I know that Bungou Stray Dogs WAN! is a series of shorts that’s supposed to be just fun… or nice… or cute (and it is)
Dazai: “If I had to go, I’d like to go out just as beautifully.”
But this scene (from episode 10) made me cry.
Dazai might have said that out of his suicidal nature, or as a joke, or to be poetic but with his expression; he seemed happy and sad in that moment. I know he is happy to be with his friends, the Armed Detective Agency…
But maybe there’s still a part of him that wished he could be with Oda, to share that summer evening with him, watch the fireworks with everyone.
If Oda was still alive, they’d be partners and be on the good side. Saving lives and helping people. And be happy.
Maybe he remembered how Odasaku had to go...As the sun sets in the last moments of Oda’s life, he helped Dazai choose a different path and be on the good side.
✧･ﾟ: * Prompt ~ Kunikida, Ranpo, and Akutagawa comforting their partner through finals week ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Character/Pairing ~ Kunikida, Ranpo, and Akutagawa (individually x gn!reader) ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Content ~ How they would help their partner through finals, specifically walking up on their partner crying due to the stress ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Type ~ Fluff, headcanons ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Requested by ~ Anon~ ✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ I had a lot of fun with this one, especially as I was working on my finals too. I hope you enjoy it, and it helps ! ~
✧･ﾟ: * Kunikida
❈ Doppo understands stress as much as, if not better, than anyone. That does not mean he’s going to be the best at helping you deal with it right away. ❈ From the start of the semester, he’d have an entire schedule laid out for you, but in an attempt to help you manage your time I could see him adding to the pressure more than taking away. ❈ This is why when he walks in and you’re crying, while his first reaction might be overbearing, the second he realizes that he may have contributed to that stress he’s crushed. If you mention letting him down or something similar his heart will break, he never wants his partner to feel inadequate. | ✧ If you have to finish the work then, he’d be by your side reassuring you through it, mixed in with the apologies for the pressure. ❈ If you can take a break, or the second you’re done, he’ll clear his schedule (a big compliment from him) to take you somewhere comfortable. A nice dinner, a movie you’d been wanting to see or even just cuddling in the park. He has stress management techniques in his notebooks, and while some of them were Dazai’s tricks, he does everything he can to help you destress after the semester as well.
✧･ﾟ: * Ranpo
❈ Ranpo would be hit or miss if he noticed on his own. He would be completely capable of seeing it, he just isn’t always paying attention. So he’ll either step in before you even get to the point of that much stress, or notice once you’re on the verge of tears. But regardless, the second he sees you starting to break down, all bets are off.
❈ I could see him being the type to “pester” someone to comfort them, so he’d be on you, poking your sides, kissing your cheek, “Hey hey hey, are you good yet?” until you start laughing.
❈ Once you calmed down, he’d look over any homework you had. If it’s a question-based assignment, don’t be surprised if he can work out anything you’re getting stuck on in a heartbeat.
| ✧ I don’t think he’d be great at writing, but he’ll still support you through it, and give you some points to expand on in your papers.
❈ If you have time to take a break, he’d demand that you play a round or two of his game with him. Or five. “And bring the snacks.”
❈ He’d lay on your lap or shoulder as you work, and would occasionally reach up to kiss you softly and encourage you.
✧･ﾟ: * Akutagawa
❈ Unlike the other two, Aku would be completely oblivious the whole time. He wouldn’t even notice anything until he walks in on you crying, and would just freeze. ❈ You could almost see the calculations going on in this boy’s head. “Did I do something? No. Did I not do something? Not that I’m aware. Should I try to comfort them? We’ll see.” | ✧ I feel like he wouldn’t try to comfort you as directly. He’d leave, and then “conveniently wander back in” with your favorite snack and drink, before sitting next to you (really he prepared it and got back as fast as he could). ❈ His version of comforting words would likely have a little bit of insults in it, he’s also very blunt and doesn’t see any reason to hold back. | ✧ “So are you going to tell me what’s wrong, and how I can fix it?” For as aggressive as it might come across, he means it in the best way. Once he gets attached to someone, he’d do anything for them, and if something is actively upsetting his partner? Someone is about to lose at least a limb. ❈ When you tell him that it’s the stress from finals, he’d relax a little bit (he was still worried that he messed something up) and would start to talk you through the potential options. If that mean him taking out a professor? He doesn’t mind. ✧ He’d also probably make you take a break, even if that means grabbing your laptop with Rashomon and putting it aside (assuming you can save the assignment probably).
✧･ﾟ: * Prompt ~ Short blurbs about how the Bungo Stray Dogs boys would respond to “Pretty boy, with me I said”~ ✧･ﾟ: * Character/Pairing ~ Kunikida, Chuuya, Dazai, Atsushi, Akutagawa, Ranpo, Poe, Tanizaki, Lovecraft (individually x reader) ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Content ~ Pretty boys being blushy, what more do we need? ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Type ~ Fluff, Short Headcanons ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ I saw this post and I’ve been rolling on this ever since,,,, they’re all so pretty help ~ -repost because for some reason the tags weren’t working on the last one, so if you saw this already, sorry!-
❈ Kunikida would take a minute to realize you were talking to him, before blushing and muttering something about “inappropriate workplace behavior” on his way over. Don’t get this wrong, he absolutely loved it, and may even ask for you to call him pretty again in private. ❈ Chuuya knows he’s pretty. There’s no surprise here, so he naturally responds with a smirk and “Coming, doll.” ❈ Dazai would freeze for just a moment, before coming right over, acting like it’s without a second thought. If you two were alone, he’d then hold you in his arms, and ask if you really think he’s pretty. If this is in public, that’d be the end of it, maybe a wink at anyone he passes but would bring it up later when you two are alone. ❈ Good job, you killed Atsushi. A blushing mess, it’d take a solid minute for him to form coherent sentences. Clarify that yes, you do in fact mean him, and he’ll be over the moon for the rest of the day at least. ❈ Once again, a one-shot kill for Akutagawa. He’d absolutely freeze, before erupting into a coughing fit for a solid minute. He might even actually fall over. His amazing partner, recognizing him? And complimenting him? It’s too much for this emotionally stunted emo to take. ❈ Ranpo is well aware of how pretty he is, plus those eyes. Look at the ego on this one, do you think calling him pretty is going to make an impact? (Yes it absolutely does, and he’d be absolutely giddy the second he’s alone, he just has a reputation to maintain) ❈ Poe should be called pretty constantly, that’s just a fact. But you could call him pretty every time you talk to him, and every time he’s still going to flush bright red and stammer over himself, before trying to hide his face in his hands. He’ll still do whatever it was you needed, just, give him a minute. ❈ Tanizaki would melt, on the spot. Prepare for him blushing and cuddling you, whatever you needed would have to wait. He’s a wreck but in the best way. ❈ Lovecraft would be taken aback, especially if you’ve seen his true form to any extent. He’s inhuman, how could anyone find that attractive? But you do, and it makes his cold, wet heart(?) flutter.
✧･ﾟ: * Prompt ~ Dazai’s dating Chuuya’s twin sister ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Character/Pairing ~ Dazai x fem!reader ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Content ~ Reader is Chuuya’s twin, also in the Port Mafia ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Type ~ Fluff, Headcanons~ ✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ Why must you make Chuuya suffer this way? I’m just kidding, this was a blast to write, I hope you enjoy it! ~
❈ His teasing is relentless, especially for those he really cares about, so get ready for near-constant annoyance. And if he can piss you and Chuuya off and get the same reaction? Please, he thrives on your “suffering”
✧ He would be a lot more careful with you though, if you’re insecure about something none of his jokes will even go near mentioning it.
❈ Dazai completely would joke about not being able to tell the difference between you and Chuuya sometimes. Such as when walking up behind the two of you talking, acting like he couldn’t tell. (He always knows, but that’s not gonna stop him from messing with the two of you.) ❈ If you have an ability similar to Chuuya’s, Dazai will bug you to carry him or float stuff to him. Your brother never would, but you can’t say no to your boyfriend’s puppy dog eyes. ❈ While in the Port Mafia, your relationship would be a bit more subtle. He doesn’t want anyone there to see you as his weakness since that would put you in danger. ❈ As soon as Chuuya finds out about your relationship, (I feel like Dazai would just happen to be making out with you next to Chuuya’s office, he “completely lost track” of the fact that Chuuys was coming back already lies) Dazai is completely going to be giving you both crap for it.
✧ “How can a slug like Chuuya have such a stunning twin, you got all the pretty didn’t you my love?”
❈ Chuuya on the other hand, is completely going to try to intimidate him with the shovel talk. But with all the threats the two throw around, it’s basically a normal conversation for the two of them. ❈ You’re also pissed when Dazai ditches the Port Mafia and goes off the radar for a few years, but he does keep leaving little notes at your apartment to let you know he’s safe. ❈ When Dazai gets captured by the Port Mafia, you come to check on him. While you’re about to rip him a new one, you see him slip out of the cocky, cold mask he puts up as his heart melts seeing you. You’re the one who broke the chains for him to escape, you offered to let him out completely but he wanted the theatrics. ❈ Once you’re back together, you two will just stroll up to the other’s headquarters. And between the ADA not having an explicit reason to take you in (and not wanting to piss off the Port Mafia), and nobody wants to take on Dazai with the mafia, your work dates go fine!
✧･ﾟ: * Prompt ~ Kenji, Kyōka, and Atsushi asking the reader and Dazai how babies are made ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Character/Pairing ~ Kenji, Kyōka, Atsushi, Dazai - light Dazai x Reader implication ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Content ~ The Talk, slightly implied fem!reader but not heavily ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Type ~ Chaotic headcanons ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ I’m throwing Kenji in here because I think that Kyōka and Kenji are an adorable dynamic and would get into so many hijinks. ~
❈ Kenji and Kyōka start talking about where babies come from in the office one day and realize their stories don’t match up.
✧ Kyōka almost gets it. She had that seductress training so she understands the concept. Just the details are a little fuzzy. Such as the fact that it would not, in fact, be through bumping into someone. ✧ Kenji seems to think that storks stick a very small baby through the mom’s belly button. Not quite on the mark. ✧ They turn to Atsushi to clear the confusion up, and he panics.
