#sirius being the best dogfather

Remus: *on the phone* Yes, I-I completely understand and I will definitely talk to Harry. This won’t happen again…Thanks.

Remus: That was Harry’s school calling. Apparently, he has been using some very creative language today.

Sirius: Oh, do tell.

Remus: Well, he called his math homework a “cluster duck” and his teacher a “mother flunker”.

Sirius: Did he not call anyone a “sock sucker”?

Remus:*deadpans*

Sirius: What? It’s just someone who sucks socks.

Remus: I can’t belive you are teaching our Godson loophole swear-words.

Sirius: In my defence, “mother flunker” was entirely the little deviant’s creation, and very cleaver of him, I might add.

Sirius: Well, hello there, what’s this? A swear Jar?

Lily: Oh yes, Harry’s.

Sirius: You give him money everytime he swears? Oh, bravo, Evans. *proceeds to take out his wallet.*

Lily: Oh no, no, no, no. Hepays for every bad word he says.

Sirius: Oh . Well then I am even more impressed.

Lily *shocked*: Oh, thank you, Sirius.

Sirius:Impressed that you would extort money from your own offspring!

Sirius: I mean, what a ridiculous idea! Bad words? Determined by a set of arbitrary rules–just like my father’s.

Sirius: *Gives Harry money* Here, Harry, this should buy you plenty of juice words. You swear away.

Lily: Sirius, No!