People talk a lot about how reading is necessary for writing, but when you really want to improve your writing, it’s important to go beyond just simple reading. Here are some things to do when reading:
Note how they begin and end the story. There are a ton of rather contradictory pieces of advice about starting stories, so see how they do it in the stories you enjoy. Don’t only look at the most popular stories, but look at your more obscure favorites.
See what strikes you. Is it fast or complicated scenes with a lot of emotions? Is it stark lines? Pithy dialogue? What do you remember the next day?
Pay attention to different styles. It’s not just whether they use past or present tense, first or third person. It’s whether the writing is more neutral or deeper inside character’s heads. Do they use italics? Parentheses? Other interesting stylistic choices? Take the ones you like and try them out in your own writing. See what works and what doesn’t.
Keep track of how they deal with other characters. Do we see a lot of secondary character each for very brief periods of time or are there a couple that show up a lot? How much information do we get about secondary characters? Do they have their own plots or do their plots revolve entirely around the main characters?
Count how many plots there are. Is there just one main plot or are there multiple subplots? Are the storylines mostly plot-based or character-based?
Pay attention to what you don’t like. If you don’t like what’s going on in a book or even just a scene, note what it is. Does the dialogue feel awkward? Are the characters inconsistent? Does the plot feel too convenient or cobbled together? Does the wording just feel off? See if you can spot those issues in your own writing, especially when reading a completed draft or beginning a later draft.
(Great advice! I wanted to tack on other things I look for when reading)
Pay attention to how they introduce characters. Very rarely will it be all at once, and I guarantee the author went over the intro of each major character again and again while editing, so I always like paying extra close attention! Did the intro endear you to the character? Make you dislike them? How did the author impart that emotion?
Note instances of worldbuilding/info dumps, especially parts that don’t seem like worldbuilding/info dumps. Maybe the character mentions something offhand about a location you’ll see five chapters later. Maybe the internal dialogue makes a comparison to the character’s childhood. Was the information effective or did it leave you wanting more? Make note of anything that made you go, “ooh, neat!”
After you finish the story, try to find foreshadowing that you missed the first time through! It can be as simple as skimming and looking for phrases you know are important after finishing the story. Most authors add foreshadowing in the editing stage, so I tend to ponder how the story would read before they added it. Ninety-nine percent of the time, the story seems more magical for it and it’s just nice to appreciate.
What plot structures could the story fit into? We all know about the three arc stories, hero’s journey, etc. Sometimes stories can fit into more than one category. During the read and after, keep it in the back of your mind. Can you predict where the climax of the story will hit? Is it man v man or man v nature? Does the predictability (or lack thereof) add to or take away from the story?
Caring for natural (curly) hair in a setting with no access to modern hair products
So it’s the apocalypse. Your curly-haired character is on the run. They find themselves on an adventure in a fantasy world. It’s a castaway story. Or the whatever-eth century and they’re in an environment that doesn’t exactly accommodate curly, coily haired types.
Either way, manufactured hair products are far and few between, or they’re simply not made for afro hair. Considering how your Black character handles their hair in this environment makes their circumstances more realistic and relatable.
Topics Featured in this Guide:
Hair Products found in Natural Environment
Hair Oils - Benefits and How To Extract
Protective Hair Techniques & Styles
Curly Hair Types & Hair Needs
Hair Routine Samples
Hair Straightening
FAQ
There is a writing takeaway at the end of each topic.
Brief descriptions provided after images. Contact me for fully accessible version.
Hair Products found in Natural Environment
Consider the essential needs of afro hair: water and fat.
Water(or liquid) is essential for nourishing the hair.
Fat(hair oils, creams, butters) is essential for both growth and protection.
Many curly-haired folks already use natural resources and plants to care for their hair - aka DIY hair-care. So characters concocting their own products should not be a strange concept. (I personally buy most of my natural hair products, and create my own hair masks, protein treatments, and oil blends.)
What they could use would depend on environment, time, and availability.
Hair Healthy Produce
Coconut- The all-purpose hair aid with multi forms, from oil to solid cream. Hardens in cold weather; best not to use when environment has freezing temps. Banana - Typically removed after use (hair masks, conditioners) Avocado - Applied as hair products, masks, and oils. Strawberry - Mashed and applied directly to hair or mixed with oils.
Hair Healthy Proteins, Plants, Fats
Eggs - Hardens when dry. Strong odor. Removed after use. (protein masks) Honey - Pulls moisture from air into hair - avoid during the dry winter! Shea Nuts - Made into shea butter. All-purpose hair and body care. Flaxseed -Gel made by boiling & straining flax seeds. Many DIY videos online.
Hair Healthy Herbs and Flora
Hibiscus- Sebaceous = oil-producing gland. Flowers crushed into paste or oil. Peppermint- Can rub out oil from leaves. Often used in oil form on scalp. Lavender - Often used as an oil directly applied to the scalp, or brewed as tea. Rosemary - Often combined with olive oil in use with hair; can be used alone.
More Hair Healthy Herbs and Flora
Aloe Vera - Succulent. Can extract sap directly from leaf and apply like gel. Burdock - Contains essential fatty acids and phytosterol compounds. Dandelion - Can use the roots, stems, leaves and sap for hair and skin. Rose - Common use is rose water: steep roses in boiling water to create.
Hair Healthy Products (rare or require effort to make/find)
Apple Cider Vinegar (ACV)- Diluted before use and often washed out after. Bentonite Clay - Aged volcanic ash. Combined with ACV for best activation. Oils - Key component for sealing moisture. See the next discussion. Yogurt - Base of many DIY hair products like masks and deep conditioners.