❈ Atsushi would know, he’s an adult, but he’d 100% go on instinct and tell Kyōka and Kenji the same thing he told all the kids at the orphanage if they asked - “They get dropped off by the door.” ❈ After realizing this doesn’t work as well at a detective agency, he’d act like he doesn’t know, leading them to go as you and Dazai. ❈ The second the question slips out of their mouths, you see the spark in Dazai’s eyes that can only mean trouble.
✧ “There could be a demon-” “THAT’S- not necessary Dazai.” “I’m only playing, darling, seriously what do you think of me?”
❈ Between a slightly awkward stumbling through the actual process and Dazai’s occasionally helpful points, the two of them seem to get it. ❈ You’d think you’ve finally avoided the chaos until Kyōka asks a follow-up question, “If a mother dies with the baby inside her, does the baby die too?”
✧ Oh no. Once you answer her that yes, the baby would also die, you could swear you heard her mutter “36…”
❈ Thankfully, the two of them seem satisfied with those answers and go back to their work and conversations. Atsushi mouths “Thank you” to the two of you, and the rest of the day returns to normal. Or at least however normal a day for the ADA can be.
✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ I had a lot of fun with this one, I hope you enjoy it! ~
✧･ﾟ: * Osamu Dazai
❈ You’re not gonna be touch-starved with this man for long, I’ll give you that. He’s definitely one for dramatics, and if you’re comfortable with public displays of affection, he’ll have an arm around you at all times, or holding your hands and cuddling on the ADA couch (no matter how much Kunikida complains about professionalism). You’re his s/o, and if he had his way the whole world is going to know it, so loving touches in public are to be expected.
❈ Whether you’re coming out of a relationship without a lot of touching, or you’ve been single for a while, he’s going to make it his mission to make you feel loved. And if touch is what it takes, then he’s going to make sure that he’s making up for all the lost time before the two of you were together.
❈ I think that physical touch is a big love language for Dazai too, so this is also somewhat self-serving. Even when he’s not playing it up, you can still expect plenty of times where his gentle touches linger longer than necessary, or how when he comes from behind to lay his head on your shoulder as you are working on something, he’s in bliss.
✧･ﾟ: * Chuuya Nakahara
❈ I don’t think that Chuuya would be particularly touchy on his own. Not that he minds the contact, and can do it for a romantic moment, but he just doesn’t think to initiate it often. I see him as leaning toward doing things for you to be romantic, so the bigger the gesture the better in his mind.
❈ But talk to him about it! He might leave you a little touch starved at the beginning (between missions and spending his time with you trying to do things for you), so tell him that you want more touch. I mean obviously, he’s still going to want to show his love in the way that comes naturally to him, so don’t downplay it, but he’s more than down to just hold you on the couch some evenings rather than spend the whole night cleaning your place.
❈ Eventually, you both find things that hit both of your love languages! Massages come to mind, him being able to do something for you that involves that physical touch? Heavenly.
✧･ﾟ: * Kento Nanami
❈ Okay, hear me out. It takes a hot minute to get to that point. But once Nanami is comfortable with someone I just think he’d be the biggest cuddler. It’s just a vibe I get from him, he loves near-constant physical contact, who cares who sees.
❈ So if this is early into your relationship, you’re going to have a bit of a dry spell. Some handholding, maybe. I just think it’d take him a while to get adjusted to the idea that you can be a permanent part of his life. But once you have reached that point, he’s another that you’re not gonna be touch starved for long.
❈ Have conversations with him, he’s going to want to be sure that you’re getting enough out of the relationship from the get-go, but you being willing to start a conversation about your needs gives him that sense of permanence that he needs to initiate it too
❈ You’re his stress relief, and he’s sure to tell you. Whether that be leaning on his chest, stroking his hand at another stupid meeting, or a hug at the end of the day, he melts into you, and he hopes he can show you how much you mean to him through the same.
✧･ﾟ: * Megumi Fushiguro
❈ Another one who’s not going to be that into physical affection on his own. He grew up with Gojo. Who “annoyed” him and was very touchy. So touch isn’t his go-to in expressing affection, and he can be a bit tense when someone else initiates it with him.
❈ But, communication can work wonders, and talking to him, he’s more than willing to be more physical for you. And I think he’d eventually start to enjoy it more than he thought he would.
❈ He’d still be a little iffy on PDA, but he’d be willing to hold hands, and if you lean into him while you’re hanging out with friends, well he won’t mind.
❈ But in private he’ll initiate the touch a lot more since he wants to make sure you aren’t feeling unloved. I think that time would be a big love language for him, and so you laying on his chest on the couch, sitting in comfortable silence would become a standard routine for you.
✧･ﾟ: * Satoru Gojo
❈ Gojo isn’t the most receptive to your needs, but lucky for you this man is going to want to be all over you anyway. You’re gonna have a harder time keeping him off you than getting him to touch you.
❈ Incredulous that you’re touch starved. How doesn’t everyone just want to be holding you constantly? You’re so holdable? He just assumes that his thoughts are universal, or the only correct ones at least, so the thought that you haven’t been constantly given all the physical affection is wild to him. (Though that doesn’t mean that he isn’t going to be possessive if anyone else tries)
❈ But once he finds out that this is one of your needs, he will be extra conscious of it, and I feel like he’d be checking in with you fairly often. He’d play it off as a joke most of the time. “What, do you need me to hold you more or something?”, but he does seriously want to be sure he’s meeting your needs.
✧･ﾟ: * Prompt ~ Fluff headcanons with Kunikida, Atsushi, Dazai, and Poe with a s/o who is weak to lower temperatures ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Characters ~ Kunikida, Atsushi, Dazai, Poe (individually x gn!reader) ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Content ~ Reader that’s weak to cold, fluff all around, brief death mention (it’s Dazai) ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Type ~ Fluff, headcannons ~ ✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ This one was a ton of fun to write, I threw Poe in there as well because I had some ideas for him too. I hope you like it! ~
✧･ﾟ: * Doppo Kunikida
❈ This man is hard at work reorganizing his notes to make sure that everything he plans will make you comfortable as soon as possible. There might be some slight grumbling about having to rework it all, but he’s really more than happy to do it and loved the chance to review everything. | ✧ Expect a lot of clarifying questions, if you’re comfortable with them, to make sure he’s doing everything properly. Is it only under certain conditions? Are foods an issue? What should he have on him to help most effectively? ❈ As soon as he has his new plan, he will be on it 100%. Before you even have the chance to become uncomfortable, he’ll correct any issues. Always has a spare jacket with him if he’s going to be with you, just in case. And maybe an extra spare, to be safe. ❈ He will definitely curse out the weather if it changes too fast. I feel like he’d be the type to complain about it if it was different than the forecast anyway, but if it’s making his s/o uncomfortable? Unacceptable. ❈ He just wants you to be perfectly content at all times, and anything in his power he can do to help with that, you can consider it done.
✧･ﾟ: * AtsushiNakajima
❈ I feel like he’d be very aware of your needs generally, but especially with the cold, considering what he was wearing before he got an outfit from the ADA. | ✧His old orphanage messed up a perfectly good man, that’s what they did. Look at it, it’s got anxiety. ❈ That being said, he will now make sure he does everything he can to keep you warm. Make sure that you always have enough layers available, anywhere you’re staying is well heated enough, the works. ❈ He probably runs warm, so he’s more than happy to cuddle up to you, and will initiate it anytime he sees you shivering. I think he’d also use his ability, so you could snuggle up with his warm fur when you’d like.
✧･ﾟ: * Osamu Dazai
❈ Get ready for plenty of jokes about freezing to death together, it comes with the territory. ❈ He will do a lot to make sure that you’re accommodated though it will either be very obvious or things you’d never even think to question. ❈ Most of the things he does without you even knowing, or anyone else realizing for that matter. As soon as he finds out, you’re never going on a mission/errand in the cold again. It just won’t even come up, he’ll keep the conversation toward any other options to go. If you work for the ADA with him, the building will always be kept high enough that he doesn’t need to worry about you. | ✧ Though Kunikida would definitely complain about the constant use of electricity being out of budget if he didn’t know why. ❈ But, doing things to help you that you notice? Expect a big show, all the dramatics. Flailing and acting like he’s going to freeze without it when he gives you his coat (those bandages keep him plenty warm don’t worry about it), or the absolute quest that is going into the other room and grabbing you a blanket for movie night. ❈ He wants the attention, after all, if he’s doing so much for you like this, you simply must thank him for it.
✧･ﾟ: * Edgar Allan Poe
❈ I think that Poe runs cold anyway, look at him, he definitely has no circulation. | ✧ This is not helped by the fact that he picks janky old buildings, abandoned castles, and victorian style mansions anytime he can for the aesthetic. ❈ So, with a s/o that’s bad with cold, it’s both a blessing and a curse. He’ll be worried about you, and fretting over making everything comfortable for you, but making him actually warm-up is definitely good for him. Use those fancy fireplaces for once. ❈ He has enough layers to share though and will do so. If he notices you getting chilly, he’ll be quick to give you his cape and ribbon, and more if you need them. | ✧ Also, Karl makes a great lap (or shoulder, chest, etc) warmer, and will gladly sit on you as well. ❈ Warm this boy up with you? Please, he needs it. Grab him and cuddle next to the (sixth) industrial-strength space heater he just bought you.
✧･ﾟ: * Content ~ pining, domestic, major character death, injury ~
✧･ﾟ: * Type ~ Drabble, fluff to angst ~
✧･ﾟ: * Author’s Note ~ Just a little angsty idea I had, and needed to share the hurt ~
❈ Kunikida, the man with his entire life planned out to the moment, every goal is written down, is surprised when he realizes the one who meets his every standard is the new member of the Armed Detective Agency. He reads over his spousal plan project again, and you met every condition he laid out. Your eyes meet as the blush crosses his face, before he hurries back into his writing, planning out how he will court you.
❈ Kunikida doing everything he can to impress you, every method he’s heard of to get your attention, before you laugh one day and tell him he’s trying too hard, he already has it. His heart melts at your soft smile, as he officially asks you out on an (ideal) first date.
❈ Kunikida feels your hand on his when Dazai is testing his patience, tracing little circles with your thumb to calm him down. Seeing your smile again, listening closely as he talks about his plans for the future, giving him little notes on things that he hadn’t considered, and he knows he’s found his ideal partner.
❈ Kunikida, the man with his entire life planned out to the moment, with goals and ideals motivating every action, starts enjoying the little things in between. He starts to enjoy each step on the way, rather than just making it through.
