You nervously chuckle. “You want to set me up with Barnes?” Steve’s friendship with Bucky is well known to you. They’re like brothers, and you, having the same feeling towards Steve, have the exact idea how that must feel. If it was Steve suffering from this, you’d be heartbroken. “I don’t see how I could be of any help.”
“It wasn’t my idea, not originally. The Hulk only calmed down after Banner got closer to Nat.”
“So you are trying to set me up with Barnes.” You don’t have much contact with him. You met him twice when Steve managed to make him go out and you were there too. But that was it.
“I trust you. And Bucky knows I trust you. I just think having someone by his side could help somehow.”
“Doesn’t he have the other Avengers?”
“He feels guilty because of what The Winter Soldier did to them. They’re there to help, of course, but he holds back, isolates himself. Not as much as before, but still.”
“And you think I could help him how?” Shrugging your shoulders, you wonder if you could do it. But that would also mean finally joining the Avengers. So there’s that.
“If you manage to befriend him, I think it would be enough.”
“You think tiny, little me will be enough to keep the Winter Soldier away.”
×
“What’s up, Barnes?” You ask, sitting next to him, a leg on each side of the bench as you sit sideways, facing him. “I heard the punchbag crying, you should give it a break.”
Bucky smiles a little before looking at you. “Hello, miss–”
“(Y/N).” You cut him off, pointing your bottle at him. “Call me (Y/N).”
“Call me Bucky.” He says, nodding his head. “So Steve managed to finally convince you to join the Avengers.”
“He did. But only because I was given a special mission.” Nobody intended on keeping this a secret. Bucky needs to know you care, you and Steve. “I’m here to help you.”
He furrows his eyebrows, shrugging his shoulders. “Help me? How so?”
“I–”
“Tell me it’s not about the other guy, (Y/N).” He moves to stand up, but you hold his arm, keeping him from going anywhere. “This is dangerous. I can’t believe Steve brought you into this.”
“Steve is worried about you. And it’s not like I’ll… Do something. I’m just here to… Offer you my friendship and stand by you, no matter what.” Bucky sighs, shaking his head. But he sits down again, looking at the floor. “And well, I’m with the Avengers now. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Just stay away when… He… Comes out.” Bucky says in a low, sad voice.
×
“Who are you?”
The voice, low and deep, but at the same time way too loud, breaks the silence and startles you, making your blood run cold for a second. You push the fridge door close in your desperation, eyes quickly moving to the source of the sound. There’s a figure seated on the edge of the table, alone in the dark. The only thing that helps you recognize him is the ray of blueish light that illuminates his shoulder and chest.
“Damn it, Bucky. You scared the hell out of me.” You whisper, a hand on your heart. “What are you doing here in the dark?”
“Who are you?” He asks again, and you just don’t follow.
Squinting your eyes, you tilt your head to the side a little. “Is it a joke? Like a knock-knock joke? Because I don’t get it. You should–”
You’re still speaking when he abruptly stands up, and that’s when it clicks.
Bucky doesn’t speak like this. Bucky doesn’t behave like this. Bucky doesn’t walk up to you like he’s ready to take you down.
“W-wait.” You mutter, raising a hand at him. As if it could stop him. Your eyes fall on the knife holder, but since your fighting reflexes weren’t mastered yet, he moves at the same time you do, blocking your way.
“I won’t ask a third time,” Bucky says, and the lower tone of his voice scares you. But it’s even worse when he takes a knife.
“Shit.” You mumble, slowly moving backward. Then it happens suddenly. He catches up to you, violently pushing you against the wall. A yelp leaves your lips when his metal arm lies on your chest, metal hand with a firm grip of your shoulder as his forearm presses your collarbones. It feels like he’s a rock that fell on you, making it impossible to move. “Bucky, please–”
“I’m not Bucky.” He barks, and you feel the blade against your side, right on your ribs.
“No, you’re not.” You tell him, talking fast. “You’re the Soldier.” To that, he tilts his head to the side a little, his eyes set on yours as the man towers over you. “And I swear I mean no harm.” Grinding your teeth at the pain, you wonder if he could break your collarbone or dislocate your shoulder. But you try to remain calm, slowly raising both your hands, showing him you have no gun, no weapon, nothing. “Soldiers don’t kill unarmed, defenseless women.”
“I do if I’m given the order.”
Breathing deeply, you weakly nod. “But you have no orders.” A red, floating circle gets your attention, and your eyes move from Bucky to the rectangular screen on the wall. Tony’s AI is watching. “F.R.I.D.A.Y. isolate the kitchen. Security protocol number seven.”
“Are you sure, miss (Y/N)?” He asks.
“Yes, I am.” You assure him, and you only listen as the metal doors are closed, locking you and the Winter Soldier alone.
“What are you doing?” He asks in a low voice, stepping closer to you until his whole body is pushing you against the wall, eyes never leaving yours. As if you’re some imminent threat that he needs to be aware of at all times.
Summary:Joining the Avengers wasn’t on your plans. Not until Steve asked you to help his best friend. Bucky was Bucky, but the Winter Soldier still came from time ti time, bringing with him chaos and destruction. And you was supposed to keep that side of him away… But what happens when both Bucky and the Winter Soldier start to enjoy your company more than anyone else? Should you turn your back on the Soldier, ignore his own fears and traumas? That’s exactly what everyone wants. But you were never known for following orders…
×
“Stark called me again.” You say, a cup of tea still half full and warm in your hands. “Guess why.”
“Recruitment.” Steve sighs, putting the empty bowl of cereal on the coffee table next to his feet.
“Yup. He came with the ‘hello, how are you? How’s your job, how’s your paycheck, blah blah blah, wanna join us?’ ” Rolling your eyes, you pull your legs over, folding them under you. “Same thing as always.”
“He cares, (Y/N),” Steve says, turning the TV volume down. “On his own way, but he cares… But… Actually, (Y/N), I’ve been wanting to ask you to accept Stark’s for a different reason.”
Pinching your eyebrows together, you move to the kitchen island, sitting on the stool. “Different reason?”
“Yeah.” He heavily sighs, glancing at you before focusing on the dishes again. “You know we’re having problems with Bucky. Well… With his other side.”
“Wait.” You nervously chuckle. “You want to set me up with Barnes?” Steve’s friendship with Bucky is well known to you. They’re like brothers, and you, having the same feeling towards Steve, have the exact idea how that must feel. If it was Steve suffering from this, you’d be heartbroken. “I don’t see how I could be of any help.”
“It wasn’t my idea, not originally. The Hulk only calmed down after Banner got closer to Nat.”
“So you are trying to set me up with Barnes.” You don’t have much contact with him. You met him twice when Steve managed to make him go out and you were there too. But that was it.
“I trust you. And Bucky knows I trust you. I just think having someone by his side could help somehow.”
“Doesn’t he have the other Avengers?”
“He feels guilty because of what The Winter Soldier did to them. They’re there to help, of course, but he holds back, isolates himself. Not as much as before, but still.”
“And you think I could help him how?” Shrugging your shoulders, you wonder if you could do it. But that would also mean finally joining the Avengers. So there’s that.
“If you manage to befriend him, I think it would be enough.”
“You think tiny, little me will be enough to keep the Winter Soldier away.”
×
“What’s up, Barnes?” You ask, sitting next to him, a leg on each side of the bench as you sit sideways, facing him. “I heard the punchbag crying, you should give it a break.”
Bucky smiles a little before looking at you. “Hello, miss–”
“(Y/N).” You cut him off, pointing your bottle at him. “Call me (Y/N).”
“Call me Bucky.” He says, nodding his head. “So Steve managed to finally convince you to join the Avengers.”
“He did. But only because I was given a special mission.” Nobody intended on keeping this a secret. Bucky needs to know you care, you and Steve. “I’m here to help you.”
