Moonlight on the River

Summary:songfic inspired by “Moonlight on the River “by Mac Demarco. November 1981.

Pairing:Sirius Black x Male Reader

Key:(Y/N)- your name, (L/N)- last name

Word Count:1300

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

I’d say, see you next time, if I thought there were a next time
Easy conversation, ain’t exactly where we’re at
It’s so strange, deciding, how I feel about you
It ain’t like, I ain’t used, to going on without you
I’m home, with moonlight on the river, saying my goodbyes
I’m home, there’s moonlight on the river, everybody dies
I’m home, with moonlight on the river, saying my goodbyes
I’m home, there’s moonlight on the river, everybody dies

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

The cold autumn night nipped at your nose as you searched. You hadn’t seen Sirius in two days and you were getting worried. Remus was resting as it was your turn to search. You felt dumb for letting him leave that night. You weren’t even sure what he was doing, rumors had started that he was the one who did it. It made your head spin as you cast a small warming spell on your hands, it was so cold. 

You reached your door coming back from a fruitless mission to find him, but you noticed a hooded figure waiting at the door. As you got closer you noticed it was Sirius’s sleep deprived face, he looked like he hadn’t slept in the whole 72 hours since he left that morning. Your chest hurt as you approached him, the soft streetlight reflected on his face, stubble sat on his face unshaved, his hair greasy and unkept. It was hard to control yourself, you wanted to scream and shout at him for abandoning you until your voice was lost, yet you wanted to hug and kiss his face softly and cry.

He turned towards you, finally noticing you walking towards. He looked as if he wasn’t there anymore. He wasn’t your Sirius anymore. The man who stood in front of you was a shell of his former self. You almost failed to see the man you knew behind it. It felt too long ago that he was smiling, his hair blowing in the late summer air. 

He was trying to say something to you, but your ears were ringing. You couldn’t focus on the words coming from his lips as you stared at them. He was going on about Wormtail, Prongs, secrets, how little time was left and explosions , but all your mind did was wonder to seeing him holding little Harry in his arms making little paper figures dance in the air. You took a step forward, trying to get a better look at who he had become. Maybe he was always this, you thought to yourself. How could you have not seen it? 

As if it was an open, warm invitation, Sirius also took a step forward, closing the gap between you, his eyes searching for anything in yours. Anything that could make him believe you trusted him. 

“Please don’t come any closer.” You said softly, your voices wavering. Your mind was on an unsteady balance, teetering on the end of caution. You crossed your arms, crawling into yourself. He looked hurt by this. 

“You have to trust me.” He said as if he hadn’t been on the run since that night. He looked guilty enough. He looked terrible. You felt awful inside unable to trust the man who held you so sweetly in his arms not even a week ago. 

“Did you-” You choked out as your eyes burned. It wasn’t really a question and Sirius had no real answer for it either. He just stood in silence, turning his back away from you. He couldn’t bear to look at you. You both knew what this was. You could feel your throat straining as you tried your best to repress a sob. 

“I did something bad. I know.” He admitted guiltily, his eyes failing to meet you. “Something truly awful.” He laughed sadly. His shoulders trembled as he spoke to you. “Something I know you can never forgive me for.” Your eyes widen. 

“Sirius, you’re scaring me.” You replied shakily, taking a step back. His voice ripped through his throat as he spoke like he’d been screaming for days. 

“Please believe I didn’t mean for it to get here.” He cried out desperately. Couldn’t he just leave you out of something for once. Couldn’t he just die with his friends? Why did he have to be here? Now? 

“He was our friend. They were our friends, Sirius.” You were horrified, he killed your friends. You started taking a few steps away from him, he followed the steps until you were backed up against your front door. 

“Please believe me.” He begged you, his eyes lit up by the soft streetlight. His facial expressions were desperate for you to say anything he could cling to. He was scared.

