How emotional are INFJs?

Their hearts are so sensitive and they are so overwhelmed with feelings to the point where their hearts extend 300 meters around them like a radar range. In this range around the INFJs, their hearts will detect the littlest feelings. When they detect a surge of sadness or anything negative, they won’t be ok until they come to the rescue! They’re like firefighters who fight negative feelings and don’t expect a thanks from others, but it’s appreciated.

They are amazing people! They listen and listen and listen because they want to give you a chance to speak. They internalize a lot of things and don’t like to share things or ideas before they perfect them! They don’t like others to judge them.

They are amazing beings. They’re so mature no matter what their age is. They’re so wise and understanding to the point that they seem like they’ve lived l this life a hundred times before.

What are the three main defining qualities of INFJs?

All parts of being the moralistic, judgemental, altruistic nutcases that make them so interesting (love INFJs):

1. Moral maturity - they have a very good view of what is right or wrong and they go out of their way to improve that view - via news, documentaries, travel, academia etc.

2. Truly living the moral code - they don’t preach - they act on their morals. INFJs nudge, council, help and crusade (if needed) to make the world a better place, especially for those less fortunate. This is not an ideal to them - it is a way of life. If all your friends abandon you and you are alone in the worst of circumstances / have no one to help, the person who comes to stand by you will be an INFJ. The moral living thing also means they do not tend to give a crap about shallow stuff like personal wealth / ostentatious possessions.

3. INFJ Social Interaction - part of the moral thing, I figure, is being quite judgemental about people. INFJs tend to make snap decisions about people - classifying them as good / amusing / deep people they do want to be around, boring / shallow people they only engage in superficial conversation with and bad / really superficial people they avoid at all costs. INFJs then tend to try and steer all social engagement to one on one or small group activities with the good people. INFJs will often become resistant, rebellious and even sulky / petulant if compelled to go to large social engagements where people they don’t like will be present.

What are some truths about INFJs?

1. INFJs love helping people.

2. They soak up other people’s energy.

3. It takes work to get to know them.

4. They hate small talk.

5. They are introverts but people will guess them to be extroverts because of their extroverted feelings.

6. They can often mimic other personality types.

7. Don’t trifle with them. You don’t want to be on their bad side.

8. They are better at writing than they are at verbal communication.

9. They may not show you their deepest self for years.

10. Lastly, never lie to an INFJ. They will know and it will matter!

What are some different versions of the INFJ personality type?

INFJ’s shadow side: darkness and anger

In the unlikely event you have betrayed an INFJ, cut deeply through their hearts then watch out - because nothing is more frightening than seeing one get their all. Afterall, Jesus was apparently an model INFJ. That’s right. Beware the scorch. You get him angry and he’ll go locust on your arse.

Of course, everything below is ‘worst case under-developed’ INFJ anger cases. It isn’t what INFJ’s do all the time. It is, extremely rare. Most have the patience of an iceberg waiting for hell to freeze over. Or a turn the other cheek style. But for those of you who want some insight into the darker, shadier side of an INFJ …venture down below, i dare you. — INFJ Anger style: The incorruptible ninja on a vendetta:

It means facing your fears and exposing the grittiness of your own human existence. Sound familiar INFJ? Okay, it sounds like martyr-dom and yes, it is. An INFJ knows ALL about martyrdom.

In extremely threatening cases, an INFJ can go all angry ninja style on anybody’s arse. And i mean emotionally. They will cut you up and hang you out to dry. Emotionally. That is the key word here.

He we won’t stop until he’s wasted your emotional landscape, and neither will we. INFj’s at their weakest or best can be like double edged swords, yes we can see deep into people’s hearts, their motivations their good qualities, mirror their thoughts, actions and their desires to bring you relief or joy. INFJ’s listen not only with their ears, but with their heart, they can process and nurture people’s good qualities instinctively and mirror your what you want to hear. They are capable of forgiveness even of those with heinous crimes on their records, because yes - they know instinctively that everybody is human, all of us are interconnected and we all make mistakes, an INFJ has an uncanny ability to recognize that everybody is just a mirror of themselves. The best INFJ’s carry a karmic awareness at all times.

However, INFJ’s can also see through people’s weaknesses, their motivations, their dark sides and their 'secrets’ if you will, we watch carefully how they treat strangers with ill will, and notice if they treat their friends with kindness or if they are self serving. With that knowledge they back it up like a hard drive. They remember. How they use that information, is up to them. That choice, is what makes them grow or go backwards.

God forbid anybody come across an INFJ, hell or highwater because once you cross them - at best they will drop you like a hot pan and dissappear regardless of how long you’ve known them. At worst, be prepared for having all your insecurities and fears gutted and exposed. And they make sure you remember. They can dive deep into your heart to inspire you, but like that double edged sword they can cut straight into your heart with their words. They tell you the truth exactly as it is, whilst you are still grappling with the fact they knew how you felt all along, they expose all your ugliest motivations to air and for all to see. INFJ’s are adept at understanding the language of the human heart and what it wants and needs on an intangible level. They are expert emotional anthropologists. They understand boundaries and will not tell people how you feel, what is on your mind. This is because they know this information is precious, of course… until the shit hits the fan so to speak and then, they reveal everything about you. The ugly you. Every. Ugly. Detail.

They get under your skin and let loose slowly and methodically (yep, there’s that organization in action) anything they know about your weaknesses, everything they use turns it a kind of melodramatic piece of theatre relaying everything from your sexual indiscretions, faults, lack of listening skills and weaving it expertly by making sure every one of your emotional weaknesses are exploited. They hone in on your fears at the present moment and creatively exploit them for full effect, targeting fears, anxieties, guilt and expertly play them like a symphony. They understand the darkness in themselves and they recognize it in you.

Hell hath no fury like an INFJ scorned. Subtle, slow and insidioius is the scorned style of an INFJ. They can get creative with their scorn - they might have the dignity and coldness of a queen while they exploit your weaknesses. They personally tailor each and every remark for full emotional effect. They may tell you calmly and caustically why you cheated them and explain your insecurities in front of a large group of intimate friends whilst you sweat, hiding their motives behind dry wit and humour. They will adjust their level of scorn for whatever is appropriate for your character. If it’s a quick, derisive comment or a long confession of your insecurities - they will know which button to press to get to your heart. If it’s guilt they want to summon, they know what to say to make you feel it, they’ll remember an event or a whisper of an insecurity you have and they will bring it up. They remember the nuances in your dialogue, your emotional landscape - they remember your weaknesses and in an organized (judging) manner, categorically shoot each and every one of them down till they are satisfied you have sated their need for justice.

