In the Center of Everything

Request: Hello love! Can you write with something like rebel and force sensetive reader and Kylo kidnaps her but he doesn’t want rebels to come so he takes her to Naboo instead? They spend time there and reader is nice person so they slowly start falling for each other? I was thinking like kinda fairytale setup like dresses he gives her, fancy meals etc. Picnic next to the waterfalls like Anakin and padme would be a nice bonus for @imaginesyes​

Words: 3,260

Reading Time: 14 min

Category: Fluff

Warnings: None

Check my Masterlist for more.

In the Center of Everything

There’s something sweet and almost kind

But he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined

It has been some time since I have been, how to put it… In captivity on this planet? It all started a long time ago, for several years I had done everything possible to try to go unnoticed by the war that was happening everywhere, I knew perfectly well that something in me made me different from others, and for that reason, I decided to live with a low profile, I didn´t want to attract the attention of anyone, not the separatist groups, or those who called themselves rebels and much less the First Order, at the end of the day I was sure that if someone noticed that peculiarity that I had, they wouldn’t hesitate to spread the word and eventually I would have someone behind me looking for me.

I realized that I was able to connect with the Force when I was a teenager and to be honest, at first, I was very scared, I didn’t understand what was happening or how I could do what I was doing, but with the passage of the years, I accepted that that was my nature and I couldn’t deny it, so I cultivated it as best I could.

When my parents passed away, I completely put aside the business and commercial life we ​​had and isolated myself, I built a small cabin from scratch in a quarry near our town and dedicated myself to planting what I could, slowly, I became a self-sufficient person. All this time I stayed out of the conflicts that were happening outside, never in my life did I think that I would end up in the center of everything.

One night, I still remember it perfectly, while I was meditating, I connected with a strange energy. At first, I was very scared, I couldn´t understand what was responding to me, so I immediately cut my meditation. It took a few weeks before I was encouraged to do it again.

The next time I connect with that energy, try to prolong it as long as I can. Little by little, night after night, I connected with that entity more often. I didn’t know what it was, who it was, or where in the Galaxy it was, but I felt quite comfortable and intrigued to have made such a connection. I never suspected anything, I never thought that it could be something that would hurt me, I simply felt that it was someone like me out there and that, even with my self-exile in the middle, it made me feel accompanied… Until that night arrived.

It all started like a small whisper that intensified, “Where are you?”; A pair of eyes that pierced the gloom of the space that divided us. One question only. An answer from me that I would later regret “Cantonica”.

And now he’s dear and so unsure

I wonder why I didn’t see it there before

A couple of days passed until the consequence of my actions resonated. It was a day like any other, I never thought that something out of my routine would happen. I woke up, had breakfast, and planned my day: check and maintain my herbs, fetch some water from a nearby well, take the opportunity to wash some clothes, and go quickly to town to find some supplies that I had scarce.

When I returned home, it was already beginning to get dark, the door was closed and everything in my home seemed to be in order until I entered the living room.

A shadowy black figure was sitting on my sofa, slightly lit by the fire in the fireplace, which he had surely lit while waiting for my return.

I was completely paralyzed in place, the basket in my hands fell to the ground and some of the apples that I had collected during the day rolled on the ground, reaching his feet.

The silence was sepulchral, I could see how his body curved towards the floor and slowly, one of his hands took one of the apples that was at his feet. Immediately afterward, his entire body rose from my sofa, he was a huge black mass, I couldn´t distinguish any feature in his figure, his shoulders were wide, his entire body was covered by a black cape that seemed to blend with the shadows of the stay and his face was covered by a mask.

My only reaction was to try to run away. In seconds one of his hands grabbed my arm and my back hit his chest, where he wrapped both arms around me and lifted me off the ground.

I screamed, kicked, tried my best to break his hold on my body. Little by little I ended up getting tired, my mind kept bringing a thousand scenarios: He will it kill me? What is he doing here, what does he want? Who is he? Why me? Just when I stopped fighting him, he released me, and my feet hit the ground again, I immediately turned to look at him.

“Don’t you recognize me?” A distorted metallic voice came out of him, I shook my head slightly as I took a step back. My body was tired of trying to get rid of him, my legs were shaking, a cold chill ran down my spine and the room was slowly beginning to darken.

“It was you who brought me here…” He spoke again, at that moment I understood everything, that Beast was the source of the energy with which I had connected the previous nights, what had I done? At that moment, the panic completely seized me, with one last effort, I tried to run, but with a few steps he grabbed me again “No!” I yelled as loud as I could “What are you doing here?” I tried to separate my body from his with all my might “You know perfectly what I have come for” that metallic screech resounded in my ears with peculiar annoyance.

No, no, no. I didn´t want to, I couldn´t believe it, “Please…” the tears ran down my cheeks “Please… Leave me alone…” I sobbed uncontrollably, while my body collapsed on his, rendered by the struggle “Inside you, you know that I can’t” his arms held me tighter “Please…” my cry was already a single whisper “Just sleep” he passed one of his hands in front of my face.

He lifted me in his arms, while my eyelids closed completely.

The firelight was completely extinguished.

The last I remember of that night is the sound of his footsteps, I never understood why it had happened.

And now he’s dear and so unsure

I wonder why I didn’t see it there before

When I woke up I was in a foreign place. It was a small cabin, quite minimalist in the middle of a forest, surrounded by absolutely nothing but trees, I could suspect that near where I was there was a body of water since I could hear it, a small waterfall perhaps, or a small lake.

I walked a little through that small place, I had everything I needed, clothes, food, products for my care. Even though the place was a bit cozy, I felt quite scared, I still didn´t understand what was happening, however, I found enough comfort in the fact that that black figure wasn´t with me.

I spent a few days in solitude, days that I took the opportunity to go into the surroundings of the cabin. I wanted to know if there was a nearby place where I could ask for help, but I didn’t find anything.

One afternoon, returning home, I noticed that there was something strange, the door of the cabin was open, smoke was coming out of the chimney and a small light illuminated the main room, I understood that that black figure had returned and before entering I contemplated the possibility to flee, but where? Besides, if he had been able to trace me to Cantonica, he would be more than capable of finding me in this place, so, despite my desire to do so, I entered the cabin.

He was sitting again on a sofa in front of the fire, this time I could observe him better, he wasn´t wearing his helmet, so I could see his long, black and wavy hair “Where were you?” his voice sounded very deep, very different without that mask, I didn’t know what to answer so I remained silent “I asked you a question!” he yelled and his voice echoed through all the walls “I went out to see the surroundings” I answered fearfully, with a blow he got up from his place and in a few steps he reached where I was, one of his hands held my chin and looked at me in the eyes “You will never leave this place if I don´t allow it!” at that moment panic took hold of me again, my legs were shaking and I closed my eyes and a few tears escaped. His hand left my face and I could feel him walking past me “I left food in the kitchen…” I could hear a small sigh from him “I also left you some clothes and supplies in your room” and without saying more he left the cabin slamming the door.