❈ Kunikida finds himself enjoying the spare seconds in his day when things run just a little ahead of schedule since he can spend those moments with you. The ride over to the Agency being a minute faster means that you two can glance in the windows of the shops on the way, and he can take note of the little things that catch your eye, that smile lighting up his day.
❈ Kunikida wakes up earlier than was necessary each day so he can have both of your lunches packed, and everything else prepared for the day to make it easy. Getting lost in the idea of a family with you, whether that be the two of you and pets, kids, or even just going through life together. He sets out two cups of coffee as your alarm goes off, and waits at the table while skimming the agenda for the day. Your smile in the morning when you sit across from him makes it worth every extra second.
❈ Kunikida ran through every possible route across the city in his mind, trying to come up with the fastest way for Yosano to arrive, but none will get there in time. This isn’t how it was supposed to go.
❈ Kunikida treating your wound with everything available, frantically searching for more ways to keep you alive for a few minutes untill help can arrive. He only stops when he hears your voice telling him to just come hold you, he’s done enough. He’ll never think he did.
❈ Kunikida holding you close to his chest as you softly hold his face, smiling that same smile as you thank him with your final breaths.
❈ Kunikida, the man with his entire life planned out to the moment, every goal is written down, never thought that this is how it would end.
Request:“Heyoo :”) Can you do a fluff BSD Lovecraft x female reader where the reader is like,, trying so hard to show some affection to Lovecraft but always ended up being a blushing mess?? And he’s trying so hard to figure it out what I’m trying to say or do or something (idk if this makes sense lmao) Basically wholesome stuff going on except the reader is always flustered lmfao, ;w; or probably like if he’s tryna give the reader a present or something and all that blushing thing happened AJASJSHSJ IDK IF THIS REALLY MAKES SENSE LMAO“
Pairing: H.P. Lovecraft x Reader
Summary:Somehow you managed to rope yourself up with what you’ve decided to call a God. Lovecraft has been with you for long while and he continues to fascinate you everyday. Slowly but surely, you’ve become rather affectionate of him as you help him slowly become more and more human.
His own emotions will leave you breathless.
Warnings:None,FLUFF
A/N: This one was actually quite cute to write! I hope you enjoy it and I’ve done the request some justice. :)
He is neither bored nor entertained. He observes quietly but remains oblivious. One cannot tell if he is listening or not. Perhaps he simply doesn’t care.
However, if you watch him long enough, you’ll know him a little better. His shifts in expression are small and rare. He does in fact, feel amusement from your jokes and his soft unyielding gaze will often travel beside you.
AAAHHH IM CRYING SO HARD, YOU DID IT SO WELL AND LITERALLY FULFILLED MY REQUEST :"DD This brings me so much comfort and it’s so fun to read it!! Thank you so much aaahh this is so cute <333
I can tell that you’ve put so much thought into writing this and it’s just :”) I really love it THANK YOU!! <3
I realized I never posted this one on tumblr but please check out the first 2 chapters of Riptide if you’re interested, and of course if you like it leave a comment and tell me!
ao3 link title:rose water and thorns word count: 2650 summary:When Atsushi started attending the Armed Student Council’s regular meetings, he never expected a string of ghost sightings to dominate their discussions. Mr. Kunikida assigns the student council to get to the bottom of the disturbance once and for all, so OF COURSE the task falls on their newbie to investigate.
So he does the only thing he can think of: he begs the most level-headed, rational person he knows to help him. Turns out, researching with Akutagawa is the most fun he’s had in a long, long time.
-
Part 1/3 of my fic for the @sskk-bigbang. Includes amazing fanart by @/sala218 on twitter. <3 Apologies for the posting delay!
ao3 link title:an ode to hats word count: 1560 summary:Akutagawa isn’t exactly built for a leisurely summer stroll down the boardwalk. Being on a mission with Chuuya-san doesn’t make it any better.
ao3 link title:indigo word count: 2470 summary:They’ve finally found refuge in an underground camp. Now it’s time for Ryuunosuke to pick up the pieces and heal from the horrors he’s witnessed on the surface. An unlikely peacekeeper, a boy about his age with wide, violet eyes, seems to see right through him.
And maybe this, too, is enough.
For@annakanezawa! In celebration of my 100th published AO3 fic (without counting the handful of fics on e3asi ^^;). I hope you all enjoy!
Long overdue, but here’s a masterpost of my fanfic submissions to @shinsoukoku-week last month. Apologies for the delay, but I haven’t been able to post on tumblr for a while. :$
Request:“Heyoo :”) Can you do a fluff BSD Lovecraft x female reader where the reader is like,, trying so hard to show some affection to Lovecraft but always ended up being a blushing mess?? And he’s trying so hard to figure it out what I’m trying to say or do or something (idk if this makes sense lmao) Basically wholesome stuff going on except the reader is always flustered lmfao, ;w; or probably like if he’s tryna give the reader a present or something and all that blushing thing happened AJASJSHSJ IDK IF THIS REALLY MAKES SENSE LMAO“
Pairing: H.P. Lovecraft x Reader
Summary:Somehow you managed to rope yourself up with what you’ve decided to call a God. Lovecraft has been with you for long while and he continues to fascinate you everyday. Slowly but surely, you’ve become rather affectionate of him as you help him slowly become more and more human.
His own emotions will leave you breathless.
Warnings:None,FLUFF
A/N: This one was actually quite cute to write! I hope you enjoy it and I’ve done the request some justice. :)
He is neither bored nor entertained. He observes quietly but remains oblivious. One cannot tell if he is listening or not. Perhaps he simply doesn’t care.
However, if you watch him long enough, you’ll know him a little better. His shifts in expression are small and rare. He does in fact, feel amusement from your jokes and his soft unyielding gaze will often travel beside you.
Lovecraft does not leave your side often but when he is beside you, one may notice that his peculiar gaze will reveal a little more than before. The shine in his eyes is unmistakable. And if someone is very lucky, they may even spot the rare smile he reveals.
You walk beside Lovecraft even now as he watches the path ahead of the both of you. He towers above everyone as they move aside for him. He reaches out a hand and gently grasps your elbow, tugging you closer towards him allowing the sea of people to give you more leeway to walk without bumping into every second person. You blush slightly at the feel of his long fingers against your skin. Cool and comforting as always. Today, your godly companion has asked you to take him somewhere that you like. You believe he said something about trying to find a human experience.
You cough gently to get his attention and his eyes snap towards you.
“You certainly attract a lot of attention. Perhaps it’s because you’re beautiful”
He cocks his head towards you and leans down even more, his long hair cascades over his shoulder and gently brushes against your cheeks. He moves even closer. He didn’t hear you.
You blush and quickly stutter out, “The store is only a road away. We make a left here.”
He nods once but sends you a confused look and leads you around the corner where the crowd thins out considerably. He releases his grip on your arm. You suddenly feel very exposed.
“Thank you.”
“Of course, I wouldn’t want you getting lost.”
Your face heats up as you clear your throat awkwardly. You send a silent prayer that he doesn’t notice how much you’ve been blushing today. may the Gods have mercy. You wave your hand in the direction of the book store up ahead. A sign sits above the door. Novel Bound is deeply etched into the wood, the timber appears to be splintering in some places but the sign still stands strong. It’s one of the oldest book stores you know and by far your favourite.
Lovecraft’s eyes slide over the sign before he steps into the store. You follow suit and take a deep breath. The smell of strong coffee and old books washes over you. The door closes behind you and the rest of the world drowns out. The store has a quiet that would almost be deafening if it weren’t for the occasional light footsteps and the classical music that breathes into the air. The most magical part of the store would be it’s towering bookcases that cover floor to ceiling. Pillars of dark oak teeming with knowledge.
Lovecraft walks through the store taking in all the details. He reaches out a hand and runs it along the wood. He caresses the grooves. His eyes pass over a selection of American fiction novels, halting for a second on a novel titled The Shadow of time, before he walks away moving from bookshelf to bookshelf. He moves like a ghost, a whisper between the shelves.
You catch his eye as he passes you. Despite his usually expressionless gaze, you can read the curiosity in his eyes. His usually enigmatic gaze reveals his excitement to you. You didn’t think an old bookstore would excite him so much. But perhaps, even he would not be immune to the feeling the timeless bookstore bestows upon its customers.
You leave Lovecraft to his own devices and begin to search the store for a book that catches your attention.
______________
Crime and Punishment sits firmly in your grasp as you search for Lovecraft. When you find him, you find yourself simply unable to breathe.
Sunlight cascades through an open window. Golden hues fall across his pale complexion as he sits on a chair, flipping through a novel. The light accentuates the sharp plains of his face and adds a flush of colour to his lips. His hair falls like a river of ink around his face. His gaze studies the book carefully, a slight furrow between his brows. The world simply doesn’t breathe as he cocks his head thoughtfully.
You hold your breath. Even if you didn’t already know, it would be at this point where you would believe he is a God.
You hesitate, not wanting to shatter his moment of peace but also not willing to disturb the sight of him. Like a ripple in a pond, you would hate to break the moment of absolute stillness. You wish you could capture this exact moment on a painting for a picture could never contain such beauty. But perhaps a painting could aptly express how endearing the sight is. Unfortunately, he glances up and watches you coolly. You move towards him and on impulse, you reach out a hand and brush it across his hair. You retract your hand quickly. You instantly redden. How bold.
“You’re very… Um.. is that the book you would like?”, you choke out. Handsome, you wanted to say handsome but his eyes swallowed you too quickly and too deeply. You’re surprised you were even able to get so much out.
He rises to his feet and nods but the crease between his eyes persists. You lead him to the till and pay for both books. Leaving the store is never pleasant but Lovecraft walks beside you with a sure stride and you begin to head home. But, the sun is beginning to droop in the sky, and you change course suddenly and speed up a little. The store is close to the ocean and you drag Lovecraft behind you, steps never faltering, as you bring him to a sight you know will simply take his breath away.
The sun drops to the horizon line, casting vivid colours across the sky. Hues of pink and deep oranges leap across the sky. Lovecraft rests beside you and watches the sun disappearing intently. He is silent. His gaze is sharp. He drinks in every little detail, every soft change of light.
“Pretty”, you say, and he nods. But your eyes are no longer watching the sky nor the ocean.
He turns to look at you with his deep grey eyes. A gaze that buries into you. It erupts butterflies in your stomach and burns down every coherent thought you can possibly attempt to muster.
“Very Pretty”
He quirk an eyebrow at you, possibly the most human expression you’ve ever seen him make. You flush.