He furrows his eyebrows, shrugging his shoulders. “Help me? How so?”
“I–”
“Tell me it’s not about the other guy, (Y/N).” He moves to stand up, but you hold his arm, keeping him from going anywhere. “This is dangerous. I can’t believe Steve brought you into this.”
“Steve is worried about you. And it’s not like I’ll… Do something. I’m just here to… Offer you my friendship and stand by you, no matter what.” Bucky sighs, shaking his head. But he sits down again, looking at the floor. “And well, I’m with the Avengers now. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Just stay away when… He… Comes out.” Bucky says in a low, sad voice.
×
“Who are you?”
The voice, low and deep, but at the same time way too loud, breaks the silence and startles you, making your blood run cold for a second. You push the fridge door close in your desperation, eyes quickly moving to the source of the sound. There’s a figure seated on the edge of the table, alone in the dark. The only thing that helps you recognize him is the ray of blueish light that illuminates his shoulder and chest.
“Damn it, Bucky. You scared the hell out of me.” You whisper, a hand on your heart. “What are you doing here in the dark?”
“Who are you?” He asks again, and you just don’t follow.
Squinting your eyes, you tilt your head to the side a little. “Is it a joke? Like a knock-knock joke? Because I don’t get it. You should–”
You’re still speaking when he abruptly stands up, and that’s when it clicks.
Bucky doesn’t speak like this. Bucky doesn’t behave like this. Bucky doesn’t walk up to you like he’s ready to take you down.
“W-wait.” You mutter, raising a hand at him. As if it could stop him. Your eyes fall on the knife holder, but since your fighting reflexes weren’t mastered yet, he moves at the same time you do, blocking your way.
“I won’t ask a third time,” Bucky says, and the lower tone of his voice scares you. But it’s even worse when he takes a knife.
“Shit.” You mumble, slowly moving backward. Then it happens suddenly. He catches up to you, violently pushing you against the wall. A yelp leaves your lips when his metal arm lies on your chest, metal hand with a firm grip of your shoulder as his forearm presses your collarbones. It feels like he’s a rock that fell on you, making it impossible to move. “Bucky, please–”
“I’m not Bucky.” He barks, and you feel the blade against your side, right on your ribs.
“No, you’re not.” You tell him, talking fast. “You’re the Soldier.” To that, he tilts his head to the side a little, his eyes set on yours as the man towers over you. “And I swear I mean no harm.” Grinding your teeth at the pain, you wonder if he could break your collarbone or dislocate your shoulder. But you try to remain calm, slowly raising both your hands, showing him you have no gun, no weapon, nothing. “Soldiers don’t kill unarmed, defenseless women.”
“I do if I’m given the order.”
Breathing deeply, you weakly nod. “But you have no orders.” A red, floating circle gets your attention, and your eyes move from Bucky to the rectangular screen on the wall. Tony’s AI is watching. “F.R.I.D.A.Y. isolate the kitchen. Security protocol number seven.”
“Are you sure, miss (Y/N)?” He asks.
“Yes, I am.” You assure him, and you only listen as the metal doors are closed, locking you and the Winter Soldier alone.
“What are you doing?” He asks in a low voice, stepping closer to you until his whole body is pushing you against the wall, eyes never leaving yours. As if you’re some imminent threat that he needs to be aware of at all times.
Summary:You’re a HYDRA assassin that’s worked closely with the Winter Soldier, to each of your dismay you’re reunited with Bucky after the blip.
A/N:SMUT! This was supposed to be plot but it’s genuinely just smut and fluff oops. Enjoy it while it lasts because its about to get so fucking sad lol. Anyways thanks everyone for being so supportive towards the series!
“You speak about (Y/N) in a very loving way. Did you ever have a physical or romantic relationship with her?” Bucky’s therapist questioned.
He paused. That part of his relationship felt private to him. It felt like only he and (Y/N) should know. It was never about anyone else, no one else had ever known what they had. He didn’t feel at liberty to share.
“It’s not something I want to talk about.” He avoided eye contact as he replied.
“Why is that?”
“After SHIELD and HYRDA’s secrets were leaked to the world, it felt like everyone could get their hands on whatever information they wanted about me, (Y/N)’s information too. The stuff we shared with each other is the only private life I have left. I don’t feel like telling anyone about it.” Bucky explained. Dr Raynor nodded comfortingly. As much as she wanted too, she didn’t push it.
Moscow
2013
Your tits were shoved up against the cold concrete wall of the shower. Bucky’s cut abs were pushed into your back, his hands firmly holding your hips in place as he buried his cock into you. The warm trickling of water down your nude frame only heightened your senses to what was happening in your core. Bucky’s grunts were muffled by your sharp moans.
“Holy fuck, baby!” You groaned, feeling yourself tighten around him. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum!” One of your hands held against the wet wall in front of you, and the other clenched Bucky’s real hand at your waist.
The dark pit in your stomach was winding into a tight knot, an influx of little stars pecked at the corners of your vision. Bucky was relentless, he had worlds of stamina and was stronger than he realised.
You squeezed your eyes shut as you let your orgasm pulse through you. Bucky felt your knees weakening, his hands held harder around your hips to keep you in place.
“Please don’t stop,” you whined,
You could practically feel the smirk on Bucky’s lips, “want me to speed up, darling?” he growled, thrusting himself harder inside you. You unravelled on him, your abdomen tensing while your eyes squeezed shut. Pure bliss pounded through your veins while you came all over Bucky’s thick member.
A string of curse words fell from your mouth, stifling Bucky’s deep grunts.
He slowed down as you mellowed from your high, gently pulling his cock out of your core. His hands on your waist turned your frame to face him.
“God, you’re so fucking beautiful.” He murmured, his lips falling down to connect with yours. The kiss was tantalizing and smooth. Bucky’s hands softly trailed down to your plump ass. He swiftly lifted you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist.
One of your hands moved to tangle your fingers into the hair at the back of his head, pulling it slightly to move his face away from yours. He smirked at you, taking in your gorgeous features. Your other hand slipped between your bodies to wrap around his length, it was slick with your wetness. You jerked it slowly, watching Bucky bite down on his lip.
You lined him up with your entrance and he pushed himself inside. You let slip a heavenly moan.
He began slowly thrusting again, his hands firmly gripping your as to hold your body steadily up against the shower wall. His member pushed deeply inside you with every movement Bucky made. You clawed against his shoulder blades, his body now pressed tightly up against yours.
You knew you were close again, the knot in your stomach never having the chance to unravel. Your walls clench around him, your legs shaky and tense.
“Fucking hell,” you groaned, arching your back against the concrete. Your head fell back with closed eyes, not being able to focus on anything other than the sheer ecstasy pulsing through your body with every thrust.
Bucky was close too, but you knew he wouldn’t finish until you did again. He took pride in knowing how intensely he could pleasure you.
Your moans echoed through the shower, still encapsulated by the rich feeling of hot water falling along your body. Without warning, you let go. Your hands grabbed at Bucky’s muscled back, your body shaking and tightening as your high hit you like a wave. You couldn’t even think, all you could feel was euphoria. Bucky didn’t hesitate, his pounding thrusts became sloppy and uneven, his fingers clenched hard against the delicate skin of your ass. With one last growl he filled you up, his toned figure tense against yours.
You both took a moment, heaving breaths in time with each other. Your hearts racing at the same pace. He would no doubt recover before you could.
Bucky moved first, slipping himself out of you and gently lowering your feet to the floor. His velvet lips left a trail of kisses across your sensitive collarbone.
“Come stay with me tonight.” You painted, your fingers tangled into his wet, dark hair.
