“I have what is called High Functioning Autism, which is a terrible name for what I have because it gives the impression that I function highly… I do not.”
Anybody else who gets sensory hell when using body scrub when showering? I do. It starts to hurt and my legs are so itchy afterwards. But i can’t stop using it… my legs feel so soft afterwards. I honestly think i should stop using body scrub bc it’s sensory hell.. but at the same time i really like to touch body scrub.
It feels kinda weird and soapy and sometimes it even smell good.
That moment when you obsess over something and then the next week you find something new to obsess about. The ever changing cycles of my special interests in a nutshell. I have some many unfinished movies and tv series.. I have like 2 episodes left of the gifted: graduation.. i rly want to watch it but i’m just waaay to tired plus i have loads of other stuff to do.
I tend to “abandoned” stuff because i get a new special interest or i’m just waay to tired to obsess over that certain thing rn. Then i start to feel bad bc i just abandonded my interest like that for something else…
When you do online shopping am i the only one doesn’t really like starting on top of the page and then scrolling down to the bottom? I like starting at the bottom and then scrolling to the top. I mostly do it when i play dress up games to look for inspiration for my drawings.
But it depends on how much i have to scroll thorugh to reach the bottom of the page… Does anybody else do this?
Also merry belated christmas or happy holidays if you don’t celebrate it.
Sooo i went to my drivers test today. And umm.. i failed it. I started crying afterwards. I also had a drivers lesson before my drivers test. We also had to answer 1-3 questions which i failed two of them. I feel terrible about myself. I guess next time im going for a drivers test i’m not going to take a lesson before my actual test. I’m unable to drive for too long at a time. I can usually drive up to 30 minutes before getting really tired… I also didn’t tell the person whom i was driving with that i’m autistic. Should i tell him that next time?
Have anybody else here failed their drivers test and how did u cope with it? I feel really bad about it and i can’t get it out of my mind.
Well.. i’m to the final step in taking my drivers lisence on thursday. Bc on thursday i have my driving test. I’m really worried that i won’t pass.. bc i get overwhelmed really quickly. Any tips and tricks to be less nervous during the test that i can do? I have worked for it since may and now it’s November.. already half a year has passed.
I have a huge fear of failing…. I’m usually very hard on myself when it comes to failure.
That autistic feel…. Lol but seriously these food separators are great!
I do that too. But i don’t have food seperators like that. So i just put the food as far away from each other as possible. I don’t really like when my salad get’s mixed with other kinds of (warm) sauces on my plate, i have nothing against it if i put it on myself.
So it’s kinda fun to look at my familys plate vs mine. Bc they aren’t bothered by it at all.. and i’m like ‘no no go away!’ almost everytime my food touch each other. If the food cold has touched the warm food i usually wont eat it. So my parents usually tell me i put too much food on my plate.
Damn i’m stressed.. i have my drivers test in 9 days and there are many things which i need to memorize. On top of that i also i have a 5-6 page assigment to write in danish-history… plus i need to produce a short film in media studies for an exam. We also need to film outside of school… It all just feels so exhausting. It feels almost impossible to get through. I’m so afraid of failing my drivers test.
I also started high school and the days are really long. Thats why i haven’t posted.. i just feel way too drained of energy.
Question: How do you as an autistic person show affection? We all have our different ways of showing affection. Some of it may not be the (neurotypical) traditional way of showing love.
Answer: I occasionally hug people but not a lot. I’m not very affectionate. Sometimes getting hugged, cuddled or embraced in a hug (if that makes sense…) feels like a cage to me. Idk why but it makes me uncomfterable.
Wby you? How do you feel about affection from others? Or how do you show affection?
(I’m sorry i haven’t been updating much. But i just started in high school… and im very tired when i come home. But luckily its an all autistic class.. so we’re all autistic in that class)
- here is a short video of my artworks which i chose to exhibit. There are 7 in total! The quality is bad i know… Hehe
Soooo i got my art exhibited at a museum. It’s an exhibition where autistic people can exhibit their art. It lasts three days. I hung them up yesterday. This is a really big moment for me in my life! I reached one of my goals❤️❤️ It might only be three days.. But that doesn’t matter tho.
Soooo i took my first mental health day in a weekday.. in years. I tend to feel ashamed and guilty of myself every time i miss out on classes. But i have been so mentally down since i started school again (which was on august 13rd). It was nice to take a break from school honestly.. and it was very much needed.
I also didn’t have any absence until now. I feel mentally drained, hopeless and much more but i’m working on it. I have talked with my school psykologist, my doctor and parents about it and it will hopefully work out in the end.. i just gotta remain hopeful and not have as much anxiety about the future which scare me more than enough.
It’s okay to take days off sometimes when you need it.
P.s all the covid restrictions has been lifted in my country aka Denmark!
Sooo i went to my very first high school party today. It’s almost midnight as im writing this.. i got home earlier than i expected i would. The party started at 19:30 and should end at 24:00.. There were a lot of people, lights, loud noises, very loud music and i couldn’t hear what my friends were saying (who btw are all autistic too). It was party that were rave themed.
And i had a mental breakdown and got sensory overloaded. I started crying. Luckily my friends were there to help me :)). But honestly i also thought the party was kinda boring.. i already started considering going home at 21 because the party was so boring. It has to be the most boring party that i’ve ever attended. Even tho it was kinda boring, loud etc. i’m also kinda glad i went. I discovered something new about myself and my boundaries. I have always fantazised about high school parties… but i found out they weren’t for me.
Do you have any similar experience regarding parties like this? If so i would love to hear them.
That moment when somebody tries to touch you and looking directly into your eyes.. my dad that sometimes. He puts both hands on my shoulders and look directly into my eyes. It’s so uncomfterable.. He got mad at me yesterday for flinching away and saying “don’t touch me”. He also thought it was violently embarrasing.. Sometimes i’m okay when people touch me and sometimes i’m not. Has anybody else experiences this or something similar? I’m sorry i haven’t posted in months.. i didn’t know what to write about plus school has been draining me for the past three months.
