xxihavenolifexx:

Jin may as well be the CEO of Bighit now. The dude literally gives no fucks anymore.

Bang PD who? I only know Kim Seokjin, CEO of Bighit Ent.

correct-bangtannies:

Seokjin: Have you ever read something so filthy that you feel like you need to go to church and stay there for for a whole year?

Jimin: Send it to me

Namjoon: I lead a team of 6 fully functional idols.

Bang PD: Well clearly then you have some idols I don’t know of.

Namjoon: What are you doing?

Yoongi: I’m making breakfast.

Namjoon: It’s 4pm.

Jin: He’s up early today.

<Pre Debut>

Namjoon: You can only address me as Rap Monster or Leader.

Hobi *walking into the room*: Morning bestie!!

The rest of BTS:

Namjoon:

Namjoon: Good morning, Hoseok.

Namjoon: Do you take constructive criticism?

Yoongi: Look me in the eye and tell me if you think I take any type of criticism.

Namjoon: Good point.

Yoongi: I joined BTS for the same reason people visit the zoo.

Yoongi: Oh! Shh, look at that!

Yoongi: *turns to watch Jin screaming and chasing Jungkook*

Yoongi: Nature is amazing.

Hobi: What’s wrong?

Yoongi: Nothing.

Hobi: *Suspicion*

<LATER>

Hobi: Yoongi has never lied to me and I trust him with my life.

Hobi: But that shifty bastard is hiding something.

Jimin: Drugs?

Hobi: Emotions.

Jimin:*Gasp*

Jin: Why do people draw the sun with sunglasses? How is he supposed to protect his eyes from the sun if he is the sun??

Jungkook: He has to protect his eyes from your face.

Namjoon *monotone while reading*: Jin stop trying to choke Jungkook, you know he’ll win.

Jin *getting up to give an award speech*: Would like to apologize to my haters for being an *absolute* snack.

Hobi *sending a good morning text*: Good morning! Wake up my little ray of sunshine! ☀

Yoongi *texting back*: Don’t tell me what to do. *goes back to bed*

Taehyung: Horror is when a screwed up guy looks at you. Comedy is when you look at a screwed up guy.

Jungkook: What if we’re both screwed up and we look at each other?

Taehyung: Gay romance.

Taehyung & Jungkook: *look at each other*

Taehyung *to Jungkook and Jin*: Namjoon has been spending a lot of time with Jimin lately, I wonder what he’s been up to.

Jin: Why don’t we find out.

*chaotic trio, pressing their ears against Mon Studio’s door*

Jimin: Alright boss man, today is popular culture lesson #8 and I am teaching you how to clap back

Namjoon: What is clap back

Jin: I’m a mature person, I apologize when I’m wrong.

Yoongi: I’ve never heard you apologize.

Jin: I’m never wrong.

Jungkook: I’m a bottom. I can’t do this.

Jin *sobbing*: For the last time I don’t know what that means. I’m just trying to teach you to parallel park.

Seokjin: when I was born, the Gods rejoiced seeing how perfect I am

Yoongi: yeah right, you mean Satan said “Finally, competition”

Namjoon: what are you drinking?

Jungguk:coffee

Jungguk: as bitter as my soul

Namjoon: *looks into the mug*

Namjoon: Jungguk, that’s just milk

Jin: *kisses namjoon’s forehead*

Hoseok: why don’t you kiss my forehead?

Yoongi: because I don’t fucking like you

.

.

.

Yoongi: wait hobi no, come back, I didn’t mean it

Jimin: Does anyone have some baby duck pics I can look at? I’m feeling sad.

Taehyung: Do you have any specific requests?? Baby ducks in hats? Scarves? Snuggling?

Jin: Everyone has a weakness.

Jin: I, personally, am tragically talented and good looking.

Jungkook: Sorry to disappoint you, but I’d rather stare out of the window, listen to music and create fake scenarios in my head than do those worthless mortal tasks.

Yoongi: Tough shit maknae it’s your turn to do the dishes.

Namjoon: I’ve faced way more peer pressure to start animes than I have to try drugs.

Jungkook: I swear you’ll like it please just watch one episode with me hyung! It’s about volleyball and friendship!

Taehyung: What if we made being alive easy huh?? Ever thought of that??

Yoongi: Respect my elders? Absolutely! Let you disrespect me because you are my elder? Hell no.

Jin: All I did was wake you up

Yoongi *struggling*: I had thoughts in my brain, now they’re gone.

Jungkook: Paint water tastes how it smells and it’s strange.

Jin *mildly disgusted but not surprised*: How did you figure that out??

Namjoon: After all this thinking in my head my prospects of becoming insane are high.

Also Namjoon: Hmm. Sexy brain wrinkles would be good lyrics.

Jimin: I hate you with every inch of my body.

Jungkook: That’s not a lot of inches.

Jimin: That’s it-

Yoongi: You okay?

Namjoon: Yeah. You okay??

Yoongi:Yeah..

Namjoon:…

Yoongi:…

Namjoon: We’re both lying aren’t we.

Yoongi: Oh yeah 100%

Jimin: Hyung are you going to complain the entiretime??

Yoongi:Wellsomeone has to.

*Yoongi showing off his song to Namjoon*

Yoongi: See! It’s an upbeat song. Could a depressed person could make this!

Namjoon listening to Daechwita:Yes.

Namjoon: FOUR MONTHS!

Hobi: What’s he talking about??

Yoongi: Don’t worry about it.

Namjoon: THAT’S HOW LONG YOU KNOWINGLY WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT!!!

Jungkook: Hey hyung would it be stupid if Taehyung and I-

Jin:Yes.

Jungkook: But you didn-

Jin: I didn’t need to.

Jin: Oh you’re singing! Can I make a request??

Yoongi: Uh sure?

Jin:Stop.

Taehyung: People treat me like an idiot, so I’m allowed to act like an one from time to time. It’s one of the perks.

Jimin: Not everyone’s gonna think I’m pretty and that’s fine.

Jimin: They’re wrong though

Taehyung: The flavour of water is its temperature.

Jin: You’re right but I don’t like it.