#living with adhd
I’m sorry I’ve been gone. Here’s me trying to find my way back. In November I got an ADHD diagnosis that was 30 years overdue. I’ve been unpacking thoughts on ADHD, rejection sensitivity and friendship fails.
In today’s episode of “Nobody asked you to be my armchair psychiatrist…”
(Yet again) receiving unsolicited “advice” from a recreational cocaine userwithoutanymedical professional qualifications comparing getting assessed for ADHD to recklessly doping one’s self to the point of total cognitive dysfunction just for funsies.
Did I askfor your medical input? No? Then don’t offer it.
I’m really bad about getting off topic when discussing something or after being asked a question. It’s not as though I change the topic completely at a whim, but rather whatever is being talked about relates to something else and my ADHD sends me down a rabbit hole. I’m really bad about getting off topic when discussing something or after being asked a question. It’s not as though I change the topic completely at a whim, but rather whatever is being talked about relates to something else and my ADHD sends me down a rabbit hole
This is a very personal comic, even though it’s not very long and doesn’t have many details. There were many opportunities in my life where my ADHD should have been caught, but I felt like I had been failed several times by the same professionals I had sought help from. It all boiled down to the fact they thought they knew me better than I knew me and therefore what I had to say was not deemed important enough to listen to.
It wasn’t until I started seeing my current therapist that I was actually allowed to speak for myself. At first it seemed to only confirm my Generalized Anxiety Disorder, but the more I talked, the more she began to realize that there was something else going on. One day she politely asked me to stop for a moment and point blank asked me “Bri, have you ever heard of Inattentive ADHD?” I had not.
And it was then I began my true journey.
ADHD has many positives! But it also has downsides. It’s not a superpower but it’s not all negative either.
ADHD just is, it’s a neurotype which is not inherently negative nor positive, and even though it gives us a lot of strengths like the ability to hyperfocus, it’s important to remember that it’s also a disability because society isn’t made for us, and so we struggle and need accommodations.
Humans are more complex than just positives and negatives, abilities and disabilities, there’s whole galaxies inside of each of us :)
I have sensory issues and, for some reason, people think it’s just me finding bright lights, loud sounds, unwanted touches and weird food textures are annoying, just like everyone feels about them, and I’m just being dramatic. Except that I’m not, I truly struggle with it, and it’s hard to explain how you feel things when others don’t feel the same.
Ever felt overstimulated AND understimulated? Yeahhhhhhhh
Break ups can be hard, and to me ADHD makes them harder
Break ups can be hard, and to me ADHD makes them harder
You know what. Instead of focusing on all the bad things from 2020. I want to focus on the good
So, reblog and add something good that happened last year. Whether it’s global it personal.
For me it was finally getting my new kitchen
And this blog.
I had maybe the second worst mental health year of my life but it led to me taking a lot of steps towards improving my mental health like starting a new medication and getting back to consistently seeing a psychologist.
I’m really proud of that. It was hard but it was really positive for me and my wellbeing.
This year I want to continue taking steps to look after myself and put myself in the best position I can to live a good and well-rounded life that I love.
How about you all?
I forgot to put on sun cream
And now I look like a tomato
That’s it
That’s the post
ADHD bitches be like: I accidentally created a whole fantasy world while brushing my teeth
The Autism loves making schedules, drawing up planners, writing out every detail of everything that is and will happen
The ADHD forgets we even made the plan two days later even though we spent over four hours on it
Today was fine until I had two meltdowns and a seizure all because I can’t find a top that I really like and want to take to Scotland with me
On Friday I got myself in gear and applied to three art shows; one local and the other two in Annapolis. It’s more of a process than you’d expect, because each entity has specific requirements, different forms, and each digital image has to have a specific format just for its name. Easy to goof up, just saying. The local show is just for members and isn’t juried, so that’s the least worrisome. The other two are juried, and I’m hoping very much to get in. The one thing I didn’t do? Is keep records from the MFA show called Mountains and Marinas. The entry form was online. I did not screenshot what I sent them. And now I have no idea which artwork I entered or what price I assigned them.
Argh!
I’m not usually entering multiple shows all at once, and it threw me off. I guess if I get into the show, they’ll send me a notice saying “Your painting XYZ has been chosen.” But I feel like a bit of a nitwit.
hey! i’m kicking off the #ADHDInvasion hashtag for adhd awareness month with a comic about CONSEQUENCES, and how my lifelong failure to react to them has been a huge source of frustration for me and for the ppl in my life who rely on me. even worse, it makes me seem apathetic or careless to others, when in reality it weighs really heavily on me - i just struggle to show it.
the best way i’ve found to deal with this is accepting that shame-based motivation DOES NOT WORK AT ALL for me (which is hard to do, when it’s all that’s been modeled for you by parents/educators/bosses) and try to replace fear/shame based consequences with positive outcomes: i.e. instead of “everyone will be so disappointed in me if i don’t do this,” sometimes it’s more helpful to think “if i do this on time, i’ll feel so relieved, and everyone will be happy that i pulled through.”
check out the roster here and make sure you don’t miss the comics from all the other artists participating!
Mmmmyep.
oh, holy shit, this. T H I S.
Le sigh. Always hanging over me too
Post link
Personal ramble post:
Thinking a lot about mental health in relation to my career and work-life balance lately.
Dealing with ongoing mental health issues like ADHD and depression can be a very uneven experience.
Sometimes you’re doing great, taking your meds, having what I like to call “good brain days”. And these might last a while! Long enough that you start to feel like you have a handle on things, even like you might be in something resembling remission.
Then you go downhill. Often you’re still taking your meds, still practicing the healthier coping mechanisms you’ve learned, all of it. Despite that, you’re really struggling again. You remember that no, this isn’t something you can be cured of. There is no silver bullet, and this struggle will continue to be a large portion of your life.
I’ve mostly accepted that, but it can be hard when a long good period is what’s been allowing you to get up and go to work like every one else. When that period comes to an end, what do I do? Am I ever going to be able to maintain a 40 hour week for more than a few months before I burn out?
The pandemic has really opened my eyes to this, because I’ve been working costuming jobs mostly from home, which requires me to keep close track of my hours. I’m realizing that left to my own devices, I struggle to put in more than 30 hours a week. Sometimes I can’t even make 20. And the ADHD can make it very hard to work as efficiently as another seamstress would.
I think actually working around other people again might help with that, but my career goal is costume designer, to which independance & time management is crucial. And in the meantime, the average wardrobe stitching job is often a lot more than 40h/week. How can I ever hope to make a good life for myself when I can only handle part-time hours?
I guess I just hope that it will become easier if I find a job I actually like that pays a living wage? But there’s no guarantee for any of it.
Me: *is in a hurry for an important work appointment*
Also me: *searches car keys at the exact place where I put it five seconds ago*
The place:
