Draco Malfoy has no regrets about the relationship he has with you. Especially as the War has only justended.
Your heart pounded in your ears as you watched with bated breath at the intensity of the fight between your current worst nightmare and your classmate.
Words had been shared between the two adversaries but you were overly engaged in fighting for your life to be really interested in what the two males were actually saying to one another. Only catching glimpses of them as you twisted and contorted in your grim dance.
As you faced your newest opponent, duelling aggressive spells towards them, not allowing them a moment to attack you, waves of powerful magic reached you, overpowering you; crippling all sense of movement as it compelled you to turn to its epicentre in wonder; in horror. In hope.
Harry Potter.
Survivor.
Victor.
Returning to your body from the shock, you turned to your side and cast a spell to your opponent who didn’t even realise what had happened to him, still gravely focused on the fall of his Master. If you hadn’t have been in the battle, the sound his skull made as it connected with the floor, would have made you cringe and sick to your stomach.
Looking around the room, what was once the immaculately gorgeous Great Hall, your ears ringing, you started to tend to the injured. You prepared yourself with studying medical journals and shadowing Madame Pomfrey for this very reason. You had basic medic skills, considering who you were friends with and with the threat of war, at the time, becoming all the more real, you studied more and for longer.
During the time it took, from the first break of sunlight to the Hall being cast in a golden hue, you had tended to a range of injuries. As small as disinfecting cuts to something as painful as wrapping broken ribs.
Hermione and Ginny had made their way over to you both to seek medical treatment and to make sure you were alright. The younger ginger had hugged you tightly, when you had wrapped her wrist securely in bandage, burying her head into your neck for comfort and to bawl her sorrows out; Hermione huddled close to the pair of you, offering her support with a gentle hand rubbing Ginny’s back.
The three of you stood there for a while. Basking in the peace and emotional comfort of each other. Long enough for Ginny to wipe her eyes and gather her wits once more, before taking a deep breath and headed over to her family.
Hermione stayed with you, her arm hooked through yours, supporting each other as you observed the room. “Hey, ‘Mione?” You whispered, your strength was slowly depleting and the strain had made it difficult to talk at a normal level.
“Hmm?” She too was experiencing the drain of energy. Unable to really formulate a sentence without effort.
Both of you standing with your weight balanced against the other.
“Are you and Ron together now?”
She snorted, emotions were taught and laughter was a foreign concept at the moment but a small twitch of her lips gave way to the beginnings of a smile, “yeah, I think so.”
“That’s good.”
“Yeah.”
“I told you so.”
“Oh, Y/N.” Hermione drawled, a small smile now on her lips. “What about you and Draco?”
Your response was a small shrug, worry tightening its chains around your heart as you admitted, “I haven’t seen him since before all…this.”
“If it helps, I think I can see him across the room.” Your eyes darted over everyone in the Hall which was thoroughly packed with people. Quickly, your eyes landed on a strikingly blonde head of hair in the direction Hermione had gestured to.
From this distance you observed, scanning his body, as much of it as you could from where you were, for any obvious injuries and wounds. With a deep breath that exhaled as a heavy sigh, you couldn’t see anything.
“Go to him.” Was the quiet prompt you received in your ear. A quick glance back to Hermione, ensuring she would be okay, she pushed you on.
Your feet wouldn’t run as your steps were already heavy from exhaustion.
No one stopped you as you passed them, nor did you want them to.
Your tired brain could only focus on its task, getting to Draco. Cheering your limbs to keep moving. You were nearly there.
Narcissa met your gaze, a fleeting smile gracing her lips as she watched you approach before putting her hand on her son’s shoulder and encouraging him to look up.
His eyes lit up in a blaze of renowned emotion and his body rocketed up from where he was sat, rushing to wrap you up in a tight embrace.
Your arms wrapped themselves around his neck, holding him in place. His own had secured themselves around your waist and along your back.
You were embracing each other so tightly, so securely that for a moment, no one could tell what was Draco and what was you.
With a hiccup, Draco lifted his head, gently resting his forehead against yours, your noses brushing and eyes locked together. A lone tear fell down your cheek as Draco took a deep breath to steady himself, “I love you.”
