Some people just don’t understand how validating a diagnosis can be. Like with my parents, they worried that getting a diagnosis would be “letting it define me,” and that “there’s no point in confirming what we already know.” But having a professional sit down and tell you you’re not faking or overreacting is so relieving. Of course, there are downsides and not everybody feels the need for one, but if someone wants a diagnosis, listen to them.
Can I ask someone who’s been to residential a question?
I’m being admitted to residential tommorow morning and I want to know more about the admission process, what’s it like? Is there a strip search? How closely do they check your bags?
Dude one thing I never hear people talk about trauma is that it can rob you of your discretion and individual decision making skills. I’m so afraid to trust myself making life choices that I have a crew of people I ask and legit many of them are idiots who always make me doubt my instincts. Someone gaslights you and you learn how to doubt your own mind. This goes quintuple for those who have experienced mania, psychosis, disassociation or any other mental illness mind alternated state. I am getting very tired of the feeling of asking others for permission and advice. It’s taken a million years to get to this point but I know my own mind and I know what I need from my life.
Hey everyone, it’s mod Kyle (formerly mod Skyler)! I made a discord channel for those with bipolar disorder, and I was hoping you would join, or at the least reblog this, so that we can gain members and create a supportive community. So if you want to join, click here! The rules are as follows:
1. You must be 13 or older to join this server
2. You must be 18 or older to view the #nsfw channel (you must have the adult role to view this channel)
3. No bigotry allowed (no transphobia, homophobia, racism, ableism, etc.)
4. Keep discourse in #discourse and nowhere else (you must have the discourse role to view this channel)
5. If you have any ideas about how to best improve this server, drop them in #suggestions
6. Please introduce yourself in introductions and make sure to include your age group (adult or minor), bipolar type (if you want to share), and pronouns! Also let me know if you want the discourse role, and if you have any triggers you need tagged!
- Mod Kyle (feel free to message me at @pandapunk or on discord at Kyle#4146 if you have any questions or concerns)
Sometimes I think I don’t have social anxiety but then again I just took 25 minutes to hit send on an email because I was worried it was worded poorly or somehow broke a social norm or something so idk
full offence but you deserve to be at peace with being alive
Please don’t ever give up on getting the proper help that you need and working on your recovery Even though I know that it can be such hard work, and feel agonizingly slow - please don’t ever give up. If you learn to win the war in your own mind, you can win the war against the world. You NEED to believe in you.You GOT this. Your disorder / trauma / insecurity / abuser is lying to you when they say that you don’t. YouDO.
Finding peace is worth EVERY effort Please don’t ever give up
Ok so this post is extremely long and I put it all together for my blogs Feeling sad page but as I don’t have a huge amount of followers I realize so many people are not seeing this information so I’m posting it here too!
alternatives without harming yourself:
holding/squeezing ice.
splashing your face with water.
getting a rubber band and snapping it against your skin (this could hurt, though it’s better than other ways that people usually choose to self-harm).
take a hot shower or bath.
eat something sour. it will take your mind of the urge. (lemon, sour lollies)
massage where you want to self-harm.
get a red pen or red paint and draw/paint over where you usually self-harm.
remind yourself as to why you shouldn’t do it. (scars, harms organs, leave memories etc…)
describe what you are feeling. (is the urge/pain in your chest, fists, legs, arms, head).
killing yourself will not help. it is not a solution.
you have your whole life ahead of you. you have so many more years that you can accomplish things in. for example;
i’ve been seeing a lot of topics like “how to deal with someone who has bpd” and it always bothers me, because there is basically no topics about how to deal if YOU have bpd. that’s why i’m making this post, in my opinion as someone who has bpd. feel free to leave other tips and comment!
buy a notepad and write about your emotions. in DBT (dialectical behavior therapy), used a lot to help people with BPD, they tend to help others to regulate their emotions, basing on some principles, like:
identify and classify emotions; usually, people with BPD suffered/suffer from emotional abuse and it makes harder for us to have a knowledge about our feelings, since we never had someone to help us in this aspect. if you have hard times dealing with your emotions, you can create a special organization on your notepad, basing on: what just happened that could be a possibly trigger to your feeling? (EVEN IF IT’S SOMETHING MINOR, for example, if your friend replied to you in a different way, if you saw an image that made you feel uncomfortable); what are your physical symptoms about it? (for example, if you feel butterflies in your stomach, you are possibly anxious); what does this feeling make you want to do? (for example, if you feel like you want to hit something, you are possibly experiencing anger). and, also, try to identify your primary and secondary emotions, for example, if a friend forgets about an event that you would go together, first you may feel anger, but this anger can be followed by frustation or sadness (secondary emotions).
