Everyone who uses that “well 90% of rape is committed by men,” bullshit is forgetting that female rapists are rarely reported because male rape victims aren’t taken seriously and are made fun of and when they actually are reported it’s RARELY taken seriously and goes through court.
Women rape plenty. You’re not pure. You’re not the victim. Anyone, ANYONE, can be a victim, regardless of gender.
Women also rape other women, but a lot of people either outright ignore it, thinking that it’s “not real rape,” or they try to silence survivors because they think that reporting on female-on-female sexual abuse is homophobic.
Study after study has shown that lesbian relationships have the highest levels of abuse per capita. This can’t be ignored any longer.
I had no idea. That’s awful.
Lgbt people aren’t innocent and incapable of being abusive or rapists. f/f and m/m relationships aren’t inherently more pure and wholesome than m/f couples.
Rape isn’t a female issue caused by men and it’s FAR from exclusive to heterosexual couples.
I think the scariest thing that the whole “nomap” thing has made me realize is that non offending “undercover” pedophiles can be anywhere. And just because they aren’t actively touching and traumatizing children doesn’t mean they’re not doing anything wrong. But yourself in the mind of a parent with underage kids. Imagine just how many times they may have come into contact with a pedophile without your knowledge. At daycares, public pools, and other children filled places.
They may not be touching your kids, but that’s definitely not the only way they satisfy their craving. What about seeing young children in bikinis? Being able to have control over toddlers? Watching children in general? It’s terrifying to think how many people like that could be out there without our knowledge. It’s sick. Pedophiles are truly the scum of the earth.
I wonder how much shit I’ll get for this because surprisingly my last post on this topic received a lot of backlash. Who cares, free blocklist. Pedophiles and pedo apologists are not welcome here. Never have been and never will be.
I think the scariest thing that the whole “nomap” thing has made me realize is that non offending “undercover” pedophiles can be anywhere. And just because they aren’t actively touching and traumatizing children doesn’t mean they’re not doing anything wrong. But yourself in the mind of a parent with underage kids. Imagine just how many times they may have come into contact with a pedophile without your knowledge. At daycares, public pools, and other children filled places.
They may not be touching your kids, but that’s definitely not the only way they satisfy their craving. What about seeing young children in bikinis? Being able to have control over toddlers? Watching children in general? It’s terrifying to think how many people like that could be out there without our knowledge. It’s sick. Pedophiles are truly the scum of the earth.
so i usually dont do these kind of posts, i guess you could say its a call out of some sort? but i never liked that word, i prefer rather to just compile sources on WHY people would believe that a certain person is not truly as nice and understanding as they seem. consider this more of a psa post, detailing on whats going on with pazam on the sfm community, why so many people are against them.
Summary: [Canon divergence] Heisenberg revives Ethan after the latter’s heart gets ripped out by Miranda, and now he has him where he wants him; unable to refuse the new deal he’s offering him.
A/N: This chapter will be long and hard. Just like Heisenberg’s d-
~
Ethan woke to the sound of heavy boots echoing in the corridor outside. He tried to jolt away, realizing he didn’t have any space to move, his hands were tied directly on the bed frame.
Fuck! He couldn’t afford sleep now. He had to—
His breath caught in his chest when the door opened. Heisenberg came in, holding a small bundle wrapped in a blanket in his arms.
One single cooing sound came from her, and Ethan’s eyes were flooding with tears.
“Please,” he whispered, hands fruitlessly trying to reach for his daughter.
Heisenberg didn’t even make a move, yet the Soldats knew to leave them alone, even closing the door behind them. He looked down at Rose in his arms.
She was back. She was alive. “Please, Heisenberg,” Ethan said. “Let me see her.”
Heisenberg still had his glasses off, and Ethan was surprised to see he looked… pensive. Sad, even.
“I must admit,” Heisenberg said in a low voice, “despite how much you’ve angered me, that I admire what you’ve done for her.” He looked away. “What no-one did for me.”
Holy shit. Was he trying to make him feel sorry for him?!
Maybe that was the right moment. Ethan decided to try again. “Please. Just for one moment—let me hold her, please. I haven’t seen her all day, I was so worried for her… If you mean what you’re saying—”
Heisenberg chuckled. “Ah, no. I’m not that naïve, Winters.” He then turned to the side, walking through a door Ethan hadn’t noticed. Before Ethan could start unloading a train of swears and insults his way, he was back without Rose.
“You asshole!” Ethan stood up, despite the awkward position his chained hands forced on him. “Where did you take her?!”
Heisenberg sighed, and with a move of his hand the handcuffs pulled apart; Ethan’s free hand swayed up then down to the other side of the bed, forcing him to fall on his ass as now both cuffs were restrained to each edge of the metal frame.
Ethan groaned, feeling more and more desperate with every passing second. “What did you do to her?!”
“Relax. You need to let your body get used to the new heart. Don’t force it through such tension.”
“What the fuck…” Ethan paused, then took a deep breath. “Just get on with it. You dragged me in here and brought me back. So just tell me what you want from me.”
“So eager,” Heisenberg said, taking a few steps toward him.
“You’re not giving me any other choice.”
“Ah, well, I gave you one. Multiple chances to make the right one, in fact.”
Ethan sighed audibly. Heisenberg still thought his ‘offer’ was such the catch of the year. “You say I angered you? I’m tired of yourconstant talking, Heisenberg. Just get to the point.”
“Fine, fine, alright.” He stepped a little closer, then knelt down to Ethan’s level. He looked at him, expression turning serious. “You understand I can’t let either Rose or you go.”
No, he didn’t understand. He didn’t have any time for Heisenberg’s drama and villain origin story.
“So what? You’re gonna keep us here forever?” The words came out fast, but he realized that, in his condition, forever may not be much of an exaggeration—for him, at least.
“Despite the rough conditions of my factory, your body can survive here. You’ve proven that already. Under my protection, you won’t even need your weapons.”
“Protection? Why the hell would you protect me? Why would I trust you would?”
“I have a deal to offer you.”
Ethan snorted. Heisenberg’s definition of ‘deal’ was more fucked up than he could ever realize.
“You tell me no again, and I keep you prisoner in a dark, cold cell in the basement. No bathroom, and only the essential food you need to survive. Seeing as you’re all mold, your body won’t mind consuming only moldy food. And you won’t see Rose again. Or, you tell me yes, and you have this room, a bathroom to yourself, fresh food, and the chance to see Rose as often as you want.”
“Tempting,” Ethan said, voice dripping with sarcasm.
Heisenberg smiled, and brought himself just a little closer.
Ethan leaned back against the bed frame. “To what, exactly, am I to say yes or no?” he asked.
Heisenberg looked between Ethan’s eyes. A shiver went down Ethan’s spine as he came even closer, and Ethan realized he had no more room to move away.
“I want you to give yourself to me,” Heisenberg said.
There was so much silence, the very sound that brought Ethan back to reality was the sound of his own eyes blinking.
A short breath left his lungs; he was almost panting in shock. “You… you want me to…” he swallowed hard. “… submit to you?”
“Don’t you worry, I can be gentle.” He was now too close, his breath smelling of thick smoke and machine oil. His hand rose, thumb floating millimeters away from Ethan’s cheek. “Unless you actually want it rough, no judgment here.”
Ethan shook his head in shock, realizing too late the movement would cause Heisenberg’s fingers to actually touch his cheek. He recoiled his head back, not that he had much space to. “This is… crazy, you can’t—”
He was cut off by Heisenberg suddenly moving, still smiling, and sliding his hand under Ethan’s shirt. His cold, rough, bare hand was sliding up Ethan’s chest-
A grunt left him as his body shook on its own. “Don’t touch me,” he said in a breathy voice.
Heisenberg brought his face closer, but withdrew the hand. Ethan’s relief didn’t last long, as immediately Heisenberg said, “You’re telling me you’re saying no?”
As if on cue, Ethan heard Rose’s cries from the other room. He turned his head to look at the closed door.
