Happy Hobbit Day to all the amazing hobbits out there! Such amazing and lovely creatures do more than deserve a day for they own! And I hope that The Shire will always be there to us even if our feet cannot stand there again.
Happy Tolkien Tuesday! It’s also the first day of the #circleofbookishfriends August Awesome Author challenge I’m co hosting with @authormichaelreidjr ☕️✍ This month is all about the authors, less about individual books. I’m really excited about it. How cute is my postcard and the Prancing Pony bookmark? I have really loved my 3 month term as a rep for @riddlesteashoppe so much so, I will always be a fan and a customer! Juli is choosing new reps today so good luck to all who entered! ☕️ #bookstagram #tolkien #tolkientuesday #lotr #hobbits #hobbitstyle #bookstack #booksandcoffee #postcard #bookmark #bibliophile #lordoftherings
also consider: LOTR but hobbits have Tapeta Lucidum
Boromir gets the fright of his life their first night on the road
Boromir: *glances over his shoulder* ??!!!!???!!
Hobbits:
Hobbits: what
i will never get over that you used an image of raccoons for this purpose because it is incredibly accurate
LOTR au but instead of hobbits literally raccoons
Gandalf: well this raccoon found the ring and has been carrying it around. unfortunately we can’t take it off him or he gets very bite-y. so I figure, the raccoon is the ringbearer now
Elrond: what are those other three raccoons doing here
Gandalf: he brought his buddies. I call this one ‘Merry’
Aragorn: *watching Frodo & Sam scamper off in the direction of Mordor* our hopes lie with those raccoons now
Legolas: do they… know where they are going
Aragorn: I sure hope so
Faramir: father why is this raccoon in the livery of the citadel
Denethor: haha doesn’t he look precious
Elfhelm: Dernhelm, is that a raccoon in your bag?
Dernhelm: *sweating nervously* Uh no, sir.
Eowyn, later: And I said no, you know, like a liar.
Denethor: WHY did you let a raccoon go off with the Ring??
Faramir: ….it just seemed like the right thing to do
Gandalf: he scratched you up real good huh
Faramir: ……………gouged my FUCKING arm and bit me on my face
Witch King: no living man can kill me - AUGH FUCK, RACCOON, RACCOON ON MY LEG ARGHHHH
Eowyn: *stab*
Wraiths break into the room at the prancing pony: *UnHoLy ScReEcHiNg*
Trash Panda Hobbits:
Wraiths: Oh, what the fuck, whAT THE FUCKIS THAT?!
Treebeard: Baroom, humm, where are my small, impatient friends?
Merry and Pippin:
Don’t go where I can’t follow, Mr. Frodo.
~~~~~~The Hobbitinterlude~~~~~~
Thorin: You’re the burgular.Go on and…burgle something! Bilbo:
Saruman: Well since some fucking TREES took over Isengard I guess I’ll take over The Shire. Farmer Maggot and ever other Halfling down to the Sacksville-Bagginses:
Book Frodo: linguistics nerd, hoards books, thinks he is very smart, acts chill but is actually stressed out 100% of the time, will infodump at you about elvish poetry
Film Frodo: Some kind of hipster, probably has anxiety, Elijah Wood’s Beautiful Blue Eyes, has bruises he doesn’t remember getting bcos he’s a clumsy fuck, too good for this sinful (middle) earth
Book Sam: cries when overwhelmed, writes poetry (but is too embarrassed to show it to anyone), Soft ™, drinks beer directly out of the tap, made of feelings and determination, basically a humanoid golden retriever
Film Sam: winner of world’s biggest Dad Friend award, smacks orcs w a frying pan, loves bacon, has accidentally punched self in face at least once, (ง •̀_•́)ง
Book Merry: acts like a jaded elderly man even though he’s the hobbit equivalent of like 22, fantasises about being a Brave Knight so he can protect his friends, Brandybuck Pride!!, loves pipeweed to a near sexual degree
Film Merry: definitely a stoner, steals vegetables, says ‘fight me’ to people twice his size, Sarcasm is his primary weapon, can eat his own weight in ham
Book Pippin: baby bi, Smol, has 0 impulse control, calls everyone ‘fellow’, does not listen when people talk to him because he is thinking about sandwiches
hobbits: tiny houses, oversized sweaters, a good book, introverts, writing, gardening, staying up to watch the sunset, fuzzy socks, nice food, tending to keep things to yourself, playing instruments, just wants to live a peaceful life
dwarves: nights out with friends, lives out of spite, really stubborn, sneaking out of your window at 1am, loves animals more than their family, hot chocolate, karaoke parties, road trips, summer nights, cunning folk, believes in old legends
elves: getting lost in the woods, loves photography, wants to travel the world, neat notes, pretty handwriting, athletic, loves fashion, love astrology, curious, hunting, wolves, the smell of wet grass, very artistic, easily embarrassed
humans: messy bun, staying up til midnight, too little sleep, writing poems, loud laughs, loves music, camping, in love with the way nature works, driving at sunsets, determined, a bit of a mess, german shepherds, eye gazes
hobbits: oversized sweaters, honey, listening to music, traditional, flower fields, animals over humans, sunrises, finds nostalgia in everything, books, the joy of youth, old folklore, loves to paint, homemade meals, plants, thick socks
elves: mythology, loves nature, sharp features, ancient forests, loves to learn, intimidating, sharp tongued, archery, freckles, old notebooks, cottage in the woods, perfectionists, very determined, humour that only they get, autumn
dwarves: bruised knuckles, eye-rolls, either sleep for the week or sleep is for the weak, great music taste, extremely passionate, smarter than you’d think, abandoned cities, alcohol, doesn’t care about opinions, competitiveness
humans: always searching for adventure, messy hair, loud music, random road trips, loyal to the people they love, fire, midnight hours, black coffee, hates humanity, procrastinators, dad jokes, bloody noses, courageous, kind
