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celestialselfdiscovery:

I feel loved

I’m happy

I feel appreciated

I’m respected

I love expressing myself

I’m celebrated

I have the most clarity

I’m healthy

I have the most fun day everyday

Good words to say to yourself every day!

In this video, I guide you through some affirmations that will help you attract your soulmate/specific person.

It is my personal belief that using a set of affirmations for at least 15 days helps integrate them into your subconscious mind.

Once the subconscious mind believes in something, typically our outward actions and world change around us - which is why I recommend that you listen to these affirmations every day for 15 days, this gives you enough time for them to become a part of your subconscious mind.

My tips for making this meditation even more powerful:

1. Place both hands on your chest above your heart

2. Say the affirmations out loud

3. Make sure you get your emotions involved I hope these affirmations help you attract the love you truly deserve :) #affirmations#meditation#love

Seven ways you can #attract a specific person like an ex using the law of attraction. so there is someone in your life or someone who isn’t in your life that you are desperately trying to attract this could be an ex, it could be someone that you really admire or just the ideal soulmate or twin flame of your dreams

The first way to attract a specific person is something that I’ve personally used in my life, and it’s actually the way that I attracted my fiancée. Write a pros and cons list. In the pros write down everything you want in this person, or if this is an ex write down everything good you now want to see in this person and all the things you want to happen with this person. In the cons list write down everything you don’t want in this person, and again, if this is an ex write down all the things you no longer want to have happen in that #relationship. Soon you will find that everything you have written down you will begin to see, because what we focus on we attract!

The second thing that you need to do to attract a specific person is you need to become really aware that we attract who we are. So if you write everything in your pros list about the kind of person that you want to attract, so perhaps you want to attract someone that is really friendly, is a great communicator, perhaps someone who has good relationships with their family, someone who is kind-hearted, who is nice - we attract what we are! So if you find that there are some things that you’ve written down about the person that you want to attract and you are so contradictive to that, so perhaps you want someone that’s fit and healthy but you just sit down you watch TV all day and eat pizza. You need to be what you want to attract - so become more like the person that you want to attract! If you want to attract someone that’s lovely and kind - be lovely and kind to people! If you want to attract someone who is fit and healthy start becoming fit and healthy!

The third thing that you need to do to attract a specific person is you want to become very good at #visualizing. So you may want to just spend five minutes a day visualizing your partner or the person that you want to attract. So if this is someone you know. like an ex. then all you have to do is just think of your ex, and think of all the emotions you have with that ex, perhaps you want to feel gratitude, being grateful - the universe loves gratitude! So if you’re really grateful for your ex, and the #manifestation as appearing in your life, it will happen much quicker.

The fourth way to attract a specific person is you might want to come up with an #affirmation, or an #incantation, to really help you get the feeling of attracting that person. So it could be something like “I am so happy and grateful that this person is coming into my life” and you just keep on repeating and repeating it. You also want to make sure that you have the feelings of feeling good, feeling alive, feeling #grateful while you are doing this. Perhaps you want to do it while you’re exercising, because again like I said about visualizing, sometimes it’s really good to be actually moving our body, to be standing in a resourceful state to be able to make those affirmations even more powerful.

The fifth way to attract a specific person is you want to become the best version of yourself. In the process of becoming the best version of yourself and you’re growing, and you have more #ambition, #growing your personal development, you’re growing that business, you’re growing your income, you’re doing whatever it is that you consider being personal #growth. By becoming the best version of yourself, doing those daily practices, so like exercising daily #meditating daily, being kind and considerate to other people, by doing these things we are attracting new people into our lives new experiences new circumstances, so we can find the person that we are truly meant to be with.

The sixth way to attract a specific person is when you go to bed at night only think about things you want to #manifest. I used to be thinking of all the things going wrong in my life before I went to bed, I used to have feelings of worry and the things that weren’t currently working. Try not to think of these things before bed, only think about the things you want and by doing so you will attract better things into your life, including the person you are trying to manifest.

The seventh, and the last way, to attract a specific person is to let go of the outcome. Now, I feel like is the most problematic thing that people find when it comes to the law of attraction, and manifesting, and the reason why this is because it seems contradictory. We get what we focus on we get, but we need to let go of the outcome!… Visit: www.christineloveridge.com

The Law of Attraction

The Law of Attraction


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The Law of Attraction

The Law of Attraction


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The Law of Attraction

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Almost everyone has heard of tarot cards! But if you’ve never had a reading then you might know very little about how tarot really works. Perhaps you are even a little nervous about tarot cards because they’re an unknown. Similarly, you might be wary about the possibility the reading could tell you something significant about your future. As it turns out, many people gain huge benefits from a tarot reading. In this way, it’s well worth developing a deeper understanding of how this ancient, mystic practice can help you improve your life.

This guide will explain the nature and details of tarot readings. For example, we’ll explore why (and when) you might want a reading. Plus, discover what you can expect to learn from tarot. In addition, we’ll look at how the process works, and consider some of the meanings of relevant cards and spreads. Throughout, we’ll also consider how online tarot readings work, and why they might be right for you.

What Are Tarot Cards?

Tarot cards come in decks of 75. Every card carries not only a different image but also a range of different symbolic meanings.

In the simplest terms, there are 22 Major Arcana cards. These indicate information about our overall journey and purpose.

Comparatively, there are 56 Minor Arcana cards that symbolize the smaller, more transient parts of our lives. You can then break the 56 Minor Arcana cards into a group of 16. These show 16 psychological traits that we might embody during any period of our lives.

People use tarot cards for an incredibly wide variety of purposes. For example, you might ask for a reading that helps you make a decision, form a plan, learn about your deeper feelings, or figure out how to move past a place in which you currently feel stuck. A reading invariably prompts self-reflection and growth, facilitating new, more creative thinking about existing problems.

The History Of Tarot Cards

Tarot cards first emerged sometime around 1440, largely in Northern Italy. Although tarot card decks can look markedly different from one another, all of the imagery derives from common sources. The very first tarot cards were based on symbols derived from a wide range of myths, writings, and plays in the medieval period. At this time, tarot cards were also used for games such as trinofi and tarock.

Decks that were created in the 19th century onwards also include imagery from astrology and Kabbalah. In contemporary tarot practice, it can be hard to connect some of the card images with these original decks. However, there is always some symbolic link. Expert tarot card readers experiment with a range of decks. Eventually, they typically find one that best connects with their interpretive inclinations. Then, at the point of doing a reading, the tarot card reader is better able to use their intuitive understanding to make contextual sense of the deck.

How Do Tarot Cards Work?

If you’re new to tarot, you’re likely very curious about how these cards are supposed to work.

For example, if you book a free reading, are you going to get free tarot predictions?

Will you find out something frightening, like information about the end of your life or an indication of impending doom of some sort?

Unfortunately, these types of questions reflect a widespread, mistaken assumption that the cards are imbued with a kind of psychic power. Others may believe that tarot will offer concrete facts about the future. This is one of the reasons why the cards often intimidate many people. We may be scared to engage with what these cards could reveal. Consequently, this means that we miss out on a potent source of insight and inspiration.

In truth, while there is an undeniably mystic element to the tarot process, it isn’t really designed to predict the future. Rather, a tarot reading helps you to tap into your deepest intuitions, changing your perspective and generating valuable knowledge about how you can approach manifesting your dream life.

Each tarot card carries sophisticated, nuanced imagery that makes a direct link to your subconscious. This taps into your most profound desires and bypasses the restrictive, more logical part of your brain.

In doing so, the cards can help you understand yourself and your life in entirely new ways. This process can often kickstart a positive process of transformation. If you’re using the Law of Attraction to manifest goals, the very act of having a tarot card reading can create a clearer, more vivid visualization of what you want to achieve.

What Can You Learn From Tarot Readings?

In principle, you can use the tarot cards to learn about absolutely anything in your life, whether it concerns your history, your present, or your future. However, if you’re thinking about having your first reading, you might feel like you’d benefit from some inspiration on the types of issues that are commonly brought to a tarot card expert.

Common examples include the following:

  • Romantic relationships: You might want help figuring out the type of partner that would suit you, wonder about how to move on from a difficult breakup, or ask for assistance in choosing between two potential partners.
  • Careers: You might be asking yourself if you should leave your job and pursue a new career. Or, perhaps, you’re curious about the prospects for starting your own business in the near future.
  • Family dynamics: You might be debating whether to have children (or have additional children). Or you might be trying to navigate through a tricky family dispute, or just want to get a clearer perspective on the complex relationships in your family tree.
  • Personal development: You might want to cultivate a particular trait, such as self-confidence. Similarly, perhaps you wish to figure out your core values. Or, you want to explore the ways in which an issue from your past might be holding you back in the present.
  • Abundance: You might be weighing a wide range of factors in order to figure out how to best attract more wealth into your life. Alternatively, you may be trying to understand why this has typically been difficult for you in the past.

Tarot Card Meanings

Each aspect of the tarot card deck is linked to different elements, symbols, aspects of life and negative possibilities. However, Tarot card meaning can vary enormously between readings, given the position of the cards, the other cards that are placed nearby, and the intentions of the person asking for a reading (as well as the interpretative leanings of the reader).

Sometimes, they function as a kind of “yes or no oracle”, giving you the answer to simple questions. For example, they may answer a tricky decision you have to make. At other times, the cards may tell you a complex story that provides an overview of your past, present, and future, thereby facilitating self-knowledge. This is one of the reasons why people often develop a habit of having regular readings, even when they have no massive issues in their life.

So, while a tarot card meanings list can certainly provide you with a general sense of the role each card may play, it can’t realistically account for the many different ways in which context will subtly impact on meaning. Let’s take a closer look at each category of cards. There are unifying features that connect each distinct aspect of the deck. You should also be encouraged to familiarize yourself with the general meanings. Consequently, this can help you get more out of your tarot card readings.

The Major Arcana

Also known as the trump cards, the major arcana cards all depict clearly defined archetypes. They work through a linear narrative from The Fool (at number 0) to The World (at number 22).

These cards are core to tarot readings. They track the typical spiritual journey that humans take from the point of ignorance to eventual enlightenment. Each major arcana card carries an important lesson and connects the reader with a particular stage of a person’s self-development.

Interestingly, some tarot card experts will occasionally conduct readings exclusively using cards from the major arcana; this should give you an indication of their richness and power.

Major Arcana Cards

  1. The Fool
  2. The Magician
  3. The High Priestess
  4. The Empress
  5. The Emperor
  6. The Hierophant
  7. The Lovers
  8. The Chariot
  9. Strength
  10. The Hermit
  11. Wheel of Fortune
  12. Justice
  13. The Hanged Man
  14. Death
  15. Temperance
  16. The Devil
  17. The Tower
  18. The Star
  19. The Moon
  20. The Sun
  21. Judgment
  22. The World

 

Suit Of Wands

The 14 cards in the suit of wands are traditionally linked to the element of fire. As such, all of these cards have some connection to your passions, your potential, your strength and the things that inspire you in life.

In some readings, these cards also relate to your fundamental, primal energy. A suit of wands card can suggest a creation of any kind.

You may also often see the suit of wands cards in readings that relate to making concrete plans or taking action after a period of reflection. Where they play a more negative role, they can be read as suggesting impetuousness or directionless.

Suit Of Wands Cards

  • Ace Of Wands
  • Two Of Wands
  • Three Of Wands
  • Four Of Wands
  • Five Of Wands
  • Six Of Wands
  • Seven Of Wands
  • Eight Of Wands
  • Nine Of Wands
  • Ten Of Wands
  • Page Of Wands
  • Knight Of Wands
  • Queen Of Wands
  • King Of Wands

 

Suit Of Cups

The 14 cards in the suit of cups are all related to the sphere of emotions, as well as to the unconscious mind and gut feeling. As such, they often appear in useful positions when a relationship issue (either platonic or romantic) is the focus.

They can also tell you a lot about your inner life and the role it is playing in restricting or facilitating the development. The suit of cups cards has a connection to the element of water. They can sometimes indicate something important about a problematic disconnect between the person’s inner life and their outer actions.

Suit Of Cups Cards

  • Ace Of Cups
  • Two Of Cups
  • Three Of Cups
  • Four Of Cups
  • Five Of Cups
  • Six Of Cups
  • Seven Of Cups
  • Eight Of Cups
  • Nine Of Cups
  • Ten Of Cups
  • Page Of Cups
  • Knight Of Cups
  • Queen Of Cups
  • King Of Cups

 

Suit Of Swords

Also containing 14 cards, the suit of swords is linked to the element of air.

While all of the cards carry a distinct meaning, they tend to relate to themes around truth, goals, communication, reason, and intelligence. Consequently, it’s unsurprising to see sword cards appear in spreads that relate to a question on how to make tricky decisions, how to balance different competing interests or whether to go with your heart or head.

When they appear to indicate something negative, cards from the suit of swords often tell you that you need to exercise more empathy and understanding in your treatment of others.

Suit Of Swords Cards

  • Ace Of Swords
  • Two Of Swords
  • Three Of Swords
  • Four Of Swords
  • Five Of Swords
  • Six Of Swords
  • Seven Of Swords
  • Eight Of Swords
  • Nine Of Swords
  • Ten Of Swords
  • Page Of Swords
  • Knight Of Swords
  • Queen Of Swords
  • King Of Swords

 

Suit Of Pentacles

Finally, the suit of Pentacles (or coins) includes 14 cards that bear a connection to the earth element. They relate to material pursuits in our lives, and to our worldly concerns in general.

Understandably, they often link to matters about financial abundance (or the lack thereof), but their symbolism can also be much broader, including themes around stability, health, and personal security.

When they appear in a reading, they typically tell you something about your long-term goals or investments, either at work or at home. In the negative, they can relate to jealousy or to an uncontrolled ambition that is leading you to live an unbalanced life.

Suit Of Coins/Pentacles Cards

  • Ace Of Pentacles
  • Two Of Pentacles
  • Three Of Pentacles
  • Four Of Pentacles
  • Five Of Pentacles
  • Six Of Pentacles
  • Seven Of Pentacles
  • Eight Of Pentacles
  • Nine Of Pentacles
  • Ten Of Pentacles
  • Page Of Pentacles
  • Knight Of Pentacles
  • Queen Of Pentacles
  • King Of Pentacles

Getting A Free Tarot Reading At Trusted Tarot

While you might not previously have considered the possibility of having your tarot reading done online, this can be just as useful as having a reading in person (as well as more convenient). And, as a bonus, it’s possible to get an online reading for free. While you might initially worry that a free tarot reading could be less informative or in-depth than a paid reading, rest assured that this is not the case.

Trusted Tarot has received more than 50,000 five star reviews for their free tarot card reading service, and have deservedly become one of the world’s leading Tarot resources. If you’re looking for a reading you can trust, you can feel secure in the idea that Trusted Tarot will deliver results. For example, say you want a free love tarot reading that helps you find your way towards the right partner. Free love tarot reading spreads can be given with a minimal amount of information from you and will be speedily delivered. With an intuitive, easily navigable website and no assumptions of prior knowledge about tarot spreads, Trusted Tarot is as useful to the beginner as it is to an experienced tarot customer.

Learn More About Trusted Tarot

Tarot cards reading is an art. It’s natural that you want to ensure that you’re working with an expert who sees you as a real person and not merely a faceless entity on the internet. All of the Trusted Tarot tarot card readers are experienced, thoughtful practitioners who want to help you get the most out of their service. I’ve found they can be relied on to fully concentrate on the target question when they provide a reading. In addition, if you’re curious about other processes that can help you make decisions and manifest your dreams, Trusted Tarot also provide information on horoscopes, biorhythms, and runes.

How The Online Tarot Card Reading Works

In many ways, an online tarot reading works in the same way as the one you would receive in person. You need to provide vital information about yourself so that the reading will be accurate.

OnTrusted Tarot, you’ll be asked to share your name, your date of birth and your star sign. This all allows the reader to see your astrological chart. In turn, they should get a sense of the kind of basic traits you might have, as well as the types of challenges you might meet.

Next, you get to choose ten cards (just as you would if the deck was in front of you). Then you provide your email address so that you can receive the report on your free tarot reading. These reports are highly detailed, helping you get the most out of the reading.

