EngIta Week 2022

Day 4: Fantasy/Mythical Creatures

Warning: Other than inaccurate descriptions of witch hunters there’s really nothing. Unless you count being super mushy and soft.

~~~~~

The dark streets of Venice were quiet save for the occasional muffled sound of music and people from nearby restaurants. The dark night sky was decorated with shining stars and a bright full moon as a small shape went strolling down the streets. The small form was that of a cat with strange curl and closed eyes. The feline made its way down the stone streets, sticking close to the waterways. It paid no mind to the restaurants it passed nor the people who were out this late at night. It had only one goal in mind and it refused to be deterred from it. Disappearing from the streetlights the white and brown feline continued on towards its destination, passing by many things until it finally started to reach the outskirts of Venice.

The cat let out a small meow of joy and began to walk faster than it did while in the city. After a few minutes of walking through the tall grass and being guided by the pale moonlight it finally reached its destination. There sitting before him was a house. The small little place had a large garden on the side of it, its brick walls covered in vines and flowers. Magic seemed to cover the place from prying eyes, like a curtain hiding it from the world. The windows were lit up with lights from the inside, and a lone figure passed by one of them. The feline let out a loud meow and practically ran towards the house. Reaching its old, oak door the small animal began to scratch at it, meowing as loudly as it could.

The sounds of footsteps approaching the front door could be heard inside before the large door opened up. Warm light poured onto the doorstep illuminating the small feline’s body and the person’s body.

“Ah, you’re here! I was starting to worry about you, come inside you silly little thing. You’ll get sick if you remain outside.”

The person, a man said his tone short and welcoming. The cat let out a happy meow and quickly made its way inside. Once in the man shut the door and locked it. The inside of the house was full of different plants and old books as well as other little trinkets. A large fireplace sat in the living room and the kitchen was full of all sorts of books and pans and other things. The man made his way towards there giving the cat a look.

“It’s a good thing you came back home at the time you did. I was just about to make dinner.”

The man said his British accent coming through. The Brit went towards the kitchen island were a large cookbook already sat there waiting to be used as well as the ingredients. The man went to get started on chopping the vegetables, not bothering to look back at the feline he’d let inside his home. As he cut through the carrots and celery he felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist.

“Ve~ I’m glad that I made it home then. I love helping you with dinner mi amore~”

A smooth, affectionate Italian voice spoke into his ear. The man shivered at the close proximity.

“Well…..yes it really was a good thing…..considering that I enjoy it as well….”

The man mumbled his pale cheeks turning a lovely rose color. The other man felt a smile come onto his face as he hugged the smaller man closer to him.

“You’re really are too sweet for your own good Arthur. Makes me want to kiss you.”

The Italian cooed as he began to nuzzle the other man, Arthur’s neck. Arthur stiffened at the affection, his face turning darker as he tried to find a response.

“Oi, you can’t just blurt things out like that-! It’s distracting, I’m trying to cut the vegetables- FELI-!”

Arthur yelped as he felt the man behind him, Feli trail kisses on his neck. Feli seemed to not care too much enjoying the flustered reaction of his treasure.

“Feliciano Vargas so help me, if you don’t cut it out now I’ll hex you!”

Arthur said trying to sound stern but it was clear that the affection that he was receiving was making him melt. Feliciano gave another small kiss on his neck before finally letting him go.

“Alright you win mi tereso. I’ll let you finish what you were doing.”

Feli said leaning against the counter. Arthur seemed to flounder a bit before pulling himself together. With a small half hearted glare the Englishman continued to do his original task. As Arthur cut Feliciano began to watch him, obversing him. The warm yellow lights of the kitchen shined down on him, making his blonde hair look golden. Beautiful green eyes honed in on his hands, keeping a focused look on his cutting. Smooth ivory skin stretched over thin yet sturdy muscle and a sharp yet gentle face, decorated with light freckles. Thin hands worked diligently on their task, seemingly moving on their own. Feliciano couldn’t help but get lost in the sight before him. Even after centuries of being with this man, the sight of him always took his breath away.

Feliciano could still remember the first time he’d ever met Arthur. The memory crystal clear despite it having been so long. It’d been during the medieval times of Italy and England. A time when people like him and Arthur were hunted for sport or burned at the stake. After all witches and mages and anything unnatural were condemned for being born that way. Feliciano had been caught by these witch hunters, forced into a small cage and left to wait in fear of his fate and impending death. The Italian was to be burned at the stake in a few days, having been found guilty of performing witchcraft. When in reality the young man was only a shapeshifter of sorts, a familiar with no witch counterpart. Feliciano had been so scared, stuck in his feline body and at the mercy of those who captured him. He was so sure he was going to die that day when a miracle had happened. The group of witch hunters had been attacked, destroyed by a small coven of witches and mages. And the leader of that coven was Arthur.

The Englishman had been one of the few magic users who refused to let their fellow witches and mages suffer. He along with several others had raided different witch hunting groups and set free those who had been caught by them. And it was during one of his raids that Feliciano had first laid eyes on him. He still remembered how awed he was by the mage, his green eyes fierce and full of magic and power. His dark forest green cloak blowing behind him in the wind, making him look even more rugged and otherworldly than he already was. Arthur hadn’t wasted any time as he’d let Feliciano out of his small prison, allowing him to return to his human form. Gentle yet firm hands began to look over him for possible injuries.

“Are you alright lad? Did they hurt you?”

Arthur had asked concerned for the younger man’s well being. Feliciano looked up at him and felt his heart skip at the sight before him. The sudden need to be with this wild and untamed mage with the kind green eyes began to overwhelm him and at that moment Feli had realized that he’d found him. He’d finally found the counterpart to his familiar magic.

“Tereso I will follow you till the end of time. This I swear.”

Feliciano had said, sincere and not even bothering to answer Arthur’s questions. The Italian was going to do whatever it took to keep this mage safe, even if it meant dying for him. Arthur had been baffled by him and at the beginning wasn’t very nice to him. But as they went through their years together and had gotten to know one another Arthur had slowly but surely began to accept his companionship. And it wasn’t long before the mage and the familiar ended up in an area that was less than platonic. For centuries afterwards they remained by each other’s sides, and fell deeper and deeper in love with each other. The flames that burned within them refusing to die even after all those years.

“Oi, why are you staring at me like that?”

Arthur’s voice called Feli back from his reminiscing. The Italian blinked and looked at Arthur seeing the concerned look on his face, his cutting all but forgotten. Feliciano gave him a small loving smile, touched by the concern even after all these years. Pushing himself from the counter Feli went to stand in front of Arthur, somewhat trapping the shorter man between him and the island. Arthur blushed lightly confusion in his eyes.

“Forgive me mi amore, I just got caught up in the beautiful sight that is you.”

Feliciano said his voice smooth and low. Arthur sucked in a sharp breath his face once again turning red.

“Shush you smooth talker.”

Arthur said his voice a bit flustered making Feli’s smile grow. The Italian cupped one of Arthur’s pale cheeks and caressed it gently.

“I only speak the truth. You are the most beautiful sight I’ve ever laid eyes on. Every time I look at you, from the moment I’d first laid eyes on you, I’ve fallen in love with you over and over again.”

Feliciano said his face leaning in towards the shorter man. Arthur’s face filled with a small look of affection and longing, his nose barely touching Feliciano’s.

“You are the most sappest man I’d ever met. Yet I too feel the same way and I’ll continue to fall in love with you till the end of time and even beyond.”

Arthur said softly, shy and sincere. Feli felt his heart race at the words, love and affection welling up inside him. A feeling that would forever belong to Arthur Kirkland and to Arthur alone. Feliciano leaned in and Arthur went to meet him, their lips meeting in a loving kiss. The Italian sighed softly into it, pulling Arthur closer to him. Arthur’s arms came to wrap around Feliciano’s shoulders, melting into the kiss. It was magical, it was addictive to kiss the mage in his arms. Centuries of kisses shared between them and Feli could never get enough of them. The two continued with their kiss before finally pulling apart from each other breathless. Feliciano felt his breath catch at the sight before him. Arthur’s lips were slightly red, his eyes dark and full of longing and love for him. His freckled cheeks a beautiful ruby hue that was only meant for him. The sight made Feli breathless, it made him want to keep the mage all to himself in every way possible. Before Feliciano could even think it through his heart spoke for him.

“Marry me.”

Feliciano breathed making Arthur go wide eyed.

“W-what?”

The mage said his tone soft and shocked. Feli gazed at him, his amber eyes honest and full of determination.

“Marry me. I love you Arthur Kirkland, I have loved you for centuries and I will love you forever and always. I want to have you in every way that a man could possibly have the one they love. So please……marry me.”

The Italian said his tone soft and full of devotion. The Englishman stared at him, his gaze filling with tears and overwhelming love for the man in front of him. Letting out a wet laugh Arthur pulled Feliciano back into him.

“You’re crazy, absolutely off your rocker. Bloody hell yes, I’ll marry you you absolute insane yet sweet man you.”

Arthur said choking slightly through his happy tears. The Englishman let out a gasp as Feliciano picked him up and twirled them around, kissing every part of him that he could. Arthur let out a small laugh at the kisses before grabbing his cheeks and pulling him into a proper one. Feliciano kissed him back his heart full and his entire being singing with unbridled love and affection. He was going to marry the man who held his heart. Marry the mage who saved him all those years ago and who stuck with him for better or worse. Arthur Kirkland was his completely.

The mage and familiar remained like this, forgetting about dinner completely and getting lost in one another. They’d always be with one another till the end of time, and they wouldn’t have it any other way.

*Fluff makes the brain go bleh shshshdh. I surprisingly had a somewhat difficult time with this one considering that the one story I’ve got going on involving fantasy is still ongoing and I lowkey don’t wanna put all of my possibly good ideas out yet lol. So I went with a Mage Arthur and his Familiar Feli. There wasn’t much magic in this other than the magic of love and sappiness shsgsdehdhs. I apologize if this sucks lol. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!! And here’s prompt four @engitaweek2022!!!*

EngIta Week 2022

Day 3: Hurt/Comfort

Warning: Sad times, kinda depressing at some points but it’ll get better I promise.

~~~~~

Why was one afraid to fall?

Why was one afraid to jump head first into things?

Many would say that it was because of the fear of dying or the fear of falling in general. But for Arthur the fear of falling was entirely different. Falling was easy, the ground would give way under you and you’d be powerless to do anything. You’d just have to let gravity take you and hope that you landed on the ground gently. Those were things that didn’t really make Arthur afraid of it. No the fear for him was the landing, the aftermath so to speak of doing the act. That was what he feared the most. It was the fear of the unknown after the fall that kept him away from others. It was the reason why he never allowed anyone too close to him.

But there were times when even his best efforts would prove to be futile.

This was one of those moments.

It’d started small, just a polite hello here and there to his fellow nation. An attempt at making peace with the terrified Italian nation known as Italy to help ease the tensions in the world meetings. Then those small attempts turned into small awkward smiles at one another whenever they’d see one another. Acknowledging the somewhat tense peace that was slowly beginning to form between them. Yet never did either attempt to cross a line, neither wanting to leave the comfortable places that they were in nor wanting to ruin the peace. It remained this way for a long time, and Arthur was fine with that. He didn’t mind that they didn’t interact with one another. Just as long as he and Italy had some kind of peaceful truce then he was perfectly okay with it. And Italy was just as fine with it.

Until one day he’d decided to do the unthinkable.

One moment an invisible barrier sat between them, fragile yet effective. Then the next thing Arthur knew the usually cowardly Italian nation completely wrecked the barrier. No longer did the safe space between them exist. No instead a sudden close exposure was in its place with Italy making it become a reality. The once peaceful existence Arthur had was disrupted by Italy. No longer did the English nation know peace, no instead he was suddenly constantly bothered by Italy. What fear and anxiety he once had for the older nation was now nonexistent. Instead in their place where small smiles and light conversations. Arthur at first tried to deflect from his advances, spooked by the sudden change between them. Doing whatever he could to dissuade the chipper Italian from pursuing his sudden need to talk and interact. Yet with each attempt he threw at him Italy completely overcame them. It confused and irritated him and he began to curse himself for starting things between them.

After all Italy suddenly taking an interest in him and trying to spend time with him had not been his intention. Yet it was the result he’d gotten. For a brief period of time it continued on like that, Arthur desperately trying to avoid the attempts of Italy and Italy being scarily hellbent on continuing his pursuits. Until finally Arthur had snapped and given in.

“Fine! If it’ll get you to give me a moment of peace then I’ll hang out with you! Happy???”

Arthur had practically snarled it, his gaze hard and full of irritation. He was expecting Italy to finally leave him alone at the snarl, for him to run away as he once did crying for Germany or Japan in his fear. But to the Brit’s shock Italy had only given him a beaming smile.

“Ve~ Thank you England! We’re going to have a lot of fun trust me!”

Italy had chirped happily oblivious to the mental whiplash Arthur was going through. After that it was like a river had been unleashed. Arthur soon found himself spending time with Italy, sitting by him for meetings and having him come over to his house and he to Italy’s. Small awkward conversations became more smooth and honest between them, late nights on the phone talking to one another and sharing meals and other things with one another. Before Arthur realized it Italy had become a large part of his life, a close friend that the Englishman could rely on. A trustworthy companion who would always have his back, a shoulder to lean on and a voice of reason he could trust. It was perfect, it was easy to fall into to. Being with Italy was as easy as breathing and he wouldn’t trade it for the world. Arthur should have known better than to think that it’d always remain this way.

He should have known that he’d mess it all up eventually.

It was like any other day. Arthur had been invited by Italy to come to Venice and spend time with him. And Arthur had agreed, itching to get out of his large empty house and dark skies to have a bit of sunshine. When he’d gotten there Italy had been there to greet him, a bright smile on his face as he rushed to tackle him into a hug. Giving Arthur two kisses on his cheeks in greeting Italy led him away from the station and the two began their day of relaxation. They went through the bright sunny streets of Venice, talking about anything that came to them and enjoying the sights of the glorious city. It was during this that Arthur began to notice things. As Italy chatted away about his newest pasta recipe, Arthur found himself staring at the taller male. Bright auburn hair shined in the sunshine, reflecting its rays in an array of reds and browns. Tanned skin stretched over smooth muscles as he moved his hands in excitement. Closed eyes crinkled in the corners of his face as he smiled and talked, painting a majestic picture. It was at that moment that Arthur realized that Italy was beautiful. The Englishman was hypnotized by the sight, his eyes never leaving Italy’s frame. His heart gave a funny pitter patter in his chest as he stared, his expression soft and open unknowingly.

‘God I love you.’

