#actually anxiety
Hello friends! I am very excited about how well I feel my blog has been doing and am very proud. My notes have hit new peaks in the thousands and I never dreamed that I would finally be doing what I have wanted to do for years.
I don’t know who really checks my blog or if I have any frequent people but, I talked about the things I wanted to do with this blog during the summer that I haven’t delivered on. I Feel disappointed that I haven’t been delivering my original content like promised and I wanted to talk about some personal things that have been effecting me recently that aren’t really blog theme related.
First, although neurodiversity related issues such as adhd and autism are the theme of this blog my issues don’t end there. One of the issues I have struggled with very hard is anxiety; I have multiple anxiety disorders that impact me a lot.
I want to do well with my blog and make an impact. I want to not only make you laugh but help everyone understand these issues and maybe themselves a little bit better. But, writing a blog can be a bit daunting. What you say are things you can’t take back and are a reflection of your blog and even you that can carry on.
When my anxiety spikes, this blog can be stressful for me because I don’t want to screw up and say something wrong. I don’t want to give the wrong advice, or offend someone, produce ignorant facts or any number of other things. Sometimes this makes me tentative to post new material. Not only this but trying to keep up the quality control I try to have.
Secondly, something that I don’t think gets talked about in the neurodiversity community enough is how hard it can be for some of us to produce written content at all. By the time I post content I have rewritten it anywhere from 3-12 times over.
From the inability to summarize information or differentiate irrelevant information from critical details to spelling and grammar mistakes it takes a lot of tries to produce good content. Half of the time mistakes aren’t the kind Word can catch, such as skipped words or conjoining words etc.
This means that I have to continuously re-read over and over and even have others check my details for me to make sure what I am saying is accurate and coherent. Even then I often find simple errors in my writing after I post them.
Third, recently there has been a very serious concern in my family that has had us all stressed. I don’t get along with my family the greatest to begin with, but I also wanted to be there during what could adequately be called a family crisis. I don’t want to go into detail, but it has been a very stressful couple months, but thankfully everything is okay for now with regards to that.
Lastly, I have had my own stressful adventure with physical health concerns. I have a number of strange issues which have gone unaddressed for a long time and last month it felt like they all sort of boiled over at once. I have been in the E.R. (nothing serious don’t worry.) and trying to get different doctors appointments so I can finally get some answers and hopefully be far less stressed out about it.
All and all, this have impacted my content on Tumblr. which is by far the biggest sadness for me at current time. I just wanted to let you all know that I have no intention of leaving Tumblr. Or taking a leave from my blog at current time. It may be a bit sporadic for a period, but I have a whole file of posts I am wanting to make but need help editing into “final edit” quality and so they can be posted.
This blog is meaningful to me. It may be small right now, but it is important to me and I have ambitions that I intend to carry out at some point soon. I hope anyone reading this is understanding and will continue to support this blog. I look forward to my return into full swing.
I hope you all have an amazing day!!! You are all great! <3
Some people just don’t understand how validating a diagnosis can be. Like with my parents, they worried that getting a diagnosis would be “letting it define me,” and that “there’s no point in confirming what we already know.” But having a professional sit down and tell you you’re not faking or overreacting is so relieving. Of course, there are downsides and not everybody feels the need for one, but if someone wants a diagnosis, listen to them.