The reading is not randomly generated, as it might be on other sites. Rather, your assigned reader shuffles a deck of tarot cards each day. They then upload the information about their order to the site. This process ensures that your reading actually reflects the order of a real, physical deck of cards. The deck is derived from an original deck of Tarot cards from the early 1900s.

Choosing a Good Question

In order to get the most out of your tarot reading, it’s vital that you spend some time clarifying the question you want to ask or the issue you want to explore. While the above gave you an indication of the types of topics that most people focus on when they ask for a tarot reading, it’s well worth learning how to distill those topics down to something that works well with a tarot spread.

Here are some of the best tips for tarot readings:

  • Choose something about which you don’t already have the answer. You won’t be guided by the reading if you come into it with a prior decision in mind. For example, if you’re wondering about family relationships, ask “How can I improve my relationship with my brother?” rather than “How can I get out of having to have dinner with my brother?”
  • Add detail, but not to an excessive amount. Try to find a broad way to look at a specific problem, in other words. To use another example, choose the question “How can I find a career that balances all my values?” rather than listing all of those values and interests, as that’s too much detail.
  • Try to focus on yourself, not on someone else… even if you think that this other person might be primarily responsible for the challenges you’re currently facing. So, if there’s a conflict with your spouse, for example, ask what role you play in the conflict rather than asking why your partner doesn’t listen.
  • Adopt an attitude of neutrality and openness to the outcome of the reading. This is an extension of the above advice to choose an issue about which you don’t have a pre-conceived notion. It’s simply not useful to ask for a reading only to confirm your preexisting beliefs or desires.

Your Tarot Reading Explained

So, how does your reading work, and how can you best interpret the information? As you choose cards, the image associated with each one will be revealed, and in the reading report, they will appear in the appropriate position to help you understand how they relate to your current issues and goals in life. The meaning of every card will be explained, along with an indication of how it may connect to your past, present and future.

Every reading is distinct, tailored to the individual, and there are so many factors in play that it would be almost impossible to receive the same reading as anyone else.

If you feel ready for your own, personal tarot reading, click here now.

One of the reasons why these tarot card reports are so insightful is that each report lists a range of key interpretations associated with each card. Plus, that meaning is uniquely influenced by where the card sits in the order of cards you chose.

You can also see a close-up image of the card, allowing you to tap into your own interpretations of its meaning. Often, people find that the pictures evoke unexpected feelings and thoughts. This subconscious response adds an extra layer of significance and usefulness to the reading.

Tarot Summary

In sum, tarot cards are often viewed as mysterious or foreboding in nature. However, the reality is that they are a powerful, useful tool that just about anyone can benefit from using. Rather than predicting the future, they help you use your gut instincts, intuitions, and innate creativity. In turn, this helps you to learn more about your current situation. This can be especially helpful when you need to make a hard choice about the direction you need to choose.

Whether you’re worried about your career, trying to choose the right partner, starting a new business or coping with a loss, the cards can offer the clarity you need.

While you may not have considered getting an online tarot reading in the past, you’ll now have a better understanding of why this is a fantastic, straightforward option that provides the same accuracy that you can expect from a face-to-face reading.

AtTrusted Tarot, you can get a comprehensive, free online tarot reading from a highly trusted and world-renowned source that is conveniently available whenever you need it. Many people find themselves coming back for regular readings as their life circumstances and desires change; each reading can offer fresh guidance about new events and challenges you might face.

Start Your Free Tarot Reading! Click Here Now…

The post Tarot Reading: What Are Tarot Cards? (+ Get A FREE Tarot Reading) appeared first on The Law Of Attraction.



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According to conventional wisdom, opposites attract! This means we’re drawn to those who are dramatically different from ourselves. You may well have noticed this pattern in your own relationships, observed it in the partner choices made by your friends, or even felt it in your platonic relationships. Sometimes, there’s an intense type of chemistry between people who seem superficially incompatible. And while there are benefits to being with someone who is similar to you, there’s no denying that being with someone different can help you to grow in important ways.

However, when we explore the psychology behind attraction, does the evidence suggest that opposites do attract? Or, is this a mistaken assumption that we make about romance? We’ll look at some of the most powerful reasons why opposites attract in relationships (when they do). Then, we will delve into what science has to say about the underlying motivations that influence our attractions.

Why Opposites Attract In Relationships

Most people date a wide range of people in their lifetime, some of them for the short term and others for years. For the majority of individuals, at least some of these relationships are special and transformative, offering crucial life experience even if the partnership ultimately ends.

Often, when discussing dating history, people have particularly strong memories of times when they were with someone who seemed like their polar opposite. This often presents some significant challenges and may prove to be unsustainable over the longer term, but it can also be an emotionally rich, educational choice.

So, is it true that opposites attract in most cases? Here are five reasons to think they might, which also highlight some of the most exciting advantages of being with someone different. Regardless what science has to say about how the average case of attraction works, it seems like just about everyone should try dating their opposite at some point.

1. They Challenge Your Ideals

By the time we’ve reached adulthood, many of us have developed a core set of ideals that we no longer challenge. When we’re with people who are similar to us, we don’t tend to reflect on these basic beliefs, values, and expectations.

On the other hand, when we make a connection with someone who is our opposite, we are suddenly prompted to reexamine the things that we previously took for granted. If we value this individual’s judgment and respect their intelligence, we naturally begin to question what we once simply assumed was true.

Of course, this clash of ideals can lead to conflict. In turn, this can make it difficult to decide how to live a shared life.

However, if you and your partner can push through this, you may emerge with more self-knowledge and an updated set of beliefs that actually better suits your present self. At the very least, you’ll develop more empathy for other perspectives.

(FREE GIFT! Get my new, official, Law Of Attraction love toolkit today, sign up for free and get loads of resources, advice, and worksheets. Click here now to find out more.)

2. You’ll Constantly Be Introduced To New Things

Once again, there are undeniable perks to spending time with people who are similar to you. You’ll enjoy lots of the same things; it will be easy to plan time together; there will be a reduced need for compromise.

The downside is that you might just end up repeating the same habits and hobbies until a level of boredom and routine habits. This can stagnate growth and can make the relationship less stimulating as well.

In contrast, if you’re paired up with your opposite, they’ll always be introducing you to new activities and new ways of being. If you’re open-minded and trusting, you can end up going to places you’d never otherwise have visited. You may even end up acquiring skills you may never have planned to develop.

Meanwhile, you can offer this to the other person too! You can enjoy the satisfaction of knowing that you’re constantly broadening someone else’s world.

3. They Always Have A Fresh Outlook

When you seek advice, it’s likely that you often gravitate toward people who intuitively understand you. Consequently, many of these people will also be similar to you in basic ways. While they’ll know what you want and be able to shift into your perspective very easily, they also can’t offer you that much beyond your own thinking.

Seeking the advice of someone who differs from you affords you a chance to think completely differently. This is especially useful when you have exhausted all your usual strategies and solutions.

Having a polar opposite partner means direct access to someone who looks at your situation in an utterly new way, offering thoughts and ideas that simply wouldn’t occur to you given the way you usually think. You can offer the same, which makes the two of you a formidable duo. Between your respective minds, there’s very little that won’t occur to you when you encounter a problem.

4. You Complement Each Other

When you think about whether opposites attract, couples who complement each other may quickly come to mind. The potential for complementary traits is another major advantage of dating someone who seems like your opposite.

It can help you to create a wonderful sense of balance, compensating for each other’s weak spots and highlighting what you both bring to the relationship. For example, you might be extremely polite, and your partner might have difficulty holding their tongue. Between you, you’ll likely figure out how much to complain about when some kind of injustice is done to you!

Complementary traits can provide deeper benefits, too. If you’re optimistic and you have a partner who is pessimistic, you can make more realistic assessments of the world (and potential choices) by putting your heads together. You may even find that you have complementary skill sets. For example, one of you may be very physically capable while you have sharper reasoning skills.

5. Genetics Tell Us To

Finally, there are good reasons to suppose that our genetics encourage us to approach and pursue people who are very different from us.

In particular, studies suggest that we are often more attracted to people who have different immune systems. We all have certain genes that play a role in how well we fight off bacterial and viral infections.

Interestingly, we may be able to subconsciously detect people who are better at fighting off different infections. The evolutionary explanation here is that if we pair up with people who fall into this category, we may maximize our chances of having children who have robust immune systems.

In experiments exploring this theory, scientists concluded that how attractive we find a partner’s scent is partly determined by immune system compatibility. Of course, this difference doesn’t necessarily translate to personality differences. However, it may help to explain that initial strong attraction we feel to certain individuals.

Birds Of A Feather Flock Together…?

Now, in spite of the popularity of the “opposites attract theory” and the fact that most of us probably do believe that difference is attractive, there’s compelling evidence to the contrary. According to science, opposites attract less often than similarity attracts. While the latest research doesn’t indicate that we’re looking for someone who is just identical to us in every way, studies on the online behavior of over 45,000 people shows that people who behave similarly (at least on the Internet) are more likely to connect romantically.

What explains this?

There are a few relevant factors in play.

Firstly, comfort is key. When we’re with people who have a similar background, career, level of education and political affiliation, we tend to feel like we can relax and be ourselves.

In addition, it’s very validating to meet an attractive person who seems similar to us. It can boost our own confidence levels, and make us feel understood. This is especially true if we meet someone who shares idiosyncratic tastes or interests. Many couples report that this type of connection immediately felt special. So, to a certain extent, we’re looking for ourselves in others.

The reasonable conclusion to draw is that we work best with people who are not entirely similar to us and not completely different. Difference helps us grow! However, too much of it makes it hard to understand our partners.

In turn, this can lead to stalemates when trying to decide what your future life should look like. In sum, don’t rule out someone who seems like your opposite. But, be sure there’s at least some common ground to work with!

The post Do Opposites Attract? The Psychological Explanation appeared first on The Law Of Attraction.



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Do you experience a lot of negative thinking in your daily life? Maybe you find it hard to think positively and change your negative thoughts? This is a common problem and affects many of us, but it is possible to overcome it.

It can be hard to know how to stop your negative thinking from happening or becoming worse, but there are ways that you can do this. First, it’s worth knowing why we have negative thoughts and the impact they can have.

Why Do We Have Negative Thoughts?

Some people experience negative thinking due to anxiety or stress – this can often heighten the negative thoughts. This is because, when you are stressed or anxious, you are more likely to see the negative side of things and think of worst case scenarios.

We can also have a lot of negative thoughts when we worry about the future or past too. If you are thinking of things that can go wrong or worrying about something that hasn’t happened yet, this can cause repetitive overthinking.

Negative thoughts can occur when you are feeling low or having a bad day too. This could cause you to feel bad about yourself, blame yourself and point out the negatives. If this continues every day, this can lead to a low mood or depression – so it’s important to learn how to overcome negative thoughts.

clearingnegativity

5 Automatic Negative Thought Examples

Before we discuss ways that you can overcome your negative thoughts, it’s probably best to talk about the types of automatic negative thoughts most of us have.

These are all quite common examples and can differ for each person, but you may be able to relate to some, if not all, of them. It’s good to be able to recognize them when they occur so that you can work towards overcoming them straight away.

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1. Mind Reading

One type of negative thinking is ‘mind-reading’. This is where we automatically think that we know what others are thinking. For example, maybe someone ignored a text message from you.

A negative mind reading thought would be: ‘They are ignoring me because they are mad at me.’ This is a thought where, despite the other person not telling you how they are feeling directly, you believe that you know what they are thinking.

This can be damaging as you may start to put yourself down and distance yourself from friends or family over something that might not be true. If you can learn to not jump to conclusions and ask people how they feel directly, it could save you from a lot of unnecessary stress.

2. Guilty Thinking

Another type of negative thinking is guilt thinking. This is where we use words such as ‘should’, ‘must’, and ‘if only’ when talking about mistakes or things we have done.

Even though you can’t change the past, it doesn’t always stop our minds from thinking and dwelling over it. People normally experience guilty thinking when they are dwelling over mistakes that they have made.

For example, you might say ‘I should have gone to the gym today.’, and this could cause you to feel guilty for not going to the gym and you may start putting yourself down. Instead of using guilty thinking, try and say ‘I didn’t go to the gym today, but that’s OK. There’s always tomorrow.’

This way, you are acknowledging what happened in a positive way and you aren’t making yourself feel guilty for not going either. If you start to hear guilty thinking creeping in, try and change the narrative and throw the feelings of guilt away.

3. Fortune Telling

Fortune Telling is a type of automatic negative thinking where you predict the worst outcome that could happen. When you focus on situations that you will have in the future, you are likely to presume the worst and think something awful is going to happen.

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If you had a job interview, for example, this type of negative thinking might cause you to think something like: ‘I am not going to get this job. I just know I’m going to mess up and be too nervous.’ This is fortune telling; you are predicting the worst possible outcome for a situation that hasn’t even happened yet.

This is a bad habit to have, as it can actually cause you to stop striving for your goals, take any risks or believe in yourself. Fortune telling can have a huge impact on your self-esteem and the best thing to do is know that you can’t predict the future, and there are so many possible outcomes, that it’s not worth worrying about.

(This isn’t as easy as it sounds, however, I will be sharing my top tips to overcome negative thinking down below.)

4. Comparisons

In today’s society, it can become so much easier to compare ourselves to others, especially through social media. Everyone uploads there best pictures and stories, which can sometimes leave us feeling deflated and jealous.

When you start comparing yourself to others, with thoughts such as, ‘She looks so much prettier than me’, or ‘They have everything going for them, what do I have?’, it can be incredibly easy to develop a low mood and feel depressed.

Something that is always worth remembering is that everyone has flaws, and no one’s life is perfect. If you can look at yourself in a positive light and remember that other people have difficulties and things they aren’t happy about too, this can make it easier to try and stay positive.

5. Blaming

Another common type of negative thinking is blaming, you blame yourself or others for problems or mistakes that happen. This can cause you to feel like you are a failure and you can bring yourself down, causing low mood.

You may find that when any little or big thing that happens, you blame yourself for. It can be hard to look at things from a different perspective, but it can really help you to change your way of thinking to a positive view.

On the other hand, you might also find that you are blaming others for your problems and not taking any of the responsibility for yourself. This can also be just as harmful as blaming yourself, as you can jump to conclusions and possibly lose friendships too.

This can be an especially negative way of thinking if you are blaming others, as you might find it difficult to try changing your situation and looking at things from a different view.

How To Overcome Negative Thoughts

Now that we know the different types of automatic negative thinking, it’s time to discuss the different things you can do to overcome it. This doesn’t mean that you will entirely get rid off negative thinking; it’s something that everyone will go through.

However, there are ways that you can challenge and overcome your negative thinking when they do appear. So, you know how to recognize negative thinking – read on to find out what to do when they occur.

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1. Meditation

Meditation can be a really great way to refocus your mind and bring attention to the present moment and how you feel. It can help to bring you back to the moment, so it can be a great practice to do if you are in the middle of having automatic negative thoughts and can’t seem to stop them.

Meditation can be very relaxing and the way it works is that if any negative thoughts appear while you are meditating, you let them in and then let them go. You recognize they are there, but you don’t give them any attention and focus on your breathing.

If you are having negative thoughts and can spare 10 minutes or so, try to meditate and focus on your breathing to help calm you down and take your attention away from the negative thoughts.

2. Reframe Your Thinking

When you are aware that the negative thoughts are coming up, you can then start to try and reframe them. Maybe you could ask yourself why you might be having these thoughts? Is it because of something else that’s happened? Is there any way you can look at it from a different perspective?

Another way that you can reframe your negative thoughts is to try and change the narrative. For example, if you have a thought such as ‘I’m going to fail this exam today.’, instead, reframe it in a more positive way: ‘I know I’m worried about failing this exam, but as long as I try my best, that’s all that matters.’

If you can start to reframe your negative thoughts, it can really help you to put things into perspective and change your thinking to a more positive language.

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3. Surround Yourself With Positive People

Have you ever had a group of friends that put you down? Or made comments that were unhelpful and negative? It can really influence your own thinking and how you view yourself too.

Surrounding yourself with positive people can help to also change your own negative thinking. If you are feeling down, supportive friends and family can offer advice and give you a different view on what it is you are worried about.

You don’t want people around you who feed your negative thinking, as this can just make things worse for you. Make sure you surround yourself with positive, supportive people who can lift you up and not bring you down.