The thought came slamming Arthur out of his gazing. His breath came in a sharp gasp, and his chest constricted tightly in shock and disbelief. His body came to a complete halt stumped by the sudden affection and honesty in the thought. Arthur felt his hands shake lightly and break out into a sweat as he realized to his horror that he had meant it. Suddenly everything seemed so much more clearer and much more terrifying in that moment. The longing he felt whenever he didn’t hear from the Italian for a long time, the pure joy and happiness he felt whenever he was with him. The feeling he got when he heard Italy laugh at something he’d said, the butterflies he got whenever Italy would smile at him. Suddenly it all made sense, like a puzzle that Arthur hadn’t realized was incomplete now finally having its pieces in the right places.

Arthur Kirkland, the living embodiment of England was in love with Italy.

And with that fact came the soul crushing terror that nearly made him stumble. Arthur never wanted to be in this position, he never even imagined that he’d end up here. He couldn’t be in love with Italy. Being in love with Italy meant that he had already unknowingly took the leap. Being in love with Italy meant that he was falling with no safety net, at the mercy of gravity and its aftermath of when he finally landed. The Englishman was so busy having his mental breakdown that the feeling of a firm but warm hand on his arm nearly made him jump out of his skin. Snapping back into the reality around him he nearly sucked in a sharp breath at the close face that clouded his vision. Italy was staring at him, his eyebrows furrowed in concern as he held onto Arthur.

“England are you alright? You were looking really pale there for a second!”

Italy said his tone full of genuine worry. Arthur couldn’t help but flinch at the tone, guilt eating away at him for causing unnecessary worry. Swallowing the nerves that threatened to devour him Arthur gave Italy a shaky smile.

“S-sorry Italy, I just got dizzy there for a moment. I’ll be alright though.”

The Englishman said his voice cracking slightly at the end. Italy gave a distressed noise and began to led Arthur to find someplace to sit.

“Let’s get you out of the sun for a bit! I should have been paying more attention, I know that you get dizzy if you’re in the heat for too long! Mi dispiace tanto!”

The Italian said his voice rushed in his panicked rambling. Arthur just let Italy drag him into the shade, his heart pounding loudly in his ears. He felt Italy’s hand slip into his, his much larger and warmer hand covering his smaller one. It made Arthur’s heart twist at the feeling.

'I love you……’

The thought rang out again accompanied by the sense of dread. Arthur was officially in too deep and it was too late for him to climb back out from this. After that revelation the rest of the trip was awkward for the British nation. He began to notice every little detail of Italy including their interactions with one another. And with each interaction Arthur could feel his heart sink deeper into his chest. All of Italy’s gestures were friendly, never daring to cross into a less than friendly area. The Italian nation had no idea about Arthur’s feelings, nor did he give any indication that they were returned. The facts that were glaring at him made Arthur feel nauseous as he realized that he not only fell in love with Italy, a nation that was way out of his league, but he’d fallen in love with someone who didn’t even think of him in that light. That knowledge ate at him, consuming his thoughts and tearing him up inside. By the time he had went home Arthur had collapsed on his floor, his emotional turmoil overwhelming him.

It was the aftermath he was so deathly afraid of. The answer to the question that his heart wanted to know. Italy didn’t love him, not in the way that Arthur loved him. It was this damning thought that finally made him break. Fresh bitter tears began to fall from their emerald prison, staining pale cheeks. His throat grew tight as he curled in on himself, wrapping his arms around himself in the vain attempt to keep himself together. His heart hurt, feeling as if it was tearing itself from his chest. His already fragile heart was cracking, shattering and chipping away as the reality of his one sided feelings hit him full force. Arthur let out a broken and pained sob, his body shaking as he broke apart. He remained like that for a long time, staining his face and sleeves with his tears and trying desperately to keep his broken heart from completely shattering. The horrible part was the guilt that he felt, he had done something that he shouldn’t have done. He’d gone and caught feelings for his best friend and in the process of doing so made it more complicated than it needed to be. He couldn’t help but think of what Italy would think should he ever find out about Arthur’s feelings and received nasty scenarios in his head. Each one ending the same way.

Italy becoming disgusted with him and never speaking to him again.

The thought made Arthur feel hallow, breaking him even further than he already was. The Englishman couldn’t imagine his life without Italy in it. The younger nation had brought so much color into his monochrome life, bringing smiles and laughter into his dark and cold days. Italy gave Arthur’s life a new fixture, one that he needed and loved. He gave Arthur a reason to enjoy the little things in life, making him hold onto every little moment that made life so wonderful. And he had ruined it by letting his heart lead instead of his head.

'I always ruin everything……why do I always ruin everything I touch…..?’

He asked himself his thoughts broken and tired. Arthur didn’t have an answer to them.

~~~~~

Six months.

It’d been six months since Arthur had discovered his feelings. Six months since he had spent any time with Italy alone. After his emotional breakdown in his home Arthur had began to grow distant. Whenever Italy asked him to come spend time with him the English nation would make excuses. Avoiding anything that would make the two of them be alone with one another. With each excuse Italy seemed to grow more and more saddened, his once happy aura seemingly dimming. It nearly broke the older nation several times, nearly made him pull the Italian into his arms and apologize for being gone for so long. But he forced himself to remain strong knowing that if he gave in he’d just fall more in love with him. And that was the last thing he needed to do. He couldn’t get any deeper in these emotions, his heart couldn’t take it. So he avoided him to spare both of them from the painful fall that was bound to happen.

Arthur should have known though that his plans never really worked out.

Especially when it came to Italy.

It was late in the night when he heard the knocking at his door. Arthur who was laying down sat up in a sleepy daze, confused as to who could be knocking on his door this late. Making his way towards his front door Arthur unlocked it and cracked it open to see who it was. The Englishman nearly slammed it shut again but stopped when he saw the image before him. Standing at his door soaking wet was Italy. The younger nation was shivering slightly, his head hanging lowly. Arthur felt his twist and opened the door more.

“You idiot you’re going to catch your death out there! Get inside so you can get dry!”

Arthur said concerned as he ushered Italy into his home. Once the Italian was inside Arthur quickly led him into the living room and sat him down onto the sofa. Italy let him not saying a word the entire time.

“Alright just stay here I’ll go get you something to dry off with.”

Arthur said softly going to get up to do just that. However he was stopped by a drenched hand shooting out and grabbing him. Arthur turned his attention towards Italy seeing the nation cling to his arm.

“Please……England please don’t go…….I don’t want you to go……”

Italy said his voice soft and cracking. Begging him to stay. Arthur felt his heart crack at the broken tone as Italy clung to him.

“B-but you’re going to get sick-”

Arthur began to say before he was cut off by Italy.

“I don’t care! I’d rather get sick than be left alone! Please England don’t go…..don’t go where I can’t follow…..”

Italy said choking on his emotions. Arthur stared in shock as Italy finally looked up at him. Bright, broken amber eyes stared up at him, full of tears, frustration and sorrow. The Italian was shaking slightly, his eyes overflowing and leaving Arthur speechless.

“I don’t know what I did but I’m sorry England…….I’m so sorry whatever I did to hurt you…..!”

Italy said sobbing as he finally broke down. Arthur felt as if someone had taken a scoop and scooped out his insides at the Italian’s pleas for forgiveness. This wasn’t what he wanted, he never wanted to hurt Italy. He just wanted to spare him from himself. But once again he had hurt someone he cared about and it broke Arthur. Without thinking about it Arthur collapsed onto his knees in front of Italy and pulled him into a tight hug. The younger nation froze before clinging to him tightly.

“No, no you have nothing to apologize for. I’m the one who should be apologizing. I didn’t mean to hurt you Italy I was just trying to……”

Arthur said his voice thick as he tried to explain. Italy pulled away from him, looking at him with an unreadable look.

“You say you don’t mean to hurt me but you do! You’ve been hurting me for the past six months England! I’ve been so lost, not knowing what was going on! And you wouldn’t say anything to me and dannazione England you can’t just…..just leave me alone like that!”

Italy said his tone raising to a shout at the end. Arthur flinched at it his guilt drowning him.

“I…..I didn’t want to burden you with my problems! Something had came up and I didn’t want you to worry so I didn’t say anything. I wanted to handle it myself I didn’t realize that you’d get hurt!”

Arthur said trying to get his say in. Italy just glared at him.

“You wouldn’t have been a burden you absolute idiota! You never are! If you have a problem then you come to me and we can figure it out together!”

Italy snapped hurt. Arthur felt his frustration build at everything.

“It’s not something that we can fix today Italy, this is something that only I can do!”

Arthur said making Italy grab him by the arm.

“Why?! Why do you have to do it by yourself?!? I thought we were a team?? Why won’t you let me in?? England-”

Italy began to question making Arthur finally become overwhelmed by everything.

“BECAUSE YOU CAN’T HELP ME WHEN MY PROBLEM IS BEING IN LOVE WITH YOU YOU TWIT!”

Arthur snapped his voice a shout. Italy’s jaw dropped at the sentence and Arthur felt his heart drop.

“W-what….?”

Italy asked his voice soft and somewhat hesitant. Arthur felt his throat close as he realized that he had screwed up.

“I……I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you for months, hell maybe even years. I……I didn’t want to drag you down with my feelings. I didn’t…..I didn’t mean to fall in love with you…….and I just wanted to make it easier for both of us but instead I fucked it all up……I’m so sorry…..”

Arthur said tears filling his eyes as he looked down desperately trying to wipe away at them. Italy was silent, his gaze burning into him. The Brit braced himself for the heartbreak, braced himself for the words and goodbye that would ruin him. Instead what he got was a sniffle and then a body embracing his. Arthur stared shocked as Italy held him and burst into tears.

“You stupid Englishman…..! Why didn’t you tell me……all this time I’d……I’d thought that you hated me and that……that my feelings weren’t returned…..!”

Italy sobbed making Arthur stiffen at the confession.

“What are you saying….?”

Arthur asked not daring to hope.

“I’m saying that I love you too……I love you so much that it makes me wanna cry……I love you Arthur……”

Italy said his voice thick but a smile was on his face. Arthur felt his heart leap at the use of his human name and Italy’s love confession.

“I……you……”

The older nation fumbled earning a fond look.

“Arthur, just shut up.”

Italy said before leaning forward and kissing him. The Englishman froze his brain short circuiting before his eyes slid closed and he kissed back. The kiss was soft and sweet, the Italian pouring all of his love into it. Arthur returned it, wanting Italy to know that the feeling was mutual. The two pulled away from the other breathless. Italy touched Arthur’s forehead with his own and gave him a small smile. Arthur smiled back finally feeling okay after months of suffering and heartbreak.

“Te amo Arthur.”

Italy said his voice soft and full of affection as well as tears. Arthur gave a choked sob and smiled at him.

“I love you too Feli.”

Arthur muttered to Italy, no to Feli. Feli’s face broke out into a bright smile, his amber eyes twinkling before leaning back in to kiss him again. The two remained there, exchanging kisses and whispered words of love. Arthur knew that he and Feli would have to talk about what had happened before all of this but for now the Englishman embraced the present moment. As long as he had Feli with him then he wasn’t worried.

He and Feliciano were going to be okay.

*Angst?? Did someone ask for hurt and angst???? Cuz I’ve got chu fam! I’m an absolute sucker for stuff like this especially if I can make it hella dramatic shshshdh. I wanna thank my song playlist Message in a Bottle by Taylor Swift for giving me the feels for this lmfao. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it! And here’s the prompt for day three @engitaweek2022!*

EngIta Week 2022

Day 2: Fashion

Warning: Arthur and Lovino’s mouth, my boys likes to swear. As well as possibly incorrect fashion designer things.

~~~~~

Being a fashion designer was no cake walk Arthur had come to learn. Ridiculous hours and having bosses who would completely toss your projects if they deemed them not up to stuff. Running yourself into the ground and if you weren’t lucky, you sometimes got stuck with a stingy boss who would make up every excuse in the book to not pay you what you deserved. Yes being a fashion designer, especially a struggling one was no easy feat. It was a vicious cycle that Arthur had found himself in. For the past few years he’d been struggling, desperately trying to make a name for himself despite everything in the world seemly trying to make it impossible. The grumpy man had been stuck in this situation for quite sometime and it was slowly wearing him down. From putting his blood, sweat and tears into his works only to have his insane boss completely scrap the projects. However Arthur still held on despite being at his limit, desperately holding onto the hope that his efforts would finally bare fruit at some point.

And today it seemed as if his prayers were heard.

The company that Arthur was working for was finally getting some attention. But not just any kind of attention oh no. They were getting attention from agencies that specialized in models who displayed newest fashion trends and clothing. Vargas Modeling/Fashion agency was one of these parties that were interested. They were known for making the newest trends and making small time fashion designers become big. And Arthur Kirkland was determined to try and make a good impression on these people. The Englishman looked through his sketchbook of designs making sure he had everything that he needed as he sat at his work station. Bright and elegant drawings greeted him, full of future designs and clothes that he had been working on over the years. Having counted the papers and seeing that they were all there he let out a small sigh of relief. With gentle hands he placed the book down on his desk before going to grab his scissors and beginning his design for the day.

The sounds of the fabric being cut and placed on his mannequin were soothing to him. A pin cushion was strapped to his wrist and a needle was placed in his mouth as he worked, getting lost in it. Even when his job was utterly ridiculous he wouldn’t trade the making of his designs for anything. Seeing his once mere ideas coming to life made him feel a sense of happiness. Knowing that he could create something out of pieces of cloth and thread was addictive in a way. Arthur was so focused on his task that he nearly stabbed himself in the hand with his needle when the office door burst open. Standing at the door was his boss, a short older man who was extremely unpleasant. Mr. Henderson was his name and he was one of most cheapest, stingiest people Arthur had ever had the displeasure of working for. The man seemed to glare at the room around him, taking in all of his underpaid workers with a sneer. With the sounds of his expensive shoes clicking on the hard floors Mr. Henderson stared at each worker’s designs with a critical eye.

“You call this a dress? Pathetic I’ve seen dish rags with a better presentation.”

Mr. Henderson said to one person, a Hungarian woman named Elizaveta. The young woman seemed to glare at the old man, her bright green eyes full of barely hidden restraint.

“Of course Mr. Henderson, I’ll do better next time.”

Elizaveta said her tone sickeningly sweet. Mr. Henderson just grunted not seeming too interested nor concerned about whether or not he’d upset her. Once Mr. Henderson moved away from her Arthur glanced over at her with a small look. The Hungarian looked back at him seemingly understanding what he was trying to do and gave him a small nod and a tight smile. Mr. Henderson continued on his rampage, saying nasty things to each and every worker. Arthur bit back the urge to snap at his boss, no matter how much he wanted to. All to soon it was Arthur’s turn at being in Mr. Henderson’s sights. Cold eyes stared at Arthur’s piece. The Englishman had been working on a suit, the coat being a nice warm red color with a cream colored shirt underneath it. It was still within its beginning stages having been barely pieced together. Mr. Henderson gave this coat and shirt a burning look, his eyes full of disgust.