“Wait here”, he says before turning and disappearing into the crowd. How he managed to simply disappear while being so tall surprises you. He must be moving very quickly
He reappears a second later and places a bottle of water into your hands. Water?
You shoot him a puzzled look but before any words can come out he places the palm of his hand flat onto your forehead. He places his other hand on his own and everything clicks. He’s checking your temperature.
“Are you feeling okay? You seem a little warm.”
“I-I’m fine. Why would you think I’m ill?”
“You’ve been strange. You’ve been coughing a lot today”, he points at your face. “And you’ve been very red the whole day.”
The gods betrayed you.
For a second you genuinely don’t know if he’s mocking you but you recall his words from this morning and realize that he’s dead serious.
“I’m not sick.”
Lovecraft shakes his head, “Is your throat sore? The book says that if your throat is sore you could have the flu.”
“What book?” you ask.
He shakes his head and opens the water and pushes it into your hands again. “I found a book earlier. You’re still red, drink some more water. Humans need a lot of water.”
He places a hand on your cheek and for a moment, he looks genuinely worried. The furrow between his brows deepens even more as he takes in your current state. “You’re warmer.”
Of course I’m warmer, you keep getting closer and closer. You’re not sure how to explain the difference between the flu and having a crush, to a God. But he leans over you in a way that blocks everyone off and your head keeps spinning. Perhaps, having a flu and having a crush feel the same. You take a sip of your water. You turn towards him. He’s leaning over you so closely that his hair creates a curtain that blocks out the world.
“You’re very close”, you whisper. He makes a move to step away but you grab onto his jacket and hold him to you. Perhaps you are feeling too bold. But he says nothing and wraps his arms around you.
“Are you sure you are okay?” He asks. You fall into him, allowing his earthy scent to swallow you whole. Perhaps, it’s the lapping of ocean waves, or the buzz of the emerging nightlife or even just his presence alone but you feel quite at peace. Drowsy even.
“I don’t know why this upsets me so much.”
You smile, “perhaps you are beginning to care about a human.”
Of Course, shouldn’t Gods care about humans.
Lovecraft has a way of surprising you every step of the way. Ever since you first ran into him.
Even now, as he leans down and brushes his lips across your forehead. He surprises you. You still beneath him. His hand reaches for your chin and his long slender fingers angle your face towards his.
His gaze is sharp and intense but soft all the same. You feel like glass beneath his touch and for the first time. You can see a million conflicting emotions in his gaze.
He leans down once again but his destination has changed as soft lips brush against your own.
Because It’s You (Part 2) | H.P. Lovecraft x Reader
Request:“A Part 2 of their future together.”
Pairing: H.P. Lovecraft x Fem!Reader
Summary:(Soulmate AU), From birth you’re soulmate has always been a mystery even his mark was hard to decipher but as he stands before you, you realize that there is far more to the man they call Lovecraft.
A continuation of the first part told in a collection of short drabbles.
Warnings:None
___________________
___________________
Lovecraft certainly had a few secrets and many talents hidden up his sleeve. Literally.
Roughly three years have passed since you first laid eyes on him. You absently thumb over the mark as you think back on all the moments that you two have shared. It’s been a peaceful three years, despite his initial reluctance. The Guild hasn’t bothered you once, nor the Agency.
You lean forward, lighter in hand as you press it against the wick of the tall white candle. You go down the row and light up each one as you pass. The candle’s warm glow illuminates the room and casts shadows across the walls as you fidget around the table.
Two plates of food sit on the table, both steaming with a meal that you have prepared to the best of your abilities. You turn and fetch the ice bucket from the fridge and a bottle of fine red wine which you place onto a separate smaller table nearby along with a neatly wrapped gift.
The sound of a key turning in the lock alerts you. Lovecraft has finally arrived. You quickly duck behind the corner of the wall, allowing the deep shadows to hide your presence as you watch him step into the room. The soft thudding of his footsteps pause.
“Love?” He asks while stepping into the light. The light highlights the sharp angles of his face creating deep shadows. His eyes however are warm.
You step out from behind the corner, a smile on your face, you say, “Happy three year anniversary.”
You shyly lick your lips as he walks towards you. He reaches out his arms and encases you into a warm hug. His cool lips brush across your forehead.
“Happy three year anniversary”, he murmurs.
“Do you like it?
He chuckles and nods his head, “I love it.”
You reach for the present you got him and hold it out. A ghost of a smile lines his lips as he tears away at the paper. You brought him a pair of soft gloves with his initials sewn into it seeing as all of his other ones have been destroyed. He holds them up to the light and gives them an appreciative nod.
“Hmm, I like them.”, he says. Truly a man of few words but you’ve known him long enough to know that he truly likes them.
You take the wrapping paper and turn away from him to cast it into a bin you placed nearby when a loud thump has you whipping your head back to him.
For a moment, you think he has fallen but instead he kneels before you with anxiety flitting across us eyes. He reaches into the pocket of his midnight cloak and pulls out a small box. He holds it up to the warm glowing light and pops open the velvety lid.
“Will you marry me?”
His question has the world crashing around you. Every memory shared together comes to mind and for a moment you are thrown back in time to the image of a man who wants almost nothing to do with you. A man who frowns constantly and has a presence that could make the world go still around him. Whose face was carved from unyielding stone that reveals nothing. You compare him to the love of your life who kneels before you. His anxious and warm eyes stare up at you.
And you nod. You reach for the ring as tears prick at the corner of your eyes. He immediately stands up and goes to cradle your face. Tears are now falling freely. He rubs his thumb soothingly over your cheeks.
“I’m sorry”, he says, “I don’t want to see you cry.”
You shake your head and finally choke out the words that need to be said, “Of Course I’ll marry you. I Love you.”
“Shh, don’t cry.”
“You let out a laugh, people cry when they are happy too. I’m just so unbelievably happy. Thank You, Howard. Thank you for giving us a chance.”
He smiles faintly as his thumb brushes your lip. “Thank you for accepting me. Thank you for loving me back. If you are happy, then I will be too. If you are sad, then I will be here to comfort you and if you are angry, I will break down the world with you.”
You chuckle. You know he’s serious.
Finally, he slips the ring onto your finger. The light catches it beautifully and you simply wish to stay in this moment forever. But then you would miss the future and every moment you will spend alongside him.
“I Love you”, you murmur. The words seem to slip freely of their own accord. “I will always be here for you.”
He murmurs it back. Sweet promises and words of infinite love surround you as his lips press against your own.
_______________________________________
“Why is Mommy so fat?”
Howard spits out his tea and coughs loudly. He reaches for the jug of water and pours himself a glass before taking slow slips.
“Now, I wouldn’t say she’s getting fat.”
The little boy, Oliver, looks up at his father with his brilliant violet eyes. They reflect his clear disagreement as he says, “She’s super big, Daddy. She wasn’t this big last year.”
“That’s very smart of you to notice”, says Howard. Oliver gives him a ‘No duh’ look and Lovecraft quickly tries to think of a way to explain it, or make up an excuse. Perhaps, explaining pregnancy to a six year old isn’t the best idea.
“Well, uh, you see…”, Crap. How did Y/N explain it? “She’s going to continue getting very big and then one day… Um.. the belly will go away and then you’ll have a little brother or sister.”
“What does any of that have to do with having a brother?”
Crap. Are six year old’s supposed to be this perceptive?
“Ask your mother.”
“Ask me what?”, you say as you walk into the dining room. You walk up to your darling little Angel and kiss him on the cheek before walking over to your husband and pecking him on the lips. You pour yourself a glass of water before holding the glass to your lips.
“Mommy, why are you fat?”
You spit out the water. Oliver throws you both a look of horror.
“Oliver, it’s not very nice to ask people that.”
Maybe Howard should’ve said that too and avoided the conversation. But you can’t randomly bring a baby home without telling him. Oliver stays quiet before he pipes up, “Dad says that when the stomach goes away, I’m going to have a brother or a sister.”
You think for a second before ruffling your son’s hair, “Would you like a brother or sister?”
He thinks for a second before slowly nodding. You smile and kiss him on the forehead.
“I know you’ll be the best of friends.”
Howard nods in agreement. He reaches out his hand and grasps your fingers in his own and begins to rub soothing circles onto your hand. A habit he picked up years ago. For Howard, it’s almost like his own way of telling you that he approves. Well done, you’ve done a good job. You turn your hand around and slip your fingers together. You rub circles onto his hand. You send him a wink. Yeah,wehave.
_______________
“Well, are you going to be okay on your own?”, you ask.
Howard drops the last box on the floor of the cramped dorm room. He looks over it once and gives a disapproving scowl.
“Maybe it would be better to rent an apartment”
You can’t help but nod in agreement. Olivia immediately shoots up and cries out a NO.
“The dorm is perfect, it’s a good way to make friends in the first year.” Olivia’s long dark hair falls over her eyes as she looks up defiantly. Well, it’s her college experience after all. She may do as she pleases.
After helping your 18 year old daughter move into her new dorm, you and Howard disappear. You walk towards the car hand in hand. His thumb rubs over yours.
“We’ve done well”, he says. His eyes shine with bright intent.
“That’s the final bird.”
“I wouldn’t say the nest is empty though.”, he squeezes your hand. “We still have each other, we always have.”
You smile up at him. Although age was withered away at the both of you, he still looks gorgeous. His sharp features are still prominent even as his skin begins to sag. You admire him.
Over the years, his soft hidden smiles have become full on grins and you watch as smile simply graces the world with its presence. True Beauty
You take a strand of hair behind your ear as you look away. The rest of your lives. Somehow, that doesn’t seem like enough time. You wish to never leave his side. You squeeze his hand tightly and he squeezes back. He pulls you into his side as you walk away from the University. The nest only has two birds left. A new chapter is beginning.
____________
“How long have you been here?”
You do not have to move your eyes to know Oliver is standing a few feet away. His violet watches you as he approaches the bench. He sits himself beside you. Flowers in hand.
You mull over the question, “I think I got here around ten this morning.”
He checks his watch and swears under his breath, “Mom, it’s one in the afternoon.”
You smile, “Don’t get cheeky with your mother.”
You finally turn away and look at him. He’s grown into a fine man and a spitting image of his father. “I’ve been here for a while, yes, but these days, I don’t have much to do.”
“You really miss him”, he says, not so much as a question but rather as a statement.