4. Make A Gratitude List

You may have already heard about gratitude lists if you have an interest in the Law of Attraction, and they are great for many different reasons. When you write down things that you are thankful for, you are constantly focusing on good, positive things in your life for that time.

You can also use gratitude lists to write positive things about yourself as well. Focus on the good things about yourself, for example, that you are caring or supportive. Write down all of your positive traits.

This can help you to only focus on the positives and not the negative thoughts you may have been experiencing before. You could do this once you have woken up before you go to bed, or even start writing when you are having negative thoughts.

5. Use Affirmations

Again, you may also be familiar with affirmations. Affirmations are statements that we can say to ourselves to keep us in a positive mood and show ourselves self-love and positive energy. This can really help if you are feeling particularly negative one day.

You could use affirmations such as ‘I am feeling positive and I know I am going to have a good day.’ or ‘I will spread positivity to others and also to myself.’ If you can do this, it can truly help to squash any negativity you might be facing.

Whenever you decide to say your affirmations, try to really believe in what you are saying and focus on the positive feelings you get too.

clearingnegativityOvercome Negative Thinking Today

The free ebook ‘Clearing Negativity From Your Life’ can help you to recognize your own limiting beliefs and find the cause of what could be keeping you in a cycle of negative thinking.

There are many reasons why you may be surrounded by negativity; it can be from the people you surround yourself with; your environment; the way that you perceive and talk to yourself.

Our free ebook can help you to understand that you have a limitless potential and that you can clear negativity from your life.

Click here to get your free copy of the ‘Clearing Negativity From Your Life’ ebook today.

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There are many reasons why you might feel broken inside. Maybe you’re struggling with a bereavement or a painful breakup. Or, perhaps you’ve lost your job or ended a significant friendship. No matter what has caused that broken feeling, it’s likely that you struggle to see a positive future for yourself and that you seldom get any joy from your days. You may have lost your sense of self, and believe that all of your efforts have come to nothing.

If you constantly worry that you feel broken and lost in this way, you may worry that there’s no way you’ll ever feel better. The good news is that although it is undeniably awful to feel devastated and adrift, there are ways to move through this experience and come out the other side. In this guide, we’ll explore eight things worth remembering when you feel broken inside, showing you how to apply this advice to your own life throughout.

8 Things to Remember When You Feel Broken Inside

Before we move on to the key messages that can help you recover, it’s important to note that feeling broken isn’t a sign that you should give up on your goals or on your happiness. We all go through periods where we feel broken, sometimes beyond repair. It is a deeply human experience because our lives are often shaped by chance encounters and unpredictable changes.

Entering a phase of brokenness simply means that a significant obstacle has been put in your way and that you need to spend a sustained amount of time processing this recent experience so that you can figure out what it means for your future. This is true whether you have in some way lost a person, an opportunity, a role or an aspect of your health.

In addition, hold onto the idea that there are plenty of scopes to learn, from what you’re going through. While it may not seem like it now, it’s highly likely that your current experiences are shaping you in a way that will ultimately lead you in a positive new direction. Trust that you can and will move through this pain, recover your resilience and find ways to be happy again.

1. Do Not Reject Or Bury Your Feelings

When you’re feeling broken, there’s often a temptation to push your emotions away because they’re so painful. You may even be ashamed of some of your feelings, perhaps believing that they’re an indication of weakness.

In fact, we all feel sadness, anger, and regret, and some things that happen to us naturally elicit these sorts of emotions. So, accept your feelings rather than rejecting them. Trust that they are warranted.

Another reason why it’s important to engage with your feelings is that you can’t make them disappear. When you repress or refuse to acknowledge them, you don’t get rid of them but rather just put them to one side to fester. In most cases, you’ll be at risk of these feelings exploding out of you unbidden, and it may be harder to deal with them when that happens. On the contrary, when you accept your feelings you have the choice to work through them consciously.

2. Everything Is Temporary

Nothing is permanent, even feeling broken inside. All of our lives are a series of up and down moments and are guaranteed to contain both misery and joy. When you are old, you’ll likely look back on the hard times with a measure of nostalgia, as you’ll be able to see how they played a role in shaping the person you became. We often forget just how short life is, and just how temporary all of our experiences really are.

When you’re feeling broken, quotes like “This too shall pass” can be turned into affirming mantras that you repeat when you are overcome by sadness. Repeating this type of phrase to yourself can help you to believe that your distress is fleeting. Similarly, looking back at previous hardships can put this one in context, helping you to see this as a blip in your life rather than a permanent state of affairs.

3. You Can Ask For Help

You may be embarrassed to admit that you can’t cope alone, or find the idea of sharing frightening. However, when you’re hurting at a deep level, it can make the world of difference if you’re willing to speak up and say you need support.

When you keep all of your thoughts and feelings inside, they become bigger than they are and it can be very difficult to gain perspective on your situation. In contrast, talking to someone helps you to share some of the load, and allows you to take advantage of other peoples’ problem-solving abilities.

When choosing who to ask for help, think about the most emotionally mature, compassionate people in your life. And if you want anonymity, consider working with a counselor to explore and move on from your feeling of brokenness.

4. Remember You Have Control

It’s easy to feel helpless when your spirit is broken. You may think you’re just being buffeted along by life, and that you have no power to shape your future. However, it’s vital that you believe you have a measure of control over your situation. While you can’t change the past, you have some power over the way in which you respond to that past, and you have a whole lot of power over what your future looks like.

Instead of solely obsessing about what you can’t change, turn some of your attention to the question of what choices are currently available to you. Canvas all of your options, no matter how initially unappealing or implausible. Then, try to make at least one decision that underlines your personal autonomy. Doing so will remind you that you are not helpless or inert and that many of life’s avenues are still wide open for you.

5. Accept Change

When you feel broken inside, it’s often because life has changed in a way that you don’t like. When such events take someone or something important away from you, it’s natural that your kneejerk response is to fear and loathe the idea of change. However, change is inevitable, and when you use your energy fighting it, you only stoke feelings of anger, helplessness, and disappointment.

Instead of fighting change tooth and nail, try to accept it and realize what it can do for you. After all, it is only through necessary change that you’ll become happier, more satisfied or more fulfilled. It may be helpful to make a short list of some of the biggest positive changes in your past. This will help you to see that change can be a force for good, and begin to break some of the negative associations that may be holding you back from moving on.

6. You Are Living In The Now

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Once again, being fully present can be hard when you feel broken; you might find yourself focused on the past, or keeping your attention occupied so you don’t have to experience the moment. However, taking in what is going on (inside and outside of yourself) is one of the most effective ways of learning from your loss and creating a fulfilling future. When you are fully present, you can accept and process feelings as they come, and this can give your self-knowledge a huge boost.

If you struggle to live in the moment, consider taking up a daily mindfulness practice. You don’t need to do an elaborate meditation if you don’t want to. Simply focusing on your breathing for ten minutes can make a difference. Scanning down your body (from head to toe) can also be an effective mindfulness exercise, highlighting areas of tension and helping you to engage with the conflicting feelings that might be inside you.

7. Remember What You Have To Be Grateful For

When you’re feeling broken, meaning can be hard to find. You might have the sense that you’re just an unlucky person, your mind constantly replaying all the worst things that have happened to you. Although it might sound counterintuitive, try your best to remember what you feel genuinely grateful for in your life. The more you’re able to do this, the more hope and healing you’ll cultivate.

If you struggle to come up with big things that inspire gratitude, don’t worry. Focus on the little things that bring you joy, no matter how inconsequential you might think they are. Think about your favorite songs, the best books you’ve ever read, the most beautiful things you’ve seen.

Think about what you love to eat, the relationships you’ve cherished, and the places you’ve visited. Anything that you can do to connect with the brighter, more hospitable parts of the world will help you.

8. You Can Grow From This

Finally, when you feel broken, try to remember that difficult life events often facilitate positive personal development in the long run. It’s natural that right now, you sometimes wonder if life will always be this hard and this sad. It’s difficult to hold hope in your heart when you have had your confidence or happiness knocked in a fundamental way. That said, if you can find it in yourself to look for positives then you’ll thank yourself at a later date.

Finding reasons to be optimistic or hopeful doesn’t mean invalidating the pain you’ve been through. It simply reflects a willingness to see that everything in life has more than one side. And if you can’t bring yourself to be positive about the future just yet, at least give some consideration to how you’ve grown throughout this period of your life. The lessons you are facing now might be some of the most important you’ll ever learn.

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A lot of attention is devoted to the destructive relationships you can have with significant others. However, the truth is that a negative friendship can cause just as much damage. Certain friends can be just as abusive as lovers. As you may know from experience, destructive friendships can ruin self-esteem, break hearts and lead to painful isolation.

But what exactly does a healthy friendship look like, and what do you do when you realize that your current dynamic doesn’t meet these standards?

It can be incredibly difficult to sever ties with someone you care about, even when they’ve hurt you very deeply. This guide will help you to identify toxic friendships and bring them to an appropriate conclusion. First, we’ll explore unhealthy friendship characteristics so that you can compare them to your own dynamics. Then, we’ll move on to look at how to end an unhealthy friendship and move on to something better.

Signs Of A Toxic Friend

So, you have a friendship that’s making you uncomfortable or unhappy in some way, and you want to know if this is just part and parcel of a close relationship or if you’re stuck in a negative cycle. To check with toxicity, look out for the following signs of an unhealthy friendship. If you recognize more than just a handful, chances are high that you have a destructive bond with someone. You can also use these to help yourself answer the question “Am I a toxic friend?”.

  • Your other friends and family don’t like or trust the person.
  • They’re self-involved.
  • You repeatedly let them treat you badly.
  • They belittle you and your accomplishments.
  • They’re jealous of your successes.
  • There is a lack of empathy and understanding.
  • You feel exhausted after you spend time together.
  • They spread things you’ve said in confidence.
  • There is inconsistency; they will be loving, then dismissive.
  • They romanticize your friendship online to get attention.

5 Tips For Ending A Toxic Friendship

Getting rid of toxic friends can be a real challenge and can bring up some intense emotions. After all, you might reason that this person is good for you some of the time, or that you share a rich history together.

In addition, you might worry about what they’ll do if you separate yourself from them; you might be aware that you’re likely to take them back into your life if they apologize.

Further, you are bound to have worries about a shared social circle. In this way, you might also be anxious about how to avoid creating similarly toxic friendships in the future.

Now that you’ve familiarized yourself with the main toxic friendship symptoms, let’s look at how to end a toxic friendship. As you’ll see, the trick is to have a clear plan for what you’re doing, why you’re doing it, what you’ll say and how you’ll strengthen your resolve to sever ties.

1. Ask Yourself Some Tough Questions

The first step in ending an unhealthy friendship is to come to terms with the fact that it’s the right thing to do. You can help yourself to move past feelings of ambivalence and indecision by asking some tough questions about the nature of the friendship.

For example, take another look at the above signs of toxic friendship that you just identified in your own life. Do you really want to have a friend who deliberately holds you back from being your best self? What opportunities in work, life, and other areas might you be able to enjoy if this person wasn’t trying to limit you?

Similarly, ask yourself what you are actually getting from this dynamic. Maybe you laugh with this person sometimes, but when balanced against hurt, disappointment or cruelty it’s obvious that the costs outweigh the benefits. It can also be helpful to contrast this friendship with ones in which you’ve genuinely thrived.

P.S. If you need a helping hand in boosting your self-confidence, be sure to download your copy of ‘Affirmation Sensation‘ to awaken your mind for positive change.

2. Form A Script And Practice It

Given the unhealthy power dynamic that exists in toxic friendships, you might feel anxious or even scared of the inevitable confrontation you will have to have. This is why stage two of ending a friendship, forming a script, is absolutely essential for building confidence and working towards closure.

The best way to approach writing this script is to let all your thoughts out first. Write without filtering, allowing all thoughts and emotions to come through. Not all of this will be appropriate or useful to pass on when talking to your friend, so look at your words and pick out phrases and themes that you do want to communicate.

Next, work them into a more carefully written speech. Practice this in front of the mirror a few times, making changes as you see fit. Do your best to have most of your words memorized by the time you speak to the person.

3. Identify Your Role In Toxic Relationships

If you’re like most people, this won’t be your first toxic friendship. It’s likely that you have a pattern of getting involved in unhealthy dynamics, and now is the perfect time to explore why that is (as well as how to change it).

Look at your history, and think of as many unhealthy relationships as you remember, then consider the common denominators. For example, you might see that you are often attracted to charismatic, controlling people because it absolves you of the responsibility for making decisions. Alternatively, you might realize that you learned in early life that it was your “job” to meet everyone’s needs; not to prioritize or consider your own.

While you will still need to do work to avoid getting into toxic friendships again in the future, simply being aware of your patterns can do a lot to prevent you from repeating them. In some cases, psychotherapy can also be useful here.

4. Be Clear With Your Intentions

Like a romantic breakup, a friendship breakup can be incredibly messy if you don’t approach it in a clear way. This means that part of your aforementioned script has to involve being fully transparent about the boundaries you are putting in place. No matter how uncomfortable or painful it feels, you need to find a way to say that the friendship is ending; you don’t want to spend any more time together, and you won’t be staying in touch.

It may be tempting to throw blame around at this point or to get sucked into a horrible argument about the post. To minimize the chances of this, make sure you use “I” statements. Instead of saying “You’ve been an awful friend!” say something like “I feel this friendship is no longer working for me the way it used to” or “I’ve found our interactions increasingly negative or difficult, and I think we’re better off going our separate ways.”

5. Block Them On Social Media

Finally, remember that it’s harder than ever before to properly distance ourselves from other people. It will be easy, and often tempting, for you to keep tabs on your former friend through social networking sites. Likewise, your ex-friend could easily end up sending you a message either asking you for another chance or outright abusing you.

Now that you’ve set boundaries with this person, reinforce them by cutting ties online as well. This should not only involve actions like unfriending or unfollowing; blocking your former friend is the cleanest, most effective way to remove them from your life. Remember to block their email address as well as social networking sites, and consider simply ignoring any messages that other people try to pass on from this person.

While it’s normal to experience feelings of loss, regret and even guilt, remember that you’re breaking up with this friend for a very good reason. In time, it will be increasingly obvious that you are better off.

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If you’re reasonably familiar with the Law of Attraction, you’ll already know that your unique vibration plays an important role in whether you’re able to manifest what you want. However, you may not know how to tell when your vibration is changing, or how to tell whether a change in vibration is positive or negative. And since a lot of manifestation work focuses on working from within, you might not have spent much time thinking about how the world around you impacts your vibration.

In this guide to vibrational shifts, we’ll give you the tools to better understand your own vibration. We’ll explore energy shift symptoms, helping you to identify key moments when you are going through significant changes. In many cases, these changes will be in response to important changes in the universe more broadly, and learning how to respond to these shifts can improve your ability to attract what you want in life.

What Is An Energy Shift?

In order to establish a definition of energy shifts, we first have to understand that all beings are made of energy, as is everything around us in the Universe. When there is an energy shift, there is a quantifiable physical change in the Universe. This shift can occur around you (e.g. in the environment, in other individuals), and it can also occur inside you.

Most people aren’t adept at noticing energy shifts, even when their thoughts, feelings, and experiences are impacted by them. However, with training and reflection, you can learn to notice the kinds of patterns that indicate important shifts.

One major benefit of being more attuned to energy shifts is that this helps you to differentiate between your own emotions and feelings that are reactions to emotions in the collective consciousness that surrounds you. Like everyone else, you are part of that collective consciousness! Your life experiences impact on this consciousness just as it impacts on your life experiences. As your understanding of energy shifts increased, you will find yourself easily identifying ripples in the collective stream. Often, they are responses to great tragedies or important scientific discoveries, but people experience these responses before the major event takes place.

Why Your Vibration May Change

As noted above, your vibration may often change because of energy shifts at the Universal level. For example, vibrations often lower at the time of a terrorist attack or a natural disaster, and vibrations generally increase when the world at large has good cause to feel optimistic about humanity’s future.

However, alongside these global events, there are also other reasons why your vibration might change.

