#gen z experience
RIP 2 My Youth
Guys what happemns when 2 penises find each other on omegle? Does one of them skip? Do they feel harrassed? Or do they just like…hang out
Gen-z’s version of “can I get your number?”, is “what’s your switch code?”
Cant tell me otherwise.
“you need to write something you would change about your performance, it’s called self reflection -”
“WELL I’M LOOKING AT MYSELF AND I LOOK GREAT”
research teacher to a random kid: you get infected and die happy birthday by the way
this isnt an exact conversation but.
one time i (jokingly!!) told my friend she would die of scurvy if she didn’t eat more vegetables and she believed me and got really scared and ate wayyy too many vegetables,
but then she got a cold or something and googled her symptoms and went “oh my god i think i have scurvy” and i thought she was joking and i was like “yea ur gonna die” BUT SHE BELIEVED ME and actually thought she was gonna die of scurvy
“My cat stole my balls”
“Fake balls??”
“No, my tennis balls”
A conversation between myself and my best friend:
Us: *sitting in his car eating those little orange slice fruit cups*
Me: when we were younger, my sister and I used to pretend these we slugs. I dont know why but we loved the idea of eating little cups of slugs
Him: I ate a worm when I was 11
Him: and now I’m lactose intolerant
Me: are you implying that the worm made you lactose intolerant?
Him: I ate a worm and now milk makes me throw up, what other conclusion do you expect me to come to???
Him: this is the first thing I’ve eaten today
Me: ?!?!?!?!?!? We offered to buy you dinner tonight and you refused and said you ate leftovers?!?!?!?!?!?
Him: I got busy and forgot
Me: …
Him: I had a coffee this morning
Me: … *runs back into the grocery store to forcibly buy him a sandwich*
“Travis Konecny is the love of my life”
“Travis Konecny is a feral racoon of a hockey player, GET YOU SOME STANDARDS, CHILD”
the rudy and bob show
there are these two people in my class. let’s name them rudy and bob.
at my school we could choose where we wanted to eat lunch ie. we could eat in either the cafeteria downstairs or in a classroom.
most of the popular (read: snobby) kids would eat in the cafeteria, so that left us weird shits in the classroom.
rudy and bob got really bored one day, because without the popular kids, there wasn’t a lot of drama. so they decided to do something.
one day, they walk up to the front of the class and write on the whiteboard: THE RUDY AND BOB SHOW!!!
basically what they did was reenact music videos of songs, including singing and background dancers and shit, with two people.
they even accepted music video requests. so one day, someone obviously requested senorita.
if you haven’t watched the music vid, it’s really sensual and stuff.
AND RUDY AND BOB SAID YES.
so, on that fateful day, we all left our lunches at our desks, circled up our chairs, and watched this go down.
it was honestly one of the funniest things i’ve ever seen.
Teacher: are you eating dry cereal in my class?
Student, holding a bunch of cereal in his hands: maybe
Teacher: it’s making loud crunch sounds so you need to stop
Student: okay sorry
Teacher: what cereal is that anyway?
Student, after pausing to think about it for a long time: I don’t know, they’re circles
Teacher: …Cheerios?
Student: probably?
Teacher: I worry about your generation sometimes
my friends support me wanting to become a cryptid
teacher:pleasedonot pee on your wounds
In class learning about vaccines and polio and all that jazz:
Student 1: Idk, testing out a potentially deadly vaccine on 1.3 million small children sounds… not great morally
Student 2: right but isn’t polio a thing that kids get? So they would need to test it on kids because they’re the ones who get polio
Student 1: no, I’m pretty sure polio comes back as an adult, doesn’t it?
Student 3: yeah, there’s polio and then if you survive that you get Polio 2: Electric Boogaloo
well, you know, i like to eat my eyeballs how i like to eat my sushi: with soy sauce and chopsticks
*sounds of the kid who decided wearing an inflatable dinosaur costume for mufty day getting beaten up grow louder*
(me. it was me.)
“I’m a beautiful melon person.”
“I think you mean ‘American.’”
Kid 1: “judge Judy!”
Kid 2: “no no no we’re going for dead people remember?”
Kid 3: “I dunno I think we can make that happen…”
Teacher: “are you guys talking about assassinating judge judy?!?!?!”
*as they go under a bar*
“yeah, I go over easily because I’m tall, you’re more of an under person”
“…Did you just call me a bottom?”
I didn’t catch the rest of the rest of the sentence, but I overheard “…that was before Kmart was a thing, and before I knew gravity falls even existed.”
“Simply become a prostitute until you have enough money to hire a hitman to kill all of your clients”
*softly* “No.”