Oils for Hair
Oil is a key component to afro hair care. It nourishes and seals in moisture. Let’s discuss common hair oils and extraction methods that could, more likely, be done using homemade or historical equipment.
Oil Extraction
If oils aren’t readily available to purchase, the person would need to find or create tools to either extract the oil via pressing or heat the nuts or seeds. Consider the basic tools that have been around since ancient times. For example, the mortar and pestle. What creative use can be made out of existing tools in the person’s environment?
Hair Oils and Benefits (by potential ease to extract.)
FYI:These aren’t the only methods or necessarily professional means of extraction. I also left off hair-healthy oils that seemed complicated to extract without high-grade equipment. So, this isn’t an all-inclusive list of oil or methods.
Natural Hair Product Creation
So what exactly would your character create? Here’s some natural hair products and potential main ingredients. May be used alone or combined.
Leave-in moisturizers: Plain water, coconut water, rose water
DIY Recipe Search: Try keywords like “DIY natural hair” + “curly hair” “Afro hair” or search all natural hair products and read over the ingredient list. Try small home business and independent sellers (Like etsy)
Most homemade products last everywhere from a few days - weeks
Extend the life of spoil-prone products via the cooling system in the work.
Honey does not spoil. Be mindful if it’s mixed with spoil-prone ingredients.
Oils can usually be kept at room temperature and last a long time.
Keeping a small bit of ready made supply may prove time-efficient. If impossible, they may opt to use products that don’t require much time and effort, and are worth their time to make in small batches or to potentially dispose of after.
Writing Takeaway - Natural Product/Oils Creation
With just the above compounds, I can see creative naturals being able to create styling products and moisturizing leave-ins, shampoos, conditioners and hair masks.
Do consider the following:
How simple or complex can their regimen be?
Would they rely more on protective hair styles in their situation?
What is the natural environment: what products are accessible?
How will they store products or must they make a new batch each use?
Can items be purchased by craftsmen or found in abandoned locations?
Can they afford to use edible plants if food is scarce? Food scraps and non-edible plants (like the flora) might be what they rely on.
What are their specific hair care needs? -Discussion on this later-
Natural Hair and Styling
LOC Method as base style
Moisture, sealing in the moisture, and protection are the basic needs for natural hair. The Liquid, Oil, and Cream (LOC) Method, or a variation of the steps, fulfills those basic needs. It can be treated as both a care routine and a style in itself. Personally, if my hair is not in a protective style, I use it every week.
Liquid - Liquid opens hair cuticles to allow moisture to enter hair strands.
Oil - Once cuticles are opened, the oil penetrates hair & seals in moisture.
Cream - Cream further locks in the moisture, and can be used as a styling agent as well to shape and define curls.
Should you use the “LOC method” by name in your work?
A modern setting? Sure. But don’t assume readers know what it means.
A fantasy setting? Probably not, unless earth and its terms carry over.
Protective hairstyles protect the hair by tucking ends away from the elements. For example, heat, air, hand and fabric manipulation. While not forever solutions (except maybe locs which are a permanent style) there’s many benefits to your character’s wearing them.
Benefits:
Hair growth retention
Saves time styling hair
Helps prevent damage and keep hair healthy
Ideal for any natural (the best style itself may depend on hair type)
Lessens hair’s need and dependence on moisture and hair products
Eliminates some hair maintenance activities (such as detangling)
Considerations:
Hair more difficult to wash and dry thoroughly.
Dryness (unable to access all tucked away hair to moisturize)
Styles kept in too long accumulates dead skin and product build up.
Uninstalling styles can be time consuming, and should be done gently.
Style gets frizzy from growth overtime and/or getting soaked in water.
Protective Styles Short-term (lasting days to weeks)
Afro puff(s) or bun(s)
Back Tuck or Roll and Tuck
Bantu knots
French roll
Pompadour
Roller set
Two-strand twists
Wash and go (low manipulation style)
Shaved(lower maintenance, but not an overnight decision)
Protective Styles Long-term (lasting weeks to months+)
Braids(endless styles and patterns. Typically smaller braids last longer)
Cornrows
Dreadlocks/locs(permanent style, research the hair care)
Extensions
Flat Twists /Twists
Head wraps and hats (endless wrapping styles, colors and patterns!)
Wigs(unless glued, hair maintained underneath or often put in braids)
Writing Takeaway - Protective Hairstyles
Protective styles are an amazing way to protect the character’s hair and would very likely be the go-to for any natural in an uncertain or fast-paced environment. Just in everyday life they’re highly worn so it would especially be the case! Just remember the character needs to eventually undo whatever protective style they have installed to do some hair maintenance (washing, detangling, etc) and give their strands a rest. Also, even hair in protective styles need some attention.
Curly Hair Type and Associated Needs
Determining your hair type is important to knowing its needs. Certain ingredients work best for certain hair types. However everyone is unique and there are more factors to consider than just curl pattern (Also, most curly folks cross into a mix of hair types). There is hair thickness (width&density) and how much moisture and product your hair absorbs (porosity) to consider as well.
I will only cover curl pattern and the commonly associated needs here. To learn more about porosity, width, and density check out the FAQ under the read more.
naturallycurly.com is a great resource and is the source for the images, terms, and information provided below.