You stand up and kneel before the tombstone, running your hands along the letters:
Howard Philip Lovecraft.
“Of Course I do, the things that I would do just to hear him laugh again.”
“Dad didn’t really laugh”, Oliver says.
“He would, on occasion. It was a beautiful sound.”
Oliver nodded before setting down the flowers and lighting an incense. You stand beside your son, who’s long grown up. You think of his little sister. Well, she’s not so little anymore.
“Your sister?”
“She’s at home. She’s preparing the food.”
You nod again. These days, you don’t say as much as you used to. Age is slowly catching up. You break out into a fit of coughs. Oliver leaps from his chair and comes to support you. You feel frail next to him but fear does not grip you. Not now. You will not be panicked. You rest a hand on Oliver’s arm, “Do not fret so much over me.”
“I only do it because you do not fret enough.”
“Hmmph, We all have our time, mine isn’t this soon.”
“Geez Mom, don’t say that”, Oliver stays silent for a beat before adding, “Aren’t you afraid?”
“Of death? Why would I be when I know he is waiting for me?”.
You smile as you turn away from the sun. Smiling down at your son who swears that between the shadows he’s watching his mother become young again. A young Y/N who would breeze through the streets of Yokohama dodging danger and somehow ending up with a wanted criminal. Who was daring and bold and yet so deeply in love with a strange traveler.
And the young maiden and the strange traveler were never truly apart after meeting. Fate truly has a fascinating way of entangling lives.
But the shadows fade away and you are walking away. Walking onto the next step. Tying up the rest of your ends and enjoying the rest of your life. Howard will always be there. He will always wait. You know he wants you to finish first and then, you will move on together.
Because it’s You (Part 1) | H.P. Lovecraft x Reader
Request:“BSD Lovecraft x female reader. What if the reader isn’t afraid of him and asks to see his true form and she thinks his true form looks cool? Soulmate au. Fluff to smut. Maybe he could use his ability in the smut part if that’s ok?”
Pairing: H.P. Lovecraft x Fem!Reader
Summary:(Soulmate AU), From birth you’re soulmate has always been a mystery even his mark was hard to decipher but as he stands before you, you realize that there is far more to the man they call Lovecraft.
Warnings:NSFW, Fluff to Smut. The smut is right at the end so you are able to read until the warning. Dom!Lovecraft x Brat!Reader 18+ ONLY
Word Count: 3363
A/N: By Far my longest fic yet and one of the more interesting ones to write. Lovecraft strikes me as a character that cares deeply but says very little when speaking with his s/o. As Always, Enjoy :)
“Soulmate Au, where you have a mark on your wrist that represents your soulmate that becomes colour when you meet them”
From birth you’ve always had a rather strange mark. Your parents figured that perhaps when you were older the mark would look a bit different but instead it remained in the strange shape. The mark appears to be sludge? A flower? It’s a rather messy pile of something, topped with bat wings? You’ve sat and tried to decipher it for years up until today, you’re still unsure as to what it could represent.
You even took up art classes and tried to redraw the mark with different shapes and colours. At the end of the day, you’re not sure what it means. You only hope that it’s not a pile of drugs topped with wads of cash or something. You wouldn’t want your soulmate to be some sort of drug dealer. In any case, those art classes paid off and you’re currently in charge of your own studio.
You walk down the street and breathe in the damp Yokohama air. The air is musty but it’s to be expected as your current route for the day leads you past the port. The port is loud and chatty, people are gossiping everywhere about Yokohama’s most recent events. You pick up keywords here and there such as: “Port Mafia”, “Guild”, “detectives” and so on and so forth.
You spot a nearby Hawker selling newspapers and you decide to ask him about the commotion. The man holds out a newspaper with an incredulous look. “You don’t know? It’s about the whale that dropped out of the sky the other day. Some organization from overseas was behind it. They’re also linking it to a car crash in the mountains. Bah! But I know nothing. You’ll have to buy a paper to know more.”
You give him your own incredulous look before purchasing a paper. You skim it as you walk and learn about the hero Agency. As you flip over the page your eye catches onto the photo. A tall figure shrouded in black is standing next to a short ‘farm boy’. The photo is somewhat grainy but clear enough to see that the man has sharp features. He looks quite handsome.
You shake your head. No. He’s a criminal. You skim through the rest of the article but the photo is just so eye-catching. You run a finger over the image. He has long hair that blends into his coat. It’s hard to tell just how long his hair is. A mysterious aura surrounds such a person, perhaps if you are lucky, you could one day sketch the planes of his face.
Right, because you’re definitely going to chase down the mystery man just to draw him. You roughly bundle up the newspaper and shove it into your bag. You look up and realise that along your walk you’ve obviously gotten a bit lost and have wandered into a deserted part of the harbour. You spin around quickly, intending to retrace your steps when you slam into a wall and topple over.
A wall? But you’ve just come this way. You raise your eyes and meet another pair of sharp purple ones. They are oddly striking. The figure stands in front of you, as tall and immovable as a statue. An odd sensation flushes over you and you suddenly feel as if you know this person. Of course, this is the striking man from the paper. His mysterious aura seems to have followed him off of the page and into reality.
He cocks his head at you, allowing long strands of hair to fall. His hair is as dark as ink and much longer than you had assumed.
“Sorry”, he mutters and extends his right hand towards. The invitation warms your heart. You swallow down the feeling, you’ve only met the man.
You latch on to his hand as he lifts you up gently. His fingers are very long and slender. He has the hands of an artist. They are also freezing cold. He looks down and pauses and while not letting go of your hand, he turns your intertwined hands so his wrist faces upwards. A beautiful Iris adorns his wrist. The colours are breathtaking in your eyes. The Iris is a truly a beautiful flower and his specific mark has captured the varying hues of purple and blue perfectly. It is your favourite flower and the flower that gave its name to your studio and a collection of paintings you’ve created.
You want to run your fingers over it but before you can do that, he flips his wrist over so that your mark now faces upwards. The odd mark has now been graced with an assortment of light greens. With shading the mark has become both clearer and yet all the more confusing. He eyes your mark and then his before he finally raises his eyes to meet your own. He scans your face before he lets go of your hand.
He leans down to pick up your bag before placing it into your arms. And without a word, he spins on his heel and begins to walk away.
What? Where the fuck does he think he’s going?
You sling your bag over your shoulder and follow after him. “Uh Hey, wait!”, you shout after him. “Can we talk?”
He doesn’t spare you a glance as you begin to jog to match his speed. You jog beside him but he seems intent on marching forward with his long legs. You’re sure he would walk through a wall at this rate.
“Please wait, can we just talk for two minutes? I’m not sure what I did but maybe if you tell me, I can fix it.”
Nothing. Talking really isn’t your strong suit but you absolutely have to speak to this man. His hard features barely flinch. You’re beginning to feel flustered and tears are welling up at the back of your eyes.
“Oi, Lovecraft, ‘been looking for you everywhere!”, a shout echoes.
The man, Lovecraft, finally stops in his tracks and looks back. A shorter man in overalls is sauntering down the pathway with a cocky smile on his face. Lovecraft looks him over once before turning his attention towards you.
“You should leave-”, he suddenly stops.
His eyes widen as he sees you. Your face has reddened and a few tears have slipped past. His face makes you want to cry harder and you bite your lower lip in frustration. He sighs before turning towards the other man and stepping in front of you.
“Go away, John.”
John throws him a confused look. He begins to circle you both but Lovecraft proceeds to shield you from the other’s sight.
“Now”,says Lovecraft.
John throws up his hands in surrender and says, “Alright. Alright. I’m leaving but you stay safe pal.”
He then turns and leaves but not without a few glances your way but Lovecraft doesn’t move until he’s out of sight.
Lovecraft turns and looks at you and you feel dwarfed by his size. He sighs, “Fine, two minutes.”
______________________________
You weren’t sure what exactly you wanted to say nor are you sure how serious he is about the time limit. Not wanting to try and win over your soulmate near the harbour surrounded by the tangy smell of oil and fish, you offer to go elsewhere to talk. He agrees and he follows you in silence. You decide that the time spent on the way doesn’t count. You walk side by side and he attracts a few curious looks. The hawker who sold you the newspaper gawks at you as you walk past obviously noticing the resemblance to the picture. You speed up your pace and decide to loop back to your design studio.
You unlock the door and step inside while gesturing to him to follow but his eyes are glued to the sign above the door. More specifically the iris flower that was painted on. The Logo of your design studio.
You laugh awkwardly, “Uhh yeah, I like Iris flowers. I like most plants in general but I think the iris is the best. I made an art series dedicated to the flower and it became quite popular so when I opened the studio I decided to use it as my logo.”
“This is your studio?”
He steps in and scans the surroundings. The studio is messy and you feel embarrassed for not cleaning it up better. Your studio is situated in an old building with tall windows that allow light to filter through. It’s nothing more than a few rooms stuffed with equipment, tables and chairs but it’s your pride and joy. Nothing has pleased you more in the past year then being able to teach students how to paint.
“Yeah, it’s not much.”
“Can I see the paintings?”
You smile sheepishly, “Unfortunately, they’re not here at the moment. They’re at the Art gallery. I do have one piece though that I kept for myself.”
You walk out the room and he trailers after you as you step into your private studio. On the back wall is a canvas with a foreboding size. It looms over the room but the colours are bright and peaceful. It depicts a field of blue and purple Iris flowers, with the closest one being painted in excruciating detail. Lovecraft doesn’t move but simply studies his wrist instead as though comparing the two images.
“So I guess, that’s where the Mark comes from”, you look down at your own mark, a creature that seems indescribably horrifying, “may I ask what this means?”
Lovecraft narrows his eyes at your wrist, “A very good reason to stay away from me. I’m not human.”
You stare at him. His tone doesn’t sound teasing but surely it’s a joke? Have you misread the room?
“I should go”
“NO!” you lunge forward and grab onto the sleeve of his jacket. “I’m not scared or anything.”
Perhaps the situation is strange but you were willing to put in the effort. You lick your chapped lips, his eyes lock onto this particular movement.
“Can we please just try.”
He stares at you carefully before nodding his head.
_______________________
Three months go by and you see him almost everyday. Sometimes he only visits you briefly between classes, sometimes he spends the day in the studio quietly sitting in the corner. He does very little but he constantly keeps watch. Generally though he is sleeping in the corner with his feet propped up while you hum a tune. He almost never bothers you. You also discovered that he has quite the liking for chocolate and ice cream. He often brings you sweet treats as a gift but eats them himself. You’ve decided to keep a few tubs of ice cream at the studio now.