“I don’t know w-what to believe.” Tears were freely falling down your face, your throat burned as you spoke, closing and opening as you sobbed, scared. 

You screamed for Remus, praying he could hear you. Please don’t be asleep, you thought. You had found Sirius and yet now confronted with him. You were scared. You screamed once more trying to get anyone’s attention. Anyone. 

“I’m sorry I did this to you.” He choked out, you looked into his eyes, tears falling down his cheeks. You heard people apparating around you as Sirius graced your memory with one more sad smile. The last sad smile. 

“I love you, (Y/N). I hope you can trust me again one day, my dear.” That last thing he said to you, you screamed bloody murder as he got dragged away from you by aurors, but he just let it happen. 

“Sirius Black was arrested on suspicion of use in black magic and the betrayal leading to murder of one James and Lily Potter who died earlier this week. The Boy who Lived’s location is yet to be revealed if it ever will. Later Sirius Black was found at the residence of his former (Y/N) (L/N) and known lycanthrope Remus Lupin. They-“ Your stomach felt ill as Remus read the paper to you, you couldn’t bring yourself to even look at it yet. 

“Did they have to mention my lycanthropy?” Remus sighed as he read the news. You were still in shock, the cuppa in your hands shaking slightly as you listened. 

“Black will be sent to Azkaban without trial being charged for misuse of magic, an account of conspiracy against the ministry and one account of first degree murder for the case of three victims…” Remus fell silent at the end, closing the pages of news. “It’s not that interesting anyway. That was all they had on him. The rest is about Harry.” 

“Harry…” You said, looking at your uneaten toast. Your stomach curled further thinking about that poor boy. You missed him. You were supposed to have a birthday party today, Sirius’s birthday. Tears started to fall down your face as you stared harder at your toast. His gift was still underneath your bed. It felt trivial to cry over something like this, thinking about your favourite person in a cold cell on his birthday. The person who murdered and betrayed your other favourite people. 

Remus looked like he was barely holding it together either, holding most of himself together trying to help you. You heard a soft tremble of sobs coming from the other side of the breakfast nook. You looked up at him, his head down as tears fell onto the pages of the Daily Prophet. 

“He really can’t stay out of trouble.” He said it as if Sirius got caught sneaking cigarettes into the school again. “On his birthday no less. He’s always been for the drama. That bastard.” Remus looked up to meet your eyes, his face distorted in anger and sadness. You couldn’t help crying too, the walls you both put up came crashing down. 

Remus was suddenly on the floor in front of you, his head in your lap as he cried violently. You pulled his head up to look at you, wiping the tears on his face, bringing yourself down to him as you hugged him. You buried your face in his shoulder, him doing the same as you both cried until you couldn’t do anything, but tremble in each other’s arms. The last two Marauders, left alone together.

Summary: (request) Sirius sneaking his boyfriend into Grimmauld Place for some sneaky sexy times with the added twist of pain.

Pairing: Sirius Black x Male Reader

Word Count: 2777

Key: (Y/N)- your name.

Warnings: Very much nsfw, includes post-nut SOBBING (I’m sorry, Sirius) as well mentions of abuse if you squint. Happy ending I swear.

A/N: Come get your juice lol. I’m sorry I haven’t been writing that much, but I got an apartment! So I’m officially moving out on Monday! I hope I’ll be able to make another fic before school starts, please do send in some requests for the reserves pFfft

You were pushed down unexpectedly into the bushes as the door was answered. You rubbed your side as you kept an ear out for your boyfriend who knocked on his own door. You think he’s forgotten the keys at your place.

“Mother.” You heard Sirius say a little too cheery, but his usual sarcastic manner, earning what you hoped was a small smack against the head and a sigh followed by the click clack of small heels against wood. You then felt an arm grab you, pulling you fully up on your feet, you opened your mouth to stay something, but “SH.” He whispered loudly and you frowned, getting a guide in fast motion through the house and up the stairs. He stopped you midway through climbing to the second floor, casting a darkness spell that covered you both in the corner. You cursed yourself when you remembered James’ offer for the invisibility cloak. Just as you cursed in your mind, you both saw Orion Black pass you as though you were nothing more than flies on the wall. You thanked old wizard families and their lack of electricity.

