For the theme of “Gratitude,” I decided to do a self portrait with lots of injuries to symbolize all the times I’ve gotten knocked down in my life. Every setback has made me more interesting and more wise, and I would not be the artist I am today without having taken a few mental beatings! Here’s to the last month of QuickDraw and to a Happy New Year!
I saw The Bad Guys and then @fanfic-inator795 gave me an angsty idea that I had to draw immediately. So if you want someone to blame thank, go to her! (but seriously she writes excellent fanfiction and you should check her out!)
Summary: “You?! Why would I trust you? You have brought me nothing but failure. Time and time again; nothing but disappointment!”
His father’s words might have been a result of his possession by the White Bone Spirit, but whether or not they were his true thoughts, Red Son vows to prove them wrong. To do so he seeks to attain a power strong enough to destroy his father’s immortal enemy. After all, he’d much rather throw fire at his problems.
Word Count: 3551
Ratings/Warnings: Teen and up; injury, burns, angst and hurt/comfort, toxic thoughts caused by toxic parents, panic attacks, abuse.
Notes: FIGHT SCENE TIME!
Credits: Big thanks to @painted-arachnidand@simplyfornardo for helping me bounce ideas off of them. And also thanks to @lemonsqueazie for providing me with “Journey to the West” lore. I don’t know much about the original novel or other iterations, but I still tried to keep some things compliant with the lore. You should check all of them out, since they’re really great content creators with neat ideas!
Red Son’s cries are not getting through. He grips at his robes anxiously, as the machinery continues to suck the life and energy out of the Monkie Kid. He looks around frantically, trying to make sense of the combination of magic and machinery of the mech. He isn’t sure if it’s the stress of the situation or if even his mechanical skills have simply left him, but he’s stuck there not knowing what to do. Even when the zaps fade and Red Son could grasp at the webs that are holding MK again, they don’t budge, and the boy does not stir. He tries to rouse him, calling his name again, and patting his cheek, but all he gets in return is a tired groan from the Monkie Kid.
“Come on, you can’t just give up now!” he says out loud, but he isn’t sure if the statement is for Noodle Boy’s sake or for his own. A distressed whine grows in his throat, which bursts into a short screech when the noise of someone entering the cavernous area echoes around the chamber.
He spins around to see the Spider Queen come out of the shadows and into the room. It sounds like she is dragging something behind her, but Red Son can’t see beyond her large spider-like body. Raising an eyebrow in momentary surprise as she notices Red Son’s presence, she walks in and gives the room a once over. Once she is content that nothing is out of place, her prideful and confident smile is back on her face.
“You’re back, Red Boy!” She sounds more pleased than Red Son feels comfortable with. “But are you back for me? Or for them?” From behind her, she whips around a few bundles of webs and throws them in front of Red Son.
He notices quickly that the webbing holds all the Monkie Kid’s friends captive, but the one that his eyes grow wide and fearful at is the one containing Sandy.
He looks so… defeated. Though he dwarfs his companions, the large man seems so small in the webs. His face is pale, and there’s a sunken nature to his eyes, not in terms of health, but in terms of spirit. There’s a shame and powerlessness on his features, that Red Son had never seen on him, and never wants to see again. Red Son’s heart sinks to the floor. The man does not stir, and for a moment Red Son is terrified that his lack of movement isn’t just caused by the tangled webs.
He lets out a shaky breath he wasn’t aware he was holding. “Sandy…?” he whispers, fearing the worst.
Immediately, the face of Sandy perks up and looks up at him. Though tied up and on the ground, Sandy’s face shifts into a bright and hopeful smile. “Red Son! You’re okay! You came back!”
Red Son inwardly breathes a sigh of relief. That’s more of the Sandy he knows, though there’s a shadow across his features that doesn’t go away. Still Red Son shares a small smile. “O-of course, you big oaf! I was trying to free Noodle Boy, but my plans didn’t factor in you all being captured as well!”
Sandy laughs sheepishly. But is cut off by an annoyed groan from the Spider Queen behind them.
“Ugh, well I’m sorry to cut short this oh so joyful reunion, but I must set up my new batteries,” she finishes with a smile. Spider Queen whips the webbing holding the captive group around and they hit the wall with a smack, webs sticking them in place so they don’t fall.