“If we get caught-” Bucky began, speaking against the rich skin of your neck,
“How would we get caught? We’re two of the stealthiest assassins in the world.”
His head dragged up to meet yours, his gaze focused on your delicate, pink lips.
“Well, when you put it that way,” he smiled, leaning in for the hundredth kiss of the night.
~
The early amber sun seeped through your blinds like fresh honey through beeswax. It softly pulled you from your peaceful slumber. You couldn’t help but listen to the soft snores of the man next to you. Bucky took up most of the bed space with his huge frame. You cuddled up next to him, admiring how the light entangled in his brunette locks.
Bucky lay sleeping on his stomach, his real arm stretched out to rest over your nude body. He looked comfortable with the duvet pooled around his waist. You’d crept in on him in his room a few times before, he’d always be sleeping on the ground, with nothing but an old blanket. It didn’t seem like something he wanted to talk about, or something he even knew how to talk about. He’d always just say his ‘bed was too soft’. But now, in your bed, he was content.
You shuffled your body closer to his, watching him as he stirred slightly. He didn’t seem ready to get up. Rolling onto his side to face you, you were able to snuggle into his warm chest. His arm instinctively embraced you, his huge frame engulfing yours.
You’d never felt the need to feel safe, you always carried weapons, you were highly skilled, immensely trained. No one in their right mind would try anything on you. But Bucky, your snowman, he made you feel secure. He finally made you feel like you had something worth living for. It was such an obscure feeling to you, it almost felt daunting. Like you finally had something to lose. You wondered if this is what love felt like.
“Stop thinking.” He grumbled, his morning voice raspy.
“That’s difficult when I have such a big, smart brain.” You giggled, your hand moving to push a piece of his long hair from his face.
“Yea, I love that big, smart brain.” He replied, his large hand moving down your back to squeeze your ass.
You looked at his resting face, his eyes hadn’t opened yet. His soft features remained relaxed while his hand stroked along your back.
“Did you dream last night?” You pondered, quietly.
“No.” He replied, remaining in his position of rest. “Did you?”
“Mhm,” you started, “I dreamt about the ocean.”
“Was it a good dream?”
“Yea. I could smell the salty water, and feel the hot sand. It was loud, the crashing waves seemed violent, but it was peaceful. I’ve never been to the beach though,” you rolled over slightly to stare at the ceiling. “Darling,” you added, “have you ever thought about escaping?”
This pulled Bucky’s eyes open, “escape?”
“Escape from this life? Leave HYDRA, be normal people.” You explained, barely above a whisper. Letting your thoughts fall onto the sheets.
“Do you think you can be a normal person?” He inquired.
You paused. All you’d known your whole life was HYDRA. All you’d ever done was assassinate and infiltrate. You’d never had to a cook a meal, do taxes, mow a lawn. But the human part of you always wanted too.
“I guess not.”
Bucky looked over at you with soft eyes. “I don’t remember being a normal person either.” He added, as an attempt at comforting you.
“Were you ever a normal person?” you questioned,
“I think so. I think I lived in New York for a while. Sometimes I have patchy memories about what I think was my old life, and my old friends.” He cracked a faint smile.
“Did you see her much after that mission?” Dr Raynor asked Bucky. She seemed interested in (Y/N).
“Yea. I saw her in passing a few times. She spent a lot of time at the base I was at. Sometimes I’d be out of cryo for weeks on a mission. That’s when I saw her the most.”
“What did you do together?”
“Played card games, trained together, built weapons, I taught her how to snipe. Normal shit, I guess.” It felt strange thinking about it all. It felt like a different lifetime to him.
“I guess that is somewhat normal for trained assassins. Did you tell her anything about yourself? After she explained her story, did you reciprocate that?” His therapist questioned.
“I couldn’t. I didn’t really remember that much about myself. Everything I knew was wiped, I was pretty much a blank slate. I couldn’t even tell her my name because I didn’t know it.” Bucky shrugged.
“What did she call you then?”
“She gave me a nickname. Snegovik. It means snowman in Russian. She thought it was hilarious, because I was the Winter Soldier. If anyone else called me snowman I would’ve snapped their necks, but when she did it-“ Bucky paused to think, “It felt nice.”
Moscow
2012
“What’re you doing, snegovik? (snowman)” You placed yourself down at the table opposite Bucky. He looked up at you, his pale blue eyes gazing into yours. You noticed Bucky started looking differently at you as you spent more time together. Instead of a look of hostility or annoyance as he gave to everyone else, it was a gentle look. A look you would give birds dancing in a fountain on a warm day, or a look you would give the sun as it rose so smoothly over the snowy mountains.
“Reading.” He shut the file laid out in front of him. The maroon file had a black HYDRA symbol resting in the middle. It was his next target.
“I haven’t had a case in weeks. I’m bored out of my mind. Do you wanna go to the firing range with me?” You queried. The HYDRA base you were currently stuck at had one of the largest firing ranges down in the basement, with a very fun collection of weaponry.
“I know what we can do. Let’s go snezhinka. (snowflake)” Bucky pushed up against the table to stand, he grabbed his file and walked off. You quickly followed behind.
The two of you ended up in a large room full of dark grey lockers. It was an empty, dusty smelling room. Not many agents or assassins resided at this base so it was mostly desolate.
Bucky pulled a few lockers open, his metal fingers clanking against the steel lockers. He tossed a large coat towards you. It was black with a soft fur lining the hood.
“Put that on.” He demanded.
“Are we going outside?” You asked, tossing the coat over your shoulders and zipping up the front.
“Mhm.” Bucky pulled his sniper rifle out of a locker. It was already put together. He grabbed a small, red box of ammunition and an extra scope. He walked off again, he tended to do that.
You waltzed off behind him.
“Don’t you need a coat too?”
“No. I’m the snowman, remember?” He smirked back at you. Bucky didn’t smile very often, you always tried to savour the moments that he did.
The two of you exited the compound through a side door, it simply led out into the snowy forest. He began walking out into the snow, along a path he’d obviously walked plenty of times before. The large pines that inhabited the forest were covered in a layer of thick snow. The reminisce of grass and flowers barely poked through the large sheet of white on the ground.
Bucky’s path guided to a small, wooden sniper nest. It was an old sniper range that used to be for protecting the base. As more enhanced people began showing up, HYDRA moved to using giant concrete bunkers instead.
Bucky threw down a thin, dark green blanket and lay down on his stomach. He quickly set up his sniper rifle and adjusted the scope.
“Lie down.” He asserted. You complied, lying down on your stomach next to him. There was nearly no room between your bodies, the sniper nest seemed like it was only made for one. His body radiated heat like a fire. So much for snowman, you thought. Bucky lined up the spare scope and passed it over to you.
“Look through that.”
You stared through the small scope, it showed a few trees over two kilometres away. “What am I looking for?” You asked, quietly.
Bucky didn’t reply. The sound of the silenced sniper announced, and a single pinecone burst into pieces. You turned from the scope to look at the man next to you. “That was 2,000 meters away, holy shit.”
“2,248 meters.” He added, lifting the sniper to sit in front of you. “Your turn.”
“I told you, snegovik, I can’t snipe. I’ve never been good at it.”
“I’ll teach you.” He took the spare scope from your hand. “Get nice and close to the gun, your shoulder should be up against this part,” he motioned to the back end of the rifle, you shuffled so you were in place, “look through the scope,” you did as he instructed, “and here,” his hand grabbed your wrist, the cool metal of his fingers burnt against your hand. You didn’t know much about how his metal arm worked, but he seemed to have amazing control over it. He was so gentle as directed your hand to a dial near the scope, “use this to adjust your sight. Take it to 500 metres out, we’ll start off easy.”
You adjusted the scope. 500m. You agilely moved to line up with a large pine cone resting on one of the giant pine trees.