“Rose!” he shouted, hoping she’d hear him. He turned to Heisenberg. “What are you doing to her?! Let me see her!”
“Ah, that fire,” his smile widened. “She’s scared, probably. She’s all alone in there.”
“Let me see her, first.”
He just kept looking at him, smiling.
“Fuck, Heisenberg! You can’t do this! You just—you just said you admirewhat I’ve done, and now you ask this of me? You’re—you’re asking me to—”
“That’s my admiration, Winters,” he said coolly. “Consider it an appreciation, that I’m offering to be gentle.”
“Appreciation,” Ethan said, trying his damnedest to not allow Rose’s cries to drive him insane with worry. “Do you know, even just one word, whose meaning to you isn’t fucked up?”
Heisenberg was silent.
“A deal, then,” Ethan said, voice raising in pitch out of terror. How was he even speaking straight right now? “A deal has room for negotiation. Let me negotiate.”
“Of course, Ethan. What position do you prefer? Any preference in lubes?”
Ethan laughed; his whole body shook in nervous laughter. He hadn’t had hysterics in almost a year, after one very, very bad case of a flashback, and he could feel the beginnings of one now starting down in his stomach. He bit down on his lip. “This is fucking crazy.”
“It’s quite simple, actually. Let me fuck you, and you’ll be treated nicely. Refuse, and you’ll get locked up, never to see Rose again.”
His daughter’s name on his lips filled Ethan’s chest with rage, weak as it was with the shock still apparent. “Just let me see her. Just once, I want to see she’s alright. Then I’ll answer you.”
“Oh, she’s more than alright. You think I’d bother bringing her here, if she hadn’t come out of the Megamycete intact?”
That mycete thing again.
Ethan was getting tired. Tired of everything, including the rollercoaster of emotions Heisenberg’s words were making him go through. And Rose was still crying. He sighed. “Can I pleasesee her? Just for a little?”
“No,” Heisenberg said definitively.
Tears filled Ethan’s eyes again. To think he’d been on the verge of feeling just a little sympathy for the man Heisenberg probably was, before Miranda. “If someone had tried to save you from Miranda,” he said, voice having gone weak, “would you have been okay, if someone else was asking this of them?”
Heisenberg’s smile dropped, his expression turning serious. “I will not harm your daughter. I only want her power. Miranda tainted my body.”
“You want to use her… and she’s just a baby. She doesn’t get any choice in all of this. How the hell can you not see that this isharming her?”
“She will not see it this way, once she’s grown up.”
Ethan’s tears fell. The thought of that monster raising his daughter… “You’re a sick motherfucker.”
“Ah!” He gave him a lopsided smile. “Mother-killer.”
Fire burnt inside him again. “Fuck yourself!” He struggled against his chains. “Fight me fair, you fucking coward!”
He kept trying to get free, to no avail, and Heisenberg was just watching him, waiting. The more Rose kept crying, the more confident Heisenberg looked.
He had Ethan where he wanted. And he knew what he’d go through for Rose’s sake.
It was just then that it hit him; that entry in Heisenberg’s diary.
Her father, Ethan, has a pretty interesting body himself.
Ethan had been too stressed from his fight with Sturm for those words to sink in then. Raw adrenaline coursing through his veins, he couldn’t have imagined Heisenberg could ever mean something like this. Though he probably also meant the mold thing, but still…
Ethan let out a dejected sigh, and Heisenberg’s smile widened. He knew. That bastard, he fucking knew.
He looked down. How could he ever voice those words? To voice his agreement to getting raped?
“Just let me see her, afterwards,” was all he could say.
A breathy laugh left Heisenberg, and Ethan felt a weak shiver through his entire body. He’d been running on adrenaline and pure spite the entire day, he was only now realizing how exhausted he was, and how much every part of his body hurt. Even if he had the choice to resist, he knew he wouldn’t have the strength to.
Heisenberg stood up, bringing Ethan’s cuffs with him.
Ethan groaned tiredly. Perhaps… would it be easier, better, if he just passed out?
The cuffs weren’t attached to anything. His arms fell limp to his sides as Heisenberg took Ethan’s jacket off him.
“You can work with me on this, can’t you? Don’t make me pull on those handcuffs.”
Ethan bit down on his lip. Heisenberg was now grabbing Ethan’s hoodie and pulling it over his head. Looking down on his torso, Jesus, the state of it… though he didn’t doubt that, aside from the stitched wound over his heart, there were no other wounds under all the caked blood.
“Hmm,” Heisenberg said, placing his fingers on Ethan’s stomach.
Ethan swallowed hard, clenching his hands into fists to stop himself from pushing him away. Especially when one finger toyed with the scar left from the stabbing hehad given him earlier that day. His breath caught in his throat, when with the corner of his eye he saw Heisenberg smile as he brushed his fingers through the hair on his chest.
Heisenberg started undoing Ethan’s belt, and a whimper left him. Heisenberg just gave him a calm look.
“Breathe, papa. It’s gonna be alright.”
He didn’t give him any more time. As soon as the belt was undone, he pulled Ethan’s pants and underwear down. Ethan curled in on himself.
“There’s no need to be ashamed,” Heisenberg said.
“Shut the fuck up,” Ethan managed in a weak voice. He either had no idea how little his ‘encouraging’ words helped, or he knew exactly what impact they were really having on him.
“Aw.” Then with a move of his hand, Ethan was flying backwards and onto the bed. The cuffs opened, then got secured on the bars of the headboard. He was shivering now, as Heisenberg took Ethan’s shoes and socks off and then removed his pants.
Ethan was nearly gasping for breath. His mind felt muddled as he watched Heisenberg simply stare at his naked, restrained form. As soon as he saw him start undressing himself, he turned his head to the side and pressed his face against his bicep.
Breathe in… Breathe out… Come on. Keep your head clear!
He gasped audibly when he felt the mattress between his legs shift. He turned to look as a naked Heisenberg started climbing, sliding his hands up Ethan’s legs. Without even thinking, Ethan tried to drag himself back, until his head found the headboard.
“Stay calm, Ethan. I promise, it doesn’t have to hurt at all.”
“Just s-shut up. D-Do what you h-have to do.” He was trembling. He couldn’t bear listening to him anymore.
“Tsk. I suppose that can be part of your negotiation.”
A drawer next to the bed opened, and a vial with a metal cap flew to Heisenberg’s hand. He opened it, and Ethan watched as he dropped a generous amount of lube on his hand, which he then moved to wrap around his member.
Ethan whimpered and threw his head back, unsure if watching the scene was more terrifying than not knowing what to expect when.
Heisenberg sighed deeply; Ethan resorted to only looking at his face, not that the expression of sick pleasure on it wasn’t enough to scare the shit out of him.
He did see Heisenberg’s hand move towards him. It still shocked him when he felt two slick fingers enter him. He groaned, clenching around the digits.
“Easy, easy there. I’m only getting started.”
Ethan bit down hard on his lip. His breath was so quick and short… before he knew it, he was seeing black spots—until Heisenberg brought his face much, much closer.
“You really haveto relax, now,” he said, gently placing his other hand on the side of Ethan’s face. “It’s for your own good.”
Ethan tried to speak, only to make short, pathetic whimpers. He didn’t even know what he was planning on saying.
Heisenberg caressed Ethan’s face, looking right into his eyes. “Remember why you’re doing this.” He removed his fingers and Ethan tensed even more. “After everything you went through today, I’m sure you can convince yourself that calming the fuck down is worth it.”
Worth it. Everything he’d done today… God, it felt like an eternity. He realized Rose was still crying, though more softly now. He wasn’t sure he’d heard her cry like this before…
A feeling of emptiness washed over him. In the short time she’d been in this world, she’d never been left alone, crying, for such a long time.
His body felt heavy, now too tired to even hyperventilate. He had to get this over with, so he could go to her and comfort her.
Appease the fucking monster. That was all that mattered.
With one final sigh, he sunk into the mattress. He was trying to look away, but his eye still caught the wide, satisfied grin on Heisenberg’s face.
