#melanchonic
There is a piece of me in every art piece ive made. A time capsule of who i was, what i felt in that moment. Meaningless expression to inspire meaningful connections
I am the shadow of a forest lake, whose waters wash the grey shores of sorrow. My half-sisters are drowned, their souls dissolving in the muddy water, wandering behind me on gray cloudy evenings, trying to grab the hem of my dress. I am a shadow without voice, without name, without age and memory of the past. Sometimes in the monochrome ripples of the water I could read the words, in its hieroglyphs of shadows and reflections, the words spoken before the Exodus, before the inevitable death, the words of the doomed. At such moments, like a cold stone snake penetrated into my heart, and pain fettered all my inside. I tried to erase the words with the darkness that enveloped me, but in vain. My tears could not erase the pain that soaked the waters of this lake. I was just a shadow, one that couldn’t change the flow of time and the flow of water. I could only watch. Then, overcoming a shiver, I lay down on the water and looked into the gray sky, hidden by a veil of clouds that were so inaccessible, and it seemed to me in them, as in this lake, there is the same shadow that could only feel the coldness of this lake of tears.
Natalie Ina
The Shadow of Forest Lake.
Self-portrait.
Collaboration with From Beyond Dolls.
Natalie Ina Photography.
June 2019.
For all questions, as well as for the purchase of photo prints and about the collaboration, please write to my mail: [email protected]
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Navidad?
Disculpen algunos, vemos diferente y vivimos diferente, pero realmente que es la navidad, desde pequeño crecí sin saber acerca de ella, rara vez la festejamos, como un simple intercambio y ya, sin en cambio, me alegra ver a los demás pasándola genial o divertirse con sus personas queridas, no pido comprensión, pero crecí en un ambiente lleno de amor, pero a medida que iba creciendo vi lo peor de las personas, estar rodeado de hipocresías, al igual que para algunos, es triste saber que ya no estarán más personas que dejaron de estar, por qué llenarse de tristeza y no de felicidad?, aún tenemos cosas pero ni de adultos apreciamos, solo desprovechamos, buscamos la misma emoción, cuando jamás se repetirá, debemos agradecer por lo que aún hay antes de notar que no está, apreciamos lo ido, que olvidamos lo que tenemos, sin embargo, porque ser así solo durante estas fechas?, se que no todos insisto, pero después se olvidan, se dejan de hablar o continúan discusiones, pero esa noche que tiene de especial?, lo único que la hace así es, que nosotros la hacemos ser asi, pero podemos hacerla vivir más, no solo en navidad o noche buena, sino diario, reunirse de vez en cuando, sin excusa o pretexto, ya que al final, pero esos mismas acciones no nos libramos del día que partamos de acá, pero me entristece ver que haya personas que la pasen con personas que no se sientes a gusto com si familia, que les falta un hogar, que hay problemas en el y solo quieren llorar, lo lamento por esas personas, pero simplemente quiero dar a entender que no solo esta fecha seamos así de felices, que lo seamos diario y lo especial va a ser el momento y que lo seamos con todos
talk is gold
hard gold plated
silver bullet
coral cheeks
fall into your trap
allay all your fears
i put a bug in your ear
i could use a little help
around here
I’m coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head
But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go
And I just can’t look - it’s killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Turning through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside
I’m coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head
But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go
‘Cause I just can’t look - it’s killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Turning through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside
I can’t deny what I’ve become
I’m just emotionally undone
I can’t deny, I can’t be someone else
When I have tried to find the words
To describe this sense absurd
Try to resist my thoughts but I can’t lie
I’m losing myself
My desire I can’t hide
No reason am I for
I can’t divide or hide from me
I don’t know who I’m meant to be
I guess it’s just the person that I am
Often I’ve dreamt that I don’t wade
Enjoy the gift of my mistake
But yet again I’m wrong, and I confess
I’m losing myself
My desire I can’t hide
No reason am I for
I’m losing myself
My desire I can’t hide
No reason am I for
Holding me down
I can’t believe I am drowning somehow
Fall to my knees I need peace from the sounds
Sounds are deceiving my love of your pain
Look to the crowd
Searching for something to turn us around
Love never hides when it wants to be found
All we can know is this has to be now
Say you’ve never seen
Something so beautiful I am your dream
Tell me I’m everything you’ll ever need
I’m for you
Time is the key
Give me your heart and you’ll see what I see
Turning in circles to find what you seek
This is the feeling I want to release
Take all my pain
I’m just a soul to be lost in your haze
Take me wherever your spirit will fade
I’ll be with you till the end of our days
Holding me down
I can’t believe I am drowning somehow
Fall to my knees I need peace from the sounds
Sounds are deceiving my love of your pain
Look to the crowd
Searching for something to turn us around
Love never hides when it wants to be found
All we can know is this has to be now
This is the time to be taking a vow
This is the line I will cross it somehow