“Deep breath.” Bucky said lightly, “fire.”
Your finger snapped down the trigger and the bullet flew. Bucky watched through his own scope as the bullet hit its target.
“I did it!” You announced,
“You’re not as bad as you thought.” He smiled, “go further out and try again.”
You and Bucky sat in that tiny sniper nest shooting pinecones for hours.
~
Bucky left early that morning for his mission, leaving you at the base by yourself for a few days. You spent most of those days shooting and you spent your nights combat training. Unsurprisingly, you’d developed some severe insomnia. In your line of work it wasn’t uncommon. Kraken didn’t want you to take any sort of sleeping medication that the HYDRA doctors suggested because he was afraid it would affect your work ethic. He wanted you staying sharp. Arguably, running off no sleep didn’t have you very sharp.
It was another regular night. 2, maybe 3 in the morning, you were in the gym, giving everything you had to a black punching bag. Your bandaged knuckles were feeling the force with every blow. You tiring body felt shaken under the strenuous training you were putting yourself through.
“It’s a bit late for this, snezhikna.” A deep voice announced from the entrance of the gym. You turned to see a muscular figure. He was covered in black clothing, only revealing his face and his large metallic arm. Not many people were able to sneak up on you, except Bucky, he always could.
“How was the mission?” You returned to your punching bag.
“The target was eliminated.” You heard the faint sound of his boots approaching. By the time you spun around he was directly behind you. “Let’s spar. It doesn’t look like that bag’s putting up much of a fight.”
He moved towards the thin gym mats. You watched as he adjusted his arm, each metal part whirring into place. You unravelled your knuckles, standing on the mat opposite him. The two of you stared in silence for a moment, the tension between you hung like a heavy, black smoke. A vicious grin flicked along your mouth and you began.
Punches were met with dodges, kicks were defended with blocks. You ducked, grabbed his metal wrist and pinned it behind him. He adjusted and threw your body over the top of him. You landed hard on the ground. He smiled. You whipped around and caused his legs to fall out from beneath him. He fell, and you quickly moved to throw your legs around his neck. He lay on the ground in a choke hold between your legs. You didn’t apply too much pressure, just enough to stop him from moving.
“Nice job.” He grunted. Just as you thought he would tap out, he grabbed either side of your waist and twisted you so he was able to free himself from your legs. You scrambled to get off your back but Bucky was too quick. His muscular legs had your ankles pinned down and his metal arm had both of your wrists over your head. It clicked into place and held you pinned to the ground.
You’d never felt weak in your life, you were skilled, strong, smart. But Bucky sitting above you like this made you feel so small.
“How can I tap out if you’re holding my arms?” You joked.
Without a moment’s warning Bucky lowered his head and pressed his lips against yours. Everything about Bucky was harsh, rough, and cold. But his kiss, it was gentle and sweet.
You kissed back without hesitation, his metal arm relaxed and your hands tangled into his messy hair. He unpinned your legs and you instinctively wrapped your thighs around his waist. His soft, real hand caressed your waist, holding you as if you were fragile china.
He didn’t touch you with his metal hand. He used it to hold up his weight. He never barely ever touched you with that hand. He never knew how strong it really was and he didn’t want to accidentally hurt you. Ever since you’d told him his hand was cold, he’d been much more cautious with it. You were the warmth in his life. He didn’t want to mess that up.
“Snegovik, we can’t do this here.” You smiled up at him, your hands held gently against his cheeks, his stubble tickling your palms.
“Let’s go then, my snezhinka.” He carefully picked you up and led you out of the gym.
Summary: You’re a HYDRA assassin that’s worked closely with the Winter Soldier, to each of your dismay you’re reunited with Bucky after the blip.
A/N: I haven’t posted in like 300 years, but I hope you guys enjoy this new series! This follows parts of TFATWS so expect spoilers! (Also I’m sure all the Russian is absolutely wrong, if you’d like to correct it please send me a message!)
Word Count: 1,815 (future chapters will be wayyy longer)
“So tell me about this-” the therapist looked down at her notes briefly, “(Y/N).” She finished.
Bucky paused momentarily, “No.”
“James, for these therapy sessions to be effective, you need to open up to me. I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s wrong.” His therapist responded, laying her pen carefully on her small notebook.
Bucky thought for a moment, taking in the ambience of the room. What would he even say about (Y/N)? He hadn’t seen her in years. Bucky was kicking himself for accidentally bringing her up in his session last week. “I- uh-” he stammered, shifting his weight on the couch, “I met her in 2011. At least I think it was 2011. Date’s get kinda fuzzy sometimes, with all the cryo.” Bucky’s hand pressed against his head, feeling dazed as he tried to think back. “It was at the big HYDRA base outside of Moscow. We had to go on a mission together-” he was cut off,
“Did she work for HYDRA?” Dr Raynor interjected.
“Yea. She was an assassin too. She went by the alias the Viper.” Bucky pretended not to notice his therapist tense up. Anyone who knew anything about HYDRA knew who the Viper was. She was one of the most prolific assassins after the Winter Soldier.
“Tell me more about when you met her.”
“We were instructed to take out a terrorist organisation forming against SHIELD. Which was ironic because we were working for a terrorist organisation. But at this point SHIELD was being run by HYDRA and they couldn’t risk any slip ups, so they put 6 assassins on the job. HYDRA usually didn’t have their assassins working together, we were all too volatile. But we had to take out over 70 people in one night. It was (Y/N), a few assassins from the Red Room, and a few agents that HYDRA had trained personally, and me.” Bucky stopped.
“Where was (Y/N) trained?”
“At a secondary facility run by HYDRA. She was trained from a really young age. It’s all she’s known.” Bucky seemed somber. But his therapist continued,
“What happened on the mission?”
“Nothing. It went exactly to plan. The targets were taken out and we all left without a trace. But (Y/N), she- she kept trying to talk to me, or get to know me. I was the Winter Soldier. No one in their right mind ever tried to ‘get to know me’.”
“Why do you think (Y/N) did that?”
“She told me she was bored.” He replied bluntly.
Moscow
2011
The poorly lit conference room was filled with a myriad of assassins and officials. The only illumination came from old LED lights hanging from the concrete ceiling. The mossy green paint on the walls looked as if it hadn’t been patched up in years. The only new-ish part of the room was the large, oak conference table, surrounded by black, leather seating. It was difficult not to notice the red HYDRA symbol holding a spot on almost every piece of clothing in the area.
“TITAN terroristicheskaya organizatsiya, formiruyushchayasya protiv nas. (TITAN is a terrorist organisation forming against us.)” Kuznetsov spoke, “Izbrannyye budut otpravleny segodnya vecherom v Ukrainu dlya vypolneniya postavlennoy zadachi. Uberi ikh. (The chosen ones will be sent to Ukraine tonight to complete their given tasks. Take them out.)”
That was all it took. You stared at the file in front of you. You had read through it multiple times, going over every single name, every single skill set your targets had. You were more than certain you could complete this job on your own. But you had no choice on the matter.
Your eyes darted around, taking in the faces of the assassins that were to accompany you on your mission. Two youthful females, dressed in black leather sat next to each other. The older, grimacing woman behind them was Madame B., the head supervisor of the Red Room. You moved your gaze to the two agents in dark green uniforms and red, soviet berets. Neither looked particularly menacing.
You finally landed on the last assassin. His dark hair fell like curtains around his face. Gloomy blue eyes searched their way through the room. His sharp jaw seemed tense through his stubbled cheeks. He was large, extremely built. Covering his frame was an amplitude of black clothing and gear.
“Play nice.” Your mentor spoke softly over your shoulder, breaking you from your train of thought.
“I always do.”
