A/N: hi!!! its been a while lol T-T sorry i’ve been so inactive school has been kind of hard lol but i wanna start writing more consistently!!! i’m gonna try to post two fics this month so look forwards to that!!! i hope you’re doing well and hope you enjoy ;0
Warnings: allusions to injury, just Jean being soft
Word Count: 510
Summary: “love is always better - when we take time to get back to who we are - when we are apart - distance makes the heart grow” - “Distance” by Emily King
Jean Gunnhildr X Reader (GN)
The promise of correspondence has been kept, on both accounts. Normally once a month, sometimes twice if either of them weren’t too busy. Letters with wax seals, and cursive sent to the Adventurer’s Guild. A welcome reprieve from the fighting and the quests. Letters stained with dirt and the occasionally pressed dandelion were sent to the Acting Grandmaster’s office, a sight that always made Jean breathe a sigh of relief. Some days, when the weight on both their shoulders grew too heavy, an extra gift would be sent. A new set of gloves for Jean, a new recipe for the Adventurer to make. Reminders, so no matter what went on in their lives, there was someone there waiting for a reply. A sign to know that someone cared.
Opening their presents was one of Jean’s favorite parts of the day, next to greeting the stray dog that wandered outside the Knight’s headquarters. They always had something snarky to say, a story to tell, or an ominous message of trouble along the horizon. This letter was no different. “…And then I summoned my weapon, and by pure luck managed to strike the creature right between its eyes. Quite the battle of I say do myself,” they had written. Jean can imagine their hands moving as they talk, much like the first time the pair met. “But I hope you’re doing well. Send your sister my regards, and thank you for the spare Mora. All my love…” Neatly signed at the bottom, their signature, with a small drawing of a hilichurl at the bottom.
Suppressing a smile, Jean sets the letter aside, glancing at the gift they sent. A picture they took, no larger than a journal. It was a portrait of them, holding up the bag of Mora Barbara had sent, a large smile on their face. Jean couldn’t help but stare. Though they were covered in scratches, a small bandage over their cheek, she thought they looked stunning. Jean didn’t think it was possible to articulate how much their letter brought up her spirits. Being the Acting Grandmaster was no easy job, but at least her life wasn’t in constant danger, a stark contrast to their profession. Not that Jean’s life wasn’t exciting, the citizens of Mondstadt made sure of that, but the energy that emanated from their letters was a welcome change from the other large stack of papers she had to read. Requests from other countries, diplomacy with the Fatui, commissions from townsfolk, all of it ended up in her mailbox. These letters, however, were always delivered with colored paper, sometimes torn in the corners or singed, but always smelling of rainfall. A respite Jean never knew she needed.
It was a nice relationship they shared, one with no definite label, not that either of them minded. The lack of pretense helped them be more genuine, and Jean supposed that was one of the things that drew them closer. It was peaceful.
Many say distance makes you feel more fond of someone, and Jean would have to agree.
Hi! Could you do a one-shot of Jean/Girlfriend. His lover drank the wine and turned into a Titan after Zeke screamed. Then could you show everyone’s reaction and what they decide to do. :D
A/N: Sorry this took a little bit, but I’m really happy with how this turned out! Also had to catch up on the last two episodes that came out (including the one today omg it was so good). I did take some liberties with the second part of your request, as I focused more on Jean’s reaction. I hope you enjoy and thank you so much for your request!
Word Count: 1.2K
You weren’t one to enjoy alcohol. Usually, you would avoid having even a single glass of wine because you didn’t want to risk the possibility of you being drunk. The thought of being out of your own control in a world that was already so messed up plagued your mind enough to the point that when you and your buddies were passing around a bottle, you’d pass on the opportunity. Plus, the taste of it wasn’t fantastic enough to warrant you actively seeking a sip of the purpley-red liquid.
However, that one night where you wanted to just forget about the fact that your comrades, your family, and your closest friends were six feet under - and you were only nineteen yourself - you found yourself with a flush on your cheeks and a giggle in your throat. It felt so good at the moment, like you were flying in the sky. It was that same adrenaline and completely pleasant feeling that you remembered experiencing when you first mastered using ODM gear; playing hide and seek in the training forests with Connie, Jean, and Sasha. It made you feel like a fifteen year old again. You felt like your old self. Now, it just made you miserable.
The little armband that was affixed to your overcoat did nothing to weigh you down, but you felt like it was constricting your arm. It was hard to process what Commander Pyxis had told you - that the wine you had sipped from was contaminated with Zeke Yeager’s spinal fluid. That the one time, the one instance in which you had let yourself have a drink, it would be the biggest mistake of your life.
At the moment, you were stuck in a cell, swinging your feet on a little stool and trying not to think too hard about what was almost certainly to come within the next few days, maybe in the next few moments. The second that Zeke would yell, it would be over for you. You would transform into the very monster that you had been slaying for the last several years. But, could you really still call them monsters? They were people with lives who had been at the beck and call of Marley. They could have been someone’s Connie, someone’s Sasha. Someone’s Jean… oh god Jean. What would he say when he finds out? Would it be too late, would you have already transformed before you got the chance to say goodbye? And if that did happen, would he even be able to tell if you were a titan? You’d seen it happen before with Armin. A strange, mutated version of the human they once were is projected onto the titan’s face. You almost began to tear up at that possibility - that a gangly titan version of you had your Y/H/C hair, your Y/E/C eyes. A ‘you’ that was so deformed, but still held the characteristics that would prompt someone to say, ‘that’s Y/N’s titan.’
You felt sick. You leant to reach for a bucket, but the locked door that imprisoned you and several others swung open.
“Let’s go, come on. We need you all.” You didn’t bother to look up at the speaker. You were a soldier, and you knew how to follow orders, so you immediately fell into line. A gun was shoved into your hand and there was a pat to your back as you were ushered out of the building and into the usually busy cobblestone streets. A gasp fell from your lips as you looked around you. All over, Marlyeans and Eldians were battling, and in the center of it all, Eren’s titan. That short boy with the raven colored hair that you used to share jokes with and poke fun at, held a stance and stature that felt so wrong. But you didn’t have time to linger or hold onto that thought. Instead, the Beast titan made you freeze in your movements. You couldn’t move, you couldn’t breathe. And yes, while that was part of the titan’s power, this was purely your own body’s actions. An overwhelming fear struck through every one of your nerves that you didn’t notice a Marleyean take aim at you. However, someone else did. In a flurry of movements, Jean killed the man instantly and turned towards you, running as fast as he could. All you could do was watch him. Immediately, Jean gathered you into his arms, clutching and grasping at your arms, your clothes, your hair - like you were water slipping from his hands and he was doing everything he could to keep you there with him.
“Y/N, where the hell have you been, Armin and I have been trying to get everyone of our group back together and you have been the one person to be missing.” He says into your hair, breathing you in and tucking your face into his chest. Again, you find yourself not being able to do anything, so he pulls back to look at you from an arm’s length. “Y/N?”
Your gaze flickers down to your armband and then back to him, which he mimics. You find it truly impressive how many emotions his face shuffles through in one second. Confusion, denial, anger, sadness. He was just missing one to have gone through the whole cycle of grief. Instead, he shook his head.
“No, no. Tell me you didn’t, this has to be a mistake. You hate wine, you hate alcohol in general. It’s probably because you were just with them that they made you wear it.”
“Jean…” you finally croak out, giving him a sad smile and locking your eyes with his. “You… you should go. You need to get away from me. Please.” Pushing him away and backpedaling slowly, you don’t let him out of your sight. He takes a step forward, but your hand goes up. “I don’t want you to be here when this happens, and I don’t think you do either.” His head turns towards the floor, and you know you’ve won. “Hey Jean? Close your eyes for me?” You say, your voice quivering just a bit. He complies. “I love you.” You say, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. And with that, you’re gone, down the road and around the corner. And Zeke let’s forth one hell of a scream.
He lets his feet carry him until he’s into a spring, finally moving to use his ODM gear. Jean finds himself on a rooftop with Armin, Mikasa, and Connie. The light explodes all over the crumbling city, and Jean clamps his hands over his ears. He doesn’t want this, he never wanted this. He wanted a life with you in a little cottage. He wanted to be reading a newspaper while your baby was asleep on his chest, their little hand gripping onto the cloth of his shirt. He won’t get that. He will never get that.
“Is that?” Connie exclaims, shock and sadness taking hold of his tone.
“O-oh my god.” Armin says, his hand moving to cover his dropped jaw.
“No…” Mikasa whispered, her eyes wide. Finally, Jean looks to what they had set their eyes on. A tall, strong looking titan. Y/H/C hair was whipping fiercely in the wind. Y/E/C eyes were buried deep in its face. And quickly, just like that kiss you had given him, a soldier had sliced its nape and it collapsed on the broken, cobble street. Jean let forth a breath. Acceptance.
Genre: smut, pwp for the most part, teensy bit of angst
Warnings: this is filthy, NSFW, minors DNI, BDSM dynamics, emotional manipulation, daddy kink, breeding, unprotected sex, double penetration, oral sex, degradation, praise kink, dacryphilia, dumbification, overstimulation, impact play, choking, threesome, voyeurism, exhibitionism, Eren’s a bit of a dick surprise, surprise
Word count: 4.2k
“I bet you like this, don’t you, whore?” Eren’s long fingers seized your neck, squeezing the sides of your windpipe as he pulled your back flush against his chest. His other hand held a death grip on your hip, guiding your body to meet his thrusts as he fucked up into you from where he sat on the couch. “Bet you want him to walk in here and see this tight little cunt of yours getting stuffed full with my cock, hmm?”
“N-no, Sir,” you mewled breathlessly, closing your eyes to try and focus on not coming undone until you could get his permission, which he’d been denying for so long now. “My pussy s'just for you, Sir.”
His lips curled into a smirk against your shoulder, sinking his teeth in as he tightened his grip on your neck, “Such a good slut today, aren’t you? You really wanna cum, huh? Wanna cream all over this cock?”
“Yes. Yes, please. Wanna cum so bad, Sir,” your voice pitched up into whine, barely hanging on as he continued to pound into you.
“Well that’s really too fuckin’ bad,” his hips stalled, leaving you teetering right on the edge of euphoria that you almost thought he was going to let you taste. “Gonna have to wait a little longer, princess. You can cum when I feel like letting you, got it?”
His lips were roaming your neck, sucking and tugging at the sensitive skin with his teeth as he held your hips in both of his capable hands. Your head lolled to the side, giving him easier access while you suppressed a whimper, not daring to challenge his authority in this situation.
“I see you’re finally learning some self-control,” his words were muffled by the way he spoke, with the skin of your neck between his teeth. He kissed the reddened area, swiping his tongue over salty skin to soothe the love bite. “I might have to reward you for being such a good bitch for me for once.”
“Just wanna cum, Sir, plea–,” you cried out as his hips resumed their assault. This time, two fingers joined his efforts, toying with your clit as his breath fanned over your ear. The sound of keys turning was drowned out by your needy exclamations. Your eyes were snapped shut too tight to see the tall brunette entering the room, the way his eyes widened upon witnessing how easily you were bouncing up and down on top of the man who was now locking eyes with him with a sinister smirk on his face.
“Cum for me, baby,” Eren’s husky command was enough to finally send you tumbling over the edge, blissfully unaware of the third party who had entered the room and was now taking in the sight of your violent orgasm, selfishly unable to look away and entirely unsure of what to do. “Look, babygirl. Daddy’s home,” his dark tone remained hushed, nothing more than a sensual whisper into the shell of your ear as you began drifting down from you high, still bobbing up and down on Eren’s length.