The scariness (or genius) of an INFJ however lies in the fact that they know how to adjust the temperature of their perceived hurt so that the other person feels the full effect of their remarks. Just as they can easily take the emotional temperature of a room just by walking into it, they know that getting completely angry is ineffective. So they manage their delivery intuitively, depending on your character so that the recipient has no room to retaliate - an INFJ instincitively knows if they expose a certain insecurity in you and say something softly, it is more effective than going completely a-wohl. They skirt over your anger and any issues they know will completely provoke you to not listening at all. They want to expose the truth, come hell or high water and if that means you feel reduced to something like a small child - totally exposed and a little humiliated, so be it. They will broach the topic carefully, throw in a caustic remark - you might not be able to retaliate to because the topic for you is so personal. It is completely tactical. They want to expose you remember, so they think carefully about the delivery of a remark and it’s intention before it comes out.

You know that secret you told them when you first met them with an open heart and open mind? If you’ve deeply betrayed them, they will remember it, bring it up and flippantly tell you they weren’t really listening, and they didn’t really care for it if that’s what it takes to hurt you.

The purpose? The truth of course. The phrase, 'Shed light on your sorry ass’, has never been more apt.

This is the darkness and shadow of an INFJ.

On one hand, the capacities described here can be unhealthy INFJ behavior. On the other hand, my perspective is that they aren’t unhealthy when one is dealing with, say, an abuser or a sociopath.

I’ve only ever had to take one person down using my capacity to systematically uncover and tell them (that person) the truth about the ugly underneath their mask. My primary goal in that process was to stop the person from harming me. My secondary goal was to do everything I could to ensure that the person would be unable to harm others like me in the future.

I know I succeeded in the primary goal, and I do believe I also succeeded in the secondary one. I have no regrets about acting as I did. I think we should use these capacities if they are ever warranted. I hope that it is never warranted - but if/when the need does occur, IMO it’s not necessarily a bad thing that we can be dangerous when truly crossed by people who do harm.

This doesn’t have so much to do with any of this other then the shadow emerging in an INFJ discussion point. I’ve been wanting to share this song with PerCs for a while, and was waiting for the “appropriate” time. This obviously is not that time. But I’m sick of waiting, don’t want to make a thread, and the shadow topic is sort of relevant, depending on how you choose to interpret Maynard’s lyrics. Please enjoy. I hope you can see the dots I see connecting this all.

Excellent post, Kermi. I know this about myself. I hate the fact that I “gather information” on people like I do, and “back it up” like you said, but I do. That’s why I have always worked on controlling my anger, because, if I get angry enough, and someone pushes me past the whole “glare at you, and become deathly quiet” phase, then I can destroy someone with words, and alienate that person that hurt me, or made me angry.

I do what I can to love people, but rather than backing up information (I do that anyways, just subconsciously) and using it against them I like to attack them on the mental level by asking questions (haven’t had to yet). Why did you do that? Does it feel good to do that? To behave like that? Why do you feel the need to behave this way? Does it make you feel better than an animal? Does it honestly make you feel like a better human being? Don’t you feel that you’re better than that? Or are you better than that?

If there is a physical retaliation (haven’t had one yet) I plan to do what I can to defend myself depending on how the situation is. If it is simply a fight, then I will only do surface damage, but if my life is threatened then I plan on doing damage, possibly internally.

I’m rarely confronted by people who were initially so honest after seeing me lash out. The person that usually confronts me tells me that I choose such harsh words, and that I succeed in helping them assume a feeling of lowliness, guilt, ugliness, or a whole list of other negative things. They usually seem to be saying this against their will or even in tears… I’ve just made the person miserable.

To be blunt: I recount and retell each and every last thing that was done and I highlight all the mistakes and disadvantages of such. Wether I use cursing, crude language, or any derogatory remark is irrelevant. The way I present what I say is made with as much coherence as I can use to arrange the information and the conclusion is just as painful to hear.

Some people get hurt more than others, but I don’t think anybody wants to hear things like these… Sometimes somebody shows that they don’t care if about what I’m saying when I’m lashing out and I can’t really see it in their face or movement, but they were affected in a powerful and irreversible way, and the pattern of their behaviors towards me seems almost permanently altered. They will avoid me A LOT. They will hesitate to say things to me face to face but would rather say things behind my back. I got what I wished for: to be left alone; but it sucks!

I can’t forget the times this happened. I can’t forget who told me this, or who didn’t tell me this but showed me how terrible what I’ve said was. I remember how they told me, and I remember sensing how their aura that radiated outward seems to be going inward instead.

This is why I’d much rather withdraw and leave when I’m angry.

Original notes:

However, INFJ’s can also see through people’s weaknesses, their motivations, their dark sides and their 'secrets’ if you will, we watch carefully how they treat strangers with ill will, and notice if they treat their friends with kindness or if they are self serving. With that knowledge they back it up like a hard drive. They remember. How they use that information, is up to them. That choice, is what makes them grow or go backwards.

God forbid anybody come across an INFJ, hell or highwater because once you cross them - at best they will drop you like a hot pan and dissappear regardless of how long you’ve known them. At worst, be prepared for having all your insecurities and fears gutted and exposed. And they make sure you remember. They can dive deep into your heart to inspire you, but like that double edged sword they can cut straight into your heart with their words. They tell you the truth exactly as it is, whilst you are still grappling with the fact they knew how you felt all along, they expose all your ugliest motivations to air and for all to see. INFJ’s are adept at understanding the language of the human heart and what it wants and needs on an intangible level. They are expert emotional anthropologists. They understand boundaries and will not tell people how you feel, what is on your mind. This is because they know this information is precious, of course… until the shit hits the fan so to speak and then, they reveal everything about you. The ugly you. Every. Ugly. Detail.

