#not really pro just using tags
Ugh I ate 1066 calories so far.
I’m losing control.. I’m stressing a lot over college and food that I just wanna stuff my face.
I really hate myself..
This will be it for today
Okay but actually being on tumblr is very triggering and I do this intentionally to trigger myself lmao.
My limit was 800 calories and at the end of scrolling here I planned the rest of the day till it only became 470 calories lol and you tell me this site ain’t promoting anything.
We are just here triggering ourselves intentionally whether we like it or not..
Hahahahaha-
What did I get from my eating disorder, you ask?
Acute cholecystitis.
On the bright side, I’m not allowed to eat greasy food/ high carbs food/ anything that would upset my stomach.
I’m still crying.
Please be careful guys, you can get the same thing with rapid weight loss and low calories diet..
I honestly just feel like binging today. I feel stressed from uni, I didn’t sleep and I’m so tired and exhausted and thinking about food and calories is just making it harder to me at this point.
I had 300 calories for breakfast and I still want to eat more. I never even have breakfast. I’m drinking tea to avoid these urges.. I planned the rest of the day and it came around 1000 calories so I’ll see what I can do about it. I want to eat 1200 but I’m sure I will gain from it.
I’m just so tired, I want to binge..
Omg.. I’m still losing? Idk what’s happening to my body but thank you.
Hit my second goal weight.
Third one here I come!
Got my period .-. Nice I’ll just want to eat more, gain/maintain and feel sad all the time now
Goal this month:
Become 140-142 lbs at the end of it
Buy a league of legend skin when I reach 145
That’s it.. I don’t have many goals and I don’t wanna put unrealistic goals and feel bad about myself later on.
Lol I only became 145 after like 6 months
But at least doing it healthily.. kinda
My highest : 107kg/236
My lowest (4/July/2020) : 67.9kg/149.7
I’ve been struggling for so long and only now I can see some actual results..
I’m kinda happy with my body today
Goal this month:
Become 140-142 lbs at the end of it
Buy a league of legend skin when I reach 145
That’s it.. I don’t have many goals and I don’t wanna put unrealistic goals and feel bad about myself later on.
Never thought I’d say this.. but oh my God I’m under 150!!! Just 4.7 lbs till my next goal weight I seriously CANNOT believe it!!
I’m down to 69.3 kg today so only 0.5 until I’m in my pre binge weight.. did go to the bathroom twice already cause of the laxative tea so I have high hopes for tomorrow x.x
Also learnt how to make a sweet 35 cals coffee so I’ll be drinking that all the time since it really decreases my appetite and very low in cals like daamn I’m in love (lowkey can make it 20 calories too so that’s something)
Guess who’s crying at 3am cause they realized they can’t enjoy anything anymore cause all they think about is their body and food
Yes, this bitch
HAHAHAHA guess who binged tho lmao
Ate around 2k calories and burnt like 500 but I’m pretty sure I’ll eat more later if I didn’t get the gallbladder attack from overeating idk
And just when I reached my lowest weight of 68.8 kg
Like fuck.
I promised my friend before he goes to the battalion that I will eat 800-1000 calories because he won’t be able to talk to me through this as he won’t have his phone there and he will return in like 5 days.
It’s the third day and I’m failing and idk if I should be happy that I lost my appetite or sad I’m breaking our promise.
Anyhow my intake today is 430 calories.. lol
Drinking diet cokes or anything with sweetener does break the fast even if it’s zero calories, why? Because the body will be stimulated to release insulin cause it can’t differentiate between zero cal sweetener and regular sugar..
That will slow the metabolism and the fat burn.
But still, i can’t fast without it rip
Tmi but I finally pooped after 6-7 days.
Had to drink laxative tea and matcha tea for this to work and it’s 4am and I’m having the cramps killing my stomach.
THIS BETTER MAKE ME LOSE THE EXTRA WEIGHT STUCK TO MY BODY!
I keep feeling hungry and wanting to eat and tired.
But honestly this is my second cup of coffee and the cravings are less and I have slightly more energy.
I’ll be a coffee whore >.>
Hey guys I made a new blog called NokiaWrites, where i write fanfics instead of eating, please request stories so I have a reason not to eat
guys im planning on becoming emancipated but im so scared, it feels like everything around me is collapsing. im trying to escape an abusive home but i feel bad for wanting to leave my abuser, even after years of manipulation.