5 Reasons For Vibrational Change

  • Changes in phases of the moon: If you keep an eye on the phases of the moon, you may begin to notice a pattern in how you feel and how effective your manifestation is. The full moon often exerts a particularly powerful influence on energy shifts. Click here now to discover our tips for moon rituals!
  • Solar flares and eclipses: Solar flares and eclipses can sometimes elicit the same response as the full moon, though the energy shift may be even more pronounced. Collective consciousness shifts are also more common at the time of eclipses. Therefore, you can plan around these if you want to affect large-scale positive change.
  • Kundalini awakening:A Kundalini awakening can occur at the time of new spiritual realizations or personal revelations. Some people report this occurrence in conjunction with a near-death experience, or anything else that prompts a reevaluation of values, goals, and purpose.
  • Personal elevations in consciousness: You can facilitate a consciousness “upgrade” by way of any type of spiritual work, including the work you do with the Law of Attraction. As you become more attuned to the Universe and more aware of your power to attract and repel specific things, you may feel resulting energy shifts that open you up to new possibilities.
  • Significant changes in your own life: If you get married or divorced, end an old career or move to a new country, an energy shift inevitably follows. Changes in roles (e.g. from partner to parent) have the same effect.

8 Signs Of An Energy Shift In The Universe

Although we’ve canvassed some of the main reasons why a vibrational shift might occur, it’s worth noting that none of these things are guaranteed to cause such a shift (and when they do cause shifts, they may be subtle). Consequently, it’s important to know the major signs of energy shifts, so that you can make the right connections.

Here are the eight most common signs of energy shifts in the universe, along with descriptions of how they might appear in your life. Depending on the level and nature of the shift, you may recognize one or more at any given time.

1. A Sudden Change In Mood

Your sudden change in mood may be negative, positive or somewhere in between. For example, you may experience free-floating anxiety and be confused about its source. Alternatively, you may feel lighter, more certain that everything will turn out well.

Some people also report repeated mood swings rather than just one shift in mood. So, you might move from happy to sad and back again.

Short tempers are also common, with everyday irritations feeling impossible to deal with. Keeping a basic daily mood diary can help you track the progress of this sign, which can thereby help you track a vibrational shift.

2. Hypersensitivity

When you or the world around you begins to experience an ascension energy update, hypersensitivity is extremely common (and can be difficult to manage).

In a lot of cases, this sensitivity will impact all of your senses. So, noises will seem louder, lights will seem brighter, and smells will be stronger. You may find yourself intolerant of busy, hectic places and feel an urge to retreat.

Sometimes, this hypersensitivity also affects the skin, making you sensitive to scratchy materials or to changes in temperature. As you adjust to the energy shift, your heightened senses should gradually return to normal.

3. Increased Compassion

Increased compassion is one of the most noteworthy higher vibration symptoms and one of the greatest benefits attached to vibrational shifts. This spike in compassion will make you more empathetic in all of your interactions and may promote unusually generous behaviors.

For example, you might stop to help a stranger, consider adopting a rescue animal, or sign up to do volunteer work. You may also find yourself able to practice more self-compassion, taking time out to recharge and to treat yourself kindly. Often, a vibrational shift will cause increased compassion in a whole community, creating a contagious wave of kindness.

4. You Have Strong Urges

A vibrational shift can come with an increase in the intensity of all your desires, broadly construed. Sometimes, this will mean simply feeling more motivated to pursue the things you already thought of as very important. This can make the time of vibrational shifts especially productive.

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In other cases, you may be surprised by new urges to change direction; you might suddenly feel passionate about a new hobby, start looking at a different career or begin viewing a friend in a more romantic light. Trust these impulses, as vibrational shifts enhance intuition and can help guide you towards your true purpose.

If you believe you may be having a vibrational shift, you should consult your own Intention Point. As an exercise, connecting with your heart energy could help you master The Law Of Attraction. Consequently, this can help you increase your vibrational frequency. My ebook goes into this more thoroughly, detailed concrete tips and techniques.

Click here now to download my ebook, The Secret Law Of Attraction: Master The Power Of Intention!

5. Physical Changes And Flu-like Symptoms

The physical changes that come with energy shifts include changes in what you feel like eating, as well as spikes in your own energy. However, it’s also common for vibrational shifts to induce flu-like symptoms that never really develop into a full-blown illness.

For example, you may have a gnawing headache around your temples, your body may ache, and it is possible to develop sore eyes or blurry vision. Migraine sufferers might notice an increase in attacks during the time of a vibrational shift, too. Once again, these apparent signs of illness will disappear as you adjust to the change in energy.

6. Time Feels Different

While vibrational shifts don’t literally induce time travel, they can lead to a strange change in your perception of time. For example, if you create a spiritual vibration level chart and track the time you spend on different projects each day, you might start to notice that hours feel shorter or longer than you’d expect. Some people report many hours passing by without any real awareness of time moving, while others note that a day has the quality you would normally associate with a week.

Sometimes, this shift in time perception influences your sleep too, leaving you feeling unrested or groggy.

7. Energy Levels Fluctuate

Perhaps unsurprisingly, your own bodily energy levels can fluctuate when the universe’s energy is changing. It’s common to either feel supercharged and wide awake all the time or to feel listless and exhausted no matter how much you rest.

Further, these two states of being may alternate during a period of vibrational shift, which can make it difficult to plan the day ahead! In many cases, whether you experience a spike or dip in energy, it can be a good indicator of whether there has been a positive vibrational shift in the universe. For example, tragedies can lead to a community-wide sense of lethargy.

8. Visions

Finally, when there’s a large shift in the energy of the universe, we can see or hear things that aren’t really there. Sometimes, you might be tempted to dismiss these as unimportant. For example, when you think you see an insect and turn out to be mistaken.

However, these “visions” we see can have great symbolic significance.

You may also notice that you have much more vivid dreams during a time of vibrational shift. Imbued in these dreams may be deeper meanings than usual. Write them down when you can remember them, and consider what they might indicate about your life’s purpose.

The post What Is A Vibrational Shift? Energy Shift Symptoms Checklist appeared first on The Law Of Attraction.



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Have you ever wanted to begin your Law of Attraction and manifestation journey, only to find that you are not sure where to start? It can be daunting to try and use the Law of Attraction with no help – which is why I created 5 Law of Attraction worksheets to share with you that should make things a lot easier.

Here are some of our best Law of Attraction worksheets that you can use to help you manifest your best life. They are easy to use and available for you to download now.

It doesn’t matter if you are brand new to the Law of Attraction, or if you are just wanting to enhance your journey – these worksheets are recommended for everyone!

Download These 5 Free Law of Attraction Worksheets

When you use the Law of Attraction in your own life, manifestation plays a vital role. When you manifest something, you are intentionally creating things and bringing them into your life.

For example, if you can focus on money and becoming financially stable, visualizing yourself having more money and maybe even writing yourself a dream check, you are manifesting more money into your life.

Just like if you focus negatively on something or worry about something bad happening, you could also be manifesting it into your life. This is why it’s important to know what you want and look at it in a positive light when manifesting.

These worksheets could seriously help you with your manifestation and Law of Attraction journey.

Worksheet 1: Law of Attraction Action Plan: 60 Day Simple Guide

This simple 8-week guide can help you to use the Law of Attraction to manifest and achieve your goals in life. Over the 8 week period, you will have an action plan to follow each week.

All of these steps are simple ways to help you incorporate the Law of Attraction and manifestation into your life.

They should also help you to achieve your goals and, by the end of the 8 weeks, help you to reflect on how far you’ve come since the beginning.

Ready to begin? Click here to download this free Law of Attraction action plan, and in this worksheet you will be given guidance on the following steps:

  • Finding your life purpose
  • Crafting a vision
  • Setting big goals
  • Creating a step-by-step plan
  • Programming your mind for success
  • Creating positive habits
  • Taking action steps
  • Learning to let go

Worksheet 2: 30 Day Manifestation Plan

Another great and easy way to manifest things into your life is to have a guide that helps you to manifest every single day… and that’s exactly what I’ve created!

With my 30-day manifestation plan, you can use it just like a calendar – with things to do each day that can help you to achieve your goals.

With morning and evening rituals to do each day too, you can be confident that this plan has everything you need to help you on your manifestation journey.

Is this the kind of game plan you’ve been looking for? Click here to download this free Law of Attraction manifestation plan and receive guidance on the following steps:

  • Affirmations that connect to your goals
  • Writing a gratitude journal
  • Creating a positive environment
  • Setting your goals
  • Identifying limiting beliefs
  • Living ‘as if…’
  • Visualizing your goals and dreams
  • Finding and using opportunities that come your way

Worksheet 3: 7 Day Step-By-Step Manifestation Plan

This manifestation plan can be a great way for you to find and intensify your intentions. As this is going to be a short 7-day plan, you should be able to focus on your intentions and manifestations more vividly.

This plan will not only help you to choose what you would like to manifest, but it can also help you to make little changes to your daily life that can help to enhance the manifestations.

You should also find day six of my 7-day step by step manifestation plan very helpful too, as I help you to look for real opportunities in your life that can help to make your manifestations a reality.

So here is another gift for you to get started, get your free step-by-step to-do list and receive the guidance with the following steps:

  • Choosing what to manifest
  • Being able to come up with a set of positive affirmations
  • Practicing creative visualizations
  • Acting ‘as if’
  • Making a gratitude list
  • Finding opportunities and inspiration in your daily life

Worksheet 4: 24 Hour Law of Attraction Daily Routine

Having a daily routine that focuses on the Law of Attraction can be an extremely effective way to manifest.

This routine gives you different things to focus on throughout your day that can help to enhance your manifestations.

Being able to set aside time in your day to use Law of Attraction tools can really help you improve your chances of receiving your manifestations.

As you can imagine, being able to use these Law of Attraction tools throughout your whole day should enhance this even more.

Would this guide help you?

Click here to download this free Law of Attraction daily routine guide, learn more about:

  • Visualization
  • Goal planning
  • Spreading positive energy
  • Meditation
  • Using a gratitude journal

Worksheet 5: Manifesting Money: An Execution Plan

The last worksheet that I have for you focuses on manifesting money.

If you would like to improve your financial situation, this execution plan can help you to use action items within a timeline to focus on your goals and work on your financial manifestations.

This plan puts everything into three simple topics for you, including, the goal, the timing, and the tools. The steps are all set out in the same way and all include tips to help you, which should make this plan easy to use.

If you would like to improve your financial situation and work on enhancing your money manifestations than this execution plan can help. You can click here to download this free Law of Attraction manifesting money execution plan, and learn to:

  • Get rid of limiting beliefs
  • Set a clear intention
  • Respect and love money
  • Tune into your intuition
  • Let go and trust the Universe

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In science fiction and fantasy stories, empaths are able to detect and understand the emotions of people around them. So, are empaths real? As it turns out, there is credible scientific evidence of empaths. Intense empathy isn’t supernatural. Rather, it’s an evolved form of intuition that may relate to a range of biological and psychological differences between you and other individuals. While there are undoubtedly enormous benefits to being an empath, there are also significant struggles associated with this skillset.

If you have high levels of empathy, they must be carefully managed in order to prevent burnout. This guide will help you understand what being an empath means and can help you learn how to tell whether you are one of them. We’ll also explore the latest scientific research on empaths, such as studies revolving around mirror neurons in humans. These studies may be able to shed light on why some people develop in this unique way.

What Are Empaths?

In a nutshell, empaths are individuals who pick up and absorb the emotions of others around them. Sometimes described in terms of reading another person’s energy, this skill comes to the fore both in close relationships and in superficial interactions with strangers. This high level of sensitivity means that empaths are highly capable of offering understanding and compassion. Similarly, it also means that they can easily become overwhelmed.

It’s also important to note that many empaths aren’t limited to detecting emotions. They may also pick up physical sensations and can sense someone’s spiritual orientation. They may also be able to tune into a person’s motivation or immediately read their intentions.

In some cases, empaths are entirely aware that they are experiencing feelings that don’t belong to them. However, in other cases (and especially in early life), empaths may be genuinely confused by what they pick up. Consequently, they may find it hard to know what they really want. Self-reflective journalling and therapy can be extremely useful to an empath; these processes allow them to examine their thoughts, emotions, and desires without the usual level of interference.

With this broad picture in mind, we can now move on to look at the main traits that are commonly seen in empaths.

Are You An Empath? 14 Traits Of An Empath

Empaths can experience their gifts differently, especially depending on when (or whether) they realize that they are significantly different from the average person.

In addition, empathy (like all traits) comes by degrees, so some empaths will notice all fourteen major signs while others may only spot a handful. However, if you’re an empath, there’s a good chance that you’ve had most of these experiences at least once in your life.

Think of the following list as a kind of empath test; if you’re asking “Am I an empath or just sensitive?”, canvassing these traits may help you to clarify your self-conception.

1. Empaths are highly sensitive and emotional.

Empaths are very open, easy to trust, and very responsive to emotional experiences (whether their own or someone else’s).

This sensitivity means you can experience the highest highs, but it also curses you with the lowest lows, and with a propensity to be deeply hurt by fractured relationships. If you’re an empath, you may go through a wide range of emotions every day, both because of your own responses to life and because of what you pick up.

2. They are often introverts and need alone time.

While you likely love intensely and genuinely care for people, your propensity to take on their emotions means that alone time is essential. Indeed, most empaths recharge when they’re on their own, rather than deriving energy from social situations (like extrovertsdo).

So, if you have higher than average levels of empathy, there are probably many weekends when you’d rather curl up at home with a good book than accept an invitation to a party.

3. Unfortunately, empaths are easy targets for manipulators.

Your empathy means that people may sometimes take advantage of you. Consequently, they may manipulate you into a position where you meet their emotional needs and get very little out of the relationship yourself.

For example, you may have noticed that you often attract narcissists (who are at the opposite end of the empathy spectrum) and victims (who need to be “rescued” by compassionate individuals). Consequently, empaths need to be careful about who they let into their hearts.

4. They have great intuition and keen senses.

One of the most obvious empath traits is the ability to pick up on subtle cues way earlier than most people. So, you might notice a potential romance between two friends before anyone else does or you may pick up indications of danger very quickly. Plus, you probably have a talent for taking calculated risks.

This intuitive sharpness is one of the great benefits of empathy and gives you an edge in many areas of life.

5. They take on other people’s feelings and issues.

As noted above, being an empath makes you susceptible to muddling your emotions with those of others. For example, you might take on the bad moods of colleagues and end up fighting with your partner. Or, you may passively absorb the views of a group that do not typically represent your values.

Creating and maintaining boundaries between yourself and others is a vital part of living with enhanced empathy, allowing you to identify what’s really yours.

6. Empaths tend to be incredibly creative.

The heightened emotions and experiences of empaths gives them an enormous wealth of material to express in creative ways. If you’re an empath, it’s likely that you are frequently inspired because of what you feel.

Some empaths are traditional artists, musicians or writers, while others are actors, dancers, or physically expressive in other ways. In many cases, creative acts help empaths release pent-up emotion in a healthy, productive way.

origins-video7. People say they are great listeners.

Unsurprisingly, the friends and family of empaths often report that they are fantastic listeners. This is because being a truly good listener requires putting yourself in the other person’s shoes; no one is better at doing that than someone who intuitively picks up emotions.

Empaths are often wonderful at putting a loved one’s feelings into words, making them feel understood, respected and less alone. Consequently, empaths often gravitate towards jobs that involve listening (e.g. counseling and teaching).

8. They hate to say no.

Due to being able to feel other people’s disappointment, desperation and sadness, empaths really hate to have to say no. This means they often take on way too many commitments! Unfortunately, this is usually all so that they can meet the need of their friends, family members or co-workers. If you’re an empath, you’re also so used to doing emotional labor for other people that you may just automatically expand this to induce general favors, even if you’re already over-burdened.

9. Empaths are human lie detectors.

In general, you’ll benefit from the ability to pick up lies in other people. It can help you make early decisions about whether to trust someone with a secret, for example. It can also help you protect your loved ones from liars. The less pleasant side of being a human lie detector is that it allows you to see through someone when you’d rather stay in the dark. This can be painful, even though it’s helpful.

10. They often suffer from fatigue and anxiety.

There are many positive effects of kindness on health. However, if you’re an empath then the level of kindness you extend to others may be downright exhausting. You can be so busy trying to carry other people’s emotions, listening to their issues and helping them solve their problems that you become physically fatigued or emotionally strung out. As a result, empaths are susceptible to chronic fatigue syndrome and to mental health issues likes anxiety and depression.

