#broken

I went to take something from my sister and as I was walking away, I heard my mother tell my sister how big I am and they started talking about my size and I know it seems petty but that’s all it takes for me to want to skip dinner and cry. It’s not like skipping dinner will make me smaller but it fills me with some sort of satisfaction.

When I’m distracted it’s easy to forget how shitty I feel about life and myself. But after those hours, it’s back to square one. Hating myself.

There nothing harder than having to pretend as though you’re not being eaten up inside when around people. I’m tired of it all, I just want to stay in my room alone forever but I can’t because my family still needs me. I just want it to stop.

Iam broken. Stop trying to fix me!

There was this girl who was once in love,

In love with a guy for quite sometime.

The guy so liked the girl that he courted her.

They became a couple eventually.

He was her first, but she was never his.

A movie date was their first date together.

He first held her hand while watching a live show.

He kissed her on the cheek which made the girl blush.

Their first phone call lasted ‘til 6 in the morning, 7 hours straight.

She found it hard to sleep when he said his first “I love you.”

It’s so sudden that everything had to end that way.

Goodbyes were left unsaid,

And tears were shed every night.

They held on to their promises of forever,

Hoping that they will be given another chance.

As time passed by, they accepted the fact that they needed to move on.

Promises were broken,

And forever doesn’t exist.

If there is forever,

Then, forever is not enough.

Written by: Carol Nicole Cueto