While you two become closer you also took some initiative to look into the Guild which led you down a path of learning about Gifted. Eventually you convinced him to start going out with you. He seems unfamiliar with Japanese food and frankly, Japan as a whole.You are determined to show him what life is like in Yokohama. Today, you’ve convinced him to follow you to the beach.
“So the Guild is disbanded?”
He looks up at you surprised before he responds, “I never really worked for the Guild, I worked for Francis. We had a deal.”
“What was the deal?”
“Doesn’t matter now. The contract has been fulfilled,” he says. Lovecraft has a very strange way of talking. He speaks as little as possible and formally so. Sometimes it feels as though he is speaking in code though.
“Does this contract have to do with you not being human?”, you bite your lip as you throw the question out. This isn’t a subject you’ve touched on again.
“Yes”
“If you’re not human then what are you?”
“I’m not sure what humans would call me”, he pauses before standing up. The breeze catches onto his hair causing it to flutter around him. He faces you with his back to the sea and watches with a smoldering gaze, “Would you like to see.”
You nod. You do not wish to use words fearing that the nervousness you feel would reveal itself. It’s not exactly that you’re scared of him. If anything, you are more scared that your reaction may scare him. He has never been quite so vulnerable.
Slowly, his figure changes. His arms take on a green hue and begin to elongate. His neck straightens up and his eyes sink into his head. While he may have been tall before, nothing could quite prepare you for the creature he’s become. A mass of tentacles of an indescribable horror.
And you simply sit and stare. He does not remain like this for long though. Almost as though he is frightened that you may be scared, his figure shifts back to his original form.
You weren’t entirely sure what you were expecting. But his true matches the mark on your wrist exactly. You approach him but he seems wary. Perhaps, in the past his real form has frightened many people.
You stop and watch him instead. This is the same man who brings you chocolate ice cream every week and then eats it all. Will nap the entire day before waking up and going to dinner with you. Will sleep through an entire movie with his head in your lap while you slip your fingers through his hair. You don’t think you could ever be scared of him.
“Are you scared?”
You shake your head as you step in front of him. “I think you look cool.”
He gives you an incredulous look while holding up his arm which slips into his other form by the turn of his wrist. Your hand gravitates toward it and you run a finger over the length. It’s smooth.
“I really do”, you say and cup his cheeks into your hand. It’s a bit of a stretch up but his look of surprise is precious. “It’s amazing, because it’s you.”
______ (18+)
The Door slams open as Lovecraft drags you into your bedroom. He doesn’t bother to shut the door behind you as he lifts you up and drops you onto the bed. You land heavily and bounce a little. Lovecraft eyes you as he slips his tie and coat off. You feel like a rabbit caught in a trap.
He sheds his shirt off as well but before his hand reaches his belt, he stops.
“You do it.”
A man of little words but infinite power. You nod and slip your loose hair behind your ears. You crawl to the edge of the bed and slip your finger into one of his belt loops, tugging him forward. You lick your lips and decide to make a bold move. He watches you with curious eyes and a heated gaze as you tug him even closer. With one hand you swiftly unbutton his pants but lean forward and bite onto his zipper.
You glance upwards through your eyelashes as you slowly move downwards. The sound of the zipper feels impossibly loud in the silent room, Lovecraft feels impossibly still beneath you. With his black pants moved to the side you flatten your tongue against his clothed cock. Lovecraft moans in surprise and slips his fingers into your hair. He doesn’t tug, simply hovers and suddenly it occurs to you that perhaps this is new territory for him.
You slip his half hard cock out of his underwear and run your tongue over the shaft but he quickly pulls you away by your hair.
“You don’t have to do that.”
You lick your lips and send him a wink, before leaning forward again and slipping the head into your mouth and sucking.Your tongue swirls around his cockhead. He groans.
He twitches in your mouth but once again he pulls you back by your hair, leans down and kisses you roughly. His movements feel desperate as he devours you. He pushes you back onto the bed and begins to strip off your clothes.
His long fingers slide everything off and even snaps a few threads in your shirt. You’re left in nothing but your underwear.
One hand traces from your jawline, through the valley of your breasts and slips even lower to hook into your underwear before tearing it off with one swift tug.
“You are looking very pretty for me.”
“Who says it’s for you”, you shoot back.
He smirks. His deep purple eyes penetrate you and he pushes you onto your back. His arms cage you in as he hovers over you. You shrink back into the bed.
“Oh”, he says, his hair falling over his shoulder and brushing against your naked skin. You shiver at the touch but he dips his head down and grazes his teeth against your earlobe before whispering, “you don’t want to look pretty for me?”
“Perhaps I’m looking pretty for men.”
His eyes flash dangerously. “Oh, my sweet, let me show you why other boys cannot compare.”
Fuck, for someone whos diving into new territory, he certainly knows how to set you on fire.
He dives for your neck and licks a line from your collarbone to your jawline.
“Sweet.”
He nips at the skin of your neck before finally moving down to your breasts where he suckles each one into his mouth. His other hand slips between your thighs and he begins to rub your clit. He reaches further down and coats his hand in your slick. He chuckles before breathing against your ear, “You’re so wet.”
You gasp out as his finger slips into you, it’s so long and so cold that the sudden intrusion has you jerk your hips away. But he grabs your hips roughly with his other hand and pins you down onto the bed.
“Don’t tease me”, you whine.
He smiles, “I’m preparing you.”
He stretches you out nicely. All the while he alternates between giving you soft pecks and kisses and devouring your breasts. You keen and whine beneath him as he touches every part of you in the most exciting ways.
Suddenly he grasps his cock, dripping with precum, and gives it a few pumps while reaching into his back pocket for a condom packet. He brings it to his lips and rips open the packet with his teeth. His eyes do not leave yours as he slips the condom on. He lines himself up with your sloppy entrance. He doesn’t move further but instead leans over you more to cradle you into his arms. With a soft peck to your forehead he asks, “Are you ready?”
You kiss him flush on the lips in silent consent. He still doesn’t move so you pull away and whisper into his ear, “Fuck Me”
He chuckles before pushing his cock to your entrance. It’s big. It’s very big and you whine a little as the head pops in. He thrusts back and forth, rubbing you raw while he places little kisses on your collarbone. You mewl on the bed as your nails begin to dig into his back. It feels so good but he’s so big. You are so full.
Finally he bottoms out and groans. “Forgive me.”
He pushes back before slamming back into you. You cry out as he begins his brutal pace. Harsh slapping sounds fill the room as he groans into your ear over and over again. He bites down onto your shoulder as you both finish. He pulls out and throws the condom away. He’s barely drenched in sweat but his hair is plastered to his face. He brushes it away.
“Still thinking of other boys?” he muses with his deep husky voice.
“Like anyone can compare”, you say.
He hums in approval as he flips you on your stomach. You shoot him a confused look as he reaches for a pillow and slides it beneath your hips. Once again, his large build appears above you, another condom packet at his teeth.
Summary:You have been paired up with Osamu Dazai to smoke out drug dealers but things quickly take a turn for the worst and Dazai is injured.
Warnings:FLUFF, so nothing hectic but it does get a little steamy in the end. Mild Swearing.
Word Count: 2931
A/N:This took long to write and it is a lot longer than my usual work but it is cute and I feel very alone now. Also to those who write Dazai, how do you do it??
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A drug bust. A simple drug bust.
A group of thugs were illegally selling the stuff to some of the local gangs and it is being redistributed to some of the high school and college kids around the area.
Find them. Find the Stash. Arrest them. Confiscate the stash. No more drugs circulating around schools.
It’s honestly a small request for the agency which often deals in much larger cases so you were nominated to investigate it. You’re relatively new and the experience would be really good for you.
Thus, you were paired with Osamu Dazai. According to Kunikida, he could use the fresh air.
You spare a glance out the window and take note of the setting sun. The light casts deep dancing shadows across the walls. The air feels cold and wet as you take careful steps across the damp bricks. You and Dazai had left the Agency in the early morning and it’s already rapidly approaching evening. Ranpo said we’d be finished by lunch.
A simple Drug Bust. What a joke.
You pad lightly down the dingy hallway. Each deliberate step is cushioned by the moss that appears to have rooted itself on the bricks. The stench is suffocating at best. Dazai had gone off on his own as soon as you stepped inside the dilapidated building. He didn’t explain much, just said that he was going left and you should go right, and that you needed to wait by the east wing. Then he sauntered off leaving you alone.
Asshole
You come across a fork and debate if you should turn left or right. Two pairs of footsteps sound off at the end of the hall on the left. Two people. One pair sounds heavy and reverberates against the walls while the second almost scuffles along with the first. You reach for the gun at your belt. The weight of it resting against your hand gives you a feeling of comfort.
Two men step out from the end of the hallway. You slink back further and cover yourself in shadows. You hope they are enough to cover you completely. A man with a crew cut has his hand wrapped around the other’s arm as he appears to half lead half drag the man across the floor. You’re too far to make out his expression but the stark white of his face lets you know that he’s absolutely terrified. On closer inspection you can see that his other hand is bent at an odd angle. Perhaps, you and Dazai were not the only ones investigating the place. Assuming that Dazai is actually investigating and not lounging around somewhere while you did all the work.
The man opens a side door and yanks the smaller man into the room before following suit. The world has become deathly still once again. Not a sound to be heard. They’re the first two people you’ve seen since entering this damned place. After a minute of silence you emerge from your corner and creep down the hallway. Dazai’s instructions pop back into your head and you hesitate.
They may kill the cop.
Pushing Dazai’s words to the side, you stride forward and give chase.
___
You slip into the room and crouch behind a broken conveyor belt. You slip the gun off your belt and into your hands. Show time.
“Boss, I found this idiot sneaking ‘round back”, the bigger man says. A man steps out of the shadows dressed in a white lab coat and cocky grin. The ringleader walks forward with an air of arrogance, each step sounds deliberate and confident. He has dark eyes and long shoulder length hair. You can’t help but think he has very handsome foreign features.
“Is he a cop?” the leader asks. The large man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a badge and presents it.
“That’s the second one today”, he frowns as he carefully inspects the badge. His long hair falls in gentle waves around his face as he peers down. He then waves a dismissive hand, a frown gracing his handsome features, “The other one is being pursued as we speak. Once he’s been handled we’ll leave. Gather your men and tell them to inspect the surrounding area.”, he turns his attention to the man kneeling on the ground, “Asahi, was it? Tell me, who did you come with?”