These types of encounters were repeated a few more times, every time he came to see me he left me supplies, dresses made with fabrics that I had never seen before, and some other gifts, such as necklaces, bracelets, and sweets. I didn’t understand what was happening. Who was this man? Why had he brought me to this place? What did he want from me?

One of those many nights that he had come to see me I decided it was time to confront him, I appreciated the details he had with me, but I couldn’t say that I was grateful, at the end of the day, this man had kidnapped me and I still didn’t know why.

“Who you are?” I asked before he went out the door again “That doesn’t matter” he answered without even turning to look at me, for a moment my blood boiled, I was tired of him appearing and disappearing without giving me explanations, without saying anything “Of course it matters!” I didn’t notice the tone of my voice, and yet he kept walking without saying anything to me “Is this all a twisted little fantasy of yours?”, he was about to reach the door when he turned his face suddenly, I could notice how his brow frowned “You´re exceeding a limit that you should not cross” he threatened me raising one of his hands and pointing one of his fingers at me, something in my stomach told me that I should stop with this confrontation, but I couldn't… “I need answers!” now it was me who was walking towards him with an outstretched hand and a finger pointing at him “I know you have brought me here because I manipulate the Force!” I yelled at him as my finger sank into his chest “But I don’t know why I’m here or why you’re doing this and…” his always stoic face, began to flood with a red color “I’m done! I will not continue with this! ” Suddenly a roar was present and all the furniture in the house went flying “You will do what I tell you!” he yelled as he paced back and forth “I’m not your toy!” Even though my body was shaking with fear and helplessness, my anger was even greater, “You can’t have me here” I threw it in his face once more “Of course I can and I will continue to do so” he turned his back on me once more and went out the door, I ran after him to reach him, but the darkness of the forest didn´t let me see him…

She glanced this way, I thought I saw

And when we touched she didn’t shudder at my paw

Once again, I was alone in that place, without knowing what to do or why, full of anger, anger, and fear…

A few weeks went by without him showing up at the cabin, so I take advantage of all those days to tidy up the house, clean, and review some of the things that he had brought. The truth is that I refused to wear several of the clothes that he had given me, as well as the jewels, so I had simply put it away without paying any more attention, but now, with many time alone, I looked closely at it and I could notice each one of it were quite exquisite.

The days continued to pass without knowing anything about him, for some strange reason, I was beginning to miss his presence, I hadn´t noticed before, but the truth is that he was quite a handsome man, although, every time this idea crossed my mind I felt quite guilty and angry at me.

The weeks became months, I began to wonder if I would see him again or if I had to accept the idea that I was stranded in that place with no one else around me. I began to have small panic attacks due to my loneliness and some nights I implored to see him again.

One morning I went for a walk to the nearby stream, indeed, it had a small waterfall, it was a comfortable place that filled me with tranquility, when I returned to the cabin, I noticed that the door was open and my heart jumped, I didn’t know if it jolts with joy or scared, but I ran inside right away.

There were a few pieces of furniture lying around, I started to feel scared. I kept going until I reached the bathroom, where I found him lying on the floor, he was injured. I immediately rushed to the ground and tried to hold him “Don’t touch me!” he growled as his hands tried to remove mine from his body “You’re bleeding!” I insisted holding his hands with mine “I don’t need your pity…” he growled again, I turned to see him, our eyes were fixed for a few seconds, I could see that he felt pain and I weighed all that we had previously experienced and I felt the need to attend to him “Let me help you…” I spoke softly “Please…” he nodded slightly and I took it for a yes, despite his pride wasn´t allowing him to say it, he wanted my help.

No it can’t be, I’ll just ignore

But then she’s never looked at me that way before

That night he slept in my bed. When I woke up the next morning, I assumed that it was likely that he was no longer in the cabin. I was so surprised to see him still asleep that a small smile spread across my face. He was a completely different person, calm. The little light that filtered in through the window finely illuminated the features of his face and my heart jumped slightly with a strangely warm, not out of fear or insecurity, so I left that room a bit confused by what I just felt.

The days went by, and he… He stayed with me in the cabin. Little by little, we began to exchange more words, although not many, he was a man who spoke little. He began to help me with the little chores of the house, although he was quite clumsy at first, he improved as the days went by. He even offered to help me with the little herb garden that I had started to build in the garden.

Slowly his laughter began to flood our meals, and his stories about his travels across the Galaxy catch me at night. I learned about things that I didn´t know existed thanks to him and my heart kept jumping every hour that I enjoyed his company.

On one occasion I asked him if he wouldn´t go away again, the only thing he answered was that there was no place out there where he belonged. At that moment I understood that the Beast that had appeared a year ago in the room of my old home no longer existed and it was in that moment that I decided that that place where we were, in the middle of nowhere and far from everything, was now the home of both, however, I still felt my doubts, what if the bond that we were beginning to have was just a product of my imagination.

New and a bit alarming

Who’d have ever thought that this could be?

One morning, after waking up next to him, I wanted to put a plan to the test: the night before I had prepared a basket with some food, my idea was to ask him to accompany me to the forest to find some berries to plant in the garden. That morning I fixed myself with one of the dresses that he had brought me during one of his first visits and that I had never worn. When he got up, I had everything ready.

"I’m going to need your help today…”, he just looked at me a little confused “Please get ready before we get late”. A few minutes later he left the room towards the kitchen where I was “Hold this” I gave him the basket, his face was full of confusion, he couldn´t understand what was happening, I walked to the door and turned to see him “What are you waiting? Let’s go!” and I smiled at him as I walked out the door.

We walked for a few minutes in the forest without saying anything until we reached the stream. Once on the shore, I spread the blanket, I approached him, took the basket, and sat on the ground, he just imitated my steps. I took out some of the bites that were in the basket and we began to eat, we never speak. When we finished, I looked back at him.

“I don’t know much about you…”, he just fixed his eyes on mine “And you don’t know much about me…” I started to take off my shoes “But we´re both… Living in this place…” the sound of the waterfall was like little sinfonie behind us “I didn’t get here of my own free will and I still don’t understand why…” I plunged my feet into the water “But I’ve grown to love this place…” I turned to look at him and a huge smile was painted on my lips “And I’ve started to take a strange affection for you, although I don’t know if I should…” and suddenly, everything changed.