Curly Twirly (3A)
Defined loopy “S” pattern. Curls well defined and springy. Big, loose and shiny. Size: Sidewalk chalk size. Best Products: Gels and creams with light moisture and curl definition.
Curly Spirally (3B)
Well-defined, springy copious curls that range from bouncy ringlets to tight corkscrews. Size:Sharpie size. Best Products: Gels and styling creams with extra moisture and frizz control.
Curly Kinky (3C)
Voluminous, tight corkscrew curls. Either kinky or very tightly curled, with lots of strands densely packed together. The very tight curls are usually fine in texture. Size:Pencil. Best Products: Styling creams, butters, and oils. Needs gentle care.
Coily Springy (4A)
Well-defined “S” Pattern. Tight, coily, and the most fragile curls. Size:Crochet Needle or smaller.
4A Best Products & Tips: Styling creams, butters, and oils.
Clarify scalp with tea tree or jojoba oil during washes
This hair needs extra moisture and tender care
Be gentle when handling and detangling hair to avoid stress & breakage
Use thick moisturizers like mango and shea butters to maximize styles
While hair type is just the start of all the intricacies of natural hair needs, it’s definitely agood start. There are other important parts to consider for real life naturals, but going off from hair type and the commonly associated needs should be enough for a story. (But read the FAQ under the read more to keep learning)
Do not get lost in the details, especially for a story that won’t need to cover tons of it. Learn enough to know what you’re talking about and can describe hair care accurately for situations that would affect hair.
Writing Takeaway - Overall:
You don’t have to be lavish in detail, but acknowledging how hair is handled here and there or in a dedicated section is thoughtful and satisfying to see included. It’s also a neutral way to show race without the use of micro-aggressions or racism. Finding the time and means for proper hair care would be a part of their life and potentially a stumbling block on the adventure, so mentioning how hair is handled during these circumstances is a fine idea.
It’s also a great means for representation.
–Mod Colette
Additional Info:
The following information will be nestled under the read more:
Hair Routine Samples - One super simple and one complex hair routine
Hair Straightening - Not ideal to maintain in survival situations, but also was a means of survival and daily living during some historical contexts
FAQ - Would any of this matter during the apocalypse? And what about natural products that attract bugs? Plus more.
I think the best piece of character design advice I ever received was actually from a band leadership camp I attended in june of 2017.
the speaker there gave lots of advice for leaders—obviously, it was a leadership camp—but his saying about personality flaws struck me as useful for writers too.
he said to us all “your curses are your blessings and your blessings are your curses” and went on to explain how because he was such a great speaker, it made him a terrible listener. he could give speeches for hours on end and inspire thousands of people, but as soon as someone wanted to talk to him one on one or vent to him, he struggled with it.
he had us write down our greatest weakness and relate it to our biggest strength (mine being that I am far too emotional, but I’m gentle with others because I can understand their emotions), and the whole time people are sharing theirs, my mind was running wild with all my characters and their flaws.
previously, I had added flaws as an after thought, as in “this character seems too perfect. how can I make them not-like-that?” but that’s not how people or personalities work. for every human alive, their flaws and their strengths are directly related to each other. you can’t have one without the other.
is your character strong-willed? that can easily turn into stubbornness. is your character compassionate? maybe they give too many chances. are they loyal? then they’ll destroy the world for the people they love.
it works the other way around too: maybe your villain only hates the protagonist’s people because they love their own and just have a twisted sense of how to protect them. maybe your antagonist is arrogant, but they’ll be confident in everything they do.
tl;dr “your curses are your blessings, and your blessings are your curses” there is no such thing as a character flaw, just a strength that has been stretched too far.
Hey everyone, Abby here with another advice post! Today I’m talking about motivations and how to make them unique to each character.
What is character motivation and why is it important?
What motivated you to get out of bed this morning? What’s motivating you to read right now?
Even if it isn’t immediately apparent, everything you do has a motivation behind it, big or small. Maybe you got out of bed this morning to turn your alarm off, or maybe because you have an ultra-important job interview happening today that you can’t be late for.
Character motivation is important because your characters have to have a reason to be doing what they’re doing. Even if it’s just because they feel like it - why do they just feel like it? If your character is going on a journey for literally no reason, there’s no reason for them not to be laying on their bed staring at the ceiling instead. If they’re doing it to rescue someone, to see the world, to pay a debt, they have a reason, and their journey has an understandable purpose.
In essence, motivation answers the age-old question of “why.”
Simple Motivation
Simple character motivation is this: your character wants or needs something, and they are motivated to fulfill that want or need. If they’re hungry, they’re going to eat. If they want they’ll ask someone for a hug or drop hints that they want a hug until someone complies. They’ll do their thing.
A simple character motivation is determined by one will. Your character has a drive to do one thing, and they will do that one thing.
Complex Motivation
Complex motivation is where it gets interesting, where we really see the dimension to your characters. Simple motivation is determined by a will. Complex motivation is determined by a will and at least one counterwill, when your character is pulled in multiple directions and they’re trying to satisfy everything.
Think of it with this situation: Character A’s S.O. cheated on them.
If A’s simple motivation was to be respected, this occurrence would be a sign of disrespect and would more than likely result in them leaving their S.O.
However, if A has a complex motivation, things get complicated. They want to be respected, but they also want to feel loved and supported in a way that perhaps they believe only their S.O. can. Because of these two conflicting interests, what we interpret as a simple decision has a lot more riding on it. Whether or not A decides to leave their S.O., they’re failing to fulfill one of their motivations. A complex motivation like this adds character dimension because we see how A prioritizes what they want in a relationship and what they’re willing to sacrifice or compromise at this level. Whether or not it’s something you as an author (or reader) necessarily agree with, we see depth.