Red Son flinches at the sound, then brings his arms up reaching out, yelling, “No!” He swerves to Spider Queen. “You dishonorable cur! You can’t!”
“And why can’t I?” She saunters over to him. “What is a powerless brat like you going to do about it?” She sweeps a leg around him and kicks him to the floor. He lands with an “oof” and looks up at her indignantly, as she strings along the webs, linking Sandy and the others to the machinery. Then she flips a few switches and says to herself, “Now, let’s see how this works…”
Red Son’s eyes widen as the machines whirr to life and the zapping starts again. However, this time, Noodle Boy isn’t the only one crying out in pain. The engines purr even louder and the lights in the mech glow brighter as power is now being drained from all of them. And again, it is Sandy’s cries of pain that shatter Red Son’s heart the most.
Before he is even thinking about it, Red Son rushes over to Sandy and tugs at the webs binding him. Upon grasping the webs, the effect is immediate and it’s all Red Son can do to keep his knees from buckling under him as the contact causes the energy surges to course through him as well. But he does not let go. He can hear Sandy speak in between grunts as he tugs at the webs around his chest, “Red Son… no! You… have to leave!”
But Red Son has always been stubborn. He grits out, “You never left me!” He struggles between spasms to pull more. “I’m not leaving you behind!” Red Son knows that there is little chance for him to break the webs, but he clings to them, desperately trying to free his friend.
The feeling is awful. It’s reminiscent of when his father was sucking his fire powers out of him. Like being drained, but with energy surges flowing in the wake of each pull. It felt like every pool of strength left inside him was draining; every pore being forcibly opened up, the last vestiges of his own power being taken. He feels electricity and hot iron rush through his body, and he yells, adrenaline pulsing and urging him to tug at the webs harder and harder despite the pain and the pull of power getting stronger.
Suddenly, there’s a large zap of some sort of feedback and something that feels like his ears popping, except that it’s from his whole body. It’s different from when he was messing with the controls. This felt like a pulse reverberating from inside him. He’s pushed back, away from the webbing, and thrown to the ground, crumpling in a sizzling heap.
He lays there gasping for breath, his whole body feeling like pins and needles, as if all of his limbs fell asleep and are waking up. There’s a ringing in his ears, but he can tell that the screaming from the others has at least stopped. He chances opening his eyes, which still have stars dancing around them, but confirms that the others don’t seem to be in pain anymore. At least they seem awake, minus the Monkie Kid. Sandy calls his name, but Red Son can only blink blearily at him.
There is a scoff above him and he shifts his head to see Spider Queen looking at him derisively. “Well that was anti-climactic. What were you hoping to accomplish with that little feat? For a genius mechanic, you really are such a stupid little boy. At this point I don’t know if I should hook you up to my machines to drain out what’s left of your demonic essence or just continue to watch you do that to yourself.” She lets out a tittering laugh and Red Son can only lay there, clenching his fists in anger and frustration and uselessness.
It is too much. The inability to do anything. Seeing his newfound comrades in danger and pain. Seeing Sandy, the man who had helped him get to where he was now, suffering the same fate as the Noodle Boy. And there Red Son is. Useless. And being the cause of all this in the first place. It is too much. And he is furious. At himself. And especially at the one bringing harm to them.
He grinds his teeth, his hair bristles, and an angry heat rises in his chest. Not one of shame, or of rage. But of a righteous fury he hasn’t felt in years. His body, which once felt cold and empty and drained, is filled with a warm energy. It spreads through his body, bubbles up to his throat, and as he growls, smoke wafts out of his mouth.
His eyes flash up to Spider Queen, hot red streaks trailing in their wake. His body tenses and he springs up from the ground in a sudden burst of energy, a ring of ember-like sparks crackling around him. Faster than even he can register, he rockets off the ground, slamming his now fiery frame into Spider Queen.
She lets out a surprised cry of pain as she is thrown several feet, and skitters to a halt, her eight legs catching her before she could fall. She looks up at her new foe. Sandy and his companions share her shocked expression as they all stare at Red Son.
