#apologize
I just want to apologize you for not posting anything new. I have been having a tough time lately. Also I am late with that post…
Here is the list.
- shirts - 2 donated
- underwear - 3 donated
- cloth for cleaning glasses - donated
- pendants - 3 donated
- pencil cases - 2 donated
- box of drawing pins - donated
- toy - donated
- pen - donated
- charcoals - 2 donated
- earphones - donated
- brushes - 1 donated, 8 thrown away
- pot plant - gave away
- tape - gave away
- thermometer - gave away
- badge - gave away
- hula-hoop - sold
- skirt - sold
- DVDs - 2 sold
- onesie - sold
- broken pot - thrown away
- trousers - 2 thrown away
- magazines - 2 thrown away
- calendar - thrown away
- bookmark - thrown away
- notebooks - 2 thrown away
- coursebook - thrown away
- CDs - 3 thrown away
- CD storage boxes - thrown away
- documents sleeves - thrown away
- small bag - thrown away
- a lot of copies - thrown away
- slippers - thrown away
- shopping bag - thrown away
- lighter - thrown away
- blanket - thrown away
- hair sprays - 5 thrown away
- body creams - 3 thrown away
- decorative jars - 2 thrown away
- decorative box - thrown away
- lipsticks - 2 thrown away
- tablespoon - thrown away
- lunch box - thrown away
- shampoos - 2 thrown away
- ruler - thrown away
- film reel - thrown away
- glue pads - thrown away
- ink - thrown away
- incomplete decks of cards - 2 thrown away
And it is 761 of 1000 things!
Hang in there!
Love Story (1970) Jenny Cavilleri
None of us are perfect. For today’s challenge, offer a sincere apology to someone you’ve hurt in the past. That can be online, over the phone, or even in person. Then reblog this image with the tag #MonthOfAction to inspire others to step up to the plate. http://bit.ly/MonthOfAction-26
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I still remember clearly the first time I was caned at school.
It was during the first term of my secondary education and it was because of Miss Green, a trainee teacher who didn’t know how to control the class. The volume of the murmurs and chattings in class were increasing without her stopping them until suddenly she stared at me (who was sitting in the front row) and sent me to the Headmistress’s office arguing that it was me the one who was disrupting the lesson.
It was completely unfair. Of course I was chatting and not paying attention but just the same of the rest of my mates were doing!
Even worse, she also said that she wanted “an apology from me after my chat with the Headmistress”. That was too much!
I was not willing to look for her after the lessons just to apology besides being unfairly punished. Doing that, would be against my chivalry pride, so I left the classroom willing to ignore that order. I’d rather prefer to cope a second caning from the Head than to submit unfairly to that bitch.
Well at least, those were my thoughts before my first meeting with the cane.
When I managed to get out of the Headmistress office, I could hardly walk. I had burst in tears and my striped bottom hurt like if I were sitting on a grill on fire! The cane hurt much more than the worst of my expectations.
At that moment the words of the teacher asking for an apology resounded in my head and my brain recovered its function.
I had to put my pride aside, there were not way to endure a second punishment like that!
So I went to the toilets, washed my face out and rushed to find Miss Green who was sitting on the corridor’s benches.
I apologized for whatever I had done wrong since the moment I was born. The pain of the scorchers pf my backside looked like being increasing with the pass of time, I think that if she had asked me to kneel and kiss her feet, I would had done it without any doubt.
Years later, I cannot but to think how many times in my life I have had to put my pride aside and… how nice it would had been having to kiss her feet!
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Kik smiledom
Skype domofslaves
If u are open minded lady and never shy from anything kik me.i am here for you.
Daddy loves you.
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“The three hardest things you will ever have to say are I love you, I am sorry, and I need help!”
Recently I have had to say all three. I want you to know that no matter how bad I want to protect you, you will experience heartbreak, failure, disappointment…things that push you past your limit.
In those moments it is important to remember who you are, what you stand for and not let the situation get the best of you. Trust Mommy on this one, I have been there…
I recently wrote a letter to a few people, I want you to have it.
“Dear people who mean the most to me,
For awhile now I have been having trouble sleeping trying to figure out exactly how to verbalize what I want to say. As most of you know, 2012 was NOT my year (pa, uncle Billy, both of slims grandmas, postpartum, job, marriage issues, new mom panic). I have spent a lot of time reflecting on 2012 and I owe you all an apology.
