#idiots in love
At the Slytherin table
Draco: I wonder if Potter is gay
Pansy: I thought you pride yourself at having a good gaydar
Draco: I have no idea anymore. My gaydar gets confused with my pleasebegaydar.
Blaise: lmao me, i need someone with a good gaydar to run it on the golden trio
*(three gay sighs/three gays sigh)
Heights and Husbands
Harry potter was afraid of heights. He used to love the feeling of being above everything, sitting on top of the Dursleys’ house , the wind in his face, blowing away every worry he had. He loved it even more when he discovered quidditch, the rush of flying was indescribable, it used to thrill him every single time he rose up to the sky.
But slowly, heights became something like a taboo. The escape from privet drive, Hedwig dying, Moody dying. The astronomy tower, Dumbledore dying. The numerous escapades during the horcrux hunt on brooms (and dragons), more people dying.
He wasn’t scared of the heights, he was scared of what the heights brought, death mainly (nightmares too). No one commented on his reluctance to play quidditch after the war, or on the fact that he stopped doing his daily laps around the pitch. When he graduated, there were questions asking if he would pursue a professional quidditch career, he denied all of the offers, choosing to take a few years off with his boyfriend Draco.
His Husband Draco, he corrected himself with a contempt smirk on his face. Draco was the one beautiful thing he had with life for a long time. After the war, they depended so heavily on each other that it raised many eyebrows, but Harry didn’t carry he loved Draco with everything he had.
He turned his head over to face Draco, absorbing the absolute beauty that is his. Today was the second to last day on their honeymoon before they would go back to magical Britain and take up their promised positions as professors at Hogwarts. Today was also the day that Draco had taken up full responsibility for planning, not that he didn’t plan the days before as well, but today he insisted on it, refusing to let Harry in on any of the details.
Musing on what his husband could be up to, he absently traced his fingers along the spine of Draco’s, slowly rousing him to begin their day together.
He was excited for today, and Draco took forever to get ready.
/break\
It was around two when Draco gave his odd request of blindfolding him, he obliged, of course, the morning was spent perfectly already and he couldn’t wait to see what else Draco had planned. He happily allowed Draco to tie the blindfold around his eyes and apparate him away.
Instantly, something in him shifted, it was as if the location had triggered a warning system inside of him. The wind in his face, the unsteadiness in his footing, he was way above ground and he did not like it one bit.
He could feel his blindfold being slowly taken off as Draco came to wrap his arms around him, steadying him. His suspicions were proven to be correct as he surveyed his environment around him.
A thin bridge connected the two mountains, beneath it a beautiful blue lagoon flowed peacefully. He appreciated the view very much so, but as he saw someone plummeting to the water from the bridge, he immediately reached towards his wand to cast an arresto momentum.
Before the spell could come out of his mouth, he felt his husband’s hand on his, as he whispered into his ears, “wait.”
He obliged his husband, hoping that there wouldn’t be any death today, Draco wouldn’t let someone die…right?
Focusing on the person instead of the memories that come with the situation, he realized that there was a rope tied around their feet. Was this some weird muggle torture devise invented when he was in the wizarding world?
Why did Draco bring him here? Didn’t he know he hated heights? They were on their honeymoon for god’s sake!
And then it all clicked, it was a bungy jump. Something that he had long crossed off his bucket list once fifth year ended, his eyes zeroed in on the sign on his right, the Bloukrans Bridge, Western Cape, South Africa.
Draco loosened his grip on his arms once he realized that the statue was not going to be broken and shifted on his feet nervously.
“Why…did you bring us here?”
“The war took something away from you and replaced it with fear. Harry you love flying. Don’t give me that look I know you do. And the war took that away from you, Remember how we used to have seeker matches on the pitch and… I’m not going to force you if you don’t want to but I know you miss flying… and I know you can bring yourself to go up…and so this is me offering to do it together…conquering your childhood dreams and your teenage nightmares?”
And he was right, Draco was always right. Harry longed to fly again, he longed to fly again without the screams plaguing him. And maybe this was the way?
“I know it may seem it be sudden, the whole plunging towards the water affair… but I thought we could approach this Gryffindor-style, you know? Going all in without regard for absolutely anything? Your style?”
Harry smirked at the subtle jab at him.
“There’s even a couple packages if you’re up for it?”
Shakily, Harry took Draco’s hand and pulled him to the counter, signing them up for the highest jump of them all.
“That one Harry? Are you sure your frail heart can take that?”
“Gryffindor-style, right? Scared Malfoy-Potter?”
“You wish Potter-Malfoy!”
Draco: Potter you wanker, why cant you do anything right?
Harry: Would it kill you to be polite for once?