It was so hushed that you weren’t quite sure you caught what he had said, but you opened your eyes anyway, your mouth still slack and spilling forth moan and after groan as you lost yourself in how fucking good you felt after being edged for so long. The shock of seeing his roommate, your friend, standing there, his eyes drinking in every inch of your naked and penetrated body, wasn’t enough to stop the pleasure coursing through you or the sounds that fell from your lips. You jerked momentarily, as if you were trying to stop, to pry yourself away from Eren and into the nearest hiding spot, but you couldn’t. It felt too good, and the way that Jean’s eyes were trained on your pussy, still pulsing and gushing around Eren’s thick cock as it stretched your walls, suddenly seemed so, so hot.
“You wanna play with him, princess?” Eren’s lips feathered kisses between your shoulder blades as he slowed the motion of his hips, whispering against your skin, so that only you could hear his sinful proposition. “I know you do. Consider it your reward for being such a good girl. Go ahead, ask your new Daddy real nice and I bet he’ll fill any hole you ask him too.”
Was this a trick? A test? Some sick joke Eren was playing on the both of you? You didn’t know, but you were still too horny to care. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, after all.
“Daddy,” you mewled, locking eyes with Jean. “Wanna play with you.” Your hands cupped your breasts, massaging them as you grinded your hips on Eren’s, feeling his cock rock inside of you as you begged, “Please, Daddy, can I play with your cock too?”
“Wha-what?” He closed his eyes and shook his head, as if he were trying to wake himself from a dream, but when he opened them again, he saw you, hand now outstretched, looking so desperately at him. He took a cautious step closer, flicking his gaze to Eren to study his face.
“It’s okay, she’s into this kind of shit,” Eren jutted his chin toward you, his hands stilling your hips before smacking your thigh. “Aren’t you, baby?”
You nodded, biting your bottom lip as you stood and reached for Jean’s hand, taking it as you dropped to your knees in front of him.
“Whoa, uh, are you—are you sure about this?” He flashed his palms and as looked down at you, watching you already working to remove his jeans.
“Mhmm,” you hummed in response as your pressed your lip to his now exposed v-line. “Can I taste you, Daddy? Wanna put you in my mouth so bad . .”
He shuddered at your touch, watching intently as your slowly tugged down his pants, boxers and all, until his cock sprung free, bobbing in front of your face.
“Fuck, Daddy,” you licked your lips, squirming in anticipation at the sheer size of it. Eren’s size was more than satisfactory, but this was another level. “It’s so big,” you grabbed his hips, placing soft kisses along his his thigh as you looked up at him through your lashes, “Can I please play with you, Daddy? I’ll be such a good girl, I promise.”
“Oh my God, yes,” his hands ran through your hair before taking a small step back to kick off his bottoms and peel off his shirt. He took his cock in his hand, stroking it a few times before bringing it to your lips, flicking the tip onto your tongue as you exposed it, “Yes, you can baby. Oh fuck, you’re so fucking hot.”
“Grab her hair,” Eren spoke up from his spot on the couch, his eyes settled on the pair of you as he languidly stroked his member. “She’ll be dripping for you in no time if you fuck her face. Little bitch loves it.”
“Mmhmm,” you moaned as you took his length into your mouth, bobbing your head as you stroked him with your hand, spreading saliva along his shaft to help ease him down your throat.
“Holy shit, you’re so fucking good at that, baby,” he groaned, rocking his hips forward into your wet mouth, slowly helping you take his length as he fisted his hands into your hair. “Tap my leg when you need to breathe, okay?”
He took a moment to look down into your eyes, angling your chin up, so he knew you were hearing him. You thought you heard Eren scoff and you missed the way he rolled his eyes, but neither of you paid him any attention. When you nodded in agreement, he began sinking his cock deep into your throat, only hesitating when you gagged, but you pushed further, holding your breath as you took him nearly to the hilt.
His eyes rolled back as he quaked, his whole body shivering in pleasure as he tightened his grip on your hair, holding you there for a moment and then pulling your head back carefully, his cock exiting your lips with a pop as you sucked in a deep breath.
“You’re such a good girl, sweetheart,” he combed his fingers through your hair, guiding your lips back to his length, which you eagerly took into your mouth, eyes fixed on his, wanting to hear more of his sweet praise.
He watched you so intently, his mouth falling open into an ‘O’ as you hollowed your cheeks, fisting his length as you sucked and swirled your tongue around the tip.
“Fuck, fuck,” he held the back of your head, not guiding your motions, but just letting you set your own rhythm as he stared down, mesmerized by the way his cock disappeared into your throat. “FUCK,” his arms tensed, fingers grasping your hair tightly as you managed to suck his entire length down, feeling it fill your airway as you struggled to hold him there, contracting your throat around him.
“That’s my fucking girl,” Eren shifted in his seat, pumping his hand faster as he watched you squirm.
Tears sprung to your eyes as your lungs began to burn, your jaw becoming sore from the position it was in. You tapped at his thigh with two fingers and he immediately let go, cupping your face as you sputtered and panted for air.
“Are you all right?” He held your chin between his thumb and forefinger, “Just catch your breath. It’s okay, babygirl.”
“You’re real fuckin’ sweet aren’t you? In and outta the sack,” Eren stood, waltzing over and grabbing your hair harshly, tearing your gaze from Jean’s kind eyes and bringing them to focus on his cold, unforgiving orbs. “It’s a wonder how a guy like you never manages to bring any bitches home.”
Your throat was suddenly full again, gagging around Eren’s cock as he fully sheathed himself between your lips. Jean’s eyes widened as Eren scrutinized your pathetic expression, tears streaming down your cheeks as your hands braced his hips. He thrusted them forward, fucking into your throat as lewd squelching noises and the sound of you choking and pleading for a breath filled the air.
He finally relented, groaning loudly and yanking your head back by your hair as he smirked over at Jean, “She can take more than you think,” his fingers freed your tresses, opting to trail along your jaw, smearing the saliva pooling around your mouth as you chased your breath. “You wanna be used tonight, baby? Wanna get fucked until you can’t see straight?”
You nodded eagerly, folding your hands into your lap as you stared up at him, completely submissive to his will. Your pussy clenched around nothing, soaked and throbbing from the assault on your throat and his sinful words.
“See?” Eren stepped back, letting Jean take a step closer to you as you shifted your eyes to him, waiting for further instruction. “She’ll do damn near anything you want. I guarantee her pussy’s fucking soaked. Am I right, bitch? Fuckin’ show him how ready you are for that horse cock of his, if you want it so bad.”
You did as you were told, leaning back as you spread your legs, using two fingers to part your folds, swirling them around your entrance as you moaned, teasing yourself by slipping a single finger in. Jean winced, his cock twitching as his watched your ministrations, biting his lip to suppress a moan of his own.
“Fuck her, if you think you can satisfy her,” Eren smirked and took a seat on the smaller sofa, getting comfortable as he returned to stroking his own length.
“C’mere,” Jeans voice was still noticeably softer than Eren’s but it had an air of authority to it this time as he curled two fingers at you, while making his way to the couch.
He sat down, spreading his legs and patting his thighs as you padded over to him. Your hands rested on his shoulders as you straddled his lap, your knees on either side of his body as his cock stood at attention between you. You moved to stroke it, but he stopped you, clasping a hand around your wrist as his fingers slipped between you, reaching up to dip into your slick, groaning as he sank two fingers into you with ease.
“You’re so wet, baby,” he leaned forward, kissing your neck as he whispered, “you want me to fill you up, babygirl? Want me to fill this tight little pussy up, Hmm?”
You nodded, your breath already shaky when you wrapped an arm around his neck to steady yourself as his fingers started fucking up into you, “Please, Daddy.”
“Good girl,” he kissed your temple, swiping his thumb repeatedly over your clit as he rested his forehead against yours, trying to create a more intimate moment for the two of you while Eren groaned at the sight from the other couch. “I’ll make sure you feel good, baby, I promise.”
You felt your cheeks flush, a smile creeping across your face that you were grateful Eren couldn’t see from his angle. Jean tucked himself into the crook of your neck, opposite the side Eren could view, and tugged on your ear with his teeth as he whispered, “You’re beautiful, you know that?”
You took your lip between your teeth, flushing an even deeper shade of crimson that Jean was just able to see before his lips collided with yours, slow and sweet, as he sighed through his nose.
“Jean,” you kissed back needily, mumbling against his lips in a soft whine as he fingers sank deeper inside you.
“Is that his fucking name?” Eren barked and you corrected yourself, tensing against Jean, who grabbed your hip, rubbing his thumb against it as a soothing gesture.
“Daddy,” you whimpered, shifting your hips on top of his, “Please, fuck me, Daddy.”
“C’mere, babygirl,” he retracted his hand from your core, grasping beneath your thighs with two strong hands as he lifted you up and hovered you over his cock. “Go as slow as you need, okay?”
He held your waist as both your arms encircled his neck, pulling your torso closer to his as you captured his lips, kissing him deeply as you felt his tip push into you. You moaned as his tongue began exploring your mouth, his impressively thick cock stretching your walls so tightly around him as he choked out a groan, which became amplified as you clenched around him.
“‘Atta girl, baby, taking that fucking dick like a champ,” Eren growled, a sheen of sweat glistening on his torso as he stroked the head of his dick, eyes glued to the way your cunt was sucking in Jean’s massive cock, your juices dripping along the length that you had yet to take.
“Fuck, it’s so big, Daddy,” you whined, pushing a hand into his hair as you brought your torso flush with Jean, who ran a soothing hand up your spine shushing you quietly as he held the back of your neck.
“You can do it, baby,” he pressed a kiss just below your ear as he subdued the urge thrust upwards into you, closing his eyes tight as he let out a deep grunt when finally took all of him in.
“Oh my God,” you panted, feeling so incredibly full that you almost forgot where you were until his hands caught your hips, slowly guiding them up and down, the sensation driving you absolutely wild as you tightened your grip on his hair. “Faster, please, Daddy. Fuck, you feel so good inside me.”
“Shit, baby,” he complied without hesitation, helping you bounce on his lap, his cock carving space within your walls that you didn’t realize was there to claim. “Such a good fucking girl. You’re so fucking perfect, babygirl. Takin’ me so well like this,” his soft whispers of praise, swallowed by the moans you were exchanging, had you reeling.
His words, coupled with the glorious sensation of him being driven so deep inside you, rendered you useless for anything besides your fluttering pussy. Words failed you, any other thoughts escaped you. All you knew was the feeling of Jean beneath you, muttering such gentle coos of kindness while his hips mercilessly thrusted in time with yours, pushing him up against your womb over and and over and over again until your eyes rolled back, the pressure becoming too much from penetration alone. Your orgasm came on so suddenly that you almost didn’t recognize it’s arrival until you were spasming around him, choking out nonsensical streams of explicatives as your chest heaved, void of breath.
Eren stood, making his way over to you both on the couch as Jean held you tighter, rocking his hips beneath you as he fucked you through your release, his strong arms holding you steady as you lost all your senses.
“You. Lay down,” Eren nodded towards the far side of the couch and Jean reluctantly complied, groaning quietly while he picked up the both of you and turned, laying back as he kept you close to his chest. “Fuck yeah, that’s perfect. Keep fucking her and don’t you dare fucking cum yet, Kirstein.”