“You call this a suit Mr. Kirkland? This looks like it belongs in a circus! Honestly after being here for two years one would think that you would have learned a thing or two! Throw it away and try again!”

Mr. Henderson snarled before moving on. Arthur felt his hands shake with barely contained anger and frustration. It was like this every time Arthur’s turn came up. It was almost as if the old man was personally out to get him. Mr. Henderson returned back to the entranceway of the work room, a disappointed look on his face.

“I honestly can’t believe none of you have managed to come up with something better than these pathetic excuses you dare to call clothing! The Vargas Modeling/Fashion Agency will be here anytime this week and this is all you have to offer them??? Inexcusable and unacceptable! If I don’t see any improvements by the time the agency gets here I will personally fire each and every one of you in this room.”

Mr. Henderson thundered before disappearing from the room. The workers stared at the door in disbelief before harsh, panicked whispers broke out.

“He doesn’t mean that does he? Surely he’s joking!”

A Spaniard named Antonio said unable to believe what he’d just heard.

“Mr. Henderson can’t do this isn’t it illegal???”

Another worker a Taiwanese woman named Mei said looking downright furious at the audacity their boss had. Other voices continued to talk amongst themselves, some of them disbelieving and others ready to just call it quits. Arthur just stared at the door, his whole body frozen as he tried to get himself back to together. The Englishman and his fellow workers were snapped out of it by Elizaveta who quickly brought order to the impending chaos.

“Enough! We will worry about this when we cross that bridge! Right now we have to do our best and show that old jerk that we are more than capable of making wonderful things! Now let’s get back to work!”

She said scanning the room with a stern look. Shortly after the people began to go back to their designs, though their hearts weren’t as into it as before. Mr. Henderson’s words and threats had made them none too enthusiastic to continue. Yet in this world were jobs were necessary they really didn’t have much of a choice but to suck it up until a better opportunity presented itself. Arthur stared at the coat he was working on, it’s warm red color now looking somewhat small and not as good as he’d first thought. The British gentleman gripped his fabrics tightly, wanting nothing more than to scream when a familiar hand grabbed his arm gently.

“If it’s any consolation, I think your suit coat and shirt are absolutely wonderful Arthur.”

Elizaveta said her tone sincere. Arthur gave the Hungarian a small look before sighing softly.

“Thank you Elizaveta. I think your dress is rather lovely as well. That old git doesn’t understand talent when he sees it.”

Arthur said making Elizaveta smile.

“If that’s the case then it applies to your work as well.”

She said sweetly. Arthur just turned away not really in the mood to argue on it. Elizaveta gave Arthur a gentle squeeze before going back to her work station and continuing on her dress. The Brit took a deep breath and began his own work, wanting nothing more than to take his coat and shirt and go home.

‘Just a little bit longer Arthur old boy, soon you’ll get out of here.’

~~~~~

Arthur ran through the busy sidewalk, trying desperately to get to his destination. Pushing past the people without straight up shoving them over. It’d been a few days since the unpleasant meeting with Mr. Henderson and the Englishman had been working non stop on his new project as well as the project that he’d been told to get rid of. Days of nothing but working overtime and desperately trying to get it done and ready to present it to the agency. Days of sleeping barely at all and working himself to the bone. All in the hopes that he would be able to wow the agency and finally get away from the place he was stuck in.

Only to completely mess it up by sleeping in due to his alarm not going off.

“Fucking hell of all the bloody days for me to cock up!”

Arthur hissed under his breath furious with himself. This was possibly his one chance and he was going to screw it all up. The Brit was so busy scolding and berating himself for his carelessness that he didn’t notice the man stepping out into his path. Arthur collided with another person, their bodies tumbling onto the cold sidewalk due to the momentum of Arthur’s running. The papers that were safely in his sketchbook went flying, scattering around them. The Brit sat up with a pained groan, trying to ignore the pain of his body.

“Ah-! I’m so sorry sir! I wasn’t watching were I was going! Here let me help you-”

A voice thick with an Italian accent said. Arthur blinked and turned his attention towards the voice to see that it was the other man who he’d ran into. Bright auburn hair and a strange curl covered a handsome tanned face. Amber hues full of worry stared at him, seemingly unconcerned about his own tumble onto the pavement. He looked a few years younger than Arthur, and he was the most attractive man he’d ever seen.

'Bloody hell he’s like a model…..’

Arthur thought stupidly. The Italian man waved a hand in front of his face, making Arthur snap out of his stupor.

“Oh Dio are you alright? You don’t have a concussion do you?? You did hit the sidewalk pretty hard..”

The man said his tone filling with more concern. Arthur felt his cheeks burn in embarrassment and quickly retorted.

“No-! No I’m fine I’m the one who should be apologizing, I was the one running!”

Arthur said mortified by his behavior. He felt like an awkward teenager instead of a grown man who was twenty three. The man gave him another look obviously not believing him. Arthur didn’t pay him any mind though, scrambling at picking up his sketches and designs. He refused to make eye contact with the handsome stranger. Just as he went to reach out and pick up another sketch a tanned hand beat him to it. Arthur’s eyes snapped to the other man who was now offering a smile as he handed it to him.

“Here let me help you, it’s the least I can do for not paying attention.”

He said with a closed eyed smile. Arthur felt his already red cheeks burn more, his brain short circuiting at the smile.

“Lord have mercy he’s even more attractive when he smiles.”

Arthur thought only to hear a chiming laugh near him. The man was now looking at him amused.

“Ve, so I’m more attractive when I smile si? Well grazie bella.”

The man said giving him a small smirk. Arthur felt his embarrassment go up when he realized that he’d actually said it out loud.

“Oh my God I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize that I’d said it out loud! For fuck sake what’s wrong with me???”

Arthur said nervous and mortified by his actions. The Italian just watched him, slightly taken with this scrambled man in front of him.

“It’s alright bella, I don’t mind if it’s from you. In fact I find it rather flattering that you think so highly of my smile. Would you perhaps like to join me for a morning coff-”

The man began to ask only to be cut off by a loud swear from Arthur. The Brit had remembered that he was running late and was already getting back onto his feet, clutching his messy sketchbook to his chest.

“Fucking hell-! I’m late I’ve got to go! I’m sorry mate!”

Arthur said already running again to try and get to work. The Italian let out a startled noise and shouted out to him as he himself got to his feet. But Arthur was too far away at this point to hear him, instead running full speed down the sidewalk and disappearing into the crowd. Leaving the handsome man behind on the pavement.

~~~~~

Mr. Henderson was not happy.

In fact he was furious.

The short and stout man was bright red in the face, invisible steam coming off of him as Arthur burst through the doors. He’d been extremely late unfortunately and his boss was laying into him in front of all his coworkers.

“TARDINESS IS UNACCEPTABLE! ESPECIALLY WHEN WE HAVE SUCH IMPORTANT CLIENTS COMING IN! I SWEAR TO GOD YOU ARE THE MOST USELESS WORKER I’VE EVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF EMPLOYING-”

Mr. Henderson roared, his face slowly turning purple from how loud he was being. Arthur just stood in front of him, gritting his teeth and biting his tongue. The last thing the Brit needed was to lose his own short temper and lose any chance of getting his work noticed. Arthur noticed the pitying and sympathetic looks he was receiving from behind the boss’s back as he got chewed out.

“IF I DIDN’T NEED ALL HANDS ON DECK I WOULD FIRE YOU THIS VERY MINUTE-!!”

Mr. Henderson shouted only to be interrupted by the shrill ringing of his cellphone. The man yanked it from his back pocket and nearly broke the poor thing with how harshly he opened it.

“WHAT?!?………Oh I see……..very well I’ll be down.”

Mr. Henderson said before slamming the cell closed.

“The Vargas Modeling/Fashion Agency is here. Get your ass to your work station and don’t you dare embarrass me Mr. Kirkland. The rest of you get back to work!”

Mr. Henderson barked before storming out of the room to go and greet the Agency in the main entrance and check in desk. Arthur scurried to his work place trying to calm down the raging storm of emotion he was feeling. His hands shook and his stomach rolled with anxiety as he tried to get everything in order. He was just getting his sketchbook in order when he froze dead in place. Arthur’s heart dropped as he realized that one of his designs was missing. He swore drawing the attention of Elizaveta and Antonio who were closer to him.

“Que? Is something wrong Arthuro?”

Antonio asked his light green eyes curious.

“Arthur is everything okay?”

Elizaveta asked concerned by Arthur’s outburst. The Englishman looked up at the two, his dark green eyes filled with distress.

“My sketch! It’s missing!”

Arthur said nearly panicked as he began to search his desk for the missing paper.

“Your sketch? How did you lose it you rarely let that book out of your sight!”

Antonio said dumbfounded by the information. Arthur losing something was almost unheard of around the studio.

“Are you sure it’s missing? Where was the last place you’d seen it?”

Elizaveta asked trying to help her coworker out.

“I had it in my sketchbook! It was there this morning right before I-!”

Arthur began to explain before stopping dead in his sentence as he remembered the incident from earlier. The Englishman let out a loud groan and slammed his head against his desk startling his two coworkers.

“Arthur???”

Elizaveta asked sounding startled while Antonio just stared at him. Arthur let out a series of mumbles making the Hungarian and Spaniard exchange looks.

“Amigo we can’t help you if we can’t hear you.”

Antonio said trying to get Arthur to speak up. The Brit lifted his head from his desk and spoke again.

“This morning I was running late and as I was trying to get to work I’d ran into someone. I must have lost it during the collision….”

Arthur groaned upset with himself for not getting his sketch. Today was just not his day.

“You ran into someone? Did you catch a name? Maybe you can get it after work today?”

Elizaveta asked making Arthur shake his head.

“No I didn’t get his name. All I got out of him was his stupid face and his stupid attractive smile-”

Arthur began to grumble before Elizaveta stopped him.

“Attractive? Oh my so you ran into someone.”

The woman said her tone sly. Antonio let out a small snicker and Arthur’s head snapped up.

“No-! I mean yes-! I mean maybe-?!?! Bloody hell I don’t know that’s not what’s important right now!”

Arthur sputtered his pale freckled cheeks slowly going red. Antonio let out a whistle while Elizaveta gave him a cheeky smile.

“Oh sure Arthur~”

Elizaveta said teasingly before growing somewhat serious. Placing a gentle hand on Arthur’s back she gave a small comforting pat.

“I’m sure that you’ll find your sketch Arthur. If nothing else I know that you’ll make an even better one.”

The Hungarian said earning a hum of agreement from the Spaniard. Arthur gave the two of them small thankful looks before dropping the conversation. As the trio went back to their tasks Arthur began to think of the man he ran into that morning. He thought of his warm amber hues and his dazzling smile and his smooth voice. The Italian was an absolute catch and Arthur still couldn’t believe that he’d managed to interact with someone like that.

'Knock it off Kirkland, you can’t get distracted by a handsome stranger. You’ve got to focus.’

His conscience said stern. The Englishman shook his head, causing his messy blonde hair to sway with the movement before focusing on the outfit in front of him. It was the suit that he’d first worked on only more complete. The Brit was just adding the last few details to it before he’d consider it finished. Arthur had just got the thread through his needle and was stitching the last of the design into the sleeve when the studio doors opened making him and his coworkers pause in their work.

“And here’s where we make our designs and clothes. As you can see our fashion designers are hard at work to make only the best of the best.”

Mr. Henderson said his voice sweet and full of fake pride. The sleazy man stepped further into the room, leading a small group of people into it. Arthur’s gaze landed on them and quickly took notice of how fashionable and lovely they all were. A man with amethyst hues and dark brunette hair was in the front of the group. His face was pale and his chin had a small mole on it. A strange curl stuck out from his head and a pair of thin glasses sat on the bridge of his elegant nose. Beside him was another man with dark brown hair and tanned skin. He had hazel green eyes that were narrowed and a frown was firmly placed on his face. A strange curl also stuck out from his hair on the left side. Arthur felt his heart skip at the scary deja vu he suddenly had at the man’s appearance. He looked scarily like the man he ran into that morning only more sour looking. The man’s gaze turned towards Arthur having felt his staring. A nasty glare bore into his head making Arthur quickly look away. Finally catching sight of the third person who was with the group Arthur about dropped his needle and thread in shock.

Auburn hair with a curl on the right side of his head, tanned skin and a handsome smile. Bright amber eyes full of warmth and curiosity.

It was him.

It was the man from this morning.

Arthur felt his heart stop as he realized that the man he’d ran into, the man who he’d said had an attractive smile to his face, the man he’d left on the sidewalk in his haste to get to work was the man who was a representatives for the agency.

'Jesus Christ I fucked up so badly.’

The thought whispered in panic as Arthur tried to calm himself down. Mr. Henderson’s voice drew his attention as they made their way around. The three representatives looked at the different clothes and designs each one having different reactions to them.

“Oh look how lovely this dress is! Don’t you think so Roderich???”

A chipper Italian voice belonging to the handsome stranger said. The elegant man, Roderich looked at the dress and gave it a critical look.

“It’s impressive. You’re incredibly talented.”

Roderich said his voice thick with an Austrian accent. The answering thank you was sweet and somewhat shy as Elizaveta took in the praise. It continued on like this with each of them praising different works and such. The angry looking Italian, who Arthur heard be called Lovino had taken a liking to Antonio’s designs if the gruff it’s alright said anything about it. Mr. Henderson let them look, obviously not agreeing with what they were saying.

“They have done a splendid job but they’re still learning how to do the business. But a little practice will do them wonders.”

Mr. Henderson said offering a fake smile. It made Arthur want to hurl his pin cushion at him.

“Ve, I really like this one. It’s rather beautiful.”

A voice said close to Arthur making the Englishman jump slightly. Turning to his side he met the amused gaze of the man who he ran into. The Italian was looking at him and his suit, a gentle hand holding one of the sleeves.

“I shouldn’t be surprised though given that your sketch was just as wonderful.”

The man praised making Arthur’s face break out into a blush at the praise.

“I….uh thank you…Mr…..?”

Arthur said fumbling slightly with his thread. The man gave him a small smile and held out his hand.

“Vargas. Feliciano Vargas. Co-owner of the agency.”

The man Feliciano said. Arthur slowly shook his hand, his throat dry.

“Pleasure to meet you Mr. Vargas.”

He said politely trying to ease his racing heart. Feliciano gripped his hand and shook it. Mr. Henderson cleared his throat drawing Feliciano and Arthur’s attention.

“Yes Mr. Kirkland here is one of our beginners here, a novice if you will.”

Mr. Henderson said his tone professional and stiff. Arthur bristled at the man’s tone hating him even more. Even when Arthur was praised the nasty man had to find some way to make it crummy. Feliciano gave Mr. Henderson a searching look not taking too kindly to it either. However he didn’t say anything, in fact it was completely taken care of by his brother who from the moment they’d stepped in the place had been slowly getting more and more irritated.