They get under your skin and let loose slowly and methodically (yep, there’s that organization in action) anything they know about your weaknesses, everything they use turns it a kind of melodramatic piece of theatre relaying everything from your sexual indiscretions, faults, lack of listening skills and weaving it expertly by making sure every one of your emotional weaknesses are exploited. They hone in on your fears at the present moment and creatively exploit them for full effect, targeting fears, anxieties, guilt and expertly play them like a symphony. They understand the darkness in themselves and they recognize it in you.

Hell hath no fury like an INFJ scorned. Subtle, slow and insidioius is the scorned style of an INFJ. They can get creative with their scorn - they might have the dignity and coldness of a queen while they exploit your weaknesses. They personally tailor each and every remark for full emotional effect. They may tell you calmly and caustically why you cheated them and explain your insecurities in front of a large group of intimate friends whilst you sweat, hiding their motives behind dry wit and humour. They will adjust their level of scorn for whatever is appropriate for your character. If it’s a quick, derisive comment or a long confession of your insecurities - they will know which button to press to get to your heart. If it’s guilt they want to summon, they know what to say to make you feel it, they’ll remember an event or a whisper of an insecurity you have and they will bring it up. They remember the nuances in your dialogue, your emotional landscape - they remember your weaknesses and in an organized (judging) manner, categorically shoot each and every one of them down till they are satisfied you have sated their need for justice.

The scariness (or genius) of an INFJ however lies in the fact that they know how to adjust the temperature of their perceived hurt so that the other person feels the full effect of their remarks. Just as they can easily take the emotional temperature of a room just by walking into it, they know that getting completely angry is ineffective. So they manage their delivery intuitively, depending on your character so that the recipient has no room to retaliate - an INFJ instincitively knows if they expose a certain insecurity in you and say something softly, it is more effective than going completely a-wohl. They skirt over your anger and any issues they know will completely provoke you to not listening at all. They want to expose the truth, come hell or high water and if that means you feel reduced to something like a small child - totally exposed and a little humiliated, so be it. They will broach the topic carefully, throw in a caustic remark - you might not be able to retaliate to because the topic for you is so personal. It is completely tactical. They want to expose you remember, so they think carefully about the delivery of a remark and it’s intention before it comes out.

You know that secret you told them when you first met them with an open heart and open mind? If you’ve deeply betrayed them, they will remember it, bring it up and flippantly tell you they weren’t really listening, and they didn’t really care for it if that’s what it takes to hurt you.

The purpose? The truth of course. The phrase, 'Shed light on your sorry ass’, has never been more apt.

This is the darkness and shadow of an INFJ.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Oh yes, I am familiar with this darkness all too well. Between a friend I had to leave for being too unstable and a sick INFJ mother, I’ve learned to actually train myself to deal with this hurt.

What these two have in common, for better or worse, is that almost nobody takes them seriously at this point. The fact of the matter is most INFJs dominated by their shadows are not well-liked people. Their destructive behavior will always be stopped sooner or later because nobody likes them. Well balanced and happy INFJs? Oh man, friends, lovers, and family like no other. Sick, shadow side ones? Disregarded by most people because they’re often seen as irrational.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I’ve only ever truly raged out once and it was much more physical than this thread describes, but it was very much the same pouring tirade of caution-to-the-wind hate. I still count myself incredibly lucky that the man at whom it was directed wasn’t where I thought he’d be because I don’t know what I’d have done if I’d found him.

But I still think he’d have deserved it, so I have no idea if you’d call it unhealthy or not. I do know that a part of me takes pride in the show of aggression. I think that’s something all INFJs have inside us, a beast-like desire to rip apart the things that hurt us. I think that’s why we bring up topics like this. We’re proud of the vicious parts of ourselves. We paint them as weakness, but see them see them as strength. And we want to show off that strength.

INFJ Traits, Social, Weirdness

Naturally inclined to help others

Natural diplomats because of the ability to see both sides

Egalitarianism and karma are very attractive ideas to INFJs

INFJs find it easy to make connections with others

INFJs need time alone to decompress and recharge

We can’t stop reading people even if we try

Champions for the oppressed and downtrodden

Often neglects to take care of themselves – putting others first

Prone to exhaustion due to the passion of their convictions

Gentle, caring, complex and highly intuitive

Self-Expression comes easier on paper than face to face

Artistic and creative

Struggle to adequately express ourselves

Has a deep need to help people “sort out their stuff”

INFJs are inclined to create order and practical systems in their outer world

INFJs operate within themselves on an intuitive basis

Knows things intuitively without knowing how

INFJs are easily affected by other people’s emotions

Have uncanny insight into people and situations

Prefer deep conversations to surface topics

Are protective of their inner selves

Geared to improve themselves through personal growth

Are rarely at complete peace with themselves

Has “little use” for social norms and routines

Always improving themselves and their surroundings

Always testing people to see if we can talk about things that really matter (usually can’t)

Can hold grudges for long periods of time.

We are information addicts, INFJs are the most well-read of all the personality types

Love’s variety in our romantic relationships

We rebel, but also want to be accepted

Losing/ Ending relationships is extremely painful

The whole INFJ existence is bound up in hiding and concealing our true nature

Have very high expectations of themselves

Tendency to take care of others needs while neglecting our own

Most likely of all types to cope with stress by seeing a therapist

Is a naturally nurturing, patient, devoted and protective

Hyper-aware of their surroundings

Are the least able of all the personality types to be in a long-term relationship

If the person we are talking to is too active, they will take a passive role, if the person we are talking to is too passive, we will take an active role.

Mysterious nature

INFJs know we are special and we revel in our rarity

Highly reserved, quiet, thoughtful, and almost above all else – introspective.

They make loving parents and usually have strong bonds with their children

Prefers careers where they can be creative and somewhat independent

Are very hard on themselves

It’s common for INFJs to intuitively assess their vicinity, and modify their behavior accordingly

To get an INFJ to open up, you must have some degree of depth about you and show that your view of things are not that dissimilar from their own

Always looking for something new, rarely satisfied with the mundane or routine

Not good at dealing with minutia or very detailed tasks in careers

Are highly cerebral and reflective

Wants to be alone about 75% of the time

Very sexual in private, but respectful and dignified in public

INFJs are quiet around you if; they don’t trust you, or they are completely comfortable with you.