A smile bloomed on your face, “as I love you. No regrets, Draco. None.” Declared with finality from your soul, sealed with a kiss.
A promise for the both of you that no matter what happened in the past, what had only juststoppedhappening, and what will happen, will be done because neither one of you would carry regrets into your future together.
It was not an immediate fix. No one overcomes the turmoil of a War overnight.
It was a promise between the two of you, only.
One that would help you both to heal. To move on. To grow and to mature.
Kenny…That’s the name the man told you to call him. Of course, you had a lot of names you’d rather call him, but none would’ve gotten you anywhere good.
Like most adults in the Underground, he’d never been exactly ‘warm’ in personality- hell, not even an ounce- yet despite how harsh he remained, there was a foreign care to his actions that you could never quite wrap your head around.
Upon first meeting you and Levi, he had given a stern command to follow him without any explanation. To your utter surprise, he ordered you both big bowls of soup and loafs of bread from the pub down the street without asking for anything in return; an action completely unheard of in your given environment. When you questioned his motives, he irked his brow and asked if you’d rather go back to starving on the streets. After that, he merely sipped on beer as you wipe off Levi’s face, begging him to eat slower or else he’d make himself sick.
Feeding the two of you that day wasn’t the only shocking action Kenny made because from that day on, he became a type of caregiver for you. Instead of returning to your makeshift home on the cold pavement, Levi and yourself were allowed to stay at Kenny’s apartment where he provided not only shelter, but a steady supply of food, a few new pairs of clothes that were far nicer than your mother’s old dresses that you had both worn, and lessons on how to fight which you had been relucent to take part in until realizing you’d need whatever skills you could to protect your little brother from the dangers of the world around you.
On the outside, Kenny actions might’ve made him seem like a caring old man with a heart of goal, after all, who else would take in two street rats? Of course, you didn’t think that to be true. Attitude wise, Kenny always remained the same from the moment you had first met. Unlike your mother who offered endless words of affection and praise, Kenny kept his distance aside from getting angry here and there. Perhaps it didn’t help that you carry a similar stubbornness in your bones.
To say the least, you and Kenny butted heads frequently. He’d tell you to fix your stance when swinging a knife and you’d reply with some snark comment that would earn a knock to the back of the head with a 'don’t be a smartass with me, brat’. The joke was on him, though. His remarks with you only gave you further access to a curse word library you could use in arguments with him whenever Levi wasn’t around to hear.
Speaking of which, Levi had always had a better relationship with Kenny in terms of respect. Being more timid with his own personality, your brother would rarely argue against the man’s instructions. He worked tirelessly to please him, a desire you assumed was fueled by Kenny’s constant comments about him being a 'runt’ and looking 'weak’. Any child would be determined to prove those assumptions wrong especially when they come from the only male role model in their life, which was why you though Levi saw Kenny’s advice and mentoring in such a high light. The problem is you and Kenny had far different ideas on how to raise a child, something you soon learned in an upsetting way.
It all began the day you saw the two walk through the apartment door, Levi’s face bloody from a large gash above his eyebrow and his nose leaking. Despite the blank expression he attempted to hold, you could tell instantly that he was on the verge of tears with his lip quivering and eyes twinkling. Originally, you had feared Kenny had done it, but when an explanation was demanded, he merely brushed you off with the answer that Levi had gotten into a 'tussle’ with some guys at the pub. Of course, that only made your anger flare as did the sobs that finally dropped from Levi’s month. While he could stay strong around his cold caretaker, such strength dried up when in the comforting arms of his sister.
Levi remained latched to your side that night as you and Kenny got into argument which soon became a routine very quickly. Time and time again, he would egg on your brother into fighting someone be it other kids or several adults three times his size. They’d then return home, the two of you would get into a shouting match over what’s best for Levi, and the night would end with Kenny marching out to go to the pub while you cleaned your brother’s wounds.