I’m taking the feeling I caught from your pain
And turning it all into something to gain
Hurt doesn’t show when it’s trying to reign
Feelings are all that we have to be sane
Running, I’m running the fight to get free
Taking the only thing that’s left of me
Confusion
Delusion
Seclusion
Inclusion
Numbing
Loving
Finding you in me
How I adore, the chaos of you
Cry out
Take out
Heartless
Fearless
Compassionately
Feeling you in me
How I love
The chaos of you
Psycho
Halo
Cruel and tormenting
Compassionately
Seeing us in them
How I adore
The chaos in them
In them
In them
Of you
Of you
Today you were far away
and I didn’t ask you why
What could I say
I was far away
You just walked away
and I just watched you
What could I say
How close am I to losing you
Tonight you just close your eyes
and I just watch you
slip away
How close am I to losing you
Hey, are you awake
Yeah I’m right here
Well can I ask you about today
How close am I to losing you
How close am I to losing
Wallow in the mire and then you’re at the pinnacle
the fabricated smiles so wide, that of hope
Your composure is so greater
And you hold yourself so well
Inside, you cling to pieces
Of a broken carousel
Tonight these streets are heaving
With young hearts on the chase
We’ll have this place on lockdown
It’s here for you to taste
The night is ours
You’re wide awake, and I’m the same
Darling, you’re not the only one
Oh, wide awake, and I’m the same
Darling, you’re not the only one
Only one, only one
Baby, we are born and raised too cynical
In the wake of a miracle, we’d never believe
You impersonate the seasons
Your gold autumnal haze
But something dies inside you
When winter rears its face
Tonight these streets are heaving
With young hearts on the chase
We’ll have this place on lockdown
It’s here for you to taste
The night is ours
You’re wide awake, and I’m the same
Darling, you’re not the only one
Oh, wide awake, and I’m the same
Darling, you’re not the only one
Only one, only one
It takes a lot to know a man
It takes a lot to understand
The warrior, the sage
The little boy enraged
It takes a lot to know a woman
A lot to understand what’s humming
The honeybee, the sting
The little girl with wings
It takes a lot to give, to ask for help
To be yourself, to know and love what you live with
It takes a lot to breathe, to touch, to feel
The slow reveal of what another body needs
It takes a lot to know a man
A lot to know, to understand
The father and the son
The hunter and the gun
It takes a lot know a woman
A lot to comprehend what’s coming
The mother and the child
The muse and the beguiled
It takes a lot to give, to ask for help
To be yourself, to know and love what you live with
It takes a lot to breathe, to touch, to feel
The slow reveal of what another body needs
It takes a lot to give, to ask for help
To be yourself, to know and love what you live with
It takes a lot to breathe, to touch, to feel
The slow reveal of what another body needs
It takes a lot to live, to ask for help
To be yourself, to know and love what you live with
It takes a lot to breathe, to touch, to feel
The slow reveal of what another body needs
What are you so afraid to lose?
What is it you’re thinking that will happen if you do?
What are you so afraid to lose?
(You wrote me to tell me you’re nervous and you’re sorry)
What is it you’re thinking that will happen if you do?
(Crying like a baby saying “this thing is killing me”)
What are you so afraid to lose?
(You wrote me to tell me you’re nervous and you’re sorry)
What is it you’re thinking that will happen if you do?
(Crying like a baby saying “this thing is killing me”)
You wrote me to tell me you’re nervous and you’re sorry
Crying like a baby saying “this thing is killing me”
“My ordinary became your special
My special became your ordinary”
People - Agust D.
.
My first days of august have been full of melancholy, a year ago i was in a different place, with different people, i miss that place and the people i met, by the other hand i’ve reading Godsgrave by Jay Kristoff and listening to my bangtan boys of course, I love this color palette, i think it complements very good. Anyway I hope you’re doing great, keep safe and sound! Wash your hands and drink lots of water ~~
ig: amyyreadz
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Wondering why my mood swing spectrum is always between being chaotic and being melancholic…
I long for the future
There’s so many things that I hope will work out for the best
And I wish my heart will be safe,
I can’t wait for the day
when I won’t turn my head when someone’s eyes look like yours
when every quote I read makes my hand carve a new piece,
a new letter,
to bleed again about the same things
When I woke up and opened my curtains, there was the rising sun
But now there’s you
I can’t forget your location, and your smell
Your birthday or you cat’s name
And I wonder if you ever wish I were there.
You can’t feel the same because you don’t know me like I know you
You don’t know where I rest, where I breathe
You don’t recall what I used to be like
I changed my perfume, and I cut my hair,
and how I wish I could get some feelings out, they’ve always been there
My life has kind of stopped, just like a bad joke
and i don’t think it can go back to what it used to be.
Maybe the past is better left alone, you don’t pour salt on what hurts
I should stop reminiscing about what was, what is and idealizing what will be
but what is the fun of being in the present? Things can get so boring, so predictable
I’ve always been afraid to be known.
Maybe someday I’ll learn how to move on, and how to get over old feelings, and maybe I can let my past to rest
I love changes, yet I’m afraid I won’t recognize myself.