You heard Sirius audibly sigh as he walked down the stairs rather than up, looking dressed for dinner. You would’ve sighed if it weren’t for your immediate view into the drawing room, Sirius’s little face glowing in the candle light below. He threw a glance your way, a quick shut it, but you were sure to mention his adorable little cheeks the next time you could. Thoughts interrupted by your boyfriend’s hand once more you were dragged across the next flight of stairs, this emergency being the short dark haired boy right in front of you. You could’ve sworn you saw his lungs inhaling ready to shout, but he just sighed, put his head down and squeezed past both of you and down the stairs. “I don’t-“ “SH.” Sirius repeated once more, pulling you up the last flight of stairs and to the fourth floor. You were both out of breath and smiling ear to ear. The door to Sirius’s room brandished with a stop sign you’re sure he stole. How he was allowed to keep it up was not to your knowledge, but you entered.

You had never been in his room and it was not what you imagined. The amount of red and gold in the room almost made you want to burn your eyes with the added laundry pile that you suspected was untouched by the house elves for whatever Sirius logic he had behind it. “Wow. It’s so…” “Chic? Fantastic?” “Gryffindor.” He deadpanned and stared at you, rolling his eyes. He fell back into a black armchair that was covered in a Gryffindor blanket, you don’t even know how he got it or if the school even sold those. He patted the armchair next to him which wasn’t as decorated, dawning a simple red throw over. You too collapsed onto the chair, sinking into the soft, definitely ridiculously expensive pillows. Now what, you thought. You had thought about what you were going to do. You had played back pushing this asshole into the sheets of his bed and kissing him until your mouth was sore, but you didn’t think you’d get this far. Sitting on his expensive armchair, surrounded by more red than you’d ever seen in your life. “So… Now what?” Sirius voiced out your thoughts minus the overwhelming red.

Contrary to the popular belief of the girls in your year, Sirius Black was the furthest thing from smooth you had ever experienced. He was messy, flirty of course, but overall incompetent and undeniably charming. He slowly moved his hand to yours before pulling away. “You want a drink” He blurted out, getting up quickly from the chair, his voice cracked mid sentence. “Of course.” You replied, following him to the bed where he pulled a 3 quarter fill bottle of fire whiskey from under it. He passed the bottle to you, watching your throat and hands intently as you unscrewed the bottle taking a sip. You passed to him and watched him chugged twice as much as you did, smiling goofily. “I better catch up” You laughed, moving closer to him, until your legs touched. You swear you could see him gulp comically as he pushed the bottle to you again. You decided to take a larger sip, groaning slightly at the burn that ran down your throat.

“So.” He spoke up after a little while of getting drunk together, moving to lay down the bed, staring at the small glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. “So?” You questioned him, laying down opposite him, your hands on your chest as you also fixed your vision on the stars. “We’re here.” He tried saying as nonchalantly as possible, sneaking his hand to his side and toward you. “Mhm. In your bedroom.” You added, making him pause his hand movement for a moment before hesitantly continuing. “Drinking.” He said. “Ha Yeah.” You moved your hand to meet in the middle, but as you hands met there was a knock at the door. You quickly managed to part far enough away that it would at least seem like he just invited a “friend” over. “What?!” He shouted, you both heard a reply back from a firm woman, Walburga. “Your father and I would actually like you at the dinner table for once, Sirius.” A shiver travelled up your spine as you heard her speak, you’d never actually heard her. It was as regal as you imagined. “No thanks.” He simply said, you heard a huff outside the door and footsteps down the stairs along with a string of insults followed them. “Unforgivable. Unacceptable. Completely inappropriate.” Sirius sighed and looked at you, his shoulders relaxed slightly. “She wouldn’t barge in. Doesn’t like all the red” He whispered to you, finally making the first move of straddling you. You gasped slightly, an unexpected move on his part.