Eren settled one knee onto the couch, taking his stance behind you as he gripped your ass with both hands, striking each cheek suddenly, making you cry out as you looked behind you. His face was deceptively soft as he smiled at you, his palms rubbing the marks he’d left, feeling the jiggle of your ass each time Jean thrusted into you.
“You won’t mind if I take this tight little hole of yours, right, princess?” His thumb came to rest against your asshole, the tip of it nearly plunging in each time your hips came back against it. You mewled, watching in excitement as he slowly dipped a finger in, groaning at the slight sting. “Of course you don’t. Dumb little cocksleeve. You want both of your filthy holes stuffed full of cum tonight, don’t you, slut?”
“Yes, Sir,” you breathed, clinging to Jean tighter, whimpering in his ear as Eren added a second digit, slowly stretching your puckered hole with the excess fluid that had pooled around it from your sloppy cunt.
Jean groaned as he watched, moving his hips more slowly until they stilled to allow Eren to line himself up with your other entrance. A long string of saliva stretched from his lips as he spit onto his cock, spreading the fluid across his length as he slowly pushed inside of you.
“Oh, f-fuck,” you stuttered, nails digging into Jean as he hushed you with more of that honeyed praise that you’d come to crave.
“It’s okay, baby. Think of how good it’s gonna feel. You’re doing such a good job, princess.” A large hand started rubbing circles on your back while another tucked beneath your chin. “Hey, look at me.”
Your glassy eyes met Jean’s, a soft cry leaving your lips as he leaned in and swallowed it, kissing you gently as you moaned, feeling the first wave of pleasure hit you as Eren rolled his hips for the first time.
After that, he didn’t give you much more time to adjust. He set a steady pace right away, growling from behind you as he snapped his hips back and forth. Jean held himself still, his hands returned to your hips as he helped you met Eren’s thrusts. He panted heavily beneath you, his cock growing somehow harder inside you as you rocked along his length, a mixture of ‘yes, sir’s and ‘yes daddy’s being pounded out of your mouth and Eren picked up his rhythm.
“You like this, bitch? Like being used like a stupid little fuck toy?” He struck your ass hard, not bothering to wait for a response before he did it again, even harder. “Like feeling useful to me for once, you fucking whore?”
“Yes! Ah—fuck, Sir! Yes, yes, yes,” you propped yourself up by a hand on either side of Jean’s face, shoving your hips back harder against both of their cocks as you begged, teetering on the edge of another orgasm. “C-cum inside me, p-please. Oh, pretty please, Sir. Wan’all your cum, please. Use me, Sir, fucking use me all y’want.”
Jean stared up at your fucked out face, losing his ability to hang out as he exploded inside of you, his hips stuttering as he took over thrusting for you, fucking his hot load deeper into your greedy cunt while Eren’s cock rutted against his inside of you, pulsing as he neared his own high.
“Tell me who fucking owns you, you stupid bitch,” one last harsh strike feel on your behind as Eren’s grip on your ass became brutal, fingers digging into your soft flesh.
“You, Sir!” You yelped, locking eyes with him as you looked back, your mouth hanging open as you struggled to keep your focus while your body wracked with pleasure, sending convulsions through you as you cried out in complete ecstasy.
“You’re damn right.” His eyes fell into a hooded daze as he followed suit, pouring his sticky sweet substance deep into you and thrusting a few more times before he pulled out, marveling at the way it poured back out of you. “Dammit, baby, you look so fuckin’ good like this.”
He leaned down, soothing one cheek with his palm as he pressed a kiss to the other before he sat back on the other end of the couch, allowing you the room to sit up and off of Jean, who held your hand as your legs wobbled. He sprung up to steady you, hands holding your hips as you regained your composure, catching your breath as you stumbled on unsure legs towards Eren, who caught your waist and pulled you down into his lap.
“Thank you, baby,” he smiled, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear as he leaned down to kiss the top of your head while your eyes fluttered closed. “You did so good for us. Gonna help clean you up and take you to bed with me, okay?”
Jean stood and began gathering his clothes, suddenly feeling awkward in his post-nut clarity as he watched your embrace. He felt a twinge of jealousy as he witnessed you nuzzle into Eren’s chest, a small, soft smile on your lips.
“Love you,” it was barely a whisper, but Jean heard you mutter the words against Eren’s neck as you placed a kiss to it, and he wished that he hadn’t.
But more than that, he wished that he hadn’t looked over to see Eren’s smug grin. He was staring straight at Jean, eyes narrowed as he spoke in the softest voice that he had ever heard him use as he drew lazy circles against the skin of your shoulder.
“Love you too, baby.”
Without another word, Eren stood, lifting you and carrying you effortlessly into his bedroom. He laid you down on the bed, pressing a kiss to your cheek as he whispered in your ear that he would be right back to take care of you.
Jean was tugging his boxers back up when Eren reappeared, stepping in front of his door, so that he could quietly close it behind him, lest you should hear what he had to say.
“Did you enjoy yourself?” He seemed almost bored when he asked the question, crossing his arms over his broad chest.
“Uh, yeah, guess so,” Jean shrugged, silently wishing that the conversation would end right there.
“Good, I’m glad you had a good time,” he wandered closer, looking disinterested as ever. “ Because, I want you to understand something. Now that you know exactly what you’re missing,” Eren came to stand toe-to-toe with him, eyes hard as he spat his next words. “You should also know that you’ll never have her.”
Jean narrowed his eyes, jaw unhinging to protest, but he was cut off by more of Eren’s venom-laced words.
“Save it. I’ve seen the way you look at her. I’ve heard you moaning her name while you stroke your dick alone in your room like the bitch that you are. I know all the details about your pathetic little crush on her.”
Jean looked away, unable to find the words to counter Eren’s verbal assault, because he couldn’t feasibly deny a single word.
“That’s what I fucking thought. You couldn’t even help yourself from sweet-talking her while I was right fuckin’ there. Well, now you don’t gotta wonder what her cunt feels like anymore. How good she feels pressed up against you. What a good girl she really is. Now you know. I bet she’s everything you hoped for and then some, huh? Sure hope you’re able to get over her for your sake, because if you so much as breathe in her general direction again, I will fucking end you. Got it?”
Jean grit his teeth, shaking with anger, but unwilling to challenge him as Eren stared him down, “Got it.”
With a smug expression, Eren spun on his heel, tossing a half-hearted salute over his shoulder, not bothering to look back at Jean, “Have fun fuckin’ your fist from now on.”
five hundred years ago, a pair of immortal twins saved the world of teyvat from collapse with the help of its gods: the seven archons. as a result, they bestowed their powers upon the twins and crowned them the rulers of their kingdom, celestia. then, they disappeared from history, never to be seen or heard from again.
fast forward to five hundred years later, you are a mercenary living in the woods unknowingly rescued the twin rulers from thieves. indebted to you through this action, they offered you a position in their kingsguard. now a royal soldier, castle life takes time getting used to, especially when there have been threats made against the royals. you are tasked to find the source of those threats, and so far you suspect the various visitors that have stepped foot inside and decide whether they are either friend or foe.
will you be able to save the world from the forces of evil? or will it finally collapse — its supposed fate from five hundred years ago?
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princeps cretaceus [albedo] - social interactions are not his forte and so are assassinations… or are they? several servants claim to witness him attempt to assassinate the twins, having him enlist you to help him clear his name.
taurus iracundus [arataki itto] - the mighty mercenary leader has a bounty on his head for the recent robberies and kidnappings. you don’t believe he’s behind this, so you’ll have to punch the truth out of him… literally.
monoceros caeli [childe] - the self-proclaimed diplomat is a terrible liar. in fact, he isn’t a diplomat at all. when his brother sneaks in for a visit, he dumps all his elder sibling responsibilities to you to hide what he really is.
noctua [diluc] - politics are the least of his worries, except when they concern the knights of favonius. it’s suspicious that his views align with a vigilante named the darknight hero, so you decide to investigate the matter for yourself.
aphros delos [eula] - the townspeople become even more upset with her due to her uncle conspiring with an enemy. to prove her trustworthiness, you must learn aristocratic etiquette from her to stop his evil schemes.
canis bellatoris [gorou] - a certain guuji takes advantage of his adorable appearance to promote her works. you find it strangely convenient somehow that the targets on your list are attending the event by being drawn in by his alter ego.
leo minor [jean] - work is always in her mind. her knights are concerned about her health, not to mention her sister. they task you to distract her during work while setting up a surprise party for her.
acer palmatum [kaedehara kazuha] - the infamous crux fleet is hosting a clash for the strongest warriors in the kingdom. the grand prize goes missing, so you and the newest addition have to chase after the culprit.
pavo ocellus [kaeya] - the cavalry captain is full of secrets, so it’s uncharacteristic of him to share one of his. his favor looks nothing more than a treasure hunt, but that’s just a scratch on the surface. what’s he up to exactly?
cypressus custos [kamisato ayato] - the royal ball is a rare occasion where the young lord is seen in public. it’s also a good hiding place for enemies. you agree to act as his spy to prevent a potential massacre from happening.
dracaena somnolenta [sangonomiya kokomi] - the divine priestess gets tired easily. her general states that she likes books, so you buy her favorites. upon entering her room, she’s been waiting for you in the most unexpected way.
rubeum scutum [thoma] - soldiers from house kamisato love to criticize his special treatment by the family. he doesn’t mind, but you can clearly see that they’ve been troubling him, especially when his past is brought up.
alatus [xiao] - the vigilant yaksha is posing as a soldier to meet you, the mercenary who fought a beast alone. rumor has it that demons have occupied the castle, and he has to risk his identity to make this fateful encounter happen.
historia antiqua [zhongli] - a monster that was thought to disappear centuries ago mysteriously appeared to destroy the kingdom. while you search for ways to defeat them, a certain historian makes himself known from the shadows.
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inspired by fire emblem: three houses and based on my royal au headcanon: within these castle walls.since i reached 2k+ followers, the installments are planned to be around 2k words each. but maybe i could make them longer hehehe.
all these installments are inspired by their story quests (5* + kaeya) and hangout events (4*). if you haven’t done some of them, refrain from reading those to avoid spoilers. they’re not connected in any way, but they’re still part of the same universe.
the characters on my list are the same ones from my headcanon. however, i could always add more (dainsleif, scaramouche, yelan, etc.). i may or may not have roles for them already lol.
i’ll be graduating next month, so this will be worked on during the summer! let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!
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. yay, it’s my birthday! well… in three hours. and guess what? it’s jean’s birthday, too! i haven’t written in a while, so why not give a headcanon as a present to myself.
. he sketches you all the time, but hasn’t gathered enough courage to show you them. for his gift, it’s a portrait of you smiling and laughing. you begin to tear up of how beautiful it is, to which he confesses that the first time you expressed those emotions there was when he fell in love with you.
. not one normal person would gift you onikabuto and miss hina trading cards, but you appreciate his efforts nonetheless. this year, he takes you to a cliff where he holds a talent show with his gang. as he’s about to perform his birthday song, the tenryou commission appears to chase after the two of you. it turns out the cliff is private property, and he didn’t see the signs.
. celebrations are always lively at her ship. her connections with wanmin restaurant and liquor merchants allow her to prepare a feast just for you. as it’s your special day, she’ll let you be captain, giving you permission to sail wherever you want to go. you and her crew know too well that she’ll go all out on the drinks and become too drunk to handle her duties.
