Focusing on my creative projects has been a real struggle for me recently. It’s not that I don’t have the time — I can find 15 or more minutes a day every day. The problem is that I absolutely cannot get going with anything. I’ve been wondering why.
First, I put this to fatigue, but that doesn’t quite explain what’s going on. I sleep more than I usually do.
The current suspect is headspace. I have a few projects going on at the moment which are causing me this very mild but constant stress. It’s nothing too dramatic, but I find myself thinking about these often. It’s as if these things implanted themselves into my brain. Even though I can’t resolve them now (there’s a fixed deadline in the future), these things are taking space that I can’t use to work on other things.
Some people are great at compartmentalising their lives so that no single aspect affects the other. I’m not one of them. I wish I was better at it.
Headspace is one of those insidious things. There isn’t any clear indicator to tell you that you don’t have enough. You’re not getting anywhere, beating yourself up about not being productive.
Sometimes, the lack of headspace prevents you from even seeing all the opportunities that are available to you. And you remain stuck. My theory is that the pandemic and the lockdowns caused many to reconsider their situation because it was the first time in years that they had some headspace.
I don’t have any evidence for it, but I feel like meditation helps you to train yourself to let go of certain things when they aren’t important — to get more headspace.
Excuse me while I go sit with my eyes closed for ten minutes, trying not to think about anything.
About the Author
Hi, I’m Radek . I’m a writer, software engineer and the founder of Writing Analytics — an editor and writing tracker designed to help you beat writer’s block and create a sustainable writing routine.
I publish a post like this every week. Want to know when the next one comes out? Sign up for my email list below to get it right in your inbox.
I hate writing terrible first drafts. Just piling words onto the page without thinking about the consequences too much. I know that terrible first drafts should have flaws — that’s the whole point. If it doesn’t suck then it isn’t a terrible first draft. But knowing about those issues and moving on makes my brain hurt.
I’m not entirely sure why this happens. I am aware of all the advice. You can always fix it later. You can’t edit a blank page. Anything is better than nothing. Sure.
Knowing something and being able to act on it are two very different things.
It could be a case of simple risk aversion. Perhaps I’m worried that by moving fast without taking time to thoroughly think about every twist and turn in the story, it’ll end up being a giant mess.
Cooking is a good analogy for this. Some people clean up as they prepare their meals. It takes longer, but you don’t have to do all the cleaning after you eat. I do this pretty often.
People on the other end of the spectrum pretty much trash their kitchen every time they cook. They use as many pots, pans and plates as they need and leave them dirty all over the place. Whatever it takes to make their meal faster.
The difference between writing and cooking is that cooking is a lot more predictable. You’re either following a recipe or doing something you’ve done many times before. You know all the steps ahead of time so a little detour here and there won’t affect you too much.
When writing, nothing is truly certain. You may have an outline, but that isn’t set in stone. You could wake up tomorrow and change your mind if you come up with a better idea. Getting to the finished product as fast as possible is crucial because that’s the only way to find out whether it’ll work.
And so I’m here, learning how to make a mess, trying to convince my brain to let me write terrible first drafts. It’s harder than it looks.
About the Author
Hi, I’m Radek . I’m a writer, software engineer and the founder of Writing Analytics — an editor and writing tracker designed to help you beat writer’s block and create a sustainable writing routine.
I publish a post like this every week. Want to know when the next one comes out? Sign up for my email list below to get it right in your inbox.
Long time no chat, beautiful humans! I’m so excited to share with you that today my first fully original piece of interactive fiction has been released and is up for you to read!
As many of you know, this past year I have been writing interactive fiction professionally and it has been truly phenomenal. Being paid to put stories to paper is such a dream. The only downside is I have been adapting existing romance novels into interactive fiction pieces. While I love it, it’s not the same as being able to write from scratch, but for the past few months I have been working on a fully original story and now I can share it with you!
Billionaire Match is a new interactive story available on the maybe app. This story is a whirlwind romance where you play the role of fake fiancee to a sexy tech billionaire. It’s got a lot of fun choices and tension. It’s sexy and sweet. And I think you all will really like it if you like my writing in general.
If you want to support me and my work (and read a wonderful story at the same time) you can download the maybe app for android or IOS.
Billionaire Match is such an exciting moment for me. I love fake dating plots. I love some good romance and interpersonal drama. And I especially love exploring how relationships develop, despite our pasts. I hope you all will enjoy it.
The wonderful team at Cinamon has done such a fantastic job with art and animation. It’s such an immersive experience.
If you read it, please let me know your thoughts! I would love to hear from you
All the love,
Lia
Also, only two more weeks left in this pregnancy! I get to meet my daughter so soon, so lots of exciting stuff going on here. Sorry I’ve been MIA. This year is crazy.
… Aurelia goes back to her work only to be interrupted hardly ten minutes by none other than Neville, he gives her a sheepish look after poking her shoulder “Hey, Ari, can you help me with this, uh, question here?”
Nervously, Aurelia glances at Neville and the parchment in his hands. His round face is bright red and his hands are shaking, she nods her head “Aye, sure what is it?”
“Why are you ignoring me,” Neville says quickly, almost in one breath but he gives her a determined stare.
Aurelia blinks, smiling slightly “Wow that was — wow, well played, Plant Boy.”
Neville gulps but the sly smile on Aurelia face makes the bold question on the tip of his tongue easier to say “I think the, um, answer is supposed to be, uh, longer than that.”
Aurelia laughs, smiling widely, she gives him finger guns and wink “I’m sure you’re right, Plant Boy but Sinistra is staring at us and I’m sure she knows just as well as we do the answer isn’t one she wants discussed on her watch.”