He dipped down into a kiss, dragging your lips upwards into it as he pulled away, grinding his hips downwards. “You’re a cocky bastard” You moaned softly, sitting up so you could get an advance. You didn’t know how this night would go, but you both had a feeling about it. You put your hands on his back, pulling him towards you for another kiss, a deeper one. One that muffed a moan in your mouth as you bucked your hips upwards into his. “Y-You’re one to talk, love.” He stuttered out as you pushed him down into the bed, getting onto him now. You grinded slowly and hard, his hips stuttering upwards at yours for more friction, but you held him down keeping your excruciating pace as he helplessly moaned as quietly as he could. “We’ll see about that.” You smirked confidently as you kissed his neck, exploring up his jawline, sloppy open mouthed kisses placed on any open skin of his neck.

You helped him pull of shirt, knocking the now empty bottle of fire whiskey to the floor. You thanked Merlin for the rug under the bed. “You look beautiful, I just wanna kiss you everywhere.” You said, fulfilling your promise as you immediately latched onto him, leaving hickeys on his stomach, moving to his nipples. You took it in your mouth, sucking and flicking your tongue over the already swollen skin. Sirius put a hand over his own mouth, his free hand on the back of your neck, pulling at you as you sucked. He grinded on any surface he could find which was currently your thigh pressed against his boner. It was starting to get hot between you both. The grinding and the fire whiskey was making it sweaty. You stopped, Sirius helping you pull off your shirt between kissing.

You somehow managed to get your pants off in the process. You grinded your crutches together, heavy breathes between you as you leaned down to kiss him more deeply, biting his bottom lip and swallowing his pornographic moans. You were almost naked besides your underwear and all Sirius had left was his pants, but you both forgot it was an element as you continued to make out. You could hear from the desperate bucking of Sirius’s hips that he was getting closed. “You’re so beautiful, Sirius. So hot.” You said between kissing him, holding him close as he started to thrust against you harder. “Such a good slut.” He moaned a little to loudly, making you hush him with a hand on his mouth.

“Are you gonna cum, my love?” You whispered in his ear softly as he continued grinding your leg, he nodded. You removed the hand as he hugged you, shaking slightly as he reached the edge. You unbuttoned his jeans, slipped a hand past the waistband of his underwear, using the gather precum as a little bit of lube to jerk him off faster. His breath was shaky as he grinded against your palm, sweat running down his brow as you kissed his jaw more. “I-I’m gonna cum.” Sirius stuttered out, his thrusts becoming more frantic. “Cum for me, Pads.” You crashed your lips together as he whimpered into your mouth, spilling his load in his pants and partly on your hand. He let out a shaky breath as he rode his high, letting you rub the head of his dick. He whimpered, pulling away from the kiss to breath. “I love you” He said suddenly, his hand moving to the back of your neck to bring you in for a short peck. “I love you too, Pads.” You said in between kisses. “I wanna leave with you” He said more frantically, kissing along your face down to your jaw and then neck. “I’ll take you wherever you want to go, love.” You shakily breathed out as he gave you a hickey at the base of your neck. Kissing and sucking your soft spots. “Away from this place?” He asked, his breath tickling your neck as he stopped. “Far, far away.” You said, pulling away from, positioning yourself between his legs, your hands going to take off his pants.