Red Son is standing there, red flames licking around his form. He lets out a few puffs of breath, and looks at the fire dancing around him at his command, almost in disbelief. He lets the flames slither through his fingertips, soaking in the warmth and the power that he thought he had lost. A smile twitches at his lips and he laughs a hearty laugh, somewhere between excitement and mania, which echoes around the cave-like base, as he realizes what happened. “Your webs! Your stupid webs, with their energy-sucking! They must’ve opened up the last bits of my power that were hidden, even from me! You dumb spider!” His cackles stop and the mirth drops from his voice. He lights fireballs in his palms, as he turns a fierce glare at Spider Queen. “You will be letting my companions go at once, Spider Queen.”
Spider Queen glares right back, cold and angry. “No one commands me, child! With your powers back, your flames will simply become added kindling for my Arachnoid Base.” Then she gives a battle cry and charges at Red Son.
Red Son leaps to meet her, punching with a fiery fist. For a larger opponent, she is surprisingly nimble and fast. She dodges easily and lashes out with a few strikes of her own with her legs. Red Son spins out of the way and thrusts a couple of fire balls towards her. She parries his fists and skitters around him, attempting to hit him from behind, but he stomps down with pulses of flames spreading out from below him, causing her to jump back out of range.
From here, she spits out a web, which latches onto Red Son’s chest, and pulls him in. He sees her lift a leg up to meet him, but he quickly burns through the web tugging at him, then pushes out a blast of fire towards her. She shoots out another web, though this time at an adjacent wall, and pulls herself out of the line of fire.
She flings a much larger, net-like web at Red Son. He disintegrates the net before it can reach him, but through the puff of flame he has lost track of where she is standing. Suddenly, a heavy weight slams into his side as Spider Queen appears beside him and uses her bulkier form to throw the fire demon to the ground. He rolls harshly across the floor, but regains his footing, sparks of flame spitting from beneath his feet, and thrusts both of his arms towards Spider Queen sending another blast of fire her way.
She nimbly dodges out of the way again, then gets in close, swiping at Red Son with the sharpened edges of her spider legs. Red Son leaps back, boosted by a rocket of fire from his feet, but isn’t able to fully dodge the strike and a spider claw slashes through the front of his robes and knicks his skin.
He tries to light some sparks at their feet to create some distance between himself and the Spider Queen, but noticing the flames, she shifts her position to the ceiling, skittering along it and stabbing down at him from above. Red Son steps back, but finds himself backed into a corner. He manages to duck out of the way of a strike and roll forward.
He tries to put some distance between the two of them, and rockets across the room. He whips around for a ranged attack, but somehow she’s there occupying the space directly behind him, and thrusting a swipe down at him. He sends flames towards the strike, but she cuts through the fire and lands a jagged slash across his shoulder.
He is slammed to the ground, and the impact shudders through him as he catches himself with his arms and knees. He clutches at his now bleeding arm and looks up vengefully at Spider Queen. She shakes away some flames left on her leg, but seems unfazed, a hint of a smirk playing at her lips.
Red Son only just got his powers back and is rusty. Spider Queen is at the top of her game being powered up by an already powered up Monkie Kid and his friends. She knows she has the upper hand, and Red Son knows it too.
He looks past her to see the others still tangled in webs and unable to move. They are looking at him with a mix of shock, worry, and a bit of determination. Sandy looks especially worried for Red Son which echoes the fire demon’s own worry for the blue giant. He moves his gaze to the Monkie Kid whose eyes have finally opened, but still seems to be battling consciousness. Yet, his gaze attempts to stay on the fire demon. Red Son looks at him meaningfully. He realizes that he has to fight smarter if he wants to win.
With a shaky, but renewed resolve, Red Son thrusts flames from beneath his palms, still on the ground, causing fire to spread under the spider demon. He forces a column of flame to sprout up from under her. She leaps back, some of the fire singeing her as she dodges.
Now with a little space between them, Red Son flings several fireballs in her direction, all of which fly past her as she moves cleverly around the space. He begins to rotate, trying to circle around her and gain a good angle, but she is agile as well and swings at him with some attacks of her own. Red Son is only just able to dodge them with some of the swipes ripping through the fabric of his clothes.