Asahi pauses. “No one”
The leader smirks and waves his hand towards his subordinate who swiftly grab Asahi. Taking his remaining good arm in his hands, he twists it. Asahi cries out. The leader simply smiles coldly before he adjusts his glasses for dramatic effect.
“Who did you come with?”
Your mouth goes dry. Where’s Dazai when you need him? Is he the other cop being pursued? Step in now or wait?
The man in the lab coat begins to circle around Asahi who has said nothing but whimpers in pain instead. The leader steps in front of your hiding place with his back turned towards you, still facing the cop. You make a decision. Dazai isn’t here to help you or hold your hand. You grab onto your gun more firmly, you begin to rise, ready to step out.
The doors at the other end of the room fly open. The swing against the walls with a loud bang and you immediately duck back down. Heart in your throat. Who the fuck? Two men step forward both escorting the same man across the floor. He puts up no fight and simply allows himself to be dragged into the room. Hands tied behind his back. They force him into a kneeling position. However, he remains unbothered as a lazy smile graces his features.
Dazai.
This fucking idiot.
Four men. Two hostages. And You are only equipped with a gun.
“Found the other cop.”
Dazai grins, “I’m not a cop.”
Like they care
The man in the lab coat steps forward, ignoring Asahi who’s still kneeling in the other man’s hold and instead approaches Dazai. Dazai’s posture is calm as he lazily scans his environment. His eyes briefly roam over your position.
He says, “I believe I’ve arrived just in time.”
You clutch your gun tighter. Dazai never discussed anything beforehand and you can only think that surely none of this is going right.
An explosion sounds off in the distance and the building shakes. Dazai makes a face of confusion but the glint in his eyes speaks of mischief, “That is exceedingly unusual.”
A smile curls over your lips. Guess he wasn’t lazing around after all. The man in the coat finally drops his cocky grin. All traces of arrogance vanishes. He turns to his subordinates. “Go! Move! Find whatever worms have stumbled across our hideout. Kill anyone you don’t recognize. Take whatever leftover stock you can find and leave”, he shouts.
He spins towards the man still holding the cop, who’s gone completely white from fright. “Not you. You’re going to get me out of here safely. You can dispose of the two cops.”
The man nods and reaches into his jacket. Absolutely not. Somehow having Dazai in the room fuels you with confidence. You waste no time before you spring out of your hiding place. You charge towards the larger man who pauses in surprise as you suddenly rush in front of him. Before he can equip his gun you slam yours into his temple. He stumbles backwards but gathers himself quickly. He charges forward but every painstaking lesson with Fukuzawa flashes before your eyes. Before anyone can react the man has already landed heavily on his back, hands cuffed together.
“Now who the fuck are you?”
You turn towards the man in the lab coat. The boss no longer looks as in control as he did a few minutes ago. He pulls out a gun and points it towards Dazai who narrows his eyes at him before he flashes you a look of warning.
“How many of you are there?!” He demands.
You look around you and pull a face of mock concentration. “I believe there’s three of us here.”
“FUCK YOU!” He takes a step towards Dazai and jams the gun into the back of Dazai’s head. The gun in your own hands feels heavier.
“How many are you?”, he says, voice like steel.
“Drop your gun and I’ll tell you.”
“Only if you drop yours first. Or would you like to see who has the faster trigger finger.?”
You, would in fact, not like to find out. Your earlier confidence begins to fade away. You drop your gun on the floor. He doesn’t budge and simply glares at you and then the gun. You understand and kick the gun forward, far enough so that it’s out of your reach. The man smiles in a way that makes you feel as though he is unhinged. Perhaps, he is.
He steps away from Dazai and towards your gun. He kicks it away so that it clatters against one of the pieces of old equipment. Suddenly, Dazai who has been complacent this whole time stands up and rushes towards him. The ropes around his wrist seem to have disappeared. He leaps forward and the man spins around and fires off gunshots, maybe eight? Panic seizes you and you let out a cry of panic as you spring forward. The leader turns to you with wild eyes but only empty clicks sound from his gun. You immediately grab him and force him to the ground. You hastily cuff him before looking up for Dazai.
“Dazai!” you shout. You leave the man on the ground and run towards him. Dazai stands casually with a smile on his face but his right hand touches his shoulder.
“That was close”, he comments drily as he moves his hand away and inspects the blood. “Just a scratch.”
He grins at you and then walks towards the cop on the floor. “I imagine you arrived alone. Not a very smart move on your part.”
Asahi nods, “Thank You, I’ll call back up and arrest them.”
Dazai turns away from him and heads for the door, “No need. I’ve already called in my own back up. Y/n, Kunikida arrived on scene roughly five minutes ago with Tanizaki and Atsushi.”
You nod silently. He’s acting so calm. And true to his word, the others had shown up with the police in tow. The situation was neatly resolved and you handed over your findings to them. By the time the whole situation was completely resolved, night had descended onto Yokohama and the breeze was chilling.
____________________
“Dazai, what was that?” you ask.
Both of you had left earlier than the others and had met up at the agency. The clock steadily ticks towards 10pm. Your movements feel sluggish but you are wide awake. The events flash behind your eyes on loop. The repetitive gunshots firing in your ears. Dazai looks over at you with a confused look. “A drug bust?”
“Not that, why did you run at him? He had a gun in his hand, he could’ve killed you. Heck, you already got injured. Why would you suddenly rush him like that?”
Dazai simply shrugged. “I knew he wasn’t going to actually hit anything fatal. He could barely hold the gun properly. He wouldn’t have killed me even if I was standing right in front of him with a target between my eyes”
“Don’t be reckless, Dazai.”
“Speaking of “reckless”, why were you there?” I told you to head to the east side of the building and yet you were prancing about the headquarters right into his hands. Romanoff is a dangerous man, he would’ve killed you immediately. Also, I do believe you charged a villain with a gun today.”
Romanoff? Where was this information earlier?
“Nothing even happened on the east side, no one was there, why does it even matter. And don’t you dare compare what you did to what I did. The difference, Dazai, is that that man didn’t have his gun in his hand yet and I did. The difference is also that Yosano can heal whatever injury I walk out with while her gift will never work on you.”
“She can’t fix a corpse”, he seethes at you. You pause. Your face has gone completely red and you can’t believe you’re even arguing with this intolerable man. He’s already been hurt, how much more does he want?
“No”, you eye him carefully. This man is a genius. Out of all your joking and sniping at him, you’ve seen him work. You’ve seen him come up with incredible plans and predict the enemies movement as if they were all nothing but pawns on his chessboard. So why?
“Why did you want me on the east side of the building?” you ask. “When the police were inspecting, there was nothing there. No one was there.”
Dazai says nothing. For a second the only thing that can be heard are your shallow breaths.
“Why did you send me away? Were you going to handle it by yourself?”
Dazai lets out a dry huff of laughter. “You think too much. I thought the ringleader would try and escape that way and then you would’ve been able to catch them off guard.”
You step towards him “But all of the vehicles were on the right, that’s what you blew up.”
“Most leaders will have a second escape route if they’re smart.”
“No one was there, Dazai.”
You walk towards him and he doesn’t move, but only continues to smile with eyes that hide a million little secrets. Perhaps if you stare at them long enough, you will finally unlock hissecrets.
Finally you stand in front of him and reach a hand to grasp the corner of his jacket as he moves back. The material is surprisingly soft in your hands. You stare up at him and his warm eyes meet yours, for once it feels as though a layer of his armour has been stripped away.
“Don’t run away.” you whisper, he’s so close that you fear a harsher sound may break him. That he may recoil once again back into his shell and shut you off again.
He glances away from you and chuckles.
“I’m not made from drywall", you joke lightly, “I can support you, you don’t have to hide me in a corner.”
He doesn’t face you when he responds, “I’m well aware, Little miss detective.”
“I don’t think you are”, you chuckle. You release his coat and reach up to cup his face in your hands. You force him to look at you. Your light smile disappears when you meet his eyes. They are burning. His eyes darken as he watches you, the next layer of armour stripping away when he says, “That was really dangerous, what you did today.”
“Not as dangerous as what you did, I hear they were chasing you all over the place.”
He frowns, “It’s different when I do it.”
“I don’t think so.”
He huffs and leans forward. His ice cold hands reach for you as he cradles your face in his hands. Oddly enough, the cold feels good against your burning cheeks. He brings you closer to him as he leans down towards you.
“You are so frustrating.”
You narrow your eyes at him and playfully frown. “Me? What about you and your vague ass instructions, you know, maybe if you-”
Soft lips press against your own. He steals your breath away along with every last one of your words. His hand that was cradling your face so gently has slipped around your waist as he pushes you flush against him. He’s cold. He’s so cold and you wrap your arms around him. He doesn’t always have to be cold. He doesn’t always have to be alone.
You finally pull away and gasp for air. His eyes burn with intense emotions and he immediately begins kissing your jaw. He nips at your neck before sucking the skin aggressively. His tongue rolls out his mouth as he laps at the area before he moves on to the next. You burn. A shiver runs down your spine and you want him closer. You want to dissolve and drown in him. It’s been so long since you’ve felt like this. His teasing smirks and dry comments have annoyed you to no end and yet he’s here with you against the wall with his long slender finger digging into your hips in the most intoxicating way. You wish for nothing more than for this man to devour you whole. Your hands have tangled into his hair as you tug gently. He groans against your neck and his hand moves further down to grab your thigh rubbing small circles.
“Don’t tease me”, he whispers as his teeth graze your ear.
Summary: Dazai has been weirdly absent from the Agency the whole week. One night, after working late you notice that the light in his room is on. But, he doesn’t seem to be answering you.
Warnings:Mentions of Suicide. Otherwise this is purely a Fluff Fic.
Word Count: 2 011
A/N: This would have been out earlier if it weren’t for two reasons. 1) Dazai is a very complex character to write.( I sincerely hope that I have done him Justice) 2) my computer shut down before posting and nothing was saved. But otherwise Please enjoy!!
Important to note: This occurs between Season 2 and 3. In other words it’s after the Guild arc but before the Cannibalism arc. NO Season 3 Spoilers.
