Remus takes Sirius’ scars away from him. The ones you could see, anyway. [slight AU]

cw: scars, past injuries, implied child abuse

Sirius ran away from home at age thirteen, midsummer. The first time Remus saw him after was in a corner of the Potters’ garden. 

James told him about how Sirius stumbled from the Knight Bus to their front door, clothes soaked through with rain. And blood. The only thing he had on him was his wand. He’d all but collapsed once they got him inside, sending Euphemia into a frenzy trying to heal the gashes that were all over his skin.

Remus found him in the garden, and sat down next to Sirius on the grass, just on the edge of the shade Sirius was hunched under. He must have spied Remus coming, but made no indication to acknowledge him besides burrowing his head further into his knees. Remus had never, never seen him so beaten down, so small. He tried to place a hand on his shoulder, Sirius flinched away.

“You never wore long sleeves in the summer.” Remus said.

“Mrs. Potter did say the sun wouldn’t help the scars healing.”

From his hand white knuckled around his knees, Remus could see the pink lines of recent scars reaching into the sleeves of the sweater.

“You could show me.” Remus said.

Sirius shook his head without lifting it, somehow drawing even more into himself. There was a strange ache in Remus’ chest, and he reached for Sirius’ hand with his, prying loose a thumb and curling his fingers around it. The two of them sat there silent in the long summer grass, until Sirius’ fingers loosened, and started to brush across the thin raised lines of scars on the back of Remus’ own hand. 

“You could show me.” Remus said again.

And then, slowly, wordlessly, Sirius lifted his head while peering at Remus like a scared small animal. 

His eyes were red, his hair a mess clinging to the frame of his forehead. And there were one, two angry-looking gashes across his face and down his cheek. It was the sort of scars Remus knew by looking would stay long after it fully healed. Sirius didn’t let go of Remus’ hand, still clutched against his knee, as he watched Remus watching him. Until eventually, he let out a watery chuckle.

“Thanks for not crying on me.” Sirius said, sniffling and forcing a smile.

Remus tugged at his arm, for Sirius to turn and face him. Remus took both Sirius’ hands in his, as he finally let his knees fall from his chest.

“May I?” Remus asked, thumbing at the loose sleeves of the sweater. 

Sirius nodded, letting Remus push the sleeves up his arm, revealing the criss-cross that jarred against Sirius’ smooth pale skin. He knew Sirius was staring between his and Remus’ own exposed arms, weighing up each of their marks of torn flesh, from claws and curses.

Look at us, Remus wanted to say, what a matched set we are. But it’s not the same. An unnamed horror was growing behind his throat and he tried not to imagine a mother who’d do this to her thirteen year old son.

“Your scars don’t change who you are.” Remus said.

Sirius looked away.

“Your scars don’t change who you are. It’s what you said to me, remember?”

“But they do.” Sirius said, barely a breath, “They made me like this, my, my family—”

“They are not your family,” Remus said fiercely.

Sirius gave him one short, grateful side glance, before it broke with a breathless sob choked into a cough. “How dare they— They want me to never forget, never ever really get away from them— And I can’t. I can’t let them mark me like this—”

Remus didn’t think he’d said this to anyone else. James had grabbed him aside, eyes full terrified and full with worry, asking him to please, try and talk to him, he wouldn’t tell me anything. 

“Moony, it hurt so much. And I— how could I be saying this to you when you have to go through this every month—”

“No, Sirius, stop, it’s not the same.”

“And I can’t even sleep, I keep having dreams. And I can’t tell James about it with the way he looks at me. He told me how in the end they’re family, and that meant they must still care—”

“Sirius, James got it wrong, he didn’t understand—”

Sirius shook his head. A bunch of thirteen year-olds, what did any of them understand?

“I still don’t— Remus, even Reg—”

Remus pulled him forward, held him tight.

“What if,” Sirius said against his shoulder, as if confessing a worst fear, “what if they’d really broken me, made me a monster just like them?”

Remus felt his eyes sting. He clutched Sirius even tighter by way of answer. He wished the caress of sun and soft winds could take all the scars and hurt away, but they didn’t make him feel any less helpless. It was such a bright day, with only plums of clouds crowding the edge of the open, too-bright sky. Somewhere, the pale arc of a moon hung drowned out by all the light. Remus could feel Sirius’ shoulders shaking in his arms, hurting. Let me, he thought, let me carry it instead, but there was nothing, nothing Remus could do to ease any of his pain.