~
Your padded snow boots ripped through the thick snow covering the ground. The six of you had hiked your way to the set point on your GPS systems, the clouds of snowfall covering your vision held the illusion that there were absolutely no structures nearby. A large helicopter had dropped the group a few miles out from the hideout to ensure nothing was compromised. The trek was in utter silence, fighting against the harsh temperature in mid February.
The waypoint became closer on your map, a tiny building slowly appeared in your vision against the foggy downfall. It was a small, wooden cabin. Everyone hustled their way through the unlocked door. It was barren, it held no furniture, no blankets, no means of any life. There appeared to be a few doors that led to small, empty rooms. The entrance only held a small fireplace, filled with old cut down logs that had been eaten by bugs.
The group quickly dispersed, you headed to one of the rooms alone, throwing down your belongings onto the floor. The bag you carried was mainly filled with weapons and ammunition, along with a very warm sleeping bag. You knew too well you wouldn’t be sleeping tonight, but you would need the extra heat for now.
There was no chatter anywhere in the house. Your mission would begin in 6 hours. Everyone was likely putting together their artillery. You decided to cozy up in your navy sleeping bag for a moment of comfort.
Someone had lit the fire in the lounge. A warm, orange light crept through the cracks in your door. The ambiance was strangely calming for a shitty cabin in the middle of nowhere.
Snow continued to fall against the tiny glass pane of your room. You weren’t a fan of assassinating in the snow. It was low vision, harsher climates, and it lessened the ability to move. Snakes weren’t creatures of the cold. Conveniently you’d been grouped with someone who called himself ‘The Winter Soldier’. I’m sure he loves the cold, you thought.
You’d heard a lot about him. Everyone had. He was the perfect assassin. He never failed a mission, his body didn’t reject cryo, every form of enhancement HYDRA had used on him had been a success. He was what every assassin had aspired to be.
Without thought, you grabbed the glass bottle laying next to you and walked off to the room the Winter Soldier had claimed for the night.
“Privet (Hello)”. You announced, pushing his door open with a creak. His head didn’t turn towards you. He sat on the floor, the sound coming from him indicated he was sharpening knives.
“Khochesh’ vypit’? (Want a drink?)” You asked, motioning the bottle towards him.
He stayed silent for a moment. Finally he turned, looking up at you from his position on the floor. “What is it?” His dark tone asked back. The amber light from the fire crashed against his features. His strong jaw was covered with a dark stubble, his brunette hair tucked behind his ears. His most obvious feature was the hauntingly blue eyes that sat in sunken sockets, he looked drained.
“It’s vodka.” You stated, honestly. You were surprised to hear he wasn’t Russian, he sounded… American?
“You’re drinking before a mission?” He queried.
You shrugged. “Alcohol doesn’t freeze.” You sat down next to him. “Plus it takes the edge off.” A faint clinking noise announced as you placed the bottle on the floor between you two. He stared at you for a moment, before quietly going back to his knives.
“Wanna play 20 questions?” You interrupted the silence.
“No.”
“What about truth or dare?”
“I’m not 14.” the soldier replied, his eyes not leaving his handy work.
“How old are you?” You shot back,
“Why are you trying to get to know me?” He dodged your question.
“I’m bored.” You shrugged, taking a deep swig of the vodka. “And by my calculations,” you peered down at your watch, “we still have 3 hours and 27 minutes until the mission starts.”
He gave a shallow sigh, “93.”
“What?”
“I’m 93. How old are you.”
“93?! You were born in 1917?”
“Mhm. How old are you.”
“25. You look great for 93.” You chuckled.
“You look old for 25.” He jabbed back. His knife sharpener still grinding across a 6 inch blade.
“You flatter me.” You replied sarcastically. “So what’s your story? How’d you make it to 93?”
“You don’t want to know.”
“Why would I ask if I didn’t want to know?”
Bucky looked over at you. “I’m telling you, you don’t want to know.”
“C’mon old man, I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.” You smirked. He once again, went back to his knives. It almost seemed as if he was trying to threaten you, pulling out larger knife after larger knife.
You huffed, opening your mouth to speak, “I was born in Hungary to a drug abusing mother, and an absent father. I was kidnapped and sold to HYDRA when I was 6. I was placed under the care of the Kraken. Not sure if you’ve met him, he’s this large guy-”
“I’ve met him.” Bucky stated, interrupting your spiel.
“Right, well, he trained me for years. Eventually HYDRA got involved again and I was tested on, experimented on, messed with, ya’ know, all that fun stuff.” You explained.
“Are you enhanced?” Bucky asked, almost as if he was actually interested.
“Yea. I have this whole snake venom trick. It’s great for up close combat. The experiments really should’ve killed me though. But maybe that’s what makes us so good-” Bucky looked over at the woman next to him, her bright eyes stared back at him as she spoke “ya’ know, the best assassins are the ones living off borrowed time. Because we’ve met death before, so we’re not afraid to do it again.”
Bucky quickly grabbed the Barrett M82 rifle next to him, his metal arm making faint whirring noises. “I’m going to scope out the base.” He stated bluntly. And with that, his large black boots walked him out the bedroom, and out the door.
You let out a faint sigh, creeping back to your room to sort out your weapons. You were sure it was something you said that scared him off. I guess at 93 you have to be living off too much borrowed time, you speculated. You absentmindedly set up your pistols, your mind not being able to wander from the Winter Soldier. Maybe annoying the Red Room girls would get your mind off it.
Summary: James Buchanan Barnes broke your heart two years ago. Now, after settling down finally in college with your group of old and new friends, he ́s transferred into your school, and maybe back into your heart.
Word Count: 4k
Warnings: Angst galore, uhhh Buckys old house, more thor x reader a tiny bit tho
A/N: TAG LIST IS CLOSED!
Feedback is always appreciated! Thanks for reading loves, I hope you guys like it!
*Gif not mine, credit to owner*
College AU - Bucky x Reader
Summary: James Buchanan Barnes broke your heart two years ago. Now, after settling down finally in college with your group of old and new friends, he ́s transferred into your school, and maybe back into your heart.
“I don’t get why they have to practice so early, I mean classes just ended for the day.” Wanda groaned as you all sat on the bleachers, blankets around your bodies as you all huddled for warmth, trying to shield from the snowflakes that would grace your cheeks and hair.
“You’re tellin’ me, I have four more hours until it’s socially acceptable to go to bed.” You groaned, rubbing your gloved hands together, trying your best to create any form of friction for warmth. Wanda did the same, but instead clutched her hot chocolate to her chest and let out an annoyed mumble of words you didn’t understand.
The football team always practiced from three to eight. Five hours of drills, pain, and sweat. You grimaced at the thought. Now of course you didn’t have to be there. But it was tradition. No one missed a single practice since that time Steve had an asthma attack on the field in his freshman year of highschool. Vivid memories of that day replayed in your mind, the absolute terror on everyone’s faces as he gasped for air. No one knew where his inhaler was, until Bucky came racing out of the locker room with it in his hand. Of course you didn’t know who Bucky was until a year later, but that day you could have sworn you started to look at him differently.
So you all made a vow, you, Wanda, Nat, Tony, to never miss another practice, rain or snow. And now was the time when you all started to regret it. Whenever it got colder out, you all talked about how stupid of an idea it really was, complained about how you should end the stupid pact. Regardless no one ever did. You were all glad for the downtime, to just relax and chat over coffee or hot chocolates, and occasionally muffins from the stand outside of campus.
During highschool, it was also where you and Bucky could flaunt the amazing part of dating a football player. The quick pecks on the lips after he made a good pass, or kicked a practice field goal made your heart soar. Or when he’d run up to you, as you screeched trying to get away from his stinky self, and pick you up in his arms peppering sloppy kisses to your face when it was a good day.