The birds sang around us, the sound of the waterfall became louder, and his lips… His lips were on mine with an intensity that I had never felt. One of his hands was holding my neck, while the other was holding one of mine firmly. His caress was soft, however, somewhat desperate, but full of passion “Ben…” he whispered as a smile touched his lips and his hand caressed my cheek “My name is Ben”. At no time did his eyes leave mine and my heart burned completely “Well, Hello Ben” I went over to kiss him again “Welcome home”.

True that he’s not Prince Charming

But there’s something in him that I simply didn’t see

I leave you the list of Prompts for this season!

How does it work?

• Select 2 numbers from the list.
• Select the character you want the story about: Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, or Armitage Hux.
• Select the topic: Fluff, Smut, or Angst.
• They will be short stories of maximum 1,000 words.

Check myMasterlist for more.

______________________

100 Prompt List

1. You´re so beautiful.
2. Can I hold your hand?
3. Bite me!
4. What are you thinking?
5. Just this time.
6. Will you stay?
7. I promise I will never let anything bad happen to you.
8. All I wanted was you.
9. I don’t trust myself around you.
10. Take me back.
11. I´m just scared that one day you find someone better than me.
12. It wasn´t supposed to happen this way.
13. Please be careful, this is my first time doing this.
14. I don’t understand why you get like this.
15. It’s because I’m jealous!
16. Just relax.
17. Relax, everything will be fine.
18. I’ll be in my room in case you need me.
19. Just say it and I’ll stop.
20. Because I love you!
21. Don’t look to me to apologize.
22. How could you do this to me?
23. You will speak when I say you can.
24. Who do you think you are?
25. Please, forgive me.
26. I’m nothing without you.
27. You will do what I say!
28. You like that, right?
29. Please stop, you’re hurting me!
30. I would like to apologize, but the truth is that I do not regret it.
31. Do you think anyone knows?
32. Who do you think you are to talk to me like that!?
33. Just a little more.
34. Are you trying to turn me on?
35. Why are you looking at me like that?
36. I hate that you behave like that!
37. I’d give anything to kiss you right now.
38. Never go near him again!
39. You are just mine.
40. Can you give me a cigarette?
41. You don’t know what you are saying!
42. I will never tire of looking at you.
43. Could you teach me to do it?
44. I would like to leave it all behind!
45. You have no idea how I feel!
46. I hate you so much!
47. You’ve only manipulated me all this time!
48. It is not what you think.
49. You are reckless.
50. I would like to freeze this moment.
51. What we are doing is wrong.
52. Things shouldn’t have happened like this.
53. Everything they/he/she told you is not true.
54. Can I hold your hand?
55. Come here.
56. Why are you so nervous?
57. Don’t tell me what to do!
58. Why me?
59. I want to be with you no matter what happens.
60. I would like to try it.
61. Do not leave me.
62. Let’s just enjoy this moment.
63. It’s all your fault!
64. None of this would have happened if I had done it right.
65. Who did this to you?
66. Tell me what you want.
67. I am at your mercy.
68. You’re bleeding!
69. Let ‘me help you.
70. I am worth much more than you think!
71. I am not a trophy that you must win!
72. You are such a nasty boy/girl.
73. Open your mouth.
74. On your knees.
75. Next time I won’t be so nice.
76. Do you think you deserve it?
77. Shout my name!
78. You’re going to cum when I say so.
79. Who is your owner?
80. Beg me.
81. Not so fast, we have time.
82. Let me take care of you.
83. You will behave well.
84. Go on, don’t stop!
85. Just a little more.
86. Only for this occasion.
87. Someone can see us.
88. I wish I had never crossed paths with you!
89. Stay still for just a second.
90. You, and you fucking pride!
91. I can not continue with this!
92. What can I do to make you feel better?
93. You are so needy.
94. This moment is just for you.
95. What are you hiding from me?
96. I don’t understand why you behave like this.
97. Just shut up!
98. I don’t want to leave, but I have to.
99. And haven’t you ever thought that if I do it is because I feel something else for you!?
100. Just tell me what’s wrong.
     

Let’s play!

All this weekend I´ll be prepared to answer all your questions about Armitage HuxandKylo Ren of any kind, whether it be flufforsmut, so shot your darkest and most perverted doubts or your sweetest and most tender concerns about these two gentlemen.

I promise not to keep anything at all.

Your darling (and mistress),

Black Diamond.

Stay with me - Headcanons

Ways you and Ben Solo adjusted your  lives after the fall of the First Order

Ben Solo & Kylo Ren One Shots MASTERLIST.

Black Diamond´s Story MASTERLIST.

• Switching to the Light wasn´t an easy thing for Ben, he still goes through very bad times when the Darkness tries to call him, but he tries to hide his frustration as best he can since he knows, and feels, that he´s the only pillar that you have to stay in the Light too.
• Leaving the darkness for you was a bit more complicated, since your whole life was full of situations that fueled the anger you felt, and going so dramatically into the Light, when you had never been there before, meant completely forgetting and leaving behind the person you were.
• There are times when one of the two wakes up in the middle of the night, sweating or crying due to some nightmare, and the other will always cling to the other’s body, even after leaving the Darkness, both continue to maintain your bond through the Force, so you´re able to feel what the other feels. Both are a kind of lifeline for each other.
• At first, it was very difficult for you to move around the resistance base, since you could feel the inquisitive looks and some of the suspicious thoughts of the people around you and judged you.
• There are times when both cannot sleep and leave your tent to walk calmly and chat alone in the surroundings of the base.
• During the whole time you were together in the First Order, you got used to leading your life as a couple in an extremely private way and it´s something that even being in the Light you continue to maintain, all your activities together, such as eating, training and your free time it still, as much as possible, at the privacy of your tent.
• Regarding the displays of affection, at first you were both embarrassed that someone saw you sharing a caress, but little by little, Ben began to be affectionate with you in public, holding your hand when you walked together, hugging you from time to time and occasionally kissing you on the forehead.
• Sometimes when you try to call him, you do it by the name of Kylo; You automatically blush and apologize immediately, but secretly, and privately, you both like to hear your old names (in fact, even now in the Light, you both call each other by their Sith names while having sex and love it).
• You aren´t very sociable, however, Ben has managed to develop a good relationship with Poe, knocked down by their mutual interest for ships and engineering, while you have started a good friendship with Chewbacca. Both try to avoid Rey, although sometimes Ben helps her train and that makes you feel very jealous, and Finn avoids you completely.

Black Diamond

Guess what? It’s time for more avatars!! Check my Masterlist for more.

Black Diamond Sith Aesthetics

Check my Masterlistfor more.

Black Diamond

Guess what? It’s time for more avatars!! Check my Masterlistfor more.

Y/N: Well, this is a nice change of scenery.

Kylo: It’s a prison cell.

