#thouhgts

After almost 26 years, I came to realise how much affected can someone be due to the absence of a parent. I find myself feeling that I’m never enough, not worthy of love because she left me alone as a kid. No matter how much I love someone, or how much that person loves me, I’m always afraid that they’ll leave, just like she did. Suddenly.Without any explanation.

Nights in a row I cried myself to sleep, wanting her to be there, but never was, always hearing promises that were never kept.

I wanted you there. But the fact you never was, left me broken forever, questioning my own worth, thinking about what did I do, where did I go wrong… What the fuck did I do to you to leave me alone, growing up by myself craving for love and affection that was never given to me. The fuck did I do to deserve to grow up like this-to become an adult having abandon issues?

No you don’t have to match my energy cause I’m the negative one, dw

I’m afraid to go back to school, I’m afraid to stay home

Ma se fossimo io e te?

Keeping myself distracted