Things only grew worse when Levi began to sink further into Kenny’s influence, abandoning his once timid nature in favor of a cold and harsh demeanor you didn’t recognize. Soon, he began taking Kenny’s side in arguments, pushing you away when you tried to bandage him up while protesting that he can take care of himself. Needless to say, the shift in your brother’s personality along with the unnecessarily risk of his safety were beginning to push you over the edge, something Kenny began to take notice to.
Perhaps this was most obvious the night when you sat at the dinner table, tapping your fingers against the wood in an offbeat pattern as you glared out the window in complete disregard of the man across from you. Once again, Levi had returned home with more injuries which you sent him off to get cleaned if he insisted he could take care of himself so well. That left you and Kenny alone in a tense atmosphere that could be cut with a knife.
At one point, you glanced at him, finding your thoughts once again beginning to wonder over to why he even takes care of you both in the first place. He isn’t a kind person, neither of you give him anything in return, no one’s paying him at least that you know of…so why? What does he have to gain by caring for two street rats?
You had your theories, one in particular that always stuck to the back of your mind, but you usually kept it to yourself. Because you don’t want it to be true or are just scared it might not be, you don’t know, but at last, you decided to face that possible reality that night.
“Are you one of our dads?”
Kenny had spat his beer at your sudden question, his face morphed into a look disgust,“ tsk, what makes ya’ think I’m your dad, huh?!”
For some unknown reason, you hesitated to answer against the harshness of his own question,“ you…you knew our mom and I don’t see any other reason why you would take care of us unless…maybe…”
“Hate to break it to ya’, but I ain’t your dad, kid, nor am I your brother’s. Don’t go filling your head with such ridiculous ideas,” his lips return to the mug he’s been nursing on, ignoring the way your eyes cast down to your hands in a failed attempt at masking your own hurt. Within a few short seconds, you tried to convince yourself you should be celebrating Kenny not being your dad. Why the hell should you be happy to relate to him anyways?
“Then why? Why take care of us? And don’t try telling me it’s out of 'the goodness of your own heart’ or some other bullshit like that. I refuse to believe you of all people would take care of us because of that.”
Unlike before where he had been very quick to shut down your question, Kenny took his time to think over his answer before voicing it,“ you’re right. It’s 'cuz I made a promise to Kuncel. I would’ve broken it if I left her kids on the street without any good chance of survival…That’s the only reason I’m doing any of this. Once I’m sure you both can do fine on your own, I’ll be taking my leave so don’t go getting attached or anything.”
You had opened your mouth but didn’t say anything. You still weren’t sure how his words were making you feel. Part of you wanted to make a snide comment about how much better you’d be once he leaves, but at the same time, your hidden side wanted to argue, demanding to know how he could just come into your lives for several years, be the only father figure you’d ever know, then plan to just leave.
Of course, you stubbornly muzzled yourself back then, assuming he was just trying to push you back at arm’s length to ensure you got that thought of him being related to either of you out of your head.
…But it wasn’t just talk.
You remember turning to the sound of a door opening, smiling to see Levi’s figure standing there in the light. While his nose was bleeding and his face was scratched, he appeared otherwise fine, that was, until you caught sight of his eyes.
There was a sadness to them that immediately raised worry in your chest, thinking that perhaps he took a really bad beating you’d have to go return to someone, but when you put a hand to his cheek, making him look up at you as you fussed over his injuries, he mumbled the words that explained everything despite their lack of context.
”…He left…“
That had been the last time you admitted to yourself that you respected Kenny and with Levi’s words that sliver of hope inside your heart that thought of the man as a father-figure died…
The Underground is a cruel place even to the adults that call it home with each day being a constant battle to survive by any means necessarily. Having that be said, most residents are rarely open to the idea of steepening their responsibilities for any reason even if it concerns children, therefore, it should be no surprise that the harsh environment holds the highest numbers of orphans and youth fatalities within the Walls.
Underground women who are unfortunate enough to discover they’re with child have three options: terminate the pregnancy, abandoned the baby after its first breath, or take the challenge of providing for more than one life. Many women who take the third option often end up returning to the second, leaving their child alone on the streets to either somehow fend for themselves or simply rot, regardless of their age.
