#mustafar divorce
My
starlight in a bottle boy,
burning up from the inside.
My beloved supernova.
Finally come to end it all?
Finally going to let us rest?
Solar flare,
don’t you dare
burn
our house
down.
Time can only
heal the entry wound of the
poison barb
you left inside me:
rotting love,
festering longing -
purple toxin living in my
blood.
And he saved you from
disaster and ruin,
your beautiful fire-starting boy.
The flames he lets lick your
salt-soaked remains
don’t change that.
Many times,
he saved you.
Many times.
(It only takes once for
destruction
to lay waste.)
(It only takes
forever for a
heart to break.)
One word,
never uttered,
forever lingering in my mouth
and
burning eyes.
One word I wished I had the courage to say:
Stay.
I opened my arms to comfort you
and
you went for my throat with a snarl.
Monsters need love, too
(but only on their terms).
I’m so tired of this
heartache
wrapped in
barb wired love.
Darling,
you are an
axe hammer
and, I -
a sheathed blade.
Do not forget:
we are both weapons.
(I know how to cut, too.)
And I am begging:
Don’t do this to him
(Don’t do this to yourself).
His end is not just his own.
Land of two setting suns.
Drink my daydreams of
us
from my
shivering
belly button.
Let me clasp my hands around you and
hold your
venomous maw
against my womb.
Beloved betrayer.
Erstwhile naysayer.
Dearest love,
I am
devoted
to you and your
damnation.
That poison from that cracked rock -
I drank it, too.
I drank it, too.
You cannot save a dying star
(no matter how much you love it).
Lonely boy turns into lonely man -
lonely boy with ever-empty hands.
Lonely boy ripped from his mother -
lonely boy who never believed love from another.
Lonely boy who was so sweet -
lonely boy, now picking blood from his teeth.
Lonely boy, let reason wake.
Lonely boy, let go of your heartbreak.
Lonely boy, you’re all I hold dear.
Lonely boy, you’re all that I fear.
Lonely boy, enshrouded with sorrow -
lonely boy, don’t leave me tomorrow.
Lonely boy, please don’t go.
Lonely boy, I love you so.
Lonely boy, please trust my love.
Lonely boy, aren’t I enough?
An open circle
of
salt and fire -
never complete.
I told the truth
and
broke both our hearts.
I told the truth
and
you called me a liar.