Have a natural affinity for art, and may excel in the sciences, using their intuition

Are complex characters with a range of talents and abilities

Has a limited amount of social energy

INFJs are often mistaken for extroverts

Would rather spend time with our creations than with people

Keeps the majority of people in their lives at arm’s length

Because of the high demands of people close to them INFJs frequently withdraw into themselves shutting out the world for a few days

Loyal to those they trust

Wonders why most people are idiots

Does not take kindly to being ignored or interrupted

Natural activists for causes but not for political gain or power

Suffers from emotional overload because of their inherent nature to be “givers”

Has the clear insights into the motivations of others, for good and for evil

Highly empathic – Can feel and sense what others are feeling

Are natural counselors and healers

Hates liars

INFJs are the Archetypal “Loner” by choice

Are moved to champion causes and activities that serve the greater good

Has a strong sense of personal integrity

Natural healers

Are private and selective about sharing intimate thoughts and feelings

INFJs are far less serious inwardly than they appear outwardly

We like to have things orderly and systematic

Use both sides of the brain equally

How do I spot an INTJ/INFJ?

1. “Death-stare”. The phenomenon has been widely described. When they look at you, you feel as if they were inside your head.

2. They are organized, have their shit together (or at least try to make such impression). Usually dress well. Prefer plain clothing and simple haircuts.

3. In group settings they are the one that doesn’t say much and looks bored/confused/sad.

4. They have some kind of academic interest. Typical intellectuals.

5. Wry, dark sense of humour. Often use sarcasm, especially when talking about “big things”.

6. You will get a“prophet-vibe” from them. Like they were a wandering lunatic, living more inside their heads than in the present moment (although they share this trait with INFJs, but those have more of a “dreamy”, intimate look in their eyes, while an INTJ’s eyes are more analyzing).

7. Their FB profile has little to no activity, but may have an unusual profile/background pic.

8. They read while commuting.

9. Might come off as arrogant, cold. Accidentally say harsh things without even realizing it. Might be extremely judgemental (especially the immature ones).

10. Are very seclusive and private, you may know them for years and have no effin clue who they are and what they do.

11. They will ask open ended questions and will try to get to know who you are inside.

12. They make long pauses while speaking and you can almost feel that they are gathering thoughts. This might change if they open up and feel at ease with you.

What are each MBTI Type’s favourite conversation topics?

INTJ: Nietzche, the future

INTP: Science, what will they create

ENTJ: Their dreams, their idols, politics

ENTP: memes, penny-for-your-thoughts conversations

INFJ: morals, what they want to achieve

INFP: music, their wishes

ENFJ: politics, friendship, their dreams

ENFP: you will not get far before they change the topic to somet- OOH, A BUTTERFLY!!

ISTJ: politics, community, career

ISFJ: service, community

ESTJ: politics, career, bashing lefties

ESFJ: gossip, their kids, wine, cookies

ISTP: any tool or vehicle that they have

ISFP: art, music

ESTP: what they do for fun, parties, music

ESFP: dancing, relationships, parties, music

What things exhaust INFJs?

Parties-we don’t like crowded social engagements.

Sacrificing boundaries-We will do anything for someone we love, but we also have to put ourselves first.

Liars-We can sense a lie from a mile away

People-Negative people who drain our energy and find a problem with every solution

Small talk-We hate small talk, we want to get to know you, everything about you.

Being overstimulated-We are very sensitive to light and noise.

Not recharging-If we aren’t given time to ourselves, that can drain us quickly.

Being put on the spot-We like knowing things and when they will happen ahead of time.

What kind of first impression do INFJs usually make on others?

As an INFJ I can only speak to the feedback I have received from others, but when I reflect on their comments, I do understand how they arrived at their opinions. Some have said that from a distance I seem aloof, disinterested or intimidating, but when personal conversations begin they feel safe with me and open up easily, much to their surprise (I, of course, am not surprised at all). More intuitive people sense my ability to perceive their unspoken feelings and agendas, and respond differently based on their own emotional maturity. It can feel uncomfortable or threatening to some; mysterious to others; gratifying to those very much in need of acceptance; or genuine and altruistic to the few who are at peace with themselves. It depends on the others’ needs. I feel I am congruent personally and publicly, but because I have a God given ability to perceive the needs of others, and I genuinely care, I respond accordingly. Therefore, a group survey of opinions would reflect the diversity.

There are times, of course, when I am tired, overwhelmed with the negative dynamics of a situation or just lost in my own inner world, that I’m sure I really am aloof or disinterested. In general, however, I do sincerely care and want to engage in whatever way I can be of help with the emotional well being of others.

What is a telltale sign you are dealing with an INFJ?

Deep conversations, lighthearted personality, genuine concern, caring about and wanting to talk all about you, a little reserved while they try and figure you out.

Why can it be so hard for an INFJ to bond with another person?

The INFJs I know tend to reach a general conclusion about people, based on gut feel, within minutes of meeting them. They get put into broad buckets of, someone who is a false / bad / selfish person, people they have nothing in common with (vast majority) or sympathetic / nice people they can get along with.

If you get put in the nice people category bonding with and INFJ is pretty easy.

If you get put in the bad person category it is almost impossible as the INFJ will actively avoid you and wants nothing to do with you.

If you go into the middle category then the INFJ will tend to only have superficial contact with you. From a lack of decent interaction, and once an INFJ has categorised you, you have an unbelievable uphill struggle to form a bond with an INFJ. I have seen it done, especially where the INFJ has another reason they have to be in contact with the person, for example co-workers or their children are best friends - but it is not easy.

Which Color Personality Are You: Red, Blue, Green or Yellow?

YELLOW

The yellow personality is generally regarded as the sunniest personality. Often you will find them the life of the party. They are most of the time the loudest and most vocal of the four types of color personality. Some would regard them as the happy-go-lucky type who seems unable to take anything seriously. The yellow personality treats life as if it’s one big, continuous party. If faced with a stressful situation, the yellow person would seek out friends and drink it out. Most yellow personalities fear rejection most.