It’s okay, Winters.
Heisenberg grabbed Ethan’s left leg and pushed it aside.
You can do it—
Other leg.
It can’t be worse than having that same leg chopped off with a fucking shovel—
It didn’t hurt as much as he’d imagined. Still, some pain was inevitable. He let out a long, shaky groan.
“Ugh, sweet heaven,” Heisenberg breathed, leaning over him. He thrust once, gently shushing Ethan after he grunted again. “It’s okay, it’s okay. I should’ve expected you’ve never had it like this before. Just relax.”
Relax…
“The more you tense up,” – he thrust again – “the more it’ll hurt. Lube can only do so much.”
Whimpers flowed through Ethan’s trembling lips. No, that was… that was too much.
Rose.
He sobbed, more in despair than in pain. He had to go through with it, and he would; but he couldn’t pretend anymore that it wasn’t ripping him apart.
He let himself go. He moved his head to the side, but Heisenberg grabbed it and gently moved it to face him.
“I want to look at your face,” he said, panting. “Why do you think I have you on your back?”
Ethan resorted to closing his eyes. Heisenberg wanted to look at him, didn’t mean he demanded Ethan look back.
Whatever emotion his face was betraying seemed to satisfy the other man. So Ethan stayed there, allowing tears to fall through his closed eyes and sobs to rock his body as Heisenberg moved inside him.
Amongst the chaos of emotions, it was Rose’s crying that shook him to the core.
I’m so sorry, sweetheart…
She was all alone in there…
I won’t be too long now…
He’d never heard her cry like this before…
I’m getting you out of there, I swearto you…
For one moment, he decided to open his eyes. Heisenberg was leaning over him, eyes half-closed in pleasure, probably not looking at anything.
How could he find it in himself, to do something like this while a baby cried, desperately, for someone to hold her?
Heisenberg grabbed at Ethan’s hips, moving them a bit and allowing him deeper access. Ethan shook, barely having the strength to make a sound.
“Shh, shh,” Heisenberg said. “It’s okay.”
“Gentle,” Ethan managed, barely believing himself, begging that monster for some mercy. “You said you’d be…”
Heisenberg groaned, but moved back a bit. He then looked at Ethan and smiledat him.
Ethan felt bile rise in his throat. In his position, swallowing it down made him nearly feel as if he was choking.
He closed his eyes again and tried to lose himself.
He couldn’t decide what was worse, his daughter’s wails or how Heisenberg was using his body; he managed to feel some surprise in how it felt easier to jump from one horrible sensation to the other, than to focus on only one.
He hoped Rose would just stop crying and fall asleep, and he detested himself for it.
If he thought about it, it was his fault. He should’ve known, should’ve realized that his body wasn’t normal. And now that Rose was here, he was responsible for her in more ways than most parents are for their children. He shouldn’t… he couldn’t hope for any less of that, even during a moment where he was offering his body for someone else to take advantage of… right?
Lost in his own miserable thoughts, he startled when he felt Heisenberg’s cum spill inside him. He shook whole, moaning miserably. He opened his eyes.
Heisenberg leaned further down. His chin rested on Ethan’s shoulder, his rough beard rubbing against his skin.
He felt his body stiff with shock, his eyes glued to the ceiling.
What the fuck, Winters. How did you expect it to end?!
Heisenberg slipped out, and Ethan squinted at how wet and dirtyeverything felt down there, and now against the front of his body as the sweating man all but lay on top of him.
Everything felt wrong. Even in the three years that Mia had been missing, Ethan had never wanted to touch someone else, or betouched by someone else. And now, he was choosing to allow a stranger to do what he wanted to him… a stranger who couldn’t care less whether Ethan lived or died – unless he could get his own sick pleasure from his body.
And Mia… it was like it was this exact moment that he felt drained, empty, from her loss. It had barely been a day since she’d been shot dead in front of him, and now he was doing this…
Heisenberg’s hot, satisfied breaths landed on Ethan’s slowly dirtier skin, and with cold dread he realized he could only hear those and his own gasps of shock.
Rose had stopped crying, and without even knowing why, that brought tears to his eyes.
“Please,” Ethan breathed. “My daughter…”
“I’m not done yet,” Heisenberg whispered.
“Jesus Christ. I’m begging you.”
Heisenberg fucking chuckled. “You would.” Then he raised his head a little to look at him.
“You said… I can see her as often as I want.” His voice was broken.
“As long as I am not busy with you. And I…” he brought his lips closer to Ethan’s left shoulder, “am still, quite busy with you now.” He then bit down, hard.
For the first time since being thrown on this bed, Ethan fought against his restraints. But it was pointless, and even making things worse, as Heisenberg kept biting and causing more of Ethan’s skin to break.
After a few seconds, he was done, and when he came back up and smiled, his teeth were bloody.
Ethan looked at his shoulder; he’d definitely had worse, especially today. “What the fuck was that?”
“That’s what you agreed on, Winters. I’ll do with you whatever I fucking want.”
He was now welcoming the rage. He didn’t have much hope for any positive feelings now, but he preferred at least a bit of variety over one continuous desperation. “You’re fucking sick. How is what you’re doing to me any better than what Miranda did to you?”
“Youcame to me. You could have taken my first deal. Or you could’ve run.”
“No,” Ethan said with a strength that surprised him. “I wouldn’t run. And you took advantage of that.”
“Oh.” His face settled into a more relaxed smile. “So this is the power of fatherly love, huh?”
Ethan felt a fire in his chest now. A variety indeed. “How would you know?” he spat at him.
For one second, Ethan thought he just had him. Then anger transformed Heisenberg’s features, as a deep breath landed on Ethan’s face. “That’s a very dangerous game to play, provoking the man whose mercy you’re at.”
“Mercy,” Ethan said, chuckling without emotion. “If only.”
He prepared himself for any physical impact. Instead, the other man simply forced a calm smile on his face, then got off of him.
“Let’s see where that gets you.”
There were a couple of seconds, just a tiny time window, where Ethan thought he would just leave, and his relief overwhelmed him to the point of tears. However, Heisenberg simply picked up a cigar from the nightstand next to the bed and lit it. He then leaned back, lying next to Ethan’s legs and bringing his own right next to Ethan’s chest.
It didn’t matter that minutes ago, those legs had been rubbing against his own; he wanted them as far away from him as possible. But of course, he was still restrained.
Heisenberg could boast all he wanted; just because Ethan was choosing this sacrifice, it didn’t mean he actually had any choice in the matter.
Still wary of him, Ethan kept his head a little high to watch him. Heisenberg was simply laying down, looking at the ceiling, and smoking his cigar, deeply so.
Ethan was not one for smoking, but he had seen how people smoked cigars; many small, short puffs at a time. Somehow, watching Heisenberg take full puffs of his own made him look even less human.
Heisenberg reached with his free hand and caressed Ethan’s leg. Ethan growled in disgust and threw his head back, fighting the urge to squirm as far away from him as possible. He clenched his hands into fists, trying to stay still as Heisenberg’s hand moved idly across his skin.
Ethan closed his eyes, focusing on keeping his breathing steady. He wasn’t even sure anymore, if it was fear or anger that was trying to make his breathing faster. Or both.
It was shock, though, that took it away when the other man’s hand reached his member and wrapped softly around it.
This time Ethan did try to move away, opening his eyes. “No.”
“Quiet, Winters.” Heisenberg tightened his grip around him.
“Please—don’t.”
“Shh.” Then without any other sound, he started rubbing.
Ethan couldn’t stop the sobs in time – not that he cared too much anymore. The concept of decency was long gone by now.
He only feared… what would this man’s limits be? And if Ethan was breaking down now, what hopes did he have for making it through to the end?
“Come on, now,” Heisenberg said and rubbed more intensely, more focused on making Ethan hard.
And somehow, Ethan knew this wasn’t gonna happen now.