Draco: I not interested in being polite. Or heterosexual
Harry: FOR GODS SAKE I KNOW YOUR GAY YOU DONT HAVE TO COME OUT ONCE EVERY TWO DAYS
In the car
(Draco plugs in the aux cord and I’m Coming Out by Diana Ross plays)
draco:
harry: … are you … you know…
draco: …are you…?
(harry’s hand slowly slipping towards draco’s)
harry: …yea
(camera zooms in on draco’s disaster gay face)
nobody:
draco: you ever had a great day and suddenly your parents say something totally uncalled for and ruins your day?
(everyone else nodding)
harry: honestly cant relate
Ron: *falls of the stairs and hits his head, bleeding
Hermione: Quick call 911
Harry: What’s their number?
Hermione:
Ron: i- are you for real?
Draco: No, that’s valid
Blaise: A five letter word for people who are unintelligent
Draco: Harry
Harry: Draco
Blaise: Sometimes I question my choices in life
The Newlywed game
Hermione: Next question, when did Draco come out as gay to all of us?
Harry: *internally sweating* shitshitshitshit
Draco: are u kidding me that should be the happiest day of your life
Too Much Pride To be Together by whyisislikethat
Oi! Potter! I wonder who’s going to go to the Yule ball with you, with that hair of yours. Must be someone really desperate, the worst of the worst.” Hearing that the young saviour swiftly turned on his heels to face the speaker, all the while rolling his eyes.
- hi guys i just finished my first fic on ao3 and would greatly appreciate of yall could check it out
- also im changed my @ from drarryismysoul to whyisislikethat so fyi
Harry: Draco, we need to talk
Draco: Really? What’s wrong Harry?
Harry: I just got a call from Teddy’s school, he’s being teaching the kids to say ‘shit’
Draco: Oh that wasn’t me, I say 'fuck’
Sharing one braincell be like
(spotted again, add to collection)
Steve, flirting: You have beautiful eyes.
Bucky: Thanks, I need them to see.
Revenge (warning for PDA)
Hello I’m back! Idk what was going on in my head but it is very hikaaki <3
Hey folks, it’s finally here!
My #REED900 #DBH comics, where Nines gets very creative, and Gavin does some detective work. Enjoy! ❤️
Translation to English: Leona
Proofread: sunkiller44
oh to be the idiot in denial who can’t resist falling in love with the same paranoid idiot who can’t refuse, as you both parade as different people, over and over and over again,
Post link
i’m hot, gay and mentally ill what more do you want from me?
NOW COMPLETE
Wanting, Not Needing
Kaz finished the rest of his tea, placing the empty cup back on his desk. He’d been looking at the same paperwork for the past hour, it seemed, never getting any further with it.
He sighed and rolled up his shirtsleeves, exposing the black ink of the crow and cup on his forearm. It was hot and stuffy in his room, but he knew if he opened the window and let the noise from below invade the room, he may as well give up on work completely.
He was still too warm, could feel the stickiness of sweat starting to collect on the back of his neck. The glands on his wrists were itching, and he pulled off his gloves, idly scratching at one of them.
It took him a moment to realise what he was doing.
To realise what it meant.
Post link
In a world where the next world-ending catastrophe is not waiting just around the corner for our favorite group of Magicians, most of the excitement is to had by guessing when Eliot and Quentin will finally realize that they are in a relationship.
Julia: “Okay, they just went out on a date. Which means I win because I picked July and that’s closer than any of you.”
Alice: “No, sorry. Q just wants to go to that library in Manhattan, and Eliot tagged along because he said he liked the coffee from one of the pastry shops near there. That doesn’t count as a date. It’s gonna happen at the Halloween party this year, so my October is going to win the pot.”
Josh: “Are we sure that them cuddling and falling asleep together on the couch while watching that rom-com last week doesn’t count? Because that would have been totally my win.”
Margo: “You are all wrong. It’s going to happen on Christmas. There will be mistletoe everywhere. Sooner or later one of them is gonna get trapped under one of those with someone else, and then the other one is gonna be jealous and make some kind of public claim. They are both idiots, and that’s the kind of thing that has to happen for them to stop being idiots. So it will be December and the pot will be mine.”
Kady: “I still think you are all cheating me out of my win. Quentin called Eliot ‘Honey’ in May. Eliot handed him a glass of wine and Q said ‘Thanks, Honey.’ And then they were making heart-eyes at each other for like a minute. I won.”
Margo: “That didn’t count. The use of petnames is not conclusive evidence of them tuning into the program and acknowledging that they are a couple.”
Penny: “… Why the hell am I friends with you people?”
Kevin: *running towards Aaron with open arms*
Aaron: *moves out of the way*
Kevin: Hey, why’d you move?!
Aaron: I thought you were going to attack me
Kevin: I was going to hug you!
Aaron: Why would you hug me?
Kevin : WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?
