#marvel quotes

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Loki: A Summary

Loki: Don’t worry, I’ve got a few knives up my sleeve.

Bruce: I think you mean “tricks”?

Thor: He did not.

Loki, pulling knives out of his sleeves: I did not.

Steve, stroking Tony’s hair: You’re so tiny and adorable.

Tony, half asleep: I could literally kick your ass right now.

Steve, looking at Tony with heart eyes: I know.

Peter: Tony! Can I ride this scooter Steve gave me?

Tony: sure whatever, I mean I’m not your dad.

Peter, running out: okay! thanks!

Tony, screaming after him: NOT ON THE STREET! STAY AWAY-

Peter: everyone keeps telling me what Tony would or wouldn’t want.

Peter: WELL GUESS WHAT, I’M MY OWN DAD NOW!

Peter: I’M GONNA HAVE COOKIES FOR BREAKFAST AND BEDTIME IS NEVER!

Tony, from the afterlife: fuck ‘em up son!

Rhodey: How do you manage all these kids you keep getting?

Tony: The secret is, I don’t. I have no control over them whatsoever.

Tony: This morning Morgan yelled out to me and when I showed up to see what was going on, Peter shot me in the throat with a nurf gun.

Tony: You can’t make everyone like you, you’re not Peter.

Steve: What? Not everyone likes Peter.

Tony: Who doesn’t?

Steve: Well-

Tony: Names, now, Steve. GIVE ME THIER NAMES!

Tony, deathly hungover: Please tell me I’m imagining that I claimed I was the king of ducks.

Steve, sipping his coffee: I would, but then I would be lying to the king of ducks.

Tony, sarcastically: Yeah, everything is great. We are just one big happy family. We are all having a great time.

Also Tony: I want to set either myself or this compound on fire.

Peter: I would kill for you, Mr Thor!

Thor, gripping his shoulder: Well, that’s not necessary-

Peter: Oh, that’s a relief, because I would do it, but it would weigh on me.

Tony, holding a cauliflower in front of Steve’s face: what is this?

Steve: … a cauliflower?

Tony, to Peter: now tell Steve what you think it is.

Peter, arms folded: ghost broccoli

Steve: I’m going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to react, okay?

Tony: Sure.

Steve: If you want to live give me all your money!

Peter, loudly: Bold of you to assume I have any money.

Tony, over everyone’s shit: Bold of you to assume I want to live.

Peter: There are just some sounds that everyone loves. Like shoes on gravel.

Tony: Rain hitting the roof.

Steve: The crackling of a fire.

Natasha: The snapping of the necks of those who think they can disrespect you.

*Peter suddenly appears in the space ship*

Tony: Peter! You’re back! What happened?

Peter: I was starting to sing Bubblegum Bitch for the 12th time in the soul stone and it just yeeted me out.

*Somewhere far away*

Tony: Peter just did something stupid, I can feel it. Why am I surprised? Don’t you ‘greater good’ and 'please trust me Mr. Stark.’ I wouldn’t trust that boy with a plastic spoon.

Rhodey: This is big dad energy.

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