. just for one day, he doesn’t want to do anything related to the fatui so he can spend time with you in peace. throughout the dinner with you and his family, the both of you sense a presence outside, excusing yourselves to take care of “business” — agents from another organization who you took down a while ago. maybe some celebrations aren’t meant to be peaceful after all.
. romantic dinners are the best dreams to come true; no need for extravagant parties. having one at the balcony of dawn winery, with candles burning brightly and each person holding wine in one hand, you make a toast with your significant other to another good year ahead. afterwards, he’ll take you to the living room, dancing to each other’s heartbeats.
. as she had celebrated her birthday alone in the past, she isn’t used to someone else holding her hand and being dragged around the city, spewing laughs for such a special day as yours. when you ask her if she wants to stop, she shakes her head. when her special day comes, she wants to feel free with you.
. working all day and night, she didn’t find time to buy you a present. instead, she bakes you a qingxin flower cake, and a messily attempt at that. yet she hides it behind her back, thinking that you won’t appreciate it. you happen to see it, which makes you want to try it. she sighs in relief to hear you say you really like it, and now she’s obligated to bake one for you every year.
. you didn’t think it’s possible for someone else being more excited than yourself in celebrating your special day. the morning of, he’ll hunt for fresh fish and crabs at the beach. at night after his patrol, he’ll prepare a banquet in front of a bonfire, rousing sparks of jealousy. they wish to be dedicated and loving as the general for their future significant others.
. it’s not the spooky season yet, but she never fails to bring its energy to everyday life, and your birthday is no exception. after her shift, she takes you to wuwang hill just to stargaze, which she keeps on insisting. you don’t trust everything she says, but you still get pranked by her, using her ghost to disguise as her to make you think she’s “gone”.
. the guildmaster has many hidden talents, and one of which is singing. she gets embarrassed if someone hears her sing. everyone assumes that you did, but that’s a misconception. for your birthday, you finally hear her for the first time in forever after annoying her for so long. to your surprise, she really has a nice voice.
. being the poet that he is, it’s no surprise that a haiku will be his gift. yet every single time he recites one, you fall in love with him all over again. he doubts his creativity in this one in particular but you insist that it’s the best he’s ever made so far, thanking him with a kiss. you would’ve never thought to see him so flustered.
. for someone who talks a lot to charm his way into someone else’s affairs, he greets you with a few words and a sliver of a smile. he doesn’t want to ruin your special day. but how can that be if he’s the reason your life has gotten so much better? as soon as he feels your reassurance, he reverts back to being a tease. your special day won’t be special without him.
. she manages to find out your birthday from the housekeepers in advance so she could make your gift extra special. she initially thinks that an expensive one would be suitable to your liking, but begins to have second thoughts. she decides to take you to chinju forest, a place not too far from the estate and where she’ll perform her fan dance.
. (kind of?) salty that his retainer chose to spend his birthday with the traveler instead of him and his sister, he doesn’t give you the liberty to act on your own today — he wants you for himself until then. while he pampers you with his peculiar cooking, you think of ways to fool him to escape. however, outsmarting him won’t do, because he’ll catch you in the end anyway. send help, aha.
. learning an important lesson from the traveler to rest every now and then, she requests time off from work for the first time in a while to make you a present. she gives you a lantern which looks ordinary, but it runs on electro energy and stays lit indefinitely. she tells you that it serves as a reminder of her being an extra light in your life, and you in hers.
. spending the majority of her time tending to her duties as a general, she’s unsure how to celebrate birthdays other than her own properly. on yours she immediately skips the formalities and goes straight to the point by asking you if you have a birthday wish. not only will she grant you one, but five, her lucky number. it’s cute that she’s trying her best, and you happily accept her offer.
. when you first started working under the tianquan, you were intimidated by her presence. once you get to know her, she’s a generous and kind lady; for instance, giving you a super expensive gift for your birthday. they’re brocades, which you can use to make your clothes. as someone who has never learned how to sew before, she’ll gladly teach you how to do it.
. ah, don’t mind the shogun; she won’t hurt you! the electro archon finally accepts that time goes forward and she must go along with it. ever since the cataclysm, you celebrated alone, but now she’s at your side with a bundle of tricolor dango in her hand. it’s the modern age of inazuma, where the both of you can pursue eternity in a different way together.
. as expected of the resident strategist of the sangonomiya resistance, she has already planned out everything for your birthday, even noting the possible changes of the weather. one thing she hasn’t done since the war is swimming at the pools of the island, so she takes you there for a dive in the morning. the shrine maidens are glad to see her having fun as she sprays water at you.
. her master tells her about the importance of birthdays and also notes that humans in particular highly appreciate materialistic things. as someone who isn’t really fond of them, she takes you to her favorite place in the world — the mountains, where you can see the beautiful view of the sky. her way of celebrating your day is way better than any physical present.
. he’s friendly… too friendly. he practically invited the entire city, recommending them to bring any of their signature foods and drinks for your celebration. you told him you wanted a small party, but never mind that; he worked too hard for this. oh, yeah! a party hosted by thoma isn’t one if the hotpot game isn’t included, which is quite dreadful to say the least.
. despite not being an experienced baker, he attempts to bake a cake for you because someone once told him that you’re supposed to eat one on birthdays. it’s apple-flavored, his favorite! an amateur in baking, the cake doesn’t look like an actual cake — more like an apple pie. regardless, you did enjoy it. in addition, he allows you to request to have him sing a song as you eat.
. he doesn’t celebrate birthdays because he doesn’t understand their concept, stating that they’re redundant. yet he still gives you a gift before going off on your journey — a butterfly emblem created from leaves. he says it’s an adepti amulet that staves off evil. so no matter where you go, the object will protect you from harm every step of the way.
. she isn’t a big fan of celebrating such festivities because people would merely come to her for her blessings instead of using their time for other things, as their visits disrupt her leisure time. since you’re her significant other, she’ll give you special treatment (for a minute before kicking you out of the shrine). she won’t admit it, but she’s happy to see you and wishes for a fruitful year ahead.
. she’s the definition of lively… and disastrous. you’re still unsure whether lighting up fireworks is a great idea because she got caught by the tenryou commission (again) for “illegal activity”. however, that doesn’t stop her from making you the best birthday present ever. as she begins to light up the fireworks, you could hear the footsteps of the soldiers trying to contain the incoming chaos.
. as old-fashioned as he is, he gifts you a dried glaze lily. he says that it bears the beautiful memories and prayers of the nation. afterwards, he connects it to another story of a god whose eyes fell upon the love of their life, and then a field of glaze lilies bloom. unbeknownst to you, it’s about you and him, when the two of you first met.
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A/N:once again, I forget I can make Headcanons lol. If you’d like to see more characters, feel free to comment or send me an ask!
Eren
Starting with the basics, is he a dom, sub or switch. Depending on his partner I think it changes, so I’d say Eren is a switch
100% a masochist, he loves when his partner hurts him
This also means he’s into impact play & degrading
I see Eren liking the idea of CNC — it goes either way so long as his partner is comfortable with it
I can also see Eren being very selfish in bed just so he can be punished. When he’s in the mood to be a sub, he’s 100% a brat with a loud mouth
Impact play. Once again, it goes both ways. He likes seeing your ass red from his slaps but he also enjoys when you smack him across the face
He’s absolutely a rope bunny, tie him up & restrain him and it drives him wild. Especially if you are teasing or edging him.
Cuckholding. He likes to use it as a form of punishment so long as you are comfortable. So either he’ll watch you fuck someone else orhe’ll make you watch him fuck someone else
He is a creampie kinda man. He refuses to cum anywhere else but inside of you. Not even your mouth, unless you want him to.
Breeding kink — but he also doesn’t want the consequences. So that’s a tough one buddy.
He has… a mommy / daddy kink. He’ll call his partner either name — whichever they prefer
Aftercare is a big thing for him!! He feels a bit guilty when he is the one on top cause he doesn’t go easy with you
Mikasa
So, is she a dom, sub or switch? I think Mikasa leans more towards being submissive. Which seems very out of character for her in any situation other than sex.
She has a thing for praising, she’ll be putty in your hands if you tell her she’s a good girl & stuff like that
Loves overstimulation, she’ll beg you to stop but really she wants you to keep going
Mikasa has a breeding kink, I’m not even sorry.
Sucker for gags and ropes, she likes being restrained and used. But she also gets excited when the roles are reversed
Speed round; Agrexophilia, breast worship and cunnilingus
I see Mikasa liking collars y’all, maybe even some bows or cute lingerie
To go along with her fascination with cunnilingus, she loves face sitting
She likes group sex so long as she is the center of attention, she gets jealous if her partner is paying attention to someone else
She likes sex in unconventional places, somewhere where her partner has to work for it. Like a public place, the bathtub, against a wall, etc etc
While she isn’t that dominant in bed, she doesn’t mind if her partner refers to her as miss, madam, mommy, etc.
Aftercare is a huge thing for her, she doesn’t want the love and praise to end after you are both satisfied.
Armin
Dom, sub or switch? Armin can be a switch if he really wants to be, but he much prefers being dominant
This man will gaslight you in bed, he’s huge on degrading and humiliation
Dacryphilia. He wants to see you sobbing, he’ll even encourage it
Impact play & choking. He’s super rough with both things, he’ll only stop if you are about to pass out
Armin sees sex as a way to relieve his pent up stress, it’s the only time he can really show his true colors. He has a reputation to keep after all.
Possessive as fuck, he will make you repeat his name over and over while he fucks you. Saying things like “who do you belong to?” And all that.
Breeding kink with risks and consequences welcomed. He sees it as another way to show people who you belong to.
Which brings us to… creampies. His cum is priceless & needs to be earned. Why waste it by putting it anywhere else.
Though, if you don’t please him, he’s into face fucking. Either way, his cum is only being put inside of you
Objectification & dumbification. He likes the idea of a master / pet dynamic in bed
Body worship but only receiving, it’s part of his humiliation tactics
Doesn’t really have a thing for pet names, prefers hearing his name leave your lips
Aftercare is important to him once everything is said and done. He needs you to know he loves you after…
Jean
Y’all know the drill by now, this man is a jealous switch.
It really depends on his partner & what they lean more towards
Jean always feels the need to prove himself, so he’s all about body worship, praising and overstimulation.
Would happily die suffocated by your thighs & begs for you to sit on his face.
He drools when he gets really into it, I’m talking just as cock drunk as you are while he fucks you
Breeding kink but more so creampies. He wants to see his cum oozing out of you
Super into Agrexophilia, not only does it turn him on but it boosts his ego tenfold
Likes when you call him sir & when you try to talk to him while he’s pleasuring you.
He’s into impact play but only as punishment.
Cuckolding, he loves and hates the humiliation he feels watching someone else fuck you.
Anal sex. He grows a fascination for it pretty quickly after the first time y’all try it.
After care isn’t super huge for him only because the two of you are pretty fucking tired after the fact. Y’all are knocked out within 5 minutes of finishing
Sasha
Sasha is a sub but will occasionally be a switch
She is huge, and I mean huge on incorporating food into sex. I’m not trying to be cliche here.
Like her favorite thing is being able to put whip cream on her partner’s genitals and eating them out / sucking them off. It’s such a reward in her mind
She’s obsessed with oral sex, she prefers to give rather than revive but she loves reviving as well
Loves bondage & being tied up
Thrives off of praise and pet names, any word of encouragement gets her going
Role play. I don’t really have an explanation for this one.