Y/N: I was being sarcastic.

A Poem Exposé? about Kylo Ren and a Reader or “insert” lover who is not Rey. 
Original Poem by Dylan Thomas in Bold. Italics are mine, where the “story” meets the poem. 

This is a stand alone piece, not connected in storyline to my other works. 

Do not go gentle into that good night, 

And he did not. No, rather it was a painfully slow end. His life force for another. 

Old age should burn and rave at close of day; 

You had planned to grow old together, something you had done since you were children, one half of a whole soul.

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Yours was dimming, he traded his so she could live, but your light was his light. 

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,

He must have known what this would cause, what that trade would do, something to set the universe right, but your world collapsed the moment he did. 

Because their words had forked no lightning they

Do not go gentle into that good night.

But his actions stopped them, his sacrifice helped save everyone, helped save her, but possibly unbeknownst to him, it sacrificed you too. 

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright

Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,

He was lost, for so long, unable to find the truth. He did what he thought was right, even when that deed was against all else, the only truth he knew was you. 

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

She didn’t get to watch you fall, no, you were supposed to be safe. He kept you safe, but nay that did no good, for you still fell. 

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,

One of the things you loved most about him, was that childish seeking of adventure, the one he hid from all else, part of the true form he only revealed to you. 

And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,

But he found out too late that the fight he was fighting, was not the good fight, for all the players had not revealed their hand. No, he was playing blind in a master’s game. 

Do not go gentle into that good night.

But in the end, when it really mattered he was there, not taking a particular side, he was there. Fighting the one who would destroy the galaxy. 

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight

Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,

You felt the shift just prior to his perilous end, his mother, gave herself to him and gave you the sight to see his end. 

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Oh, how you wish your message traveled faster, how it would get to him sooner. But in the end, it did not matter. For in either outcome your light would diminish. 

And you, my father, there on the sad height,

He was the end of the line now, not only his father’s by his own hand but his mother’s too. You were not fruitful, but you believed there was more time, but how wrong you were. 

Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.

But you were the one to bear the pain of feeling the other leave. You were given moments to grieve as you watched, anguish and anger, and loss, and heartbreak was what you felt. 

Do not go gentle into that good night.

And you did not, for if there were others around to witness your fall, they would have heard the screams of wretched tormented pain you felt, and the violent tears pouring down your face. As scream was the last sound, not heard. 

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

As you took your last breath, the flame of it went out.

So she dances

@adamdriverfangirl666​ asked: Fluff n° 1, please ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡

A/N: I hope you enjoy it. it’s a little something-something. It’s short and sweet.

Also- listened to Josh Groban while writing this. Low key inspired it.

Prompt:1. “How can you love a monster?”

WARNINGS: none. Fluff.

She took careful steps on the tips of her toes as she danced around the open room. Her dress was pale pink and her hair was a tasseled beautiful mess. In the moonlight, the tops of her cheeks glowed and her eyelids glittered. The room was silent but he could hear the music in her head, playing like a soft wind up music box. She smiled for no one but he felt like it was just for him.

Everything about her was graceful. He wanted nothing more than to take (y/n) into his arms but that would have meant for him to step into the light. He was not ready yet to stop watching her.

She was innocent, lost in her own little world. He could see the visions in her head. A grand ball on some planet, she the princess and he the one she’s been waiting for. They’re happy. So in love.

Kylo took a step out of the shadows. Her eyes meet his and her lips curled into a fresh smile.

“Dance with me,” she sang offering her hand.

“There’s no music.”

“There doesn’t have to be.”

He took her hand unafraid and spun her around before pulling her close. She was Petite next to him and her hands the size of a child’s in his. She followed his lead and he swayed her round the perimeter of the room. (Y/n) glided as if she was on air. They moved naturally together.

“I’m so happy you’re here.” (Y/n) sighed contently.

Kylo lowered his lips to meet hers, kissing her delicately. “What I wouldn’t give for it to be this way all the time.”

“Me too.”

“I must admit, I’m not the best version of myself without you. I’m messy, angry all the time, and have murderous thoughts. I’ve done bad things while away from you. Things you would not approve of. I saw the scavenger and she called me a monster. She’s right. It’s what I am.” He frowned. “How can you love a monster?”

She cupped his face in her hands and kissed both his cheeks. “You are not perfect and neither am I. Kylo Ren I don’t think you’re a monster. I just think you’re a creature that wants to be understood.”

Kylo lifted her into the air and spun her around. “You are the absolute love of my life and I don’t deserve you.”

“It’s not about what you deserve,” (y/n) stopped to pull him flush against her. “It’s about what you need. You need me as I need you.”

“I love you.” He leaned in halfway.

“I love you too.” She met him in the middle.

This is based of “The Rise of Skywalker”, but does not exactly follow the plot, so if that is going to offend you, stay away. In other news, this may be the best thing I have written… so here we go.

This was it, the final battle. You would either defeat general Palpatine once and for all or die trying. You had given the directions so that the resistance could follow you and start taking out the Star-Destroyers. They had called in every ally that they had and were prepared to fight.

But the real fight, the one that would ultimately determine the fate of the entire universe, that was on you. 

-no pressure-

You weaved in and out of the deserted hallways, put off by the eerie stillness. It was dark and had the force not been guiding you, you never would have found it. You came into a clearing, it appeared to be an empty stadium. And then you saw it, the throne that had plagued your nightmares.

Chanting filled the room as the once empty stadium was now filled with Siths. 

“Long have I awaited your arrival. I never wanted you dead, I wanted you here. Empress. You will take the throne as destiny demands.” Palpatine spoke ominously.

“I have not come to lead the Sith, I have come to destroy them,” you informed standing your ground.

“As a Jedi?” he all but laughed.

“Yes,” 

“No, your hatred, your anger, you want to kill me. That is what I want. If you kill me my spirit will pass into you, as all the sith live in me. You will become the empress and we will rule together. The time has come,” he announced and all the Sith bowed down. 

You stood momentarily at a loss for what to do.

“With your hatred you will strike me down and ascend,” Palpatine instructed.

“All you want me to do is to hate, but I won’t, not even you,” 

“You are weak, like your master, look where that got him,”

“He sacrificed himself to save the resistance, to save hope, and as long as hope remains you can never truly win,” you replied with strength.

Palpatine opened the ceiling to reveal the war that was going on in the sky.

“Here is your great resistance. They don’t have long, no one is coming to help them, and you are the one who led them here. So much for your so-called hope,” he sneered.

“Strike me down. Take the throne. Reign over the new empire and the fleet will be yours. Only then will you have the power to save them. Refuse and they will die,”

You felt conflicted, knowing that no matter the cost, you couldn’t give in to the darkness. You were questioning your next move, but then you felt his presence. Ben was here.