But it also meant the bad parts. Him being stressed out after a practice gone wrong, the silence on the car rides back home, and tears shed because of one too many accidental cleats to the stomach during tackles.
“Hey anyone know what the theory for-”
“No Peter” Everyone mumbled out of habit as the brunette flipped you all off and went back to scribbling in his physics notebook.
“Tony why don’t you just help him. It’d save all of us a headache.”
“Natalia, my dear, sweet little Natalia, he is my prodigee. I can’t just go around doing things for him. Parker here needs to learn to do them himself, then we’ll talk.”
“Well if you would just-”
“Zip it. I’m trying to watch the game.” Tony hissed, only now paying attention to the practice on the field. Internally groaning, you rested your head against Natasha’s shoulder and let your eyes focus on the grey clouds moving above you.
About an hour of trying to see what shapes you could find, practice finally ended early.
“Thank god for Saltzman getting injured, otherwise I would still be freezing my ass off.” You muttered, tugging your maroon zip-up hoodie tighter around your body. Everyone nodded in silent agreement as you sat in the Student Union waiting for the guys to get back from the locker rooms.
The Student Union area was smaller than most colleges, but was packed to the brim with things to do. An air hockey table was in the back corner, along with a small ping pong table, bright orange and blue paddles laying on top of it. There was a small stand by the front doors, filled to the brim with various snacks, ramen noodle options, drinks, and hot beverage machines.
It was the center of the campus, but most people, obviously, shied away from it when giving tours. Does anyone really want to see where their kid is going to ditch off work to hang out with their friends? Didn’t think so.
Thankfully it was free of cameras and a majority of the staff didn’t care enough to stop any alcohol consumption that went on in there. Always muttering something about ‘At least they’re all in one place…’ Which you’d think would cause more concern, but apparently not.
“Whatever, I’m getting something to drink.” Standing up, you pushed through small crowds and walked your way up to the front of the coffee station. Your eyes scanned over the small menu for the third time, hoping anything different than your usual would jump out at you. Normally, you wouldn’t have given it a second glance, choosing to order a simple caramel latte, sometimes with two shots of espresso to wake you up in the mornings, but hey nothing stays the same.
“One hot chocolate please, with a kick.”
The student behind the counter nodded and began mixing together the packet with hot water. Following with a dash of vodka and cinnamon. He topped the mug with whipped cream and handed it over to you with shaky hands.
“Are you feeling alright? You never order hot chocolate.” A rough voice called out from behind you, turning around you rolled your eyes playfully and let out a faint chuckle.
“Just not feelin’ the caffeine today, ya’ know?”
“Oh but you’re up for a splash of happy water?” Thor asked, pulling out his wallet and handing the cashier the five dollar bill.
“I had that you know… you don’t have to buy my drinks all the time.” You scolded, poking your pointer finger against his chest. He simply laughed, and moved his hand to yours, choosing to interlock your fingers instead of just swatting your hand away.
Shooting him a timid smile you held the steaming mug in one hand, ignoring the possibility of small blisters, and chatted away with him about how practice went on your way back to the table.
“Anyone know where Rogers is, I need our notes from class back.” You muttered, plopping down against one of the plush red couches, joining the rest of your friends.
Bucky had seen your whole interaction with Thor, and there was a permanent scowl on his face the entire time. Of course he knew it wasn’t his place to say anything but it still made his blood boil in his veins. His chest felt constricted, heart beating furiously in his chest as he found it harder to breathe. The sight reminded him he wouldn’t be yours again, unless he somehow found a way to pull you back in again.
That used to be him on your arm. Laughing shamelessly at some dumb thing Steve did, or you playfully slapping his arm as he whispered something suggestive in your ear.
He let out a strangled sigh, and ran his fingers through his sweat stricken hair. “Sorry Doll, thinkin’ he might’ve gone up to the apartment to change and grab warmer clothes for the incoming storm.” He leaned back against the cushion and looked over at you. “I’m heading there now, I can drive you if you’d like.”
“I-uh no it’s-”
“Nonsense, c’mon I know you’ve missed Becc’s and my Ma.” He winked and held his hand out for you to take.
He wasn’t wrong, you did miss his family, maybe even more than him, and you and his sister had a lot to talk about. So it was either get your ass in gear and actually finish your homework, or stall and head out.
“Guess it wouldn’t hurt. I’ll see you guys later.” You said with a small grin as you grabbed your bag from the couch and swung it over your shoulder. Bucky gave you a small smile as he followed beside you out to the front doors, his hand ghosting over the small of your back, smugly grinning to himself, knowing Thor was watching.
“Fuck!” You hissed as you slammed the door of Bucky’s black Jeep shut and attempted to brush the now melted snowflakes from your hair.
“I hate this weather.” Bucky muttered as he slid into the drivers side and slammed his door shut. Quickly turning on the car and blasting the heat. As you waited for the car to heat up, you reached for the aux cord and plugged it into your phone, “Doll you better play something worthy of my ears, or I might just cry.”
“Oh hush, I always play good music.”
“Yeah like what? The Jonas Brothers?”
“You leave Nick, Joe, and Kevin alone!” You shrieked, reaching over and smacking his upper-arm, which drew a hearty laugh from him as he pulled out of the parking lot.
“Relax, you know I love a good jo bros song.”
“You better.” You hissed, shooting him a glare which had him raising one hand up in defense.
The car ride was long, and painfully quiet other than the soft sound of the radio, and the blasting of the heat. You brought your legs up to rest on the dashboard and leaned your head to the side to look out the window.
The snow was coming down hard and the wind only made it worse. Bucky had the windshield wipers going at their full speed, the car going slower than 25mph. Two miles away from his Ma’s house and it would take hours.
“So I never did get to ask, how was Europe?” You asked, glancing up at him from your phone as you scrolled through songs.
“It was great, beautiful even. Lots to do, and the legal drinking age is a plus, they certainly have much better beer.” His whole face seemed to light up as he continued on about his adventures, “When we actually get to my Ma’s I’ll have to show you the photos I took. The trip was great, albeit lonely but worth the experience.” He hummed, his fingers drumming along the steering wheel to the gentle sound of Dean Lewis playing in the background.
“I can imagine. I’d sell a kidney to go. I remember when we would talk about living there when we were older. You were so adamant about not living in London.” You chuckled as he rolled his eyes, bumping his shoulder with yours.
“Hey! It’s expensive.”
“Yeah but we would have figured it out… like everything else…” You paused and looked out the window, almost like a dumb rom-com cliche, “Almost…”
The car became eerily silent and you cleared your throat moving forward to switch the song to something more upbeat. “Anyways uh-”
“Fuck! No no no!” Bucky cursed and you felt the car slowly roll to a stop, sputtering out and then dying.
“Oh fuck…” You muttered, as he frantically dug through his pocket for his phone. Dialing a number, he brought the phone up to his ear and climbed out. “Stay here.” He mumbled before slamming the door shut.
Within a few short minutes the car started to get chilly again, and you groaned wrapping your coat even closer around you, if it were possible. The door was pulled open and quickly shut again and Bucky was sat there rubbing his gloved hands together and cursing under his breath.
Tentatively you reached over and brushed a few snowflakes from his now bright red face, nose and cheeks nipped at by the cold air.
“Tow companies can’t come out until the morning, so either we sleep in this old piece of junk, or walk the mile to my Ma’s.” You glanced out the window, braving for the worst and grunted, shoving the door open.
The second the harsh wind hit your face you winced, regretting your decision. But you decided against getting back in that car and walked around to the other side of the road. Bucky popped open the trunk and pulled out his and your bags, along with an old blanket. Your breath hitched as you ran your hands over the soft fabric.
“You kept it, for all this time?”
“To be fair I didn’t have my car and I forgot I even had it. You can have it back, not like I have any use for it.”
