The idea that because transmascs can “pass easier than anybody else” is honestly so funny when you’re actually transmasc.
If I didn’t get my hormones out of state, I wouldn’t be on hormones. Testosterone is a controlled substance, and the healthcare providers at the nearest hospital I was given were unhelpful at best, and inaccessible (three hours away, one way). I also cannot drive the hour it takes (reliably) to get from my conservative town to the nearest Planned Parenthood that offers trans healthcare. I’m lucky to spend the money (out of my pocket!) it takes to have healthcare that’s accessible and discreet. I’m one of the lucky transmascs.
But passing is much more than hormones. And hormones don’t guarantee a body that “passes.” Sometimes passing is how you dress, or walk, or talk, or carry yourself. A lot of it is luck. Different people categorize different things as “masculine” or “feminine” and it’s not universal.
No matter what you do, sometimes you’ll never be able to pass, whether by chance or choice. Transmascs three years on testosterone, with every surgery, with conventionally “male” mannerisms can still be misgendered (and they are routinely). Maybe the energy should be spent not on hating transmascs for transitioning, but spent on making sure we’re fucking safe.
Passing transmascs are not the enemy. They also aren’t the entirety of the transmasc community, so fucking let it go.
And even when you “pass”, your mannerisms can give you away. The way you sit, talk, move your head, even the way you put your hands on your hips/waist.
Like, some cis people have outright told me that I would pass if I didn’t have “pluma” (which in Spanish means being a very effeminate man, often refered as being flamboyantly gay…..which I am).
So like, do I have to change the way I fucking exist so I can pass? Uhhhh no thank you! I’m a flaming faggot!! And I’m gonna faggot around even if it means not passing, because suddenly going all “deep voiced dude who over performs masculinity” is not who I am.
Passing isn’t just a beard. And y'all would know if you were actually transmasc or deemed us acceptable to be listened to :))))
I’ve heard things like “listening to pop music will clock you” and like… if passing means that I need to get rid of my flavor or what makes me a cool guy, then I don’t want any of it.
“Passing” relies on placating to other peoples’ expectations (of manhood in this case) and they’re expectations I can’t live up to, and many of my brothers can’t, either. I have thick thighs, but so does my (100% cishet) father. Even cis men don’t fucking “pass,” but that’s ignored if it can mean that trans men can be demonized (because passing is apparently an inherently bad or awful thing if it means you’re transmasc).
the idea of transmasc people supposedly being able to pass easily is fucking hilarious.
god how i wish it were even remotely true, maybe then i wouldn’t get misgendered all the time and maybe i wouldn’t be dysphoric constantly lmao.
passing is so conditional and difficult.
My voice is why too high to pass, even after it dropping fairly significantly since December. I still get misgendered WHENEVER I leave the house despite the fact I only wear mens clothing out the house, I ALWAYS bind when I go out, I only have short hair, I don’t wear makeup, I only use mens products, I GROW FACIAL HAIR… Still get ma'amed on the daily and no amount of binding or hormones is gonna change that. I do thise things for me, not them, but still.
I can’t change HOW I talk or how my fucking facial bones are structured. In fact, my WHOLE ASS EATING DISORDER was centered around trying to lose as much fat and gain as much lean muscle as possible to look as masc as possible. I have a naturally round face, high cheekbones, big eyes. All considered very feminine. No amount of sunken cheeks or pale skin or waifness will make me pass either
And this attitude? Like EVERY trans guy passes or even gets close to passing? It really hurts younger trans people and people new to transition. It really is a driving factor in the ED of almost every transmasc I’ve spoken to. When you act like we pass, you ignore every trans person who has been killed for not passing well enough or kill themselves because they didn’t pass well enough.
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Netflix’s adaptation of Nella Larsen’s 1929 book Passing starts streaming today – and if you’re not familiar with the original book, we’ve got a primer.
“Like a decades-early precursor to a Patricia Highsmith novel, a sense of sensual glamour, frustration and foreboding pervades Larsen’s famed novella,” says critic Carole V. Bell – read her full essay here.
Over the decades of transgender MTF, male to female, persons “Passing” was and is though to be the ultimate goal, the Holy Grail. You presented as only feminine with absolutely no masculine, male, characteristics to peek out, no hint of that you ever started life as male.
But why such attention to this so called goal? What subjective standard is being used? Why do we fear so much going out in public? Why do some persons still have these fears about passing, or told they will never pass.
You don’t have to look much further than the beauty and modeling industry’s propaganda. Cisgender woman have been under this propaganda for way to long. Most models that we see in advertisements are not a realistic representations of the average female body. And yet those are the ones we hold up as the standard, who is beautiful and feminine, breast and hip size, and who is not.
Bodies change over time as you age. How you look now will be different over time. But your beauty inside, your personality, can remain a constant as you age if you work at it. Don’t worry about critics.
So my advise is just be yourself and present as beautiful person in personality. Most often you’re loved for your personality and how you treat people. Physical looks can be as fleeting as the leaf on a tree, here today and gone tomorrow. You are never going to please everyone. Even the most beautiful cisgender woman does not please everyone.
Do what you can with clothes, and makeup if you wish, to be your girl, the real you, on the outside. It is your path to decide how far you’re going to go, if you chose HRT, hormone replacement therapy, surgery options, or just a non binary blending. Just try to feel right.
It’s OK to change your mind as you keep walking your path. Being transgender does not end your path, your transition / transformation. Cisgender people get facelifts. So you have a right to do what you think best for yourself.
Feeling much better my arm is healing nicely. #Physio is working along with the #healing #hooponopono #aromatherapy #massage and #reiki thanks to @tverbroekken @laydeestardust1and @clktaylor63 for all the healing and love. Recently saddened by the passing of my hairdresser Carole. Known her for 19 years ❤.So much love and light to her. Carole was responsible for my two-toned hair colour. Her daughter Sarah has taken over and has done a splendid job as you can see in this picture. +++ +++ #gratitude #love #haircolour #haircut #hairdresser #friendship #brokenarm #gettingbetter #happy #content #lifeisshort #behappy #smile #selfpotrait #blondehair #caramel #rip #death #passing #loveandlight #thankyou (at Warwick, Warwickshire) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bvm2MH7nBd8/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=wwy47elsjl11
I’d be remiss not to also mention: Emilia Jones in CODA, Rebecca Ferguson in Dune, Regina King in The Harder They Fall, Eugénie Derouand in The Advent Calendar, Ingrid Sophie Schram in My Heart Can’t Beat Unless You Tell It To, Mia Wasikowska in Bergman Island
No April Fool’s prank—Kafka’s human bug shoves Hawthorne’s ornate roof out of the running. One slot in the quarterfinals remains. Will it go to Nella Larsen or Edith Wharton? Help choose by voting here!
LEXIE CANNES STATE OF TRANS — In this short video in ASL (American Sign Language) and English subtitles, Lexie (Courtney O’Donnell) addresses the concern of some trans people who were given the misguided notion from others that trans people must “pass” and meet other criteria to be a “real” trans person. Watch on Facebook:…
