Blaise Zabini, everyone.

EVERY SINGLE SLYTHERIN TO THE “SLYTHERIN SUGAR DADDY ” DRACO MALFOY

(just hold out your hand and he’ll hand you no less than 50 galleons, spread the word, spread the love, spread the money )

PANSY TO HERMIONE EVERY SINGLE FREAKING DAY

Daisy claiming the title of “Slytherin Flirt” and making all the witches and wizards fall in love with her.

….except fred weasley.

DRACO TRYING TO MAKE A TIKTOK AND PANSY STRAIGHT UP DESTROYING HIS EGO

FLINTWOOD OPENLY FLIRTING IN FRONT OF THE HOUSE HEADS AND MADAM HOOCH @ THE SLYTHERIN VS. GRYFFINDOR PRE-GAME BRIEFING AND GIVING THEIR TEAMMATES A HUGE HEART ATTACK

BARNEY AND THE BOYS GOING AT IT @ THE SLYTHERIN YEAR-END PARTY

(only 4th years and above from all houses can come)

THAT ONE TIME BARNEY SUBMITTED AN ESSAY DURING A SLYTHERIN PARTY AT THE THREE BROOMSTICKS.

JUST ANOTHER DAY IN THE SLYTHERIN COMMON ROOM

-feat. Pansy and Theo Nott’s chaotic relationship (this was why most of the slytherins were confused but not shocked upon receiving the Wedding Invitation a few years post-war), Barney being the mom who always records everything on his phone and Marcus Flint just wishing Snape doesn’t burst into their common room because of all the noise.

BARNEY BEING THETOP TIERROLE MODEL FOR ALL SLYTHERINS

day 348 of pansy getting flat out rejected by hermione because pansy does not know how to flirt like a normal human without sounding sarcastic

feat. Blaise judging her clown ass

Slytherins once their petition for friday to be a wash day has been approved by Bumblebore

and no they didn’t do it to wash their robes.

Hogwarts Houses as Van Gogh Quotes pt.2

Hufflepuff: “There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.”

Gryffindor: “I would rather die of passion than of boredom.”

Ravenclaw: “Normality is a paved road: it’s comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow on it.”

Slytherin: “Art is to console those who are broken by life.”

Dear Slytherin,

I promise you, one day there will be someone who stumbles into your life. They will see your good and they will see your bad. They will break down the barriers that you’ve worked so hard to build. Then finally, they will choose to stay. You don’t have to shoulder the world alone; lean on people a little.

Sincerely, someone who understands and cares

The Hogwarts Houses on Thanksgiving

Gryffindor: “Lets have a Friendsgiving guys!”

Slytherin and Ravenclaw: “No.”

Hufflepuff: “Aww I think a Friendsgiving would be fun…”

Slytherin: “So do you wanna make the pie?”

Ravenclaw: “Yeah I’m on it.”

Slytherin:

Waits for you- Slytherins always want to be first in whatever group they’re in when on the move, maybe its a pride issue but anyway they walk pretty fast. However if you’re someone they care about and they see you falling behind the group they’ll slow their pace down or even come to a full stop to let you catch up.

Confide in you- Yes this is technically something all people do when they trust a person but its a bit more serious in Slytherin’s case. Slytherins are all about self preservation and basically refusing to look weak. Showing insecure, sad, or unsure thoughts also comes with a lot of vulnerability. If a Slytherin opens up to you, you should really cherish that they trust you so never betray them. If you do betray them, there’s plenty of dirt they have accumulated on you, intentionally or not.

Keep your secrets- Kind of falling in line behind Slytherins confiding in you, if a Slytherin loves you, they will carry your secrets to the grave (unless you do something really bad to them, like betray them) Slytherins have a bad habit for gossip. Its not that they always seek secrets out, sometimes they overhear conversations or some people will just tell them everything, not realizing exactly the possible consequences. However if a Slytherin loves you they would never pass on your secrets to others for fun, advantages, other secrets, or the trust of those other people. Just don’t betray them, that’s one of the worst things you can do to a Slytherin.

Hufflepuff-

Surprises you- It doesn’t always have to be a big surprise like a party or something. Sometimes Hufflepuffs will just show up, drop a little gift in your lap (the majority of the time food) and give you a smile. They truly enjoy doing these things for you because Hufflepuffs know better than anyone that everyone needs a pick me up from time to time. It’s their way of checking on your stress levels as well.

They will defend you- Hear me out. Hufflepuff will always defend anyone who is being targeted unfairly, that’s just their nature. The thing is though, most Hufflepuffs (in my opinion) will do this with a relatively level head. They will seek out the root of the problem and try to solve whatever argument in before them. However when it comes to someone they love being targeted they can show a bit of the Hufflepuff temper that they usually have reigned in. If someone is just genuinely being rude to you and won’t back down, Hufflepuff’s loyal nature takes over and they aren’t afraid to join a yelling match to protect you. It most likely won’t end in anything physical because most people know Hufflepuffs are usually good natured and just the fact that they are angry may tip the instigator of the problem to back off, but Hufflepuffs aren’t afraid of a fist fight. Later they may feel bad about causing you trouble because of their anger, but that’s when the reassurance that they are a good person should kick in for you.