Despite the heaviness that comes with having children in such a cruel world, Kuncel kept her pregnancy without hesitation which many of her coworkers and clients theorized to be a choice born through her own loneliness or perhaps even an unrequited love she felt towards whoever the child’s father was. Of course, neither were true for Kuncel decided to keep her unborn child simply through the instant love she felt for them, a love that somehow managed to grow the day you were born.
From the moment she had first held you snuggly in her arms, she knew she’d never feel regret over her decision regardless of the challenges that may befall her because of it. You were the image of innocence and perfection with your chubby rose-dusted cheeks and that little fluff of (h/c) hair upon your head, your tiny face scrunched up in frustration upon finding yourself in a new environment. Your existence melted Kuncel’s heart and seeing how in love she felt over you, it would’ve been a shame if she hadn’t allowed her next accidental pregnancy turn into another blessing.
Five years after your own birth, your mother gave life to another child, this time a son in whom she named Levi. You can still remember the awe you felt when looking down at your baby brother for the first time as the tiny guy wiggled and whimpered in your mother’s arms. You recall having reached your hand out, watching in utter amazement when it takes his whole hand to wrap around just one of your fingers, his crying slowly fading as if he already knew at only a day old that his older sister will always protect him no matter what. Of course, it’s a promise you’ve never let him down on even when the two of you hide away in a cold ally with Levi curled over your lap, fast asleep while you remain alert for any type of danger.
You don’t know the exact number of days that’s passed since the two of you left home, only that you’ve been wondering around the Underground streets for quite some time. You had naively believed that it would be easy to find somewhere else to say with a roof over your heads, but such proved to be impossible. Every abandoned building is occupied by the homeless and every adult shoos you away no matter how much you beg, forcing you to find sanctuary in allies, however, even those ‘homes’ are only temporary with either aggressive dogs or creepy addicts chasing you away.
You’ve been at your current spot for a few nights now. Located on the quieter side of town, you managed to make a makeshift roof with some planks of wood set on top of two barrels which are pushed away from each other just enough to allow you and your brother an area to sit, not lay. You even hung one of your torn blankets over the ‘doorway’, creating a barrier in which Levi can hide behind whenever you go out looking for food.
Speaking of food, your rations ran out quickly, not that you even had much to begin with, which means you’ve had to start putting in effort to fill your stomachs. Regardless of how often your search, you don’t usually find much aside from rare scraps in the trash behind pubs, but even that’s never enough for the two of you especially when the owner chases you off.
While neither of you have ever known what it’s like to feel full, your mother had at least ensured that you were never starving. Without her around, the two of you are quickly becoming malnourished, your cheeks visually sunken in with your body’s slowly turning to bone. You’re in possibly the worse condition due to your own habit of giving Levi the majority of whatever food you do manage to find. If there isn’t enough for both of you, he gets it all, no questions asked, at least, not on your part, that is. If anything, you’ve actually turned into a good liar with your time on the streets, telling your brother that you ate on the way home so that he won’t feel bad for taking what you give. He’s your priority, but that doesn’t exclude you from the natural requirement of food. If you continue your current path of starvation, neither of you will survive for much longer.
Maybe that’s why you’re in your current position, following some random guy from a comfortable distance with your eyes glued to his right pocket. Moments earlier you had seen him purchase something at a stand, pulling out a few coins from said pocket. If you can just get as many coins as possible, there’ll surely be enough for you to buy a decent enough meal for you and your brother. Hell, at this point you’ll take even a single loaf of bread. Anything counts.
It isn’t as if you don’t feel guilty over what you’re doing. Your mother taught you right from wrong, stealing being one of the actions that lands in the later category, but she also told you that as an older sister, it is your job to protect your brother. At such a desperate point in your life, you’ve had to decide which is more important to follow no matter how terrible you feel for taking from another person who might need it. Unlike the man you’re following, you and Levi are children who have no way of making money yourselves, meaning you need it more, right? At least…that’s what you keep telling yourself anyways.
The gruff man stops for a short minute at the intersection, seemingly to wait for a few carts to pull by before he can continue his way across. What makes the moment even better is he only has his left hand in a pocket, his right pocket being clear for you to take your chance.
