#incorrect harry potter quotes

Bouncer: I can’t let you guys in here.

Ron and Harry: Why?

Bouncer: A permission slip signed by Hermione is not a valid form of ID.

James: I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to be a parent. I can’t even raise a spider, how do you expect me to kill a child?

Remus: Are you sure you worded that right?

James: I fucked up

Snickers commercial: You’re not you when you’re hungry

Ron, always hungry: Who am I?

Harry: So today, Snape pointed at me with his wand

James:And?

Harry: He said, “There is an idiot at the end of this wand”

Lily: He called you an idiot?!

Harry: Well, I got detention for asking “Which end?”

James: *sobbing* That’s my son