You nodded towards Palpatine, trying to buy time.

“Very good. The ritual begins!” he declared to his followers who cheered. “Now, you will strike me down and pledge yourself to the Sith. You will draw your saber,”

You did as he commanded.

“You will strike me, taking your revenge. The Jedi are dead, the Sith with be reborn,” he exclaimed, “Do it! Make the Sacrifice!”

You were scared, afraid that Ben was going to be too late. That is when he spoke to you through your connection. 

“It’s okay your not alone, just hand me the saber,”

You were filled with relief as you acting as if you were preparing to strike down Palpatine, then revealing your hand and the missing saber.

Seeing this Palpatine backed away and his guards rushed at you. You took out your second saber and began to fight them. Relief filled you as Ben joined by your side taking out the last guard. You both stared at each other for a moment so many things you both wanted to say, but this was neither the time nor place.

“Stand together, die together,” Palpatine snarled as he used his power to force you to kneel, pushing the lightsabers far away, as he tried to drain the two of you, immediately receiving a shock.

“The life source of your bond, a dyad in the force, a power like life itself, unseen for generations. And now the power of two will restore the power of the one true emperor,”

And with that, Palpatine started stealing your and Ben’s force with the two of you completely helpless to do anything about it. When he was done, both of you fell backward unconscious.

“Look what you have made,” he bellowed.

Ben woke up first, he struggled through the weakness to open his eyes. He glanced over to your unmoving form and knew what he had to do. He stood to face Palpatine, but the Emperor quickly lifted him off of the ground. 

“As I once fell, so falls the last Skywalker,” he yelled as he launched Ben off of the cliff, presumably to his death.

Palpatine then took his throne and sent electricity through the air to disable all of the resistance ships. 

In hearing the commotion you started to wake up. Your entire body ached, and while you could feel Ben’s presence, it wasn’t as strong as it should have been. You laid on your back seeing the resistance ships beginning to fail. Now, more than ever you needed hope. 

“Be with me,” you called out to the force, “be with me,” you pleaded.

And then you heard them, the voices of the Jedi who had come before you, giving you the encouragement and strength that you needed to rise. You summoned your lightsaber and stood your ground.

“Let your death be the last word in the story of the resistance,” snarled Palpatine. 

He refocused his power on you, which unbeknownst to you at the time had saved the resistance fighters.

“You are nothing. You are no match for the power in me,” he insisted.

You pushed forward with all of your strength, closing the gap between the two of you.

“I am all of the Sith,” he roared.

“And I am all of the Jedi,” you declared taking another step forward, summoning the other lightsaber. You then continued to push forward until the Emporer’s own power was too much and began destroying him. With one final push from you, his power imploded disintegrating him and taking out all of the Sith with as well as the majority of the structure. 

You managed to take another step, dropping the lightsabers before collapsing on the ground, welcoming death.

Ben, who was climbing back to the throneroom, ignoring his pain, had felt it. It was the same wave of emptiness that had hit him when each of his parents died, only now it was much stronger.

‘No, no, you can’t be dead,’ he thought as he struggled to pull himself over the side of the cliff. He looked around, the room had been completely demolished. There were no signs of life anywhere. Between the dust and the smoke it was hard for him to see anything. Despite that, his eyes found you, lying completely still eyes open. He limped over to you, tears streaming down his face. 

“You did it, Y/n you did it,” he cried as he pulled your limp form into his arms. He stared at you regretting everything he had done and all of the things he hadn’t done. He was too worried about turning you, trying to get you to join him. In all of the time you were together, he never told you that he loved you. He loved you. He hugged your lifeless, willing with everything that he had for you to be okay. And then he remembered.

When he had been struck down, right after his mom died, you had healed him. It was something that he had never seen done before, only having heard of it in legends. But if you could do it, maybe he could too.

He put his hand on your chest, closed his eyes, and focused. He was pushing out with the force, with his love, and transferring his life force to you. With everything he had and everything he was, he willed for you to come back.

That is when he felt it, your hand on top of his. He opened his eyes to meet your own.

“Y/n?” he asked softly as if you might fade away again. He was on the verge of crying again. 

You looked at him momentarily confused before smiling, “Ben,”

Before he could say anything else, you kissed him. The kiss was everything that you never knew you needed, it spoke every word that you hadn’t said. When it was over Ben smiled genuinely, before his face began to fall. 

He fell backward as you tried to reach out for him. You stared in disbelief as he was gone. Before you could even think about reviving him, he disappeared before your eyes. Leaving you alone once again.

You felt an overwhelming pain in your chest as you stared at his clothes. You forced yourself up, knowing that the entire empire was collapsing around you. Taking one more look at where he once laid, you turned away and headed towards your ship. You flew out and met the rest of the resistance as the flew back to the base. You hung back for a moment trying to compose yourself before landing.

You put on a fake smile as you passed through the cheering crowd. You watch as people reunite with their loved ones. Everyone was so happy. You saw Finn and Rose kissing, Maz giving Chewie a medal, R2 and C-3PO being reunited. Everyone had someone, except you. Your entire family was dead, and now even your chosen family was dead, Ben was dead. You continued through the crowd numbly, just trying your best to get back inside the base. That was at least til BB-8 rammed into you affectionately. You looked up and met eyes with Poe. He was the first one who seemed to really see you. He wasn’t fooled by the fake smile, he had no idea what you had to do to defeat Palpatine, but he could tell that it had shattered you. He pulled you into his arms and told you that everything would be alright. And that was the last thing you remembered.

Because it was seconds after he hugged you, that you collapsed into his arms. He hoisted you up bridal style and rushed you into the med-bay where the droids quickly started working to figure out what had happened. He waited outside your room, waiting to find out whether or not you were okay. He assumed that it was maybe over-exertion or pure exhaustion. It was also possible that you were more injured from your fight than it had originally appeared, he racked his brain to remember if there was anything off about your appearance when he’d seen you earlier. But nothing stood out.

He was pulled from his thoughts as one of the droids emerged from your room.

“There is nothing physically wrong with her. But for reasons we can’t explain, we are losing her,” the droid informed.

“She’s dying?” Poe asked in disbelief.

“We don’t know why, but her life force is failing,” the droid answered.

Poe didn’t know what to say as he entered the room. You had saved everyone, defeated the Emperor, destroyed the dark side. You deserved to be honored and thanked, but no one really knew what you did, how much you sacrificed. He decided two things as he sat beside you. One, you would not die alone. And two, he would make sure that your sacrifice was not forgotten. 