Heisenberg’s breathing deepened; he sat up, leaning over Ethan’s crotch and adjusting his grip on him.
“Stop it,” Ethan said weakly, desperately. “It won’t, I won’t…”
“You don’t actually have to want it.” His tone was serious. “I wanna makeyou.”
“I can’t, please…”
“Youwill.”
Something gripped at Ethan’s chest. He had heard, not that he was happy to, about rape victims experiencing arousal during their assault. Heisenberg probably knew that too—
Had he done this before?
Ethan’s body sank in dejection. Why wouldn’t he have?
Still, Ethan knew he had the potential of becoming aroused, even at such a brutal moment. But he knew his body, he knew himself, and he knew that no matter how hard Heisenberg tried, he wouldn’t achieve his goal right now.
And the fucking bastard didn’t seem willing to hear how pointless his current actions were.
Unless one of his goals was to make Ethan seethe with disgust; in that case, he was devastatingly successful.
“Please,” he tried again, only a whisper this time.
To his despair, Heisenberg didn’t even seem excited now as he had been before. He only looked determined to make Ethan hard, as if he hadn’t humiliated him enough already.
Just how much more was Ethan meant to lose? How much more did Heisenberg expect him to give up?
Ethan jumped from miserable thought to miserable thought, trying to muddle his mind and stop himself from focusing on what was happening. Mia getting shot. Chris treating him like an animal. The innocent villagers dying in front of his eyes. Miranda taking his Rose away. Rose crying, begging for someone to protect her. Dimitrescu and her daughters torturing him. Donna fucking with his mind. Mia’s voice…
He was now sobbing and crying too hard for his senses to register anything else. He supposed Heisenberg had let him go, cause he felt his body curl in on itself, lying on his right side, his left hand being now free.
He came back slowly, realizing Heisenberg was hugging him from behind, hand going up and down Ethan’s side. As soon as Ethan’s sobs quieted down a bit, Heisenberg spoke.
“Welcome back. Had I known you’d go right into hysterics from a simple handjob, I would’ve never touched your dick.”
“Let me see her,” Ethan begged.
“Just a little more.” He licked Ethan’s bite wound, then teased him with many smaller bites around it. “You’ve been wonderful…”
He then entered him again.
With his free hand, Ethan grabbed at the bars of the headboard, once again trying to stop himself from squirming away. Heisenberg wasn’t grabbing him, only caressing his torso; Ethan could try and get away at any moment, even with his right hand restrained to the bed.
Heisenberg slipped in and out of him, his hot breath landing on Ethan’s shoulder. His sweaty chest stuck on his back, making Ethan move with him.
Ethan let him. He could feel his thoughts starting to mince together, like they did most times he was about to fall asleep. He couldn’t afford losing consciousness right now, despite the promise of relief from what Heisenberg was doing to him. Instead, he focused on it; his member sliding in and out, his hands caressing his torso and hair, his beard rubbing at his shoulder, his legs wrapping around his…
He had to stay awake. He had to get to Rose; never before had he felt panic from her having stoppedcrying.
“I’m right here,” he whispered softly. A different kind of pain settled in his chest at the idea of Heisenberg hearing him.
If he had, he didn’t show. He sped up, panting hard and grabbing at Ethan’s hair, firmly but not hard enough to hurt him.
Ethan didn’t have any energy left to beg.
Heisenberg finished again, and Ethan squeezed his eyes close at the sensation. He felt like burning his own body; Heisenberg had promised a bathroom, hadn’t he?
Ethan wiped the tears from his eyes and turned his head back, seeing Heisenberg lay on his back, that same expression of sick pleasure on his face.
“Let me go.” The steadiness of his voice surprised him.
He sighed and rolled his eyes, but with a move of his hand the cuff opened. Ethan sprang from the bed, realizing how sore he felt once his feet touched the floor. He grabbed onto the bed poster.
“Jesus. What the fuck did you do to me?!”
“I could have been worse. It’s not my fault you were so tight.”
Ethan steadied himself and went for the door Rose was in.
“You’re gonna go in like that?” Heisenberg asked.
Ethan looked at him, to see him point at his naked body.
“Even I have some limits.” He stood up and walked to a wardrobe on the wall across from the bed.
Ethan groaned. It wasn’t like she’d never lain on his bare chest; she’d been born in the middle of the summer, after all. He didn’t want to miss any more time, but he had to admit it was a bit cold. “After what you did to her, you call her seeing me naked a limit?”
Heisenberg didn’t refute his part in what had happened. But he said, “If you insist on being present in her life, I think it’d be better to not give her any hints as to what exactly our relationship is.” He walked to him, holding a set of clothes in his hands.
Ethan felt a shiver as he picked them up. Would Rose remember this day? Would she remember what they did to her?
The clothes were a simple, grayed shirt and dark brown pants. They felt clean, despite the scent of machine oil and tobacco. And him.
He looked at Heisenberg, who was putting his pants on and watching him back.
What the fuck had he gotten himself into?
He decided to put on his underwear as well and dressed awkwardly, his aching legs not providing much help. His thoughts flew off when he heard the bolt on the door move. He ran to the door and went inside.
It was an actual bathroom. Between the door and the sink was a pile of blankets, and on it lay Rose, curled in on herself. She was sleeping… probably.
Ethan’s knees gave out when he reached her. “Rose,” he whispered.
She reacted quickly, preparing to cry as soon as he picked her up. She then opened her eyes.
He could barely see her; his vision was blurred with tears. “Rose,” he said again, rubbing at her forehead with his thumb.
Rose raised her small hand and touched his chin. Through his tears, he saw a tiny smile appear on her face.
The dam broke; he pulled her close to him and started weeping.
She was alright.
Somehow, against all odds, he had made it. He had survived… mostly.
It was as if the weight of the entire day was settling down on him right then. Chris shooting Mia, then taking Rose and him. The villagers dying. The lycans, Dimitrescu and her daughters, Donna, Moreau…
Heisenberg.
He was leaning on the doorframe, half-naked, watching Ethan as he cried.
“You have nothing better to do?!” Ethan shouted, voice broken from sobs. He pulled Rose even closer to him.
Heisenberg smiled; a lazy, arrogant smile. He opened his mouth to speak, when a long, low rumbling was heard from underground.
Heisenberg’s stance immediately changed. He looked at the ground for a moment, then with a move of his hand a chain appeared around Ethan’s ankle, the other end wrapping around an exposed pipe on the wall.
Without a word, Heisenberg stormed off, closing the doors behind him.
Rose twitched from the loud sounds, her face turning into a grimace.
“Shh-shh,” Ethan said and rubbed at her hair. “It’s alright. Daddy’s here now. I’m not letting you go.”
He raised her a bit to leave a kiss on her forehead, then let her rest against his chest, hoping the sound of his heartbeat would calm her down.
Another shiver ran down his spine. He hada heartbeat. He could barely even process what he really was now, how he was even still walking, and talking, and thinking, yet he was shaken by the concept of having a heartbeat.
It wasn’t even his heart anymore; who knew whose poor villager’s body Heisenberg had robbed it from, yet it beat now in his chest, as natural as ever.
He looked down at Rose, getting sleepy in his arms.
What the hell was he going to do? Even if- whenhe got her and himself out of there, what was he going to do next? He had to make sure she was safe, that she would survive…
A soft sob left his lips. He felt utterly, devastatingly alone. Almost all the dangers from the village were dead, yet he still had Heisenberg and the entire BSAA to think of.
The BSAA. They must have known something was wrong with him. And they kept their mouths conveniently shut; they had promised them safety, and now here he was…
He swallowed hard. He took them all down. First the Baker house, now this village. He’d take the rest of them down, if it meant Rose’s safety.
His eyes were closing.
He’d make sure she’d be safe…
The wall was just so close, so easy to lean on.
He just wished he had just a single soul to trust Rose to, in case he wouldn’t make it past it all…
His body relaxed, though somehow his arms knew to stay up, to hold Rose safe, close to him.