How do we know what motivates our characters?
This question should be one of the first few that you answer when developing each of your characters. What qualities or ideas do they hold to the highest level in everyday life? We’ll stick with the simple motivation of being respected that we used before.
Great! We have a simple motivation. Now: take something your character cares about, and use it to challenge that simple motivation. They want to be respected, and something (that matters to them) makes them feel that they’ve been disrespected. What is their motivation in regard to this thing that happened, and does it challenge their simple motivation?
We see characters at their most engaging when they’re being pulled in what feels like a million different directions, forced to choose between things that matter to them. This is why we so heavily emphasis character motivation.
The question I get the most is how I write characters that feel like real people.
Generally when I’m designing a human being, I deconstruct them into 7 major categories:
1. Primary Drive 2. Fear: Major and Secondary 3. Physical Desires 4. Style of self expression 5. How they express affection 6. What controls them (what they are weak for) 7. What part of them will change.
1. Primary Drive: This is generally related to the plot. What are their plot related goals? How are they pulling the plot forward? how do they make decisions? What do they think they’re doing and how do they justify doing it.
2. Fear: First, what is their deep fear? Abandonment? being consumed by power? etc. Second: tiny fears. Spiders. someone licking their neck. Small things that bother them. At least 4.
3.Physical desires. How they feel about touch. What is their perceived sexual/romantic orientation. Do their physical desires match up with their psychological desires.
4. Style of self expression: How they talk. Are they shy? Do they like to joke around and if so, how? Are they anxious or confident internally and how do they express that externally. What do words mean to them? More or less than actions? Does their socioeconomic background affect the way they present themselves socially?
5. How they express affection: Do they express affection through actions or words. Is expressing affection easy for them or not. How quickly do they open up to someone they like. Does their affection match up with their physical desires. how does the way they show their friends that they love them differ from how they show a potential love interest that they love them. is affection something they struggle with?
6. What controls them (what they are weak for): what are they almost entirely helpless against. What is something that influences them regardless of their own moral code. What– if driven to the end of the wire— would they rejectsacrificing. What/who would they cut off their own finger for. What would they kill for, if pushed. What makes them want to curl up and never go outside again from pain. What makes them sink to their knees from weakness or relief. What would make them weep tears of joy regardless where they were and who they were in front of.
7.WHAT PART OF THEM WILL CHANGE: people develop over time. At least two of the above six categories will be altered by the storyline–either to an extreme or whittled down to nothing. When a person experiences trauma, their primary fear may change, or how they express affection may change, etc. By the time your book is over, they should have developed. And its important to decide which parts of them will be the ones that slowly get altered so you can work on monitoring it as you write. making it congruent with the plot instead of just a reaction to the plot.
That’s it.
But most of all, you have to treat this like you’re developing a human being. Not a “character” a living breathing person. When you talk, you use their voice. If you want them to say something and it doesn’t seem like (based on the seven characteristics above) that they would say it, what would they say instead?
If they must do something that’s forced by the plot, that they wouldn’t do based on their seven options, they can still do the thing, but how would they feel internally about doing it?
How do their seven characteristics meet/ meld with someone else’s seven and how will they change each other?
Once you can come up with all the answers to all of these questions, you begin to know your character like you’d know one of your friends. When you can place them in any AU and know how they would react.
They start to breathe.
This is an excellent resource (that I will now be using) for not only writing original character but fanfiction, too. Getting the characters right is always a little tricky especially if it’s something you haven’t experienced/written yet or if it’s just a tough character to work with and write properly.
If you’re having trouble developing a character for one of your stories, here’s an idea that may help you. Create a Pinterest board for that character and pin the following things:
Things they would like
Food they would eat
Clothes they would wear
Places they like to go
Places they dream of going
Elements of their culture
Elements of their religion (if they have one)
Where they live
Color palettes that fit them
Their aesthetic
Quotes that relate to them
Seeing all of these things together in the same board may help you visualize the character more.
character development, characterization, unnecessary characters
point-of-view consistency, showing vs telling, voice
motivation, goals, conflict, tension, tone
back story, plot holes, loose story threads
scene order, flow, and pace
2. Line Edit
This step zooms into the paragraph and sentence level of the story. The intention here is to tighten up and smooth out the writing, and iron out any style issues. Things that will be looked at include:
sentence structure, wordiness, paragraph flow
word choice, word repetition, overused words
clichés (the phrase kind, not the concept kind)
weak transitions, overall clarity
3. Copy Edit
This step is about clean-up and consistency. It’s the phase where a fine polish is buffed into the surface of the story. No major edits will occur from this point onward. Things that will be looked at include:
grammar and punctuation
use of active voice over passive voice
continuity and overall cohesiveness
4. Proofread
The goal of this step is to look one last time for errors and things that need to be changed. Things that will be looked at include:
typos
overlooked errors in grammar, punctuation, and capitalization
5. Formatting
If your book is being traditionally published, you only need to worry about putting your manuscript into the format preferred by the agent or publisher you’re sending it to. If you’re self-publishing, this stage is a little bit trickier, because e-books and print books require slightly different formatting. There are guides online for how to do it, or you can pay someone to format your book for you. Just do your homework to make sure you’re choosing a good service. There’s also software that will help you format your book, or you can look into services like Pressbooks.