You were about to take off Sirius’s pants, the cum stain on his pants starting to show. You heard a sniff and looked up at him. There were tears in his eyes. “Oh no. Did I do something? Are you okay?” You quickly moved to his face, holding it in your hands, wiping his tears. “N-No. I’m okay, I’m fine.” He sobbed, moving his hands onto you, as you searched into his eyes. You shushed him as stroked his face softly, moving both of you into the bed. He laid his head on your chest and cried. “You’re fine.” You whispered, stroking his hair softly. Your head was spinning now that you laid down, your vision blurred a little to the left. You imagined Sirius probably felt worse. “You’re okay” You shushed him, rocking slightly as you attempted to relax him. You can hear him hiccup as he continues to sniff. You continued to shush him and stroking his hair as he whispered the odd “It’s fine. I’m fine. We can carry on.” and you just comforted him. Letting him know it was fine to wait a while, you were both drunk and tired. You stayed awake as long as you or at least for as long as it took for the crying boy to fall asleep in your arms. You sleepily pulled the duvet over the both of you, holding him close to your chest as you too fell asleep.

You were woken up by a knock on the door, Sirius jolting up next to you in one motion looking mad with his insane case of bed head and still very shirtless from the night before. You on the other hand were stripped down to your briefs and now looking at the door like a deer in headlights. You almost forget you were in the Black’s residence. You heard a not very cheery and more depressing voice from the other side of the door. “Sirius. You and your “friend” need to be out before mum and dad wake up.” You heard, thank Merlin, Regulus outside the door. A relieved yet suspicious look on Sirius’s face taught you that this was not a regular occurrence. You took a look at the clock on the wall, 5am. You were lucky.

You scrambled out of bed, pulling your pants off the floor, almost tripping on the bottle of fire whiskey on the floor. You groaned thinking of the night before. Sirius didn’t decide to move yet, falling back on the bed with a groan and blush painted on his face. “What?” You asked, turning to him. He shook his head slightly, not wanting to answer you at this time of the morning. “If you don’t sneak me out of this hellhole, you’ll never hear the end of it.” He sighed, pulling the duvet off and lazily getting up, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. He scratched his stomach, picking up a shirt from the floor and over his head. You pointed at his pants making him blush and went to look around the laundry pile for a pair of pants, slipping off his stained pants for new ones.

“Do you have to go now?” He pouted, moving to you, tucking his head into your neck. “You know I don’t want to leave you, Pads.” You huffed, rubbing his back softly. “If you’re really so upset. You can join me for breakfast.” You added, pulling away from him to give him a kiss on the forehead. He groaned louder at the idea of leaving the house before the sun was even up. “Come on, (Y/N). If you love me, don’t leave me” He pouted as hard as he could. “And get murdered? No thanks.” You put your hands on his cheeks, squishing his face in your hands. You pulled away, grabbing a sock from the floor and the other floor sock from the armchair.

All dressed and ready, both of you sneak down the stairs, careful not to step on creaky floorboards. Sirius whispered “Kreacher.” A small pop and the grouchy house elf was in front of them, staring at your knees instead of your eyes. “What, Master Sirius?” He said rather loudly, rolling his eyes when you both shushed him. “My friend here needs one of my coats and maybe some breakfast to go.” He turned to you. “Would you like breakfast?” He asked you, you shook your head as politely as you could. “I’ll get some on the way home.” Sirius nodded and turned back to Kreacher. “No on the breakfast, but I will need a coat. Maybe one for me as well… and my slippers.” He said to the small house elf. Kreacher groaned, popping out and back in with Sirius’s usual leather jacket and a fancy looking coat. “That will be all.” Sirius ended, taking the leather jacket, putting it on and then helping you into the green-ish petticoat which was a bit big for you. You could imagine Sirius would drown in it.

“So you changed your mind?” You cocked an eyebrow at Sirius and he shrugged, opening the door for you. “Boyfriends first.” He bowed a little, making you giggle quietly. You had both successfully escaped the house and were going down the long street, you were kicking up little piles of gravel on the roads while Sirius whistled absentmindedly, staring at his feet as he walked. The cool air felt like it was strangling you as you walked.