More interesting facts about the yellow personality include they can be very loyal and great team players, and are personable and friendly. They can be family oriented and animal lovers, plus environmentally conscious and love the outdoors. Yellow personalities do not like conflict and are more adept at being the peace maker. A yellow personality is creative, expressive, intuitive, and makes great volunteers. They dislike phony people.  

Yellow Personality Tendencies

Optimism

Enthusiasm

Makes good impressions

Verbally articulate

Likes to help others

Creates entertaining climate

Yellow Personality Ideal situation

Friendly warm environment

Freedom from control

Public recognition of ability

Opportunity to talk

Positive reinforcement

Enthusiastic response to ideas

Yellow Personality Weaknesses

Following through

Overestimating results

Misjudging capabilities

Talks too much

Acts impulsively

Jumps to conclusions

Over commits

Acts first, thinks second

Yellow Personality Needs others to provide

Follow through on details

Focus on tasks

Logical approach

Yellow Personality Personal growth area

Time awareness

Objectivity in decision making

RED

The red personality is generally considered the “dominating personality”. These are the types of person who demands that things be done their way and right now. They sometimes have low tolerance for undisciplined and devil-may-care attitude which oftentimes put them at odds with the yellow personality. If faced with a stressful situation the red personality would generally seek out strenuous activities like running or boxing to vent out his or her frustrations. Most reds fear failure.

More interesting fact about the red personality includes their desire to win, competitive, and a confident personality. Even though the red personality is competitive, they can also be insecure which gives a need for approval from others and drives their need to win. They can be selfish, and not a good team player, because they would rather be in the spotlight which makes them sometimes selfish.

 Red personality Tendencies

Getting immediate results

Making quick decisions

Persistence

Solving problems

Taking charge

Looking self reliant

Accepting challenges

Red Personality Ideal situation

New varied activities

Opportunity to really get things done

Continual challenges, multi-tasker

Difficult assignments

Freedom to act from their instinct

Control over the situations

Direct answers from others, no innuendoes

Red Personality Weaknesses

Insensitivity towards others

Impatient

Overlook risks

Inflexibility, demanding of others

Talks too much

Inattentive to details at times

Resenting of restrictions

Red Personality Needs others to provide

Attention to routine tasks

Caution

Focus on details and facts

Red Personality Personal growth area

Greater patience

Sensitivity to others’ needs

Flexibility

GREEN

The green personality is generally referred to as the calm personality. They don’t easily get frazzled and are the epitome of calmness even in most stressful situations. To them also falls the role of mediator when faced with sticky situations. When stressed, the green’s approach is to sleep it off. The green personality tries his/her best to maintain harmony in all types of situation. Because of the green’s inability to say no, people oftentimes take advantage of them.

The green personality also has the following traits. They are known to be very calculating and logical in their thinking which also means they do not make snap decisions and think everything through because of their love of analyzing every question and every situation. They are more scientific in their thinking, preferring facts over intuition of faith based answers. This can make the green personality rather skeptical of people and those with ulterior motives. They need a precise plan to follow, and they are not spontaneous, and do not like surprises. They can also be perfectionist and sometimes end up being emotionally detached.

Green Personality Tendencies

Supportive

Agreeable

Loyal

Self control

Consistent

Good listener

Opportunity to develop personal relationships

Green Personality Ideal situation

Sincere appreciation by others

Minimal conflict between people

Security

Acknowledgement of work by others

Limited territory

Traditional procedures

Opportunity to develop personal relationships

Green Personality Weaknesses

Resist change

Trouble making deadlines

Overly lenient with people

Procrastinates

Indecisive

Holds grudges

Overly possessive

Lacks initiative

Green Personality Needs others to provide

Push to try new challenges

Help in solving difficult problems

Initiative and accepting change

Green Personality Personal growth area

Facing confrontation and dealing with it

Moving at a faster pace and initiating

BLUE

The blue personality type is seen as the perfectionists. They are the ones who would generally examine the smallest details of every situation and fret about each one of them. The blue personality oftentimes appears unemotional and doesn’t want to be touched. The greatest fear of a blue person is to be criticized.

Interestingly, other studies show that the blue personalities can be aloof, forgetful and fun loving. They live for the moment and are the exact opposite of the green personality.

Blue PersonalityTendencies

Orderliness

Conscientious

Disciplined

Precise

Thorough

Diplomatic with people

Analytical

Blue Personality Ideal situation

Being able to concentrate on detail

Opportunities to critique

Stable surroundings and procedures

Exact job description, expectations

Opportunities for “careful” planning

Sufficient time to do things right

Opportunities for reassurance from authority

Blue Personality Weaknesses

Indecisive (looking at all data)

Get bogged down in details

Rigid on the how-to’s

Avoids controversy

Low self esteem

Hesitant to try new things

Sensitive to criticism

Can be pessimistic

Blue Personality Needs others to provide

Quick decision making

Optimism

Help in persuading others

Blue Personality Personal growth area

Be more open with their feelings

Be more optimistic

Color Personality Conclusion

This is not an exact science and many people can be different than what their color personality describes. Though some people are really described well with their color personalities, other people do not resemble their color personalities. Check out the following sources for more information, because this type of personality test can be very interesting. If you find you are someone that identifies with a certain color, these tests can be very helpful.

INFJs: what advice can you give a younger INFJ?

My psychologist identified me as leaning INFJ about 20 years ago but I didn’t give it much thought then. I’ve been a “woke” INFJ for ten years as a result of rediscovering the MBTI concept during a difficult time. I wish I hadn’t waited so long as the insights I’ve gained about my own personality and those close to me would have saved a lot of heartache and anguish

Here’s what I’ve learned about myself through the years that I’m reasonably sure apply to many other INFJs too:

You have unique insights. They are real. The unusual internal wiring that makes you an INFJ lets you connect the dots easier. And you see more dots. Some people don’t see any dots or recognize patterns and are more than happy to point out the “error” of your observations. So be it. You’re job is to figure out what “feels” right and should be pursued, what can be put on the back burner awaiting more information, and what can be dumped because after thinking about it you realize your conclusions were probably wrong. It happens.

You will be lonely. INFJs can be unconventional because we act on information most others don’t have. We usually have a broad range of knowledge and can come across as “know-it-alls.” We can sometimes alarm people with our passion. We can start feeling down because we don’t understand how people can be so cruel to one another. Or so stupid. Our faith in humanity can swing wildly from hour to hour. We can do the crowd thing for awhile and need to leave. We usually hate small talk on the phone and are often the worst party planners in the world.