11. They can be easily overwhelmed by their empathic powers.

Even once you understand your empathy quite well and have learned techniques to separate your emotions, it’s very easy to tip back over into being overwhelmed again.

For example, if someone you love is in distress, you might be utterly swamped by their sadness. Meanwhile, if you’re in a large crowd then the proximity of so many minds and emotions can feel too much to bear. These are some of the many reasons why empaths need time alone.

12. Empaths love to be surrounded by nature.

Everyday life tends to be hectic and noisy, so it’s no wonder that empaths thrive in nature. If you have a high level of empathy, being out in wide-open spaces can feel wonderfully quiet and replenishing. In fact, many empaths cite being by the ocean or going for walks in the country as necessary ingredients of their self-care routines. As well as offering peace and quiet, time in nature can give you a sense of release.

13. They are chronic daydreamers.

One of the less obvious empath signs is consistent daydreaming. This is often associated with the vivid imagination of the empath. Consequently, this allows you to contemplate an endless range of scenarios (especially scenarios that are highly emotionally evocative).

In addition, daydreaming can feel like a way of escaping everyday life. So, many empaths will turn to the power of their creative minds. This can help to distract them from the overwhelming emotions of others around them.

14. Empaths often neglect themselves.

Empaths can become so focused on the needs and feelings of others that they effectively begin to “tune out” their own needs. In extreme cases, this can lead to self-neglect, leading you to become physically or emotionally unwell. To live a full, happy life, someone with high levels of empathy needs to deliberately spend time noticing their own thoughts and feelings. A daily mindfulness or meditation practice can help with this, cultivating a habit of self-reflection.

6 Scientific Theories Behind Empathy

Now that you have a better sense of whether you qualify as an empath, you may be wondering what on earth accounts for this ability. Intuiting the feelings and thoughts of others can feel downright bizarre and unnerving sometimes. Meanwhile, if you don’t identify as an empath and find yourself becoming an empath skeptic, you are probably wondering whether there is really any credible evidence that such individuals actually exist.

As it turns out, there are at least six plausible scientific explanations for what may seem, on the first inspection, to be an implausible superpower. We’ll summarize the latest research below. Plus, we will try to explain the ramifications it could have for developing a better understanding of empathy in the future. While the jury is still out regarding why exactly some people develop an enhanced capacity for empathy, it’s highly likely that one or more of the following hypotheses will prove correct.

1. Sensory Processing Disorder

Sensory processing disorder is a condition that makes the affected individual’s brain struggle to work through the information absorbed from the world around them. It can make you oversensitive to everything from smells to sounds and light touches on the skin. This process can be perceived as painful. And when life gets too noisy or over-stimulating in some other way you may wobble on your feet, trip up easily, and find it difficult to judge distances. Some people even report dizziness, as well as increased anxiety.

Now, how does all of this relate to empathy? Some scientists have suggested that sensory sensitivity may also occur at the level of emotions in some people. This would make them much more aware of the feelings of others. On this view, enhanced empathy is the emotional equivalent of feeling pain at the gentlest touch on your arm.

As for what causes sensory processing disorder in the first instance, the evidence is mixed. Some studies indicate a genetic component (so empaths may have at least one highly empathetic parent), and others link sensory processing disorder to abnormal brain activity that occurs in response to noise or light.

2. Empaths Could Have Overactive Mirror Neurons

In the simplest terms, mirror neurons are brain cells that have a proven link to human compassion. It is because of these neurons that the majority of us are able to experience at least minimal empathy. For example, feeling sad when someone is hurting, or experiencing happiness in the face of another person’s joyful success.

Studies show that the mirror neurons activate during empathetic engagement between physicians and patients. Brain scans indicate that when we see someone experiencing an emotion, these mirror neurons fire in areas of the brain that correspond to those observed emotions. Scientists have found that mirror neurons also play a role in the behavior of other animals, especially primates.

The connection between mirror neurons and empaths is that there’s a strong possibility that more neurons may lead to more intense empathy. So, if you’re an empath, you may have a larger than average proliferation of these brain cells. Once again, there is likely to be a genetic component in play here.

However, research into other determining factors is ongoing. Meanwhile, people who have some form of antisocial personality disorder (e.g. sociopaths and psychopaths) may have fewer than average mirror neurons.

3. Electromagnetism

On an entirely different note, many of the above empath symptoms could be explained by electromagnetism. This particular theory derives from some fascinating work conducted by researchers at the HeartMath Institute, who have explored whether our electromagnetic fields are capable of influencing the magnetic fields of others.

In particular, the HeartMath Institute has discussed findings suggesting that our hearts and brains generate their own, unique electromagnetic fields. These fields are thought to be able to communicate certain content about the individual’s feelings, desires and beliefs, even those among us who are not natural born empaths.

Utilizing my heart energy was the key to finding my Intention Point and manifesting my dream life. Be sure to discover more about how the Intention Point can help you manifest the life you really want.
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These facts about electromagnetism mean that it is possible that empaths have a heightened sensitivity to the electromagnetic fields by the hearts and brains of people in their vicinity. Consequently, the empath could become so sensitive that this process is emotionally and physically draining. It remains an open question whether empaths can do anything to regulate this sensitivity.

Other promising areas of future research include whether the impact on the empath varies depending on facts about the field produced by the other individual. If so, we could conclude whether this indicates anything significant about the potential depth of relationship that might develop between the empath and the other person.

4. Hormone And Chemical Sensitivities

Parts of empath psychology could also relate to hormone levels, and to levels of neurotransmitters (i.e. chemical messengers in our brains).

One particularly promising contender is dopamine, a neurotransmitter that plays a key role in how we respond to pleasure (and how we learn to develop habits that promote pleasure in the longer term). Studies on dopamine levels in the general population indicate that introverted people are most sensitive to dopamine when compared to extroverted individuals. This means that introverted people tend to need lower levels of dopamine in order to experience happiness and pleasure. It’s possible that this tendency generalizes.

So, if you’re an introverted empath, you may just be more sensitive to small chemical changes in the body, including those that are induced by contact with other people. In addition, there may be other hormones and neurotransmitters in play when it comes to empathy.

Further research may reveal other links between empathy and biological sensitivity. This could, in turn, lead to research on how we might enhance empathy in those who lack it.

5. Emotions May Be Contagious

We are now beginning to understand just how contagious emotions can be. Emotion contagion is now a documented phenomenon; it helps to explain how and why we pick up the feelings of those around us. Even the average individual is impacted by emotional contagion. For example, babies cry when they can hear other infants becoming upset. Plus, if one person exhibits signs of anxiety then it can quickly begin to spread throughout a bigger group.

Positive emotions can be contagious too. For example, random acts of kindness statistics show that people become more compassionate when they receive compassion, and the benefits of acts of kindness can also extend to those who merely observe compassion.

To trace out the implications that this has for our scientific understanding of empaths, consider that empaths may be biologically or psychologically more likely to “catch” emotional contagions. However, the exact mechanism via which this might occur still remains mysterious. There is also a positive piece of learning here for empaths. Specifically, research on emotional contagion shows how empaths can surround themselves with upbeat, happy and encouraging people in order to deliberately catch good feelings from others.

6. Synesthesia

The final hypothesis worth considering is that empaths may experience a unique form of synesthesia. Synesthesia is a neurological trait that links two different senses that wouldn’t normally be associated with each other. For example, some individuals with synesthesia will taste particular flavors when they see certain colors. Others will associate numbers with a musical sound. In addition, some forms of synesthesia might include smelling scents when listening to songs. Or, linking particular colors to specific bodily sensations. Many people say this is a key part of their creativity; they simply don’t know what life is like for the rest of us!

However, in the case of empaths, some researchers have theorized that something called mirror-touch synesthesia is occurring. This type of condition would allow the empath to literally feel what other people are feeling. This is described as though these emotions are originating in their own bodies and not outside them. On this view, excessive empathy is a medically benign neurological abnormality that comes with benefits and challenges, just like all forms of synesthesia.

To investigate this hypothesis further, scientists may want to test whether empaths tend to have other, overlapping forms of regular sense synesthesia as well.

In Conclusion…

While many wonderful and perplexing questions remain, we have seen how the experiences of empaths may be explained from a scientific perspective. We’ve also looked at how we can distinguish enhanced empathy from mere sensitivity. Try to consider some of the ways in which you might get the best out of being an empath. However, make sure you continue to protect yourself from some of the associated dangers.

What are your experiences of empathy, both in yourself and others? Do you wish you were more or less empathetic, and why?

Please comment to let us know if you are an empath! Tell us whether the description in the article rings true to you.

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You’ll likely have heard a lot about the alleged importance of positivity, but if you’ve downplayed it until now then the most recent scientific studies strongly suggest you should reconsider. Moreso than ever before, we’re aware of the complex links between mental and physical health. For example, what you eat can impact your mood. Plus, how you think can increase or reduce your risk of developing certain chronic diseases. Some of the most exciting new research on this interplay between the body and the mind focuses specifically on the importance of positive thinking and, especially, on the power of forgiveness.

In what follows, we’ll explore why and how forgiveness heals, and we’ll offer some advice to help shift you towards a more optimistic and compassionate state of mind. While we all have low moods and experience difficulties, if you can make positivity your default setting then you’ll have a good chance of improving (and maybe even extending) your life.

Forgive And Forget? How Forgiveness Can Improve Your Health

Scientists caution that the body suffers when you’re in a consistently negative state and that this might promote the development of certain diseases. Meanwhile, studies on people who practice forgiveness and positive thinking techniques indicate an overall reduction in the risk of illness. In this context, “forgiveness” refers to deciding that you are willing to let go of feelings of resentment and anger towards another person, abandoning the urge for revenge and instead, trying to approach life with a clean slate.

To be clear, this doesn’t mean condoning bad behavior or claiming that poor treatment of you was okay. Rather, it means empathizing with those who have wronged you, looking for positive lessons you have learned, and authentically expressing your feelings so that you can process them.

7 Reasons To Trust The Power Of Forgiveness

The benefits of positive thinking are numerous! When it comes to the power of forgiveness, we will look at seven of the most significant. As we do so, we’ll consider common obstacles you might face and offer some simple tips for overcoming those challenges.

1. You Turn Off Your Fight-Or-Flight Mode

If you’re angry all the time, your body is perceiving danger and you’re constantly in fight-or-flight mode. This puts an enormous strain on your cardiovascular system. In turn, this can make your heart beat faster; flooding your system with stress hormones. Your muscles are tense, and you’re more likely to sweat excessively.

In contrast, moving towards forgiveness reduces stress and anger, allowing your body to retreat to a calmer, more productive mode. One of the best ways of letting go of anger is to channel it into a healthy physical activity like running, boxing or dancing. Writing out your angry thoughts can be a way of excising negativity.

2. It Can Decrease Your Blood Pressure

As implied above, many researchers have drawn particular attention to cardiovascular benefits when looking at how forgiveness affects your health. With respect to blood pressure, a 2011 study found that those who found a way to forgive cheating partners ultimately exhibited a reduction in both systolic and diastolic blood pressure readings.

Meanwhile, work published in the Journal of Behavioral Medicine indicated that stress and blood pressure levels dropped in response to forgiveness.

So, when you hold onto resentment, you’re giving the other person the power to hurt your body. Through forgiveness, you empower yourself to create a healthier, happier body.

3. Better Sleep

One of the best positive thinking tips is to ensure that you get more sleep and have better “sleep hygiene” (e.g. removing electronic devices from the bedroom). However, the reverse is also true; in other words, getting into a more positive mindset also makes it easier for you to get good, restful sleep.

For example, psychologists have seen how forgiveness brings a reduction in fatigue and increases the number of study participants who are able to sleep through the night. This may be partly because being angry and resentful makes you feel like you have unfinished business, and ruminating on this keeps your mind overly alert.

4. A Reduction In Stress, Anger, And Hostility

Negative thinking and holding onto grudges doesn’t just mean feeling angry towards someone who wronged you; it can make you more hostile and irritable, interfering with relationships in general.

In contrast, all of the recent studies on the impact of forgiveness clearly point to how it makes you more affable, and happier in friendships. The associated reduction in stress could also extend your life expectancy. This is because consistently high levels of chronic stress are strongly tied to earlier death and severe symptoms of illness.

So, if you need more motivation to let go of the past, try to remember just how much it could be inhibiting your present.

5. Improves Your Self-Control

Few positive thinking articles talk about this consequence, but actively forgiving those who have wronged you makes you better at thinking through your actions before you act.

Instead of immediately expressing anger in a cruel way, you’re able to take a deep breath and consider whether it’s helpful for you to lash out. This increased self-control might have further impacts on your overall physical health, as it arguably makes you less likely to choose risky courses of action that could put you in danger. When you’re no longer on the knife’s edge of rage and have moved to a place of acceptance, self-preservation kicks in.

loa-quiz6. A Lower Risk in Alcohol Abuse

Among the most significant effects of positive thinking is a proven reduction in alcohol abuse and substance abuse more generally.

So, one of the most important reasons to take the leap of empathy and maturity required for forgiveness is that you’ll be far less likely to reach for unhealthy coping mechanisms to match your emotions. After all, many people turn to alcohol because it numbs pain. Forgiveness reduces the amount of pain you’d want to escape.

In addition, the process of forgiveness is all about positive, honest reflection, so it also makes you better at regulating your emotions without outside help.

7. Forgiveness Can Lead To Healthier, More Stable Relationships

Finally, when you work to achieve forgiveness in a particular context, we learn how to do it more easily in the future. In other words, we view forgiveness as the eventual consequence of all conflict, instead of gearing up to “win” a fight. We start to see forgiveness as a regularly practiced, positive habit that encourages us to feel peaceful and calm. The consequence of this will often be better relationships in which there’s honest, open and loving communication.

Meanwhile, the body responds with a slower heart rate, a drop in stress hormones, and a surge in energy that we can use to accomplish other things in our lives.

loa-quiz

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When you read about the Law of Attraction, the focus will typically be on how you can use the Law to your advantage, attracting more of what you want into your life. However, the Law of Attraction concerns everything in the universe, both positive and negative. Consequently, this means that all of your heartbreaks, past traumas and difficulties can be understood through the lens of manifestation. In addition, once you view your life’s journey in this way, it’s easier to see how you can ensure a happier future for yourself.

So, if you’re always wondering “Why do bad things happen to me?”, this guide can help you get a firmer grip on the causes of negativity in your life. We’ll also explore how to move forward, whilst reducing the impact of past negativity. Throughout, the focus will be on learning to make more sense of what you’ve been through, and on looking to a productive future.

Are We Truly To Blame When Bad Things Happen?

It can be painful to think about why bad things happen. Often, we are inclined to blame ourselves or to assume that our traumas show we lack value. However, the reality of the situation is more complex than you may have supposed.

In particular, it’s important to remember that recent psychological studies show negativity is contagious. It seeps into our thoughts and feelings, influencing our opinions and shaping our beliefs. So, even if you have set good intentions and have attempted to use the Law of Attraction to manifest them, contagious negativity from around you (or even from a previous life) can get in the way.

Why Do Bad Things Happen? 6 Theories

Here are six leading theories that could explain how the Law of Attraction relates to the bad things you’ve experienced in life so far. With this understanding in place, you can then move on to think about how you can protect yourself from bad things in the future.

1. You Manifested It Via Fear Or Negativity

It’s important not to disregard this fact as it is possible to accidentally cause bad things to happen in your life because of fear or negativity. In other words, if you set an intention but you don’t tackle the associated limiting beliefs in your subconscious, you can send out mixed signals. These not only prevent you from manifesting what you want but actually lead you to manifest things you don’t want to have in your life at all. If you think back, you may be able to see that you held unrecognized or suppressed fears that existed at the same time as some of your toughest experiences.

The way to get around this common cause of bad things is to face up to mixed feelings you have about your manifestation goals. Instead of trying to pretend they don’t exist, take a solid look at them and work out how to counteract them with productive, positive beliefs.

2. Someone Else Manifested It

When reflecting on the question “Why do bad things happen?” it’s also well worth looking beyond yourself. As mentioned above, negativity is deeply contagious. Therefore, you’ll often experience it when someone else has manifested it. This is especially true if they are someone you love or spend a lot of time around.