“For fucks sake you’re a cynical old bastard aren’t you? You say these people are beginners but it’s obvious that they’re not. No beginners can make the things they can make.”

Lovino snapped obviously fed up with the fakeness of it. Mr. Henderson blinked in shock his eyebrow twitching slightly.

“Oh? I didn’t realize, my apologies Mr. Vargas-”

Mr. Henderson began before he was cut off.

“Honestly this is absolute bullshit. From the moment we’ve stepped into this dump it’s been quite clear that your workers aren’t happy and that pisses me off.”

Lovino said his tone angry. Arthur could only watch as the other Vargas brother tore a new one into his boss not seeming to care. Mr. Henderson’s fake niceness was slowly beginning to crack, his own voice becoming snippy and irritated. The workers watched in awe as their boss was put in his place, enjoying the view. Finally it all came to a head as Mr. Henderson exploded. After that the fight was taken out of the workplace, Lovino and Mr. Henderson’s voices raising down the hallway. Once they were gone Roderich addressed the room.

“Since my boss is currently busy at the moment I shall let you all know that you are all incredibly talented. The Vargas Modeling/Fashion agency would be more than happy to have you all in our employment program should you choose.”

The Austrian said making the room explode in happy and excited voices. Arthur felt his jaw drop slightly at the new job offer before a throat clearing drew his attention back to Feliciano. The Italian smiled at him and held something out to him.

“You forgot this when you ran away this morning Mr. Kirkland.”

Feliciano said chipper as Arthur took the paper from his grasp. It was the missing sketch that he’d been looking for.

“Ah please, call me Arthur. And I apologize for running away so quickly, I was in quite the rush. Anyways thank you for returning my sketch.”

Arthur said blushing lightly. Feliciano grinned at the sight.

“Arthur, it suit you bella. Since I returned your sketch I’d like to ask you something.”

Feliciano said his eyes full of amusement and slight nervousness. Arthur felt his heart skip a beat as he was pinned by those eyes.

“Would you perhaps like to join me for a morning coffee sometime? I’d love to get to know a lovely man such as yourself.”

Feliciano said shimmying a bit as he waited for Arthur’s answer. The Englishman stared at him in shock before shyly smiling at him.

“I’d love to.”

Arthur said making Feli beam with happiness. It was that day that Arthur finally got out of the place he was in. From then on the Englishman made a name for himself and his fashions, and fell in love with Feliciano along the way, and years down the road as he sat by his beloved husband’s side in front of their garden Arthur couldn’t help but feel like all of the things he’d went through was worth it.

*Oh Dolly Parton how you make a gal wanna quit her job of working 9 to 5 shsgsgsg. Here’s the second prompt for EngIta week! I wasn’t expecting to write this much and the story is kinda wonky in certain scenes but I tried my best to make it make sense sgsvdvdbdn. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!! And @engitaweek2022*

EngIta Week 2022

Day 1: Fears

Warning: Major character death and blood. But it’s not forever I promise.

~~~~~

Warmth.

There’s so much warmth. It reminded him of a peaceful spring day, his favorite kind of days. A vast green meadow surrounded him, a gentle spring breeze blowing through his auburn hair. Behind him a familiar house sat in the distance. It was a house that he hadn’t seen in centuries.

‘I know this place…..’

Feliciano turned around in his spot searching for the familiar person that he was desperate to see. Gazing around he caught sight of another figure in the distance. A familiar shorter frame, bright, messy blonde hair and warm green eyes stared back at him. A small shy smile on a lightly freckled face. Feliciano felt his heart pick up as a smile came across his face.

“Arthur…!”

The Italian called out to the other nation, waving enthusiastically at him. Arthur stared at him, still wearing that same shy smile yet he did not wave back nor did he come any closer. Feli not liking this began to head towards him, to feel him in his arms again. Only…..every time Feli drew closer to him, Arthur seemed to pull away. The Italian nation felt a small sense of unease set in as he felt himself break into a jog to try and catch up to Arthur.

“Arthuro! Wait for me-!”

Feli called out his voice being drowned out by the wind. Further and further he ran after Arthur, never able to touch him. The British nation was always so close yet always out of reach. The younger nation felt his heart race as the sense of unease grew larger. A deep rooted need to get to Arthur began to consume him. Arthur continued to move ahead of him, not seemly bothered by the distance between them.

“Please Arthur-! Wait for me amore! Don’t leave me behind-!”

Feliciano said before he tripped over his own two feet, his body hitting the ground harshly. The Italian hissed in pain before snapping his head up to try and catch a glimpse of Arthur. Feli felt his stomach drop as the sight of the sudden empty meadow greeted him. Arthur was gone, seemly having disappeared into thin air. Blood began to pound in his ears as he forced himself to his feet, his amber gaze searching frantically. Yet no sign of the familiar Englishman was seen.

“Arthur?!? Arthur where are you?!? Please answer me!! Don’t leave me all alone!!”

Feliciano shouted out as he began to run into a full on sprint. He needed to find Arthur before it was too late. The meadow around him began to grow dark the longer he ran. Its once vibrant grass and flowers becoming dead and brittle. The warmth he’d once felt began to become cold and biting. Yet he persisted onwards refusing to leave Arthur alone. The Italian finally found the Englishman however……

“ARTHUR!!”

He screamed his eyes burning at the sudden tears that threatened to fall. There laying amongst a battlefield of bodies was his beloved Arthur. The Englishman’s body was curled up in an awkward position, his once bright lively eyes, now a dull grey color. Blood stained his clothes and weapons and hair, making the sight of him even more horrific. Feliciano’s body moved on its own, not caring if he had to step over the soliders who’d fallen. All he cared about was getting to Arthur. He needed Arthur to be okay.

'Please….! Whoever is out there listening please….! Not him…..anyone but him…..!’

The Italian nation pleaded to any deity that was listening. After an eternity of stumbling over the dirt, soliders and discarded weapons he finally got to Arthur. The English nation didn’t move as his lover came up beside him. Feliciano felt his throat tighten and his heart shatter as his worst fears were confirmed.

Arthur, his sweet and fierce Arthur was gone.

Feli’s legs gave out from under him, causing him to collapse beside Arthur. Fresh stinging tears burned at his eyes and overflowed onto his cheeks. With trembling hands the younger nation reached out to cup one of Arthur’s cheeks. Cold met his warmth and brought forth more bitter and broken tears. Feliciano gently gathered his lover into his arms, laying his head into his shoulder. Cradling him close Feli let out a broken wail as the reality hit him. Burying his face into Arthur’s hair Feliciano wept and sobbed. His heart shattering even more as he clung to the once strong and warm nation.

“Arthur…..Arthur mi amore please come back don’t leave me alone……I can’t do this without you……”

Feli begged receiving no reply. Instead all he received was the cruel silence of the dead. With stuttering breaths Feliciano kissed Arthur’s head, praying for a miracle that wouldn’t appear. Arthur was gone, no longer would he have his sweet shy smiles directed at him. No longer would he have his stern yet gentle scoldings whenever he’d done something silly or foolish, no longer would he hear his laughter or see his adorable pouts.

No longer would he hear those three words whispered to him in their most intimate moments.

Choking on his tears Feli rocked the two of them back and forth, drowning in his own grief. Once again he’d failed to protect the one he loved, once again he was left completely and utterly alone in this world. Forced to continue living while his heart was no longer with it.

'First Holy Rome……and now you……forgive me Arthur please forgive me for not being able to keep you safe. Amore mio, mia cara, ti amo per favore non lasciarmi solo…..’

Feliciano was alone and broken and there was nothing he could do.

~~~~~

A sharp gasp and Feliciano flung up in his bed. His eyes wide and filled with tears and fear. Shaking slightly he ran a hand through his hair, biting his fist as he bit back his sobs. A small whimper came from him, causing the other body in the bed to groan sleepy. Feli’s eyes snapped towards the other side of his bed as his beloved Arthur awoken. Sleepy green eyes blinked at him as he rubbed at one of them.

“Feli…..? What’s going on you alright luv…..?”

Arthur asked his voice soft and full of sleep. Feliciano began to shake some more as he took in the sight of Arthur alive and well next to him. The Brit was completely fine, his skin and clothes clean of any blood. Arthur was okay, his love was still there with him. Feli let out a choked sob making Arthur become more awake instantly at the sound.

“Feli, love what’s wrong? Poppet you’re crying….”

Arthur said his voice soft and full of concern. The Englishman barely had a chance to prepare himself before he was tackled by a sobbing Italian. Stiffening for only a moment Arthur quickly relaxed and hugged his boyfriend tightly. He had no idea what was going on but he knew that Feli was shaken up and he was determined to make it better.

“It’s alright my darling. It’s going to be alright, I’m here. I’ve got you love.”

Arthur spoke soothingly, rubbing gentle circles on Feliciano’s back. The younger nation just clung to him, his ear pressed up against the older nation’s chest. The steady, gentle sound of Arthur’s heartbeat filled Feliciano’s ears. Showing him proof that his treasure was alive and with him. That his precious Arthur wasn’t on a battlefield somewhere dying or dead. That Feli wasn’t alone again. The Italian clung to him tightly not wanting to let him go. The two stayed like this for a beat before the silence was broken by Feli.

“I love you Arthuro, mi tesoro. If anything happened to you……it’d break my heart…..please…..please don’t leave me Arthur…..”

Feliciano begged his voice thick and full of a fragility. Arthur gave his lover a stunned look before his gaze softened in understanding. Leaning down he placed a loving kiss on Feliciano’s head.

“I could never leave you darling…..you’re my heart and soul. To leave you would be a pain that I could not bare…..I love you too much to leave you alone.”

Arthur said squeezing the Italian gently. Feli gave a whimpering sniffle, more eased now that he heard that his feelings were mutual. Arthur gently manoeuvred them back into the bed to lay down. Keeping Feliciano’s head over his chest above his heart, the older nation began to run his fingers through the other man’s hair. Arthur began to hum a soft lullaby as he did the soothing action making Feli relax at the combination. Closing his eyes he listened to the sound of Arthur’s gentle heartbeat and his soft and sweet humming. A feeling of ease and love filled him as he slowly began to fall back asleep. Arthur wouldn’t leave him and he wouldn’t leave Arthur and at that moment it was enough.

*This is my first time writing for a prompt week so I’m pretty excited!! Our first prompt was Fears and I’d decided to go with Feli given that he’s a usually chipper guy. I think that his biggest fear would be being left alone. After losing someone like Holy Rome it’d make sense that he’d have a fear of losing his loved ones and being left behind. So I wrote this small piece with that idea in mind. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!! And here’s my first submission @engitaweek2022!*

misteria247:

Hetalia Masterlist Part Two

The Writing Bin

Asakik Ghost Hunter/Kitsune AU Part One (Romantic) ⬆️

Here’s part two of my Hetalia Masterlist!!!!!

Beautiful Letters

Beauty.

What exactly was beauty?

To some beauty was in the form of nature, to others it was in the form of looks, and to a few it was in the form of trinkets that shined or shimmered in the light. There were many interruptions of the word, many forms of it, but for you beauty was in the form of the one who you loved most in the world.

Beauty was in the form of Vil Schoenheit.

But not in the way that many people would believe. Granted Vil was a beautiful man, with sharp, elegant amethyst hues and porcelain pale skin that glowed in the sun. With pale blonde hair tipped with lavender and sharp facial features and an air of dignity and regale and elegance he was in a way the definition of beauty. However none of those things were what you associated with beauty. No for you Vil’s beauty came from his inner self, it came from his kindness and dedication and his hard work. It came from his compassion and his willingness to help those who needed it and never asking for anything in return.

Vil Schoenheit’s beauty was in the form of the very person that he was in your eyes.

Perhaps that was why you’d fallen so hard for him. Why you’d found yourself dreaming about him, wanting him to glance in your direction. You hadn’t realized until very recently just how in love with him you were, when you’d truly caught a glimpse of the man underneath the natural beauty. It’d been a normal day for you, the same mundane routine going to school and existing quietly amongst your classmates. Invisible in a way to those around you, when you’d stumbled upon a scene that you probably shouldn’t have seen. Vil Schoenheit, the Pomefiore dormitory leader was sitting alone by the wishing well, gently holding a small bird on his finger.

“Are you hungry little one? You’re in luck because I have some food leftover from lunch.”

The man said softly, his voice gentle and kind as he interacted with the small creature. The bird chirped happily when it was given a few crumbs to munch on, hopping from Vil’s finger and into the palm of his hand, while Vil watched over it quietly like a silent but tender guardian. It was surreal in a way to see Vil holding something so small and look so at ease within that moment. Whenever you’d seen the dorm leader he was usually somewhat serious and unapproachable in a way but now in the private moment that you’d stumbled on, the once unattainable and distant man you’d once known was now a kind and gentle one who seemed to enjoy feeding a small little bird.

You watched the small moment your heart doing a funny little pattern in your chest as you took it in. The smile on his face, sincere and untroubled, the gentle warmth in his eyes and in that moment you realized just how deeply in love with him you were. After that you began to see so many glimpses of the beautiful man, in moments when he’d interact with his underclassmen Epel and his vice dorm leader Rook to tending to his flowers near the Pomefiore dormitory. With each moment you fell deeper and deeper in love with him. With each moment the urge to tell him grew stronger, to let him know what you saw in him. However you were much too shy to go up to him and blatantly confess.

So you became content to watch him from afar, admiring him and quietly pining over him. And for awhile it worked for you, until your friend Yuu found out. Once they found out about it suddenly the once content existence you lived was completely wrecked. Yuu bless them tried to slowly get you and Vil to interact with one another more, however you would quickly make an escape when your shyness and flustered state became overwhelming. Often times leading to some embarrassing moments.

“(Y/N) you’ve gotta do something at least! This whole pining thing isn’t exactly healthy.”

The prefect said as they scolded you over another failed attempt at actually talking to Vil. You bowed your head slightly like a kicked puppy.

“I’m sorry Yuu it’s just so difficult to talk to him…..”

You said softly your (H/L) (H/C) hair covering your face slightly. Yuu gave you a small pitying look, knowing that this was rather difficult for you. You weren’t the most sociable person, easily getting flustered and shy and awkward whenever too much attention was on you. The Ramshackle dorm leader quietly pondered in their thoughts while you chewed on your lower lip nervously at their silence. You about jumped out of your skin when Yuu suddenly snapped their fingers together in an epiphany.

“I got it, how about instead of directly talking to him you write him a letter?”

Yuu asked training their gaze on you. You stared at your friend in slight confusion.

“A letter….?”

You asked earning a nod from the prefect.

“Yeah a letter. You can send something to him anonymously and tell him your feelings until you can gather the courage to actually talk to him.”