He slaps his hands together letting a pulse of fire ripple out. She uses a string of webs to pull herself out of the way, and another to swing back around, and smack into Red Son again. He isn’t able to fully catch himself this time, and his head connects with the ground. Mind spinning, and head throbbing, it’s only on instinct that he is able to send waves of fire out around him to keep the Spider Queen away, as he wobbles back to a standing position.
Unfortunately, he’s all but lost track of where she went, and taking advantage of his unsteady legs, she spits a wad of webbing at his feet, just enough to put him off balance. He quickly burns it away, but not before Spider Queen is able to come up behind him and land a harsh blow to his back.
Red Son cries out in pain, which turns to a snarl as he throws fire in a sweeping arc behind him. Again, she is too quick to be hit and bounces out of the way, throwing another string of webbing at him. Slowed down by his wounds, he is unable to dodge and this one wraps around Red Son’s legs, which are pulled out from under him. She swings him through the air and he lands with a hard smack on his already injured back. Red Son lets out a gasp of pain as his breath gets knocked out of his body.
He lays there helpless on the floor wheezing and trying to pull air back into his body. His lungs refuse to fill properly, and all he can manage is some keening whimpers.
Spider Queen catches her breath and laughs as she saunters over to him. He stares at her wild-eyed, still trying to focus on his breathing, but he can’t do much more than that, and he’s forced to lay there and wait, until she slowly looms over his prone form.
“Congratulations on getting your powers back.” She sneers haughty. “You put up quite a fight, but all you’ve done is given me yet another energy source to pull from.”
Red Son manages a few gasping breaths, finally sucking in some air through his nostrils. He closes his eyes to quickly center himself, before looking back up at the spider demon defiantly. He lets out a tired laugh and responds with a sneer of his own. “Too bad your main ‘battery’ might have something to say about that…” His gaze shifts behind her, and he gives a knowing smile.
“What..?!” Spider Queen gasps. She turns around to see the Monkie Kid standing behind her, free of his webs and staff at the ready. She looks behind him, confused to see the webs that had held him, and his companions slowly disintegrating with freshly burnt cinders. Red Son’s flames had missed her, but they had hit their intended mark.
Upon realizing what all of his fire bursts were really meant for, she shouts at Red Son “YOU!” She whips around, raising a sharp leg over the defeated fire demon, and swings down towards his chest. Red Son just lays there, unmoving, smirk still on his lips.
Before the blow can land, it is as if her form disappears; replaced with a much enlarged form of Monkie Kid’s staff.
The Noodle Boy grows the magical staff long, flinging the Spider Queen across the base, through the machinery, and clear on to outside until she is lost on the horizon. With his full powers released, in just a moment, the Spider Queen has been defeated.
With nothing left to power it and no one to command it, there is a momentary pause where the Arachnoid Base goes still. Then it creaks and groans, as the metal caves in on itself, followed by a noticeable drop as the outer legs collapse, and the whole thing shuts down. Luckily, the main room is structurally sound enough that it does not collapse on the heroes inside, and only some debris and dust is kicked up with the motion.
Red Son sputters, a dull pain wracking through his body as he does so. But he tiredly lifts his gaze to Noodle Boy. The Monkie Kid retracts the staff, shrinks it to carriable size, and finally looks down at Red Son.
Red Son coughs out a weak laugh. “Heh heh, nice work, Noodle Boy.”
Monkie Kid doesn’t respond at first, and instead seems to search the fire demon’s eyes. After a somewhat tense moment, he relaxes and gives a small, thankful smile at his former enemy.
Red Son smiles back, more genuinely.
But he quickly becomes worried again as the hero wobbles on his feet and collapses next to him.
“Noodle Boy!” he exclaims. Red Son tries to get up, but finds he’s too hurt and sore to move properly. “Noodle Boy!” he calls again, attempting to reach to him with an outstretched hand to the motionless form next to him. He can’t fully reach him. “MK?” he whispers.
After a terrifying moment of uncertainty, Red Son’s outstretched hand is met halfway with MK’s own, placed gently on top of his. Red Son gives a gasping laugh. MK seems just about as wiped out as he is, if not moreso. But still, a smile spreads on his face as he lightly squeezes Red Son’s hand with his fingers in a gesture of understanding and appreciation. The sentiment means a lot to Red Son, and he softly squeezes back.