Summary: [Canon divergence] Heisenberg revives Ethan after the latter’s heart gets ripped out by Miranda, and now he has him where he wants him; unable to refuse the new deal he’s offering him.
A/N: Hi you may know me in the fandom as piracytheorist. This is the account where I write all the noncon stuff. Yes, that’s right, noncon. This is where this fic is going, shamelessly so. Dead Dove Do Not Eat and all that. Nothing explicit happens in this first chapter, but you may wanna check out the ao3 link for the tags.
Warnings: Mentions of blood, human experimentation, eventual noncon.
Note: So, canon divergence: After Heisenberg transforms and throws Ethan down to the bottom of the factory, Ethan doesn’t encounter Chris (so he doesn’t find out it was not Mia he’d shot), but he finds the self-propelled artillery anyway and goes on to fight him. The fight starts, the factory doesn’t explode, Ethan watches Heisenberg’s machine form get destroyed, Miranda appears and rips Ethan’s heart out, then Ethan has that vision of Eveline telling him the truth. The story continues from that.
~
Chapter 1: The Truth
~
You’re already dead.
Ethan found himself somewhere between a dream – or a nightmare, to be more precise – and reality, Eveline’s words echoing in the dark vagueness he was surrounded by.
Hecould piece together what was real; Miranda had ripped his heart out, yet she hadn’t killed him, cause he was already dead, had been for three years. That was real. Eveline wasn’t – though what she had said was true.
He had died at the Baker house. He’d never come out of it alive, as he had wrongfully been grateful for.
How could he not have known? He should have, somehow. He was no different than the mold creatures in the Baker house, or the Bakers themselves.
He thought of Mia, looking almost upset that he couldn’t understand what was troubling her.
She’d known, somehow, and it was right then he realized that.
How could he not have known?
Sudden shivers through his body dragged him fully back into consciousness. The pain remained, as if it was so massive it had bled through into the nightmare-like vision of Eveline, but now the feeling of cold was contained on his upper body, particularly his chest.
He coughed.
“Whoa there. Stay asleep for a little longer, won’t you?”
That voice…
There was something covering his mouth. He tried to raise his hand to take it off, but something caught it and kept it down, something cold and hard…
Metal.
He opened his eyes.
Heisenberg was leaning over him, in his normal form. He wore no hat or glasses, his hair was pulled back, and he only wore a shirt with the sleeves rolled up.
Somehow Ethan knew that it wasn’t Heisenberg’s blood that was splattered all over his arms.
Ethan tried to speak. He moved his lips; there was some kind of fabric over his mouth, with a horrible, nauseating stench.
“Should’ve known your body would fight anesthesia… the way it fought everything else,” Heisenberg said and took off the fabric.
“How…” Ethan said. “I… killed you…”
“No, you didn’t,” Heisenberg said as he straightened and wiped at his arms with a towel. “What you destroyed was a metal structure that only transmitted my voice.” He looked at Ethan. “I had to try the damn thing before I fused with it. To my surprise, that bitch Miranda actually fell for it too.”
“Wh-what?”
“That wasn’t me, Winters. I was inside my factory, watching your entire pointless fight from a safe distance. Then Miranda appeared, thinking I was actually dead.” He snorted a laugh and shook his head. “Didn’t think she’d take you out so shamelessly, though.”
“Where is she? Where is Rose?!” Ethan was still weak, his entire body hurting and his chest nearly burning, but he tried to get up.
Heisenberg pushed him down where he was lying. “Miranda is dead.” A small smile spread on his lips. It looked almost innocent, light. “That bitch is gone. Oh, what a sight it was, to see her blown to bits. You should have been there.”
Ethan couldn’t help the feeling of satisfaction at learning of Miranda’s fate. But he didn’t trust Heisenberg one bit. “What did you do to my daughter?”
“Relax, papa. Her power is raw, untamed. I only needed one touch before I could channel her energy.”
“Youtouchedher?”
“Aw, don’t be like that. What do you take me for?”
Ethan didn’t answer, though the implication terrified him.
“Oh. You’re hurting my feelings, Winters. But I suppose you are in quite a shock right now. Well, trust me, it was as innocent and as plain a touch as it could be.”
Ethan let out a forceful chuckle. “You haven’t given me one single reason to trust you – or to not hurt your feelings,” he said, hissing out the last word. “Where is Rose?!”
“She’s alright. Probably sleeping, she did have a long day.” He looked him up and down. “Aren’t you worried about yourself? Don’t you remember what Miranda did to you?”
Ethan raised his hand again, now without any obstruction. He brought it to his chest, and turned to look when his fingers found… stitches.
Indeed, the place over his heart had been stitched together.
To his shocked silence, Heisenberg said, “I suppose you saw what my Soldaten were reduced to once you were done with them.”
“Mechanical hearts…” Ethan whispered.
Heisenberg hummed.
Ethan looked back at him, shaking his head. “No,” he said. “I had my fucking brain stomped on and somehow it grew back. I could do the same—“
His words were cut off when a burn almost exploded in his heart—yes, heart. He couldn’t breathe. He looked at Heisenberg’s hand; it was wrapped into a fist, tense and tight. Then he relaxed it, and the burning feeling stopped. He could breathe again.
Heisenberg smiled again, leaning down over him. “A mechanical heart that’s full of metal. Would you like another demonstration, or have I proved my point?”
Ethan was gasping, desperate for some room away from him. “Why? You killed Miranda, so why bring me back?”
“A ‘thank you’ would suffice.”
Ethan’s chest burned up again, but this time for an entirely different reason. He raised his head a bit and spat at Heisenberg’s face. “How about a ‘fuck you’ instead?”
He didn’t seem annoyed at all at Ethan’s gesture. If anything, he looked amused. “And here I was about to let you see your daughter…” He straightened up and started turning away.
“Wait- wait…” Ethan moved, reaching for him and grabbing his arm with a force that surprised even himself. “Is she alright?”
“I told you, she’s fine.” He shook his head. “You’re really that unwilling to accept how powerful she is?”
“I don’t care how powerful she is. I just want to see she’s okay.”
Heisenberg sighed and pulled his arm away. “Let’s get you somewhere more comfortable first, shall we?”
Ethan looked at him. He couldn’t imagine a single place in this factory would approach ‘comfortable’.
Heisenberg reached to a table next to him and threw Ethan’s hoodie and jacket at him. “Get dressed. The corridors are cold.”
Ethan looked at the hoodie. There was a big fucking hole where Miranda had ripped his heart out…
Holy fuck. What the fuck.
He looked back at his chest. Staples instead of stitches, of course.
He didn’t have the strength to look at it too long, or assess the rest of the blood covering his torso. He had to get up, get to Rose.
Once he put the clothes on, Heisenberg put a pair of handcuffs on Ethan’s wrists.
Ethan was too tired to protest.
Heisenberg gestured at two Soldats, who grabbed one of Ethan’s arms each, then walked out the door.
After a few steps down a corridor, Heisenberg took a turn while the Soldats took Ethan on another.
“Hey! Hey, wait!”
“Patience, Winters.” He didn’t even look back at him.
Lacking weapons, alternatives, and if he were truly honest, energy, Ethan followed the Soldats. They took him further inside the factory, a part of it he hadn’t had the luck to explore. They opened a door and Ethan nearly froze in his tracks when he saw it was a bedroom. The luxurious four-poster bed – made out of metal, of course – stood out within its simple design. The Soldats dragged him to the foot of the bed, where they secured the handcuffs on the metal bars of the bed frame, forcing Ethan to sit down on the floor.
Ethan looked at his hands, then at the Soldats standing on attention at each of his sides. Just from how far away could Heisenberg control them? Those two were the first ones who, at such close proximity to him, weren’t trying to kill him. Ethan could guess they must’ve been under special orders.
For what reason? Why was Heisenberg so insistent on keeping him alive— or, as alive as he was right now?