Alternatives For “Said” Organized By Emotion: Minimal Edition
Curated personally by me, straight from my excel doc where I combined several lists I found online ANDduplicated words in multiple columns when the word versatile enough for several emotions, something irritated me on other lists. Like, come on Rebecca, “mumbled” can be used with almost every single mood, why are you only sticking it under “sad”?
some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.
I couldn’t remember the word “doorknob” ten minutes ago.
ok but the onelook thesaurus will save your life, i literally could not live without this website
I’m look for writing prompts for something I’m planning in the future. This can be anything whether it’s a line of dialog, an action or a scenario. Hell, even a random object or word. It can be for any genera, any time period, any country. It can be angst or fluff, romance or fighting, smutty goodness or nightmare enduring. I want anything and everything.
I’m primarily a fanfic writer and that’s mostly my hero academia with my main pair being Bakugou x fem!reader x Todoroki but I also write stuff for the Witcher tv series (Geralt x Jaskier) and most recently shadowhunters (Jace x Simon). So please hit me up with specific prompts for these or even throw me some curveballs.
Send it as an ask or message me or even leave it as a comment thread on the post. I’m looking for a challenge so don’t hesitate to throw me something outside of my comfort zone.
A concept is an abstract idea or a general notion, so this guide does not cover all the specifics that a character may or may not need. It does, however, give a basic start to help organize characters early on in a story without boxing them in too tightly. If too many characters are too rigid at the start of a story, then you risk losing out on better ideas or restrict your story’s potential growth. There are good reasons Why You Should Avoid Knowing Your Characters Too Well, but it’s always smart to still have a plan! Just stay flexible!
This guide is only for a basic concept and should be expanded by the writer for any specifics that a story may need.
Name: _______________
Do they go by a nickname?
Do they have any past names or aliases that they once used?
Age: _______________
Do they look their age?
Gender: _______________
Occupation: _______________
How do they feel about their occupation?
Goal(s): _______________
How does it/they relate to the plot?
Physical appearance: _______________
Hair color and texture, skin color and tone, defining features, makeup and/or hair style, etc.
Does their physical appearance reflect their personality, or parts of it?
Keep a record of character description throughout the story to avoid contradiction.
This should be only noted in the level of detail that’s relevant to the story. It may be more appropriate to list a general body type or a few descriptors that you plan to use, rather than worry about specific numbers.
Basic personality: _______________
How does personality affect their speech patterns? Include quotes from the story as examples.
What is the difference between their external and internal personalities? For example, a character may have an inclination to be rude that could be seen in the way they think (internal), but they may project a friendlier personality because they want to work on being kinder (external).
Are there any large influences to their personality? For example, someone may be shy around strangers but the life of a party with friends.
Relationships: _______________
Rank their relationships from most favored person to least, only noting the people who would matter for the story. It’s okay to have relative rank groups instead of exact numbers.
What do they think/feel about each person?
At what point do they consider someone to be a friend? Close friend?
Keep a record of how relationships change through the story.
Background: _______________
How does their background affect who they are in the story?
Keep a record of all information given about backstory to avoid contradiction.
Strengths: _______________
How do they play into the story and affect the plot?
Weaknesses: _______________
How do they play into the story and affect the plot?
Some extra questions to think about, particularly if the character has important story focus, but aren’t necessary for all characters. Some of the questions may be applicable to certain side characters anyway. (Feel free to add your own for your specific story!):
How does that character feel about their age/weight/height/physical appearance?
What is the character’s sexual and/or romantic preference?
Does the character care about labels (for sexuality, gender, etc.), and if specific labels come up, which ones will the story use?
What would the character lie about and why?
At what point, or during what occurrence, would they stand up for a stranger in a public setting and why?
What is their worst fear(s)?
How adaptable are they to change?
What would it take for them to feel loved and accepted?
Do they have a plan for tomorrow? Next week? Next year?
Do they care about what other people think of them, and if so, then to what extent?
How do they feel about their parents/guardians and why?
** Note that the guide should only be filled out in relation to the character’s role, and information should not be forced onto the guide or to appear in the story itself.
Thinking of asking a question? Please read the Rules and Considerationsto make sure I’m the right resource, and check the Tag List to see if your question has already been asked.
Author and doctor of clinical psychology Carolyn Kaufman has released a one-page body language cheat sheet of psychological “tells” (PDF link) fiction writers can use to dress their characters.
Okay so one of the many things that drives me absolutely nuts about most TV shows and (some) books that involve secret or classified information or secure facilities is how absolutely not secure everything is, so these are a few basic things that people get wrong:
You can’t carry around classified information. There are, I assume, exceptions in specific cases, though they are assuredly very carefully managed, but random intel agent #12 cannot legally just take home classified information so they can work on it at home. That’s incredibly illegal. And that’s for a reason–secure facilities are, as the name suggests, secure. Everywhere else is varying levels of not secure. Even for people working with regular business or government materials on their work phone or laptop, there are varying levels of strict rules about where you can leave it, how to report a lost device, and not keeping it in checked bags.
Badges should be innocuous and limited in visible information. Any sensible security system doesn’t have badges that are numbered/colored/otherwise identified by access level, because that is a really easy way to identify targets for thieves/people who want to break in. American federal ID cards (CACfor military, PIVfor civilian) have really specific layouts. Some companies distinguish between full time employees, interns, vendors, etc in their cards.