She’s absolutely a pleaser, anything that will earn her praise and encouragement
She isn’t against creampies, but she prefers if her partner comes on her or in her mouth
Breathplay & breast worship are two secret favorites, she’s a bit embarrassed of both
Sasha really gets into dirty talk, both hearing it and speaking it
Similar to Jean, after care isn’t a huge deal because she is knocking the fuck out within 5-10 minutes of finishing. As long as she isn’t too hungry
Connie
Starts off as a sub! He usually lets his partner take the lead until he gets a bit of confidence. Once he has a basic understanding and knows what you like. Connie is a dom.
This man is horny 24/7 and is eager to learn as much as he can. He wants to be good and satisfying you but he also wants to know what he likes
Absolutely loves oral sex — he will spend hours eating is partner out or sucking them off
He’s into CNC, this goes both ways though. So if we really wanna be technical, this man is a switch
Not a fan of blindfolds or Gags, he uses your facial expressions and noises to know how good he’s doing
Creampie addict
Body worship is huge with him, he loves giving it. But receiving it? He could come just from your praises
Prefers rough sex with passion over slow sex. He’s eager to please and doesn’t have the patience for slow sex
Man is a cervix bruiser, he is rough when he gets inside of you, he loves seeing tears stream down your face.
Not that into dirty talk — honestly it makes him laugh
Breeding kink? He is obsessed with coming inside of you & gladly welcomes any consequences. Honestly he kinda wants it to happen
Aftercare is important but not a priority. He’s going to clean you up and cuddle you, but he’s also fighting to stay awake.
↪ content; canon universe, description of violence, season 4, reincarnation!au, heavy angst
Was it three? Four? Jean didn’t really count how many years had passed since the last time he saw you. It was the happiest day of his life when he finally married the woman of his dreams, the first love from his previous lifetime, and his forever more in this one, too. How romantic. To love the same person over and over again.
The venue was decorated so prettily, and he wanted to thank you along with his wife for creating such a blast. You were the best wedding organiser out there, at least to him, you were. Ever since he bumped into you inside the antique bookshops, spending about five years with you as a dear friend, he knew he could count on you.
So imagine his surprise when there was only your assistant idling around by the end of the day. With a folder in her hand and a notebook with your handwritten tucked inside. Something for him. Just him, not the others, and of course not for Mikasa.
He needed time to understand the reason. Reading page by page for a bazillion of times since he was afraid he missed some information. He hoped you hinted where you would go or what you were going to do in between the lines as his heart skipped a beat faster. Thinking that maybe you tried to say something.
But even after he read it every day before he fell asleep, Jean learned nothing from it except a little fairy tale that was now engraved in his brain.
There was a little girl. So naïve — not knowing what kind of danger lingered outside the wall.
Walls. Titans. Such a bizarre story you had written there. About survival, friendship, different beliefs and so many more condensed into your notebook. There were some sentences he felt so familiar with, especially when the girl interacted with her best friend. Some promises, the banter and how they teased each other.
Jean had a smile plastered on his face every time he read it, as if he was reminiscing some old memories. One that he could never forget with how precious it was to him.
One that he eventually did without him being aware of it.
“I am ready now.” Turning around, he couldn’t help but wolf-whistle when he saw how gorgeous his wife was. “Do I look good?” She twirled around, raven hair floating in the air as she showed off her emerald body-con dress, hugging her body so perfectly.
“Babe, all men would be jealous of me to have you in my arms.” He let out a small chuckle and pressed a deep kiss on her lips, leaving a wet smack sound when he pulled away. “Let’s go then. I am betting the others are waiting.”
Mikasa Ackerman, now Mikasa Kirstein. The smugness on his face every time he remembered how his friend gawked at him never faltered. Even after years went by, he was still proud of having such a pretty lady to be called as his wife. The days that went by felt like he was newly wed all over again since she never once changed.
Something that made him want to wake up every morning, knowing how perfect his life was. Yes, perfect. But not complete, never complete.
Jean didn’t know what else he needed. He had a wife that loved him so, a stable job in such a prestigious law firm, and an adorable dog that had become their kid for the last couple of years. Marco once told him that maybe he wanted a baby, but even when he knew Mikasa could not bear children, he didn’t feel disappointed at all.
That was what made him decide to travel around the world in his free time. Taking his wife with him as they went on a random journey every time. He tried to find the meaning of life, what could have possibly made him whole. Some said he needed to be grateful. He did, he always did, with what the world had bestowed upon him.
Yet, after a few years went by, and he still had that gap in his days, he ended up taking it as some kind of redemption, perhaps an atonement over his sin in the past life.
“Goodness, is that Sasha?” Mikasa pointed at someone who was now standing in front of the restaurant with her husband, Niccolo, right beside her. “She smuggled something inside her bag. She never changed, Jean.” A small giggle slipped from her lips, followed by a deep chuckle from him as he parked the car.
A reunion. Just a small one in between him, Connie, Sasha, and Marco. The golden quartet, you once said. And the four of them thought it had become a quintet ever since he brought you into his house and introduced you to them. But now, it was back to just them, never once changed as no one actually fitted in as easily as you.
Taking a deep breath, he felt a shiver down his spine the second he was out of his car. Winter was never kind to those who went out, they knew that, but it wouldn’t be them if they were not being stubborn. After all, three years had passed ever since Marco moved to New Zealand, and since he was coming back, they had to celebrate.
The second he went inside the restaurant with his wife, a loud cheer from Connie and Sasha resonated throughout the place, making some pairs of eyes turn to face him. Mikasa could only chuckle at that, always loving the warm atmosphere every time the two rascals were around before she pushed Jean to get them.
He didn’t waste a time and just ruffled his best friends, feeling so light as he felt like this was the only moment he felt almost complete. When their friends surrounded him, tears pricked the corner of their eyes from too much laughing, making fun of each other to no end to the point they were embarrassing each other.
And for a split second, he thought about how everything could be much better if you were still around. If only you were not gone without a trace.
“Starting the reunion without me?” A smooth, angelic tone that belonged to the only sane person in the group stopped them from killing each other. “I thought we were here to celebrate my return. Guess not, huh?”
“Oh, come here Mr Bodt!”
The husband and wives of the quartet knew it was time for them to enjoy their time, giving their loved ones some moment to reminisce about life. Three years wasn’t short for Jean, Marco, Connie and Sasha, who used to spend their time together for probably the first fifteen years of their life since elementary school.
Jean felt like the night was perfect. The fact that one of his best friends returned to Paradis was also a plus. Knowing they could hang out like they used to, having back the routine he once lost, maybe after this, he would feel complete.
And oh, he felt exactly that. He felt in every fibre of his being the second Marco leaned away and cleared his throat to reveal someone else that went with him to the reunion, someone that Jean thought would never see again.
There was you, in all your glory. With the same smile he remembered the last time he saw your face. He couldn’t move his body, lips slightly parted as he thought his eyes deceived him. You were here. You were coming back to them, to his life.
He wasn’t able to grasp whatever Marco said as the ravenette patted your shoulders. His pupil followed you around, looking at how you kissed Sasha’s cheeks and tried to calm her down since she was crying by now. Connie just had his jaw dropped to the ground, saying no way! repeatedly underneath his breath as it grew louder and louder.
You fitted back in so easily. Just like that. Here again as if you never left in the first place. There were so many questions he wanted to ask, so many things he wondered. Jean felt happy, fuming, hurt, all at the same time because he longed to see you, to have you in his life. He had lost you once before. He didn’t want to lose you again.
“Hello, Jean.” You waved your hand in front of his face, snapping him out of his reverie. “How are you? I saw Mikasa before. She’s as pretty as ever! Bet you have been treating her right with how much she glows.”
“Oh, you know me.” Of course you did. He didn’t need to explain or say much since you were the one who knew him best, after all. “I always treat those I love with everything I can give to them, anyway.”
The missing piece of the puzzle appeared out of nowhere. Slipping back into his life and making his time searching for it came to waste. It was you. Always did from the first moment he tugged your wrist. The person who was so important that he felt like he had lost something when you were gone without a trace.
You kept your hands on your lap as you sat beside him, with Marco on the other side as he asked what you wanted to order. Jean couldn’t help himself but pointed at some dishes on the menu, things that he felt so sure you liked. If those four years you went missing didn’t change you, you would pick one of his recommendations.
And the night rolled on without a hitch. No one thought it was weird to see another lady in between the rowdy quartet. Yes, you always belonged there. Not even one spouse thought you weren’t supposed to be among them.
Sometimes Connie and Sasha would ask what you had been doing. After all, even though you could click right in with them so easily, they were still curious about what happened in the vast gap of years they missed you. Whether you were happy, whether you missed them too, whether you found someone —
And when you smiled and glanced in hisdirection. The two immediately kept their lips curled into a soft smile.
They didn’t need to ask more. They understood without you needing to elaborate with words. But Jean? He did. He needed to hear you spell it out for him.
However, when stupid banter and over the top jokes replaced the somewhat serene atmosphere from before, he stopped himself. Maybe he could ask you later when the two of you were alone. You were always more open around him, and he hoped a few years apart didn’t change that part.
It was almost ten, and they were the only crowd who stayed in this restaurant. The only customer left. Marco felt like it was time for them to end the night, much to everyone’s dismay, since tomorrow was Monday anyway.
They had to get enough sleep so they wouldn’t get hazy in the morning for work. At the reminder of that, the rest of the group could only groan and nodded, dispersing to get fresh air since there was some alcohol flowing in their blood.
Jean thanked Mikasa for accompanying him, smiling all the way to his ears when she gave him a kiss and told him she would be the one who drove. It was really nice indeed, a surprising night since he didn’t expect you to be here again, to appear with his best friend and grace him with your presence that was long gone.
Walking towards the balcony, he lit his cigarette to clear his mind. And lady luck seemed to be on his side tonight the moment he saw you leaned in at the railing with a glass of water in your hand.
“I thought you were going home.”
“Hm? Not yet, Jean.”
He leaned his back on the railing, puffing out some greyish smoke into the air. Five feet apart, because he knew you disliked the smell of the burned cigarette.
You didn’t even turn to face him. Not a gesture of surprise could be seen as he stepped inside your space. He wondered what you were thinking, and most importantly, he wanted to know why you came back after all those years.
“I read your notebook every day.” But if he wanted you to tell him everything. He needed to play his card right. “Before I sleep. Every day, ever since I received it.”
Jean didn’t let you question his commitment. Clarifying what he had done for the last four years. He wanted you to know how much your existence meant to him, and how the past years without you there had been consuming him little by little. Even though you were just his best friend, he cherished you as much as he did for his wife.
“I see.” He glanced at you, wanting to see your reaction. You only twirled the mineral water around, not even an ounce of emotion changed your neutral visage. “What do you think, then?”
“It was heartbreaking.”
“Of course. It’s not really about rainbow and—”
“But also nostalgic, in a way.”
Your pupils dilated at his words. There, the exact emotion that he couldn’t fathom. You stopped responding; you stopped whatever words you wanted to say and merely — existed. Hell, sometimes he thought you didn’t even breathe when you were like this. “I wanted to ask you something. No, a lot of things, actually.”
As he took a step closer towards you, it almost made him falter when he saw the way you leaned away. Four years have changed you. He was aware of that. But he still needed you to clarify something, if that was possible. He just needed to know why. He wanted to know what he did wrong for you to leave him in the dust.
Not just him. Connie and Sasha would often ask where you were, and if everything was alright while Marco comforted them. The three of them would be crazy thinking about your whereabouts if only the ravenette didn’t calm them down.
