like a… good. like a st- like you-you know how sometimes you put helmets on people who are going into
dangerous situations
because they’re just
regular-ass people?
and not like
superheroes?
i need..
A HELMET.
heathcliff:ummm
I need a helmet!
heathcliff:okay! uh just a regular old helmet? or do you want a..
LIKE A GOOD HELMET
YA DUMB CAT,
A Helmet!
[travis laughing]
griffin:he looks kind of…
DON’T FUCK AROUND WITH ME. IM NOT HA- ST-STOKED TO BE ASKIN.
I NEED A HELMET, ALRIGHT?
I Need A Helmet!
heathcliff: um okaay..
griffin: he-he looks pissed off, he’s like
heathcliff:let me see what, lemme see
SHUT UP!
[others laughing]
HEY!
YOU TWO
heathcliff: lemme see what i can do
PIPE DOWN, ALRIGHT?
YUCK IT UP
I’M GLAD YOU ALL ARE STILL.
FUCKIN X MEN.
I’M JUST A REGULAR
DIPSHIT
AND I NEEDA FUCKIN HELMET.
griffin:uh he says uh-
I’m sorry,
CAT.
I need a helmet.
heathcliff:yeah, um, i get that, um… any sort of
PFFffFfFfFfFffFffTT
heathcliff:design considerations or…?
I might be wasting this not getting a
TOMBSTONE
now that i think about it.
[others laugh]
them shits is expensive
i-can you get me a
hologram tombstone?
NAHH
alright, you know what? that’s
stinkin’ thinkin’.
i’ll start with a helmet.
griffin:uh he dives down-
travis:and aubrey yells:
aubrey:VIKING!
griffin:he dives down and-
No, like,
cool…
griffin:he dives down into the abyss and uhhhhhhh takes a while down there? uh and you see like a few flashes of light and he uh comes back up. and i think he’s got like five or six different helmet designs and he’s like:
heathcliff:umm you seem like you’re having maybe a bit of a. bit of a
week
so uhhhhhhhhh i-i thought maybe you could. pick your favorite? maybe you could have some fun with that
griffin:and there’s like a… like you know like a motorcycle helmet, there’s a viking helmet for sure, there’s like a knight’s full helm with the like guard in front of it, there’s like a sortuva modern combat helmet uhhhhhh with like some like the netting wrapped around it, uhhhhh i think he offers you a few different helmet designs.
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
aubrey, whispering:Viking!
ned, also whispering: Viking!
gimme the one that looks like a
skateboard helmet.
[clint laughing]
god, at least i can wear that to work
[laughing continues]
‘cause i’m skateboarding to
WORK.
by the way.
ned:so you can’t
run
without getting tired anymore?
I CAN’T LIKE RUN EIGHT MILES WITHOUT GETTING TIRED ANYMO-
I think there are more TAZ fans on Tumblr than on Twitter so I’mma gonna post these here. I just started listening bout 6 months ago and now I’m all caught up. Justin tends to make characters I HAVE to draw.
duck newton’s ‘convincing lie’: nah, so, okay. right, so - the pizza hut sign started to fall - cause of the, weather? and, he ran up there on… a fire escape? and tried to - push it… with a bat… dammit, nah he just pushed it - and it fell - but then he fell - cause he got shocked. i bet - mmm! i didn;t see, i was, uh, ah, shit! hey fol- hey, guys rewind, i. hey guys rewind a second ah fuck! i was inside i didnt see anything! i dont know thisman! i do know this man. his name - fuck! alright. i uh, i - here nnnnnn alright so. this man is name is ned and he’s, uh a friend of mine and i don’t know what the hell happened to him but,,, you know this guy. hes always getting into something. i don’t know i was in the building i almost got killed by a pizza hut sign i might be in shock
[ID: Digital drawing of Beacon and Duck. First, Beacon is a sword with an intricately-crafted blade and guard. There is a mouth with sharp teeth at the center of the guard. The hilt is checkered and has a green gem embedded at the bottom. The text around Beacon says “My name is Beacon. I am the light that stands at the edge of the darkness. I am the tower above the fog. I am the most beautiful, terrible weapon ever created, and I have spent the last twenty years in a fleaaaa market.” Second, Duck holds Beacon up in one hand and stares suspiciously at it. Beacon says “And hhhow have you been.” Duck says “Oh Christ.” /ID]
Aubrey: Oh! Is there a water treatment plant in Kepler? That might be… good.
Duck:Or very bad. That is connected to all of the water in Kepler.
Aubrey: Admittedly yeah, but-
Duck:I mean, I would love it if we were fighting it and it was all purified, I would love that if it was drinkable- wait a minute. You think I could drink the whole thing?
Ned: You have a backup to the big desert plan: a dehumidifier store.