How was he getting out of this? He had to get out, save Rose…
His head felt heavy, and he thought, for just a few seconds, he could rest it on the bed frame…
~
Note:I headcanon Heisenberg speaks German because of his ancestry, though I haven’t decided whether he’d be fluent or just conversational in it. In any case, this is why he says “Soldaten”, the actual plural version of “Soldat”, while the narration, being from Ethan’s POV (whom I headcanon not speaking German) calls them “Soldats”.
Summary: [Canon divergence] Heisenberg revives Ethan after the latter’s heart gets ripped out by Miranda, and now he has him where he wants him; unable to refuse the new deal he’s offering him.
No, it didn’t make sense. The rhythm was too normal.
Wait.
Creeeeaaaak. Pat. Pat.
He opened his eyes; the slow tapping continued.
Immediately, he looked down; Rose was sleeping peacefully in his arms.
Pat. Pat.
Someone was coming. He looked at the chain around his leg, then around the room.
He had nothing to cut it off with.
Silence.
Nothing to defend himself or Rose with—
The door opened. He bent forward, covering Rose with his body, preparing himself for an attack.
The short silent moment that followed threw him completely off.
But not as much as what came next.
“Ethan?”
Mia’s voice.
He gasped. No… no.
He shook his head.
“Ethan! Ethan, look at me!”
He saw her legs as she knelt down next to him. She was wearing the same home pants she wore yesterday…
“Ethan!”
He started whispering. “She’s dead. She’s dead. Shesdeadshesdeadshesdead…” Donna was dead. She couldn’t be-
“Ethan! It’s me! Chris didn’t kill me. That was Miranda.”
He froze.
What the hell was this?
“Listen to me. It’s me. It’s really me! But Miranda had taken my form, she had kidnapped me.”
Ethan started raising his head.
“Chris tried to kill her while she still pretended to be me. He found me, just a while ago, and told me what had happened, that you might get shocked at seeing me…”
She stopped when his head was finally up. She looked at him, tears starting to run from her eyes. Instead of wiping those, she reached for his face, wiping at… his tears?
Oh. He was crying, then.
“M-Mia?”
“It’s me. It’s really me, baby.” She nearly jumped at him, holding him and Rose close. He felt something hard against his left arm, where her right hand rested.
Still in shock, he chanced a look; it was a gun.
Mia bent down to Rose, peppering her tiny face with kisses. “Hey, sweetie. Mommy’s here,” she said, voice breaking by a sob.
Then she leaned back, wiping the tears from her face, and looked at him with a serious face.
“We have to go. Chris is planting explosives through the entire factory. We need to get clear so that he can blow this fucking place up.”
“But- but…”
“It’s okay. It’s gonna be alright. I promise you. We have to go.” She grabbed at his shoulder, as if trying to get him to get up.
He looked at his ankle, then Mia looked as well.
“Shit.” She placed the gun next to him, then grabbed the chain, checking for any weak points.
“You might as well cut my foot off,” he blurted out before thinking.
Mia gave him a terrified look.
God, was it really not a dream? Was she really here? She was looking upset by the idea of removing a limb of his… again.
He smiled.
“You think that’s funny?” Her face was still shocked.
He closed his mouth and pulled himself together. She was getting upset, being reminded by the time she was under Eveline’s control…
Her triggers. Fuck. She was really here. It was not a dream.
“Mia…” was all he managed to say.
Before he could take a breath to say more, heavy boots sounded from outside.
He gasped. “Hide!” he hissed.
Mia looked at the bathroom door.
“Hide! He’ll kill you!”
With one last look at the two of them, she picked up the gun, stood up, and went for the door.
Ethan’s heart nearly leapt out of his chest, but she only closed it, right before they heard the sound of the bedroom door opening.
She turned around and ran, hiding on the side of the sink counter.
Then the bathroom door opened again.
Heisenberg took one step in. Once again he leaned on the door frame, setting his eyes on Ethan and Rose.
Keep him there. Don’t let him move and see Mia.
“Time’s up,” Heisenberg said, releasing Ethan’s leg from the chain.
“Motherfucker. You can’t even keep your end of the deal?” Ethan said without thinking, but then stood up to put Rose back on the pile, covering her with a blanket this time. His back at Heisenberg, he chanced once single look at Mia. She was squirmed on the side of the counter, her gun at the ready.
Ethan shook his head, just a little, hoping Heisenberg wouldn’t notice. Mia’s eyebrows shot up, but she relaxed her grip on the gun. Her face started turning into an expression of terror, and then Ethan turned towards Heisenberg.
He was looking none the wiser, still smiling.
Ethan’s mouth went dry. Mia… She would hear them…
He looked around nervously, spotting an old but probably working bathtub.
“Can I at least take a bath?”
Heisenberg’s smile widened. “Only if you let me join you.”
You sick fuck.
Ethan shook his head and started walking out into the bedroom.
“What?” Heisenberg said. “You let me fuck you, but a bath together is where you draw the line?”
Ethan shivered; as terrifying this whole ordeal was, it was nothing compared to knowing Mia would be listening now.
Heisenberg closed and locked the bathroom door. He walked to the fireplace on the opposite wall and raised his hand. A few clicks and whirring sounds were heard, then sparks flew on the logs that were already set inside the fireplace.
“It will take a while for the room to get warm,” Heisenberg said, walking back to him. “Until then…” He started taking off Ethan’s shirt, noticing how he was still shivering.
“Relax, Winters. What’s with you? Why so nervous all of the sudden?”
“You think this is easy for me? Being forced to do what you want me to?”
He felt like an idiot, but it was his only way to communicate to Mia that none of what would come next was happening with his consent.
Hey baby, I’m not really cheating on you, I’m just letting this crazy motherfucker rape me. No biggie.
“Forced,” Heisenberg said and snorted. He picked up Ethan’s bandaged hand and looked at it carefully. “When did that happen?”
“Uh… I’m not… Yesterday morning, I guess?” Had it already been a day since then? It felt like both a century and minutes ago that this whole nightmare started.
Heisenberg unwrapped the bandage. To no-one’s surprise anymore, Ethan could see the scar tissue already forming under the closed wound.
“How did it happen?”
Ethan swallowed hard. “A lycan bit it.”
“Just your hand?”
“I had… I had it cut on a fence. It had been bleeding a bit. I think the blood attracted him.”
“Hmm”, Heisenberg said and kept examining Ethan’s hand. Then, before Ethan could prepare himself for it, he started licking the wound.
Ethan startled, trying to retrieve his hand, but Heisenberg’s grip was strong, and he seemed determined to get his own taste of him. His tongue ran across the caked blood, as if it wanted to scratch it off and reach in for some blood.
Heisenberg moaned softly against his hand, then let go. “I can see why your blood attracted them.”
Before Ethan could reply, Heisenberg pushed him against the door, slamming his lips on his.
Ethan froze, keeping his lips shut, until Heisenberg sighed against them and pulled back.
“Come on, Ethan. Kiss me back. Don’t make me feel like I’m kissing the door behind you instead.”
Ethan whimpered softly as Heisenberg’s hands went up his chest again, then his lips touched his, softer this time. Reluctantly, Ethan opened his mouth.
The taste made him want to vomit; it was like the putrid stench from the Baker house was being forced down his throat.
Was that… was that what his own kisses were like?
Was that how Mia realized…?
Heisenberg moved back just as a bout of sobs overcame Ethan. Not much of a blessing, as immediately after he rested his hands on Ethan’s cheeks, caressing them softly with his thumbs.
“It’s alright,” he said as Ethan calmed down. “I just wanted to give you a first taste.”
He pulled back abruptly, grabbing Ethan from the back of his neck and pushing him towards the bed, then leading him to get on his knees.
“Don’t worry,” he whispered. “You can keep your pants on this time.”
Oh, no.
Oh, holy shit.
Fuck.
Heisenberg sat on the edge of the bed, facing Ethan, then undid his pants and let his flaccid cock slide out.
Ethan looked away, wringing his hands.
“Oh come on, Winters, you’ll make me self-conscious,” Heisenberg said in a mock-shy voice.