Sandy’s blue form enters his vision. His eyebrows are tilted up in concern at first, but his features and hunched shoulders relax greatly when he sees the gentle display in front of him, and from the small smile that Red Son gives him. Red Son is too tired to voice his relief that his caretaker is unharmed, but he gets the feeling that Sandy understands him anyway, just with a look.
The large man leans down and picks up both Red Son and MK, one in each arm. Red Son would normally feel undignified being cradled like a baby, but he’s so tired, and the warmth that comes from his two companions makes him relax. His eyes start to glaze over, and he realizes that he’s drifting off to sleep. He manages to take one last look at the banged up, but healthy and alive crew of the Monkie Kid, at Sandy’s ever exuberant face, and at MK’s now sleeping form, before he falls asleep himself. Injured, but this time feeling safe and at home.
An injury plot works on one very simple three-part platform:
A character gets hurt. (The Beginning)
That character gets treatment and begins to feel better, but must navigate the world in a state of partial disability. (The Middle)
Finally, the character settles into their new normal, whether that’s back to a healthy baseline, living with some partial disability, or suffering a total disability of one body part or another. (The End)
Congratulations! This book is done. Go forth and maim your characters!
If only…
The good news is that sticking to this simple structure will give you a perfectly reasonable injury tale. Observe:
While daydreaming about smashing a homer at the company softball game, Mary trips over the ottoman, falls, and breaks her wrist. She tries icing her wrist, but the pain just keeps getting worse. (The Beginning)
She goes to the ER and gets X-rays and a cast. Thoughts of the game are replaced with daily challenges: how to button her shirts, how to drive her stick shift, how to type her TPS reports at work. She solves these challenges by asking her wife for help with her shirt, swapping cars for a couple of weeks with a coworker who has an automatic, and using dictation software. (The Middle)
Eventually, Mary’s cast comes off. Her wrist still hurts when the weather changes, but mostly she can ignore it. The softball game is all but forgotten. (The End)
This progression certainly works, although it’s a little dull and, most importantly, it lacks meaning. At present, it’s a plot, but not really a story. Remember, Mary needs to change in some fundamental way for it to be a story with meaning (rather than a series of things that happen).
One way we could add some meaning is defining why the softball game is so important to her. Does she need to redeem herself for a mistake? Does she miss the glory days of her youth? Is she trying to impress her boss – or a potential side lover? (Scandal Alert! Or, a perfectly healthy polyamorous relationship.)
In short: this plot is good, or at least makes sense, but now let’s elevate this plot to the level of story.
In my experience, this is where most injury plots fall apart. There’s a very clear cause – a character is injured, usually shot – but there’s no effect on the person or on the story. It becomes simply a piece of texture, an element of “grit” that carries no weight of meaning behind it.
(If texture is something you’re interested in for your story – if you want the injury for the sake of having an injury, not as a mirror to hold up to your character – that’s okay too, as long as the injury is fairly minor. We’ll get to this in Part 8: Sweating the Small Stuff.)
So we’ve taken a look at the Beginning, Middle, andEnd of Mary’s broken wrist plot, and touched on why this might matter to her. All of which is great! But let’s break down those three components into smaller pieces that will help us understand the particular quirks of an injury plot.
There are six distinct phases of the injury portion of the injury plot.
Broken down by plot section, these are:
The Beginning
TheInciting Injury: the moment and manner in which the character gets hurt.
TheImmediate Treatment: what the character does in the moment to feel better and avoid further injury.
The Middle
TheDefinitive Treatment: when the character receives care which ultimately begins their healing process.
TheRocky Road to Recovery: when the character faces challenges relating to their new disability and how they cope with those problems during healing.
The End
TheBig Test: the moment when a character must overcome a greater challenge related to the global plot – while still recovering from their injury.
TheNew Normal: when your character’s final degree of disability becomes apparent. They can have No Disability, a Partial Disability, or be Totally Disabled (for the affected body part).
You can see places where the five fundamental elements of storytelling mesh into the injury plot. The Inciting Injury is the Inciting Incident, the Progressive Complications are in the Treatment stages and the Rocky Road to Recovery, the CrisisandClimax parallel nicely with the Big Test, and the Resolution is one and the same as the New Normal.
