I’m back with another form of Dissociation: Dissociative Amnesia. You may commonly ask yourself why you can’t remember things? Or do you have memory loss? These could be signs of dissociative amnesia, a common type of dissociation that differs from other types like maladaptive daydreaming, depersonalization and derealization. In this video I’m talking you through what is dissociative amnesia, types of dissociative amnesia and treatment of dissociative amnesia. What is Dissociative Amnesia & and what are the treatment options? Frequently I am asked questions like this: Why can’t I remember my childhood? What does it mean that I don’t remember? Does trauma cause memory loss?
In this video I’m talking you through what dissociative identity disorder is, what the symptoms of DID are, what dissociative identity disorder looks like in your daily life and then how to manage it. If you’re looking for support on dissociative identity disorder, or dissociation in general, this video is a good start for understanding DID from a mental health perspective.
Looks like We’re back to making posts that We don’t remember. No big deal but then…
WHO THE FUCK?! Dude! Not cool. Let’s not be flirting even mock flirting (because I can’t imagine any of us trying to actually flirt with anyone… Well…) because We don’t need that kind of attention. Please. The only one We can think of that would say that is dormant. So??? No idea.
Been losing so much time. Thursday was a continuation of Wednesday. It was Wednesday until it was Friday. There was no Thursday. But it was Wednesday that didn’t start until Thursday. The Thursday that never happened. We probably shouldn’t have Ativan anymore. I forget that We used to black out from Ativan and alcohol. Maybe We are more sensitive in our current condition. We had the outsider hold on to our Ativan for us. Because We knew that We couldn’t trust ourself in the state We’ve been in. Yesterday We asked him for our medicine. He said He gave it to us and that We said that We didn’t need him to hold on to it anymore because We wouldn’t need it anymore…???!!! It wasn’t Teen. It wasn’t Animal. It wasn’t Malice and it sure as fuck wasn’t The Gobos! So who was it? We suffered full amnesia! This isn’t our norm or at least it hasn’t been in a long time. And We’ve been hallucinating. Full, head on hallucinations. That is also not our norm. Not since We were a child. Visual, auditory and tactile hallucinations. We look at our “Trip Check Painting” and the shadows move like We’re on LSD. But We haven’t taken LSD in about a week. We don’t know what this means. But it seems like when We push and stress for an entire semester, by the end of it, something happens to our mental state. We pushed ourself hard, not even this hard but hard enough to cause a state of psychosis in 2019. The last day of class or the very next day, don’t clearly remember, Teen tried to kill the vessel. It was a very serious attempt. And he very nearly succeeded. Was almost rushed to another hospital for a liver transplant but our levels suddenly started coming down. Waking up in the hospital… Never hallucinated that bad in our entire life. A dark shaking figure stood in the corner of our “room”. The walls had weird writing all over them and were moving. Everything had a yellow tint to it.
We are not suicidal. But We are not okay. We do not believe that We are a risk to ourself or anyone else. Other than a possible accidental overdose! That Ativan shit is scary! If We try really hard, We can see someone dropping one of the pills in the trash accidentally then popped the last… 3??? In our mouth. If there were more in there We don’t know if, whoever that was, would have taken all of it.
We did well in Music Theory 101. We did not great at all on our project but ended up getting a 90 on it! Our average was an 89 but when We checked, our overall grade is a 99 point… Something. Can’t really remember but a fucking 99??!! How? Since March We’ve been doing horribly! When We submitted our final project We also wrote a little over 300 words vaguely explaining why We submitted such hot garbage. He wrote back telling me that he thought We were doing well and that he could tell how much work We put in all of our work. After our presentation he clapped…??? We thought he was gonna be like, “Wtf is this?” Even though he did let us know where We fucked up he still seemed to understand that We did know the material We were just having a bad time. None of us saw that coming.
So why are We starting to spiral? Is this just what a burnout feels like for us now? Is there something seriously wrong? We don’t know yet. Hopefully this fades with some rest.
Holy fuck! Memory unlocked, boys! Okay so We acted a little bit in high school and don’t remember… Anyway We were REALLY GOOD! And We were just thinking, “Oh shit! This is probably why!” THEN We remembered being on stage when We were 16 years old. But We remember like We’re watching from THE AUDIENCE! We can see ourself on stage in costume! Who the fuck was Juliet? Oh and We also just remembered a full switch happening when We were 17 years old. Whoever was acting host thought they still had control. They absolutely did not. And they did feel strange but didn’t know why. They thought they were just playing around. But they became something completely different…
ableists will see a post discussing memory issues and in a fit of unbearable rage they will yell and cry and scream “but ur not trying hard enough!!! but if u cared u would have remembered!! if u forgot something its ur fault!! u should have done something to remember!! u should have just written it down!! u didnt even try to remember!!” and all of us with memory issues are just sitting here with our 20 daily alarms, calendars fills with reminders, notes weve written for ourselves, and countless personal techniques for trying to remember things like
LITERALLY been told ‘there’s no way you can’t remember’ bestie i dont even know where i am most of the time and i forget people’s faces as soon as i haven’t seen them for a few days!!! if i don’t constantly keep every tiny memory evoking object and take pictures ppl will disappear from my brain!!!