Though perhaps. There was perhaps something.

Remus softly drew back, hands sliding down Sirius’ arm, drawing his attention with the deliberate motion. He could feel the swirling in his chest, a burning urge to heal, to ease, to take away the hurt— and felt it focus in the magic between his fingers. Quietly he reached out, traced with a thumb over a still-healing mark that began on the inside of Sirius’ wrist. And following the warm trail of his finger, the scar sizzled, dissolved away. 

Sirius’ eyes widened, “how did you— even Effie couldn’t—”

Then it reappeared, tracing its way up along Remus’ arm. His brows tightened a little at the prickle of pain that accompanied the scar, now looking silvery and aged, etching into his skin.

“No— no!” Sirius gasped, “What are you doing?”

“They can’t mark you. They don’t get to, Sirius. I could carry this for you”, he said. Because they were young, young enough to care for each other with a kind of bottomless, unabashed sincerity. But old enough to see that their friendship with each other was the purest thing they had in their life, to really mean it when they said ‘I’d do anything for you’. To Remus at thirteen, this all made perfect sense.

“It doesn’t matter. The scars don’t matter at all.” Remus said, bolder now. He traced another scar, relocating it from Sirius to him. His own arm barely looked any different, there were already so many lines on his skin.

“Remus,stop.”

“You said my scars don’t change me, or how you see me.”

“No, of course not, but—”

“But it changes how you see yourself.”

Sirius fell silent. He looked at Remus pleadingly without quite knowing what he was pleading for.

“I— Remus, that doesn’t mean you should take my scars—”

“Shh. I need to concentrate for this one. Don’t move.” Remus said, as his hands moved up to cup Sirius’ chin.

Tears started gathering again in Sirius’ eyes, though he didn’t move to stop Remus, “Why are you doing this? Why?” 

Because they were thirteen, and didn’t know that lines on the body didn’t matter. Or they didn’t know how much they mattered. 

“Sirius, listen,” With a thumb, Remus wiped away the tear just slipping out, and started tracing the scar that began just under the eye, “When you met a boy covered with scars, you tried to help him though everyone else would have thought him a monster. You gave him friendship and kindness and love and it’s so much more than he deserved—” 

“—No, Remus you—”

“Shh. It’s fine. You don’t have to say all that.” He moved his thumb to the second scar, just across the cheek. A trail of tingles was making its way across his face too. 

“The way you stand up for your friends, stand up to your cousins, your parents— You are the bravest boy I know.” He finished, hands falling to his sides.

And Sirius didn’t say anything for a long while, his gaze barely daring to waver from his eyes, flickering with a thousand emotions. He looked scared and all kinds of overwhelmed all at once. Then, slowly, he lifted a hand to Remus’ cheek, tracing where the new scar appeared. 

Remus had almost surprised himself with how much he said, he was never the one with words. But it’d always been Sirius who brought it out of him. When Remus moved his arm to hold Sirius’ hands, they snapped to catch his.

There was no point denying what he’d done. No point second guessing why he did or if he should have done. Clearly, Sirius wasn’t going to let him do it anymore as well.

So with a sad little smile, Remus squeezed his hands before quietly standing and slipping away.

-

When Euphemia caught him, brows creasing from seeing Sirius’ scar on his face, Remus pursed his lips and shrugged a little.

“Please don’t be mad at Sirius, Mrs. Potter. It was me who wanted to do it.”

-

It was near sundown when Sirius came inside and found him. 

“Remus!” he called out, rushed over, and caught him in the tightest embrace.  And years from then Remus might look in the mirror and wonder— wonder. The marks they left the promises they etched deep into the mind and the tiny ways they carried and broke each other. But now, with his nose buried in Sirius’ hair, Remus could just see the brilliant sunset beyond the window, and the slip of moon that was starting to glow.

Imagine Remus and you move in your first flat together and every morning Padfoot appears infront of your door and James is behind him like „sorry, my big, black dog wanted to come to breakfast with you.“

(Not my picture)

I’m so busy dating fictional characters, that I actually don’t waste my time to think about “real” people.