Once again, think about the specific bad things you’ve struggled through, and consider who was in your vicinity. Could that have manifested the negativity that you experienced?

As well as thinking about negative individuals, negative overall environments can be a major factor. You can absorb bad energy in a workplace, or even in a building where lots of people are unhappy. This is an important reminder to be conscious of who you let into your life, how much time you spend around negative people, and what boundaries you set to protect yourself.

On the flipside, being around positive people can actively help you to manifest good things.

3. It Was Manifested Pre-Birth

Beyond what you do and where you spend your time, things even further outside of your control can have an influence on what you manifest and the traumas you endure. This can happen in one of two ways. Firstly, you may have manifested something in a past life, which only comes to full fruition in your present life.

Secondly, a family member can influence your manifestation journey before birth. While there is nothing you can do about this, of course, it can help to make sense of what has happened to you if you can’t trace your negative experiences to something you can remember in your present life.

The possibility of pre-birth manifestation is also a reminder of how you can impact on the lives of others before they are born. For example, manifesting positivity and abundance for future children is possible. In addition, efforts to manifest may go beyond your present life, helping you in future lives.

4. Deflection

If you’ve ever doubted the validity of the Law of Attraction because of the fact bad things happen, or you’ve ever used the concept to make yourself feel worse, it’s highly probable that you’re engaging in a process of deflection.

In this context, what deflection means is avoiding growth, staying stuck and remaining ignorant of your greatest wants and needs. So, ask yourself if there are particular emotions or particular facts about yourself that you may be trying to avoid; consider how this avoidance may be related to negative experiences of manifestation.

However, be clear about the fact that it’s natural to want to deflect or avoid things sometimes. Self-knowledge can be scary, especially when it may be contrary to what we’ve previously believed about ourselves or our life’s purpose. So, don’t be hard on yourself for deflecting, but remind yourself of the cost of it. Conversely, reflect on the benefits associated with growth.

5. The Universe Has Something Planned For You (Timing Is Everything)

When you experience heartbreak and trauma, it can often feel like there’s no possible way that these experiences will lead to a better future.

(Reminder: if you want to clear negativity from your mind and promote positive habits, sign up for your free guide ebook, just click here now.)

However, sometimes you’re unable to manifest something positive right now because the universe needs you to manifest something even better at a later date. In other words, negativity can sometimes come as a necessary step on the road to your most important destination. As painful as some life events can be, they will often turn out to be part of the universe’s plan for your unique gifts.

In addition, note that just because you weren’t able to successfully manifest something (e.g. love or abundance) at some point, this doesn’t mean you will never be able to do so. Timing is everything! And perseverance can be key.

So, be alert to signs and intuitions suggesting you may have reached the right moment to try again. In retrospect, you may see that without your struggle, your ultimate joy would have been lessened.

6. It Is Outside Our Control

Finally, think of huge and terrible events, such as wars and genocides. The majority of contemporary Law of Attraction practitioners would not want to say that victims of such events caused their own suffering, or were in complete control of their lives. Rather, they might note that there are some things in life over which we can in principle have no control, and simply cannot prevent in spite of our best efforts. Manifestation is, after all, a complex process. The balance of all of our individual intentions can interact in ways that produce unpredictable outcomes.

There are two important things to take away from the message that we likely don’t have total control. First of all, that sometimes there is nothing you could have done to prevent a traumatic event. Secondly, that you will instead benefit from focusing on your internal reaction to that trauma. That is something over which you have full control.

clearingnegativity

What Now? How To Move Forward, Not Back

Armed with a more solid sense of how negativity acts as a contagion and how the Law of Attraction may play a range of roles in trauma, let’s move on to think about what you should do next. As discussed above, there are ways to reduce the chances of accidentally manifesting negativity. However, it’s more sensible to devote the bulk of your energy to actively manifesting positivity.

Here are three powerful things you can do to move forward after a bad experience, along with examples that may relate to your own situation.

Challenge Yourself

There are multiple senses in which it is important to challenge yourself. Firstly, when we stay in our comfort zones, we stagnate rather than moving forward. If you’ve been through a difficult period in your life, one of the best things you can do is deliberately step out of that comfort zone. Make a list of things that will help you manifest your greatest goals. Then, look to see which ones you’ve been avoiding. Focus on those, and really engage with them. Tell yourself that no matter what happens, you will learn from the challenge.

Secondly, challenge the way you think. When you notice yourself thinking negatively, look beneath the belief to the assumptions and to the belief’s origins. When did you learn this, and why? Do you really endorse it? What can you say to yourself to help you replace the limiting, negative belief with something more empowering and positive?

Forgive Yourself

When you ask “Why do bad things keep happening to me?”, psychology experts often point out that you’re most likely to move beyond negativity if you truly believe you deserve good things. If you’re stuck in the mentality of blaming yourself for every difficulty you’ve faced, you’ll only generate more heartache and attract more negative people into your life. Instead, forgive yourself for past mistakes, and take a non-judgemental attitude to them. By all means, identify such mistakes and what you would do differently. However, disconnect this from evaluations of your value as a person.

If you struggle to forgive yourself, consider whether you’d take the same attitude towards someone you love. If you’re blaming and resenting yourself when you would be gentler and more understanding with another person, then you’re being much too hard on yourself. We are all fallible, and mistakes are a key part of our development.

Love Yourself

Finally, to move forward after heartbreak and trauma will require learning how to love yourself in a deep, sincere way. This is partly related to the above point of forgiving your fallibility. However, it’s also about truly celebrating your abilities and successes. What do you enjoy about yourself? What things of value do you contribute to the world? How would your favorite people describe you? All of these questions encourage you to focus on the reasons why you are deserving of love.

Loving-kindness meditations can be of use in developing self-love. These practices aim to help you develop compassion for the self by repeating your wishes. You can design your own affirmations to repeat in a meditative state. An example to start with is “May I be happy, healthy, strong and at peace”. Done on a daily basis, loving, kind messages can slowly help you to heal after trauma.

What do you think? Is negativity contagious or do bad things ‘just’ happen? Let us know your opinion.

Comment below now.

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You’ve undoubtedly heard of the concept of soul mates, and have perhaps even daydreamed about finding yours. Nevertheless, you may also have dismissed the concept and think it is an implausible fantasy and settled for a relationship that merely feels comfortable. The reality is that not only do soul mates exist, but it’s possible to form even deeper connections. Experts call these matches twin flames. While twin flame relationships still face hardships and do not always last forever, they represent an important chance for happiness and growth.

So, what exactly is a twin flame? How do you know if you have encountered your mirror soul? In this guide, we’ll explain the nature of a twin flame, and outline the most common signs that you have this type of bond with someone in your life. Next, we’ll explore the seven distinct twin flame stages that you’re likely to experience in any twin flame relationship. Plus, consider what these stages will mean for you and your match.

What Is A Twin Flame?

Sometimes discussed in terms of a “mirror soul” or “soul connection”, a twin flame is the other half of your soul. It is theorized that a soul can split into two after ascending to a high frequency. Thereafter, the soul lands in two different bodies.

If you compare a twin flame vs. soulmate, it’s important to note that a soul mate is someone who is made from the same kind of energy as you, but who has never existed in fusion with you. So, although soul mate connections are highly significant, an encounter with a twin flame is on another level entirely. Usually, this will lead to romance. However, it can also manifest in the form of an intense friendship.

“We think we meet someone with our eyes. But we actually meet them with our soul” ― Mimi Novic

If you have a twin flame, you are fated to meet this person at some point in your life journey. The two of you will be pulled together like magnets! You will know when you’ve connected with this person because you’ll immediately experience a sense of recognition. Many people describe an uncanny sense of having known their twin flame all their lives. When you encounter the person who carries the other half of your energy, it can create a profound and life-altering sense of wholeness.

Your relationship will naturally be extremely intense because twin flames are mirrors of one another. This person will not only provide a sense of wholeness; they will also elevate your self-knowledge, including knowledge of your flaws. Consequently, there’s a potential for conflict as well as happiness. Rest assured that it is possible to have a happy, healthy relationship with your twin flame. However, this is only possible if you can learn to love yourself, as your twin flame is part of you. This love must be honest and unconditional! Otherwise, a part of you will always be driven to reject your twin flame.

 

Most Common Twin Flame Symptoms

While the above summary of a twin flame will help you get a general sense of what to look out for, there are also more specific indicators that you’ve encountered your other half.

The most common twin flame signs are as follows:

  • Intuitively knowing what the other person is doing, feeling, or thinking about. Plus, you find that they can detect the same things about you.
  • Sharing many of the same interests, values, hobbies, and preferences. For example, your twin flame probably has a lot of books in your favorite genre. Similarly, you likely gravitate towards the same food as well.
  • Often having the same thoughts or emotions at the same time, even if you’re in different places. When you’re together in person, this may result in you saying the same thing at almost the exact same moment.
  • Feeling a strong physical pull to touch and be close, whether in a romantic or platonic setting.
  • Having the same dreams at night, and frequently appearing in each other’s dreams. Sometimes your dreams will only overlap in theme, but the core message and feeling will be similar.
  • Feeling like you can easily communicate without speaking out loud. A simple glance will often be enough to tell you what your twin flame thinks about what’s going on around you.
  • Understanding complex or hidden parts of each other. This can be uncomfortable and confronting, but it can also be deeply liberating and validating.
  • Sharing some of the same vulnerabilities and weaknesses. You may see some of your old faults in your twin flame, or have some of your present difficulties highlighted by the way this person behaves.
  • Feeling like it’s safe and natural to be your authentic self around this person. For example, even if you’re normally shy, a twin flame will quickly make you feel comfortable enough to just be you.

7 Twin Flames Stages

Meeting a twin flame is a special, life-altering moment! However, it’s only the beginning of what is in store for both of you. Encountering one another kick-starts a dynamic new part of your life; one that will facilitate growth, inspire change and challenge you to fully accept yourself. Think of encountering your twin flame as the first step on a journey.

We’ll explore each of the twin flame stages in turn, and look at the connection between twin flame symptoms and each of these crucial stages. Some are primarily associated with wonderful experiences while others can be emotionally arduous, but all of them are necessary parts of encountering the other half of yourself. There are seven major twin flame steps to the process. Nonetheless, be aware that you may go through them at a slow or faster rate than other people will.

Stage 1. The Search

The search stage involves a strong sense of yearning and an acute awareness that something is lacking in your life. Even if you’ve never really thought about soul mates and twin flames before, this is the stage at which you begin to believe that there really is a perfect match out there for you. In all likelihood, you’ll doubt this feeling at first; you may feel unsure about what you should do with it, but at the deepest level, you will find it impossible to shake the conviction that you will meet “the one”.

The search stage is also partly about preparing your life for the incoming arrival of your twin flame, even though you may not know why you are doing this. For example, you may start a journal, engage in therapy, or work to find closure after past relationships. On an unconscious level, you know that all of these things are necessary if you are to welcome your twin flame.

Stage 2. The Awakening

As noted above in the discussion of soulmate signs, you tend to just know when you’ve encountered your twin flame. This second, awakening stage is where you physically meet, and the awareness of your compatibility hits you head on. This will often be a chance encounter that is full of coincidences and little signs that your meeting was destined to take place.

Sometimes, you won’t be together for very long, but even brief contact is enough to make you aware that something special is happening. It’s also worth noting that the awakening can take place in a dream, meaning that you “meet” your twin flame in the dreamscape before you ever cross paths in real life. Regardless of how you meet, you will be shaken by the intensity of the bond you feel. You may feel intoxicated by it, and find that all of your waking moments are occupied by thoughts of this person.

Stage 3. The Test

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The test stage of a twin flame experience is defined by trying to understand your relationship with this other person. It is all about establishing boundaries, testing your limitations, and moving past the purely blissful experience of initially falling in love.

This stage will only occur once you’ve had enough time to enjoy a “honeymoon” phase. Plus, this stage is crucial if you are going to have a more meaningful, long-term relationship. For example, it is at this point that you will negotiate what your future will look like, and will begin to notice what may constitute obstacles to that future.

Although you are destined to know and love each other, you will still engage in conflicts (in the same way that before you met your twin flame, you engaged in conflict with other parts of yourself). Whether and how you resolve these conflicts, will define whether you’ll be able to stay together.

Stage 4. The Crisis

While twin flame love can be euphoric, it also inevitably involves a crisis stage. While this is often unpleasant, the good news is that it can also catalyze a deeper, more stable bond in the longer term. This stage involves significant anxiety and worries about your bond with your twin flame, and the crisis can be just about anything. It may be related to grief, betrayal, struggles with self-love or any number of other things that put pressure on your connection with your twin flame.

In spite of the supernatural compatibility of twin flames, this is often a point at which the two people decide to separate (a process that is extra painful given that it involves giving up a part of yourself). However, if you can get through the next few stages, you will emerge stronger than ever before.

Stage 5. The Running Or Chasing Stage

No matter what form the crisis stage takes, it is always followed by a running or chasing stage. You may be in either role, and you and your twin flame may switch back and forward between the two roles. This stage revolves around one twin flame distancing themselves, often out of fear of confronting the level of intimacy that the two of you are capable of experiencing. The twin in this role will be in pain and will feel very defensive and resistant. Meanwhile, the other twin flame will give chase, believing that the bond is worth fighting for and working on.

This stage can only end up when the running twin stops trying to get away, and the chasing twin stops trying to push. Often, the end of this stage is characterized by both twin flames realizing that there are forces at work beyond their control.

Stage 6. The Surrender

In the surrender stage, both of you will start to give up on a previous need to control your relationship. In this context, surrendering isn’t about giving up on your connection, but rather about accepting that neither of you can escape from destiny. This can be a positive realization that releases you both from past anxieties and allows you to better live in the moment, trusting that the universe will lead you to where you need to go.

Do note that it’s only possible to progress through the surrender stage if both of you work on the issues that led to the crisis and the running/chasing stages. For many people, the core issue here relates to the fact that twin flames are mirrors. So, often, the things you will need to work through are the negative feelings you have about yourself, which are reflected back to you in the eyes of your twin.

Stage 7. The Reunion and Joining

When you and your twin flame move on to the reunion stage, you’ll have a sense of relief at the fact that balance is being restored.

In going through the previous, challenging stages, you’ll have learned a lot about yourselves and about the potential attached to the unique kind of love you have found.

For some twin flames, this reunion will be physical in nature. For example, the two of you may finally come back to the same place, agreeing to share a home, or finally physically consummating your bond.

Irrespective of the particular form the reunion takes, it carries with it a sense of peace, acceptance and reciprocal understanding.

If you can weather the more tumultuous parts of your journey, twin flame energy inevitably leads both parties to this joining stage. After the reunion, the hard work is over; all you need to do now is live, enjoying the sense of completeness that can only be found in each other’s companionship.

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If you’ve ever been called an overthinker or a worrier, you know that most people tend to think of it as a negative character trait. Overthinking can make it tough to make choices or to relax. Plus, it can complicate your perspective on just about everything in life.

Sometimes,overthinking can also cause or worsen anxiety. In addition, it can lead you to have pretty high demands in relationships, as you’ll need someone who can understand your detail-oriented personality. However, overthinking is certainly not all bad. In fact, according to the latest research, it might just mean you’re a creative genius!

We’ll explore the specific studies that led to this conclusion, and explain how you can apply this research to your own experiences. Then, we’ll look at particular connections between overthinking and creative talent, offering some advice for how you can channel this part of you into productive, positive output going forward.

The Latest Research On Overthinking…

What exactly is a creative genius? Firstly, it’s important to note that creativity isn’t always directly linked to art. By definition, creative genius can be tied to all kinds of skill sets. In fact, creativity is linked to anything that requires imagination and outside-the-box thinking.

While one creative genius might be a wonderful interior decorator, another might be a composer, a writer, or a visionary leader of a business. Now, why is this highly desirable trait related to overthinking?

If you think about some of the most admirable creative people, you might start to see why this link exists. Many of the people you view as role models are likely to also have lived complex lives and experienced a degree of neuroticism. In contrast, those you admire for their positive, sunny dispositions are probably not the most creative people you’ve ever encountered. But what is the science behind this anecdotal evidence?

