I wonder

how people hold so many unsent letters deep inside them,

and how many of them

the moon comforted at nights.

Flowing thoughts : you knew I missed you Bombay, didn’t you? (part II)

.

But It has been a month now, since life seems to be on pause. Days and week go on, and we have lost the sense of time. From laziness to anger, frustration and solitude, it has been a month now, since we all are stuck, encaged like birds. Encaged at home, in a room, in some thoughts and in our minds. We all are sitting calm like bombs, patiently waiting to taste life again. A month now, we are asked to stay away from each other, for the sake of the humanity. I feel split between my feelings. Sometimes I want to be left alone, sometimes I crave for human interaction. I feel caught by some nostalgia and reverie.

We all, here, care and worry for our loved ones. We pour out our hearts, sometimes. We make plans for the moment our wings won’t be clipped anymore. When we would enjoy the tiniest things we never thought we would miss. We do realise that we took so many things for granted. Probably, we will apprieciate things differently, value people’s company more, probably.

We tend to learn again to enjoy the simpliest things we are allowed to and that surround us. Far from the hustle and bustle. Old books smells, that breeze in your hair while walking to the grocery, the music - the companion to your solitude, that has been a remedy to your eventual loneliness. Don’t you enjoy, through that window, seeing the sun going down letting the moon and stars looking upon us at night. Don’t you find some peace to your restlessness?

Ph : Shuvangi S.C

Flowing thoughts : you knew I missed you Bombay, didn’t you? (Part I)

I carried my stubborness and some wishes in my bag, on my way back to Bombay. Some places I wanted to go back to, memories I wanted to relive. Some faces I wanted to see again, some laughers I wanted to hear once more. Eager to explore around, curious about the new souls that will cross my path.

By the time I landed, I already had that feeling, as usual, the feeling of being Home. From shopping bindis and jhumke, to the walks and sunsets at Juhu, the conversations with the aunties and the drives with that one. The horns of the rikshaws in the traffic jam, the smell of the food stalls, the carefree crowd and the kids playing in the streets. And with that smile, on my face, witnessing the scene. Nevertheless, you knew I missed you Bombay, didn’t you?

Bombay | April 20’

Ig : @miraakle_

there is

that feeling of heaviness,

like drowing in a river of frustration.

but at some point,

right now,

doesn’t life seems to be on pause.

far from the hustle and bustle,

finding in old books smell, the little walks you are allowed to have, seeing birds flying out in the sky, in that sunray kissing the face and the moon giving us company at night,

some peace to your restlessness?

People become careless

When they get to know

You are ready to give the world to them

the sky was watching,

and the moon listening to her.

they knew

she likes to disappear often.

though they knew,

she can not escape them

and actually finds comfort in their company.

Ajeeb sa dar beth jata hai aqsar

Humare maan main

Lekin socho tho

In sabh baato ke liye

Waqt kam hai

Aur zindagi bhi bohot choti

How often do you catch yourself digging up the past.

Thinking about how, at some stage of your life, 

someone can hold such an importance to you, 

being so close to them. 

You share such an intimacy, 

sharing your thoughts, 

ambitions and fears, feelings. 

Your life. 

And since it is just a matter of time, 

things fade away, 

everything is different 

and won’t be the same anymore. 

You just get stuck in that time. 

You hold on it, 

just for the sake of what it was, 

lying to yourself.

You just swim in that ocean of memories, 

in what is now, 

some toxic water. 

Paris, october 2020 | @miraakle_

I remember, few days back, that smell of food hitting my sense, reminding me a specific restaurant we use to go with my mom back home. I then remembered, those other places we use to go with my friends, those moments. Then I felt missing all this, and again, remembered, that other feeling of emptiness that hunts me when I am in Paris. I have been thinking, since time is given to us, about it. How, back there, I will feel a hole again, the feeling of not belonging, of not being at the right place.

Thinking of what actually “Home” means. I heard sometimes, someone can provide you that feeling, just some place. Is it where you were born and live, where you have your routine. Is it where your loved ones are. I feel, home is here for me. It is familiar. Not being a total stranger to that land and these souls. My heart probably recognized it as Home even before having spent much time here. It is just where I feel whole, and complete. Home is just that.

What is happening to that world

and its people,

it just feels like

the pandora’s box got opened,

and all the world’s ills are spread out.

it feels like people got contaminated by fear and hatred.

what is the cure,

where is the light?

Montserrat, Spain. Jan 2020 | @miraakle_

Our own path, our own time, our unique and very own life.

You know, often people won’t understand you, at some points even your very closed ones.

They can’t, or may be they just don’t try or really want to. Yet again and again, so many efforts, and so many explanations don’t appear necessary to me. Why tired yourself that much in giving justifications. Anyhow you will be misunderstood by the one who are stuck in their perspective of things. Who you are, what you think, what you want to do, where you want to be. And that question, why. Well, what if I ask you your own question, why so ?

Many times we get to be compared to someone else or to the path they followed, not with a bad intention but it is still done when we have taken a different road. But we all have our own path, our own time, our own leads In life. We are all so unique that there’s nothing to compare.

I guess, they can’t understand the why and how, sometimes because you don’t know the answer. It’s just something leading you from the deep inside of yourself. And you can just follow it and make happen what you want, try to at least. I guess you seem to be stupid or selfish, arrogant or just careless, But isn’t it good enough to cherish what you have, and work toward what you chase.