You didn’t want to mention last night, but you feel like you had to. “You know it’s okay if you don’t want to yet.” You said quietly as you moved closer to him, holding his hand. “I know.” He said blankly, giving your hand a squeeze. “Okay.” You said softly back, pulling him closer, his face now inches away from yours. He blushed looking away. “What if someone sees?” He said shyly, his voice dying in his throat as you brushed your lips against his. “Then they’ll have to tear me off you.” You said, crashing your lips together, holding the back of his neck perfectly in your free hand. You still kept your hands together, pulling it up to your heart, holding it close. You broke the kiss, peppering his face with a few more kisses before pulling him behind you, leaving him a blushing mess. “Come on, sleepy head. ‘m hungry.” You groaned grumpily with the biggest smile on your face as he trailed behind you.

Summary: just some domestic stuff ‘cause washing your lover’s hair is the intimate thing you can do with your fingers.

Pairing: Sirius Black x Male Reader 

Key: (Y/N)- your name 

Word Count: 812

A/N: Sorry I’ve been gone for a month, I’ve been struggling with mento illnesses. I’m most likely going to purge my entire inbox because it’s really stressful haha…

His hands were intertwined with yours, his fingers running circles around your knuckles as the light of the new day streamed through the windows. You watched his chest rise and fall peacefully for once. You moved your hand sleepily to his chest, feeling the pulse underneath. His breath hitched as you did, but quickly calmed. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes and kissing your forehead softly.

“(Y/N).” He spoke softly, finishing your name with a kiss to your knuckles.

“Sirius.” You replied, humming with your eyes closed concentrating on his soft lips on your hands, the warmth travelling your entire body as he practically praised your existence.

“I…” He trailed off a little looking away from you as he tried to push out his thoughts.

“You?” You looked at him through your eyelashes, your eyebrow raised in question.

“I love you.” His eyes holding a sparkle of fondness only you got to see. He looked like he couldn’t stop smiling even if he tried, looked rather goofy on his sharp face.

You smiled widely, stretching your neck up to look at him, he was blushing slightly as he continued to fidget with your fingers, his eyes darting away from yours. You took your hand away from him, placing it on the side of his face and pulling him close. Your lips teased his, as you stopped a mere inch away. You smiled to yourself again as Sirius bridged the gap. His arm sandwiched underneath you as a pillar as you bent over him to deepen the kiss.

“We have to get up” You stretched across him, falling onto him with a small thump. He sighed and wrapped his arms around you, squeezing around you.

“What if we didn’t?” He said in between kisses across your shoulder and neck, making you shiver. You shook your head and pushed yourself up against him. He wrapped the duvet around him, only his face visible in his duvet burrito. You kissed his nose and he smiled warmly.

You yawned and stretched your limbs upwards, feeling the tension and relaxation of the action.

“Sexy.” He commented and you took a pillow to throw at him. He laughed his hands up in defence as you huffed. You took your shirt from the floor slipping it on as your feet found their way into slippers as you made your way to the bathroom you could hear him slipping his way out of bed, following you.

The water hit your sleep ridden muscles making you sigh as you heard the curtain open next to you.

“Mind if I join?” He asked, stepping into the shower regardless. You nodded and both of you did your shower routines, slipping past each other in sync to use the shower head.

“Hair?” You said, he nodded and lowered his head slightly. You grabbed the shampoo and slowly scrubbed the wash into his locks, letting him slip past so you could wash it out with the slowly cooling water. He sighed in content as your fingers deepened the massaging. He really was a dog sometimes, which became apparent as you mindlessly scratched the back of his ears with the shampoo making him sigh and lean into it.

“Feels nice?” You asked, scratching at his scalp to work it in.

“Beyond.” He nodded, lowering his head a little more so you could access the back.

“Rinse.” He hummed and let his head fall back as the shampoo washed out and down his body, he couldn’t help, but sigh again. You pulled his head in and kissed his forehead softly.

“Turn around for the conditioner” You said, moving back a little so he could turn around, resting his hands against the shower wall. You laughed a little to yourself.