“Neurobiology Of Personality”

A research team at King’s College London first made the exciting connection between creativity and a tendency towards overthinking. Lead by expert neurobiologist Dr. Adam Perkins, they started out by noting that people who are highly attuned to potential threats have extra activity in a certain part of their brains: the medial prefrontal cortex.

Part of their amygdala (the part of the brain that processes emotions) is also highly reactive. And if this is true of you, this means you also have a tendency to be struck by strong negative feelings even when you’re not in danger.

However, the researchers explored evidence that this hyper-awareness of potential threats is undeniably tied to an active, powerful imagination; a powerful imagination isn’t only useful for threat-detection. It’s also vital for making all forms of art. This means that the more of an overthinker you tend to be, the more imagination you have at your disposal. Plus, this talent is tied to high creative potential.

6 Reasons Why Worriers Are Usually Creative Geniuses

Having summarized the science behind the link between creative genius and overthinking, we can now look at some of the concrete ways in which this connection manifests. The following six explanations will boost your understanding of the psychological aspect of the connection. It should also help you see applications in your own life.

As you consider these six reasons on why worriers are often also creative geniuses; think about how you can take advantage of each of these aspects of overthinking, in order to maximize your output while minimizing your distress. Overthinking can become something that works for you, rather than primarily being a hindrance.

1. You Imagine Scenarios Deeply And Frequently

The overthinker personality is often characterized as involving a tendency to catastrophize; to think of the very worst that could happen, and fret about it coming to pass.

However, this ability to imagine highly detailed scenarios extends far beyond the negative. It prompts you to construct vivid daydreams; allows you to create whole imaginary worlds or characters; encourages you to consider ways to bend society’s rules. This creative imagination can give you the potential to develop a deeper sense of spirituality as well.

So, when you think about it, it makes perfect sense that the very talents you use for overthinking are equally applicable to creative output.

2. Fear And Worry Is A ‘Great’ Motivator

If you think about some of the most important inventions in history, it’s easy to see that they often arose directly from a worry of some sort. Think of the life-saving drugs we take for granted; the technology that protects us; our methods of avoiding starvation by way of industrialized food practices.

So, as well as endowing you with natural talents that enhance creativity, being an overthinker also pushes you to have the motivation to act. Where others might just briefly entertain a concern before shrugging it off, your default position is to take action and protect yourself from threats.

3. Overthinking Involves A Lot Of Problem Solving

When we think of creativity, we often think of painters and writers. However, one way to test creativity is to look at a person’s problem-solving. Overthinkers have this skill in abundance.

While you may sometimes imagine problems that aren’t really there, your constant attention to detail means you’re also the first person that friends and family look to when they have a tricky issue to solve. Your overthinking skills are easily applied to real-life dilemmas; you’ll often see creative solutions that others simply overlook. This is why being prone to overthinking can make you, not only a first-rate creator but also an excellent leader.

4. You Are Driven To Create And Change

Yes, worrying can be highly stressful and unpleasant; it can cause anxiety and stress, leading to negative thought patterns.

However, being an overthinker also means that you face up to the reality of what you don’t like so much about your life. You’ll, therefore, be more likely than the average person to create a better future for yourself.

You will look past what you are told is normal, or good enough. Then, you can apply that wonderful imagination of yours to the question of what might truly make you feel satisfied.

While happiness is not a guaranteed result, your drive to live more authentically will likely lead to you spending more time growing and less time conforming.

5. You Probably Experience Deep Levels Of Empathy

There is no standard “creative genius test”, but psychologists strongly suspect a correlation between high levels of creativity and a deep capacity for empathy. And if you’re an overthinker, the aforementioned ability to imagine a wide range of scenarios also makes you unusually good at perspective-taking; putting yourself in another person’s shoes.

When you can truly understand someone else’s emotions, you have a unique opportunity to make them feel understood and help them to work through their struggles.

As a bonus, if you’re a writer, your overthinking tendencies will help you empathize with imaginary characters and make them seem more real to your reader.

6. You Think About Every Possibility

Finally, because of that increased activity in your medial prefrontal cortex, you’re able to see a greater spread of possible outcomes than the average person. This is a deeply creative process in itself and involves tracing out complex chains of cause and effect.

Meanwhile, it will make you more successful in all your creative endeavors; you’ll have the chance to compare numerous possible ways of pursuing your goal. Consequently, you can find the very best path to follow. In contrast, people who think simply and superficially can’t be nearly as creative in this way; they’re used to thinking about only one or two possible outcomes.

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Many people are driven by a desire to manifest love; to build a life and a home with someone who can offer support, understanding, and affection. However, there are dozens of things that can hold you back, and some of these factors may surprise you. Intelligence might seem like a virtue and a selling point, but it regularly stands in the way of manifesting love. But why is this the case, and what can you do to increase your chances of finding romance?

If you know you’re smart but you’re always struggling to understand why dating is so hard, this guide will help you figure out how you can find love. First, we’ll explore the general link between high IQ and dating problems. Then we’ll turn to the five most significant reasons why this link exists. Throughout, we’ll note how these problems may be affecting you, and we’ll offer suggestions for positive change.

High IQ? Dating Problems? Why Dating Is So Hard…

If you have a high IQ, dating problems are more or less par for the course. While it’s not the case that only unintelligent people find love, there is ample evidence that being of above average intelligence creates more problems than solutions. This is partly due to the way that smarter people tend to think, and partly due to the personality traits that are typically correlated with high intelligence.

For example, you might notice that you’re hardly ever attracted to anyone for very long. Or, maybe your desire to manifest love has to compete with other, equally significant desires. You may also worry that people seem to be driven away by your intellect, rather than attracted to it.

The good news is that a high IQ doesn’t have to ruin your dating life. In fact, when used in the right way, it can deepen your connection with people you love and provide you with a more meaningful relationship over time. The trick is to identify how your intelligence often trips you up in the world of romance.

The following five reasons are most likely responsible for many of your struggles. Let’s consider how they develop and how you can overcome them.


1. Intelligent People Can Be Very Analytical And Logical

Firstly, your intelligence sharpens all areas of your mind. Any time you make a decision, you likely do so on the basis of relevant memories, risk assessments, and predictions about the future.

These abilities will ensure you thrive in the most professional settings, but they can make you view people in a highly negative light and can encourage you to make assumptions based on highly unique past relationships. In particular, you might rule out romantic prospects at a very fast rate, without really taking the time to get to know someone. You may almost have the sense that you’re looking for a reason to reject everyone, rather than reasons to keep seeing them.

Try to remember that what ended your last relationship needn’t end this one. Try to give everyone a clean slate when it comes to dating.

In addition, remember that you can’t “reason” your way in and out of love. Deliberately pay more attention to your emotions, giving them as much respect as your thoughts. When it comes to partner choice, your intuitions are often more reliable than your logical skills. Much of the time, your subconscious is picking up things that pull you towards a person, so don’t ignore that feeling when it arises.

2. They Tend To Be Overly Guarded

Your aforementioned tendency to recall past relationships can also make you more likely to go into self-preservation mode. The smarter you are, the more aware you are of everything that can go wrong, and you may find that you protect yourself to your own detriment. Yes, you may avoid pain, but you’ll also avoid joy.

Further, this detached, guarded way of being can give other people the mistaken impression that you’re cold, detached and unfeeling. This can reduce the frequency with which you’re approached by potential romantic partners. It can also give you the sense that you’re unattractive (which creates a negative feedback loop).

If you want to manifest love, you have to find a way to accept that you can’t control every aspect of the experience. One thing that can help is a commitment to find learning in whatever happens.

The thought is that you’ll become less afraid of potential heartache if you know that every relationship that doesn’t work out can teach you something valuable that will ensure you do find the right relationship at a later stage. If you reflect on other aspects of your life, you’ll see the roadblocks are often the very thing that ends up directing you to the life you’re meant to have.

3. They Are Independent

Independence is one of the hallmark characteristics of someone with a high IQ. In some ways, this is a very helpful trait to have. Many people seek relationships because they can’t cope with feeling alone, or because they don’t feel complete by themselves.

If you’re naturally independent, then you’re more likely to get into a romantic relationship for the right reasons. On the other hand, if you’re used to only taking your own preferences and desires into account, you can struggle to make room for another person in your life. You might not be very good at compromising, or you might easily feel stifled.

One useful strategy is to build your need for independence into a relationship. Schedule time for your own hobbies and for quiet reflection, and explain this need to your potential partners. If they can’t cope with it, they’re not the right person for you.

Meanwhile, when it comes to learning how to compromise, make this explicit. Most people will understand if you say “I’ve lived alone for a long time, so I’m still figuring out how to share my time and space with someone”. This indicates that you do want to be sensitive and fair, and allows you to take ownership of your current limitations.

4. Ambition Is a Priority

If you have a high IQ, relationship problems often derive from the priority you accord the partnership. In particular, it may naturally drift to the bottom of the pile, beneath your career and other ambitions.

It’s common for smart people to be dreamers, and to have lofty goals that get the bulk of their energy. If falling in love just isn’t one of your highest priorities right now, that’s fine.

But if you believe that it is a priority, you need to figure out ways to balance relationship maintenance with all the other things that matter to you.

Try using your naturally analytical mind to make a plan for how to spend your week. Using an online calendar, notebook or organizer, make sure that you’re budgeting enough time for dating (if you’re single), or spending time with a partner (if you’re in a relationship).

Over time, this should become more natural, and you should find you naturally start to prioritize romance to a greater degree. If you need a little help with this, be sure to get your copy of our Love Tool Kit.

If it doesn’t feel right to do so or you become unhappy, then maybe this is a sign that your goal should be something other than manifesting love right now.

5. They Can Be Intimidating To Others

Finally, it’s worth considering how others see you. Dating a highly intelligent man or women can be extremely stimulating, but your high IQ can also make others nervous to approach you. They may worry that you’ll reject them, assume that they can’t go toe to toe with you in a battle of wits, or worry that you’ll make them feel small.

Of course, you know that you also have weaknesses and soft spots; but at first look, all people may see is your enormous brain! This problem can kick in before someone even talks to you. Or it might put them off after a single date makes them feel anxious and silly.

Of course, you should never have to dumb yourself down in order to massage other people’s egos or make them feel safe to approach you. However, consider letting more of your flaws show when you’re interested in dating someone.

For example, openly discuss the things that you struggle with, and compliment the other person on the things you admire about them. Both of these strategies subtextually communicate that you are not superhuman and that it is still fully possible for you to learn from other people.

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Although not explicitly mentioned by name, ideas similar to the Law of Attraction appear in early Hindu, Christian, and Buddhist writings. Leading thinkers have long believed that it is possible for our thoughts to shape our reality. These spiritual authors and teachers suggested that what we offer to the world around us inevitably shape what we get in return. However, the core teachings associated with the modern Law of Attraction practices didn’t emerge until the early 19th century. This was when the New Thought Movement began.

In this guide, we’ll explore the biographies and theories of the major members of the New Thought Movement, charting the history of the Law of Attraction from its earliest origins right up until the present day. We’ll take a closer look at the specific contributions of each New Thought author, with an emphasis on their most enduring contributions and the key messages that you should take from their writings.

Phineas Quimby (1802 – 1866)

“The trouble is in the mind, for the body is only the house for the mind to dwell in … If your mind has been deceived by some invisible enemy into a belief, you have put it into the form of a disease, with or without your knowledge. By my theory or truth, I come in contact with your enemy and restore you to health and happiness.” – Phineas Parkhurst Quimby

Phineas Parkhurst Quimby was an American inventor who is widely viewed as the founding member of the New Thought movement. He was born in the early 19th century and was one of seven children. Although he grew up with little money or education, his experience of severe health problems in childhood later inspired him to work on developing cures for common medical ailments. When he realized that excitement could dull pain, he began to suspect that the mind affects the body in significant ways.

Phineas Quimby quotes indicate he was convinced that mental-aided healing could have broader applications. Therefore, in 1859 he opened an office in order to further pursue these treatments (before ultimately passing away in 1866).

Some people view him as the first person to begin work on psychosomatic illnesses. These are now a widely recognized (and treatable) phenomenon.

The most famous Phineas Quimby books are compilations of his writings, which set out his views on disease and recovery. For those studying the Law of Attraction, Phineas Quimby’s work helps to emphasize that you have the ability to shape your own experiences. He also discusses the negative impact of false beliefs (particularly about the self). This is also a central teaching of many modern Law of Attraction practitioners.

Helena Petrovna Blavatsky (1831 – 1891)

“The Universe is worked and guided from within outwards.” – Helena Petrovna Blavatsky

Often referred to as Madame Blavatsky, Helena Petrovna Blavatsky was a highly controversial spiritual teacher in the 19th century. Born in Southern Russia and raised by her maternal grandparents, she was quickly recognized as a highly gifted individual who appeared to have a deep capacity for intuition and empathy.

Some suspected she had occult or psychic powers, such as the level of her insight (though others claimed she was a fraud). Treated as a guru and spirit medium, she traveled all around the world during her lifetime. She ultimately died in 1981 after contracting a severe form of influenza.

Helena Blavatsky believed in an ancient religion that was once universal and argued that all later faiths grew from this religion. Helena Blavatsky books include The Secret Doctrine, which is likely her most influential work. In her work on mysteries and predictions, Helena Blavatsky mentions a principle that it broadly similar to the Law of Attraction.

It essentially states that people are who they think they are in their hearts. This principle once again emphasizes how our self-perceptions shape our identities and our realities, indicating that flexibility of thought can be used to create a better life.

Prentice Mulford (1834 – 1891)

“To say a thing ‘must be’, is the very power that makes it.” – Prentice Mulford

Prentice Mulford was an American author who significantly advanced the New Thought movement. After working as a miner, he earned a job at a weekly newspaper and later became a lecturer and humorist.

He died at age 57 in 1891, but his work is still popular today. Some view him as the first writer to begin properly developing the Law of Attraction. Communicating in a clear, direct style, his ideas are easily digestible and remain relevant. He also tended to offer real-life examples in support of his claims, drawing from his own experiences and those of others in his life.

Many of his essays and books arguably formed the basis of our contemporary Law of Attraction principles. In particular, Prentice Mulford quotes from Your Forces and How to Use Them are often used to illustrate how our thoughts impact the world around us.

In his books, Mulford discusses the Law of Attraction at considerable length. He takes this discussion beyond the early applications proposed by Phineas Quimby. Mulford’s books and works include: Thoughts Are Things; The Gift of Understanding; Gift of Spirit.

Prentice Mulford was one of the first New Thought authors to consider that the Law of Attraction could influence not just physical health but also opportunities and material acquisitions.

Wallace Delois Wattles (1860–1911)

“By thought, the thing you want is brought to you; by action you receive it.” – Wallace D. Wattles

Wallace Delois Wattles played a key role in popularizing the messages of the Law of Attraction. In addition to being a major member of the New Thought Movement, Wallace Wattles is enduringly popular, perhaps in large part due to his famous 1910 book The Science of Getting Rich.

As you’ll see in any Wallace Wattles biography, he was born in the American Midwest. He then traveled to collaborate with other New Thought leaders. He gave lectures in Chicago and wrote several monographs focusing on how our thoughts can influence everything from our health to our career prospects.

Wallace Wattle books are praised for being highly readable. In The Science of Getting Rich, Wallace Wattles encourages readers to try out his practical advice and offer feedback, rather than simply creating an image of himself as a guru. One of his most significant contributions to modern Law of Attraction practices is the technique of creative visualization.

This is a practice in which we imagine all the details of the life we want to create. While this meditative exercise has been updated and enhanced since Wattles first proposed it, it remains one of the most common and powerful techniques used by people working with the Law of Attraction.

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William Walker Atkinson (1862 – 1932)

“All persons ought to practice their visualizing power. This will react upon perception and make it more definite. Visualizing will also form a brain habit of remembering things pictorially, and hence more exactly.” – William W. Atkinson

William Walker Atikson is one of the most prolific New Thought Writers, with over a hundred books to his name (sometimes published under pseudonyms).

He was born and raised in Maryland and was a highly successful lawyer until the stress of his profession led to a mental and physical collapse.

In his search for healing, he connected with the existing New Thought literature and was inspired to do further work on how we can reshape our reality by changing our thinking. With the assistance of Sydney Flower, Atkinson edited a New Thought magazine and founded a school of mental science.