We drive ourselves and others mad to “get things right” and to give a damn about something besides the most trivial things in life. We are usually disappointed—in others and ourselves. It’s not that people don’t like being around us, it’s that we usually think people don’t WANT to be around us. So we hunker down and keep to ourselves.

That’s what can make relationships difficult sometimes. You will need to tap into the best part of being an INFJ—helping people—to keep you from being lonely. I volunteer at a homeless center. I’m active in the US Coast Guard Auxiliary. I write answers on Quora!

You will be able to do a lot of stuff. Some of it well. Most people will be surprised. Most INFJs I know are curious, versatile people. For example, I’ve written two novels, one has been self-published. I play jazz piano and can also play the tuba. I’m conversational in Spanish and know some Swedish. I can hold up my end of a conversation ranging from cosmology to dog grooming. I can talk Southern Country Gospel with a homeless man and discuss the latest power adders for high performance race cars with the editor of a national racing magazine. I did both last week. I sail the Great Lakes in my own boat. I like to cook. I have restored or built six houses. I can plumb bathrooms from scratch, do basic electrical work and restore old wood moulding. I have a four-year certificate in theology. I can paint and draw.

At this point you probably think I’m quite the braggart. That’s not why I’m listing these abilities. The reason is that I can do NONE of these things proficiently. Except sailing–I’m a very good sailor! I suspect that most INFJs who have been around for several decades can make a similar list. Our curiosity and drive to know how something works can lead us to some amazing discoveries and bring us into contact with some fascinating people. Freeing yourself to explore and to try new things without having the burden of having to perform in public or to even be terribly proficient at any of them can lead us to a very interesting life!

You will second guess yourself. Constantly. You are your own worst critic. If you’ve ever had second thoughts about how you came across after submitting a report or talking to someone about something important, remember:

Your second guesses are usually wrong. Trust your intuition!

You may struggle in relationships. INFJs are not easy people to be around sometimes. We can be quirky, sometimes anti-social and have a tendency to tell folks how to build a clock when they ask for the time. We can fret constantly about the state of humanity, when our partner just wants to have a hamburger and talk about movies. The saving grace is that we love hard! When we’ve found someone we can be ourselves with, someone who accepts us, if not understands us, we’re there for the long-haul. The people in your life who get that will adore you!

Finally, strive to know yourself better. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Don’t forget to have fun. Don’t worry so much about what other people may be thinking about you—chances are they aren’t thinking anything! And above all, be kind to yourself!

What are INFJs really good at?

As an INFJ…

I can read people’s energies immediately upon meeting them or engaging with them. I pick up on their vibes, and kind of almost “read their aura” without challenge.

I have a hyperactive brain, and I have great trouble with slowing it down or “turning it off.” As a result, I worry far too much!

I am very interested in human emotion and human psychology. I thoroughly enjoy figuring people out, and helping them to figure them selves out. As much as I dislike people and work hard to avoid them, I also enjoy engaging with them in order to study them, all the same.

I care very deeply for those who are closest to me. I embrace quality over quantity in my social relationships, and I cherish strong emotional connections.

I quickly become bored with and/or irritated by meaningless chit-chat and “tabloid talk.” I do not care to socialize unless I’m either able to engage in friendly debate about social or political topics, or am able to engage in deep meaningful conversation about intellectually or creatively-stimulating topics.

I tend to think that everything is about me, but ONLY when “everything” is negative. I hate being in the spotlight, but I will drag myself into it when i feel as though someone else’s misfortune might somehow be my fault. Usually the issue in question has nothing to do with me, and I end up worrying for no reason (story of my life).

I enjoy playing “counselor” or “therapist” for others. I am very good at examining and solving other people’s problems, while I constantly neglect to examine and solve my own!

I have a STRONG need for creativity. I need to express myself through art in various forms. When I deprive myself of artistic expression I retreat, become depressed, and ultimately shame and berate myself. Verbal communication has always been much more of a task for me than artistic communication has been.

I become easily frustrated when I attempt to do something without success on the first or second try. I am highly perfectionist at the core, and I feel as though I should be able to master whatever I attempt. -no room for error-

I become obsessed with things out of nowhere, and spend much of my time researching my topic of interest. However, I soon get bored and move on to another topic just as quickly as the one before, about which I also obsess..

I always assume that others are judging or questioning me. I am very self-conscious, especially when it comes to decision-making. I always feel like I’m misunderstood and judged by a large majority of people about how I choose to live and interact.

Loud noises bother and overwhelm me, as do large crowds of obnoxious [drunk] people. My energy drains so quickly around any kind of volume of people or of sound. I need peace and quiet in order to be productive or to enjoy myself.

I am able to adapt to, and find common ground with, all different kinds of people - no matter age, race, gender, sexual orientation, political or religious views, etc. I love relating to and finding common ground with others, especially those who seem quite different from me.

I have always preferred the company of those who are significantly older than I. This was quite the case from a very early age, and has yet to change in adulthood.

Personality and emotional connection have ALWAYS been the roots of my attraction to the opposite sex, rather than physical appearance and/or financial status.

I would much rather receive a note, poem, or drawing from a loved one rather than a material/store-bought gift with a high price tag.

I am attracted to modesty and a humanitarian nature. I am attracted to selflessness, artistic ability, an open mind, and a tendency to forgive and lack judgment.

I am always seeking approval from my loved ones and, more so as a child, my peers. I have always felt very much like an alien when it comes to the ways that I function and view the world. I am a loner by nature, and as I age, I tend to appreciate and respect that aspect of myself more and more.

I struggle with the challenges of being a “highly sensitive person,” which tends to come with substance abuse issues, depression, and anxiety, to name a few. I feel and absorb other people’s emotions and fail regularly to protect myself from them. I am constantly drained and overloaded by a combination of the emotions of others and my internal thoughts.

I expect for others to understand when I retreat and become reclusive, yet rarely they do. I have a bad habit of isolating myself during times of immense stress. It typically does not benefit me in many ways to do this, yet I always think that it will.

