do you ever sabotage your own free time? like wtf is that about? i want to play this game or read or do something specific but instead i will just stare out the window or scroll mindlessly???
WandaVision: Wanda’s kids are imaginary because Vision is dead and also you can’t get pregnant from having sex with a robot
Multiverse of Madness: Wanda’s kids are real in literally every other universe even though Vision is nowhere to be seen and you still can’t get pregnant by having sex with a ROBOT
There’s this big influenza epidemic this year. This has been the worst flu season in like 8 years I believe and the ER rooms have been flooded with patients.
But I don’t have the flu.
I have acid reflux and if you’re not familiar, its when your belly gets bloated, you hiccup nonstop and other symptoms like chest pain and what not. How it comes about, there are a variety of reasons as to why mostly with if you eat too much greasy food, eaten something different from your normal diet, etc. Its been a week I’ve had it and the hiccups and bloating have gone down immensely but that chest pain is still there and very uncomfortable. People keep telling me to go to the hospital but I hate going for:
Unhelpful
Long wait
Expensive
And that’s exactly what I got from it. I waited 4 hours to receive only a max of 10 minutes of actual face to face interaction with a doctor, a trash doctor, a higher dosage of the medicine I am currently taking, and a $100 copay bill.
I could’ve stayed home and suffered for all of this
pls… i beg of you… reblog creations… or else there won’t be any more creations
it makes me so sad to see so many creators talking in the tags about how they’re not creating as much because less and less people are interacting. this is proof that interaction is vital.this is proof that a lack of interaction leads to discouraged creators and leads to less creations. liking—and only liking—does not encourage creators.
and that’s because (1) the purpose of this website is to share things that bring us joy and (2) likes don’t share things or ensure something is seen by more people, not like they do on other sites. so, when so many people decide to only like a post and not share it (i.e. not reblog it), that tells the creator that those people didn’t think their hard work was worth sharing with others. that’s discouraging.
and the creator isn’t the only one that gets something out of that. you get something, too. you get the joy of sharing something you like; that’s a meaningful experience for both you and for the creator. and that experience—that interaction—encourages the creator to create more, and so there’s more joy to be had for both you and the creator.
long story short, interaction (i.e., reblogging, which is interaction in its simplest form on this site) brings joy. it’s literally all about the joy, people. the joy in discovering and sharing and appreciating and marveling at creations. so please reblog—for everyone’s sake, including your own.
Sorry for not responding much and not being here often. It’s all because getting off antidepressants is kicking my ass big time. I’ll be back on track soon I promise
it took till i was older to really realize the gravity of why (even though i knew it was wrong) but uh dont make fun of peoples teeth. ever. if theyre crooked, if theyre missing, yellowed etc. dental care is becoming more and more inaccessible to anyone below the upper middle class in the US. when people are under intense stress, depressed or dealing with a physical disability, dental hygeine is easy to drop and difficult to maintain. if someone only has 600 dollars available for healthcare, i cannot name many that would treat their teeth before their body.
insults of someones body or appearance have never been in my taste, but the older ive got the more ive realized how short sighted and cruel it is to make light of the entire weight of someones life shown in their face. without even considering why it might be like that in the first place.
I’m quite bored with Tumblr and my life at the moment so sorry if I’m not being interesting or doing anything other than my selfie a day thing. I have 2 exams this week and as always an absurd amount of homework. Maybe I’ll post some of my numerous story plots here. Or some of my tri-weekly physics doodles.
Today I felt sadness again. I know what you might be thinking : “but you’re depressed! You have a blog about depression. Sadness isn’t new for you”. Well, it is. Sadness is not something I experiment a lot, in my everyday life.
It’s been a long time since I felt sad, and I mean sad in the literal way. It wasn’t like the usual stuff. It didn’t feel like my depression. It didn’t feel like when I’m having my crisis. I didn’t feel like me being depressed.
It felt totally different.
You see, my depression is very violent. When it happens, when it suddenly hits me, it hurts so much that I can’t even breathe anymore. I feel anxious, panicked, broken, hurt. But not sad. Not usually. Mostly, I panic, I cry, I scream, I hit my walls, I break stuff, I run if I can… And then, when the crisis is over, I feel this horrible feeling of loneliness, hopelessness, and emptiness growing inside of me, eating me up, stopping me from doing anything.
But I don’t feel sad.My depression is more about PAIN. But not necessarily sadness. And I haven’t feel sad for a really long time… To be completely honest with you guys, I almost forgot how it felt. When it happened to me today, I was confused and kinda lost for a while. I was like “what is this feeling? This is not how it usually feels like.”
I understood, later, it was just basic sadness.
Why I was feeling sad today is not important or relevant. The reason doesn’t matter. My point is :sadness is really hard to feel too; and it has nothing to do with depression. I knew that already but today I’ve lived it.
I almost forgot about it but sadness is really difficult to handle too. We often forget what it’s like to feel sad. Just sad, not depressed. Sadness is this feeling you have in your guts that makes you believe you will never be happy again. Like,it takes all your joy away and leaves you just like that. It feels like you will never be able to smile or laugh again. It’s really weird, cause you don’t really want to cry or anything. It’s like you’re shut down. You don’t want to do anything but listen to sad songs and think about whatever it is that makes you sad. It’s like a whole new state you’re into.
Sadness is pretty damaging too. To me, depression is worse, of course. But when you haven’t felt sad for a very long time and it hits you again, it’s really hard. You’re like “oh yeah, I remember it now, it sucks too!”
Anyway, what I learnt from this experience is that : once again, sadness and depression are not the same thing. You can feel sad, it doesn’t mean you’re depressed. And depression doesn’t always come with sadness.
When you’re so overstimulated you just want a quesadilla for the low spoon cost only to find out the rush grabbed bag of tortillas are NOT gluten free. EVEN THOUGH IT WAS IN THE GLUTEN FREE SECTION!!!
