Bitty starting college at 18 and being in the class of 2017 (meaning he’ll graduate when he’s 22) means HE WAS 15 AT THE TIME OF SOUTHERN JUNIOR REGIONALS 2010. Which means it was either spring of his freshman year or fall of his sophomore year of high school.
The closet incident was in 7th grade. Which means Bitty kept skating- FOR YEARS- after it happened. It wasn’t what made him give up figure skating like we’ve all been head-canoning for so long. He was locked in the closet and he kept skating anyway. Yeah Bitty!!
(Also, can someone verify for me that the move IS the reason he quit? I know everyone agrees on that but I thought we agreed on the move and quitting happening soonish after the closet incident and WOW.)
And also- Bitty went from figure skating championships at age 15 to being CAPTAIN of the hockey team his junior and senior years. He would have been about 16.5 when the season started his junior year. What. HOW IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE. Yes, he seems to imply that being captain might not have been a big deal because it was a “small town” team but we know his tape was incredible enough to get a full athletic scholarship to a Division I school (we know it’s Division I because they play Yale).
If he didn’t start playing hockey until after he quit figure skating (which seems super likely but please confirm if you can) even if he quit right after the Southern Junior Regionals championship then that means he reached Division I levels in 3 years. Here we were all thinking he started playing in 8th grade after the closet incident but… appparently not??? Turns out he’s an even more incredible skater/learner/athlete than we all realized (ya hear that, Coach??). @ngoziu , what are you even doing to us? Does Bitty have super powers?? Is he actually a secret future member of the superhero comic you’ve been sketching out recently? Was Superhero Bitty your plan all along???
My mind, it is blown. And this fic I was working on needs to be, like, completely re-written because I’m determined to make it as canon-compliant as possible.
Please let me know if there’s more to this that I’m missing!! And cite your sources, please! I feel like Tango now. I have…. so many questions.
So I did this thing in September of 2018 and it somehow broke 1,000 notes(!!!) and I’ve seen some posts recently about timelines and Bitty’s background so I thought I’d share what I managed to put together.
Don’t Blame Yourself or Feel Pressured… For Staying in the Closet to Feel Safe
Going against the norms of society is not an easy thing to do. Society itself pressures you to be Normal and fit in when they see your body and relate with you. This gender binary, only men and women, is deeply ingrained in our society, taught at a young age. Men wear men’s clothes and Women wear women’s clothes. The clothes should not be mixed, or men wearing women’s clothes or women wearing men’s clothes. Hair styles, jewelry and makeup are part of that social conditioning for normality of gender conformity.
Even those who find they are not heterosexual, feel they are gay may find resistance, who you’re attracted to. So trying to stay safe and not reveal yourself, step outside the box of society norms, or expectations, is often preferred.
How you feel is valid. Just because others close to you don’t relate does not invalidate your feelings. The differences in your gender identity, who you wish to project as, or who you’re attracted to is not for others to judge you by. You should be able to take the time to discover who you are without prejudice by those around you or society at large. But it’s not a perfect world. We must be careful who to trust with your feelings.
I personally wish we could all wear the clothes, grow our hair, wear the jewelry, or wear makeup at any age, that we prefer and project who we feel we are without ridicule. Those who raise us with all these fears, these beliefs, inflict some trauma, can have long lasting effects on how we walk our paths in life for decades.
We badly want to be our true selves but our past holds us back. Society then taught, helped mold our mask that has become like armor. And current society intolerance helps reinforce those fears. The desire to feel safe overrides our desire to breakout of our mask and be who we truly are. And that has more consequences and damage to untangle later in life.
So be patient with many of us from the early days, and in less tolerant places, who stayed, or stay, in the closet to feel safe. There have been great strides, many good steps forward, to be a more tolerant society and learn from its mistakes in some places. But I still remember how it was and the intolerance of those times. I do see some reversing, a step back, of our progress.
You’ll know in your heart when it is right and a time for you to make your move. Don’t be burdened by what you lost in the past and by the trauma of what you felt. Don’t let it be a burden you drag with you of what could have been. Let it all go as you slowly disassemble that mask you carefully crafted. Forgive yourself and others and look forward and not back.
Everyday brings new hope and a chance to shine your light to the world to make it a better place with your presence in it.
Embroidery Witchcraft! A little protection pillow I made with fabric I dyed myself! Stuffed with fluff, lavender, and a bay leaf. I also made a little tag, but if you are “in the forest” you could stuff that inside instead.
I think it has become apparent that over the years I have just accumulated far too many articles of clothing. With that thought in mind I think I’m going to create a sister account where I will photograph pieces from my closet that people can purchase through paypal.
I have SO much stuff everything from vintage to newer pieces I never wear. I just want these gems to go to homes where girls will actually give them the love they deserve!
I want to say something to every LGBT+ member who is in the closet:
Please do not come out if you think it is not safe enough for you.
Please do not come out because you feel the pressure to come out. No matter where the pressure comes from.
Please do not come out to LGBT-phobic people unless you noticed they change their mind. But even if they change their mind, do not come out if it is not safe.
Please do not come out to people you barely know.
Please do not come out to your school if you notice some kind of discrimination. Or your work place.
Please do not come out if you do not feel like it is right.