“Give me a fucking moment.”
Mia, holy shit, I am so sorry…
He realized he was rubbing his hands so forcefully, he was surprised that his left hand wasn’t hurting. It hadn’t hurt almost at all since he had bandaged it.
How could he have been so careless, to not wonder why that had been?
“I gotta warn you,” Heisenberg interrupted his thoughts, “I’m easy to get hard. But I want you to do it.”
Shit.
He felt a tear run down his cheek, struggling to admit the truth. “I’ve… I’ve never done this before.”
“Ah. You’ve never gone down on your wife?”
Ethan cringed. He had. Not that it was any of Heisenberg’s business.
“Guess you mean you’ve never sucked cock before. It’s simple. Just cover your teeth with your lips, like this.”
From the corner of his eye, Ethan could see Heisenberg demonstrating to him.
“I know howto do it,” he almost growled.
“She has returned the favour, hasn’t she?”
“Shut the fuck up.”
“Bruised ego, Winters?”
He groaned. It had nothing to do with his ego. He felt exposed and uncomfortable, but that wouldn’t compare to the devastation he’d feel had this discussion happened just a few minutes ago, before he’d found out Mia was still alive.
“Can you stop talking about my life with my wife? She… I watched her die just yesterday.”
And I’ll watch her die for good if I don’t find a way to distract you now.
Heisenberg didn’t react, and Ethan felt helpless. All his efforts to make him sympathize with him had been in vain.
“Ah, just get on with it,” Heisenberg said.
Images of him and Mia flooded his mind. Them lying on the bed, Mia smiling that smile of hers, then moving down…
I’m so sorry, Mia.
He closed his eyes.
It will never feel the same again.
He moved his head closer and took a deep breath.
If I ever get out of here…
You will. I don’t care how. I’ll make sure you both will.
He opened his eyes and took Heisenberg full in his mouth. Grabbing at the edge of the bed, he fought through his gag reflex and his own disgust at what he was being forced to do.
“Agh, your teeth, Winters.”
Ethan moaned against the length in his mouth, but wrapped his lips over his teeth.
Heisenberg sighed. “You know I am a little into biting.” With a finger, he caressed the bite mark he’d left him not too long ago. “But I’m pretty sensitive there.”
He got hard, and Ethan felt tears run down his cheeks. He could barely breathe with his mouth full of him.
He tried to move, making desperate attempts to satisfy the monster in front of him. He didn’t know… He was…
Despite himself, he thought how he’d do it for Mia, and how she’d do it for him…
Somehow, Heisenberg seemed to take pity on him, as he grabbed the back of his head and made him move the way he wanted.
Ethan still struggled to relax, his body fighting against the loss of control while his mind begged it to let go, to let Heisenberg take over.
He was being ripped apart; he wasn’t meant to resist, but the more he tried to convince himself to give up, the more he hated himself.
Heisenberg looked completely clueless to Ethan’s inner turmoil, as he threw his head back and moaned hard. To him, it didn’t matter whether Ethan struggled or not. The one he knew would care was beside the wall, listening to the whole thing.
Appease the beast. Make him shut up until you find a way to get them out of here…
With a final, trembling sigh, Ethan’s body relaxed, becoming nothing more like a ragdoll that Heisenberg used to bring himself to the edge.
He thought Heisenberg said something, but between his gasping and his own lost state, he couldn’t tell what it was.
Then the grip tightened; he used both hands to keep Ethan’s head steady as he came in his mouth.
The sensation dragged Ethan painfully back to the surface, but he couldn’t pull back. Heisenberg’s cum dripped from his lips.
Heisenberg wasn’t letting go.
“Take it down,” he said, again.
Oh. That’s what that was, then.
Feeling the last bit of his pride shatter, Ethan swallowed. Only then did Heisenberg move back, lying down on the mattress as Ethan curled in on himself.
There was a toilet in the bathroom. He’d never had to force himself to vomit before, but there was a first time for everything, right?
Heisenberg sighed again, voice dripping with pleasure, and he stood up, picked up the shirt Ethan wore before and threw it at him.
“Go on. I’m sure she missed you,” he said.
Resisting the urge to wipe his mouth on the cloth, Ethan put it on. His knees were shaking when he forced himself up, he could barely make it to the door that Heisenberg opened for him, beckoning him in like Ethan was some kind of a Lord himself.
Just as he crossed into the bathroom though, Heisenberg pushed him in, and before Ethan could get his bearings, he had fallen on all four.
Panic overwhelmed him at the thought of Heisenberg taking him right then and there, and it didn’t subside even as he heard the door close and lock, Heisenberg’s boots fading away as the bedroom door closed as well.
There was silence, broken only by his shaky whimpers.
“Ethan?” Mia whispered.
He bit his lip, then regretted it as soon as he got another taste of Heisenberg’s cum on it.
He heard Mia’s quiet footsteps as she came closer to him.
“Ethan…” she said, then softly placed her hand on his back.
Feeling a shiver of disgust, he shakily got to his feet, supported himself on the sink and opened the tap.
He rinsed his mouth and spat. He rinsed and spat. Rinsed and spat. The taste was gone, but the feeling was not.
“Ethan…”
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered.
“Don’t be.” Her voice was shaky too. She turned him towards her and wrapped her arms around him.
He still felt disgusted by himself, but he couldn’t help his body leaning into her, into a touch he wanted, that he was desperate for.
“It’s not your fault.”
“I’m… I’m letting him do this to me.”
“Did he threaten you? Or Rose?”
His lips trembled, and he barely choked back a sob.
“It’s not your fault,” she said again as she wrapped her arms tighter and leaned her head on his shoulder.
He flinched when that movement accidentally jostled his bite mark. She pulled back, worried, as he moved the shirt aside to look at it.
Mia gasped. “What has he done to you?”
“You have to get out of here. Take Rose and go.”
“Wewill get out of here. All three of us.”
“I have to distract him. I’ll find a way, I’ll find something. First opportunity you get, you take Rose out of here.”
“I’m not leaving you here!” She was still speaking in a low voice, but the despair in her voice was obvious.
“You have to. If Heisenberg finds you here he’ll kill you. I’m lucky enough he’s obsessed with me enough to bring me back.”
Mia was silent for a moment, then said, “Bring you back?”
He closed his eyes and swallowed hard. “I know. About what you wouldn’t tell me before.”
She stared at him. “Wh- what?”
He showed her his mangled hand. “This happened just yesterday morning. I didn’t even sew it closed. By all means, it should still be bleeding, but not only is the wound closed, scar tissue is starting to form.” He looked at her, but kept his expression calm.
Mia looked nervous.
He swallowed hard. “Guess I’ll have to show you this as well.” He raised his shirt, allowing her a view of his stitched-up chest.
Her eyes widened wildly. “What the hell is that?” She looked at his face.
Her worried expression made him want to hug her now. But he looked away, gathering the courage to speak. “Miranda ripped my heart out. I thought I was gone for good, but then I had a vision, with Eveline, somehow, telling me what I am, and then I woke up and Heisenberg had put some fucking machine heart inside of me to bring me back.”
He then looked back at her; her lips were trembling, as was the hand she raised and brought closer to the stitched wound.
It barely even hurt him now.
“What the fuck…” she whispered. “He’s crazy…”
He sighed, then dropped the shirt. “He did bring me back.” To rape me. “I can use that.”
Mia shook her head. “I’m sorry. I should have told you, the moment I realized…”
“I’m not mad at you, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”
“You’re not?” She looked at him; she sounded incredulous.
He managed a small smile. “I’m just happy you’re not dead. And yeah, you should have told me, but what matters now is for you and Rose to get to safety.”
“But—”
“But you can’t do this now. You have to get ready, you have to get out of here.”
“Ethan…”
“Please. Let me decide this time.”
That shut her up.
However, he took her hand in his. “Keep Rose safe, no matter what, you hear me?”
Her lips trembled, but he knew she was understanding.