Dashing forward, you make quick work reaching into the target, grabbing a handful of coins in a death grip, although, you aren’t fast enough to retract your hand in time. The second your hand disappears into the pocket, the man’s own is clenched around your wrist with a grip strong enough to leave a bruise which honestly isn’t much considering your current condition.
Gasping in fear, you immediately try to pull your arm away, however, you’re trapped. Instead of faltering, his grip only tightens by your struggling,” the hell you think you’re doin’ stealin’ from me, brat?!“
His glare is enough to kill, but it doesn’t deter you in any way. You refuse to give up on your fight, desperately pulling and clawing at his arm in continuous attempts at breaking free with your shouts drawing nearly everyone’s attention, yet not a soul dares get involved (not that you think any of them care).
“LET GO OF ME!” Suddenly, he throws you to the ground, your back smacking against the dirt and hard stone with such a force that it knocks the breath out of your lungs.
You weakly push yourself up, glaring at the man who opens his mouth to shout at you again, however, the words seem to be stolen from him after he finally gets a good look at you.
Taking his hesitation as your chance for escape, you leap up to your feet and prepare to run off, but once again, you find your wrist captured by the man. Given, this time his grip is looser than it was even if just by a little bit as he kneels down to your height,” hey, where do you think you’re going, huh? You’re Kuncel’s kid, aren’t ya’?”
While your mother’s name leaving his mouth makes you pause your struggle, you still turn to glare at him. Once getting a good look at his face, you can say that he doeslook a little familiar, but you can’t think of a name that matches. Even so, you don’t care. Chances are, he’s just some former client of your mother’s; no one special.
Despite your hostility, the man remains unfazed if not a little astonished, although, you’re sure you’re just imagining the last part,“ see, that look right there tells me you’re Kuncel’s kid…Gotta say, you’ve grown since the last time I saw ya’. What’s your name again?….What? You ain’t deaf, are ya’? Didn’t your mama teach you to answer people when they talk to ya’?”
You hesitate before realizing that he’s never going to let go until you cooperate. In defeat, you mumble you name which he surprisingly hears regardless to how low your voice is.
“And no last name?” You shake your head. Your mother never did tell you if you had a last name. You didn’t even know they were a thing until you were four, having overheard passersby on the street using each other’s first and last names. When you asked, Kuncel said that someone people just don’t have last names which has always been a good enough answer for you.
To your surprise, the man sighs at your answer. You expect him to call you a liar, but it never comes,“…that’s smart. You don’t need it anyways…And what about your brother? You’ve got one, right? Or did he die, too?”
Too? So, this guy knows your mother died? While you don’t question that part too much, you do refuse to answer him about any possible siblings which only manages to frustrate him.
Suddenly standing to his feet, the man turns heel and begins to quite literally drag you behind him,“ fine, don’t answer me, ya’ little brat. I’ll just hand you over to the Military Police. I’m sure they’d love a little thief like you with such an attitude-”
“-No!” You try your best to plant your heels into the ground. While it does nothing to stop yourself from being dragged, the man does at least stop himself, glancing over his shoulder in a bored manner, his eyes alone threating you to either answer his questions or he’ll do just as he previously said.
Stubbornly, you turn you head to the side away from him, staring at the dirt covered ground as you pray you aren’t making a huge mistake,“…he’s at our shelter…”
With that, the man finally let’s go of your wrist in which you rub afterwards, noticing the red mark he’s left. By the time you glance up at him with unspoken hatred, he’s holding his arms out with a snarl,“ now was that so hard, ya’ little brat? Go on, take me to him and no funny business or else it’s straight off to the MP’s for ya’.”
You shifted, slowly blinking open your eyes before sitting up from your ‘bed’. Truthfully, it was only a few blankets laid out on the floor which offered only about two centimeters of cushion against the cold wood below, but you were use to it, after all, when you live in the Underground, one has to be able to adapt to anything.
Rubbing your eyes, you glanced over to your side, pleased to find your little brother still asleep, peacefully curled against you. His small body moved only ever so slightly with each breath he took, breaths that became visible in the air after parting from his lips.