So why the relabeling? Because it’s easy to get distracted by vague terms. The labels that are injury-specific will help you remember the pieces you need to have in place in order to make sure your audiences find your arc believable.
Let’s take another look at Mary’s wrist fracture, through the lens of the Six Phases:
Inciting Injury: Mary trips over the ottoman and breaks her wrist.
Immediate Treatment: Mary tries to ice her wrist and hopes it gets better, but it doesn’t.
Definitive Treatment: Mary goes to the ER, gets X-rays and a cast.
The Rocky Road to Recovery: Mary’s everyday life becomes more challenging with her broken wrist! Driving a stick shift is out, she can’t even button her own shirt, and she can’t effectively type one-handed. She solves each of these problems.
Big Test: Mary doesn’t have one… yet.
New Normal: Eventually Mary’s cast comes off, and she has a very minor Partial Disability: some lingering wrist stiffness and some aching when the weather changes.
Hopefully the first three phases are pretty clear and straightforward. But I want to talk about the Rocky Road to Recovery for a little bit, because, at least at the moment, it’s the easiest way to touch on the third rail of the story: why the injury actually matters.
Why is it, exactly, that these three tasks are so important to Mary? Essentially, what parts of herself does this injury force her to face?
Buttoning Her Shirt: As it stands, this is just an inconvenience, one that will go away in a few weeks. But what if Mary is very independent, and hates anyone – even her wife – seeing her vulnerable and weak? Why would she feel this way? Maybe when she was younger, Mary had to take care of her aging grandmother, and she always hated buttoning her grandmother’s blouse. She always vowed that she would never get to that stage in her life – and yet here she is. Maybe she’s coming up on a birthday and fearing her older age.
(Note that these concepts are both very natural and very ablist. On the one hand, change is extremely hard, especially where it concerns things we take for granted, such as our ability to do anything we choose. On the other hand, the mindset that becoming disabled is an awful thing implies that the lives of disabled people are awful, which doesn’t necessarily follow. Be aware of what you’re writing as you write it!)
Swapping Cars: Again, this is an inconvenience – until we know why it’s a big deal for Mary. Is she super proud of her ability to drive a stick shift? Is she super proud of her car as a status symbol – and now she’s swapping her this-year’s Lexus for her coworker’s twelve-year-old Civic? What if she’s a neat freak, and the person she’s switching cars with is a total slob? Or, what if she just got her car – by inheritance, and she has conversations with her car as though it’s her lost parent?
In any of these cases, why does it matter?
Typing and Work: Why does it matter so much that Mary has difficulty typing? Is she on the verge of losing her job – hence her burning desire to impress at the softball game? Is it her dream job she’s at risk of losing, one she’s fought to get? Does she feel like an imposter, like she’s gotten someplace she doesn’t actually deserve, and maybe losing the job is some cosmic retribution for her masquerade? Or maybe she’s self-conscious about her voice (why? An utterly embarrassing failure at a school talent show when she was a teen?), and doesn’t want to use dictation software where other people can hear – but it’s the only way to keep doing her work?
As you can see, this is the single best place where an injury plot can teach us about Mary. With just three relatively small challenges, we learn about her grandmother’s illness, her connection with her lost parent, and her sense of being an imposter at a job she doesn’t deserve (even if she does). All of a sudden, Mary isn’t just a woman who tripped over an ottoman – she’s a person, with a story. Maybe we even feel like we know her. Maybe we identify with these pieces of her we’ve discovered through her struggle.
The magic of storytelling is that if what happens to the character matters to the character, and we know why that is, then what happens will matter to your audience as well.
In the next few sections, we’re going to break down each part of the injury plot more thoroughly, including the way some stories, great and small, have approached them. I’m also going to give you a rough sketch of a story made especially for this book that will illustrate the way each portion of the injury plot might work.
This post is an excerpt from the forthcoming Maim Your Characters, out September 4th, 2017 from Even Keel Press. If you’d like to read a 100-page sample of the book, click here. If you’d like to preorder signed print or digital copies of the book before 9/4/2017, or claim Executive Producer status of the upcoming Blood on the Page, click here.