Motion Sickness

Remus Lupin x Reader

a/n: I’m going on a road trip to New Orleans for my birthday tomorrow and it got me thinking about Remus on a road trip and just going on a road trip with the Marauders. Then it got a little… heated lol

summary: On a road trip with the Marauders, you try and avoid getting motion sickness but you’re having a hard time not focusing on the moving bus and the passing scenery. Luckily enough, your boyfriend Remus has just the thing to distract you, as long as you keep quiet.

warning: MDNI 18+, fingering, degradation, praise, overstimulation, kinda public sex, slight exhibitionism, If I missed anything lmk!

word count: 2.1k

You rested your head against Remus’ shoulder, closing your eyes and trying your hardest to keep your mind off the Volkswagen jostling your body so that motion sickness doesn’t overtake you. 

You both sat in the third row of seats as James drove, Lily holding the map and instructing him when to turn. Sirius and Peter both laid across the second row, sleeping soundly. Remus’ head turned away from the window, feeling you rest against him. His lips immediately meet your temple, kissing it tenderly.

He couldn’t see your pained yet determined expression from his height but you knew he could somehow sense your wariness. He kept his lips against your skin, letting its warmth spread through your body. 

“Alright, love?” He questioned, hot breath tickling your skin, causing you to shudder slightly. You groan, shaking your head as the bus hits a particularly nasty bump. 

“Trying not to focus on the bus movin’. Don’ wanna get sick,” you mumble, voice muffled as you nuzzle your face against his shoulder. 

“Gettin motion sickness again?” Remus asked, voice tinged with worry. He knew how long car rides got to you. You nod against him, slouching against the seat. 

“Think so,” you respond, trying to think of something besides the sensation of feeling every little rock the van rolls over. 

“Gotta keep your mind off it, dove,” Remus says, hand moving to pat your bare knee, fingers tickling the edge of your dress. You groan, closing your eyes and shuffling closer to him. 

“I’m trying but I can’t help it,” you whine, internally chastising yourself for acting like this. But you dreaded the oncoming pain and you demanded comfort. 

“Want some help?” Remus asked, voice suggestive as fingers began lightly grazing your leg. You subconsciously leaned into the touch. 

“How could you help with something like this?” You asked curiously, mind distant as you tried not to focus on anything too hard. 

“Could offer you a little distraction…” he trailed off, his voice continuing with that suggestive lilt. It didn’t click until his teasing fingers began making their way up closer to your core. Your eyes shot open as they made contact. 

“R-Rem,” you stuttered in disbelief, looking up at him with furrowed brows. Remus kept his gaze ahead as your breathing started to pick up, heat blossoming in your stomach as Remus rubbed his fingers along your clothed slit. 

“Just keep your eyes ahead, dove. Keep your thoughts on me, on what I’m doin’ to ya,,” he spoke lowly, a rasp washing over his voice as he pressed his fingers more firmly against you. You clench around nothing and your eyes widen at the effect his words have on you. Letting out a small whimper you glance ahead, looking around at your friends and the small space you currently occupied. 

“Remus, w-we’re in a van. With everyone,” you say nervously, looking back up at him as you try not to rock against his hand and hating how much the idea turns you on. Remus continues to keep his eyes forward. 

“James and Lily got the radio so loud they won’t hear anything, and Sirius and Peter are knocked out,” he explains simply. He then slowly moves his gaze down to meet yours before raising a single brow. “So… as long as you keep quiet little one, no one will suspect a thing. Think you can keep quiet for me?” A small moan escapes you, not being able to help from reacting to the pet name mixed with his fingers pressing the material of your panties down against your clit. You shake your head lightly, brows furrowed. 

“I don’t know, Rem,” you answer, voice shaky with uncertainty. A softness falls over Remus’ expression as he takes you in. 

“We don’t have to do this, you know. Say the word and I’ll hold your hand and rub your stomach when it starts to ache,” he says, his voice gentle and soothing. But then his fingers flex against your core and his eyes sharpen. “But judging by this,” he starts, a smirk overtaking his lips. His fingers are quicker than you can react but you can feel it as Remus pushes aside your panties and gathers up your slick. You stare at him wide-eyed as he removes his hand and holds it up in front of you both. His smirk is mischievous, the gleam in his eye fierce as he speaks. “You’re dripping,” he says smoothly, voice coated in self-satisfaction. 

