She was resolved, that much she knew. It had been too long, and she’d procrastinated far too much, and now she was in a mire that she was going to have to actively work to get herself out of. Anonymous sex and a hollow deep inside her, the kind that she had only been feeding, a hungry vacuum that just wanted more despair, more frustration, and more wilful denial.
At least she could work on that last. Stop saying no to it. Finally say yes. Or at least start with a maybe. That would be a step in the right direction.
The city looked inviting, but it always did. The sunrise over the skyline was warm, tinging everything with the heat of orange, just as the cool of the night was washing away like the tide. Somewhere out there would be what she wanted, what she needed. Somewhere out there, amid the glittering blink of each slowly wakening constellation of commuter’s windows, every one lighting up as alarms went off, was the one for her.
She reckoned he’d be a working man, the kind that was up early, probably earlier than most. To run, maybe. Or just to read the paper at his leisure. She wanted to be there, awake with him, doing the things he’d told her to do, the things they’d agreed on. She wanted to surrender herself to commitment, lose herself in monogamy. Anonymous frivolity, a nonchalant attitude to sex and eroticism, was just making her tired.
She didn’t want to be tired any more. She was going to find him, and she wasn’t going to take her time doing it. Resolution at dawn, just as final as pistols. Only this was the end of the beginning, rather than that heavy tome slamming down, for Death to ink in the ledger.
if you’re not big on cutout christmas cookies, you can always impart some festive and colorful fun onto your baked goods with a readily-curated sprinkle mix! these three are on the edge of wintry fun, perfect for any holiday party!
YAY it’s the day after thanksgiving! aka black friday, aka the unofficial start to the holiday season!! i just love this time of year <3
if you’re shopping etsy today be sure to look out for special deals throughout the weekend, but i also encourage you to consider REI’s #optoutside campaign today – get out and enjoy the world and nature however you can! i know i will be doing this :)
spice up your thanksgiving table and spark some conversations with super-special jams and jellies from lemonbird, whose flavor combinations never cease to surprise.
