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I went to a high school where I was one of three black kids in my whole graduating class. On a regular basis, I experienced antiblack (+ antiqueer) violence in the hallways, in the bathroom, in the lunchroom, and sometimes even in my “safe space” that was theater.
I still hear the matronizing misogynoir of the white teachers who instructed me to cover myself up with jackets because my budding hips and breasts made my clothes “too tight” which “violated the dress code.”
I still feel the hands that grabbed at my hair, poked, touched, and reduced my black body to a spectacle of curiosity and cruelty.
I still catch a certain tightness in my throat when I remember the upperclassmen who asked if I had a “thug side” or why I didn’t talk ghetto “like other black girls.”
Though I did not know who Pauli Murray, Audre Lorde, James Baldwin, or bell hooks were at the time, my parents, aunties, godmothers, and elders taught me the resistance work of Sidney Poitier, the ancestral healing of Maya Angelou, the self-determination of Malcolm X, and the love language of Martin Luther King Jr.
In this time of heightened segregationist violence, antiqueer legislation, and imperialist politics and proxy wars, we are all in search of moving castles that bring us peace and a sense of belonging. While the waterways of decolonization are filled with growing pains, sorrow, healing, and wrath there are also rivers that overflow with a love that celebrates our existence.
There is no perfect solution to combating violence in any form, but in an ecosystem of white supremacy, we would be fools to reduce Protect Black Women to a battle cry and not recognize it as a declaration of love.
Untill the energy and support we give to Black men (those we are related to, and otherwise) is privately/ publically reciprocated, I would encourage us to take a back seat. I appreciate that it is in our nature to go out of our way to love, protect and defend our men, (often to our own detriment) but we need to stop putting their needs and wants before our own!
I want to remind you of the racial abuse Black women like Diane Abbott endures on a regular basis. Do Black men collectively run to her defence, support her when she is being trolled, or send her love when she is being hated on by racist bandits? Hmm, no they don’t.
Furthermore, when you ask them why they don’t, many Black men will say “I don’t like politics” or “I’m not interested in supporting the Labour party” oh let’s not forget their favourite excuse “ I don’t like her wig”. Well newsflash, the vast majority of us don’t like football/support the England football team, nor do we find the black footballers hairstyles aesthetically appealing. Yet, we still come out in solidarity of these men whenever they’re being attacked.
Ladies, we need to wise up, as we’re shown on a daily basis that our experiences, feelings and thoughts are not as important or valid in this white supremacist society, and worse still, in our own community. So, let’s proritise ourselves because no one else will. #UncomfortableTruth #DefendBlackWomanhood ❤️♀️
Will Smith smacked Chris Rock. Smacked. I’ve seen news media say he punched Chris Rock. I’ve seen news media say Chris Rock was decked. I’ve seen it characterized as a whole ass brawl on stage. Chris Rock was smacked. But because it was a black man doing the slapping they’re trying to hype this up to be more than what it was. As if Will Smith did the most violent thing on TV ever, because black men are always painted as the most inherently violent. Fuck that. I think the most violent thing I’ve seen at the Oscars is Seth Macfarlane sexualizing a 9-year old Quvenzhane Wallis on national television and no one batted an eye. Don’t let them hem this black man up over some bullshit. Over a slap.
Ugh, I remember that. He deserved to get knocked out for that shit.
I’ve talked a lot about Megan thee Stallion and the harm and trauma she’s endured because I care about HER. The safety, love, care and uplifting of Black women are my priorities. I do not give a damn about anything the man that shot her is doing. I will not mention his name. I will not listen to his music. Nothing. Ignore him. It can be upsetting and triggering to see an abuser continue to try to inflict harm so I know it can be instinctual to discuss his shenanigans. Instead of engaging him (because he clearly wants attention) uplift Meg, stream her music.
It’s the fact that he’s implying he’s intelligent that’s really doing me in. But this way of thinking, misogynistic bullshit. Men like this.. gross. Why are men blaming women instead of checking men. And why are all the “good men” letting all of us women do all this fighting by ourselves. You’ll reblog something calling for the protecting of Black women and then be silent and do NOTHING. Step up or shut the fuck up. Make me siiiccckkkk
I had fun with this one. See how FOOLISH you look when you do this bullshit. You look very very silly. Let this be a lesson cuz this is the last person I’m engaging this way.
The erasure of how Black women experience state violence is not sitting right with me. Black women are killed by police. Black women die in police custody. Black women are sexually assaulted by police. When BW defend themselves they are arrested instead of their abuser suffering any consequences. Police often inflict more harm on victims of IPV. Let’s be clear: Megan was protecting herself by not mentioning the gun. Don’t center that man in this.
Even in her “sparing” him she was protecting herself because now after telling her truth ppl are demonizing her and calling her snitch (which lets me know ppl get their street knowledge from twitter and cartoons cuz that’s not what snitching is). But when she wasn’t speaking on it she was too happy so she must be lying. Just say you hate Black women and GO
Megan Thee Stallion confirmed that Tory Lanez shot her. We already knew!! We believed her. Megan also said that Tory and his team spread all those rumors to the blogs. Anyone that defended him you look FOOLISH. If ya made jokes you’re not seeing heaven and neither is he. And before you start, she said she decided to be done with him and get out of the car and he shot her as she was walking away. No reason.
Once again people forcing her to relive her trauma. She even posted her wounds yesterday. Why don’t you believe Black women?? Quickly!
I see a lot of ppl saying she even protected him and yes that’s true, but Black women are killed by police too. Megan was very aware that she, her shooter and the two other people as Black people were in danger. Police often inflict even further harm on DV victims and as women we are also very aware of this in our interactions with police. It’s all so infuriating. Black women, we have to keep us safe. We all we got.
Megan Thee Stallion confirmed that Tory Lanez shot her. We already knew!! We believed her. Megan also said that Tory and his team spread all those rumors to the blogs. Anyone that defended him you look FOOLISH. If ya made jokes you’re not seeing heaven and neither is he. And before you start, she said she decided to be done with him and get out of the car and he shot her as she was walking away. No reason.
Once again people forcing her to relive her trauma. She even posted her wounds yesterday. Why don’t you believe Black women?? Quickly!
Black women deserve to be taken care of vs always being the caretakers.
Read that again.
Love the support behind this post!
This is a post about emotional and physical safety. There are different forms of caretaking - emotional, physical, etc. This isn’t a post about literally being taken care of, however, there’s nothing wrong if this post resignated with you in that way. In our culture, Black women have always been the matriarchs, and with that, our health, safety, and needs fall to the side. Many have seen this with their grandmothers, mothers, sisters, themselves, etc. It is the norm for many.
Black women are also seen as being “strong” as if we don’t feel pain so we don’t need to be tended to… we’ve seen our physical and mental safety be disregarded especially in the healthcare system and we’ve been gaslighted even in our own community.
This post is a reminder that you deserve to have your emotional and physical well-being cared for, this shouldn’t be one-sided.
In order to see change, mindsets that have been held for a long time need to change and awareness needs to be brought. Tags like #blackgirlsmatter and #supportblackwomen exist for a reason.