“Remus!” You scold, tugging his hand down and getting it out of your friends’ sight. Remus laughs, moving his arm out of your grip and pops the fingers in his mouth. He moans around his digits and you melt against him, entranced by the sight as you feel yourself growing wetter. 

 His hand falls back on your leg, only now it grips the inside of your thigh, your dress having previously ridden up. Your eyes follow the movement and remain on the hold as you watch his spit smear against your thigh. 

“Let me take care of you,” he says softly, practically begging to help you. Your tongue darts out, licking your lip as your gaze remains on his fingers. 

“O-okay,” you force out, still not sure how well you can keep quiet but your growing desperation overcomes such doubt. 

“Yeah?” He asks, checking in with you, wanting you to be certain, needing your full consent. You merely nod, chest tightening and breath hitching at the anticipation. 

But suddenly Remus’ hand snaps away from your thigh and tugs at your chin, forcing your eyes on him. Your lips part as you feel his damp fingers against your skin. 

“Words, dove, I need words,” he grits out, jaw slightly clenched and eyes wild as he looks down at you, gaze flickering over your face, checking up on you. You watch him for a moment, savoring the expression before you speak. 

“Please take care of me,” you whimper out quietly.  Remus’ eyes roll back into his head as a low guttural groan escapes him. When his eyes flutter back open, his touch is leaving your chin and moving inside your panties. 

Two fingers spread out your folds and slip through your wetness. You feel yourself rock against it, breath increasing as pleasure sparks through your core. 

You hear Remus inhale deeply before slipping two fingers into your slick center. You choke on a whimper, hips jerking at the thick digits entering you. He starts at a steady pace, moving them in and out of your desperate hole. You whine quietly, cunt fluttering around his fingers and hips jerking to meet his thrusts. You hear Remus chuckle and a moment later you feel Remus’ hot breath on your ear, sending shivers down your spine and increasing your pleasure. 

“What got you so turned on, love? You’re soaking my hand. Was it the idea of me getting you off in front of all our friends? Was it the possibility of getting caught? Or was it my words? Do you like hearing the dirty things I plan on doin’ to ya..? Or is it all three?” He taunts, voice holding a sinister twinge. Your eyes squeeze shut as you listen to him and you can’t stop yourself from clenching down on his fingers. You hear a huff of laughter. “All three, aye? I can work with that…” he trails off, sounding slightly more focused. He moves deeper within you, fingers curling against your walls and igniting your nerves. 

“Ah— Remus!” You cry out as quietly as possible, letting a surprised moan follow as he crooks his fingers, sliding over a sponged area inside you that sends a jolt through your body and black spots in your vision. A familiar coil begins to tighten in your stomach. 

“Shh, quiet sweetheart. Wouldn’t want our friends to interrupt now would we?” Remus teases, a wondrous smirk decorating his expression as he continues to watch you and the pretty faces you make when you try and hold back your pleasure. 

“F-faster— please,” you beg out breathlessly, needing more friction to move you closer to the edge, waves of pleasure pushing and pulling you. Remus makes a sound of disbelief though his fingers quicken, heading towards a brutal pace. 

“You want me to go faster now? Why just a few minutes ago you weren’t sure you could do this. Now look at you, you filthy thing. Makin’ a mess of my hand, moaning like a desperate slut. That’s what you are aren’t you? My desperate little slut,” he spits out, fingers pounding in and out of you, the force jerking your hips. 

Your brows furrow at the pleasure that wracks through your body, the coil tightening in your stomach, drawing you closer to release. Your jaw drops in shock as Remus moves his thumb to your clit, moving it in tight circles. 

“Yes!” You hiss out before a loud moan escapes you without permission. You throw your head back against the seat as your hips buck up. 

“Is she ok back there?” A sudden voice sounds out through the van. And it’s only then you notice anything past the fog clouding your mind and you suddenly realize the music had been turned down. Your stomach clenched wondering how long it had been. 

You freeze completely, keeping your head back and body still. Remus hesitates when Lily asks the question but quickly collects himself and continues the movement of his fingers, moving slower and more languidly but never relenting the beautiful torture on your clit. 

Your breath hitches and you curse yourself for enjoying the thrill of this so much, hating how the possibility of getting caught causes electricity to rush through your veins. 