Duck: Ok, listen, I don’t even know if that exists. I was- it was pretty late when I was cooking these up okay? And I honestly lost the plot pretty quickly after that, I don’t even remember what the third one I wrote was. Please don’t give me any crao about it, alright guys?
Ned: Uh, sure… big lake! Hmm.
Duck: Ok listen, I was- I wasn’t really thinking at that point ok? I was tired, and it came to me-
Ned: No, no! You went to a lot of trouble, I’m very proud of you.
Woodbridge: Is that a jetpack? What’s going on there?
Duck: Please be careful with it. It honestly scares the shit out of me. I don’t even really like carrying it, I’m really getting pretty stoked about taking it home. I’m half tempted to leave it on the ground as we go back to our world, but I figure I’ll hold onto it. If nothing else, I can chuck it at something and try to blow it up. It’s called the Fly Master.
Woodbridge: Uh, rad name. Please do go though. That would be fantastic for me, and for- you know, everyone.
Beacon:I was so assured of Duck Newton’s destruction, I had begun fantasizing about my next owner. Would they be exciting, willing to take adventures? So many possibilities awaited me while I had a pleasant daydream in the water. But I was very… happyto see you survived, Duck Newton.
Griffin:Barclay picks up a bucket and like, throws it at the water, and it just gets sucked up into the sphere, and he just shrugs like “I don’t know, I threw a bucket, what do you do?”
Duck:If we ever fight a monster that could control the power of heart, we’re all fucked, because that is the most powerful element imaginable. I mean, I’ll fucking stab love, I don’t care.
Aubrey:Well, I’ve got good news, and, uh… potentially bad news. Good news is I think we’re safe for the time being, ‘cause whatever was in that pool seems to be gone.
Duck:All right, mission accomplished. Good work, Pine Guard.
Aubrey:Then we’ve got the bad news, which is… I think maybe it went into, you know, all the water? Like in town? I think it’s not confined to the pool.
Justin: So, I’ll tell you what Duck does. Duck has his sword out and he… just stands there. He doesn’t have any idea what to do. He knows that his friend is in danger, he knows that there’s a monster in the thing, and he’s got nothing. For Duck, this is like… it’s 100 percent the situation that he kind of feared would happen. He doesn’t know how to do this. He doesn’t know what to do. And I don’t think he does… anything.
Griffin:[referring to Duck] Okay, so you were kind of a wastoid, and then you discovered the beauty of the pines.
Justin:Well, no, he just wanted to- he hid in the pines. I mean, like, I think it feeds into… he wasn’t somebody with an abiding love of the world. He wasn’t someone with a call to duty. He wasn’t somebody who thought he was headed for big things.
Duck: We’re kind of… enthusiasts into this sorta… cryptozoological world. You know that weird stuff happens here in Kepler. And Ned’s got his sort of interests, and Aubrey’s got hers, and I’m interested in like, creatures and stuff, and Aubrey’s interested in magic, and Ned likes to keep track of like, how people make up monsters and stuff. They call ‘em cryptids, but-
Calvin:I’m not making this up. [nervous laugh] Oh, God.
Duck:Oh, no, I know, I know, I know, I know, no no no, I understand. What I’m tellin’ you is… we have… weird stuff happens in Kepler, right? Like, that won’t come as a surprise to you. We all know it. But sometimes people who have ill intentions like to use that to try and cover up whatever, you know, dark stuff they wanna get up to. So we know about the sorta cryptozoological stuff. We’re interested in it. Sometimes we’ll just like to help out, poke around, poke a few holes, and make it a little bit easier for the real heroes,
“If we ever fight a monster that could control the power of heart, we’re all fucked, because that is the most powerful element imaginable. I mean, I’ll fucking stab love, I don’t care.”
AIGHT! I’ve been feeling under the weather lately (and awaiting a covid-result, which I’m 99% sure is negative), so I’ve spent my time trying to illustrate the first part of TAZ Amnesty. There are more pages, but these are the more… finished of the sketches. We’ll see how far I get. But these are a handful so far.
Also, I don’t know why I did this! Seriously - I don’t like drawing cars, plants, environments, panels, background, physical object and… yeah… most things that ain’t people. Phew ho-damn.
Anyhoo, I hope to do more; I have most of the first episode written and sketched out.
Enjoy, and please to share :) This is the first time I’m trying out comic, so pardon any sort of rookie mistakes, and please let me know if you do comics and can provide some good suggestions.
Yes, and now to one of my favourite podcasts D&D stoy arcs. The wonderful McElroy family have created a wonderful story arc, full of monsters, cryptids and wonderful characters, and I’ve been lucky enough to be able to sketch some of the npc. I adore each and every one of them. More will come.
Hey so here’s my The Adventure Zone Amnesty video, finally! Big thanks to the whole McElroy family for all the inspiration over the years. Hope y’all enjoy!