Careful not to wake him, you raise yourself from the ground while providing him with your share of the blanket. Tiptoeing across the cracked wooden floorboards, you made your way into another room, one not much bigger than the closest-like one your brother and you shared.
The door creaked when you pushed it open, presenting an almost pitch dark space. There was only a sliver of light available in which allowed your eyes to adjust just enough to see the outlines of the room’s single bed and the figure sleeping in it. Nevertheless, you had been in the room enough times to memorize its layout even with your eyes closed,“ mama, it’s morning. Time to wake up.”
There was no answer from the woman. She laid motionlessly on her back with her face pointed towards the ceiling, eyes and cheeks hallow from hunger yet her face perfectly peaceful otherwise. It was a sharp contrast to the way it had been twisted in pain for the last month since she had fallen ill. As happy as you were to see her finally relaxed after so much suffering, she was too still for your liking.
“Mama?” You placed a hand to her cheek, hoping the action would stir her awake, however, deep down you knew even before you felt the coldness of her skin that such hope was useless. Slowly, you moved your hand to her mouth, hearing nor feeling no soft blow that would normally being rising up from her lungs. You let your hand fall back to your side,“…oh…”
You weren’t quite sure how long you stood here, staring down at your mother softly as your mind swirled with thoughts. She had been sick for a little over a month. Even though she assured you it wasn’t anything too serious, you smarter than that despite your young age. Given your living condition and her line of work, it was bound to happen one way or another. Perhaps that’s why you couldn’t force yourself to be surprised. Regardless…it hurt. It hurt more than your mind could even begin to comprehend in the moment.
“(Y/n)…?” That was enough to snap you out of your trace. Your head spun to look at the small child who stood in the doorway, his tiny fist rubbing the sleep away from his eyes,“ is mama feeling better today?”
You took long strives to him, making sure not to walk too quick to cause concern yet quickly enough to scoop him up in your arms and carry him away from a possibly traumatizing sight. Luckily for you, sleep still fogged his mind, the warmth of your body commanding him to rest his head against your shoulder which gave you the time needed to shut the door behind yourself, never to be opened by either of you again.
“A little bit, but she still needs her rest, so we have to make sure she gets it, okay?” You rubbed his back before setting him back on your shared pile of blankets,“ in the meantime, mama has a game for us.”
“What kind?” He blinked his eyes a few times, finally waking up enough thanks to his childish curiosity.
“She wants us to go on an adventure through town…” you thought for a moment before adding,“ and be like little soldiers.”
While you began to gather the few belongings you owned, Levi frowned with narrowed eyes,“ why would mama want us to be like those bastards?”
“Levi,” you sent him a halfhearted glare, knowing deep down you couldn’t be too mad. It wasn’t his fault the two for you had been exposed to such fowl language.
“B-But they’re so mean, (Y/n)! They treat us like trash and we’re not!”
“The Military Police’s do, yeah, but not all soldiers are like that. They aren’t supposed to anyways,” you sighed, folding some clothes and setting them in the center of a laid out blanket before searching for something to eat,“ in fact, I heard some men at the market once talking about a group of soldiers called the Survey Corps.”
“How could they be any different?”
“Well, they’re more heroic than the MP’s because I heard…” you kneeled next to him, looking around cautiously before whispering in his ear,“… they actually go outside the Walls and fight Titans.”
Levi looked to you with wide eyes, his voice of whisper of disbelief,“ no way.”
“Yes way,” you chuckled, handing Levi a small piece of bread. Even though it was rather stale, he didn’t think twice about stuffing it into his mouth after his stomach growled with hunger.
“'at’s just st'id,” he commented while chewing.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, Levi.”
He shallowed, going quiet for a moment before asking,“…so how’s the game work?”
“Well, we’re gonna pretend to be Survey Corps soldiers. Mama is our commander and has sent us on a mission outside the Walls which will be in town. All the grow ups will be titans, so we have to avoid them as much as possible, okay?” Levi hung onto your every word, nodding as he took another bite of bread,“ our goal is to find a new land completely safe from titans.”
“When are we going?”