Yuu said satisfied with their solution. You pondered this going over the pros and cons of this. If you wrote a letter you could finally tell him your truest feelings, without the shyness you display whenever you were around him. You could finally let him know what was slowly eating away at you without him ever knowing it was you. However if you went through with this and Vil found out that you were the sender……….

You felt an small sense of dread hit you at the possible outcomes. Each one more horrid than the last one. You were getting so stuck in the imaginary scenarios that Yuu had to snap you out of it.

“Just think about it okay? If you don’t want to then we’ll try another way to get you guys to interact more.”

Yuu said softly rubbing your shoulder soothingly. You gave a shaky nod and the two of you went quiet only speaking about mundane things. Yet your mind was a million miles away.

~~~~~

Writing letters was a lot harder than you thought it was. You didn’t even know where to begin. Staring at the sheet of paper in front of you, you thought about how to possibly start. The gentle light shining from your desk lamp illuminated your bedroom in a gentle glow as you pondered. As you did this your thoughts drifted back towards Vil himself and with him came a few memories. Your mind replayed one these memories, of one of the few times you’d managed to actually speak to him somewhat. You’d been sitting in the courtyard by yourself near the flowers, the scent of lilacs and lilies surrounding you as you enjoyed the blossoms. Vil had came to join you wondering if you were alright. After telling him that you were fine the two of you had managed to start a conversation.

It was somewhat awkward for you but you managed to speak to him despite your heart pounding and your thoughts racing. You remembered saying something and the amused chuckle that you’d received from the dorm leader along with the smile.

‘He has the most beautiful smile…..’

Your heart fluttered at the memory of it and suddenly a stroke of inspiration hit you. You knew what you were going to write. Grabbing your pen you began to write your letter. You stayed up late into the night writing what your heart was telling you, putting your most sincere and heartfelt words into it in hopes that it would reach him. Hands stained in ink and a feeling of self satisfaction you folded your letter and placed it into the envelope to keep it safe. Once done you made your way to bed and curled up into the sheets and blankets settling in for the night.

'Please…..let this not blow up in my face.’

You pleaded before drifting off to sleep.

~~~~~

Mornings in the Pomefiore dormitory was some of the best kind in Vil’s opinion. The sun peaking over the vast forest trees and painting the gray castle walls and flowers in its bright reddish pink hues was a sight that he’d never get tired of. The dorm leader was making his way around the small flowers and vines in the gardens, his dark purple and golden robes painted in the morning rays, trailing behind him like a tapestry of rich purples. The dark red strings that hung from his belt swished gently with his movements as he strolled along taking everything in. It wasn’t often that Vil got a chance to have a peaceful moment such as this. Being the dorm leader of Pomefiore as well as an actor and model rarely gave him time to just stop and relax so the change was welcomed greatly.

Vil made his way to the stone bench near the lilacs and sat down closing his eyes and listening to nature begin to wake up. The sounds of birds chirping and squirrels climbing up trees filled the air, and a gentle yet chilly early morning breeze playfully moved his hair. The lavender tipped hues gleamed against his pale locks and bangs surrounding him in a golden halo of sorts. Vil took a slow deep breath in smelling the fresh morning dew, flowers and grass. A sense of calm washed over him as he sat there listening and existing.

'Nothing can ever compare to this.’

He thought as he hummed softly with fondness.

“Ah there you are Roi du Poison, I was wandering where you went.”

Rook’s voice called out to him breaking the peaceful moment. The dorm leader sighed and opened his eyes meeting the hunter green hues of his friend and vice dorm leader. Rook was smiling down at him with a somewhat fond look, his hat blocking the sunlight. Vil looked up at him expression blank and already stoic.

“I’m guessing it’s almost time to wake up the rest of the dorm. Go ahead and get started, I have to grab something from my room and then I’ll join you.”

Vil said already missing the peace he had momentarily. Rook gave a bigger grin and nodded.

“Oui but of course my beautiful queen, I’ll see you inside.”

The huntsman said before heading back towards the castle’s entryway. Vil stood up shortly after brushing down his robes and following suit. Before stepping through the vast entranceway of the Pomefiore castle Vil took one last look at the morning sun remorse fully and then proceeded inside to start his day. The castle was quiet as he stepped through the doorway, the only sounds being that of his heels as he made his way towards his bedroom to grab his things to start the morning beauty routine with his underclassmen. Passing by the fabric tapestries and porcelain vases filled with flowers he finally caught sight of the familiar door that lead to his bedroom. Reaching for the doorknob Vil went to turn it but paused when the tip of his heeled boat kicked something. Confused the teen looked down towards the ground and caught sight of an envelope.

Curiosity perked up as he bent down and picked it up, gently looking it over in his hands. There was no signature other than his name on the front of it written in ink. Keeping it in one hand Vil used the other to open the bedroom and stepped inside closing the door behind him. Making his way to his vanity he sat down in the plush chair and with slow cautious movements opened the envelope and pulled out the letter and began to read its contents.

“Dearest Vil, I’ve written this letter to let you know of my deepest feelings towards you. I’m not the best with words nor expressing myself but I can not continue on in silence any longer. For the longest time I’ve watched and admired from afar, wanting nothing more than to speak with you and be in your presence. However I’ve been much too shy to do so, so I’d decided that a letter would be the best approach for what I wish to say, that being that I have developed feelings for you. Whenever I’m near you my heart flutters and I become tongue tied. There’s so many things that I wish to say, so many things that you’ve most likely heard before from many others. I wish for nothing more than to express all of these feelings and my sincerity in how I feel about you, for you to know that you’re one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen. Your strength, your kindness, generosity and determination, your hard working, never give up attitude. Your passion and your heart, these are just a few of the things that make me love you. Even if you don’t return my affections I’d be happy just knowing that I’ve finally gotten to say what I’ve been wanting to say since forever: that I am fully and completely in love with you and your beautiful soul. Love your secret admirer.”

Vil stared at the letter stunned. It wasn’t the first time he’d received a love letter and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. However this letter was different. A type of sincerity leaked out of the words as well as a type of affection. The person who wrote this not once mentioned his looks but rather him as a person. It was something that he rarely ever heard from admirers. Vil held the letter gently as if it was fragile as he tried to figure out who could have possibly written it. After coming up with nothing the prefect sighed and refolded the letter and placed it delicately back into its envelope. Standing up from his vanity Vil felt a fire begin to burn within him, fueling him with determination and a hardened resolve.

He’d find the author of this letter and hear from their own mouth everything they wished to say.

And perhaps if they were willing they could both discover something even more beautiful than words.

*Shows up several months later with a Starbucks in hand and an exhausted vibe. Sup bitches Vil Schoenheit has rotted my brain and ruined my life so I decided to write something for him lol. My love was reawakened by Vil forehead kisses and I regret absolutely nothing. Forgive me for the crummy love letter bit I’m not used to writing stuff like that lmfao. Also lowkey I like to imagine that Vil would probably enjoy nature to some extent because he enjoys beautiful things and nature can be hella beautiful bet. Sorry if he’s out of character I tried my best. The reader is ambiguous so y'all decide what gender they are lol. I don’t know if I’ll continue this. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!!!*

Forgotten

Side Story: Four Years

Warning: This fic contains themes such as depression, unhealthy coping mechanisms, mentions of death and people grieving. If this makes y'all uncomfortable I highly encourage y'all to check out my other works.

Year One

Twelve months.

Twelve months of trying to move on, of grieving and trying desperately to not completely succumb to the emotional turmoil that was always threatening to spill over. And for Michelangelo Hamato such an outcome wasn’t an option. Not when he had two older brothers who needed him to keep going, not when he had a father who was barely able to remain strong for the rest of them. He had to keep up the charade, had to act like he wasn’t completely breaking down on the inside no matter how hard it was to do. No matter how much he wanted to scream and go absolutely insane from the pressure of it all. Most days he could do it much to his own surprise, most days he could throw on those fake feelings and act as if he wasn’t as bothered as he truly was.

However today…..

Today would be a challenge.

Not that other days weren’t.

Mikey woke up in his room, the haze of sleep still clouding his mind in its gentle embrace before he slowly came back to the waking world. Baby blue hues slowly came to life as sleep left him. Pushing himself up in his bed the youngest turtle looked around his room, the familiar knickknacks and other things greeting him. It was peaceful, a tranquil moment that he rarely ever got. As he gazed at his bedroom his eyes landed on a sight that was new. Confused he paused in his examination and zoned in on it. The newest addition to his room was in the corner of it, small enough that it wouldn’t take up too much space yet big enough that it was noticable. A small shrine of sorts, complete with incense, mentos, and a picture that sat in the middle of it.

A picture of a smiling face and dark blue eyes full of wisdom and sincerity.

A picture of the oldest Hamato son, of his brother Leonardo.

And just like that the once tranquil moment that Michelangelo was having shattered like a fragile glass, as he finally connected what it was that he was looking at. Pain and grief, raw and sharp and vicious hit him like a ton of bricks waking him up completely as the harsh reality of his current life smacked him in the face. The youngest brother couldn’t stop the sudden bitter sense of sorrow and loss, the tears he’d tried so desperately to keep at bay coming up unasked. Grabbing his T-Phone he took in the date and felt a sense surrealism hit him. Today was the anniversary of his brother’s death, the date of the day when everything fell apart, of when he and his family lost one of the most important people in their lives. Mikey stared at the phone with a blank expression, the tears he’d once been trying to hold back now falling freely as it sunk in.

Twelve months. Twelve months since he’d last seen Leo’s smile, since he’d heard his voice and laughter. Twelve months since he’d touched the oldest turtle, since he’d felt safe and happy and loved.

“No…..this isn’t real there’s no way……”

The orange turtle teen spoke, his voice gruff from the leftover sleep and the overwhelming emotions he was hit with by this fact. It was something he couldn’t process, a fact that he refused to believe, a truth that he didn’t want to acknowledge. However the date staring back at him in bright digital numbers told him that it had indeed been a year since Leo was taken from them. Mikey didn’t move from his bed for a long time, silently crying and grieving over everything and desperately trying to pull himself together before he went to join the rest of the Hamato clan. After a difficult struggle and a few near sobbing breakdowns he’d finally managed to pull himself together enough to continue with the day.

With a great reluctance Mikey pulled himself out of his bed and began to grab his morning essentials so he could start the day. Grabbing his mask as well as his towel for the morning shower he paused in front of the shrine once again being greeted by the smiling face of a brother long gone. Without thinking about it Mickey placed his things down and settled himself in front of the shrine, sitting on his knees. Once he was settled he dug around in the small basket that sat beside it and pulled out the lighter that resided within it. Flicking it to life he grabbed an incense stick and lit it before using it to light the rest. Soon the room was filled with the scent of smoke and incense, making the turtle teen’s throat tighten slightly. Once he did this he bowed his head and folded his hands, praying for his older brother’s happiness in the afterlife before he focused his light blue hues on the picture.

It was an older one, a photo that Michelangelo himself had managed to take without Leonardo noticing until the deed had been done. Leo’s face was filled with a natural smile, his usual polite smile nowhere in sight. His eyes which were usually calm and somewhat serious were full of a sincere and happy look, the corners of them crinkled slightly from his smile. It was one of those captured moments that Mikey had managed to get of his older brother with his guard down. A moment that was forever within it.

A moment that he’d never experience ever again.

Mikey sucked in a sharp breath and once again felt his eyes burn from the tears that threatened to spill once more. He silently cursed himself and quickly wiped away at his eyes.

‘You shouldn’t hold in your tears Mikey. It’s not healthy to bottle things up like that.’

Leo’s voice seemed to whisper in the younger’s head, a recording of a time when he’d give Mikey and the others wisdom when they least expected it. It was that thought that sounded so much like his older brother’s concerned voice in his head that made Michelangelo finally break. The tears which he’d just managed to get under control came back tenfold and no longer silent. No now these tears were loud and fast and burning as the orange clad turtle curled in on himself. A wail, loud and full of pain and grief sounded from within his chest as the control that he’d so desperately tried to keep slipped away, leaving the rotting and raw and ruined mass that lurked beneath it. Hugging himself tightly Mikey tried to stop it but he was powerless.

“Why….?! Why did you have to go?!!? I…..I miss you so much Leo…..!!! You……you should be here-! Why aren’t you here anymore?!? Why did you have to go where we couldn’t follow!??!!!”

The turtle teen sobbed his voice cracking as the tidal wave of emotion finally drowned him. He was so lost in the whirlwind of it all that he didn’t even notice the three other people who came into the room, having heard his heart wrenching wail of grief. The poor boy about jumped out of his skin when a pair of furry arms wrapped around him. Mikey’s head snapped up, his eyes wide and full of tears as he caught sight of the familiar face that he’d known his whole life.

Master Splinter.

The older rat was looking at his youngest son with a look of grief and concern. His warm brown eyes reflecting the same emotions that Mikey was experiencing. Standing behind him was his two older brothers, Raph and Donnie. Raph’s eyes held a helpless look in them, the bright green hues dark with an anger towards himself for not noticing sooner. Donnie’s expression was one of heartbreak, his reddish brown eyes watery as they too filled with tears at the sight of his little brother’s pain.

“It’s alright my son…..I miss him as well. We all do……Michelangelo. You’re not alone in this.”

Master Splinter’s voice spoke up from beside him, pulling his youngest tightly into his chest and rubbing his shell. Mikey didn’t hesitate to latch onto his father, his pained sobs growing as he cried against the man who raised him. It wasn’t long before Mikey felt Raph and Donnie join the hug, offering him the comfort he so desperately needed at that moment.

“We’re so sorry Mikey…..we…..we should have realized sooner……”

Donnie choked out, his voice wavering as he lost his own battle with his tears. The purple clad turtle was consumed with guilt at not having noticed just how torn up the youngest truly was, instead being too preoccupied with his own grief.

“We’re gonna be okay ya hear me? We’ve got your back just like you’ve got ours. Don’t go being stupid and not saying anything!”

Raph was the last one to speak his voice rough and unintentionally harsh sounding. Yet they all knew it was because he was worried about Mikey, that he felt guilty for not being the big brother that his younger brothers needed recently. Mikey overwhelmed by the comfort and realizing that he wasn’t the only one who was trying to keep it together clung to his family more and cried. The small family of four didn’t move from one another for a long time, sharing tears and trying their best to comfort one another during this horrific day. Grieving for the one that they’d lost a year ago and trying their best to mend their emotional wounds. After some time they finally parted away from one another, red faced and covered in tears and snot. It was obvious that even though they’d gotten over their crying fits the emotional turmoil remained. It would remain for as long as they lived. Before Mikey knew it he was once again alone in his room after getting his tears out with his family. With shaking hands he went to pick up his things that he’d placed down, once again looking at the photo of Leo.

