#incorrect mbti quotes
ENTJ: Legally, I won’t persecute you for your dumbass beliefs in aliens
INTJs and socializing
I think INTJ ended up asking 0 people.
Exorcist : I am here to remove the demon that has possessed you.
xNTx : I didn’t call you.
Demon : I did. She keeps making me cry.
Enfp : do you know what time it is?
Entp :yes.
Enfp:
Entp :
Enfp : you’re not telling me are you?
Entp :no.
ENFP: I think I’m going to do a live scream tonight.
INTJ: Isn’t it called a live stream?
ENFP: *inhales*
Day 30 of quarantine
ENFP: *frantically baking cookies while there are 20+ trays of cookies around the kitchen*
ENTP: *pacing and solving their 121st rubix cube, occasionally bumping into walls*
INFP: *singing “I Won’t Say I’m In Love” passionately to a lamp while crying and acting out every single scene while doing so*
ENTJ: *Rocking back and forth drinking their 35th cup of coffee*
INTP: *Smacking themselves with their PS4 controller*
INTJ: *Frantically petting their pet snake on the sofa* We’re fine
INFJ, raising their voice slightly so they can speak to ENFP down at the other end of the grocery store aisle: Do you want any chips?
ENFP, screaming: I’M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR DORITOS.
Person: Why do you go to sleep so late?
INTJ, looking off into the distance: There’s no rest for the wicked.
Person:
INTJ:
INFJ: Cat videos. He stays up late to watch cat videos.
ENFP : Good morning! I brought your coffee.
ISTJ : Thank you, can I have a little spoon please?
ENFP : Oh, I almost forgot! [Hugs ISTJ from behind]
ISTJ : [flustered] That’s not what I meant, but I’ll take this too-
ENTP: Ugh, ISTJ, you’re such a goodie two-shoes
ISTJ: No, I’m not!
ENTP: Oh, yes, you are! You’re like an unsalted pretzel
ISTJ: What do you mean?
ENTP: You’re like if school and news had a baby
ENFP: Get some spice into you, ISTJ!
ISTJ: I can be spicy! look, my shoe’s untied, and I’m not even gonna retie it! Actually, I am. I could trip
ENFP : I just saw a guy in the library cry for five minutes or so and then his phone alarm went off and he just…stopped crying ? And went right on back to work.
INFJ : Yeah that was just ESFJ
ESFJ : [walking past them] it’s called time management.
ENFP: Are you having a depressive episode again?
INFP: Depressive episode?
INFP: I’m having a depressive series and we’re on season 5.
ENTP: “Ladies and gentlemen” is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly I’m falling asleep already.
ENTP: “Cowards,” on the other hand, is inclusive to all genders, casual and fun, short and to the point, exciting, and dramatic.
INTJ : I don’t care about that prize.
INTJ : But I’m gonna win because I want his happiness to go away.
xNTP : And I knew exactly what to do.
xNTP : …but in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.
xNFP : Would I rather be feared or loved ? Easy, both.
xNFP : I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.
INTJ : We have to maintain a cool, calm and collected mindset, and strategically plant out our attack -
ENTP :
intj: enfp, we need to talk about your professionalism
enfp, standing on a chair: those are some mighty brave words for a guy standing in lava
infp: i made this friendship bracelet for you.
intj: you know, i’m not really a jewelry person.
infp: you don’t have to wear it.
intj: no i’m gonna wear it forever. back off.
infj: i put a tracker in intj’s food so i can know where they are at all times
enfp: yes, so did i
istj: me too
infj: do you think all that radiation is bad for them?
enfp: i’m sure they’ll be fine
istj: they’ve lived a long life already
istj: no, entp! we are behaving so we can be invited again next year
entp: istj, with all due respect, i am going to ignore everything you just said