“Now, so let’s hurry up and get ready. We still need to pack all of our supplies. Make sure to grab anything you want. We’ll be outside the Walls for awhile.”
“Okay!” He was quick to jump up, hurrying to help gather everything you two had which wasn’t difficult considering neither of you owned much. You both only had a few pairs of clothes each which were passed down from your mother as well as a few blankets, a small supply of food, and a tiny stuffed animal you had found Levi two weeks ago when you had gone outside to get food when your mother was too sick to. Once everything was together, you tied the edges of the blanket together into a makeshift bag.
“I’m gonna go say 'goodbye’ to mama real fast,” while you worked, Levi went to run towards her bedroom door only for you to quickly snatch his wrists, pulling him back a bit too harshly which you regretted, although, you didn’t have time to worry over it for too long.
“Levi, wait!” You frowned at the confused look he gave you,“ um…r-remember, mama needs to rest. She might not be able to go back to sleep if you wake her up.”
“Oh…okay!” much to your relief, Levi didn’t question you any further, instead smiling as he took your hand.
After a quick peak outside to ensure no one was around to give either of you trouble, you turned to Levi with the most convincing smile you could muster,“ are you ready, soldier?”
He nodded eagerly, gripping your hand a bit tighter as the two of you exited your old home for, unknowingly to Levi, the last time. You only looked back once, a part of you begging to run back just in case there was a small chance your mother would wake up to wonder where you two were…but you knew that was wishful thinking. She was gone and no amount of wishing would bring her back. What you needed to focus on instead was keeping your little brother safe. From that day on, he was the only family you had left. You’d be damned if you ever let anything happen to him.
Of course I made too much of a deal about the date night. Too much anxiety.
It was a wonderful evening. And followed pretty much the usual script: start at the bar, move to the lounge, sit far apart, sit closer, subtle touching of the shoulder/arm/leg, kiss on the cheek, blow job in the parking lot…
KIDDING!
There was no blow job. We had a wonderful conversation and snuggled on a couch. We did get beyond the innuendo and agree that there is a sexual attraction there. So that was good. I dig her.
But…
I worry that she’s going to get too attached. They jumped into the lifestyle by getting into a six-year relationship with another couple, which evidently ended poorly because of attachments and jealousy. We are definitely not looking for anything serious. I think I have made that clear to her. I know that my spouse has made that clear to her spouse.
Speaking of the spouses: they had their date night last night. While it was going on, I was completely cool with it. Now I knew there was no hall pass, so maybe that was a part of my ease, but I never even wondered to what level of touching or kissing they got to. And I didn’t ask when she got home. As long as she is happy, I am happy.
And she is happy. She likes him.
I think that the four of us are going to hang together soon. Maybe as soon as tonight.
Yep. You might say she got really attached. Sorry not sorry.
If you want to come up with the most on-brand thing that could happen to me on this trip, “picking a fight with the tour guide at the V&A because they were spouting inaccurate myths about corset history” is… yeah.
*kick door open* Hey guy I’m back with more love letter fan art! I’m a bit obsessed I admit. I just really, really, like the designs. This time with the love interest (I’m not calling him senpai, still waiting for the name :( )
I like to think he would be into gardening (or in the school gardening club).
Let me tell you something: I LOVE Orson’s nose. I have loved Orson’s nose for almost as long as I’ve loved Orson. Since, in fact, the second film I saw him in (The Lady From Shanghai). I hadn’t realised, watching the first (Jane Eyre) that it was not his nose.
Let me tell you something else: I love Orson’s stories, but I don’t always believe them. And so what more lunatic better project than a study of all his film noses, just to see if he’s actually telling the truth, here.
Here is the full thing in all its insanity glory just in case you should ever need it. Or if you want to choose an Orson film to watch to celebrate his birthday.
My favorite thing about Tumblr is that even though I’m here for the porn, I still end up learning all kinds of random shit about movies and science and history.
Thinking about how Graendal really is just wot’s Human Pet Guy but as a hot blonde woman with huge tits. And she’s also like a super genius. Unleashing her into the public consciousness is going to do soo much damage.