Badges shouldn’t be displayed outside of the office. This is not really followed by real people (if you get on the metro on DC you will see a wide variety of visible badges), but displaying a badge is not security-wise because 1) it makes them easier to steal, and 2) it can make you a target.
Names/access level/information shouldn’t be openly announced. I’m looking at you, MCU Spider-Man fanfiction. Just. Don’t.
Confidential/classified information shouldn’t be openly discussed. Stop having your characters talk about confidential or classified information in front of people who shouldn’t know it, or even just out in the open at all. They shouldn’t be telling their parents, their friends, their spouses, etc. Even businesses or government buildings that deal with sensitive information, there may be spaces where certain things can or can’t be discussed, and employees/contractors will go through approximately 8 million trainings on where you can’t discuss certain information. This also involves erasing whiteboards, locking computers, etc.
You can’t have cell phones in certain secure facilities. People shouldn’t be having their cell phones with them in SCIFs. This prohibition extends to all things that can be recording devices, including furbies.
I live in an army town that has a lot of military intelligence and electronic warfare development stuff going on. The end result of this is that I’ve known a lot of people who deal with classified stuff in some nature. This means that I’ve had a lot of experiences of watching TV with someone, only for them to pause and start ranting about this kind of thing, as well as just kind of living in this environment with these people.
So, I have some further things to mention (keeping in mind that this is coming from someone on the outside)!
I have occasionally asked someone a question (about current events, technology, or something along those lines) and been told, “I can’t talk about that. I don’t think it’s classified, but it’s something I heard in a room with classified information.”
If someone works in one of these jobs, they will occasionally lie to every single one of their friends and family members. This doesn’t generally bother those friends and family members. Assuming that the nature of their job isn’t classified in and of itself (like claiming to work at a department store when you actually work for the CIA), you just kind of accept it. Sometimes you realize that you’re being lied to, but I suspect most of the time you don’t. But if someone goes on a work trip to a place that’s allegedly a three-hour plane ride away and doesn’t call to tell you they’ve arrived until ten hours later, and then only calls you at 10pm in the time zone they’re allegedly in… maybe there’s something going on that you’re not aware of, and maybe you keep your mouth shut about it.
On a practical note (and due to many rants from someone I know), no one is going to drop a classified file and have stuff come spilling out. When they are transported, they are kept wrapped up in multiple layers. This not only keeps someone from dropping it and allowing any passersby to read what’s on those papers, but it also acts as a tamper-proof seal. If someone receives a file with torn packaging, you know something’s up.
Another thing I know, courtesy of a rant from someone who accidentally did this: duress codes and keypads! If you have a location that requires a coded entry, first of all you cannot do a cool trick with a mirror to see what the code is while someone else puts it in. You cannot see it on the camera. IIRC, you will likely stick your hand in a little opaque box to put in the code because the people who design these things are not idiots. Secondly, you will have a duress code. This code will likely still give you access to the room/building/whatever, but it will alert security that you are doing so under duress. This may be by putting in the actual code backwards, or by using a previous code, or something else entirely. In this case, be sure to keep track of which codes are which, so that you don’t leave the lab on a regular day of work to find the hall lined with very concerned (and very armed) security personnel prepared to shoot whoever “forced you to let them in the room” (this story is definitely based on a true story, and we still mock him for it).
Secure locations are more secure than you think. The previous post mentions things like cell phones and furbies (and yes, everyone in town laughs about the furby thing), but this extends to a lot of other security measures. For example, cable management. In secure computer labs, there are likely to be extensive rules about how close cables can run to each other. You need to know exactly what is doing what, and it needs to be clear that nothing else is there. A mess of cables could easily hide something that’s not supposed to be there.
For the love of God, learn what a closed network is. If you have a bunch of classified materials that do not actively need to be shared, you cannot hack in from the outside to get access to them. Those computers are not connected to anything outside of that room or facility. Also, if you have a mystery thumbdrive you do not plug it into your network, holy shit what is wrong with you, this is what non-networked devices are for you idiot. There are plenty of computers on hand that completely lack the hardware necessary to connect to another in any way, shape, or form. Your virus can’t turn on the computer’s wi-fi to send information to you because there is nothing to turn on.
There are a lot of security measures. A lab may have things like thermite grenades on hand. In the event that you need to destroy everything inside, you put the grenade on top of a file cabinet and set it off. It won’t explode, it’ll just melt through the file cabinet, setting everything inside on fire. And yes, that sounds super badass and I kind of want to see this happen.
Sometimes a person with this kind of clearance is just going to go silent. It may be when you’re watching the news, discussing current events, or when you’re talking about a cool article you just read about some new developments in technology, but it’ll happen. If they’re good at it, you won’t notice. If they’re not, you’ll smile to yourself and keep your mouth shut.
Also I’ve kind of touched on this, but this is not going to be strange to the people around the person with clearance. The things that I’ve described here are pretty mundane when this is a part of your life. You may joke about it with other people (a friend and I will laugh about her dad’s late night calls that are followed by “I’m leaving town. I’ll be back eventually.”), but this isn’t odd to you. It’s like joking about any other aspect of someone’s job, like a weird fast food uniform or an eccentric boss.
Kind of connected, but no one who’s been married to someone in one of these jobs for any decent amount of time is going to be mad that their spouse is “keeping secrets” and the next time I see this trope in media I’m going to punch someone. Keeping secrets is literally part of their job and you know that. They will keep those secrets or they will go to jail, and you do not want your loved ones in jail. Depending on the nature of their job, you may worry about them, but you will not be mad at them for not telling you every detail of their day at work. If this kind of thing is a problem, it will be a problem from the start and is just generally a sign of incompatibility.