And true to his word, he was there when you took your last breath and faded from existence to become part of the force. To this day, people still theorize about what had caused your death. Some believe that it was because of your dyad connection with Ben, when he died, you died. Others believe that since all of the Sith and dark side leaders were destroyed, that the Jedi were no longer able to exist, and thus the force claimed you. Others claim that you suffered a fate similar to Ben’s grandmother Padame who died of a broken heart. No one will ever know for sure. 

Regardless of how you died, you will always be remembered as a hero. The Last Jedi. The one who killed the Emperor. 

But none of that mattered to you, you were happy now. For as you were welcomed into the force, you were reunited with old friends. First with Luke, then Leia and Han, each of whom congratulated you on your victory. Han was the first to notice that you were looking around expectantly for something, rather someone with a hint of sadness in your expression. 

“You can come out now,” he yelled smiling.

And then you saw him, joy washing over you completely. You ran to him jumping in his arms, all but tackling him. He smiled wrapping his arms tightly around you. “I love you,” you marveled.

“I love you too,” he beamed before taking your face in his hand and continuing what you had started earlier crashing his lips on your own. 

“You know, they used to tell Jedi’s that they weren’t allowed to be in love,” Anakin joked as he watched the scene unfold, “I will say this though, my grandson definitely takes after me”.

And with that, the Skywalker Saga that had started a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, had finally, once and for all, came to an end.

*Insert theme music*

The Sun and The Moon

(Kylo Ren/Ben Solo x Reader)

Episode III: The Five Mistakes of a Jedi

• Summary: “You were one of the 12 Padawans that Luke Skywalker taught. There, you met the love of your life. Your first best friend, your first lover and your first boyfriend; Ben Solo. Everything was perfect. That is, until the Jedi temple was burned by Ben Solo himself. 5 years pass since you last saw him and he isn’t the man you used to know. The Moon preferred darkness and in that darkness, Kylo Ren was born.”

Warnings: some swearing, murder and NSFW content.

The Sun and The Moon Masterlist

Ultimate Masterlist

18 years old

“Hey Y/N, wake up,” you heard a voice whisper to you. You let out a moan, snuggling deeper into your bed. “C’mon, wake up.”

Your eyes fluttered open to see Ben with the widest smile ever, holding a plate of pancakes drizzled with chocolate syrup and whipped cream. Candles with the number ‘18’ was stuck on top of the breakfast creation.

“Happy birthday my Sun,” he spoke, moving over to kiss you on your forehead. You hummed in approval. “I made you something.”

“I can see that,” you grinned, getting up from your bed to grab the delicious looking plate of pancakes. “It looks amazing.”

You begun eating, moaning everytime you have the syrup mixed in with whipped cream. Ben sat down, watching with a grin on his face. “Can you believe you are finally 18?”

You slowed down eating slightly, an uneasy look settling on your face. Ben took notice of this look and grabbed your hand. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, it’s just-“ you put the plate down, shaking your head. You then rubbed your temple before facing the love of your life. “I’m 18. You’re almost 21. You should’ve become a Jedi this year with Almec, Daario and Leirra and gone with Luke to the Resistance base. But you didn’t. Why?”

“Y/N-“

“Why?”

Ben sighed, letting go of your hand. “If we become Jedi, it means we must potentially end things with one another. And- and I don’t want that.”

“We don’t have to, we can keep everything in secret,” you told him. Ben let out a bitter laugh, getting up from his seat.

“Please, you’re telling me Luke wouldn’t know? He already knows and he won’t let us train with each other as Padawans,” he spoke, brushing his hair back. “Imagine if we were Jedi? He would banish the both of us. Shame us. Because God forbid that I, Ben Solo, am ever happy and found someone who actually loves me.”

“Ben-“

“All my life, I felt like I had to prove something to my Uncle. That I’m not like Grandfather. And everytime, he always spits on my face, trying to get rid of everyone I love. But I won’t let that happen, no, that won’t happen. Because I won’t let it,” Ben continued on. He then looked at you, seeing your eyes looking at him in confusion. “But let’s not talk about that now. Today is your birthday. And I have a surprise for you tonight.”

You let out a small laugh, still a bit taken back by his little rant. He was breathing deeply, his eyes moving around your room like he regretted the words coming out of his mouth. His eyes looked at yours, desperate to hear you say something, anything.

“I can’t wait.”

-

Ben sat patiently on his chair, nervously bouncing his knee. He had spent hours trying to arrange this; a table near the edge of the cliff, rose petals scattered across the table, a candle illuminating the environment and a gourmet meal that he had prepared himself.

It would’ve been quicker to arrange, if he had help by a friend. But he didn’t. No one liked Ben, or in his mind he thought no one did. In his mind however, that did not matter. You were all he needed.

But see, the thing is, when you rely on one person, that person becomes your whole life. Your day doesn’t start until their’s does. What you do depends on what the other person wants to do. Your thoughts, behaviour, is affected by their’s. And that concept is dangerous. Because once that person exits their life, whether by death or purpose, their own life crashes, burns. And they are left with nothing but ashes, a reminder of what was.

And then, their lives have no purpose but what the next person asks them of. That is what it means to be dependent.

And that is how Ben was. You both never noticed at that time, but he was someone who relied heavily on you. Maybe you should have realised, when you saw the way his eyes lit up the moment you walked towards him in a white, silky dress, pearls adorned on your hair.

“You look amazing,” Ben spoke breathlessly, watching how the candle accentuated your features. You smiled lovingly at him, walking over and pressing a kiss on his lips.

And then the last night you would ever spend the with him, unbeknownst to you, went on. Many laughs and kisses were shared. It was a night you would not forget. And it wasn’t because you lost your virginity to the man you love on your 18th birthday, you wished that reason was why this night was so memorable.

But that might, you had made fivemistakes.

“I’m ready,” you spoke in a quiet voice, looking at him in awe, like he was the one who created all the things in the galaxy. Ben scrunched his eyebrows in confusion, not understanding what you were hinting. “I want you to make love to me, Ben Solo.”

That was your first mistake.

Within a flash, you were pressed against the wall by Ben in your room, kissing like you haven’t seen each other in years. His hands were grabbing you wherever he could, both of you panting like starved dogs.

He picked you up before gently lying you on the bed, his lips trailing down your neck, leaving kisses along the way. You let out a breathless moan, your hand tugging at his roots. Ben then looked up, his eyes half lidded. “Are you sure?”

“More than I’ll ever be.”

And that was the night you lost your virginity. You hadn’t slept that night, too giddy with emotions that you couldn’t stop thinking how happy you were as you smiled, drawing shapes on Ben’s back. Wind quietly howled as your window was left open, stars bright in the sky.

But, as fate had willed, you had felt thirsty. Your mouth felt dry. So you quietly got up from your bed, trying not to wake up Ben. Putting on a robe, you begun walking outside to go fetch a bucket of water from the well outside.