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The night air is icy. A chilling breeze swept through the area and brushed across your skin as you walked home from the Agency building. Today, you worked overtime trying to piece together information from your latest case. Unfortunately you’re not as observant as Dazai or Ranpo who simply glance at a crime scene and pull out handcuffs. Speaking of Dazai, he took the day off unannounced, again. In fact, the whole week he’s been mostly absent, more than usual. Kunikida is going to blow a gasket soon.
You walk quickly towards the Agency’s dorms, enjoying the night air but wanting to get inside as soon as possible. The chill is almost unbearable and the breeze feels piercing. You simply can’t wait to curl up in a blanket with a hot cup of hot chocolate. With this idea in mind you pass by the 24/7 market and purchase two muffins for yourself. With the late night treats in hand you head home and before you know it you’re ready to climb the stairs of the dorms to get to your room. But, suddenly you pause. You take a step back and look down the row of rooms to the very thing that has caught your eye. The last room had a bit of light peeking out of the window. It belongs to Dazai.
You haven’t seen him for most of the week and seeing him up so late is somewhat surprising. Although, it’s not the fact that he’s awake but rather that he’s there at all. Dazai has been like a ghost the past week, impossible to get a hold of and almost nonexistent. Often, his disappearing act results in no one able to find him at all but he’s right over there.
You turn on your heel and head towards the door. What are you going to say? What’s the plan of action? God knows. You just want to see him. Perhaps you could just ask where he’s been the whole week? The week has been impossibly dull without him. Having Dazai at the office normally creates it’s own firework show with his firecracker personality, but he’s surprisingly dependable and you’ve missed him greatly.
You knock on the door twice. Two quick raps that feel deafening in the late night.
Silence.
Not a peak behind the door. You knock again and call out, “Dazai, it’s me.”
Nothing greets you back.
Perhaps, if you were Kunikida you could understand why he wouldn’t want to talk to you but you genuinely feel as though you’ve become close. He’s almost always goofing around but you’ve worked a few cases with him and are awed by his intelligence and the recent intervention with the Guild unearthed a lot of his past. You feel as though you’ve finally seen how complex he truly is. Finding out that he was once part of the Port Mafia was surprising but it also explained a lot of his actions. He revealed a lot to the agency with the air of nonchalance but you knew that it probably didn’t sit comfortably with him to dig up old unpleasant memories. Back then, you’d felt as though a lot of missing puzzle pieces had finally fallen in front of you.
“So… the Port Mafia huh?” you had called out to him. You were alone at the time, both sorting through case files in the office. The words came up because you were curious, no one else had quite spoken to him about it.
“Ahhhh, I can tell you many stories if you like, but I am afraid that they are not very pleasant to the ear.”
You smile at him and shake your head. He seems to have misunderstood your intentions.
“No, that’s not it, I’m just thinking that it makes sense in a weird way. You were never someone they just picked off the street.”, you said and turned to face him. “It’s okay Dazai, truthfully, your past doesn’t matter all that much as long as you’re here looking at a better future.”
He had said nothing, and you didn’t push for him to say anything at all either. You had simply worked in silence until the others had returned. The words were simple but you felt that it needed to be said. You cannot imagine what it must feel like to have a messy past but truly the Agency members would never hold it against him. You felt the need to reassure him.
Your relationship together had always been full of witty banter and flirty comments but after the ordeal, you felt as though he’s become more genuine and open with you. You two, like peas in a pod when working on a case, able to silently communicate and send meaningful glances at one another. Many times you thought to yourself that you would both divulge in a private romance.
But, he always seems to draw away from you at the last second.
Now you stand in front of his door met by absolute silence and you’re feeling somewhat frantic. You look down at your purchased treats and try a different tactic.
“I have Muffins.”
I’m literally putting my food on the line you asshole, you think to yourself. Let me in, it’s freezing.
After another few minutes of silence, he still hasn’t responded. You have also come to the decision that perhaps the muffins aren’t too great a loss anyway. After all, he probably hasn’t been eating. You reach for your bag, wondering if you should attempt to break in with your lock picking kit that you carry around. A precautionary measure. Suddenly, it hits you: Dazai is always going on about suicide this and suicide that. A shiver of fear crawls through you.
Screw it. He can get mad at you later.
You reach for the door and quickly fiddle with the lock only to find that it’s already unlocked.
You careless bastard. You better not be dead.
You quickly wing open the door and step inside. You desperately search the room. The room is mostly dark and the only light source is a desk lamp. At the desk, he’s slouched unconscious. A pen loosely sits in his one hand that is propped up slightly, hanging awkwardly over his head. The room is freezing.
You rush forward and reach for him, he’s ice cold. Your heart sinks like a stone. And tears of panic have begun to well up. He wouldn’t do this. He couldn’t possibly.
Please Dazai, don’t leave me.
You’re on the verge of tears when you gently place a hand on the lone bandaged wrist lying on the table and find a very steady pulse, but his hands are still bitterly cold. You swallow down the lump in your throat and realize that he’s simply asleep and simply very cold. You attempt to calm yourself. He’s alive. You take a look at his desk and notice the dozens of sheets of paper, each one covered in his messy handwriting. You pick up one that he isn’t lying on and attempt to decipher it. While most words are hard to make out, you pick out a few key words and notice that it has to do with the Port Mafia. You skim through a different page and are surprised to find a Russian name.
Fyodor Dostoevsky.
Sleeping in the cold is bad, it will give you nightmares, you think and walk further into his dorm to the cupboard with extra blankets and supplies that’s standard for every living space. You grab a thick blanket and walk back to him. As quietly as you can, you remove the pencil from his hand and place the blanket over his shoulders.
Suddenly, ice cold fingers shoot forward and curl around your wrist as Dazai’s eyes fly open. The atmosphere shifts immediately. Alarm bells ring in your head. Tension floods the room and blazing foggy eyes land on you. A chill runs down your spine that has nothing to do with the weather. You immediately crouch down to make yourself less threatening as his grip tightens.
“It’s me! It’s me!” you whisper-shouted. The walls are thin in this place and you don’t want to draw attention by shouting but a pained whimper manages to slip out of your mouth. His grip is deadly.
His eyes clear up and he immediately releases your hand. He looks at you sitting on the floor at his side rubbing your wrist with an annoyed expression and then glances at the blanket that had slipped off his shoulders slightly. A look of surprise briefly washes over his face before he reverts back to a seemingly neutral expression.
“What are you doing here?” he asks but lacks the usual tone of mischief that generally accompanies anything he says. As though he’s forgotten to place his invisible mask back onto his face. “Not that I am upset, it is always a pleasure to see you. Although I didn’t expect to find you sneaking around my room.”
His sly expression slowly returns to his face but his eyes still appear to be hazy. Honestly, he looks rather sexy right now especially with his tousled hair.
“I brought food. Also you weren’t at the Agency today,” you say. “And your door was unlocked, I’ll have you know, that’s very dangerous. A killer could easily sneak in here”
You brush off the awkward atmosphere as smoothly as you can because even you are aware that it’s a bit weird to break into his room at 11 ‘o’ clock at night with food.
He shrugs with an amused smile brushing over his features.
You let out an awkward cough before gesturing to all the papers strewn across his desk.
“What is all this? I’ve never seen you do any actual office work before”, you joke.
“Oh this? It’s nothing. Just wondering where my next suicide attempt should be. Lots of research this time, all I need now is a beautiful fair maiden” He throws you a playful glance towards the end. But, the tone of playful bachelor is ruined by the slur of sleep.
Liar
Dazai has always been receptive to emotions and expressions and you are very much an open book to him. He knows fair and well that you think he’s lying but says nothing more on the subject. You are also a book that can take a hint and so you say nothing on the matter. Seeing how tired he is you decide that it’s probably best to leave. He gets little sleep as it is, judging by the dark circles under his eyes.
“You should sleep, I’ll go now but I brought two muffins. Which one do you want? Chocolate or Blue-”, you stop suddenly and look down at the slender fingers latched around your wrist.
“You don’t have to leave,” he says.
Your heart trips over his words and slams against your chest. His words are sweet like honey. Your breath gets caught in your throat as he gently tugs you towards his desk. Messy hair coupled with his intensely dark eyes following you, has you feeling all kinds of things.
What are you saying to me with such an expression
“Come here.”
He moves the papers to the side and gestures for you to sit on it. You hop onto the desk without much issue.
“I’ve missed you this week,” he smiles mischievously.
“Maybe you wouldn’t miss me so much if you actually came to work.”
He chuckles slightly at this and you smile. This position feels weirdly intimate, with him so close sitting on the chair while you’re on the desk. The room is somewhat dark and his face is half discarded in the shadows. But his rich brown eyes are bright in the dark. The atmosphere may almost be mistaken as romantic but you quickly push that thought aside. You clear your throat slightly and look away from him terrified that his eyes will swallow you whole. You reach for the bag of food. “Dazai, do you want Chocolate or-”
The feeling of two cold arms wrapping around your waist cuts you off. Surprised, you glance back at him to find that he’s much closer than before. He rests his head in your lap. He nuzzles your thigh. Your face flushes red.
“Y/N, you are right, I am much too tired ,” he mumbles and almost as an afterthought he adds, “ and cold. Just stay here for a little bit longer.” His head sits heavy and unmoving in your lap, turned to the side, facing away from the light of the desk lamp. His eyelids flutter shut and the blanket seems to fall even further down his shoulders.
“Wake me up in 30 minutes.”
He says nothing else and appears to drift off into a deep sleep. You reach for the blanket as slowly as you can without disturbing him you readjust it to cover him completely with only his head sticking out as he rests peacefully in your lap.
“Okay,” you whisper.
Your hand reaches for his head and ever so softly, it brushes against the tips of his hair. You become more bold, confident that he is sleeping based on his shallow, even breaths. Lightly, you begin to sift through his hair, playing with the strands and caressing his head. You allow the soft strands of his hair to slip through your fingers with each stroke. His hair is smooth to the touch and has a pleasant feel. As you continue gently caressing his head, you look around again at the sheets of paper. Each one is covered in messy handwriting and arrows linking seemingly random bits of information.
You’ve been playing detective with Dazai for a long enough time to know that he’s planning something and suddenly the boy in your arms feels even more precious to you. Because in this moment you understand that a storm is brewing on the horizon and he’s possibly the only one who can smell the scent of rain on the wind. He is carrying a burden alone. He is placing the safety of the Agency above his own and your heart warms towards him.
You look down at the exhausted man.
He was once the Devil’s prodigy but now he is the Agency’s Guardian Angel.