“A bit of motion sickness is all,” Remus replies smoothly,

his gaze meeting Lily’s now. You can imagine Lily’s sympathetic frown behind your closed eyes. 

“Awe, the poor dear. Well don’t worry, love, there’s a rest stop not too far. We’ll stop for a break soon,” she assures with a firm nod. Remus sends her a charming smile and breathes out a sigh of relief. 

“Sounds brilliant, thanks Lil,” Remus responds and you tense up, forcing moans back down your throat and ignoring ripples of arousal coursing through you. 

“Don’t mention it,” Lily calls back, appearing none the wiser as she spins back forward and turns the music back up. Remus rounds his head to look down at you again. 

“You have got to be more quiet, dove,” he says through clenched teeth. His fingers begin picking up their pace and your lips part. “Don’t want all our friends to know that you can’t even go a car ride without needing something to fill you up,” he whispers harshly, fingers thrusting into you just as harsh and thumb stimulating your clit perfectly. 

“I-I’m close, Rem,” you say, voice shaking and stumbling over words. Tears prick at your eyes, causing you to open them in an attempt to blink them back. Remus lets a wide smirk transform his face. 

“Of course you are, and you’ve been doing so well, taking my fingers so nicely. Now, go on, be a good girl and make a mess out of James’ van for me,” he says, his voice somehow both soft and mean at the same time. Your head falls forward and your eyes widen just as Remus moves to pinch your clit.

Pain mixed with immense pleasure causes the coil to snap and euphoria to wash over you like a tidal wave as you’re finally pushed off the edge and into a blissful orgasm. 

“Oh god—“ you choke out, voice strained as you hold back screams of pleasure. Your body shakes and jerks as your orgasm moves through you. Remus exhales sharply, continuing to work you through it. 

“Clench my fingers, pretty girl, just like that. Take me for all I’m worth…” he hisses out, breath heavy as he watches you. His eyes fog over, pupils blown wide as he looks over every inch of you, memorizing every change of expression and jerk of your body. Your orgasm begins to calm but Remus doesn’t stop in his movements. Your features twist as overstimulation starts to take hold. “God you’re beautiful, all ruined and fucked out,” Remus says, voice light and dazed. You whimper and start to squirm away from his fingers as pain overwhelms the pleasure. 

“S’to much, Rem,” you mumble out, feeling a sense of tiredness replace the arousal that had previously consumed you. 

“Can’t give me another one?” Remus asks with a frown. You shake your head tiredly, head falling limply against his shoulder. Remus sighs and carefully moves his fingers out of you. You whine lightly before relaxing back against the seat. After wiping away the cum on his fingers and the mess between your thighs, his hand rests back on your leg and starts massaging away the small tremors that remain. “Well, I suppose one’s served its purpose. Rest little one, we’ll be there before you know it,” he says softly to your already half-asleep form, kissing your forehead and turning back to look outside the window as he had been doing before. 

Chapter 7 - Remus‘ breakfast

The post on tiktok that made so many people cry (and I am sorry)

Chapter 5 - Remus nearly falling asleep in class

(I know, he does not look 11 here)

Chapter 2 - Remus pulling an ugly face at Sirius

Chapter 20 - „…Can’t read them…“

(Finally also uploading here WOOP WOOP - or should I say HOOT HOOT (ok I am not funny))

Chapter 19 - „He looked out of the window again, pressing his forehead to the cool glass…“

Woooo guys, I am at the end of the first year! Any suggestions for the summer chapter?

Chapter 17 - Happy (late) birthday Remus!

Finally the Moonycake is finished :))))

Chapter 15 - Snivellus attacking Remus

(This took long ahhhh)

Chapter 13 - Sirius has shown Remus his late Christmas present

… the „reading“ spell

(I am really sorry about this one, and also sad. I nearly cried while drawing, also because of sad music, to get into the mood)

⚠️tw - wounds, bruises, scars

Chapter 11 - Madam Pomfrey heals Remus new scars

(I got so sad drawing this)

Chapter 10 - Sirius reads to Remus

-

(That shitty detailed book, why did I choose a scene with a big book in the center lol)

ATYD Spoiler chapter 9

⚠️tw - scars because of child abuse

Chapter 9 - Sirius shows Remus his scars