That was your unnoticed mistake.

As you begun to attack the bucket onto the rope, you felt a buzz against your neck, feeling a presence behind you. Turning around, you were shocked to see who it was. “Almec?”

“In a flesh,” he spoke, but it sounded a bit dry, like he was wounded. You smiled at him, pulling up your robes more as you realised how you may look inappropriate right now with just a pink silk robe.

“When did you come back from the Resistance base?” You spoke, trying to make a conversation out of an awkward situation. The wind picked up, making your hair fly everywhere. Yet, you still did not hear a response from Almec. “Almec?”

“You know I loved you,” he confessed, taking a step towards you. You moved hair out of your way, looking at Almec in shock. You watched as he kept moving towards you, a broken look on his face. “I loved you. I still love you. And- and I came back to tell you that I left the Jedi. I’m no longer a Jedi. Because of you, Y/N. I want to be with you.”

“Almec-“

“But you slept with him. You slept with that little fucking bastard-“

“Almec-“

“Who fucking killed a bird when he were little and he convinced you he didn’t kill him when I saw him do it with my own eyes! I saw it Y/N! But you always want to believe him. Only him. It’s always him. It will always be him. And one day, he’s going to fuck up. But it would be too late. It will be too late for you,” he spoke, his face now mere inches away from yours. “But even then, you’ll still come running back to him. In the end, you always do.”

Tears were streaming down your face as you looked at him in anger. You looked at him with all the anger you could muster, but you didn’t say anything. You just looked at him like he had betrayed you.

That was your weakest mistake.

Because that quiet little moment, that moment of what could’ve been filled with words defending the person you love, was replaced by a kiss. A kiss you did not want, a kiss not initiated by you. A kiss you had wanted to pull away from, your sense of loyalty kicking in, but couldn’t because Almec’s arms were wrapped around you.

But it did not matter what you wanted to do. Because when someone walks by and sees, they’ll see merely two people kissing.

And that’s exactly what Ben saw. You did not see him, he made his presence known by pushing Almec away from you.

“Ben!” You screamed, as you watched him continuously punch Almec, his eyes black as night. That had taken you back. “Ben stop it! Ben please stop it!”

He did not listen as Almec’s blood splattered against his face. And he didn’t even flinch. You watch, now even more horrified. The most horrified you’ve ever been in your life. You could tell that Almec was in the verge of death. This man, a man you’d known for ages, was going to die in the hands of your lover if you did not intervene.

So you did what you had to do. You used the force against him and pushed him away. Far away from you and Almec. When you made sure he was far away, you ran towards Almec, cradling his head in your arms as he let out a groan. You looked at Ben, who looked just as horrified as you did. “Y/N-“

“Leave,” you spoke, the tone in your voice holding a strict seriousness within it. Ben stood up, gulping as he looked at you, his eyes shining like he was trying to hold back tears.

“Y/N-“

“Leave!” You screamed as you stood up, the wind picking up from the strong aura of the force that surrounded you. Ben looked at you one last time before nodding, turning to look away.

And you did not chase after him.

That was your worst mistake.

You should’ve ran after him. You should’ve been there with him at his most vulnerable state, a state where he could be manipulated by anyone and anything.

As you patched up Almec at the infirmary, not wanting anyone to find out about what had just took place, your mind was thinking about Ben. And how Almec was right about you always running back to him. But you won’t. Not this time. Not looking at Almec’s face, his barely unidentifiable face.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry,” Almec spoke, his voice coming out a whisper due to his probably broken ribs. You ignored him, moving water through the force to ice out his injuries. “I- I didn’t mean to. To cause a rift between you two. I- I just love you so much, and-“

“Okay, that’s done. Just make sure you apply a new bandaid every 6 hours after putting on disinfectant,” you instructed. Almec nodded, taking the hint. You gave him one last look before walking off to your quarters.

-

It was 4AM when you finally fell asleep. It was hard, but eventually you felt yourself drifting into oblivion.

‘You wanted to kill me!’ You heard a voice cry out. You stirred in your sleep, barely awake as you clung onto your blanket. The wind howled even stronger as your windows begun to ruttle. ‘You will pay for this!’

‘Ben, no!’ You heard another voice yell. You let out a groan, fluttering your eyes open as a full-blown headache consumed you. You got up from your bed, holding your head as you let out a cry. You felt darkness consuming your body, filling your veins.

‘Ben does not exist. He is weak, a young boy clinging on love,’ you heard Ben speak. Your hand went to your mouth as you realised what was happening. The darkness that Ben had warned you about was starting to consume him. The one moment you weren’t there for him, he had invited darkness.

‘I am Kylo Ren.’

You then heard yells from outside. Running over to your window, you let out a cry as you see the temple on fire. The crackling sound was louder than the strong gust of wind. You gulped, knowing the person who started this fire.

Your hands trembled as you grabbed your lightsaber, ready to do what was necessary. Not because you were a Jedi, but because this was something only you could do.

Grabbing your cloak, you then ran over to the the temple, the heat of the fire getting hotter and hotter. You breathed in the smoke, before lifting your arms and slowly bringing it down, allowing the fire to simmer before completely evaporating. You then swallowed the nerves stuck in your throat, a tear rolling down your face as you realised what had enfolded.

Walking around the temple, sadness consumed you as you realised how little was left of this place, how there was nothing. You then let out a cry as you see 10 of the Padawans and Jedi members who had come back from Luke’s mission. They were now just blackened skeletons lying on the floor. One in particular was your friend Leirra, whose necklace was still around her neck. You sobbed as you unclipped her necklace, placing it in your pocket.

“I see you’re finally here,” you heard the now Kylo Ren speak. You let out a cry slowly standing up as you felt like your legs were about to give up on you. “I was going to kill Almec, but he ran away just in time. But now that I’ve killed all the Jedi, he can live out the rest of his days in regret before I eventually kill him.”

You stopped crying, a looking of nothingness on your face. You then turned around, looking at him. “Are you really gone, Ben Solo?”

“I killed that bird,” Kylo spoke, his face showing no remorse. “I’ve never been Ben. I’ve always been Kylo. I was showed the true power of the force. But I can show you, Y/N. I can show you the force. And together, we could rule the Galaxy.”

“You really aren’t Ben Solo if you thought I’d say yes to that,” you coldly spoke. Kylo looked slightly upset but quickly masked it. You then turned on your lightsaber, the mechanical hum coming to life. The white light of your saber illuminated your face and Kylo knew from the expression on your face that you weren’t coming back to him anytime soon.

“Would you really kill me, my Sun?” Kylo spat out the nickname he had for you bitterly as he took a step forward, challenging you.