And finally, and most importantly:
When doing chair races in the halls, you need a spotter at the end of the hall to alert you when a colonel is approaching so that you can look like serious people who can definitely be trusted with classified information
A bit more information from an infosec perspective, including some stuff you might be able to use:
The cable placement thing? It’s because cables are antennae, basically.. Any time you power a circuit, it gives off a small radio emission; if you have a secure and an insecure data line next to each other, they can interfere in such a way that you can recover the secure data from the insecure line. Similarly, the wrong cable geometry can boost the signal like a well-shaped antenna, making it detectable from further away.
Because of the above, if you have a good software-defined radio antenna, the right software, and a highly predictable signal (such as, say, the draw/refresh cycle of a monitor), you can listen in to an insecure machine from a surprising distance. (It’s called Van Eck phreaking.)
On a related note, if you know enough about the technical details of a CPU, you can reconstruct what it’s doing by listening to the shifts in how much power it draws. Tailored access batteries exist that are designed to do this for specific cell phone and laptop types and transmit the data with a built-in antenna.
That bit about how your virus can’t turn on the wi-fi in a machine with no network hardware? That’s, uh. Technically true, but it can do GSM and LTE just fine. By playing with the principles I’ve mentioned above, it’s possible to screw with your RAM in such a way that it acts as an extremely small cell tower. (For a real world example, look into GSMem.)
All I’m saying is, if a fic refers to characters by their physical attributes instead of their names or pronouns (“he smiled at the older” “the blonde laughed”) when we know who the character is, and ESPECIALLY if the descriptions include “ravenette” or “cyanette” or other ridiculous words–
I’m clicking out of that fic so fast my AO3 history won’t even register I’ve been there.
I am glad you asked. :D
First, if a writer is using the characters’ names every sentence – they’re already off to a bad start. Not every sentence needs to clarify which character it applies to, unless you’re writing a “See Jane Run” book, lol.
Overall a good rule of thumb is a) don’t repeat unnecessary information, and b) only write things that carry the scene.
So for starters, your readers should know who’s in the scene, and you can trust them to have at least a little bit of intuition: not every bit of dialog needs to have a tag (“he said/she whispered” etc.) Now, that established: you do use names when doing otherwise would leave it unclear who’s doing or saying things. Example:
George grabbed the lid off the pot. “Dang, that’s hot!”
Laughing, Sean passed him a bowl. “Just pour the soup, moron.”
“You’re a moron.”
“Says the guy who just grabbed the lid off a boiling pot.”
Sticking his tongue out, George filled the first bowl.
It’s clear who says what, and if we had just used “he” it wouldn’t have been, but we also didn’t have to dialog-tag every line. (ALSO. “Said” is not a bad word. Ignore all advice that tells you never to use “said.” “Said” is an invisible word and unless you’re putting a dialog tag on every line [which you Do Not Need To Do] people won’t even notice it. Unlike “shrieked,” “whispered,” “hissed,” “ranted,” “whined,” etc. Use those words when they’ll have punch and impact. Not every dang line.)
But this isn’t always how it needs to go.
For example. Let’s say I’m writing about a strawberry-blonde elf named Diana and a human bard with black hair named Jerome. I could say:
Diana leaped to her feet, looking excitedly at the ravenette. “Jerome!” Diane said. “This is our chance!”
Jerome smiled at the strawberry-blonde. “Indeed,” he replied.
Okay there are…. several issues here. First off, we don’t need to clarify that Diana said the thing after we had her doing an action. Trust your readers! They’ll know that a “she” here logically refers to Diane, as they know that “he replied” refers to Jerome.
Next, please strike “referring to characters by eye or hair color” from any lists. This is not good. It’s not relevant 99% of the time (we’ll get to exceptions in a moment) and also, pet peeve: “ravenette” does not mean black-haired. If you’ve gottasay it, just say black-haired. Ravenette means “a raven, diminuative” or maaaaaaybe “like a raven.” Unless you’re imitating an 1800s gothic poet, don’t do this.
Physical descriptions used as character indicators/pseudo pronouns are clunky and take up space without telling us anything new. They distance the reader from the character by taking us out of the story and back into exposition land, and they generally repeat information we already know. We can tell our readers in chapter one that Diana has strawberry-blonde hair, and then we don’t need to refer to her as “the strawberry-blonde” a hundred more times because our readers already know this. Just call her Diana. Or “she.” (Unless it’s relevant to the moment – if she’s not our POV character and we need to contrast her to, say, a black-haired beauty at the ball through someone else’s eyes, that’s one thing. But still, don’t continually refer to her by something as shallow as her hair color.)
Exception:visual descriptions are valid to use as character-indicators when we or the characters do not know who that person is. For example, if Diana had been kidnapped by bandits.
She glared at the taller of the two men, who appeared to be some kind of leader. “What do you want?” she spat.
He leered at her, and nudged the filthy blond man at his side. “Ain’t she cute,” he said. “I like elves. All feisty, they are.”
The blond looked uncomfortable. “Whatever you say, Gorm.”
Ooooh look! Now we know the boss-man’s name. From here on out, we probably should refer to him as either “Gorm” or “the bandit leader” – not “the tall man” (and never just “the taller.” Or “the older,” “the younger,” etc. That’s a side note, but a lot of fics do that too. If you’re going to use a comparative adjective, you at least still have to tell us what noun it refers to.)
