HAPPY BIRTHDAY, STEVE!!

Steve: Did you just flirt with me?

Bucky: Have been since the Great Depression but thanks for noticing.

Bruce: This coffee is very hot.

Clint:Yes.

Natasha: So you wouldn’t pour it on your body.

Clint:Correct.

Steve: So you wouldn’t pour it down your thro-

Clint, already drinking it: Oh shit that ouches!

Natasha: I’m a woman of action. You have to act first and learn to apologize later, like I do.

Steve: You never apologize.

Natasha: Well, I would if I had ever been wrong.

Steve, walking into the room with a signage around his neck saying ‘Good things’ :

Tony, following after Steve with a similar sign except his says 'Small Packages’:

Peter, packing his bags: I hate this household

Bucky: you know, Peter, maybe it’s just the concussion talking… but any way you choose to live your life is okay with me.

Peter:huh?

Steve: [whispers] he thinks we’re gay.

Tony: No one is judging you. It’s understandable. Loki is strong and witty, sorta slender but well-muscled. Also, those cheekbones…

Steve: I’m not in love with Loki, but I’m starting to think you might be.

Steve: You two seem kind of out of it today. What did you have for breakfast?

Loki: Don’t be silly, what I ate this morning has nothing to do with my current state.

Steve: Tony, what was your breakfast?

Tony: M&M cereal.

Steve: I didn’t know M&M make cereal.

Tony: They don’t. It’s just M&M’s in a bowl with milk.

Tony: I’m a technological genius!

Steve: You duct-taped a gun to a Roomba.

Tony: Meet the Boomba.

Loki: A knife would’ve been more effective. One that isn’t easily noticeable, so people don’t see it, right up until the Roomba stabs them in the ankle!

Tony: *gasp* You’re right!

Steve: You two are a hazard to society.

Tony & Loki:Thanks.