“It’s late, Jean.” You took a deep breath, shutting your eyes for a second there before it laid upon him. “We can talk tomorrow. I am going to move here again so we can catch up anytime we want.” That smile on your face. He frowned when he realised it didn’t reach your eyes. “After all, your wife waited for you, right?”
It felt like he had been in this place before. In the same situation where he was so close to knowing, to learn about something between you and him, and yet it always dispersed into nothing as you assured him he shouldn’t be worried about it.
As if you didn’t want him to know. As if you tried to hinder him from finding out the truth.
“Why did you always push me away…?”
He sounded so broken when he threw the question, and you gaped at how vulnerable the intonation that lingered there. “Do you know something? Have you seen any memories from the past? Is it that badwith me?”
“Jean, no. I—” You wanted to calm him down. Your palm was hovering right in front of his chest, but you stopped yourself. It looked like you were scared to touch him. “I can’t. Please know that I can’t talk about this. There’s a reason and maybe one day you could understand. But I hope you didn’t. I really hope you neverdid.”
“So you actually see the past.” He snorted in disbelief. All those times he tried to tell you about the awakened memories. All those years, he thought you were clueless and just another normal human being. It was a lie. “Then you know? On my wedding day, I was so close to see it through but you didn’t let me, you — you lied to me!”
“Jean!”
“And why is that, huh? Am I turned out to be such a despicable person? Is that the reason you moved away, telling no one about it?!”
“No! You don’t understand! The past few years also tortured me! But I did it because I must evade you, Jean. I did it for you—”
“Everything’s okay?”
The two heads whipped towards the source of the voice. Marco raised one of his eyebrows before scrunching his forehead since he would never have thought to see you and Jean having a heated argument. “It’s late. I think both of you drank too much liquor. If there’s something you both need to talk about, I suggest tomorrow.”
He strode right beside you, standing so close, as if he tried to shield you from Jean. The taller man could only look down at his best friend with disbelief before grumbling a bit underneath his breath.
A ravenette, always a ravenette. The one who blocked him from unravelling his own memory was Mikasa back then, and now it was Marco.
“Fine, then.”
“Good. I am sure Mikasa is waiting for you, too.”
Marco smiled at him, and the tension Jean felt slowly lifted off his shoulder. His best friend was right, he had to go back since Mikasa had been so kind to wait for him. What a perfect woman indeed, and he gave a small nod towards the freckled man.
From your words, you were really going to stay here again. So if by chance he could grab a coffee with you, he would continue this conversation then. Completely sober because he didn’t want to mess things up. “We will see you later, Jean. Goodnight.”
“Yeah, pal. Good—”
“You know, Jean?” He was barely done replenishing the gas for his manoeuvring gear when Marco sat beside him. “I think you are not really in love with Mikasa.”
“What?” Jean stopped what he did. All the shouts of excitement from another cadet were muted as he could only hear his best friend’s voice. Marco had the audacity to have a smirk on his face, not facing him still as he fixed his boots. “Oi, how come you say that?”
“Because it’s the truth. You actually put your heart in your sleeve, Jean.”
Jean immediately stood from where he sat, forcing the freckled boy to look at him because of his abrupt movement. He didn’t know where the ravenette got that idea from. And surely he didn’t expect him to say it now when they were going to climb back on top of the wall after retaking the headquarters. Couldn’t he wait to discuss this? Something as — important as his heart?
“No, I am not.” He jutted his lips out, something that only elicited a chuckle from his best friend. Something that made Jean scowl even more now. “I adore her entire existence, Marco. She is the prettiest woman out there. So brave and the greatest soldier in our ranks. Shit, even when all she could think of was Eren, I still want her!”
“Are you really?” Those light brown orbs fixated on someone behind him, one that he immediately followed since he wanted to know what Marco had been trying to say to him.
Sasha slumped herself towards you, practically crying and wailed some gratitude on your chest. You were not even trying to get her off you, understanding how shocked she would have been since a titan almost got her. If you were not there to kill the one she was assigned to before, maybe Sasha wouldn’t even be here right now.
You and your gentle nature, so nurturing to those around but at the same time could be such a clown around them. Jean only let out a small chuckle at the sight of the two girls, and when you realised he had been looking at you, he could feel his cheeks heated.
But he didn’t look away, not feeling embarrassed that you caught him, not at all.
“I couldn’t really hide things from you, huh, Marco?” He whispered out underneath his breath, just enough for the ravenette to hear him. “Since when did you know about it?”
“Since the first day, maybe.” Turning around, he faced Marco once again, who was now down with the preparation. “You always talked about her, telling me about her stupid antics. And of course, that soft smile on your face, Jean.”
“Yeah, can’t help it when she always makes me feel like I am…” He chuckled. The smile reached his eyes in the middle of this hellish time from just the thought of you. “…whole.”
Jean didn’t want anyone to know, actually. About how he was secretly in love with his best friend, someone who knew him like the back of their hand. He once asked Connie to nudge the idea of him liking you, but the bald boy said you only fake gagged and walked away, a sign that Jean took for him to take a step back.
The world only needed to know that Mikasa Ackerman rejected him. One person was enough. He didn’t need them to know you also did.
“Why do you hide it away, though?”
“Oh, come on, Marco.” His chuckle now turned bitter. “I am not risking what I already have with her.”
Jean swallowed an enormous lump before turning around, beckoning his best friend to follow suit, as he didn’t want to talk about this anymore. With Mikasa, it was fine because they started as strangers. But with you? He clicked with your mind and taste in joke, practically chose you as his ally since day one he saw you tamed Sasha.
He didn’t want to throw the dice, wondering if maybe he could have more with you. So he decided to just love Mikasa, continuing his admiration while still keeping you close.
Because he was aware, he wouldn’t feel complete without you in his life.
Jean sucked a deep breath, not believing himself or what he just saw. Everything, everything. It felt like time stopped as all the memories from his past life came into him. Not just a glimpse, not just a spark or anything he had seen before when he was with Mikasa or anyone else he met before.
It was just a playful pat from Marco on his shoulder, but he swore it made his legs wobble for a second there as if the freckled man tried to push him off the balcony. He couldn’t breathe, not knowing where the oxygen in his lungs went with these memories came to him like a hurdle of waves, trying to drown him out.
He wanted to reach out towards you and the ravenette who was already walking away. Marco had his left hand intertwined with yours, practically pulling you away from him and it just — it wasn’t fair and it hurt.
“Hey.”
Jean called out to you, feeling so relieved when you stopped walking and took another look at him. Right now, there was only you in his eyes. You, the one who knew him best, maybe the same or even more than the man who stood behind you.
There were so many things he wanted to say. So many words that were left unsaid after the whirlpool of emotion came crashing down at him. And when you pursed your lips, when he saw tears glossed your eyes despite you tried to keep it at bay, he had a feeling that you knew.
Oh, you knew that he knew.
The promises. What he had said before in the life where the two of you were reckless soldiers, everything went up to the surface after being buried by nature.
So this was the reason you always had some kind of subtle reaction when he talked about Mikasa. This was the reason you ended up moving to another place without telling him, the thing that pushed you to go away and settled your heart somewhere else.
Because you realise the promises had been broken the second he said I do, four years ago, in front of Mikasa Ackerman.
“I promise, I promise I will find you one day.”
He did. He found you here in this lifetime. A place without titan, without the two of you having to be afraid that every moment would be the last.
“We will be happy by then.”
However, it was nothing like the one he had in mine. Not the one youhad been waiting for. The two of you didn’t meet and fall in love, not married to one another and have kids or anything you were supposed to tell him. The house he bought in previous lifetime and this one — it wasn’t for you. Not for you to take a shelter in with him.
He could have that. If only in this life too,he was willing to gamble his friendship with you. Maybe you were the one who had his last name instead of the woman who now waited for him in the driver’s seat.
But the two of you were aware that maybe, no matter what kind of world he resided in, this was how it would end with you.
“Y-Yes, Jean?”
With him to live and fall in love with someone else, and you to stay in his life as nothing more but a dearest friend.
↪ content; canon universe, description of violence, season 4, reincarnation!au, heavy angst
“Will you marry me?”
You stopped putting up the blade on the scabbard when you heard the question from behind you. At this messed up moment, you never expected someone to make such a crucial proposition, not when in a few minutes from now you were ready to board the flying boat, ready to put your life on the line to save the world.
The question echoed at the back of your mind, and you were still debating whether it was a good thing to turn around and acknowledge the marriage proposal you received or just shrugged it off. You were not in a situation to think about something as petty as love, not when one of you probably couldn’t make it out alive from this cruel war.
If the two of you were strolling around Trost like what you used to, you would not hesitate to face him. You could imagine yourself with your eyes shining under the bright sunlight, asking what he meant whether he was being serious or just wanted to tease you. And you knew, you would know the answer to his question.
“Don’t joke around at a time like this, Jean.”
But the circumstance you were in right now did not help you to let out the word that you wanted to say. There was no time to be a lovesick woman, there was no time to think about a future that was out of your reach. The thing that you needed to be focused on was for you to give everything you had to fight the founding titan.
You really hoped that he would drop the question and just let you go, because you knew your heart too well, and saying no to him was something that had been a struggle for you ever since the two of you were just stupid brats in the Cadet Corps.
“You know I will never joke about something as important as this.”
No air could fill your lungs at this point, and you felt your legs wobble slightly from the earnest tone that he used. “Hey, just listen to me, okay? Turn around, face me at least if you want to say no. Rejection is something that I have been through my whole life anyway.”
That was it. That was probably the reason you didn’t want to face him. You knew. You were there. Your eyes caught everything for the past years ever since you knew him, and you swore from the bottom of your heart that you would do anything if only he could look at you like how he saw the beautiful, multi-talented ravenette that now was chatting with Armin.
He was not serious with the question, probably he was, but he would never be serious when it came to his own feelings. Him loving you? That was probably the stupidest, deceitful, delusional thing that ever crossed your mind. And you knew the reason why he threw that question at you instead of her.
Because as for now, she only had eyes on someone else, the same person that was trying to commit worldwide genocide, excluding Paradis, the same person that everyone was trying to take down with their blades and guns.
“Why do you want to marry me in the first place, Jean?” You tried as hard as you could not to let your voice waver, still not facing him as you didn’t want to show how pitiful you looked right now. “You would never want to marry me. We fight now and then, we bicker all the time—”
“Because you are the one who knows me best, that’s why.” He cut you off, perhaps still blinded by his own selfishness at this point. You should have known that he would never drop this off so easily, and you could only grit your teeth, not wanting to lash out. “You know me so well, no one else could understand me as much as you do. So please, I-I will love you—”
“Can you even promise that you are going to love me?” You swallowed a huge lump, waiting for his response to such a simple question. Something that never came for the next few seconds. “See, Jean?” Then you turned around, locking your gaze with his as you saw how his pupils widened, probably because he finally saw the tears that streamed down your face. “You couldn’t even promise that you are going to love me back.”
You felt so dumb right now, hands shaking from the feelings that you always buried deep inside your heart. All these years, you always knew your place, you knew you could never be as perfect as the woman that he loved. Yet he just needed to bring it up, to ask something that you wanted nothing but to answer with an excited yes.
If only you didn’t know, if only you could blind yourself from the truth — you would have run to him right now, wrapping your arms around his neck and smashing your lips against his. Something that consistently appeared in your mind with how much you wanted to know how he tasted.