He also took up an editorship at New Thought journal and continued to practice law in later life.

For William Walker Atkinson, Law of Attraction work centers largely on the concepts of willpower, concentration, and personal magnetism. He draws from the teachings of Hinduism, and his published work includes collaborations with Hindu scholar Baba Bharata.

Many of our contemporary beliefs surrounding vibrations owe a debt to Atkinson. He helped to introduce the concepts and vocabulary required to think about how we raise and lower our vibrational frequency through our actions, and made crucial connections between our vibrations and our success.

Charles Francis Haanel (1866 – 1949)

“To acquire love… fill yourself up with it until you become a magnet.” – Charles Haanel

Charles F Haanel was an American author and is often viewed as a mysterious figure in the New Thought movement. He started his career in publishing in 1885, subsequently writing several important works on the Law of Attraction.

Charles Haanel is primarily known for his books The Law of Attraction In The Thought WorldandThe Master Key System (which sets out a range of practical principles and offers advice on how to apply them). In any Charles Haanel biography, it’s also always worth noting that he influenced other New Thought Writers, especially Napoleon Hill, who felt his work followed that of Haanel.

When we look at the current Law of Attraction literature, we can see several significant places in which Haanel’s work has been crucial. In particular, he developed the idea of attracting abundance and prosperity. He explored how these concepts relate to more than just financial success.

In addition, Haanel underlines the power of positivity. You’ll often see this at the center of the modern Law of Attraction guides. The thought is that if you cultivate a positive, generous mindset, you receive more positivity in return. Consequently, this creates a feedback loop that maximizes your chances of attaining a happy, satisfied life.

Ralph Waldo Trine (1866 – 1958)

“There is something in the universe that responds to brave, intrepid thought. The Power that holds and that moves the stars in their courses, fights for the brave and the upright. Courage has power and magic in it.” – Ralph Waldo Trine

Ralph Waldo Trine was a critically acclaimed author, philosopher and spiritual teacher. He grew up in Northern Illinois in the mid-to-late 19th century.

Trine went on to study history and politics at both the University of Wisconsin and John Hopkins University. When he later became a special correspondent for the Boston Daily Evening Transcript, he got married. In addition, he began to devote more of his time to metaphysical seminars in the area. Those who knew him viewed him as a thoughtful, considerate man. According to them, he was interested in helping people rather than achieving fame.

New thought quotes from Ralph Waldo Trine often focus on his belief that thought can be life-transforming. Similarly, his books on this topic are among the best selling in the Law of Attraction genre. In his book In Tune With the Infinite, he explored themes that are said to have inspired Napoleon Hill to write Think And Grow Rich.

Some of Trine’s most enduring contributions to the current Law of Attraction practice include the idea that the Law of Attraction isn’t something that you invoke. Rather, it is constantly at work, but your influence can change what you attract. He also suggested that working to form specific habits can play a key role in manifestation.

Oliver Napoleon Hill (1883 – 1970)

“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” – Napoleon Hill

A popular journalist, lecturer and self-help author in the New Thought Movement, Oliver Napoleon Hill was born in 1883. He later achieved fame following the publication of his book Think and Grow Rich. Though he had a complex personal life and several tumultuous relationships, following his own advice eventually led him to a happier life.

Napoleon Hill’s Law of Success popularised the use of Law of Attraction principles. It was especially popular and suited for those looking to improve their careers, as well as their finances. He believed that people could create a “rags to riches” narrative in their lives. In this way, success was possible for everyone. He cited Ralph Waldo Emerson as a major inspiration.

Napoleon Hill quotes often focus on the fact our expectations play a crucial role in determining what happens to us. His legacy in current Law of Attraction practices includes this message. In other words, if you expect to fail or to struggle, then this is what you will see in your life.

Meanwhile, if you work on truly believing that your potential is limitless, your reality will change to meet these expectations. In addition, his emphasis on identifying a person’s “true purpose” endures in contemporary manifestation techniques. This often focuses on discovering core values and talents.

William Clement Stone (1902 – 2002)

“Success is achieved and maintained by those who try and keep trying.” – W. Clement Stone

One of the most modern New Thought authors was William Clement Stone. He was a philanthropist and author of books on Law of Attraction techniques. Stone was born in Chicago in the early 20th century. Although he dropped out of school to become an insurance salesman, he subsequently became extremely successful.

Stone credited his achievements to the principles he learned in Napoleon Hill’s Think And Grow Rich. His own books include The Success System That Never Fails and the equally popular Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude (a co-authored monograph with Napoleon Hill).

W. Clement Stone is among the writers who both advocate and embody the power of positive thinking; emphasizing that we can only get what we want if we are confident in our capacity to attain it. He is well-known for the motivational phrase “If you think you can, do”.

Similarly, he lived in accordance with the phrase (seizing opportunities as they arrived). He also popularized the Law of Attraction technique that focuses on flipping negatives into positives. Believing that every difficult event can be the seed of a positive one, he encouraged people to rewrite their life narratives; this way they could evoke feelings of gratitude rather than a sense of being victimized.


What Now? Moving Forward…

“I’m so excited for what is about to come next for you. I’ve dedicated my life to this work and you are about to learn the exact same strategies that I have used to help many people all over the world. I’m talking about real folks – just like you – who are looking for a way to make the amazing Law of Attraction work for them in a consistently positive way. Now, I’m going to help you do the same. With love, Katherine Hurst

The men and women you just read about really did make an impact on the world and more specifically, on The Law Of Attraction community. They have certainly influenced me!

We are still learning about ourselves, about our species, our solar system, and our power. For example, did you know that the electrical field within your heart is 60 times greater in amplitude than your brain waves? And you can use this in your manifestation practices!

Click play below to discover more, risk-free.

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Do you ever find yourself thinking of people as all good or all bad? For example, perhaps when you fall for someone you think they are wonderful, and when you have your first fight you suddenly want to run for the hills. Meanwhile, do you tend to take an “all or nothing” approach to life, seeing yourself as a failure if you don’t meet every single goal? If these types of scenarios sound familiar to you, then you just might be struggling with black and white thinking. And while you might know on a rational level that life works in shades of grey, you may find it incredibly difficult to see your own life in this way.

So, what can you do if you’re a black and white thinker? And why is it so important to develop a more nuanced perspective? This guide will explain the concept of dichotomous thinking and help you work on seeing shades of grey.

What Is Dichotomous Reasoning?

In psychology, the term “dichotomous reasoning” is used to refer to a tendency to see things in black and white. So, if you find yourself classing everything as amazing or terrible (with nothing in between), you’re likely using dichotomous reasoning.

What it means is that you find it hard to see experiences and people as containing a mix of both positive and negative traits, when in reality things are ever rarely purely good or purely bad. You may also apply this type of reasoning to yourself, resulting in a very hard inner critic and chronically fluctuating self-esteem.

Why Is Black And White Thinking A Problem?

Black and white thinking causes a range of personal and relational difficulties, including the following:

  • A limited ability to see opportunities (especially those involving compromises)
  • Low mood
  • Lack of receptivity to advice from others
  • Unpredictability
  • Isolation (when others are viewed as not good enough)
  • A sense of being “addicted” to dramatic, high-stakes situations
  • Fatigue from high levels of cortisol (the stress hormone)
  • In relationships, black and white thinking can lead to a rollercoaster of extreme emotions

In short, a life filled with dichotomous reasoning is an exhausting one in which it’s hard to stay close to others, and crucial opportunities for growth are missed or ignored.

How To Stop Black And White Thinking

In your own psychology, black and white thinking can seem totally natural until someone highlights the profound, long-term difficulties that it causes. Consequently, it takes time, effort and concentration to develop new thinking patterns.

In some cases, you may also feel that you need therapy sessions, or potentially meditation in order to address mood swings. However, the following five strategies will begin to set you on the right path. They all focus on encouraging you to view yourself, your loved ones and your life choices in a different light, training your mind to see shades of grey that you’ve previously ignored.

1. Accept That You’re Not Perfect

When you’re learning how to stop black and white thinking, the first thing you need to do is accept that none of us are perfect.

Expecting yourself to always be at your smartest, funniest and most morally good will only ever lead to self-loathing and disappointment. It is enough to simply be good enough; to strive to be the best version of yourself, and to view yourself as a constant work in progress. Expecting perfection creates a moving target that you can never hit, setting you up for a life of dissatisfaction.

To challenge your assumption that perfection is needed, think about the people you value and respect the most. When you really look at them, they too will have personal flaws, struggles, and difficulties. This helps to show you that perfect is an unattainable ideal.

In addition, reflect on the times you were happiest or felt most proud, reminding yourself of what you can achieve without being perfect.

2. Stop And Ask Why

The next time you feel yourself drifting towards black and white thinking, stop yourself right there and ask why you’re viewing the situation (or the person) in this light. Indeed, it will serve you well to look even further back in your life. Can you remember when you first started splitting the world into two broad categories of “good” and “bad”? Have you always been this way?

In many cases, dichotomous reasoning develops in childhood. Your parents, who may themselves have struggled to accept their flaws, may have modeled this reasoning. Alternatively, you might remember being told you were a “good child” and felt huge amounts of guilt whenever you failed to live up to that standard.

Regardless of the origin of your thinking, becoming increasingly aware of the causes helps you to make a new, conscious decision about whether you really believe the world is split into good and bad.

3. Try To Find The Gray In One Situation Today

One of the most practical techniques you can use to change your thinking is to cultivate a daily habit of seeing shades of grey (not just black and white reasoning). In particular, challenge yourself to find at least one situation that tempts you to apply dichotomous reasoning. Then, deliberately look at that situation from a different (non-extreme) angle.

For example, perhaps your friend forgets to call you for the first time; try seeing this as a potentially excusable failing and accident, rather than something that indicates this person will always be a bad friend.

Alternatively, if you don’t do as well as you’d have liked at something, prompt yourself to see what you do like about what you did.

When practiced daily, this simple exercise can create a whole new default. You might also consider keeping a notebook of short descriptions of each daily scenario, first writing the “black and white”judgment and then the “shades of grey” interpretation.

4. Start To Track Your Thoughts

As well as using exercises that prompt more nuanced thinking, it can be really helpful to just become more aware of your thinking in general. This will make you more likely to notice instances of dichotomous thinking, stopping them before they get out of control. There are lots of things you can do in order to boost your self-awareness and track your thoughts. Some people like to set a timer (e.g. on their phone) once an hour, prompting them to notice and reflect on what they’re thinking about in that moment. Others like to keep a daily journal.

Mindfulness techniques also increase your reflective capacities and can help to mitigate the stress-inducing effects of cortisol. Try a 5-10 minute breathing or body scanning exercise before you start or end your day, and focus on simply accepting what you feel (without judgment). This process can assist with your ongoing attempt to accept imperfection, too.

5. Learn What Balanced Thinking Is

As noted above, when you tend towards black and white thinking it can feel like second nature to view things in this way. Consequently, your brain may spin a dramatic narrative or spark intense emotions before you even have much time to consider whether you’re seeing a situation realistically. One thing that can help with this is using a role model to learn what balanced thinking really looks like.

You don’t necessarily have to ask someone to walk you through their thought processes. It may be enough to just practice perspective-taking, with a particular friend or family member in mind. So, when something tricky happens at work, take a deep breath and ask yourself how someone mellow, reasonable (and maybe even a little boring!) would view this situation. Carry your imagined version of this person’s perspective everywhere you go, checking it against your own instinctive response. Gradually, your assessments should become more balanced and realistic.

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When people think about abusive relationships, they often imagine bruises, punches, and cuts. However, emotional abuse can be just as harmful to your well-being, even though it does not leave physical scars. If you’ve been emotionally abused, you’ll know this only too well. Often, there are complex long-term effects of verbal and emotional abuse. These can influence everything from your self-confidence to how you approach new relationships in the future.

We’ll look at some of the main effects of emotional abuse, helping you to identify them in your own life, and then we’ll turn to explore the most effective ways to deal with the impact this abuse has had. Whether you suspect that you’re in an abusive dynamic or you’ve left an abusive relationship and want to heal, this guide will help you understand yourself a little bit better and help you to formulate a plan for the future.

What Is Emotional Abuse?

First, let’s build up a picture of what emotional abuse looks like, and consider what constitutes emotional abuse.

There are many different signs, but some of the most common include the following:

  • Threats (e.g. to abandon you if you don’t do what they say). Or, adopting a generally threatening demeanor by shouting and using aggressive body language.
  • Frequently criticizing and belittling you, making you feel worthless or calling you names.
  • Encouraging you to doubt your own sanity or rationality (e.g. calling you oversensitive, denying past instances of abuse or undermining the worth of your opinion).
  • Emotionally manipulating you by withdrawing affection to induce guilt.
  • Controlling your access to money or making you account for all instances of spending.
  • Telling you how to dress or how to wear your hair.
  • Accusing you of infidelity and attempting to isolate you from friends.

All of these behaviors are designed to make you under confident and dependent on the abuser.

Effects Of Emotional Abuse

What does emotional abuse feel like? Effects of emotional abuse will vary according to your background, the nature of your relationship, and your particular vulnerabilities.

In addition, how you feel will partly depend on whether you’re still embroiled in the abusive dynamic or are in the process of moving on. That said, there are certain key effects of emotional abuse from parents, partners, siblings, and friends that appear in almost all cases.

1. Numbness

You may feel at a constant distance from the world; things that used to make you feel happy or sad may leave you feeling nothing at all. Relatedly, you might get the sense that your heart is under impenetrable guard, incapable of allowing you to feel close to anyone new.

2. Seeking Approval

Abusive relationships undermine your self-worth, so you find yourself having to solicit positive feedback from others in order to feel okay. At all times, you’ll carry a sense of not being good enough. You’ll likely also worry about annoying people all the time and are excessively focused on people-pleasing behaviors.

3. Resentment

Of all the effects of emotional abuse on marriage, resentment is one of the longest lasting. You may feel angry at all the time, lose your temper easily, and feel like screaming. You might resent everyone from your abuser to yourself, and replay past events while fixating on how things “should” have been different.

4. Anxiety And Depression

The effects of emotional abuse on the brain include mental health issues like anxiety and depression, as your mind struggles to deal with the blows to your self-esteem. Symptoms include trouble sleeping, fearfulness, discomfort in social situations, and a pervasive sense of hopelessness. Anxiety and depression can also manifest physically, causing appetite changes, sweating and a racing heart.

If you are ready to cut the negative energy cord in your life, move on and clear your own limiting beliefs, then you should definitely read Joe Vitale’s new ebook, Clearing Negativity From Your Life: A Guide To Using The Ho'oponopono Method. As a featured teacher in ‘The Secret‘ movie, Joe Vitale has some AMAZING tips on how to break through to your best self (taking you to a high place of consciousness). You can get your free copy by clicking here now.

How To Deal With Emotional Abuse

Recovering from the long-term effects of abusive relationships takes time, and it is rarely a linear process. However, healing is certainly possible.

Here are four steps you can take to begin your journey towards moving on, developing healthy relationships and recovering your self-esteem. You may find it helpful to engage in some form of therapy at the same time (or to discuss medication with your doctor if you’re struggling with anxiety or depression).

1. Understand The Abuser

It’s possible to learn how to stop being emotionally abusive, but the person has to really want to do so. Understanding your abuser isn’t about validating their behavior; it’s about demystifying it, and seeing that it has a cause completely unrelated to your own personal worth. Think about where they learned these behaviors, and what purpose they’re serving.

2. Know Your Rights

There are important practical aspects of learning how to deal with emotional abuse. In particular, remember that you have the right to chose whether to be in a relationship and the right to be treated with respect (even if you disagree with a partner). You also have the right to refuse sex at any time.

3. Don’t Retaliate

One of the realities about verbal and emotional abuse is that you’ll feel an urge to retaliate. Your abuser may push you to do so. However, you will suffer the consequences if you lower yourself to their level, so take a deep breath and try to remove yourself from the situation before you strike back.

4. Get Your Power Back

You can influence how emotional abuse affects future relationships. Taking your power back is about walking away from the abusive dynamic, and making your own decisions about what you want your life to look like. This is easier with support, so speak out about what you’ve been through. There’s no shame in being a victim of abuse.


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