I procrastinate and often put off my “to'do list” or responsibilities due to feeling bogged down by mundane tasks. I am always searching for the bigger picture, and feel as though I need instant gratification without applying necessary steps and work.

Do INFJs know that they are different?

I think on some fundamental level, yes. I think this is why after getting this “diagnosis” and how rare it is, it is often a huge relief. That is, its not that there’s anything fundamentally wrong with INFJs, its just that they process things in a very unusual manner to most other people. 

This rarity then prompts INFJs to find other like-minded people to share experiences, opinions and thoughts. Online communities like this also have the bonus of doing everything in written form which is a strength of many INFJs. 

After wondering for so long what is wrong with them, to find that there’s a whole bunch of people who think like you is very comforting and allows for understanding, self-improvement (which INFJs are big on) and commonality of thoughts. 

Although, on many occasions they enjoy being the odd one out, every now and then its nice to not have to stick out like a sore thumb and just be able to be themselves. Those that make an effort to understand INFJs are treated like gold because they know that people like that; people who take the time to get to know them and genuinely want to do so, are few and far between. 

INFJ Strengths

•Creative – Combining a vivid imagination with a strong sense of compassion, INFJs use their creativity to resolve not technical challenges, but human ones. People with the INFJ personality type enjoy finding the perfect solution for someone they care about, and this strength makes them excellent counsellors and advisors.

•Insightful – Seeing through dishonesty and disingenuous motives, INFJs step past manipulation and sales tactics and into a more honest discussion. INFJs see how people and events are connected, and are able to use that insight to get to the heart of the matter.

•Inspiring and Convincing – Speaking in human terms, not technical, INFJs have a fluid, inspirational writing style that appeals to the inner idealist in their audience. INFJs can even be astonishingly good orators, speaking with warmth and passion, if they are proud of what they are speaking for.

•Decisive – Their creativity, insight and inspiration are able to have a real impact on the world, as INFJs are able to follow through on their ideas with conviction, willpower, and the planning necessary to see complex projects through to the end. INFJs don’t just see the way things ought to be, they act on those insights.

•Determined and Passionate – When INFJs come to believe that something is important, they pursue that goal with a conviction and energy that can catch even their friends and loved ones off guard. INFJs will rock the boat if they have to, something not everyone likes to see, but their passion for their chosen cause is an inseparable part of their personality.

•Altruistic – These strengths are used for good. INFJs have strong beliefs and take the actions that they do not because they are trying to advance themselves, but because they are trying to advance an idea that they truly believe will make the world a better place.

INFJ Weaknesses

•Sensitive – When someone challenges or criticizes INFJs’ principles or values, they are likely to receive an alarmingly strong response. People with the INFJ personality type are highly vulnerable to criticism and conflict, and questioning their motives is the quickest way to their bad side.

•Extremely Private – INFJs tend to present themselves as the culmination of an idea. This is partly because they believe in this idea, but also because INFJs are extremely private when it comes to their personal lives, using this image to keep themselves from having to truly open up, even to close friends. Trusting a new friend can be even more challenging for INFJs.

•Perfectionistic – INFJs are all but defined by their pursuit of ideals. While this is a wonderful quality in many ways, an ideal situation is not always possible – in politics, in business, in romance – and INFJs too often drop or ignore healthy and productive situations and relationships, always believing there might be a better option down the road.

•Always Need to Have a Cause – INFJs get so caught up in the passion of their pursuits that any of the cumbersome administrative or maintenance work that comes between them and the ideal they see on the horizon is deeply unwelcome. INFJs like to know that they are taking concrete steps towards their goals, and if routine tasks feel like they are getting in the way, or worse yet, there is no goal at all, they will feel restless and disappointed.

•Can Burn Out Easily – Their passion, poor patience for routine maintenance, tendency to present themselves as an ideal, and extreme privacy tend to leave INFJs with few options for letting off steam. People with this personality type are likely to exhaust themselves in short order if they don’t find a way to balance their ideals with the realities of day-to-day living.

INFJ vs INFP

Similarities:

Both are private. Both are idealists. Both can be perfectionists. Both are insightful, analytical, logical, and meticulous. And both are intuitives, preferring the abstract over black and white.

The biggest difference?

INFP is highly in tune with their own feelings 

INFJ is usually oblivious to theirs

INFP’s dominant function is Fi (their own feelings), but INFJ doesn’t even have Fi in their stack. (Same for ISFJ.) Instead, their “F” is extroverted (Fe) — which is other people.

INFP has ever-expanding ideas …inspired by feelings 

INFJ has ever-narrowing “insights” … about people

it’s the INFP who speaks fluent “ideas and dreams”

INFP is inspiration, with insight

INFJ is insight, with inspiration

At their worst:

INFP replays the past to relive emotions, and is sensitive (not critical)

INFJ gets lost in “white noise” / “nothingness,” and is critical (not sensitive)

When desperate:

INFP obliterates their creativity with convention (ending up soul-crushed)

INFJ obliterates their thinking with hedonistic indulgences (ending up ill)

Their insecurity / fear (or: the biggest insult):

INFP — “you’re not special,” “you’re too sensitive/naïve/spaced out”

INFJ — “your insights aren’t meaningful,” or “your life is meaningless”

INFP feels pride from being unique and being seen that way

INFJ feels pain from not being understood or connecting with others

INFJ biggest value isn’t “authenticity” but rather “universal meaning.” They are merely a vessel, and their F is focused on others, not self (their thoughts and insights — not feelings — are what’s focused internally, and sometimes INFJs are utterly blind to their own emotions.)

As Heidi Priebe wrote,

“Because INFPs tend to be highly creative and individualistic, most of them have never met another person quite like themselves (including other INFPs). For this reason, they find it fitting that their type is 1% of the population — they think this explains their individuality, when in reality it is their introverted feeling that sets them apart.”