“After class then,” Neville says, it’s not really a question, Aurelia can tell he wants answers and he deserves them but she can’t give him truthful ones.
“Aye, after class, Plant Boy.” Aurelia agrees, smiling fading as she instantly regrets saying yes to this. What if he knows, what if Lyra actually told him and he’s going to —
“I’ll hold you to it, Sunflower Girl,” Neville say …
i’d like to thank both @itseatyourdamnapplesand@lost-in-the-shelves for helping me flesh out some future plans of make them gold (read here)! i got this idea for how i wanted part three to go and i wasn’t sure if it would be interesting to read, if it sounded right as a plot, and all that jazz! and they were both super helpful about it, and they were very kind, and i just really appreciate them!!!
… She blinks, startled by the fact that he’s genuinely annoyed. In the time she’s known Neville and Aurelia, he’s never been anything but patient with her and to see him act like this, it leaves a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach, Abigale frowns and scuffs her feet against the snow-covered ground.
“Well, it’s not that she’s confiding in me or anything, like, we’re not even hanging out for fun. I’m teaching her Legilimency and Occlumency, she needs it because of Professor Black, who’s like a total twat,” Abigale says quickly.
Neville’s annoyance fades back into concern “What did Lyra do to her, is that why she hasn’t talked to me?”
“Well, Longbottom, it’s up to her to tell you that. And she will, she doesn’t want to lie to you, she’ll tell you anything — anyway, I’ve got to, like, go. I will tell her to talk to you, don’t worry, Longbottom, I am rooting for you,” Abigale says, winking at him. …
… Apparently all the professors were told by Dumbledore to pass the message along to Aurelia because on the way up she passed Professor Flitwick and Professor Sinistra both tell her a similar message. And Aurelia finds herself very uneasy and angry by the time she gets to his office. She doesn’t understand why he wants to speak with her, she hasn’t done anything wrong.
Entering the office she’s met with sight of Dumbledore and Umbridge — ah, fuck this can’t be good. Aurelia shakes in both anger and nerves as Dumbledore and Umbridge leer at her, they both look feverishly excited about something and that makes Aurelia feel very queasy. She scuffs her feet against the ground, biting her lip and she wants to stand tall but she feels very small “Why am I here?”
“Did the professor who told you I needed to see you not tell you why I’ve requested to speak with you,” Dumbledore questions, sounding slightly exasperated as he spares a glance at Umbridge, Aurelia shakes her head.
Dumbledore doesn’t look like he’s going to explain but it’s not like he would get the chance to because Umbridge clears her throat and pulls out a long black envelope with the Ministry of Magic emblem on it in gold ink. …
Today, my brain refuses to process new thoughts. After a dose of my meds for anxiety/panic this is even more true. (Not sure that’s right). I’m gonna reread earlier chapters of fics and try to be ready to start in again tomorrow in my downtime…
Problem: I wanna write but I can’t get my thoughts to work… not on the fics I want to work on at least…. This will either result in another one shot or putting off fics that have already waited too long
I will be back writing soon! Been planning ideas and working though my requests, I have lacked motivation for awhile but I will be back very soon. Keep your eye out on this space ☺️
Might have a delay this week with posting. I’m in an incredible amount of discomfort and pain with this UTI and I don’t want to add the stress of trying to write everyday. I just want to curl up in a ball. Sorry about this.
The next chapter of All or Nothing (KakaSaku) is currently with my beta
I finished the rough draft of Disaster (KakaSaku, a prequel to the events of I’ll be the Moon and All or Nothing)
I’m currently writing the next chapter of Healing Hands (which needed an expansive update from the original. So far I’ve added three new scenes to this chapter and several thousand words)
I have decided to stop posting my work on fanfiction.net because I tend to get the most negative responses there or no responses, and it’s a hassle to post there. I will continue updating the stories that are already there, but all one shots will be on A03 only for now
I’m going to try to do these updates more frequently because they hold me accountable, kind-of. Maybe weekly
December is looking super busy, so I have no idea how many of my goals I’ll actually manage to accomplish
I’m going through all my whumptober stories and getting those posted, so you should be seeing quite a bit of stuff popping up if you’re subbed on A03
My commissions are currently closed
Currently Writing
Fragile Strength - (Kakashi/Sakura) - This is a story where Sakura loses her eyesight that’s become a slow burn, mutual pining mess that I can’t wait to share. As of this moment, it’s 47,000 words (oops) and I’m in love with everything about it. I’m also trying to convince myself not to go ahead and start posting it.
Currently Editing (hoping to post this month)
Losing Control-(Kakashi/Sakura, Genma/Sakura) Chapter six is finished and waiting for a quick edit/beta. Those of you waiting for the Kakashi and Sakura side of this mess will be happier with this chapter than those on the Genma/Sakura side, probably.
Healing Hands - (Tenzo/Sakura) - Chapter Thirteen is being edited, I know it’s overdue but I got busy with Whumptober. This next chapter is also a tough one. We didn’t leave Tenzo in a good place, and this chapter needs some fleshing out. I’m going to start limiting the amount I work on other stories to push this chapter through.
Plans for the Future
Heart in a Silver Cage - (Genma/OC) This story is still very much on the table and I plan to work on the next chapter once I’ve finished with the two pieces above. The next chapter is the first mission chapter so I’ve been working through some …technical difficulties to make sure the plot works.
Altered Reality - (Kakashi/Rin) Yes, I still plan to finish this. Yes, I’m still kind of stuck on the plot because I skipped something important from the outline. But, I’m rewatching Naruto and I’m up to the chunin exams, so I’m hoping that shakes something loose and I get some inspiration to finish the next chapter.
