#shes tired

I love how we all collectively agree that Bela is the mentally ill dimitrescu.

So… I was playing a one-shot with my friends and we were trying to kill this gorgon with increased hit points. I’m playing a wood elf ranger, and we have a gnome bard and a half orc rogue. Everyone is getting *garbage* rolls including the DM. Nothing but 3’s and 7’s. At this point we’re trying anything, and my friend who’s playing the half-orc rogue made the terrible mistake of asking us what we thought she should do.

Rogue: Guys, what should I do?

A small moment of silence.

Me: Go for double penetration up its ass with your daggers.

Rogue (laughing): Ummm… ok?

Bard (losing his shit): If you get a nat 20…

Rogue gets a nat 20. She then proceeds to rip its asshole apart. She was using 2 daggers and was getting sneak damage, so she rolled 2d6+2d4. She rolled 2 sixes, a two and a four, and then doubled it because of the nat 20. She dealt 36 damage and brought it down to 4 hit points. We go through another round of everyone missing their attacks, but then the rogue rolled an 18, which was enough to hit.

DM: So, how do you want to kill this thing?

The rogue then made a big mistake.

Rogue: Any ideas?

Me: climb inside it and kill it from the inside.

She did exactly that.

Dm: I’m not describing that… it’s dead… everyone roll a constitution saving throw to see if you throw up.

We all failed.

And that was how we saved the village.