But that was the thing you could never do. You watched on the sideline for the seven years you had known him, knowing how in love he was. Everything was imprinted in your mind, so you knew you could never act like you didn’t notice that he would be ready to give his own life just to save her.
He was standing still from his place, lips parted even though there were no words that rolled down his tongue. You couldn’t blame him, even though he could be such a selfish jerk sometimes, he was someone that would never want to hurt his comrades. Especially not to someone like you who was always there for him through thick and thin.
There were a few pairs of eyes that turned to look at you two, possibly debating if they should intervene or just let everything happen as it was. You knew they were probably only getting worried that there would be a huge fight that could lead to nothing but regret in later days, even so, you didn’t like the non-existent privacy that you had then.
Inhaling the air through your nose, making the salty scent of the ocean tickle your nostrils, you decided to be the one who just let it go. It didn’t matter anyway, no matter how many things you wanted to tell him, there was no alternative future where Jean Kirstein was in love with you.
Therefore, with a heavy heart, you walked past him, leaving him to contemplate alone about his own feelings. He didn’t call out to you, not trying to stop you from walking away, so you knew that he probably understood by now that asking you to marry him was the biggest mistake he ever made in his life.
Although you wished, you really wished in your wildest dream that perhaps someday, you could hear him ask the exact same question to you.
Using an intonation filled with certainty, with his whole heart loving every part of your being.
Your fingertips trailing the white silk napery that was draped neatly on top of a round, wooden table. A smile etched on your face since you knew today would be perfect. Everything was in place, and you couldn’t feel better knowing that the weather was excellent at the moment.
White dress wrapped around your figure, and you felt so beautiful and confident wearing it. Leaving the table where the tall wedding cake was placed before, you sauntered through the venue to greet each guest that you met along the way, with the same smile that never wavered as they congratulated you for today.
You didn’t realise how a pair of molten copper eyes looking at you with pride glinting inside his orbs, praising you internally as he felt so blessed that you were here. From the very first start he met you, he knew there was something about your existence that made him want nothing but to keep you in his life.
He recalled how he bumped into you a few years back in a bookstore, and even though you were ready to slip away from him after muttering a small apology, he couldn’t help himself but grip your wrist, telling you to wait.
And despite the embarrassment that took him from gripping a stranger’s wrist, he thanked himself for not letting you go that easily.
Because now, you had become such an important person in his life, someone that he would always cherish no matter what.
“Is everything ready?”
You flinched when you felt someone’s breath on your ear, making you yelp since you were just done greeting another guest that asked you where to sit.
“Jean!” Turning your head to face him, you whispered-shout at his face before punching his chest lightly, an action that elicited a low chuckle coming from his lips. “What are you doing here? Goodness! The groom shouldn’t wander around the venue like this, you know?”
Your pout always looked so adorable, and that was one of the reasons why he always loved to tease you. He didn’t know why, but he couldn’t have a single day pass without trying to mess with your head. And despite how annoying he could be, you always stayed and gave him your attention.
“You are not supposed to be here either.” He gently flicked your chin, and he let out another chuckle when you hissed from his action.
“Fuck it, Jean. At this point, I ask myself what the meaning of my existence in your life actually is.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes in a mocking tone as you folded your arms in front of your chest. “You always tease me! Why do you even want me here in the first place? I would end up to be—”
“Because you are the one who knows me best, that’s why.”
He swore he could see your pupils dilated slightly from his words, and it made him stop laughing at you, since he saw that emotion inside your eyes all over again. You were always like this sometimes, to suddenly stop talking, stop responding to anything for a few seconds as if your whole life was fleeting through your mind.
But then it was back to normal, and the emotionless facade that you had before now slowly filled with another expression.
“Is that supposed to be a compliment, Jean Kirstein?”
Though somehow, he could sense something from the way you called his name just now. Something that he didn’t know what it was, but it made him scared and oddly nostalgic at the same time.
“Well, it's—”
“Jean! It’s the time!”
A gentle, familiar voice called out to him. And the atmosphere that was built nicely around the two of you suddenly vanished into the thin air. Both of you turned to the source of the voice, finding the beautiful ravenette woman waving in your direction. “Connie is waiting for you in the dressing room!”
“I’ll be there soon, love!”
He waved back, though he didn’t move his feet even until the woman walked away from the scene. Today was his wedding day, and he was supposed to be so thrilled and felt all of the excitement in his heart. In a few minutes from now, the love of his life, his first love and dream girl would be his wife, but at the moment, he didn’t want to leave you alone just yet.
“So, where are—”
“Nevermind, Jean. She called.” You took a few steps backwards, giving him and you a proper gap. But his face never left you as somehow he felt something that rooted him to his place. “Jean, your bride called.” Snapping two fingers in front of his face, he finally could regain himself, and a small nervous chuckle slipped from his lips when he realised that he was daydreaming before.
“Yeah, yeah. My bride, yes.” He cleared his throat, averting your gaze completely since somehow he could not take a look at you. When you saw this, you raised one of your eyebrows, wondering why he stayed here when his bride already called him to prepare himself and wear the wedding suit.
“Don’t tell me you had wedding jitters, Jean.”
“H-Huh? Why would I? Mikasa is perfect, and—”
“And you were always meant to be with her, I know.” You chuckled a little, though it didn’t sound as sincere as usual, but he shrugged it off. “You always told me about it, that you have met her before, perhaps in your previous life, right?” He nodded at that, letting out a long sigh as he swept his hair to the back. “So what’s on your mind? Why are you still standing here with me? You are so close to marrying her again, Jean.”
“I promise, I promise I will find you one day.”
A flicker of memory appeared out of nowhere, something that usually happened only when his fiancée was around. But these days as you helped him plan his wedding day and became his wedding organiser, another part of an unknown memory appeared in his mind, little by little without any concrete context.
And it stressed him out more than anything, because he was afraid that he took a wrong path, or not knowing something that he should have remembered.
“I-I just feel like I have a promise to someone else, I guess.” He swallowed a huge lump, averting his gaze to the side, making him miss the way your eyes watered slightly. “And that someone else, that someone else is you! But I can’t remember what it was, I don’t know—”
“Jean.” You stopped him, resting your palm on his chest as you didn’t want to hear anything else from him. His copper eyes went back towards your face with pupils dilated slightly, wanting to calm himself down. “You don’t have to think about it.” But he didn’t need to try, not with you gazing at him with such tenderness and care that gave him contentment already.
Panting a little, he bit his upper lip since he was still stressed. He really wanted to know what it was, the promise that he made with you and why he said such a thing. There were no other sentences, he could only hear himself saying that to you in his past life, but he didn’t know the reason behind it, making him so anxious.
Though now, you were standing tall before him with a look that he couldn’t quite fathom despite how comforting it was to him. “You know I never remember anything from my past, Jean. Perhaps you promised something because we are friends, whatever it was though, it doesn’t matter.” He didn’t know anymore if you were trying to reassure him or yourself, but he listened to your words and took it all in. “It was nothing, okay? What matters is here, now. In this life where you love her again.”
His fingers gently wrapped around your wrist, subconsciously caressing it as he processed your words. He was a little bit of a hypocrite when he realised that. No matter how many times he didn’t want to get so hung up over the same woman that he loved in his past life, he ended up to be a hopeless romantic, thinking how beautiful it was to recreate something that happened once.
“Yeah, you are right.” He chuckled to let out the awkwardness that he felt before ruffling your hair a little. “You are always right. I am glad you are here in my life.”
Your smile only widened at that, and you couldn’t help but lean in and pressed a platonic kiss on his cheek. You didn’t realise how his body went frozen in place for a moment there, but as you pulled away, he already fixed himself and just gave you a cheeky smile, as if to tease him.
“Now go, go dress yourself to the nines.” You patted his chest one more time before pushing him forward. “Go! You are going to be the happiest man alive!” And he ambled away. Even though a bit unsteady, he kept on going, now with a more stable emotion.
For sure, there was nothing else that he should be worried about. You were here, you would always be here for him, the best friend that never left his side, just like Connie, Marco and Sasha. And he knew you were always right. Anything that happened in his past life didn’t matter.
What mattered was what happened here, now, and that was for him to be the husband of someone he had been in love with for the past few years.
You could only watch his back as he ran to a secured future that he always dreamed of. Standing there alone, you waited until he was gone from your sight, wanting to be there in case he would look back and needing some assurance.
But the second he was gone inside the building, you immediately darted towards the nearest bathroom.
There were a lot of things that happened in your mind right now; you wanted to throw up from the nausea that you felt, you wanted to cry from the lie you had committed to ever since you met him, you wanted to just move to another state and forget that you had a life here.
Although you knew it was not possible, not when your days had been filled with his existence, and even though you would always be the best friend in whatever life you had — you knew you could never erase himself completely.
Locking the bathroom’s door, you immediately collapsed on the seat that was placed in the middle of the room, wanting to calm down as you finally felt your heart break into a million little pieces. After years swallowing down the truth, after years you hid what you knew, the dam broke freely with no one there to fix it.
“Shit! Don’t leave me, please don’t leave me too.” You couldn’t feel anything as your body felt so numb, eyes looking up to the skies that were so clear you couldn’t see any clouds on it. “Hey, hey, look at me.” But then someone tilted your head so you could face him, and you were met with the familiar copper orbs that you always loved to stare at.
It was Jean, your best friend ever since the two of you were in the Cadet Corps. You despised his cocky attitude at first, not liking how he was so hostile toward others. Yet as time went by and you started to get to know him better, he was actually a lot more human than any other person you ever met.
You could feel his finger tucking the strands of hair behind your ear, as if wanting to see you more clearly. At first you were so lost, you didn’t know what happened right now and you wanted nothing but to ask him. But as you felt the excruciating pain at your abdomen, everything replayed at the back of your head.
One of the titan ancestors bit you, hard, and you were pretty sure you would have fallen by now, perhaps crushed underneath the colossal titans who’s currently splat everything in their way. Instead, you were here now in the arms of the man that you loved so much, and you parted your lips, wanting to tell him the words that you wanted to say.
You wanted to do it all. You wanted to scream at him that you have always been in love with him, you wanted to pull his collars and smash your lips with his, you wanted to stay alive and see the world with him and the others.
“Y-Yes.”
But from all the things that you wanted to do, you could only utter that one word, and you hoped he understood the meaning behind it. However, from how his irises widened after that, you were certain that he knew. Tears welled up in his eyes, and for once he didn’t care if he could be killed during this time for wanting to stay by your side at the last minute of your life.
“Listen to me, don’t say anything, just listen to me.” He swallowed a huge lump and held your hand, squeezing it tight since he wanted you to feel that you were not alone. “I am going to find you, in another life, I will. We are going to meet up, fall in love, get married to each other, have kids if you want that, anything you want! Anything, anything you want me to.”
Jean said it all in one take of breath, afraid that you were already gone by now. “I promise, I promise I will find you one day.” And his lips shaped into a thin smile as he saw your peaceful face. “We will be happy by then.” Whispering one last time before hurriedly pressing his lips on yours, giving you the warmth that you always wanted to taste.
You clapped your hands as you stood up from your seat, wearing the best smile that you could offer as you watched him leaning down to kiss her, to kiss the same woman that was fated to be loved by someone as wonderful as him.
Truthfully, you felt like a masochist for wanting to be here. There were a lot of good wedding organisers out there, but he decided to call you, using the same sentence that he chose you because he knew you would never disappoint — that you were the one who knew him best.
