#dadlife
@simmylish requests pt 2 lol
*NO REPOSTS/NO BIGOTS*
#DREAMS
Dreams are illustrations… From the book your soul is writing about you.
Marsha Norman
From one Super Dad to another Happy Fathers Day✌
I was just talking to my Dad on the phone, and brought to his attention the level of volume he displays when doing everyday, mundane things.
For example, when I stir my coffee, I do it relatively quietly, because there’s no need to cause a rukus so early in the day, but when he does it, it’s as though he’s trying to let the entire street know he’s about to enjoy another cup of Joe.
*pours sugar and cream into coffee while exhaling aggressively*
Neighbors 5 miles down the road: “Ya hear that, Norma? Is that Fred?”
CLANK, CLANK, CLANK!
“If that ain’t Fred my name ain’t Norma Jean Betty Lue Frick!”
“We gotta let the Cows in!”
*slurps even louder*
“It’s too late! It’s too late! Stay inside!”
Meanwhile, back at the house-
Dad: “Ya gotta try this Dunkin’ Donuts Roast Blend!”
Me: “Yah, I bet it’s-
Dad: *SLURRRRRRP*
Nearby horses, goats, and cows panic, breaking free from pastures all across southern Ohio.
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAUUUUUUUHHHHH!
EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH!
MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUHHHHHHH!
CNN, because they’ll report anything: “Breaking this Morning: Fritz Ross, of Rix Mills, is going in for his, what is this? Fourth cup of coffee!”
“His stirring could be heard from the West Coast, Don!”
“Remarkable.”