I wish I was stronger and didn’t fall into feeling sorry for myself, but I did immensely and I said things, did things and was childish, jealous and not myself because while my world was crumbling, it was very difficult to watch everyone else be so normal.
I wanted to write to you because I realize that the people I love got the brunt of what I was going through. I am very sorry for any and everything that I may have done. I was not there for people the way I wanted to be, I said things that I never would have said, I hurt people…the people I love the most. I am sorry.
I was miserable and instead of fixing it, I fell into misery loves company. What I learned is that, when you hurt the people you love, it doesn’t make you feel better…it makes you feel worse. I wish I would have learned this all sooner. and for those who have lived the long haul with me, I appreciate the years of putting up with dramatics and my over the top personality and the unconditional love you have shown me regardless. I know I haven’t always been the easiest person to deal with…at times demanding and downright oblivious to the needs of those around me. I am sorry.
Over the past few months two things have really called me to question myself and everything around me. 1. Slim’s hospitalization and 2. going to the most intense marriage/self counseling ever.
What I learned from those two situations: I did not like at all the person that I was in 2012 (and probably longer, but mostly 2012) , I wasn’t the best wife, mother, or friend that I could be. LIFE IS SHORT and most importantly, it is NEVER too late to change and be the person that you want to be, the person that you need to be.
Instead of punishing myself anymore for how I was I finally decided to make some changes and I did. I know that it is very hard to see past history especially when you have a history of passive aggression, dramatics, etc and even worse if you experienced the 2012 version of me, but I can promise you that hindsight is 20/20.
I apologize again for not being there like I should have been, for saying things to make myself feel better, for being miserable in my own situation and taking it out on you. Moving forward, if you choose to be around, I ask that you trust that 2012 has taught me my biggest lesson yet and you at least give me the chance to show you the changes, not just tell you.
It is a horrible feeling to feel like a different person, know that you are…and still have to deal with being told who you are because people know you so well. Yes, you all know me very well…but sometimes something happens called progress and character development and that is what has been happening. Now that I am done shutting myself off and being miserable to the people I love, I would love if you would take some time to get to know me… I am still me, just a 2.0 version that I promise you will enjoy more and who will never again take out my self pity on the people i love the most again.
Thank you for listening!
Love yelly”
You will mess up baby girl, but learning to say you are sorry, asking for help, and telling the people who mean the most to you that you love them…that’s what is important! You have to learn from the tough moments! You know what I learned? That Unconditional love is incredible!
Here are some of the responses I received from my letter…
“Don’t need to read it all to tell you I LOVE YOU unconditionally.”
“I love you. We all go through rough patches in our life and lucky for most of us we push on and are able to see our "down falls. ” You are loved by many and for very good reason, you are a kind and loving person who is always trying to find new ways to be a better person.“
"You will be successful no matter what you do because you have a powerful mind and an everlasting determination. Sometimes when I am frustrated in life and am lost without understanding I forget I am not alone. I forget that there is always someone watching over me and that those who have loved and sacrificed for me have a better plan.”
“No needs to apologize. Friends are there thru thick and thin.”
“I am glad you want to change for the better but I also think you are pretty great.”
“Yelli, I love you for you. And this isn’t some sappy bull crap its the truth. I love all my friends because they are true to themselves, pure real and raw characters. I’ve always respected your blatant honesty even though it may be hard to swallow, your spit fire personality with mirroring humor, and your love for drama (don’t lie, you like that shit).”
Honestly baby girl, I wasn’t expecting a response, that was not the intention of the letter but what it taught me was priceless. The people that love you, and I mean REALLY love you. They don’t disappear because you make a mistake or ten, they love you through your mistakes! It was important for me to share this with you because I need you to know that Mommy isn’t perfect, but more importantly that when you feel overwhelmed, lost, disappointed in yourself and your choices…there will ALWAYS be someone who loves you through it. In fact I am willing to bet that there will be many people who love you through it. You will always be good enough, and I hope you never feel like you are not!
But in case you ever do, in your worst moments…I will be here to remind you that I once was where you are and that unconditional love is a beautiful thing!
Love you so very unconditionally!
-Mom