Okay that stung a bit.
He slammed the trunk shut and tossing it at you. You stared down at the dark blue fleece in your hands and let out a muffled sigh.
This stupid fabric held so many memories for you and Bucky. He had bought you it when you mentioned around christmas time five years ago that you needed a throw blanket that you could just have hanging around.
You would sit on it with him when he’d take you to the drive in movies, and you’d curl up against him, laughing as he made stupid jokes and comments about the movie that was playing.
Harsh winds ripped and pushed at one side of your coat, your body acting as a barrier for it. Bucky walked beside you, hands stuffed into his pockets, scarf pulled over his growing stubble, and occasionally bumping his arm into yours.
“I don’t t-think I’ll ever hate anything… more than… this.” Your teeth chattered as you looked over at him, blinking rapidly to remove snowflakes from your lashes.
“I know doll, we’re almost there…” He blew out and you watched as his breath seemed to freeze as it passed his lips, floating off into the sky, the wind taking it away.
The finals steps up to his mother’s house was filled with staggering feet, and hot tears seemed to freeze as they slid down your cheeks from the cold.
Bringing a hand up to knock, Bucky abruptly pushed past you and slammed through the front door, stumbling into the house and dragging you after him. You turned, and slammed the door shut, bracing against the harsh wind and snow pouring in as the smell of hot chocolate and warm apple pie filled your nose.
“Buck is that you? I- OHMYGOD!” And just like that you were being slammed into again and stumbled back, falling against the carpeted stairs.
Bucky yanked his sister off of you and hoisted her up to her feet, and then reached down and took your hand in his own. You jumped to your feet, and hastily brushed hair away from your face.
“Becca, I love you, but please don’t knock me over again.” You teased pulling her in for a proper hug. She giggled and you felt her shake her head against your sweater.
“Hey Ma?” Bucky called out, dragging his feet against the carpet in an attempt to remove the snow from his boots.
“Yes my love?” Winnifred called out, her familiar voice making shivers run down your spine.
You hadn’t heard from her in what felt like ages. Rushing past Becca, and Bucky into the kitchen you shyly looked up at her, a cheeky grin drawn on your features.
“Sweetie!” She shrieked, dropping the freshly baked pie to the counter and racing towards where you stood. Winifreds’ arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you flush against her. “How are you?! Goodness it has been ages!” She rushed towards you, tugging off her oven mitts in the process and pulled you in for a tight hug.
“How have you been darling?” She cooed and any bit of cold left your body at her silky voice.
“I’m hanging in there, what about yourself?” You spoke, voice cracking as you pulled away from her.
“Oh you two must be frozen! Here let me pour you some cocoa.” Winnifred rushed around the kitchen, putting the kettle on the stove and preparing two mugs. “Bec’s why don’t you take (Y/N) upstairs, and help her get settled.”
“Ma I think I can-”
“Absolutely not mister, we are having a talk.” Winnifred interrupted her son and shot him with a cold glare motioning for him to sit at the kitchen island. Bucky grumbled a small ‘help me’ under his breath as he brushed past you, making you chuckle.
“So how’s college been?” Becca asked excitedly as she helped you set up the Buckys old room. However you zone out when the memories hit you like a freight train. The now blank walls cause tears to form in your eyes, lip quivering as your hand reaches down to brush against the familiar and plush bed sheets.
The warm light from the bedside lamp coats the room in a gold glow and suddenly you feel yourself floating with happiness, like you did in highschool. Happiness overwhelms you as you look around the room, slowly, to take everything in.
The stain where Bucky got the legendary nose bleed, that you and Becca tried to clean for what felt like hours. You guess it never did fully come out like you had hoped.
The crack in the window where you threw one to many rocks at in order to wake your then lover in the middle of the night.
Childish feelings that you’re still chasing the high of.
“Hey,” Bucky’s voice, slow and rough washes over you like a bucket of ice water. “Sorry, probably shoulda told Bec’s not to set you up in here…” He clears his throat, startling you as the floating feeling goes away and now your feet feel like cinder blocks, weighted to the shagged carpeting beneath you.
“N-no it’s okay! Unless you uh, want your room back…” He chuckles and shakes his head.
“Don’t sweat it doll, I’ll take the guest room.” And with that he turns and disappears out through the door.
Collapsing onto the twin sized bed, a sigh escapes you.
You had stopped counting the days since he left after about four weeks. He had reached out to you, just to check in but you ignored it. Your heart breaking at the sight of his dumb letter, so you hid it away.
Leave it to Bucky to send a fucking letter, you thought to yourself, as you tossed it into your desk drawer, never to be opened. He always was a hopeless romantic.
But in the days he was gone, and even now you miss the dip in your mattress where he used to lay. The soft kisses he’d leave on your skin, and the soft breaths in the crook of your neck. The way his hair fell over his eyes, laughing softly as you tried to fix it, but always giving up in the end. He was apart of you, he branded himself into your skin, and his love was a drug to you, seeping into your veins, and you were tired of the withdrawals, yet fearful of the risks.
You walk slower down the stairs than you’d like too. Eyes dragging over old photos on the wall, that held so much to the Barnes family. You pause halfway down the steps at a photo of you, kissing Bucky’s cheek at prom. He had insisted on a grey suit, with you in a red dress. He was more into fashion than you, so you went for it unknowing that you two were completely off theme for the magical night.
“Buck! Everyone is staring at us, you said we wouldn’t stand out.” Crossing your arms with a pout, your boyfriend let out a snort.
“Face it I lied, but you look radiant, better than anyone else here. Now come have a dance with me won’t you love?” He smiled, a genuine smile. One that he kept reserved for you, one that made you fall more in love than ever.
“Fine, only if you promise not to embarrass me.”
“Sweetheart, when have I ever embarrassed you?”
“In case you were curious, no Ma still hasn’t taken down the photos of us.” Bucky interrupts your flashback, a cold hand now resting on your upper back.
“Neither has mine,” You admit, eyes darting to your hands as you begin to pick at your nails in embarrassment. “Funny though, she always loved you a bit more than me.” He laughs at that, a full body one that has you worried you’ve said something wrong.
“Doll, your mom would put stars in the sky if it meant seeing you happy. So would mine actually.” He rubs the back of his neck, a shy grin on his face. You nod, staying quiet as you look over the photos on the wall once more.
“I’m still…” Bucky clears his throat, his hand tugging at the collar of his shirt. “I-uhm… fuck it, I’m still- here for you, yeah… a-always.” He mentally slaps himself across the face for chickening out. He stares down at you, this entire time. Him being back, the trip back to his old house, all he’s been wanting to do is grab your face and kiss you. So, fuck it, he thinks as he carefully grabs your cheeks and pulls you flush against him, his lips crashing into your own.
You don’t really know what to think, or do as you watch Bucky, almost in slow motion pull you closer and bring his lips to yours. Butterflies fill your stomach, your heart thumping wildly in your chest like a tiger wanting to break free of its cage.
Then everything turns to bliss, you feel younger, free, full of love and passion. So your fingers grab at his sweater, pulling him closer to you begging for more. Your lips move in rhythm with his teeth bumping and scattered breaths.
And then reality sets in. Here you are standing in your ex boyfriends stairwell, in his moms house, making out with him.
You whimper, pulling yourself away from him. And for a moment your brain and heart become one, urging you to go for more, urging you to jump back into his arms and kiss those delicious rosey lips again, have him pull you into his room and pin you against the bed like he would when you were younger. Your breathing picks up, and you shake your head shoving past him and into his old room.
“Y/N wait!” He calls after you, and the echoes of his heavy feet racing up the stairs makes you panic, slamming the door.
Bucky pauses in front of the door as he hears the soft click of the lock, his heart breaking in two. He should have waited, should have fucking waited.