“What?” He asked “oblivious” to him sticking out his ass for you to admire. You laid a hand on the small of his back feeling him lean into the feeling.

“Oh nothing.” You smiled, reaching for the conditions and repeating the previous steps.

You hugged him from the back, kissing his neck softly. “Breakfast?”

“Some eggs would be nice, maybe some toast.” He hummed softly, turning the shower off and grabbing your hands to hold and kiss.

“Sounds good, come on.” You moved away, grabbing his hand as you got out. He followed, grabbing you both towels. You sat back on the bed, goosebumps travelling across your body as the cold air settled on you. Sirius immediately attacked your head with a towel, softly scruffing it around to dry your hair. Standing up a little dizzy, you did the same.

You dressed in some lazy day clothing and went down to the kitchen to wait for Sirius to get ready.

“How about those eggs, huh?” He said as he entered, going for the stove with a pan that you weren’t sure he came in with.

Summary: drabble about Sirius’s death :) , (Y/N) reacts etc.

Pairing: Sirius Black x Male Reader

Key: (Y/N)- your name

Warning: sirius’s death, angst, survivor’s guilt, a lot of sobbing (i am venting)

Word Count: 536

He dropped to his knees looking down. A black abyss felt like it would tear him apart, limb from limb. The kind of heart wrenching sob that started in one person’s throat and lodged itself into another. His throat stung and flexed as he tried to get the words out, but nothing came out. Remus was pulling Harry back as best he could, (Y/N) couldn’t stop. It just came out now, horrible sobs that mixed with Harry’s screams.

He put his head in his hands, gripping at his own hair with a frantic inhuman sound coming from his throat. There was nothing he wished more than to switch places as he watched Harry scream. It should’ve been him, he repeated in his head over and over again. No one dared to comfort him, most too busy trying to calm Harry down.

“It’s broken.” He repeated over and over again as Remus tried to drag him out of there, but he wouldn’t budge, only looking up and down from his hands to the veil.

“We have to go.” He sighed, trying to comfort him the best he could given his own heartbreak.

“I won’t leave him there! He’s not gone! H-He can’t be. Please, Remus. Save him. Please.” He begged, his hands gripped onto Remus’s pants desperately, tears had stopped flowing almost 20 minutes ago now he just dry sobbed and heaved.

“I can’t.” He whispered softly, grabbing the back of (Y/N) head with his hand as he sobbed further into his pants.

“Y-You have to. Please.” It broke Remus’s heart, seeing his friend like this. With Harry gone and him and (Y/N) being the only people left in the death trap, he too fell to his knees with him.

“I couldn’t even if I-I wanted to.” He said shakily as he hugged (Y/N), keeping him from shaking harder in his grasp. He wanted to cry too… He’d lost his best friend.

“We c-can’t even have a proper funeral, Moony.” He shouted into the fabric of Remus’s jacket, gripping on Remus like he was the last thing keeping him together and in this moment… he was.!

“We just got him back.” Remus sniffed a little, hugging (Y/N) tighter. They were all that was left.

“Please make the hurting stop, Remus. Please.” He begged more, Remus’s figure started shaking a bit. A few sniffs escaping his careful facade.

“I don’t know how.” He choked out honestly, trying to muffle his cries into (Y/N)‘s coats.

“Neither do I.” (Y/N) stuffed his face into Remus’s jacket again, shielding himself from the hurt it brought him to look up. Just for a moment.

“Then I guess we’re in the same boat” Remus chuckled sadly, a real joke of the world, he thought. A cruel, stupid, reckless joke.

“Seems like it.” He held onto Remus, his feelings going numb as he looked at the veil in front of him. Of all the rooms they could’ve been in, it had to be this one.

“He’s really gone.” He spoke up again, sighing shakily as he felt Remus rubbing his back in circles. It made him feel calm for a moment, but moments never last anyway.