Also – did you notice how we never said Diana’s name there either? She’s the viewpoint character, so unless another person comes along that we need to clarify with, we can usually get away with just saying “she.” The reader knows who they’re reading about.
When you DO have two or more characters with the same pronouns in a scene, you gotta get creative. Again, readers are intuitive – they can follow pretty well who’s doing what as long as you make it clear. Generally speaking, if you establish which character is doing the thing, you can then use just the pronoun until you switch to a new character. For example:
Diana took the proffered knife. “Thanks,” she said. “I was starting to get tired of the stink.”
The mysterious rescuer smiled. “No problem,” she said. “I’m Peony, by the way.” She offered Diana her hand. “Let’s grab some horses before the bandits wake up, and we’ll get back to Jerome before morning.”
“Jerome sent you?” Diana stood, dusting herself off. She wrinkled her nose at the mud stains on her pants, and resolved to buy new ones next time they found a decent tailor.
“Oh, Jerome and I go way back.” Peony winked. Sweeping her hair out of her eyes, she motioned toward the horses. “After you.”
There’s never a confusion that Peony offers Diana her own hand – not somehow Diana’s hand. We don’t question that Diana is the one wrinkling her nose, or that they’re her pants and not Peony’s. Or that Peony sweeps her own hair out of her own eyes. Sometimes you’ll have lines where it’s a little more confusing, but if it feels awkward in the sentence, always consider if you can re-structure it another way. Like,
Diana kicked her horse into a gallop, heart beating in her chest. “Hold on!” she shouted. Peony cast her a panicked glance, tightening her hold on the rampaging oliphant’s saddle. Diana reached for her, grabbing the back of her tunic and yanking her down onto her horse.
Okay, that last line there? That one gets confusing, with all those “her"s. We COULD change it to “Diana reached for her, grabbing the back of Peony’s tunic and yanking her down onto the horse.” That takes care of a lot of them. Or, we could improve things even further by breaking apart the action, elaborating on things, and just generally stretching out the words so that it’s clearer which “she/her” is being referenced at any given time. It’s your story! Take advantage of all the room you’ve got – there will never be a time when you simply cannot rearrange things to make it clearer for your readers.
Itdoes takes effort. And sometimes a bit of verbal slight of hand. You may have to restructure sentences to avoid repetitive phrases and give yourself a good pace. (That’s a large part of rewriting and editing.)
However, like the word “said,” pronouns are invisible words. Names are not – they jump out and say HI THIS IS ME. Use them sparingly – they have power.
One final exception! Fantasy race and job titles. Again, you don’t do this with your POV characters unless you’re trying to remind the readers of something, but it IS acceptable to sometimes refer to, say, “the elf,” or “the detective,” or “the werewolf,” or “the duke.” Use them sparingly, but this is one exception – mainly because it tells/reminds us of an important fact about the character. (You might also use, say, “her older sister,” or “his father,” etc, because that also communicates information about the characters and who they are to each other. But. Again. Use sparingly.)
…okay, I’ve rambled enough, but hopefully this is somewhat useful/helpful to someone out there.
Again! Read good books! Watch how professional writers do it! Imitate, imitate, imitate! The best writing teachers in the world are good writers.
Happy writing!
wait okay no hold up this says it so much faster and clearer than any of my rambling above: identifying characters by their visual attributes tells us WHAT they are, but not WHO they are.
There. Boom. Short answer. Much clearer, much better. Thank you, tumblr user djtangerine.
yea this is why your exceptions work too! if the narrator only knows a character as “that blond guy” then calling them “the blond guy” isn’t jarring to the reader.
One way to remember this/avoid the problem: A character who apparently thinks of their close friend as “the taller girl”? Their romantic partner as just “the blonde”? That tells us something about the character, and it’s that they’re a fucking asshole.
That’s WHY it’s jarring! It’s not just an arbitrary This Is How Good Writing Works rule to memorize. It’s jarring because, like….Have you ever spoken to a business major someone who just…blatantly viewed you as an interchangeable NPC stock model in a story that was clearly about Them, The Protagonist? This inappropriate use of stilted descriptions accomplishes the same effect. Since their actions and story presumably are meant to show that they’re notan asshole, it’s jarring and off-putting because it doesn’t match what we already know about them.
At best, it just highlights the awkward and tonally inappropriate writing and wrenches the reader out of immersion. At worst, especially if it’s overused, it makes the whole piece unreadable because the character comes across as such an insincere and shallow cardboard cutout that we don’t care about them anymore!
When you first meet someone, or your relationship is such that not remembering or caring about their names is appropriate, descriptive tags aren’t jarring because that’s what they’re for–they’re the kind of shallow, surface-level details that we use to differentiate people we don’t know yet or whose identities are realistically just not that relevant to us. Like in the excellent bandit example above–even if the protagonist knows Gorm’s name at that point, it would make complete sense for her not to be on mental “first name terms” with the creepy bandit captain who has her tied up in the woods!
But if a character is thinking about someone they personally know, and they are mentally referring to that person as “the blonde” or “the taller one”, that tells us a lotabout the level of respect they have for that person. It’s probably not the message you wanted to send.
Also when you use comparatives, it always reads as there being something IMPORTANT being communicated
Like “he looked over at the younger man knowingly” insinuates that he knows something the other man does because he’s older. If he DOESNT know more because he’s older, than it doesn’t matter that he’s older, so don’t point it out!
