#gen z post

“My cat stole my balls”

“Fake balls??”

“No, my tennis balls”

Teacher: are you eating dry cereal in my class?

Student, holding a bunch of cereal in his hands: maybe

Teacher: it’s making loud crunch sounds so you need to stop

Student: okay sorry

Teacher: what cereal is that anyway?

Student, after pausing to think about it for a long time: I don’t know, they’re circles

Teacher: …Cheerios?

Student: probably?

Teacher: I worry about your generation sometimes

“Simply become a prostitute until you have enough money to hire a hitman to kill all of your clients”

*softly* “No.”

“WHY IS THERE BLOOD ON THE WALL?!”

“THAT’S FAKE BLOOD DUH THE CONTAINER IS RIGHT THERE”

“Why are you dressed up as Captain America at nine am on a Friday!?”