While Michelangelo appreciated his family’s support and their attempts to comfort him while they themselves suffered as well he couldn’t help but feel torn up inside. The youngest brother wanted to have Leo there, he wanted to be held and comforted by his blue clad brother one more time. No one in the world was able to ease Mikey like Leo could, no one in the world could make the pain seem not as terrible like Leo could. It was just a talent that the oldest Hamato son had, an aura of comfort and security that only he could display. Raph, Donnie and Master Splinter they were comforting in a way but they weren’t Leo. Perhaps it was because he was the baby of the family that he felt this way, after all Leo had always been the one to comfort and wipe the tears away when Master Splinter wasn’t around to do it. Leo was always the one that would cheer not only Mikey up, but Raph and Donnie as well.

But he couldn’t do it anymore.

He’d never be able to do it.

The dead couldn’t hug you nor give you comfort nor give you the things you wanted. It was a fact that Mikey hated more than he hated anything in the world.

Leo was gone and there was nothing that Mikey could do about it.

With another sniffle Mikey forced himself away from the shrine, and made his way towards the bathroom to get that shower before he’d go to join his brothers and father who were waiting for him so they all could try and get through this anniversary together.

Even though it was clear that none of them could.

*What’s this? A Tmnt fic? On this blog? More likely than you think mate. So I’ve had this thought bouncing around in my head for a long ass time and I’d decided to go ahead and write it down. As some of you older fans of my writing may know I have this series called Forgotten, to be simple about it Leo loses his memories and doesn’t remember anything. After being supposedly dead for four going on five years he reunites with his family and thus angst material. I haven’t updated it in a hot minute (mainly cuz I’ve got no inspiration currently whoops) but that’s what this side story is about somewhat. I decided to go with Mikey because I love to make sweet cinnamon rolls suffer. I do plan on writing three more parts for this each part taking place in a different year and from a different POV. I just don’t know when I’ll get to them. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!!*

La La Lost You

While I’m on Sunset, are you on the subway?~ While I drive, are you gettin’ on the L-train?~ I mean, Manhattan’s nice, but so are Malibu nights~ You would know if you stayed, you would know if you put up a fight~

The night was humid and quiet save for crickets as you found yourself walking around the dead streets. Buildings with dull or neon lights shined around you as you walked, painting your frame in an array of colors and shadows. Yet you paid no mind to any of these things as you continued onwards, your mind a million miles away from your current world. It was how you spent most of your days, just wandering through the streets of your hometown in a somewhat haze. You felt your skin become covered in a thin sheen of sweat from the humanity, making your clothes stick to you uncomfortably. As you walked you caught sight of a nearby corner store, its window lit up in a bright neon sign among many.

The bright red words saying OPEN flashed on and off, making you turn your head towards it more. As you did you caught sight of the rack inside the store and the magazines and newspapers that were displayed upon it. Gazing at the sight you felt your heart stop.

WORLD RENOWNED THIEF, LUPIN THE THIRD STRIKES AGAIN.

A newspaper said, its bold black ink lettering screaming from the front page. A grainy picture of said thief decorated the paper underneath the headliner. While not the best picture taken of him, it was clear enough that you could make out the cocky smile that always stayed on his face. You felt your throat tighten slightly as you stared at it, a wave of memories hitting you.

A cocky grin…….

A bright red jacket……

Warm, clever gray eyes……

A musical laughter……

The scent of an expensive yet pleasant smelling body wash…….

You sucked in a sharp breath as they hit you. The memories fresh and sharp and all too very real, making seem like that he was right there beside you. You didn’t hesitate to quicken your pace, suddenly feeling like you were going to drown in them. With a choked noise you forced yourself to continue on and away from the corner store with its hellish reminders of a man that no longer existed in your world. Your heart pounded in your chest, constricting slightly as those familiar emotions hit you with those memories. It was funny how a picture of someone who was once apart of your life could cause such destruction to you and make you fall apart at the seams.

‘It’s been nearly a year since I’ve seen him. I shouldn’t be so weak about these things.’

Your mind ever logical in every sense scolded you, reminding you that you should have moved on. Reminding you of the horrible reality that you were in. Yet your heart seemed to rebel against this, as it tortured you with what once was. You could still recall it, those memories from a year ago crystal clear as if they’d happened only yesterday. The memories that gave you so much happiness as well as sorrow when they made themselves known.

~~~~~

Your hometown was a small one, not well known other than for its view of the vast ocean and its beautiful sunshiny atmosphere. Your hometown would have a few tourists visit during the summer months where business would boom more. It was during this season of sunshine and relaxation that you’d met him. You’d been walking around the familiar streets that you’d known since childhood, a basket full of fresh produce and other things on your arm, off in your own world when you’d ran into him. It was hard not to notice him when he was flirting with some of the local women who swooned or flirted back. A lanky frame covered in a bright red jacket, dark brown hair and light gray eyes full of mischief. And a smile that was charming to all who were in its presence. To put bluntly he was a handsome man with a charming personality that made all the girls as well as boys pay attention.

You’d been taken out of your daydreaming by the sound of his laughter. It was loud yet not to the point where it was irritating. It was musical in a way and it made you want to listen to it all the time. You turned your gaze towards the direction of that laughter and that’s when you saw him in all of his glory. You’d caught glimpses of him from time to time but now you were close enough to get a full view of the handsome man that had captured the attention of your hometown’s ladies. It was hard to look away from him if you were honest. And then…..

He turned his gaze onto you.

As soon as you made eye contact with him your face burst into flames of embarrassment at being caught. Without thinking you quickly turned your head and to put simply absconded away from him and the group of female admirers he had around him. Unaware of the curious gray eyed gaze watching your retreating form. When you’d put enough distance between you and him you’d finally relaxed and stopped, placing a hand to your chest to calm your racing heart.

'That was embarrassing…..’

You thought your already red face going even more so.

'At least you won’t see him again, so you should be okay.’

Your mind thought making you relax more despite the burning cheeks. The thought made you at ease, a safety net of sorts. And you’d fully believed it, after all he was nearly always with a woman so he’d be busy with all the attention.

However you were wrong.

From the moment you and him made that eye contact you suddenly found yourself running into him more and more whenever you went out into town. And with each sighting of him, he seemed to grow more bolder until he’d finally spoken to you.

“Ya know, you can always say hi instead of staring at me so much. I wouldn’t mind if a pretty woman such as yourself did so.”

He’d said to you one day, smiling that charming smile. You’d frozen in surprise when he’d spoken to you, your heart skipping a beat.

“I…..I didn’t mean to stare so much Sir. I’m sorry….I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable….”

You said softly, choosing to ignore the flirtation that he’d added at the end. The man gave you another smile his expression amused by your reply.

“Nah you’re good my dear. And please call me Lupin, calling me Sir makes me feel old.”

The man Lupin said his voice chipper and good natured. You blinked up at him, somewhat shy at his presence. You weren’t used to people like Lupin speaking to you so freely. Added with his good looks it left you a little bit star struck.

“…….It’s a pleasure to meet you Lupin. My name is (Y/N).”

You finally managed to get out after a beat of silence from your end, your (S/C) cheeks heating up again. Lupin let out a small chuckle at your blushing cheeks.

“(Y/N), a lovely name for a lovely lady. Speaking of lovely, I would love to have such a woman join me for some lunch if she’d like?”

Lupin asked adding another attempt at flirting. You stared at him startled by how quick he was to hit on you and then ask you out to lunch. It honestly made you flustered and slightly jumpy.

“Ah I uh…..I would love to but I have some things I have to do.”

You said softly, making an excuse so you could mentally recover from all the attention. The man gave you a small pout before perking up again.

“No worries there’s always next time! I’ll see ya around (Y/N)!”

Lupin chirped before finally leaving you be. At the time you’d thought that that would be the end of it. But once again you were wrong. Before you knew it Lupin would talk to you whenever he saw you, chatting away while you listened quietly. He didn’t seem to mind that you weren’t talking as much as he was, which helped ease you the more you got to know each other. Before too long you found yourself speaking to him more than you usually did, and whenever you did he’d always listen attentively hanging onto your every word. It was strange yet you slowly grew to enjoy those moments with him where you both would either talk or just comfortably sit together or do things together. It was about month of doing this before you’d finally agreed to do that lunch date with him and from there the relationship between the two of you grew.

You soon found yourself thinking about him and missing his presence whenever he wasn’t around. You found yourself looking forward to your little lunch dates with him and at the time you didn’t know the reason. Until it’d happened. Everything suddenly clicked into place.

Your toes turn blue in winter, I’m gettin’ red, rum~ Does the trick for all of the things left unsaid, I’m~ Missin’ our drunken 2 A.M. strolls in K-Town~ Now you’re chasing fake highs in the Upper West Side~ And fuckin’ on Brooklyns in Brooklyn~ Your Chelseas in Chelsea~ Hope that eases the pain, so you remember to miss me~ And you sold your car, now you walk for miles~ Bet your feet feel numb~ (Crosswalks in my mind are shaky, so please hold on tight)~

It was during the middle of summer when it all came together for you. Lupin had dragged you out for a nightly stroll in the town, asking you about the sights and talking about everything and anything. You gave him the tour of sorts and listened to his ramblings, your expression soft and sincere. The two of you of you were so lost in your conversation that you didn’t realize that you’d both walked to the beach until your sandals gave away somewhat underneath the sand. Lupin stared out towards the ocean once he realized where the two of you were, his gaze lighting up at the sight. The view was gorgeous, the moon high in the sky as she shined down onto the sand and dark waves. The smell of salt and the feel of the ocean breeze hit you however you weren’t paying attention to the sight before you.

No your eyes were only on Lupin.

The monkey like man looked stunning in the moonlight. His dark brown hair a bit messy from the breeze and his gray eyes bright with delight as he took in the view. His pale skin seemed to glow in the moonlight and his face was full of a stunning smile. It was a breathtaking view in your opinion.

'He’s beautiful……’

The thought whispered in the back of your head making you stop mentally at it. Suddenly at that moment everything became clear, suddenly everything that was confusing made sense.

You were in love with him.

The realization made your heart race and your stomach erupt into butterflies and your face turn red. Lupin who had taken notice of your sudden lack of response to his musings turned to look at you and found the air in his lungs catch. Much like him, you too where bathed in the silvery beams of the moon, your (S/C) skin seeming to shimmer in it. Your beautiful (E/C) hues were stunning, full of all the things that made the world an amazing place. Your (H/L) (H/C) swayed in the breeze, painting you in an even more stunning image. At that moment Lupin wanted nothing more than to steal you away. And like any good thief worth their salt, Lupin like many was known to take what he wanted. Without thinking about it the lanky man cupped your face into his hands and gently pulled you towards him……

It was like fireworks were set off as soon as his lips touched yours. Like a burning flame was ignited in your chest as he kissed you and you responded back kissing him with everything you had. That kiss was the start of something that at the time seemed not too serious. That kiss was the start of your downfall.

~~~~~

All my demons run wild~ All my demons have your smile~ In the city of angels, in the city of angels~ Hope New York holds you~ Hope it holds you like I do~ While my demons stay faithful~ In the city of angels~ Summer’s endin’ now and the nights are coolin’ down~ Remember last winter when we would drive around?~ Silverlake, Hollywood, pretty little white lies got me good~ Thought this was love, I was misunderstood, mmm~

You bit back a bitter and heartbroken sob as you recalled the memories, desperately wiping at your eyes to stop the flow of tears.

“Why…..? Why can’t you just let me be??”

You asked in a pained whimper as you walked blindly, your tears making it hard to see. In a hazy like way the bright lights and neon signs slowly began to blend together as you blinked through the tears before they began to disappear entirely. In your heartbroken daze you didn’t realize that you had walked out of town until your shoes hit that familiar giving way of sand underneath it. Head snapping up you wiped out the tears and with a sharp pain took in the view of the very place you were just thinking about. The very beach where you fell in love with him, the very place where you were kissed and had your heart stolen before it was completely shattered a year ago. Leaving you behind with the pieces and being haunted by the phantoms of him.

You stared blankly forward as you remembered the day he shattered your heart and left you a broken woman.

~~~~~

Summer was coming to its close, and with it the tourists who would visit your hometown. Once again setting the town back into its quiet and somewhat forgotten ways.

It was during this ending season that you were left behind.

You were off to go and see Lupin wanting to tell him something important. Ever since he’d kissed you and you kissed him back you’d been thinking about things. You’d been thinking about him and what exactly you wanted to have with him. After thinking long and hard about it you’d finally came to a decision.

You were going to tell him that you loved him.

You had no idea how he’d react to such a confession, but you knew that if you didn’t say anything to him you’d regret for the rest of your life. As you made your way towards one of the familiar spots where and Lupin would meet you finally caught sight of the familiar red jacket that he always wore. A small smile started to grow on your face and you went to call out to him when you froze as you caught sight of another person. A woman, whose beauty seemed otherworldly was with him. She was gorgeous, with thick curly auburn hair and light brown eyes. Her skin was smooth and her lips were a lovely shade of red, her body curvy and eye catching. But no that wasn’t the reason why you stopped your calling out for Lupin.

It was Lupin himself.

He was staring at this woman with a soft, tender look in his eyes. His smile was softer as well, sincere and less cocky than the ones you received. He looked like a man who was in love.

And at that moment your heart was shattered.

You didn’t bother to stick around, wanting nothing more than to leave and cry in the peace of your own home. You turned around on your heel and made your way back in the direction you’d just come from refusing to look back. If you’d looked back you would have seen those familiar gray eyes zone in on your retreating figure, would have seen the devastation that flickered in them, would have seen the heartbreak of letting you go.

But you didn’t.

And you never would.

Feelin’ low on the low, drivin’ through NoHo~ If I’m honest, I’d call, but I’m trying to let go~ And I hope you’re happy, livin’ life in taxis~ But you’ll always have me, you’ll always have me~

~~~~~

You broke down then, the heart wrenching memories making you collapse in on yourself. Loud pained sobs broke through as you cried. Even after a year of not seeing him, a year of being haunted by the heartbreak you still longed for him. Even after later finding out that he was a thief you still longed for him.

You still longed for what could have been.

You still longed to be able to tell him that you loved him even though he loved another.

The pain and grief was unbearable, festering underneath the surface like an infection that was left untreated. You cried even more curling in on yourself as you let it all out. The moon and ocean being the only witnesses to you falling apart. The only witnesses to see the shell of a woman grieve. As you broke down you knew deep down that you’d never recover from this. Your heart would forever want him even though he didn’t want you. And the knowledge of it tore you up inside. You would never have Lupin.

All you’d ever have was the phantoms of what once was.

And it was never going to change.