Deepest desire:

INFJs want universal insight on other people (INFP doesn’t reallycare)

INFP wants unique expression of self (INFJ doesn’t really care)

Infj

Sensitive, empathic, and insightful, you care deeply about people, wanting to accommodate them on the one hand, and having strong visions that you desperately want to turn into reality on the other. Often preoccupied with mulling over your personal thoughts in your own head, others are likely to describe you as tolerant, courteous, and appreciative, but also a bit remote and dreamy. Thoughtful and caring, you have a well-developed facility for putting yourself in another person’s place and an instinctive understanding of how people work. Though you tend to spend considerable time fantasizing about how society could be improved, you typically refrain from arguing passionately in favor of your solutions. Instead, you prefer to influence others by gently letting them know how their individual contributions would be invaluable in the greater scheme of things.

What are tell-tale signs you are an INFJ?

19 Signs That You’re an INFJ

1. From a young age, you felt different from the people around you

When you were young, you had plenty of friends but you never felt like you truly fit in. Sometimes you faked being more like them so they would accept you, but deep inside you felt that it’s not right.

2. You want to know what’s really going on in people’s lives

Not just trivial stuff like what they did this weekend or what they bought on their latest shopping trip. You want to dig deep and get at the things that no one else sees. What does the person in front of you really think? How does this person really feel? The fake facade they put up for other people doesn’t fool you.

3. Plans

You feel more comfortable having a loose plan for things than you do completely winging it.

4. You’re social, but you are not really social

You can be both incredibly shy, quiet, and withdrawn, as well as charming, fun, and hilarious. It’s all about the situation, your mood, and energy levels, and most important, the people you’re with.

5. How you handle problems

When someone comes to you with a problem, you usually don’t give them advice or your opinion unless they ask. Instead, you ask them questions to help them better understand the situation and their own feelings about it. Sometimes you tell a story of a time when something similar happened to you, in the hope that they’ll draw their own lesson. You feel like you can usually see the path they should take, but you don’t want them to do it just because you told them to. You want it to be their decision.

6. There are limits to your introversion

You are an introvert and you like alone time, but you can’t be alone for too long. Eventually you need to reunite with your people. “Your people” are a handful of good friends who truly get you. It can be just one person as well. Deep conversations with these people are priceless, and hanging out with them can actually boost your energy.

7. The door slam

You’ve been known to suddenly cut people out of your life when they’ve hurt you one too many times. It’s not that you enjoy cutting people out, rather, you do this simply to protect yourself. Even though you may look like you have it together on the outside, you’re extremely sensitive inwardly, and you’re especially sensitive to other people’s words and actions.

8. You can be a people-pleaser

Sometimes you try so hard to make other people happy that you forget to make yourself happy.

9. Empathy

You often feel like you see precisely what someone else is feeling, and you believe you know what they need deep down. You’re not always right, but you tend to be more perceptive than most.

10. You have a destiny

You feel like you’re destined for so much more than just dragging yourself to your 9-5 job to pay the bills. You want to help people and change the world & not just get a paycheck. The problem is you either don’t know what your “glorious purpose” is, or you have an inkling, but you don’t know how to achieve it.

11. Always striving

You almost always have this sinking feeling like you could be doing better with your life. This results in you constantly have secret self-improvement projects going on, like learning how to cook healthy meals, setting better boundaries, or getting better at articulating yourself. Sometimes you push yourself too hard as you attempt to achieve your “perfect” life.

12. Your defence mechanism

Sometimes you turn to people-pleasing to protect yourself. You’re sensitive, so you can get really bothered when someone criticizes you or is disappointed in you. They can’t criticize you if you make them happy.

13. You sense things

You often immediately sense the mood of a room when you walk into it. Likewise, you often absorb the feelings of the people around you. If they’re excited, you get excited. If they’re anxious, you get anxious, too. You tend to gravitate toward calm, centered people so you don’t have to deal with as much emotional garbage.

14. Nothing but class

You’re drawn to high-quality things, like good food, nice clothes, and anything else that has good craftsmanship. As much as you hate to admit it, the way things look is important to you. You like being surrounded by beauty, and you tend to have sophisticated, refined tastes. But you’re a minimalist at heart. You’d rather have one or two really nice shirts than ten mediocre ones.

15. Your secret feelings

You care deeply about the people in your life, but they’ll probably never know just how much you care, because you keep your feelings mostly to yourself. You can have trouble articulating your emotions, even though you feel them intensely.

16. You care a lot

You’re usually thoughtful, conscientious, and considerate. Other people who are not as conscientious can seem callous and even cruel.

17. Books

You love learning, especially when it comes to psychology, self-improvement, spirituality, and certain sciences.

18. Your head is way beyond the clouds

When everyone else is gossiping, discussing celebs, or talking about other trivial things, you often find yourself thinking about outer space, time travel, human nature, the meaning of life, and other more epic topics like entrepreneurship. You rarely try to steer the conversation in that direction, though, because you don’t think other people will be interested.

19. You didn’t ask to be like this

Other people see you as wise, insightful, and almost spiritual. They often come to you for advice and emotional support. You relish your role as the “wise one,” and you like being needed. But sometimes it becomes too much. You’re an introvert, for crying out loud, and sometimes you just wish everyone would solve their own problems and leave you alone for a while.

Source:@6ejt

To which MBTI type are INFJs drawn to?

INFJs (NiFe) are a rare breed of individuals who possess both the insatiable thirst to know the unknowable and a level of compassion arguably only rivaled by a SiFe or FeSi. This explains why INFJs are referred to as the best thinkers among the feelers of the spectrum. When healthy, they can temper their emotions with logic and sound reasoning.

There’s a flip side to this, however. When left unchecked, INFJs tend to hold out judgment on people because their extraverted feeling (Fe) tells their introverted intuition (Ni) that “there are more than meets the eye.” This makes INFJs unwitting lovers of enigmatic people. They are easily drawn to people from extreme opposites: Those who make them better, and those who frustrate them. Whether or not they’d admit, they simply love reading people who aren’t easy to understand—or even worse, those who don’t wish to be understood.

Generally, INFJs are attracted to people who:

Can challenge their values and beliefs and encourage them to evaluate their emotions and decisions (ENTPs -> NeTi)

Are notoriously as introverted and private—if not more—as them, but leaps and bounds harder to read (INTJs -> NiTe)

Are generally considered dorky when with the INFJs (INTPs -> TiNe)

Look and view life with positivity and brimming optimism seen in the opening of any vivacious musical film (ENFPs -> NeFi)

Share the same values and tendencies as them (fellow INFJs -> NiFe)