“I survived all the other Lords. Heisenberg only got me because I was stupid enough to let him get to Rose first, to think for onemoment, that maybe I could trust him. Now I know I can’t. But I canget away from him. If you and Rose aren’t here to—“
His blood froze when the door suddenly slammed open. Mia shrieked, and Ethan turned to the door, shielding her body with his.
Not this time.
Heisenberg chuckled as Mia’s gun flew towards his hand. “Did you really think I’m that daft? Did you think I wouldn’t know she came in here? Even if I hadn’t noticed that the door wasn’t locked before, as I had left it?”
“Don’t hurt her,” Ethan blurted out.
“Now, why would I do that to the best baby sitter I could hope for?” He threw a duffel bag towards them. “Diapers, towels… it took my Soldaten a little searching around the village, but there were some essentials within all the trash they brought. Mommy’s still breastfeeding, right?”
Ethan felt his own shiver along with Mia’s. How the hell did he know that?
“You can keep that brat fed and clean until I set up something more permanent. Even so, I just want her power. If sparing you means I don’t get to bother with taking care of her or listening to her wails all the time, so be it.” He stepped closer to Ethan. “Now, how about some more negotiation? I add your lovely wife’s safety into the luxuries you get, and you stop begging me to see your daughter every five seconds.”
“You—you won’t hurt her?”
“Ah, I think being trapped in here will be punishment enough. I will get rid of her once the kid is old enough to fend for herself, though that will take some years, won’t it?” He smiled at him.
Ethan’s mouth went dry. How long did he intend on keeping this up?
Still, it gave them precious time, time that he could never have hoped for. “Alright,” he said.
“Ethan, wait,” Mia said halfheartedly, touching his shoulder.
Ethan looked back at her; he knew she was only saying it out of duty.
“Oh, how sweet,” Heisenberg said. “You know I am gonna keep fucking him whether you’re alive or not, don’t you missie?”
Mia’s hand on Ethan’s shoulder shook.
“It’s alright,” Ethan said, unsure if it was just to her or to himself as well. “I can handle it.”
Heisenberg laughed.
Her eyes filled with tears as Ethan’s face fell. “You take care of her, okay?”
Her lips trembled again when Heisenberg grabbed Ethan’s arm and dragged him out. Ethan looked at her hopelessly reaching her hand for him, as the door between them closed.
~
A/N: I am most ashamed that I forgot to share a couple fanarts I’ve found that are vibe-like to this piece, some of whom even inspired me for this fic :)
4) A very, veryexplicit one, like fully NSFW stuff, that I also saw after writing this chapter, but it’s amazing, and again, super explicit, and very very much my type of thing. A little bit different to how Ethan acts in this chapter, but still, very appropriate:
Okay seriously what the fuck, I come back to tumblr to find that they’re forcing suggested posts near constantly and they’ve put multiple posts glorifying and encouraging disordered eating and withholding food from yourself as punishment on my dash?
The Outrage Is About Control, Not Breasts | Renegade Cut – Censorship is the suppression of an idea or image by an entity more powerful than its target. No entity more powerful than Square-Enix is forcing the design of Final Fantasy VII character Tifa. The outrage about her current design is a reactionary movement against an unequal status quo. Support Renegade Cut Media through Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/renegadecut
content warning: The video not only discusses the issue of gender and racial discrimination, as well as sexual assault, but also includes clips of real police brutality. Viewer discretion is advised.
A very comprehensive video explaining what we touched upon regarding the “pro-sexyness”/”anti-censorship”rhetoric multiple times before, especially here.
It’s never really about “the SJWs banning boobs” or something to that effect - it’s about upholding the status quo, so that cishet white dudes (and their presumed preferences) get catered to almost exclusively.
Of course there must be some dudes stupid enough to actually think that sexyness, cishetness or whiteness (or “ethics in game journalism”) is being taken away from them in pop media, but ultimately it comes down to the tangible loss of control and visibility. That’s why they feel legitimately threatened by something as simple as a woman who’s even slightly not a sex object in a video game.
~Ozzie
edit: Readers notified us that the video could use some content warning for police brutality footage.
As a general follow up to all discourse about whether cartoon candy makes certain people horny enough - its worth remembering that the reason this “discourse” gets so ridiculous and so absurd is because its never actually about the topic at hand and always about enforcing the idea of their regressive view of society as normal, correct and necessary.
What a coincidence that it just happens to require we favour them unconditionally and put their personal insecurities ahead of things like… other people’s safety and right to general peaceful enjoyment of their own life.
A number of people have proposed that the Green M&M fiasco is not just the most hilarious combination of a corporation seeking feminist cookies and reactionary backlash in a while, but is also an attempt by chocolate magnates to distract from them being prosecuted for knowingly profiteering off child labor, slavery and human trafficking. (content warning: links after this discuss the issues in detail)
So whether you believe Tucker Carson got paid to throw his tantrum or not, please do be aware that the chocolate industry is one that has a long history of barbaric exploitation of children in western Africa.
Amber Kyzer said her marriage to Tim Jones started out well but became increasingly abusive. Tim would regularly beat her, spit on her, and threaten to chop her up and feed her to the pigs. Once he even broke her back teeth out by throwing a phone at her head.
After Amber left in a bid to dispel the toxic tension between them and preserve Tim’s relationship with their five children, he routinely sent her short videos of the children crying for her in an attempt to lure her back under his control. His efforts failed. Tim murdered all five children in cold blood and drove their bodies around for nine days before dumping them in rural Alabama. The children were aged between eight and one years old. He expressed no remorse during his trial.
You might’ve seen these charms making the rounds a few months back:
The creator of these charms,Tempural,akaSKUMSUCK,has drawn and defended necrophilia, noncon, and suggestive art of underaged characters. They also associate and are friends with Bone-Critter aka LOVEWORMZ on Twitter. Bone-Critter is roommates witha user named Custat who has worked on a NSFW shotacon manga.
For anyone who was doubtful. deadscoutz is their other URL. These were posted on their Pixiv, you can only view them if you have an account because it’s tagged as 18+. Original was not censored.
It’s gotten worse. I’ve found out recently that they were following accounts that posted explicit images of drawn CP on their NSFW blog. They continue to change twitter handles to avoid my call outs so they won’t be traced back to their main. When changing urls, they replace these accounts with shocker images of prolapsed anuses and scat. This is strictly against twitters rules and is incredibly disgusting. Their new handle has a gay slur in it, despite them being a cis woman.
Please, spread the word.
This is SKUMSUCK on Twitter, tempural on tumblr.
Just some updates:
New NSFW twitter handle is breadscoutz
Their followers are now implying that I’M a sexual predator because I don’t… have a rape kink?
You might’ve seen these charms making the rounds a few months back:
The creator of these charms,Tempural,akaSKUMSUCK,has drawn and defended necrophilia, noncon, and suggestive art of underaged characters. They also associate and are friends with Bone-Critter aka LOVEWORMZ on Twitter. Bone-Critter is roommates witha user named Custat who has worked on a NSFW shotacon manga.
For anyone who was doubtful. deadscoutz is their other URL. These were posted on their Pixiv, you can only view them if you have an account because it’s tagged as 18+. Original was not censored.
Pretty soon I’m going to start posting my horror related art,
some of these visuals might be a bit intense for some viewers, so if you have triggers of the following, here’s the last shot to spoiler tag them! I will be posting art that is NOT horror of course, but this blog will now be hosting both :)
Tags to cover:
Body horror, trypophobia, dolls, bugs, uncanny visuals, and general Horror tags.
♚ ghoulg1rl’s full illustration featuring MM!Gonta Gokuhara will be available in the “I Am The MASTERMIND!” Danganronpa Fanzine. Make sure to get your bundle before preorders close Feb 20th!
![rudy [it/he/she]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/02d42a5a9d80026c3f7eca28c03ffde2/fb25e42901eae2a6-f9/s30x30u_c1/2ce3d33269709237c43eee28def20b7b546dfd1f.png){kind=small}