He looked so majestic with the white wedding suit wrapped perfectly to compliment his tall figure. You didn’t count how many times you wanted to break down seeing him in white like this, not when you already promised to yourself that you were going to do anything to make him the happiest man alive.
The smile that now radiated from his face, the tears that pricked at the corner of his eyes as he looked at the guest, it was enough sign that you did the right thing.
Even in this life, you knew that he was meant to be with her. When you received tons of miss calls from him a few months after the two of you had become close friends and told you everything about this perfect woman, you already surrendered your own happiness for his.
He sounded so excited that day, gushing at you about this one ravenette he met at the cafe. Someone with the most beautiful hair that he always saw, someone that you knew her name was even without him telling you first.
You listened to him, every single day, about how he wanted to be with her. He told you when he accidentally touched her hand; he felt a spark that felt so nostalgic, and he saw how he was kissing her in perhaps his past life. And when you received such information, when you connected the dots about the things that happened after you die, you immediately set that one goal in your life.
That, whatever happened, he had to get her. She always ended up being the one he loved the most, and there was nothing you could do to change that. Jean never gave any sign that he recognised you either, so you knew there was no point for you to ask him about the promise that he made.
In this life where there were no cruel monsters, you thought perhaps you would find love in the form of him. But it was not possible, not when she was his true love, and you had to accept the fact that you would always just become the woman who knew him best — nothing else but that.
And even though you had to endure the same pain that you felt in your previous life, watching the man that you gave your whole heart to be head over heels with someone else, you regretted nothing.
Because you were sure that you and your heart would make it through, just like you always did from the start.
your hands wrap around the edges of the sink, your gripping it so hard that you feel it could break in your hands. his arms wrap around your waist along with you bunched up skirt. your eyes are screwed shut as his cock abuses your cervix over and over. his groans fill the air of the slightly dirty club bathroom.
im doing random characters so send who you want me to do next!
this is a crack fic as per usual
woz’s thought of the day: free miko from my serenitea pot
warnings: cursing, dumbasses being dumbasses, improper grammar bc i never paid attention to it in school and now i cant read or write oops lol
✰
itto
- somehow always shows up when someone is messing with you
- like even if a little kid bumps into you he’ll pop up behind you out of NOWHERE like “do it again bitch see what happens”
- we know hes not above fighting a child
- begs you to join his gang every single day promising he’ll share the snacks he won from an 8 year old with you (but you know he never will)
✰
jean
- “dont come in my office” but always leaves a chair next to her desk bc she knows youll come in anyways
- you drag her out of her office and she flails around like a child bc she needs to finish the work that she has to turn in in 3 years
- you guys sit under the big windrise tree (names are hard and i dont feel like looking it up) and take naps
- jean is so petty if shes upset w you she’ll put you on the cleanup crew ™️ (ft noelle) and make you chase after klee
✰
ayato
- he’s so bratty its hilarious
- you go out for dinner and when the check comes he just gets up and leaves??? “someone else usually covers it” BITCH YOU CANT JUST LEAVE????
- gives the worst advice ever but we love him for that
- you’re stressed abt work? just get someone else to do it
- ask him to do your work for you and he’ll look at you like you’re a psychopath
✰
xiao
- ZERO social skills idk how you guys became friends
- like you’ll be relaxing by yourself and he’ll show up out of nowhere
“…”
“hello”
“THE FUCK-”
- the kind of friend whos brutally honest with you without any hesitation
“that outfit is terrible”
“xiao this is an outfit YOU picked for me bc you hated all the others”
“did i stutter”
✰
kujo sara
- shogun stans ™️
- lowkey kind of a tsundere friend? she’ll never admit that she really enjoys your company.
- yall became friends bc you talked once and she decided she liked you so she would follow you around (but at a distance bc she doesnt know how to start a casual conversation)
- you eventually went up to her and asked if she was ok and the rest is history
- naur bc if yall are REALLY CLOSE she’ll rant to you and she has a lotto say
“how the fuck did the shogun change her mind so quickly abt the vision hunt decree i poured my blood sweat and tears into enforcing that shit-”
“sara it is 3AM can this wait 4 more hours-”
“idare you to interrupt me again”
i think i have carpal tunnel from playing hatsune miku colorful stage
You were moving into a new apartment and carrying boxes from the first floor to the third floor by yourself. The apartment did have an elevator, but it was taking so much longer to wait for the elevator than to just walk the boxes up yourself. One of the trips, you couldn’t carry the whole way and needed the elevator. Of course. Just as you were making your way there, the doors started closing and you dramatically yelled, “Wait!” To your surprise, the doors opened back up and you stepped on with your big box. The man inside held the doors open while you brought it to your apartment. When you made it back down for another box, he was waiting by the doors and asked if you needed help. It was weird, but cute.
Where you go on a date
Jean takes you on an outdoor lunch in the park. He plans everything and even gets the food and everything you’ll need. He wanted to make everything really romantic, but also didn’t really know how to do it since you both just met. He brought sandwiches, stuff for a charcuterie board, a random baguette and two different kinds of wine.
Something that goes wrong
The basket handles broke when you were walking to find a place to sit because it was so heavy from all the things Jean brought. When you saw what he brought though, you were amazed and took tons of photos, making you the envy of all your friends.
How they confess
I think jean is the most straight forward with this. He would know he just wants to tell you and would spend most of his time building the confidence to so it until finally when you’re laughing about something and taking a bite of cheese, he will just smile and tell you he likes you.
What gift they bring you
Jean is also a bit of a traditional gift giver. It’s not because he’s bad at giving gifts, I actually think it’s the opposite. I think he is a really good gift giver, but I think he sticks with traditional chocolates because he wants to give you that ‘Valentine’s Day’ feeling and doesn’t want you to feel like you’re missing out or misinterpreting how he feels about you.
mod.chr; if you don’t know what the five love languages are, here’s a link. the five love languages consist of quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, and gift-giving. on another note, i love them so much <3333 ( my inbox is open again, if anyone’s interested in requesting )
gift-giving ( her -> you ); i feel as though this one is pretty self-explanatory. as the eldest daughter of the kamisato clan, ayaka has more wealth than the average inazuman citizen, so whenever she spots something that she thinks you would like, she would most likely buy it for you, no matter the price.
( unless the item is very pricey for no apparent reason. )
“(name)?”
you perked up, turning your head to see your lover walking behind you. “ayaka! how was your trip to the city?”
smiling, ayaka kneels beside you, her pale hair rippling due to the slight wind. “it was quite pleasant, i very much enjoyed it. the citizens were nice, and i was able to meet yoimiya.”
you grinned, closing your eyes as you did so. “that’s great to hear. i’m happy you were able to spend some time away from work and take a break.”
ayaka flinched as she remembered how much time she had spent with yoimiya discussing upcoming festivals.
noticing the skeptical expression on her face, ayaka quickly picked up the box to her right and placed it on your lap. “here, i bought you a gift i bought while i was on my trip.”
your suspicion quickly subsided as you picked up the box from your lap. “oh? what is it?”
“well, why don’t you open it and see?”
words of affirmation ( you -> her );ayaka loves it when you tell her how much you love her. she has her insecurities and struggles at times, and even if it’s just an “i love you”, from her, it makes her day even better.
“thoma, where is (name)?”
“(name)? they said they had urgent matters to attend to in the city and should be back by tomorrow. why?”
disappointed, ayaka shook her head. “it’s nothing. i’ll be in my room, then.” thoma nodded before continuing his sweeping, only to then stop once again.
“ah, milady, hold on!”
at his call, ayaka stops walking and turns around with a confused expression. “is something the matter, thoma?”
the housekeeper jogs over to her before holding out an envelope, which she takes. “(name) told me to give this to you before they left.”
her curiosity piqued, ayaka takes the envelope. “thank you, thoma.”
once she was inside her room, ayaka opened the envelope and took out the card that was inside.
“hello, darling!
thoma said that you were struggling a bit today, so i hope you’re doing better now.
did i ever tell you how much i love you? now that i think about it, probably not. i’ll tell you when i get home, so be prepared for that, okay?
love, (name).”
her cheeks red, ayaka leaned against the door with her head tilted back and her eyes closed, her hands holding the letter to her chest.
“how comforting…”
notes; *looks at the other woman i have to do* sometimes, being gay is a disadvantage.
quality time ( her -> you ); as the acting grand master, jean rarely had time for herself, much less time for you. that said, she tries her best to free up her schedule so that the two of you could spend more time with each other.
both you and jean stood side to side, elbows barely touching as you did your jobs. your lover was cutting up some vegetables and cheese while you kneaded the dough.
“y’know, i didn’t think you would be home tonight. you haven’t been inside the house for a while now.”
smiling guiltily, jean picked up a mushroom before slicing it in half. “i truly am sorry about that, my love, i really am, but i’m here now, aren’t i?”
you sigh, sprinkling more flour onto the dough. “…better late than never, i suppose.”
“mmh…”
silence fell onto the two of you once again, and it stayed that way until the you put the pizza into the oven.
“did i ever tell you how i got my vision?” you asked, standing up after tending to the fire with your pyro abilities.
the question seemed to surprise jean, but she quickly recomposed herself. “uhm, no, i don’t believe you have.”
“then, if you’re going to stay here for the night, i’d be more than happy to tell you about it over dinner.”
jean smiled at you happily, her blue orbs eyes glinting under the candlelight. “andi would be more happy to listen to you, my dandelion.”
< a/n; ngl whenever people use eyes instead of orbs it sorta weird me out :’) no offense to the people who use that though, i think it’s just a very unique synonym for “eyes”. >
words of affirmation ( you -> her ); during her childhood, jean has never been told “i love you” all that much. it isn’t much of a surprise, though, seeing as her mother seemed the type to lecture her children rather than give them affection. this is why she gets quite flustered when you tell her you love her and appreciates it more than a normal person would.
“lisa…-huff-…please help me.”
the librarian turned around to see the blonde knight panting behind her, cheeks flushed and eyes wide. “jean? what happened to you?”
she watched as her friend trudged over to a chair beside her desk before collapsing into it. “i think i’m sick.”
“you think you’re sick?” the librarian frowns, setting down the book she had been holding. “is there a reason why?”
“it’s just… whenever (name) tells me this… thing, my heart pounds like crazy.” jean says, fidgeting.
“and what is this thing?”
“that… they, um, love me.”
“that they love you.” lisa repeats incredulously. “jean, you think you’re sick because your heart pounds whenever your lover tells you they love you?”
jean’s cheeks promptly turn red once again as she presses her face into her hands. “it sounds a lot more ridiculous when you say it like that.”
“well, of course, it does.” lisa said, crossing her arms. “it already sounded ridiculous when you first said it.”
groaning, the blonde takes her face out of her hands. “lisa, what am i supposed to do now? when they said that, it was like my mind just melted immediately after!”
“well, it’s not as if you just walked away without giving (name) a response, right? there’s nothing for you to worry about.”
noticing the anxious expression on jean’s face, lisa’s eyes widened in disbelief. “jean, you didn’t just… walk away from them without saying anything, did you?”
cw/tw: porn with a very small plot, reader is a virgin and has never touched herself, reader is smaller than average compared to jean but sizes aren’t mentioned except for ‘little’ and ‘tiny’, mentions of blood pressure and periods, lube, fingering, soft dom jean, corruption kink!!, begging, a lot of kissing, sweet dirty talk
“want you so bad, dr. kirstein.”
– THIS CONTENT IS 18+ ; PLEASE RESPECT MY BOUNDARIES AND DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU ARE A MINOR/-18 !!
