#source the big bang theory

Ayda: Is Adaine always like this when she loses?

Fig:Yeah. You should’ve been here for the Great Jenga Tantrum of 2008.

Adaine: YOU BUMPED THE TABLE AND YOU KNOW IT!

Dutch: Hosea’s mad at me and I don’t know why.

Arthur: Were you talking to him before he got mad?

Dutch: Yeah, why?

Arthur: That’s probably the reason.

Michael: Sorry I’m late for class.

Chidi: What happened?

Michael: Nothing, I just didn’t wanna be here.

Michael: You still pining over Chidi?

Eleanor: Our babies will be both smart and beautiful.

Michael: Not to mention fictional.

Eleanor:

Michael: You’re dead!

Eleanor: You guys want some cheesecake?

Chidi: I love cheesecake!

Michael: You’re lactose intolerant.

Chidi: I don’t eat it, I just think it’s a good idea.

Giorno: Good morning!

Abbacchio: Giorno, it’s 8 AM. It’s like the middle of the night.

DragonslayerWedding

Official: Before I go any further, have either of you prepared your own vows?

Jaune:Yes.

Yang: No. You wrote vows?

Jaune:Yeah.

Yang: Well, I don’t have any. You’re kind of making me look bad.

Jaune: It’s okay. I don’t have to say them.

Yang: No, no, no, go ahead. I’ll come up with something mushy, you’ll cry, we got this.

Jaune: Yang, ever since we got together, you have become the sunshine of my entire life. You have helped me become someone that I can truly be proud of. I wish to be someone that you can rely on whenever you need help, as I will forever love you with all my being.

Yang, emotional:Wow.

Official:Yang?

Yang: Right. Um, okay. Jaune, I mean, you’re not only the love of my life. I mean, you’re my best friend, and, you’ve got a friend in me. You got troubles. I got ’em, too. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you. We stick together, and we can see it through, ’cause you’ve got a friend in me.

Official: …Is that the song from Toy Story?

Yang: He loves that movie.

Jaune, crying tears of joy: I do.

Hades: Damn you’re violent

Persephone: Yeah, but I’m short so it’s adorable

Brett: I’ll help my mother in the kitchen. Why don’t you go keep my father company?

Reagan: He doesn’t want me out there. I’m the creepy guy who has sex with his son.

Brett: Don’t be silly, he loves you.

Reagan: Does he?

Brett:…

Brett: Probably more than me. Since you own Cognito and all— Okay, he cares about you a lot.

Reagan:Really?

Brett:…

Brett: I do crap for you all the time. Get out there.

Sherlock: You’re pouting.

Jim: I’m not pouting, I’m brooding. It’s how sexy men pout.

Yutani: Here’s what I wonder about zombies: what happens if they can’t get any human flesh to eat? They can’t starve to death, they’re already dead!

Tricky: You take this one. I spent an hour last night on “How do vampires shave when they can’t see themselves in the mirror”

Fresh: Well-groomed vampires meet in pairs and shave each other. Case closed.

11: [when he’s doing something odd] Aren’t you going to ask?

River: What is this, my first day?

10: I was acting odd intentionally.

Donna: Really? So you can control it?

Sydney: Did you and Zach get in a fight?

Dan: Zach had a fight. I was being completely reasonable

Murr: At my age, do you know how I’m statistically most likely to die?

Sal, Q, and Joe: At the hands of your best friends?

Murr: An accident.

Sal, Q, and Joe: Oh, that’s how we’re gonna make it look.