All my demons run wild~ All my demons have your smile~ In the city of angels, in the city of angels~ Hope New York holds you~ Hope it holds you like I do~ While my demons stay faithful~ In the city of angels~

*………I have absolutely no excuse for this I apologize in advance for the pain omfg. Okay so if any y'all recall I’d written a fic called Mr. Hollywood involving Reader x Jigen and I’d decided eh what the hell I’ll try to do another one but with a different character could be fun! So I did obviously and uh it went sadder than I expected it too like dear God I’m so sorry y'all. Anyways the song is called La La Lost You by Niki it’s really sad and it gives a vibe I swear. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!!!*

Rabbits were weird little critters. At least to Jigen they were. He’d never really had a solid opinion on them, remaining rather neutral on whether he liked them or not. But at the moment that once neutral feeling towards them had quickly went to pure dislike towards the animal. The gunslinger at this moment wanted nothing more than to shoot the little monsters. And why did he want to do such a thing to such a fluffy creature?

Well to put it bluntly, a rabbit had stolen his wallet.

A white rabbit to be exact.

And come heaven or hell Jigen was going to get that wallet back even if it killed him. That had been his mindset when he’d chased the little menace in an open field, only to come to a stop at a rather large hole in the ground. Jigen glared at the large hole at the time not noting how strange it was for a small rabbit to have such a large burrow. If he hadn’t been blinded by the need to get the wallet back (it had all his money in it and it was a gift from Lupin), he would have noticed the ground giving way under his feet. But unfortunately he didn’t notice, not until the ground fell out from under him. The gunman let out a startled shout as he fell into the dark abyss that consumed him. As he fell into the dark he couldn’t help but think.

‘I hate rabbits.’

~~~~~

When Jigen had finally hit the ground he’d let out a pained hiss as his body absorbed the shock. Rubbing his aching hip and shoulder, the man looked up at where he’d fallen from and felt a sense of unease as he took in the sight. The hole which he’d fallen down from was now nothing more than a pin prick of light that shined down on him. The gunslinger cursed under his breath as the situation became more real.

“God damnit.”

He growled lowly not at all happy with how his day had turned out. He’d only wanted to relax and now here he was trapped and having his wallet taken from him. He briefly entertained the idea of contacting Lupin or Goemon only to quickly shut it down. Knowing how Lupin could be at times, Jigen knew that if the thief ever found out that he’d been robbed by a small rabbit and then fell into a hole chasing after it, he’d never hear the end of it. Pushing himself up more Jigen began to pick himself up off of the ground, dusting off his suit jacket and pants before looking at his surroundings.

“What the hell did I fall into?”

He asked baffled by how spacious the surrounding area was. As he looked his eyes quickly caught the sight of a flash of white racing away into a tunnel. Jigen didn’t hesitate as he began to race after the white rabbit which was steadily keeping a good distance from him as it raced away. The rabbit made a quick turn and disappeared around a corner, with Jigen in hot pursuit only to be greeted by the sight of the fluffy animal opening up a small door and rushing through it. The sound of the door’s lock clicking into place filled the room. Stunned by what he’d just witnessed Jigen stared at the small door, trying to process what he’d seen.

'It opened the door. That little fluffy bastard actually opened up a door can rabbits even do that????’

Jigen thought questioningly before deciding to dwell on the thought at a later date. Instead he had more important things to worry about such as the room he’d stepped into. Instead of dirt covered walls of a tunnel in a burrow, the room had actual walls in it. Elegant and homey like, complete with chairs and a table. A few paintings hung on the walls adding to the effect of the room. The gunslinger stared at the sight before him, eyes wide underneath his dark bangs and hat.

“What in the hell….?”

He breathed confused and suddenly very uneasy. What was before him shouldn’t be possible. It shouldn’t be possible for a dirty tunnel to have a fully furnished room in it. Stepping further into the room with cautious steps Jigen looked around for any sort of threats that could lurk within it. His hand was hovering over his hip, ready to grab the Magnum should the need arise. After a few beats of silence Jigen stepped further into the room taking note of the table that sat in it. It was a glass one, upon it sat a tray of treats and small cakes. Jigen reached to pick one up and examine it. The cake was small and cutesy, like something out of a little girls tea party. In elegant writing of white icing sat two words.

Eat Me.

Jigen furrowed his brow at the cake, mentally debating whether he should eat the sweet treat or not. After a bit of a mental argument with himself he finally decided to eat it. Probably not the wisest thing for him to do but he wasn’t one to turn down free food.

'What’s the worst that could happen?’

He thought as he took a bite out of the treat. An explosion of sweetness and creamy flavor hit his taste buds making him nearly choke on it. He wasn’t really a fan of sweets and it was quite obvious that whoever had made this cake had went all out with it. Placing the rest of it back down on the table Jigen made his way to the small door to try and get a good look at it. Crouching down he examined the door, noting that he was too big to fit through it. It was just big enough for the rabbit to get through it and he being human had no real chance of getting through it as well. With an annoyed frown Jigen went to stand up again only to realize that something was off. Eyes narrowed he looked over himself.

Had…..had he gotten bigger?

The gunman didn’t get a chance to really answer his question before his body seemed to grow instantaneously. With a loud shout of shock Jigen’s body grew bigger and bigger until he had to hunch over himself in order to fit into the room. His one foot was pressed up against the wall while the other was underneath his body to try and support himself. His head hit the ceiling and his shoulders were pressed up snugly against the wall as well. He could barely move from his position he realized in slight irritation and horror.

“I’m losing my mind what the hell is going on???”

Jigen asked his tone panicking just a bit before he forced himself to get a grip. He knew that if he completely lost his head, he’d be unable to get out of his current position. Scanning the room again to try and figure out a way to get himself out of the situation his gaze landed back onto the table. Surprisingly the delicate piece of furniture had remained unharmed during his insane growth spurt. However what was once on it’s clear surface was something completely different. The small cakes which once graced the tabletop were no longer there but rather a small glass bottle now sat in their place. With a small huff and a bit of squirming Jigen managed to grab it without breaking it in his large hand. Bringing it as close as he possibly could to his face he could finally make out a small note on the side of it.

Drink Me.

Staring at the bottle with an apprehensive look Jigen brought the bottle to his mouth careful not to accidentally swallow the bottle itself. The effect unlike with the cake was instantaneous. His body once huge and cramped in the room was suddenly shrinking rapidly. In a matter of moments he was suddenly the size of the rabbit he’d been chasing before. The table and chairs were giant now from his point of view. Playing with the rim of his hat Jigen tried not to let what had just occurred bother him. He had bigger fish to fry. With quick steps Jigen made his way to the door and grabbed the knob going to twist it open…..

Only for it to catch on the lock.

Jigen froze, his body tensing as frustration built up inside him. With a foreboding feeling his eyes went back to the table hoping that his suspicions would be wrong only to nearly scream in irritation as the familiar shape of a key looked through the glass at him.

“Oh fuck this.”

The gunslinger growled in irritation as he started to dig into his jacket pockets. There was no way in hell that he was going through that nonsense again. No Jigen was going to open this door his way or so help him there’d be hell to pay. After searching and emptying his pockets he finally found what he’d been looking for. A lock picking kit. The man didn’t waste anymore time and got to work to pick lock. After a few clicks and clangs he finally heard the lock unlocking. With a smug grin Jigen pushed the door open and with a confident stride made his way through its doorway.

~~~~~

When Jigen had finally stepped through to the other side he was nearly blinded by bright sunshine in his face. Blinking rapidly and pulling his hat further over his eyes Jigen took in the world around him. Sunshine and bright flowers and plants greeted him, the sounds of nature invading his ears. Mushrooms towered over him as well as grass and flowers. Jigen’s mouth opened up in a slight gap as he took it all in. He was so taken in by the insanity of it that he barely noticed the figure perched on top of one of the mushrooms.

“If you keep your mouth open like that you’re gonna catch flies!”

A chipper voice shattered the air. A familiar chipper voice, one that Jigen would know anywhere. Head snapping up his dark eyed stare landed on the person in front of him.

“Lupin????”

He asked dumbfounded by the sight of his friend. Jigen nearly let out a sound of relief at seeing a familiar face before he stiffened slightly as he took in the rest of Lupin. While his face and body were the same there were also differences on his friend.

Such as the two white rabbit ears sitting on top of his head.

Jigen let out a strained kind of noise at the sight of the rabbit ears and tried not to completely lose it.

“It’s official I must be tripping or suffering from a concussion.”

Jigen said not knowing whether he should lose it or laugh at how ridiculous Lupin looked with rabbit ears. The gunslinger then noticed that Lupin was holding something, something extremely familiar.

“My wallet-!”

Jigen hissed going to make a grab for it. Lupin or rather the white rabbit was quicker than Jigen however and evaded the swiping hands reaching for said wallet.

“Hey now that’s rather rude! Trying to grab things out of people’s hands! Haven’t you ever heard of manners?”

The rabbit asked his voice a bit huffy yet his light grey eyes were mischievous and playful.

“Manners?! You stole my wallet and I want it back Peter Cottontail!”

Jigen snapped somewhat at the Lupin look alike. Lupin just gave Jigen a raised eyebrow, his gaze still full of amusement and mischief. It was honestly unnerving how uncannily similar the white rabbit was to his Lupin. They had the same look, the same eyes, the same everything really. It was somewhat messing with Jigen’s head a bit which was making him react rather snappily.

“Peter Cottontail? That’s a new one! You’ve got a gift for nicknames huh?”

Lupin asked his tone playful. Jigen tried not to let it effect him too much given that this wasn’t actually Lupin and that none of this could be real. However it was rather difficult.

“As for your wallet I think I’ll keep it. It’s rather nice after all and I’ve been needing one myself.”

The man said with a small hum of satisfaction at his prize.

“Oi-! If you think I’m gonna let you run off with my wallet you’ve got another thing coming you little menace-”

Jigen began to spit only to be cut off by laughter. Snapping his focus on to Lupin, the other man was laughing clutching his stomach somewhat as his eyes crinkled with mirth.

“Calm down no need to get so worked up! I’ll happily give you back your wallet my dearest!”

Lupin said his tone light and full of laughter however Jigen was instantly on high alert. Lupin willingly given back what he’d stolen? That was nearly unheard of, in fact the whole thing was making Jigen tense. He knew his partner better than anyone and this whole thing was completely out there. Lupin wasn’t someone who just gave things back, not unless there was something in it for him.

“I’ll give back your wallet……after you catch me.”

Lupin said a sudden smirk on his face. Jigen barely had a chance to process it before Lupin disappeared from sight taking off leaving only a small dust cloud behind him. The gunslinger stared at the spot where Lupin had been before letting out a loud groan that echoed somewhat into the vastness of the surrounding area. A game of tag and chase where Lupin would get to have his fun and Jigen could possibly get his wallet back. This was exactly what he’d been waiting for somewhat. Jigen ran a hand over his face wondering why his mind would come up with something like this in the first place.

“Looks like I’ve got no choice.”