how to “change” your emotions; after writing about your emotions and trying to learn about them, you can add a subject in your notepad about “WHAT CAN I DO TO CHANGE THIS FEELING”. your first thoughts may be pessimists, specially because borderlines areVERYimpulsives, like “i should probably self-harm” or even “i should probably kill myself”, due to the intensity of bpd emotions, but right now, you have to think with your rationality.for example, if your friend is delaying to reply, you can think about the possibilities that are causing this problem: if they are busy, if they are having a hard time or if they just don’t want to talk right now. after thinking about the situation as a whole, you’ll ask yourself “okay, but what will i do?” and that’s why i think it’s important to create a list about what makes you happy and what distracts you, so everytime you have a hard situation to deal with, you can check on your list. “oh, i’m having x problem, but in my list it says that painting makes me happy, so what about painting something i saw today?”. if you don’t have anything that you like about, there is an app called Calm Harm, that can help you in self-harm situations!
increase and improve positive emotional events; i know that it’s difficult for us to focus on positive moments, but once you are feeling down, please try to write about what happened in your day that was a good thing. and when i say it, i don’t mean a BIG thing, it can be something like seeing a flower in your garden. write about your sensations when your experienced this moment and think about the possibility of living this moment more than once.for example, if i saw a flower and it made me happy, can i try to plant one, so i’ll see it more often?
apply pressure tolerance techniques; by distraction, self-care, improving the moment and considering pros and cons.
SO, in your notepad, have a space to: first, identify and classify your emotions; second, a space to write about how to change your emotions; third, a space to write about positive emotional events and fourth, write about what pressure tolerance techniqures you can apply to your life.
practice saying no and saying what you need to the people around you; sometimes people with BPD tend to think that we are a burden to friends and family, and sometimes it’s not true. due to it, we often don’t tell what we really want. so, if you could, please, practice sayingNO and what you REALLY need and want to people around you, even if it’s minor things.for example, if someone asks you to lunch with them, but you can’t/don’t want to, don’t let your abandonment fear decides what it’s the best for you, just say no, but not in the intention to hurt the other person. “i’m sorry, i really like you, but i can’t or don’t want to, since i have to do x thing/feeling x thing, but i really like you!”. when you say no, you can have a better idea about what you like and what you don’t, so you can start to let people know about it.for example, “hey! yesterday i said no when you invited me for lunch, so i realized i don’t really like going to public places, what about having lunch in my house next time?”
practice breathing techniques; intense emotions can lead us to panic situations or really bad physical symptoms. in stressing moments, we hold the air, increasing the level of carbon dioxide in our system, so the organism thinks we need more oxygen and make us breathe faster. the imbalance increases our heart beats, our blood pressure and the release of hormones such as adrenaline. i recommend ASMR videos to relax and you can breathe slowly, imagining a circle opening and closing, like the gif:
the post is getting long, so i’ll finish here! i’ll probably post a part two if you guys like! please leave a comment if it was helpful and i’m sorry if my grammar wasn’t very correct, english is not my native language.
remember that everything here is theoritical and it’s hard to apply these tips in your life, things will not suddenly change. but i believe in you and things take time, so don’t give up on getting better.
I don’t usually comment on posts like this but for over an entire year I suffered majorly from panic disorder experiencing DOZENS of panic attacks a day, to the point where it was a problem for me to leave the house or even my bed! Until one night i was freaking the Fuck Out, i was like! Screw it! I’ll make a run for it! I left the house at like 2am and just walked. Run a little occasionally and get REALLY angry while doing it and the panic would disappear! Instead of giving my head room to panic i’d give myself a goal: just walk around the block twice and THEN see how you feel. And reeaaally focus on that goal. Sometimes it’d take 3 hours to pass and sometimes only 10 minutes, but not once, to this day, has just getting out there and give into the fight or flight response not helped. By taking action you’re tricking your brain into regaining control when you feel out of control during panic/anxiety!
[Start I.D.: therapist Hack: anxiety is physical, so it needs a physical response, AKA fight or flight, take a walk for ten minutes it tricks your brain into thinking you’re running away, you will start to feel relieved. End I.D.]
Additionally to walking, biking does something similar while:
1) taking pressure off knees, feet, joints
2) some might feel socially anxious and not want to converse passing people on foot… you can just zoom on a bike and no worries
3) similarly the brain can be something of an ouroboros and by giving the reptilian brain (which controls muscle memory, driving, things you don’t often actively “think” about) an activity as simple as turning some pedals and steering… it gets the fuck out of the way.
Both are good at guiding the brain towards constructive thinking imo
If it’s not safe for you to walk around the block (especially at night), then maybe pace around in your kitchen! Personally, I live in a gated apartment complex, so that helps if I want to walk at night - and if you’re in a gated community that feels safe, then I would recommend staying inside your gated community if you do walk outside! And make sure that you always have your phone / keys!! ♥
And if you can’t run or walk when anxiety hits (i.e., at work), then try stimulating movement by doing leg movements!
P.S. - If you can’t walk for any reason (maybe you’re in the hospital, or your legs are broken / paralyzed), but you can still move your upper body - you can try appeasing the “fight” response instead by punching a pillow to release the anxious energy! :) ♥
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