They will comfort you- Hufflepuffs are always low-key worrying about the people they love. So when you come to them late at night with a shaky voice and wavering eyes, they won’t hesitate to scoop you up, find a comfortable place to sit, and hold you while you tell them what the problem is. This house is particularly good at remembering all the little things that calm you down like trailing their nails lightly over your skin or playing with you hair. After you’ve calmed down and explained everything they will spend the time afterwards trying to cheer you up with maybe hot cocoa and a movie.

Ravenclaw-

Will take your criticism- Ravenclaw don’t like to be told they’re wrong. Nothing annoys a Ravenclaw more than unwanted criticism, but if someone they love (*ahem* you) tries to help them learn from their mistakes, they know you truly want what’s best for them.

They let you calm them down- Ravenclaw tend to get anxious and stressed more easily than other houses, in my opinion (except maybe Hufflepuffs). If they go into panic attack mode, they tend to shut down or lash out on the people around them. Its a defensive mechanism that many Ravenclaw acquire because they never want anyone to see them not as their best. But when you comfort them they’re willing to lean into your arms and try to match their uneven breathing to your steady one.

Will ramble to you- Ravenclaws rambling about the things they love to the people to love is my aesthetic. They get a sparkle in their eye and a excited smile. They know you won’t judge them for being slightly nerdy about whatever they want to tell you. When they love you, they instill their trust in you that lets them feel comfortable enough to talk on and on, which can normally be difficult for some Ravenclaws as they can be people of few words. When they do ramble onto you, you’ll get to see one of their softest sides.

Gryffindors-

Will shower you in affection- This can be different for many types of Gryffindors. The stereotypical loud ones will usually become an affectionate fluff ball who tends to cling onto you like a koala. These are the types who will shout complements to hype you up and have absentminded soft smiles when they look at how beautiful you are. Quieter Gryffindors will show their affection in good morning and good night texts or giving you shy complements daily. Their eyes show how in love they are with you.

Looks for you in a crowd- Gryffindors tend to be social people or, even if they’re not, a fair amount of Gryffindor introverts get dragged to social things. You tend to be a touchstone for any type of Gryffindor. In a crowd of people their eyes are scanning for you and they will smile in relief when they find you. It really shows that you are the person they care most about.

They respect you so much- Now don’t get me wrong, all the houses respect their s/o’s but Gryffindor really takes the title for it. Chivalry isn’t dead (for either gender) and they will be the most polite endearing people by opening doors, carrying your things, and protecting you for mean people. They seriously respect you so much and will never take anything to far if you are uncomfortable in any way. Their admiration for you also falls under this category but they seriously admire everything that you do in general: your work ethic, they way you treat people, your beauty. They will never waste your time by showing up late to a date. They will never flirt with anyone else. Gryffindors love with their whole heart and the way they treat you honestly shows it.

Hufflepuff- Morning. When the sun peaks over the horizon and the sky is painted colorful pinks and yellows which fade into peaceful pastels. There’s a cool breeze and dew drops are hanging off of tree leaves and grass. There’s the faintest smell of rain from the night before and your skin feels smooth as you mindlessly kick off your covers to get up and start the day

Gryffindor- Afternoon. The sun beating down after twelve o’clock. Drinking cold beverages as a way to cool down outside. The blacktop parking lots and cement sidewalks are too hot to walk on barefoot so you opt for the grass. Getting tan lines from just playing around outside. Getting a little bit sweaty so you go back inside and sit in front of a fan and speaking into it so your voice is altered

Slytherin- Evening. When the sun is saying goodbye and leaves you with deep purples and reds. The air cools down but laughter and music don’t stop. People whisper their deepest secrets into your ear and sly smirks are exchanged as you sit on your driveway in a circle. The neighborhood cat makes its way out of the bushes to curl up next to you and flick its tail against your leg. You crack open a can of soda and wish that you would never have to leave

Ravenclaw- Night. Sometimes there are clear starry nights when you lay under the stars and pick out all the constellations you know. Sometimes there are thunderstorms with irregular flashes of lightning that draw your attention from the window. Everything is cool now and the only sounds heard are crickets or the occasional passing car. Thoughts of the past, present, and future run through your head as you wonder why you’re not asleep yet

Hogwarts Houses as Van Gogh Quotes

Hufflepuff: “How wonderful the color yellow is. It stands for the sun.”

Ravenclaw: “I don’t know anything with certainty, but seeing the stars makes me dream.”

Gryffindor: “What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?”

Slytherin: “I put my heart and soul into my work, and I have lost my mind in the process.”

Gryffindor: “I’m gonna do the thing.”
Ravenclaw: “Don’t do the thing.”
Slytherin: “Do the thing!”
Hufflepuff: “I’ll get the nurse”