“For the Jedi?” You spoke, thinking of all the people Kylo killed, including your friend Leirra. You took a step forward, pointing your lightsaber towards his neck. “Without question.”

Kylo pulled out his blue lightsaber, waiting for you to attack. You let out a war cry, running towards him. He quickly dogged you before swinging his lightsaber at your figure. You quickly slid down, avoiding the pulsing light by a millimeter.

You then swung your lightsaber the same time he did, your lightsabers letting out a loud hum as they made in contact with each other. You both looked each other in the eye as you tried to overpower each other. You felt the darkness within him, but you also felt his loneliness, his slight regret yet knowing it was too late to go back.

Eventually he overpowered you, pushing you towards the floor. Your lightsaber fell out of your hands as you tried to crawl away from Kylo who stopped you by using the force. You looked at him, now scared. Kylo had seen how afraid you were and for a slight secound, his face fell. He knew it. He knew you were scared of him. You were scared of him like everyone else was.

“Master Luke was right,” Kylo spoke, his lightsaber now millimeters away from your neck. “I did go too easy on you.”

Kylo breathed in, trying to do what he was told to do, what he was destined to do. The look of fear of him only delayed that so he looked away from you. When he finally breathed out, he swung the lightsaber back but hesitated.

And in that slight hesitation, Master Luke had swooped in, using the force to push Kylo away. He then faced you urgently, a look of seriousness in his face. “Run!”

“No, we can still save him!” You told him, as you saw Kylo get up, rubbing his head groaning.

“You cannot save him!” Luke yelled at you, his eyes wide in fury at your lack of cooperation. “Now run!”

You looked at Kylo one final time. The final time you’ll see him for years to come. His eyes made his way towards you. And the face you had made would be engrained in his face for eternity; the face of betrayal.

You turned around, before quickly bolting. You knew that Luke had a spaceship, so you’d get it in and get the hell away from the island. You will leave this island, forget about being a Jedi, about falling in love with Ben Solo. You will forget him. You have to forget him. You will leave this island and never look back. Because you could never go back to how things used to be. You could not save him.

That was your last mistake.

Taglist (CLOSED):

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how would one casually ask their s/o to dress as kylo ren and fuck them into oblivion???

asking for a friend

SOMEBODY

please link me fix your attitude

bisexual culture

a definition:

not knowing if you want to be force choked by rey or kylo ren more

His beauty never failed to astound you.

The morning light crept through your window and you slowly opened your eyes, sighing contently. For the first time in weeks you felt well rested, all thanks to him.

He was here. He was home. He was safe.

He had been gone for a month this time, one of his longest trips yet. A resistance mission to the outer rim to rescue young slave children, some possibly even force sensitive. It was an overwhelming success for the dwindling Jedi population.

You understood why he often had to leave. Gifts like his could not possibly be wasted, especially when focused on helping others.

Though he would never admit it, you knew in your heart he felt as if he could never right all the wrongs he had committed in the past. He knew that no matter what goodness he fought for, who he rescued, or what sacrifices he made, it would never be enough to redeem him. Yet, he persisted. He would never, ever fall back into his old ways. His darkest days were behind him, and he worked with every piece of his soul for the triumph of goodness in the dark world surrounding you.

He never imagined that dedicating his life to the resistance and fighting for the good of others would lead him straight to you, and you certainly never imagined falling for someone with a past like his. But his still-healing heart was one of gold, and you knew it.

Ever so slowly, as not to disturb his fragile sleep, you rolled onto your side to face him.

Your teammate. Your best friend. Your person.

You had been together for a short while now, yet you still couldn’t help but admire him as he slept. His dark hair partially covered his eyes as his chest slowly rose and fell. Minor cuts and bruises now joined the familiar scars littering his hands and arms. In this state he looked so relaxed, vulnerable, fragile even. Every fiber of his being seemed to be completely at peace. He never let anyone see this side of him when he was awake. Not even you. Not even for a single second.

That peace had been especially sparse lately. Though he felt further and further from the sith with every passing day, there were still periods when his demons took hold of him for days at a time. He would lay in bed blankly staring at the wall, sometimes attempting to meditate to keep the nightmares at bay, too afraid to move for fear he would hurt someone. He wouldn’t let you hold him or talk to him. No solution, no help, no amount of trying to get through to him, nothing could break him out.

You knew it had nothing to do with you and everything to do with his own growing and healing, but not being able to hold him through his hardest times took a toll on you. You could sense the loneliness and desperation in his bouts of darkness, but knew he didn’t trust himself to stay in control in those moments. If he ever hurt you in any way, he would never forgive himself. He would let you in on his own time, and you would be there waiting until he was ready.

He was still learning to truly trust again.

So, you settled for admiring from afar, for now. At least until you could fully convince him you were a source of healing, a safe place, that you were in this for the long haul.

And oh, you were. Lord knows, you were.

Today the demons, nightmares, and demands of the world seemed to be far away. He was all yours again, sleeping peacefully. His breathing was deep and even, face relaxed, vulnerable as ever, and in that moment you truly believed there was no way you could love him more.

You took hold of his hand and brought it up to your lips to kiss the new scratches on his knuckles. His eyelids fluttered open, revealing the gorgeous brown you had achingly missed for a month, and you could feel your heart jump just as it did the very first moment you locked eyes.

Your heart sank ever so slightly. Now that he was awake he would surely retreat back into his head, losing the state of peace you so loved to see him in. You figured he would give you a small smile and quickly turn his back to you not out of malice, but out of self-protection.

But, for once, you were wrong.

He did smile, that much you predicted, and oh how you had missed that smile. The way his face scrunched as his lips curved up. However, instead of turning his back to you, he took his hand from yours and ran it along your face, slowly caressing your cheek, seemingly trying to memorize the moment and the many freckles on your skin.

You could still feel the peace and tranquility radiating from him, and you were elated. He was choosing to trust you in this moment, to let you in and allow himself to simply breathe and feel.

His big, beautiful eyes shone in the morning sun, and you couldn’t help but smile back.

He placed a strong hand on your back and pulled you close. He pressed a light but lingering kiss on your forehead as you nuzzled into his thin shirt. You closed your eyes again, holding him tight and savoring the moment, knowing it was fleeting and the demons were bound to eventually return.

“I missed you.” He whispered into your hair.

You smiled into his strong chest. Demons be damned. In this moment, this man was yours, and you were undoubtedly his.

“Welcome home, Ben.”

—-

A/N:Hi! I’m new here. I’ve never put any of my writing out into the world like this before. Feel free to roast me, I would embrace it! Questions? Comments? Concerns? Please leave them here or on AO3! (wave0fg00dvibes)

Thank you for reading!