#incorrect ssbu quotes
Chrom, washing his hands next to M! Robin:
Chrom, cupping his hands:
Chrom, as water is overflowing in his hands: Hey, this water is getting out of hand.
Robin: And that’s basically how we became friends.
King Dedede: You just need to go to your happy place.
King K. Rool: What’s that? Sounds stupid.
King Dedede: Well, everyone’s happy place is different.
King Dedede: For me, I just imagine I’m just slurping the World’s Longest Piece of Linguine.
King Dedede: It just keeps going, and every twenty feet of noodle, there’s a sauce change!
Shulk:You’re always mean when you wake up.
Cloud: That’s not true. You just suck at waking me up.
Shulk: I always wake you up gently, don’t I?
Cloud: Oh, yeah! Totally! Thanks for throwing me off the bed!
Simon: I’m into dark humor.
Pit, turning off the lights: Wanna hear a joke?
Marth: Ike and I are no longer friends.
Ike: Marth, that is the worst way to announce we’re dating.
Samus, most likely drunk after hanging out with Snake and Bayo: So if the bigger the car the smaller the dick, and the bigger the shoe the bigger the dick, then CLOWNS-
Mario, 100% concerned: I’m gonna have to stop you there.
Joker: I’ve connected the dots.
Little Mac: You didn’t connect shit.
Joker: I’ve connected them.
Sonic: What do you call 2000 mockingbirds?
Sonic: 2kilomockingbirds. :)
Falco:No.
Sonic:Yes.
Link: I was cooking with Cloud and I tell him, “You have to put the stove on low heat first.”
Link: He goes, “But heat is heat.”
Link, shrugging: Heat IS heat… So I didn’t have anything to say.
Banjo: Well, I guess it’s time to go battle!
Master Hand:STOP.
Banjo: what? But I have an invitation.
Master Hand: You must wait.
Banjo: Oh, I see! I can hold off for a few minutes!
Master Hand: Actually, until fall.
Banjo: But there’s only one other person in line.
Master Hand, charging finger blast: WAIT YOUR TURN.
Banjo:O-okay…
Daisy:WAIT.
Daisy: Before Pride Month ends, does anyone wanna admit they got a crush on me?
Banjo: Just found out about transphobia!
Kazooie, popping over Banjo’s shoulder and throwing a bunch of water at nothing: STOP IT!
Little Mac: So I regret something I did today.
Little Mac: I gave my friend a boombox and he hasn’t stopped playing really bad music since.
Joker, walking in with a boombox:
Little Mac: Joker, what are you doing?
Joker:
Joker: *starts playing Caramelldensen and starts dancing*
BOTW Link at the beginning of Smash, happy and excited to meet all these amazingly iconic characters, and remembering well that TP Link told him to be kind, courteous, and not too weird: Hummus. Thoughts?
Samus: You either buckle up and do your work or you’ll end up at McDonald’s.
Ness: We’re going to McDonald’s if I don’t do my work?
Samus:No-
Lucina: How you holdin’ up, Marth?
Marth: I have this headache that comes and goes.
Eight and Roy: *walk in, arguing if it’s sanitary to adopt a rat from the streets or not*
Marth: Ugh, there it is again.
Zelda, pointing at Little Mac and Joker: My last two braincells.
BOTW Link: Haha…. what if…… we killed Rathalos together….. in the World of Light?……… Haha,,, I’m joking……Unless?..
BOTW Zelda, visiting: Link, what are they feeding you?
Sans, walking by:Hey.
Samus, very tired:Hey.
Samus:
Samus:
Samus, turning around:Wait.
*Some of the fighters figuring out social media*
Ken: I’m addicted to working out.
Link: I’m addicted to food.
Captain Falcon: I’m addicted to my own face.
Cloud: I have food poisoning.
Zelda: Here are two pictures - one is your room, the other one is a garbage dump in the Philippines. Can you tell which is which?
Little Mac: …That one’s the garbage dump?
Zelda: THEY’RE BOTH FROM YOUR ROOM!
Dark Pit: You changed into your formal wear when you thought you would be locked in your room all night?
Joker: It helps me relax!
Dark Pit: Suit yourself.
Pit: He just did.
Shulk, on a date: Babe… When I’m with you… Shrimp heaven really IS now…
Roy, a bartender who has seen Shulk use this line at least 10 times now: Shulk, you can’t keep doing this.
Dark Pit: What are snails even trying to do?
Pit, close to sobbing: Their best.