He runs a hand over his face and groans, making his way slowly down the hall and into the guest bedroom.
hi lovelies!! i started watching tf&tws and got some pep back in my wanting to write. hopefully i’ll get over my writers block. i wanna finish up one of the other series i’m working on, hopefully heartbreak summer. heres the lil moodboard i did for my new series that i had previously talked about if anyone wants to take a guess on what it will be based in.
“I’ve got everything figured out, but you’ve got to be the one to help.” The leader of the group looked at his friend dead in the eye.
“No.” The ex-spy said, as he rolled his eyes, not allowing his friend, and tactician, to finish this sentence.
“Come on! It won’t cost you anything!” Another one of his friends claimed.
“No!” The grumpy man’s voice radiated finality. He wasn’t going to go back.
“You’re the only one of us who isn’t exactly known.” The redheaded woman said.
“I already said no! Now leave me alone.” The bite in his words didn’t go unnoticed by the others.
“Just hear him out!” His best friend begged, his eyes pleading.
“Fine. You’ve got thirty seconds.”
“28, a librarian. 3 cats, 3 dogs. From a rich family, had a hard childhood, hates the family. Single for 28 years of her life. Was in live once, when she was a kid. She’s our only way in. You’re the only one whose face isn’t plastered up on billboards, you’re the only one who can seduce her. ”
“What’s her name?”
“Y/N Y/L/N” He took the picture into his hands, looking at her. Her eyes seemed somewhat familiar to him. He didn’t know what could be familiar. She is just an ordinary librarian after all.
“Wait, where are we trying to get in this time, Stark?”
“The CIA.”
“Why?” He was suspicious. A CIA librarian is still just a librarian. He knew they are planning something, and that, since they desperately wanted him to participate, it was something big. Why would his friends, a bunch of scientists, actors, and rich kids, who have been leading the secret life of spies and criminals for ages, be up for THIS?
“There are some…unresolved businesses between me and them.”
“From your early hacking days?”
“Yes.”
“Alright. I’ll help.” He sighed.
“Welcome back, Spy Barnes!”
“Yeah. I’m back.”
——-
A/N: I’ve got exams until Friday, as soon as that passes, I’m posting as much as I can. I had to write it, since no one else did
Summary: It’s been 4 years since the love of Bucky’s life died a horrible death in the hands of Hydra. He has slowly moved on, forming a new relationship with Natasha and his heart has started to heal. The Avengers are dispatched on a mission only to discover that Y/N was never truly dead. Y/N returns into Bucky’s life but she is no longer the same woman he fell in love with. Bucky is forced to make choices between the woman that he loved and the woman he is falling in love with.
Words:1028
Author’s notes: This chapter is just flashbacks mostly. Just to get a better understanding of what happened in the past. Let me know what you guys think!
Natasha tossed and turned, trying to drown out the screaming coming from Bucky’s room. She knew it was none of her business and she was never close to him, but she knew how much he loved Y/N and how hard he took it when she died. After a couple more hours of hearing Bucky’s night terrors, Natasha found her way to Bucky’s room. She could see his shirtless body on top of the covers, his body was covered with sweat and his flesh hand was handcuffed to the bedframe. Natasha cautiously crawled onto his bed and woke him up.
“Y/N?” Bucky looked at Natasha, still half asleep.
“Shhhh. Go back to sleep Bucky.” Natasha rubbed his back slowly, like what Y/N used to do.
“Y/N. I thought I lost you. I was so scared.” Bucky, convinced that the dark figure above him was Y/N, wrapped his arm around Natasha lovingly.
“It’s ok Bucky, I’m here.” Natasha cooed. Ever since that night, Natasha came into Bucky’s bed and pretended to be Y/N to calm his nightmares. Bucky seemed to not remember what happened the next day, so she kept doing it, until he woke up one night and found her sleeping on his bed. Their dynamic changed from then on and they started to see each other as more than friends.
Bucky loved Natasha, he really did. He adored her strong will and her relentless need to make sure that he was happy, but it was never a love that took over his heart. His love for Natasha could never trump his love for Y/N. He tried, but no matter what happened he always found himself thinking about Y/N. Maybe he could never love anyone as much as he loved Y/N, maybe Y/N was his peak. But he did everything he could for Natasha. Showering her with love and giving her gifts after every mission. But it was all to compensate for the guilt he felt for never loving her with his full heart.
Natasha knew she was living in Y/N’s shadow. How could she compare against her? Y/N was beautiful and innocent, like a real-life Disney princess. It saddened her, seeing Bucky’s face when Y/N’s name was mentioned, or when he accidentally says Y/N’s name when they make love. Natasha let it all go because she knew that eventually, Y/N would become a distant memory to Bucky and that their love for one another would eventually overpower his love for her. Eventually, Bucky would love her more than he loved Y/N.
4 YEARS AGO
Y/N woke up sore and bleeding all over. She laid face first in the sand, her hands cut open from the trip through the monolith. As she stood up, her head started to spin. She was in a desert, with nothing but sand dunes for miles and HYDRA had given her nothing to survive on. She can’t remember how many hours she walked in the scorching heat, but she accepted her death has she felt her body weaken with dehydration and her legs buckling from exhaustion.
Mr. Hyde’s men found her lying in the sand in a pool of her own blood. They hauled her onto the back of their horse and took care of her until she was strong enough to walk on her own. She thought it was a blessing, until one of them men got injured and she used her powers to heal him, to show her gratitude for saving her. Their dynamic changed then. The men had found a girl with extraordinary abilities, she was not longer just a helpless girl lost in the desert, she became an asset to Hyde’s gang.
They tied her hands with rope and pulled her along with them like a dog on a leash. She walked for 3 day until they reached the basecamp, and then she was presented to Hyde, like an offering. Hyde liked Y/N right away, she was beautiful and there was a sense of innocence about her that he was attracted to. Mr. Hyde had always taken pleasure to turning innocent people into self-hating monsters, that was his specialty. But Y/N was different, she wasn’t afraid of Hyde at first and she stood up for herself despite his threats. Maybe it was Stockholm syndrome, but the two of them formed an unlikely friendship.
Y/N escaped when Hyde forced her to marry him. She declined his proposal and he got angry. He had turned into the monster they said he was, she was forced into a wedding dress and forced to sleep with him. Despite claiming to love her, she knew that Hyde only wanted to impregnate her, so that he could have a son as an heir. When she got pregnant, she was afraid for her child’s life. She didn’t want her son to grow up with hate and god forbid if she had a girl, she didn’t want her daughter to be traded and sold like playing cards. Y/N didn’t see any other option but to stab herself in the stomach, to protect the child and herself. It broke her soul, she was never the same person since then. Hyde, in his anger, locked Y/N up and forced the doctors to experiment on her. He wanted to make her stronger and expand her abilities because he believed that his future heir would gain the abilities she has. She escaped two weeks later and developed an immunity to fire She’s been running from Hyde ever since, afraid of his anger.
Present day
Y/N stood in the flames, like a phoenix who had been reborn. Everyone was still engrossed in the scene before them that they didn’t notice Natasha pointing a gun towards Y/N. Bucky was the first one to see the bullet fly through the air and head straight towards Y/N’s head. As he screamed for Y/N to get down, Natasha was pinned down to the ground by SHIELD agents and put into handcuffs. Flames built a wall around Y/N’s naked form, melting the bullet as it passed through. With a sign of relief, Bucky made his way towards Y/N and she stepped out of the flames. He covered her with his jacket and took her to the Avengers compound via quinjet.
“I know who you are!” Natasha yelled as Y/N looked back at her with horror.
You guysssss. What do you think Natasha knows? Who is Y/N? Are you team Natasha or team Y/N? Let me know! And tags are always open!