The gunman grumbled as he began to pursue the white menace with Lupin’s face on it. Despite the irritation at the situation Jigen was also somewhat amused by Lupin’s little game. At least he’d have something to focus on as he tried to either snap out of this weird thing he was in or if it was a real thing find a way out of it. With that in mind Jigen continued onwards after the white rabbit.

~~~~~

“Where the hell am I?”

Jigen muttered as he stared at the crossroads before him. Some time had passed since he continued his pursuit of the white rabbit with Lupin’s face and during this time he’d learned several things. The place he was in was apparently called Wonderland. It was a rather strange and ridiculous place where everything and everyone was either backwards or straight up full of nonsense. Nothing had any order to it and it was basically a game of Russian roulette in trying to figure out what was what. He’d also learned that his suit was no longer his suit when he’d passed by a stream of water on his journey.

His usual suit which was black with a royal purple dress shirt had been replaced with a bright white one. The shirt underneath this white ensemble was a mixture of light blue and teal. His hat was also white and the only thing that remained the same was his shoes and tie. It’d been quite a shock seeing the sudden change in his clothing yet he didn’t dwell on it. Another thing he’d learned was to never eat anything or drink anything with wording on it. After another incident involving him growing and shrinking he’d made sure to not go messing with that kind of thing. And the final thing he’d learned just recently was that signs in Wonderland were completely and utterly useless.

Which was why he was now stuck at the crossroads. The man stared at the signs, each of them saying nonsense things or things that were the complete opposite of what they should have been. It was a mess of random things and it made him grouchy somewhat when he couldn’t figure them out. Scratching at his beard mindlessly Jigen tried to figure out a plan for what he should do next when a voice spoke up, startling him.

“My, my it looks like someone’s lost.”

A voice purred in amusement. Jigen didn’t hesitate as he pulled out his gun and pointed it in the direction of where the voice came from.

“Come out and show yourself unless you want to have a face full of led.”

Jigen said his tone hard and leaving no room for argument. The voice let out a small huff not bothered by the gun before a body suddenly appeared before Jigen. A large feline of different shades of pinks and purples sat on a tree branch, it’s large fluffy tail flickering lazily. Large unfocused eyes stared straight into Jigen making the gunman’s skin break out into goosebumps.

“A face full of led doesn’t sound like a fun time, however I wouldn’t be above giving it a try.”

The cat said sounding unfazed by the threat of possibly being shot. Most people should Jigen had his gun focused on them wouldn’t be so calm and unbothered like this feline. Then again it seemed as if people of Wonderland didn’t really care about things like that. It was something that made Jigen uneasy.

“Where are you going if I may ask?”

The cat asked keeping its gaze on Jigen.

“I’m trying to find the white rabbit. Do you happen to know where he’d be at?”

The gunman asked his own gaze honed in on the feline. The cat seemed to perk up at the mention of Lupin and to Jigen’s horror a large smile grew on its face.

“Ah yes him! Let me guess he took something from you? He has a habit of doing that, in fact he’s quite famous for it. I personally don’t know where he’d be at….”

The cat said trailing off and making Jigen’s jaw tighten as he was met with what appeared to be a dead end.

“But I do know someone who knows what you want to know.”

The feline finished its large cheshire grin growing more.

“Oh?”

Jigen asked somewhat intrigued yet weary by the information. The large feline gave a small nod in confirmation.

“In fact he’s almost as infamous as your white rabbit. If anyone can give you some answers it’d be him. Just go straight to the right and continue on the road until you see a house. That’s where you’ll find him…..supposedly.”

The cheshire cat said ominously. The gunslinger gave a tight nod wanting nothing more than to leave and not see the creature again. Without another word Jigen began to make his way to the right side of the crossroads.

“Good luck Jigen~”

The cat said with an unhinged giggle making the man stop dead in his tracks. Whipping back around Jigen was met with nothing but the sight of trees and other natural things. The cheshire cat was no longer in the trees having disappeared into thin air. Jigen’s heart was pounding in his chest and his skin broke out into a cold sweat as he practically sped away from the area rattled.

'How did it know his name?’

He had no answer.

*Yeet tis I your boy back at it again with insanity! So I’d recently came across this blog in the lupin the third fandom and y'all they make the most amazing artwork!! In fact this Wonderland AU piece was inspired by their artwork!!! @theevilemster does amazing artwork for their AU and I’m telling y'all you need to check it out ASAP. Like for real their art is amazing. I basically wrote this because I was heavily inspired by their work and once I’d started writing it rolled away from me lol. I apologize in advance if this sucks and if the characters are OOC, I tried my best with it sgdgdgg. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!! And please check out the artist their artwork is totally worth it!!*

Super Lonely

Warning: Slight mentions of depression, if that makes y'all uncomfortable I highly recommend y'all check out my other works!!

I know I fucked up, I’m just a loser~ Shouldn’t be with ya, guess I’m a quitter~ While you’re out there drinkin’, I’m just here thinkin’~ ‘Bout where I should’ve been~ I’ve been lonely, mm, ah, yeah~

The house was quiet. Not a single sound was heard throughout it, making it seem like a empty tomb than a home. Yet despite the silence of the place there was a sign of life in it. Laying on the carpeted floor of a lavish living room, was Francis Bonnefoy or better known to many as France. An empty wine glass sat next to him, having been drained awhile ago. The Frenchman was staring at his ceiling with a somewhat blank expression on his face. He didn’t move from his spot on the floor, instead he let himself get lost in his head. Memories and hazy half made thoughts drifted around in his head, making him detached from reality to an extent. It wasn’t often that the French nation did this type of thing, yet today from the moment he’d woken up he knew that it was going to be one of those days.

One of those days where he had no energy to do anything. One of those days where he wanted nothing more than to just disappear from the rest of the world for awhile so he could be left alone with his thoughts. It wasn’t often that he got these days, where even the smallest of things seemed to be overwhelming. Yet when he did experience those days it was an absolute struggle. Depression was a rather terrible thing, making him feel like he was completely buried by everything and throwing him into a slump. Francis took a deep breath, his azure blue hues full of nothing but exhaustion. He gently closed his eyes to try and rest, listening to his surroundings. The gentle sounds of the rain outside his home filled his ears, the light water droplets hitting his windows in a steady manner. In a way it was somewhat soothing, as if the weather was trying to help him. Yet at the same time the rain also made him ache in a bitter way. It reminded him that even though he didn’t want to be around people, he was still isolated. A spectator who was watching the world through its windows, feeling helpless and stuck in the same place.

'But hasn’t it always been this way? Hasn’t he always been isolated in some way, shape or form? Forever cursed to never really be in the company of others?’

Francis took another deep breath as the questions swam in his head. It was a sad and tragic truth that he didn’t like to dwell on. Despite being surrounded by many people, Francis was still oh so very isolated from everyone. To many he was known to be a flirt and a day dreamer. He could be perverted and crude and annoying if he really wanted to. Yet underneath all of it he felt extremely alone. Separated from everything and everyone in a way that it overwhelmed him some days. For centuries he was alone, always losing those who were important to him. A flash of an old memory hit him of a woman with short blondish brown hair and intelligent bluish green eyes. He sucked in a sharp breath fighting the response that he always had when he thought of her.

'It’s been centuries Francis, don’t let it pull you further into this abyss.’

He told himself fighting the rising ache he was feeling. It was consuming, almost like it was slowly pulling him down like quicksand.

Water pouring down from the ceiling~ I knew this would happen, still hard to believe it~ Maybe I’m dramatic, I don’t wanna seem it~ I don’t wanna panic~

As the Frenchman tried to pull himself together he was hit with more thoughts and emotions, each beginning to weigh on him more and beginning to drown him. All the memories of his mistakes and losses and moments of tragedy that he’d experienced. All the pain and uncertainty and exhaustion that he had, always waiting to strike him down and keep him there. The emotional turmoil he began to feel made him spiral into his head, making his throat tighten and his eyes burn. Why? Why did today have to be a bad day? He’d been doing so well to and now here he was, completely losing it. As the Frenchman let out a few shaky gasps he was suddenly startled by the loud chiming coming from his pants pocket.

It was his cellphone.

He’d gotten a message.

Hands trembling he pulled out the cell, his vision blurred slightly from the tears. Mistyping his code a few times he finally managed to get it open just as it chimed again. Opening the messaging app Francis was greeted by the familiar sight of his messages. Several read ones from Ludwig, Matthew, Feliciano and Alfred hit his gaze first before landing on the unopened ones. Tapping on the unread messages he was greeted by the sight of a group chat that had been made awhile ago. Two new messages were in the chat.

'Oi you bearded bastard, where are you? You were supposed to be here today?’

The first message said, the familiar texting style letting Francis know who exactly sent it. The only one who called him that was none other than his fellow nation England or as Francis called him Arthur. His eyes scanned the second message in the chat.

'Yo Franny! Arthur’s been trying to reach you where are you at?’

The second message read, this one from his other fellow nation Prussia or rather Gilbert. Francis was debating on whether he should answer the messages or just put his phone away and go back to his depressive down spiral when his cell chimed again, a third message coming into the group chat.

'Francis mi amigo you’re starting to worry us. Is everything okay?’

The third message said, the last one belonging to Spain or rather Antonio. That was the final nail in the coffin. The Frenchman’s hands began to tremble more, the tears falling down faster.

I’m a sad girl, in this big world~ It’s a mad world~ All of my friends~ Know what’s happened~ You’re a bad thing~

At the lack of response his phone chimed again this time the message from Arthur.

'We’re coming over.’

Francis stared at the message his brain not processing the words on his screen. Turning his cell off he put it next to him and covered his eyes with his arms, silent tears staining his cheeks. It felt like he was in that position for a millennia, just slowly falling apart on his living room floor. He barely twitched when the familiar sound of his front door being unlocked sounded out. Three pairs of footsteps made their way into the large home, one of them being lighter and quicker than the other two. The first pair made their way into the living room and a sharp intake of air was heard before they quickly made their way towards him. Gentle yet firm hands grabbed at his arms.

“Bloody hell Francis…..why didn’t you say something?”

Arthur’s voice spoke to him, soft and gentle. The complete opposite of the usual crisp and irritated tone he usually had. The two other men had finally entered the living room and caught sight of the duo.

“Ver damnit Francis, you should have called us.”

Gilbert’s voice scolding and upset came from his one side.

“Amigo we could have helped you sooner.”

Antonio chimed in his tone anxious and saddened. Francis felt Arthur slowly pull him up into a sitting position.

“Let’s get you onto the sofa yeah? You’ve probably been on the floor for quite a bit.”

The Englishman said as he went to help him up from the floor. As Arthur did this Gilbert had grabbed the empty wine glass and Francis’s cellphone so it wouldn’t be stepped on. Antonio began to make his way towards the kitchen.

“I’ll go make you something warm to drink. You’ll need it from being on a cold floor.”

The Spaniard said sweetly offering his friend a small smile to try and help ease him before disappearing from sight. Gilbert with the wine glass and cellophane in his grasp placed them on the glass coffee table and jogged towards the grand staircase.

“I’ll go get some blankets. Arthur you stay with him and keep an eye on him.”

The Prussian said his tone stern. Arthur resisted the urge to sigh at it and gave him a small nod. Satisfied Gilbert disappeared up the stairs leaving the two nations be. Francis leaned against Arthur as the smaller man helped him onto the sofa. With a confronting grip on him the grouchy nation set Francis on the soft cushions before sitting down beside him. With a small tug Arthur pulled Francis’s head into his lap and began to gently run his fingers through his long blonde hair.

“You could have told us it was a bad day. We would have been here sooner you know?”

Arthur asked his voice full of concern and sincerity. Francis felt his eyes burn at his friend’s honesty and gripped his pants leg.

“I didn’t want to worry you petit lapin….”

The older nation spoke softly his voice cracking a bit from the lack of use and his tears. Arthur just stared at him, his movements pausing. Francis felt his heart sink a bit at the action, a small feeling of insecurity hitting him. Arthur had finally had enough of it, he finally wanted to wash his hands of the Frenchman. However he wasn’t expecting the smaller hand to gently cup his cheek and tilt his head up. The French nation felt his breath stop at the gaze he was met with. Bright green eyes full of concern and sincerity and slight affection stared into his dark blue ones.

“Francis Bonnefoy. You will never trouble me with these things, neither will you trouble Toni and Gilbert with them either. We care about you and want to be there for you when you’re struggling. So please don’t think such nonsense…..”

The English nation said his tone serious. Francis looked at him taken aback by the honest words. The tears began to fall faster and he buried his head into the younger nation’s stomach, wrapping his arms around him in an embrace. Arthur rubbed his shoulders, petting his head in a gentle manner, letting Francis cry into his stomach.

I know I fucked up, I’m just a loser~ Shouldn’t be with ya, guess I’m a quitter~ While you’re out there drinkin’, I’m just here thinkin’~ 'Bout where I should’ve been~ I’ve been lonely, mm, ah, yeah~ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la~ Lonely (I’m a lonely chic)~ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la~ Lonely (Supalonely)~

As the two held each other Antonio came into the living room, a small tray holding four steaming mugs of his spiced hot chocolate. The Spaniard paused at the scene making the Englishman look up at him. Two pair of green eyes began to have a silent conversation with one another, conveying the situation. Once it was understood Antonio made his way towards the sofa and placed the tray onto the coffee table.

“Mi querido amigo, I brought you a cup of my famous hot chocolate just for you~”

Antonio cooed somewhat to try and get Francis out of Arthur’s stomach. Francis turned his head towards his other friend his gaze debating for only a second before he finally and reluctantly pulled himself from Arthur and sat himself up on the sofa. Antonio smiled brightly, pleased to finally get a reaction out of his friend. With almost hesitant hands Francis reached out for a mug. Once Francis got his Antonio grabbed one and passed it to Arthur. The English nation took it with a small grateful smile making the Spanish nation beam even more. It was then that Gilbert finally appeared into the living room, his arms full of blankets and pillows.

“So the awesome me couldn’t choose between the blankets or pillows so I decided to just grab the both of them.”

Gilbert said sounding pleased at his forethought. Antonio perked up at the mention of blankets and pillows.

“Ah-! We can make a pile of them on the sofa and cuddle in them while we drink out cocoa!”

Antonio chimed in an excited way. Gilbert seemed to instantly perk up at the suggestion his red eyes bright with childish glee.

“Ja! Great idea Toni! We’re going to make the most awesome pile in the world!”

The Prussian said confident. As the two of them began to plan they suddenly turned to the other duo of their group.

“Hey Arthur! You should totally help out, since you make some comfortable piles!”

Gilbert said a smirk on his face. Antonio turned his attention towards the Englishman his face almost sparkling in a way.

“Si! You and Francis can work together while me and Gilbert work together!”

Antonio chirped happily. Arthur gave them a small look before looking at Francis.

“I don’t mind, are you up for it Francis or do you want to sit it out?”

Arthur asked his eyes questioning and obversing his friend. Francis blinked owlishly at the younger nation not expecting to be spoken to quite so soon before looking at his two other fellow nations.

“Amigo you don’t have to if you don’t want to. It won’t bother us either way.”

The Spaniard said his tone softer than it was before.

“Ja we can handle it if you don’t want to Fran.”

Gilbert chimed in reassuringly. The Frenchman stared at the trio for a moment or two, his expression thoughtful. After a beat of silence Francis finally answered.

“Oui, I would like to if you don’t mind.”

He said earning three looks of relief and various levels of enthusiasm. Antonio begin the most enthusiastic of them and Gilbert being the second closest. Arthur kept his enthusiasm at a more subdued level, not wanting to overwhelm the older nation.

“Fantástico! Let’s get started then!”

The Spaniard cheered happily already going to get started.

“Hey slow down you Attrappe! Let me have some blankets-”

The Prussian somewhat childish complained going to join him. The Brit just shook his head in exasperation at the display before returning his attention to the Frenchman.

“We’d better get started if we’re going to keep of with them.”

Arthur said with a small sigh of sorts. Francis felt his lips twitch a bit at the Brit’s sigh of exasperation. For the first time since his day began he felt his heart lighten.

“Oui but of course.”

He replied with a half smile. The genuine emotion from the older man made the younger one smile at him. The group of four spent the rest of the afternoon putting blankets and pillows on and around the sofa, making it as comfortable and as perfect as possible. Once they’d done it they spent a good chunk of time snuggled within them, sipping Antonio’s delicious hot chocolate and just talking to each other. As the day drifted away Francis slowly felt himself lighten up. The emotional turmoil and suffocating isolation he’d been feeling becoming not as overwhelming as it was earlier. Granted it wasn’t gone completely, after all having bad days as awful as this one it wasn’t magically cured in a day. But being surrounded by the three people that he loved dearly and being in their presence helped him cope a little bit better than he would have if they hadn’t shown up.

Before they knew it the day had dwindled away and evening was upon them. The sounds of their voices covering the noise of the rain that had grown heavier in its course. Antonio had made dinner and the small group ate and conversed. Francis had let out a few small huffs of laughter and a few smiles that evening which made the others preen at the sight of it. After they’d gotten done with dinner and cleaned up they made their way back to their pile and snuggled back into the warm blankets. As the night began to fully take over the four of them slowly grew drowsy, leaning against each other. Francis was leaning against Antonio while Arthur was somewhat curled up into Francis’s side. Gilbert was on the other side of Arthur leaning against the smaller man slightly. Francis stared at them, his gaze gentle and fond. He had no idea what he’d do without Arthur, Antonio and Gilbert in his life. The trio made his life complete and made his bad days slightly more bearable. A feeling of gratitude and affection settled into his chest.

“Merci mes amis je vous aime.”

The French nation whispered meaning every word of it.

“No es un problema te amo también.”

The Spanish nation replied just as softly.

“Ja, wir lieben dich auch, es war kein Problem.”

The Prussian nation said into the quiet atmosphere.

“We’ll always be here for you, we love you and we’ll always be there.”

The English nation said soft and sincere. Francis smiled a small genuine smile feeling loved. He knew that he was always going to have bad days, that his depression wasn’t going to completely go away.

But he was willing to face those days. Because having his beloved companions by his side, he knew without a doubt that he’d be fine.

*So today is a day where my mind is wandering because I’m literally iced into my house (thanks Ohio winters) so I’m just kinda lowkey down by all the constant snow. So what better way to go with the motions than with writing. I went with Francis because it’s an actual canon fact that he has days were he kinda just goes quiet and somewhat depressed in a way, making him a very relatable boi. Plus SupaLonely by Benee is a bop. I just basically wanted some mindless fluff involving these lads and the relationship they could possibly have if they were able to interact more. Whether their relationship is platonic or romantic is completely up to y'all sgdgdgdgdh. Translations for the ending sentences: Ja, wir lieben dich auch, es war kein Problem means Ya we love you as well, it was no trouble in German. No es un problema te amo también means It’s not a problem, love you too in Spanish. And finally Merci mes amis je vous aime means Thank you my friends, I love you in French. This was from Google translate so I apologize if they’re inaccurate shsgdgf. Anyways if any y'all read this I hope you enjoyed it!!!!*